evaningotham
evaningotham
26 | tiktok: evaningotham | ao3: itwasalastditcheffort
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“If you don’t tell me, then I don’t have to lie and pretend not to know about it.” “Yes, taking your mask off in front of me counts.” and other things Jim Gordon has to keep repeating to all the vigilantes who pop in and out of his life.
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spoiler: google show me this guy’s balls
batman: keep this line secure
red robin: you heard the mod, chat. keep it stream related or get banned
red hood: none of those words are in the bible
robin: incorrect, obviously there are pronouns and conjunctions and such that are in all texts-
red hood: i know that! it’s a joke
robin: well then be funny
batman: please- i’m being serious
nightwing: it’s hard to take you seriously when we all saw you fall down those stairs earlier
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i just know jason gets SOOO embarrassed when he does something and it’s similar to dick or bruce. he says a phrase dick often says and dies inside or he is talking and realizes he’s using the same tone and words his dad uses. he’s doing a move in combat and remembers exactly who he learned it from. his hair looks a little too much like bruce’s one day. dick would wear this hoodie. he’s eating takeout from a restaurant dick introduced him to. he’s just like his dad and his big brother and he wants to scream because EWWWWWWWWWW
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Batman/Catwoman: The Gotham War: Red Hood #1 (Gotham War 4/8)
Cryptic ACAB Jason 🤌
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so i have this brucie wayne hc that all of gotham upper society and the press thinks he did the rich guy thing and adopted all his bastards. like, that's a lot of dark haired orphans you got there, brucie. they look a lot like you, brucie.
and from the public perspective this totally makes sense. the man is known as kind of a slut. he would totally have bastard children. the drakes are also high society and right next door. that's some random street kid from crime alley? hell no, brucie's one night stand tracked him down. he's adopted a 17 year old girl from out of nowhere? obviously some ex has caught up with him. the press and public just can't understand why someone with his wealth would just adopt random kids for no other reason.
then damian turns up.
and brucie fully admits this one is biologically his.
and all of gotham is forced to go 'huh'.
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the classic trope of "what if you went to a town and it was weird" never fails
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I am convinced the reason powerful, intelligent women like Talia and Selina are attracted to him is because he possesses no rizz. Absolutely none.
Like when they first meet Bruce out of the suit, they're expecting to be charmed with his charisma, but since he's comfortable with both of them, he goes on a two hour long conspiracy rant on how the Pentagon is being controlled by an ancient Babylonian blood cult.
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Bruce about to reveal his identity to the JL
Bruce: “I’m going to do something that may traumatize two of you. I am not sorry.”
Oliver: “oh come on Batman your identity isn’t that special.”
Bruce going full whiny play boy: “Dinah! Ollie is being mean to me!!!”
Oliver: blue screens
Dinah: “YOU BITCH!?”
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Damian: It took me years to understand the "why the long face" punchline to the "a horse walks into a bar" joke because I just thought that’s a normal sized face to have if you’re a horse. It never occurred to me judge a horse by the standards of man.
Damian: I was a better person than all of you.
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Bruce not wanting to dance at random with people just vying for his attention because DANCING WAS SOMETHING HE DID WITH HIS MOM excuse me I'm going to go fling myself into the sun.
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I love it when comics gently make fun of Dick and Wally's old fashioned names in such a nice good-spirited way! Yeah we've all heard every joke possible about Dick's name by now, so instead just a cute nod to how old-school it is feels so much more fun.
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So in my class we name our glue sticks to stop the kids losing or mistreating them - they're much less likely to lose a glue lid if you're shouting "oh no, Alfred's been decapitated". It's fun.
Now, I'm a big batfam girlie ✨ so naturally I named all our glues after these characters. We have Richard and Bruce and Stephanie and Barbara etc. you see the point.
Recently, the first glue stick ran out. It had to go in the bin so unfortunately it "died", and you'll never guess which glue stick was the first to die...
It was Jason.
You could not conceive the sound I made as I had to throw Jason in the bin as all the children shouted things like "Jason's dead" and "noooo Jason!"
Worst things worse, I couldn't even explain how ironic that was that Jason, the second robin, was the first glue to go!
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mic check one two one two
my duolingo streak is almost to 365 days who cheered
masterlist
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FUCK. honestly just FUCK. We missed a very important day yesterday.
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green lantern (hal jordan): *making fun of the discowing outfit*
nightwing: actually. i based the design off of my dad’s old costume. yknow, my dad that was murdered right in front of me? when i was eight? and i had to watch him fall to his death?
hal jordan: ……..oh.
nightwing: (:
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One thing I appreciate in The Batman (2004) show is the way Dick is always helping people up.
Like, my boy is always helping everyone out. It's such a Dick Grayson thing to do. I love that they put that little detail in there.
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