I don’t think I’ll ever feel like I’m good enough for anyone but I just needed to get that out of my system.
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my brain whenever I find a new thing to fantasize about
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AZRA TABASSUM (or @5000letters)
from My Heart is Full of Open Windows;
original photos and edit
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I have a deep love and admiration for the ones who genuinely care for the well-being of others.
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12, 15, 46, 127. hi Chris
12. Top five songs:1. Cyber Stockholm Syndrome - Rina Sawayama2. Newsflash! - NIKI3. Trip - Ella Mai4. SICKO MODE - Travis Scott5. Tie Me Down - Gryffin15. I matured and slowly bettered myself. I started investing into myself and my own growth46. I’m paranoid about how others view me127. My friends make me happy. Oh and cuddling :)
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I commend people that act upon how they feel. All my life I grew up in an environment that told me I wasn’t supposed to express how I feel because it was irrelevant. Because everyone else’s opinions and emotions mattered more and some how it manifested into who I became and who I am today.
To be quite honest, I think I’m more afraid to express and feel. It’s much easier to consider everyone else’s emotions and feelings while leaving mine in the back burner. Possibly another reason why I tend to keep the energy in the rooms I’m in light and with laughters and another to why I don’t really particularly enjoy talking about how I feel about things.
Think I’ve gotten way too good at suppressing my emotions that when I do have a moment of feeling or when I do have a moment of expressing it, it’s so overwhelming no matter how amazing or how miserable it’s making me feel. Or I just hide how I feel as best that I can.
All of this boils down to me concluding that I’m afraid to feel, but deep down, I love romance. I love love. Yet, I can’t seem to allow myself to live it. Seems like a problem I haven’t quite solved quite yet. Obviously there’s other factors that led me to this point in my life. I guess I’ll just have to figure it out a step at a time.
At least I can admit it now.
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If I could I’d just leave for forever. Just feeling like shit all time.
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