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mybworlds · 1 day

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Chapter 4: Be different

Pairing: joel miller x f!reader (no use of Y/N) | Rating: 18+ Minors DNI | W.C.: 2.5k

Summary: Your life sounds perfect: you live with a perfect man, you live in your dream house, you do the job you love, you don't miss anything, except love and passion.

Warnings: no use of Y/N, use of you, reader is a photographer, reader has no physical descriptions except hair (no type or color) long enough to hold on to, unspecified age gap, Joel and reader are two cheaters, for a while. Smut, use of pet names, dirty talk, masturbation, unprotected PiV but the first time, creampies, comeplay, oral (both f and m recieving), exhibitionism, size kink, personal use of an unspecified sex toy. No outbreak here. Let me know if I missed anything!

Masterlist

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Thx for the dividers @saradika-graphics

Taglist @harriedandharassed

You laid in your bed for almost an hour, but you can't get to sleep, remorse preventing you from sleeping.

Patrick felt you tense all evening and tried to relax you by preparing a warm bath first, a massage later, and finally holding you close to him until he falls asleep. You try to close your eyes, but the image of Joel clinging to you, his crooked smile before kissing you or have sex with you haunts you all night long. When it's almost six o'clock, you text Daisy telling her you have important things to tell her, you're sure that given the hour she's still asleep, it's Monday, and you doubt she's out clubbing with some of her pilates friends.

"Honey, are you awake yet?" Patrick asks with his voice still slurred from sleep turning in bed toward you, you barely turn your torso toward him and mumble an excuse.

You are a liar.

"What's your schedule today?" he asks clutching you even tighter resting his head on your shoulder and encircling you with his arm.

"Nothing for today, in fact I was thinking of staying home," you answer him by settling on your pillow, but staying with your eyes open staring into the dark "What about you?"

"I'm going out around 10. I have to go to a company only." he replies giving you a kiss between your shoulder and neck, "Baby, I was thinking. . . what if we invited some friends over for a barbecue on Friday night?" he asks you "If you have plans, we could postpone." he adds giving you another kiss in the same spot.

You shrug caught by a shiver, "Patrick. . ." you mutter turning to him, you would like to tell him the thruth, but you know you will hurt him so much, but you have never been someone who lies, someone who keeps quiet about things of such gravity. You feel like a monster.

The guilt is eating you alive.

Patrick's lips are soft and immediately seek yours, which very shyly open, welcoming his tongue. You kiss him, but your eyes fill with tears.

How do the others betray and go on living as if nothing is wrong?

"Why are you crying?" he asks you turning on the bedside light and turning back to you worriedly, he gives you a kiss on the shoulder "You can talk to me, you know. I'm listening," he adds again.

"I know," you say bending your head toward him.

Part of you says talk to him, the other part that deep down it's true you betrayed him, but it won't happen again so why destroy a ten plus years relationship?

He wraps an arm around your waist and looks at you with sweetness and a little concern, "Love."

"Patrick, it must be that damn pill I take for my period!" you exclaim as more tears wet the pillow "Maybe among the side effects there's mood swings." you add almost sobbing and pulling up with your nose.

He holds you tightly to him, "It's okay, relax." with one arm you see him close the light and then return to wrap you in his arms "Sssh, it's okay, I'm here."

You love Patrick, but sex with Joel Miller was great.

"You had sex with the best man?!" Daisy exclaims with a smile and squinting eyes "And? Did he make you come?" she adds, almost shouting, as you shush her by looking around and hoping you haven't attracted anyone's attention, "So?" the meddler urges.

"Yes."

"Uh huh!" she exclaims taking a sip of her nonalcoholic drink "I want some sinful details, please let me dream. Jordan can only do it missionary style now! He's good for goodness sake, but I'd also like something new!" she complains, rolling her eyes.

"Don't make the same mistake I did," you comment sipping your fruity cocktail.

"Honey, between you and me there is a difference. Jordan and I are still fine, you and Patrick are in crisis even though you keep denying it." you sigh heavily "If this shake-up serves to clear your head welcome, in fact I suggest you find him again and have another greeeeat session."

"Daisy! Stop it." you exclaim, lowering your head "It mustn't happen again, in fact I hope I never see him again."

"But why? Honey, you could have had a guy who banged you on the bed to seek only his own pleasure and take the edge off, this Joel on the other hand, yes he fucked you, but he fucked you good."

"What do you know about that?" you ask her.

"You have a different light in your eyes, even if you think it's guilt." she comments, staying silent for a minute "So how many times did he make you cum?" she asks you mischievously.

"More than once."

"Oh wow, that's wonderful." she comments dreamily "He used his fingers?" she asks again.

"No."

She whistles in approval, "I want to meet him,"

"Daisy!" you scold her, squinting.

"I only want to tell him to have more meetings with you." you laugh nervously "And in what position?"

"Um. . . missionary, but he made me feel. . ." you search for words, but those words make you shudder because you don't want to feel that way and yet you do.

"Alive? Wanted?"

"Wanted." you answer.

"Will you look for him again?"

"As far as I know his first and last name could be made up, as could everything he told me about himself. After all, I did it first, I mean. . . yes I told him I was engaged, but after I had sex with him," you answer a little uneasily.

"What about him?"

"Nothing. Daisy, but he can't say anything, we're two strangers and it's normal that there's no implication other than physical between us." you reply, shrugging your shoulders. You continue to chat some more now about Joel, now about your jobs, now about some memories, finally you remember Patrick's proposal to you about the barbecue and you invite her and Jordan for Friday night, she enthusiastically accepts.

Patrick planned big things, he bought pounds of meat, potatoes, sandwiches to stuff, several bottles of beer and some wine, liquor, in short he buys anything so that your guests can leave and think they ate their fill and had a good time. You and Patrick invite many friends, those who are married, those close to marriage, those who like you are cohabiting, only a few are still single.

You devote yourself to setting up the garden by inserting among the branches of the saplings you have many small lights, you then put in just before your guests arrive even the outside speakers for some soft music to accompany you. It's perfect, it looks like a fairy tale garden.

Patrick observes as you the garden waiting for your guests by hugging you from behind, "You did a great job, my love," he says kissing you in your hair. You lean back against his chest "We did a great job" you correct him smiling.

The first guests arrive and Patrick gets to work, you meanwhile pour them drinks exchanging small talk with the two wives of your partner's friends, you show them around the house, in short you act like a perfect housewife. You bring the speakers outside and put on the playlist of soft music as you already planned, when you turn around you see yet other couples, some you know, some you don't, and then you see Daisy running up to hugging you glad to be there, Daisy is joined shortly afterwards by her boyfriend who greets you with a big hug too and a warm smile, then Jordan excuses himself and walks over to Patrick leaving you and Daisy to your chatter. Everything is going very well, Patrick cooked everything divinely, your guests are intent on drinking, eating, laughing, chatting, in short it's a very successful evening ber. You and Daisy are on one of the little white chairs in the garden and she's telling you a silly joke, when you turn to your guests and see a face you never, ever thought you'd see there: Joel Miller, assuming that's his name.

"Oh, shit!" you exclaim, suddenly giving your back to your guests as you turn fully toward your friend who looks at you puzzled, "What's going on?" she asks.

"He's here," you reply impatiently between your teeth.

"Um, he who?" she asks still puzzled.

"Him." you insist, Daisy assumes a surprised expression.

"Oh, and who is he?"

"I dunno." you reply full of fear "Why is he here?"

"Will you tell me who is among them? If you do that you draw even more attention, my friend." she says again "Oh, oh," she adds.

"And what are you doing here?" someone asks behind you.

You look with frightened eyes first at your friend and then turn toward the person who just spoke to you, when you do, you see Joel standing next to you staring at you with a frown, you turn for a moment toward Daisy, who raises her eyebrows and then says, "I'll see you later." then she stands up and after looking at Joel for a longer moment she reaches Jordan.

"What are you doing here?" he asks you again.

You get up from your chair, "I could ask you the same!" you exclaim.

"You made it!" Patrick exclaims behind you coming up behind you all smiling at Joel "My friend!" he exclaims again hugging Joel with a pat, Joel weakly returns the hug still amazed to have found you there probably "Have you two introduced yourselves yet?" Patrick continues loosening the hug "Joel, this is my better half and my love, this is my long time friend, Joel Miller." Patrick says.

You're not sure which one of you has the more surprised look on your face, the fact is you try to disguise as best you can your already prior acquaintance by shaking hands, but you immediately lower your gaze, fuck this isn't possible, this must be a nightmare.

"How are things going, Joel?" Patrick asks placing himself at your side and absentmindedly resting an arm on your shoulders.

"Not bad." he replies simply shrugging his shoulders.

"Sarah? Your little one now how old is she?" Patrick asks again.

You wander your gaze from him to Joel, Joel tries not to even dignify you with a glance "She's fine, she's fifteen and in the midst of rebellion, you know adolescence!"

The two of them give each other a small, complicit smile, "Honey, would you please go get Joel and me a beer?" you nod with a small smile at Patrick, while casting a puzzled glance at Joel.

It takes you longer than it should, you are in fact lost in thought that Joel himself has cheated on his partner, and what's more, he has a daughter! So, you should feel even less guilty. When you return to the two of them, you find them intent on laughing and shaking their heads about an incident happened in Joel's company, "Thank you, babe." Patrick says giving you a chaste kiss on the lips, a kiss you barely manage to return considering who is in front of you. "Thank you." replies Joel in a neutral tone to whom you somewhat brusquely hand his beer.

"Patrick!" Edward, another of your friends, calls him, "Come on, lazybones, there are still these sausages to roast!"

"Coming!" replies Patrick immediately, waving an arm "Love, will you entertain Joel some more while I'm gone?" he asks in a whisper.

"Why?" you ask hesitantly.

"Well, ever since his wife left with his daughter, he's always alone and I feel sorry for him." he replies causing a knot in your throat, you turn a glance toward Joel who sips his beer looking toward the small crowd "Can you do this for me?" you nod "Thanks, babe." he adds again placing a kiss on your forehead and pulling away.

You hesitate, sighing thoughtlessly. You lean closer to him, "So...you and Patrick are friends?"

"Yeah, and you and him are together." he says looking down at his beer turning the bottle over in his hands "Patrick has always been a lucky son of a bitch," he adds taking a sip of his beer "Always good grades, nice girls," he adds again "I had my good times too, uh. I don't envy Patrick, I never did." he clarifies and then finally looks into your eyes for a long moment "So, you are unhappy with Patrick, uh?"

You furrow your brow, "Don't judge me," you reply annoyed.

"I'm not."

"Yes, you are, I recognize that look," you say still piqued.

"No, you don't. Me too, I thought everything was fine with my ex-wife, and look where I am now," he continues, taking the last sip of beer.

"What happened?" you ask him taking the bottle from his hands and walking to the kitchen inside to throw the bottle away.

"The most trivial thing in the world," he tells you as you walk into the kitchen "I was so focused on work, she wanted more attention and so one day she made me find the lawyer's letter." he concludes in a sigh leaning against the kitchen cabinet "She then moved to Michigan near her parents and took Sarah away."

"'m sorry," you say laying a hand on his forearm squeezing it just barely "How long ago did that happen?" you ask again.

"Six years ago." he replies raising his eyebrows at you with a sad look "Since then, the idea of tying myself down scares me." he confesses "I can't do it, it's like disappointment, defeat blocked me." he adds shaking his head "Since then I only have casual encounters." he says again looking at you, you lower your gaze "However, usually, they are all single women. I never had sex with a busy woman or a friend's girlfriend." he clarifies again "I'm not a homewrecker. In fact, sorry if I crossed the line last time and even made you feel uncomfortable, that was not my intention."

You shake your head, "We were wrong, Joel." you add, barely squeezing his shoulder "I'm sorry if I overreacted, I knew that. . . I mean, that it was just sex, but I've been a bit hysterical."

He gently strokes one cheek and then absentmindedly touches your lower lip with a fingertip, you observe first his lips and then his eyes "If you look at me like that, we could start again." he warns you with a half smile.

"The truth is. . . on the one hand I'm regretful, but on the other. . . I loved every single moment." you admit, looking him straight in the eye.

"So do I." he says, his gaze wandering from your eyes to your lips. The situation could escalate at any moment, when interrupting everything is Patrick himself "There you are!" he exclaims enthusiastically "What's going on?" he asks, Joel immediately withdrawing his hand from your face.

"Nothing." you reply, pulling your hand away from his shoulder "Joel was just telling me about the divorce."

You look Joel in the eye for a longer moment and then turn away from him and flank Patrick.

"Bad story." comments Patrick simply "Come on, come on over. The sausages are ready to be served and the boys want to try karaoke."

"Oh, yay." you comment unenthusiastically rolling your eyes, Joel smiles at your reaction.

You and Joel don't share any other moment alone and that's okay, you don't want any of your friends or Patrick's friends to notice this connection with Joel. You just met each other, or so you make believe!

You are alone in the garden, lying on a lawn chair staring at the sky; there are quite a few stars visible that evening. In another moment, you would have run for your camera to take pictures of that beautiful starry sky, but not tonight. In fact, you think about Joel. You think that no matter how hard you try to pretend that everything is fine and that what happened with Joel will never happen again, a part of you feels, however, that it won't. Joel is not just anyone, but a Patrick's friend, and knowing Patrick, it's likely that he will invite him again to your place.

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mybworlds · 6 days

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Your wish is my command

pairing: Tim Rockford x f!reader (no use of Y/N) | w.c. 4.2k

Summary: You and Tim Rockford have been friends since college days and partners since you both worked for the NYPD. A mission brings you very close and more intimate than you should.

Warnings: no use of Y/N, use of you, reader has no physical descriptions, Tim and reader are friends. Smut, use of pet names, dirty talk, masturbation, unprotected PiV, creampies, comeplay, oral sex, size kink. Let me know if I missed anything!

A/N Hello, new one shot. This time it's Tim Rockford the main character and you, this is a mature one-shot, so minors don't interact.

follow @mybworlds and turn on notifications to get notified when I post new fics

Thx @saradika-graphics for the dividers.

You and Tim have been friends for a long time now. You met on an ordinary day at the college: he was the classic perfect person, you the usual latecomer. He usually sat in the front row, you always in the last row. He took notes, you fiddled with the pen or pretended to take notes.

In short, two people who have nothing in common.

One day it was pouring and you were late as usual, the lesson had already started when you entered with a lot of noise into the classroom which was half deserted that day due to the bad weather. Your arrival made the few dozen people turn around, including him. Tim.

At the time he was a beardless student with crew cut hair, pronounced features and a proud look. You remember how he looked at you that day, he seemed pissed off at your interruption, but at the same time interested. It was the first day that your eyes met, but that day you gave each other nothing but that look. The next few days you and him kept crossing paths to courses and then one day he was the one who arrived unexpectedly late and that day you arrived early and sat in the front row. When he arrived he gave you a small crooked smile and then he started taking notes. From time to time each glanced at the other or at the other's notebook. Soon at the end of the lesson you found yourself in the canteen exchanging notes and finally you introduced yourselves.

Tim has always been a model student, excellent grades, good presence, even if he always tended to stay aloof and keep everyone away.

Except you. He always made an exception for you.

He's always been a huge asshole to others, he never helped others either for a theoretical or practical exam, he always tended - and still continues - to answer badly to everyone, many times he deserved to be told to fuck off, but you never had a reason, you always felt a deep tenderness for him.

You can say that you grew up together, you developed over time a relationship of esteem, trust and affection which then slowly led you to study together, rarely to go out together and from time to time to squeeze your hands affectionately each other, to touch your fingers and to smile at each other with a complicit air.

Furthermore, Tim has always had his own way to tease you, that is, he always tells you "Your wish is my command", at first you rolled your eyes a little annoyed then you got used to it and you started laughing about it and smiling at him when he says this sentence.

Time flies.

And college days end, however you and Tim don't get out of your each other sight. The two of you continue your journey together. You both want to become detectives, you prepared together for the exam and together you passed it. When they announced your results, you both turned in each other's direction, hugged each other tightly, and whispered in each other's ears, "We'll still be together."

It was your hope, you certainly never thought of actually going to work together at the NYPD and even becoming partners.

Now you are two grown adults and Tim is no longer the youngster of the college, even his face has changed. Now he's a man. His features are now well defined, the slight roundness of youth has given way to the harder features typical of age.

As time changes people, your feelings for him have also changed. You are friends, it's true, but deep down you can't help but feel an ever-increasing feeling towards him. Even if it is a feeling never expressed for fear of losing him. You went out many times with other men, but it was just a one-night stand, the next day they didn't even see you anymore.

Now, since the two of you are good detectives, you and Tim have been assigned a kidnapping case and your investigations have led you to believe that the kidnapped boy could be found in a hotel not far from New York. In order to avoid compromising everything, you booked a hotel room by pretending to be a couple on your honeymoon

The two of you search the floor from time to time so you can be sure of your information, but you find nothing. Nothing that can help you. It's almost one o'clock now and after searching some more, you retreat to your room.

The bed is double so you can't do anything but share it. You trust Tim, you love him. You feel perfectly safe and comfortable with him.

You are both lying on your sides looking into each other's eyes. You are wearing a thin night gown, he is wearing a dark t-shirt and shorts. You've done it dozens of times, so you're not embarrassed being like this in his presence.

“Tim,” you tell him, “why did you never get married?”

He places a hand under his cheek and shrugs, "I dunno, maybe 'cause I have a bad temper!" he exclaims with a smile making you smile too.

"Well, a little!" you exclaim, squeezing his hand resting there on the mattress.

"If I had to marry someone I would marry myself or you," he tells you calmly because you two are friends and there has never been anything between you beyond friendship. Even if you always hoped for something more.

"I know," you tell him without stopping looking him in the eyes "Tim, can I ask you something? Please don't laugh."

"Sure."

"What's it like to make love?" he frowns "No, no sorry forget it." you add immediately regretting the question asked.

For a long moment there is a dull silence, then he cups your cheek “Don’t worry, you can ask. It's nice, if you are in love with that person. Otherwise it's just sex and it's equally good, but it's different."

"From the way you're talking about it, you've felt both." you say, he nods "So far I've only had sex, never made love. It's so bad to be seen only as an object to satisfy people's needs and the next day to pretend that you don't even exist." this time he is the one who holds your hand tightly.

"I'm sorry, darlin'." you nods silently “Really,” he adds, caressing your same cheek as before and just barely threading his thick fingers into your hair.

“Can you hug me?” you ask him, barely looking him in the eyes.

"Sure, c'mere." he says, turning to a supine position and opening his arms to welcome you and immediately envelop you, holding you tightly against his chest.

Oh, it feels so good.

He smells good, he has a strong scent that envelops your nostrils, he smells like home.

Tim smells like this. Home, love, a safe haven. You wouldn't want to be anywhere else but here. In his arms.

You don't even know how long you stay like this, entwined. Your nose against his neck, his nose in your hair.

"You've always been my favorite, you know?" you move your head just to look him in the eyes and smile at him.

"How much did you drink earlier down at the bar?"

"Just a few shots of bourbon."

You caress his scratchy cheek "It shows, you know? When did you ever say these words to me, Tim?" you ask him, looking him in the eyes.

"I'm sorry I never told you, baby." he states, cupping your cheek and stroking it with a finger in a slow gesture. Your faces are so close. You can even see the number of his eyelashes.

Before you can fully think about what you're doing, you bring your lips to his and kiss him closing your eyes. You would have apologized if he hadn't kissed you back by sticking his hand in even deeper in your hair thus deepening your kiss.

When you interrupt your kiss, you reopen your eyes suddenly feeling a strong embarrassment making its way inside you. You ruined everything, your friendship with him, your complicity, now he will think who knows about you. You lost him.

"What's wrong?" he asks you caressing your cheek gently, frowning, almost understanding your sense of guilt make its way inside you.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I . . ." you say, starting to get up and move away from him, but he places a hand on your forearm.

"'bout what?" he asks perplexed, "Honey, there's nothing to be sorry about."

"I don't wanna lose you because of. . . this, please."

He frowns, “Lil one, there's nothing to be sorry for and you have no reason to think about losing me."

You visibly relax, he puts his hand in your hair again and brings your face closer to his kissing you, partly out of surprise and partly because of the gesture itself, you find yourself moaning softly into his mouth.

It's his next gesture that then leads you to understand that you are not just a friend to him.

He places his hands on your forearms pulling you onto him without stopping kissing you. Your kiss is no longer as sweet as before, it's demanding, almost desperate as if you were afraid that this strange spell can break and bring you back to reality.

You find yourself on top of him, your hands together and fingers intertwined. You feel small on him almost as if he could engulf you.

"Oh, baby . . ." he murmurs.

"What are we doing, Tim?" you ask him softly, slightly tightening your grip on his hands.

He doesn't respond, he just rubs his nose against yours, then he says what you never thought you'd hear him say, "Rub on my cock," you almost gasp, but you can't stop. You do what he wants.

You open your legs so that your still covered private parts come into contact and you start moving back and forth on him. You feel his thick and long intimacy still soft for the first time against your covered womanhood.

You shudder. He moans.

The grip on your hands increases as you move on him, you slowly feel him growing under you, you feel him get hard and his breath hitches.

Your arousal is starting to build up in your thong, fuck. You start moaning without even realizing it. It's so beautiful.

"Fuck me," he almost complains.

You take a step further, you release your grip from his hands for a moment and you lift the night gown you are wearing, remaining completely naked on him except for the thong you're still wearing.

He stares at your almost completely naked body, his gaze is concentrated, absorbed as if he were contemplating a breathtaking masterpiece.

"Oh, you are so beautiful." he whispers.

You lie on top of him, "Tim," you moan, threading a hand into his hair, scratching his scalp softly.

"Sweetheart." he murmurs kissing you softly, as his hands gently caress your back.

"Are we sure 'bout. . .?" you ask unsure, searching his eyes and finding them darker for the strong desire.

“It's the only thing I've always been sure 'bout,” you look at him confused, “I've always felt something for you." you blink several times even more confused than before, unable to reply with words suitable for the moment "Now, stop talkin', lemme show you the pleasure of making love." he adds, making you reverse your positions so that now it's you on the mattress.

You feel almost disoriented when he kisses you again and then moves on to your jaw and your neck, you almost gasp when he starts kissing your breast and wraps his lips around your nipple which immediately hardens, while with his other hand he palpates your other breast.

"Tim..." you sob.

"Shh, 's okay." it reassures you a few inches from your breast looking for your eyes "Lemme worship your wonderful body, baby,” he adds, giving the same attention to the other breast as well.

His sweet methodical attention is slowly taking you towards your climax, you close your eyes and without even realizing it you start to moan under his sweet and precise caresses.

His lips trail further down between your legs, “Will you let me take this off?" you look down with half-closed eyes. Seeing Tim, your lifetime friend, between your legs with that serious and concentrated look, his messy hair, his darker eyes causes you other strong shivers that shake you inside reverberating there.

You open your legs and lift your pelvis thus giving him your silent permission to take off your underwear too, feel his fingers on your hips undressing you completely makes you tremble.

Fuck.

"Your skin is so soft. . . what idiots those who used you and threw you away. . . What an idiot I was for never having had the courage to get even closer to you." he admits throwing your thong somewhere and then looking into your eyes.

Your heart races, you never thought he would think of you this way.

“Tim, what are you trying to tell me?” You ask him, nibbling on your bottom lip.

He climbs on top of you, surrounding you in his arms and caging you beneath him, "I love you, I always have. I guess. Since that day you burst into the classroom during that flood." he admits and his admission makes you miss a beat, you can't believe it, so that's why he's always been there for you, that's why he's never treated you badly, he loves you.

Oh, Gosh.

You lift towards his face and kiss him, threading your hands through his hair, while he kisses you back.

His lips are so soft, his kisses the sweetest you've ever received. You could come even like this without him touching you, but you need to get some air and so after a while you move your faces away from each other.

You look into each other's eyes, then he begins his sweet torture again by kissing your neck, your breasts, your belly with renewed attention and then goes down there. He searches your eyes before probing your hot, tender flesh, when you nod, almost holding your breath, he grazes your sex with two fingers and you let out a strangled moan, "You're so ready, my love." he moans.

"How did you call me?" you ask him in a hoarse voice.

"My love."

"Repeat it, please, say it again." you say, feeling your eyes stinging from the emotion of his words.

"Oh my pleasure," he tells you in a hoarse voice "my love." he adds before slowly moving up and down his fingers at the entrance to your dripping cunt.

He then moves to the side so as to have better access to your intimacy, then very slowly inserts two fingers inside you making your skin crawl and your eyes close with a small moan.

His fingers dig into you softly and slowly, he stays still like that for a while to let you get used to his intrusion, then he starts moving them in and out at an ever increasing pace making you arch and moan loudly.

The contractions of your peak get stronger and stronger, "Come, my love, I feel how your pussy is squeezing my fingers," you don't have to be begged because in no time your back arches violently moaning his name.

It was so so good. And breathtaking.

He slowly removes his fingers from your pussy and you leave a little moan slowly catching your breath, when you reopen your eyes you see him licking his fingers still full of your release, “Oh, fuck.” you moan, opening your mouth in an almost shocked expression.

“You're delicious, baby,” he says, slowly licking his fingers without leaving your eyes.

His words destabilize you, his moans of approval shake you to the core, amplifying your ever-increasing desire for him even more.

"Tim. . ." the shivers still ripple your skin, but you can't get enough "I want you," you confess to him, swallowing.

“Oh, me too, love, me too,” he whispers, smiling at you and you return his smile with a knowing look "You have to come one more time first so you can be even wider for me," your still pulsating and soaked arousal seems to become even more wetter.

"I knew your cock was big," you tell him using a dirty language, it's not like you, but everything is different now.

“I want to taste you,” your eyes widen, “'s that okay with you?”

“Yes, please,” you say almost pleadingly.

"Your every wish is an order," he teases you and then lowers himself between your legs pulling them onto his shoulders.

You almost gasp at that scene then your breath breaks when his lips kiss your mound, "Fuck," you whisper feeling more excitement building up inside you, you arch completely when you feel his lips open and lick all along your entrance, you moan as you feel his hands exposing you completely to his mouth and his sweet tongue tasting you with slow oscillating movements that make you tremble under him, the climax is building inside you again, your vision gets blurry and then what makes you explode is his thumb that caresses your little bundle of nerves with concentric movements.

Your climax explodes violently, you tremble, you grit your teeth, moaning shamelessly and placing a hand in his hair, you saw stars behind your eyelids.

"'m here," he says, gently caressing your thigh, your eyes are still closed, but you smile at him, passing a hand through his hair.

"You're beautiful, sweetheart." he tells you, lying on top of you again and kissing you softly on your lips "Forgive me if I never had the courage to tell you how I felt about you." he adds, slipping a hand into your hair, massaging your scalp in a tender gesture.

As your orgasm fades away, you open again your eyes "There is nothing to forgive." you smile at him "I don't know exactly how long, but I know that you are not just a friend, even if in order not to lose you I have always tried not to think of you in certain ways." you tell him looking into his eyes, he looks back smiling at you "I love you, I'm sorry I denied myself all this for years."

He caresses and sweetly kisses your face, while saying "You don't know how much it hurt me to see you hanging out with those little men who made you suffer so much." he pauses then adds "I would have treated you as you deserved, with me you would have been treated like the queen you are."

"You have always been a great egomaniac." you tease him "But I also fell in love with you for this reason." you admit with a small smile "And now take this off," you order, referring to his t-shirt.

"As I already told you, your every wish is an order." he retorts with a crooked smile and then stands up to take off the t-shirt and reveal his powerful chest, his broad shoulders, his barely visible belly, "We talked too much, didn't we?" you nod with a knowing smile.

"Yeah, but it was necessary." you say, kissing him repeatedly on his soft lips, savoring the contrast with the roughness of his uneven beard.

You reverse your positions with a flick of your hips, now you're on top of him again and the effect you have on him is now clearly visible, "You're beautiful," you tell him, letting your gaze wander for a moment from his face to his broad chest to his still covered shaft. You sit astride him again and start rubbing yourself on his cock, your excitement hasn't died down yet so now it's different. You place your hands on his chest and move on him back and forth moaning softly, his hands rest on your hips helping you with the movements and, although you want to see the effect that you have on him, you can't help but close your eyes completely overwhelmed by those emotions.

"Oh, you're a sight to behold..." he comments, "I can't wait to be buried inside you," he adds in a low hoarse tone "Now stop provoking me and start getting serious, hun," he adds almost desperately.

Okay, now no more teasing.

You lean down to kiss him quickly on the lips, then you let your mouth wander along his jaw and neck, you feel him hold his breath and swallow as you make these movements, then go further down his collarbones, you follow his strip of hair that disappears into the elastic of his shorts. You search his eyes before grabbing the waistband of his shorts and pulling them down. His manhood is there leaning against his soft stomach.

Fuck, it's so big. You wrap it delicately in your hand, struggling to wrap it completely as it is so large. It's hot, hard, but soft. It looks like iron covered in velvet.

“Do you just want to watch it?” he provokes you with a hoarse voice, you go back to look at it, his shaft is long crossed by a very evident vein, the tip is red, his balls swollen and heavy. It's a breathtaking sight. You slide your hand slowly along his shaft, lowering and raising the foreskin a few times observing his reaction. Reaction that doesn't take long to arrive; in fact, he lets out a long sigh, leaning his head back on the pillow. "You're so good, my darlin'," he tells you in a strangled voice, while you caress his balls with the other hand.

You want to enjoy every moment, his tense expression, his hisses, his dirty language with which he encourages you, your touches that are bringing him towards the climax and which excite you again too.

Feeling him twitch in your hand is so much more exciting than you've ever felt before. A pearl of pre cum shines in the semi-darkness of the room and you can't stop yourself from bringing your lips to his red tip and licking his pearl. This action of yours makes him squirm beneath you “Oh, baby, suck my cock” he encourages you slipping a hand into your hair, you, already excited and wanting to bring him to his peak, open your mouth even more so as to welcome him even deeper. His flavor is strong, salty, it invades all your senses and it's wonderful "Oh, fuck, my love, how far can you take it?" You open your mouth a little more and relax your throat so you can welcome him even deeper, he's so big that you struggle not to choke, "Shit, shit, shit" he moans, gripping a few strands of hair tighter between his fingers, he moans your name more and more often as you pump him, making your head rise and lower along his shaft, "Love, please stop or I'll end up between your lips" he moans writhing under you, you move away from him leaving strings of saliva on his cock "You're so good," he tells you in a hoarse voice and with shining eyes.

You climb on him again, while he probes your intimacy with his fingers again, you moan as you feel how easily he fills you, "Tim," you moan, closing your eyes tilting your head back for a moment. Then you gently take his erection and bring it to your entrance, his cock slides easily into you making you moan loudly in unison. He takes your hands, intertwining his fingers with yours and then you start to move on him.

Your arousal if possible grows more and more, "You take me so well, my love, go like this, slowly and gently," he tells you in a low voice as if it were a profane prayer, your breasts jiggle as your thrusts become closer and closer and as your orgasm approaches.

"Tim, you fill me up so much, you make me feel so good, oh fuck, fuck, fuck," you start moaning more and more when you're close to orgasm and he too meets your thrusts. Your hands clench even tighter as you reach your climax with a soft cry and he sits up, wrapping you in his arms while hot spurts paint your inner walls.

You lay embraced with each other for some time. You with your nose in his neck and he with his nose in your hair, but this time you did it because you were aware of what truly unites you.

"We would have to work." you remind with a soft smile.

"I know, but I needed to talk to the woman I love," he replies smiling you back "We'd work later, okay?"

You nod silently then you add after a while “I'm hungry,”

"What would you like to eat?" he asks smiling.

"Chinese food."

“Mhm, good choice.” he says giving you a kiss on the head "Room service or there?" he asks.

You look at him with a knowing look. "Room service, I want a second round later," you reply, kissing him and ready to enjoy what life has to offer you with Tim by your side.

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal as tim rockford #Tim Rockford #tim rockford x reader #tim rockford x female reader #tim rockford x you #tim rockford x f!reader #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal fic #pedro pascal fandom

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mybworlds · 12 days

Text

CHAPTER 12

status: ongoing

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

summary: your life is full of 'must'. You live with your overprotective mother who controls every aspect of your life. You have a dream, to write romance novels, but love - real love - you haven't found yet. Your mother has even decided what you must do in your free time: play music. One day, however, when you go to your music teacher's house, you will have an unexpected encounter and from that day on things change…

Masterlist

Before to start. . . Please take your time to read 'cause it's quite lenghty. 📖

rating: 18+ explicit (minors, DNI)

Thanks @vase-of-lilies for the banner and thanks @saradika-graphics for the divider.

Taglist: @harriedandharassed

The weekend - end with Joel unfortunately came to an end. The enchantment is over and everything is back exactly as it was. Or almost, Joel, the night before the two of you went back to your lives, gave you a small set of keys.

"If you want to come here and write, you can. With or without me. There's an important part of you here and it's right that, when you want to, you come. Feel free to do." he told you "If you want to run away and seek refuge, you can do it here."

You are in your room lying on your bed with the small wooden guitar he carved for you a long ago clutched in one hand and the keys to his house in the other. You clutch them tightly to your heart as if to feel Joel close to you. You miss him already.

This makes you realize one thing: there's no longer a place for Jack in your life or in your heart. You want to be with Joel. You want him to be a part of you, you want everyone to know that you don't care that he's older than you, but that you love him. Yes, you love him.

You can't do without him.

Your phone rings.

It's Jack.

"I haven't heard from you once." he says.

"Well, you too." you reply in an icy tone.

"Would you like to talk about what happened a few nights ago?" he asks you.

The truth is that you don't care. You don't want someone like him next to you, someone who makes you feel bad, who doesn't support you, who doesn't understand you. No, thank you.

"There's nothing to say," you reply in the same tone.

"So … are we okay?" he asks.

"No, maybe I wasn't clear. Jack. . . I'm sorry, but I don't want a person who doesn't support me, who doesn't understand what's important to me," you answer.

For a moment you feel like the phone line has gone dead, then he resumes "So, we don't want to see each other again?"

"No." you reply flatly "Bye Jack, have a nice life." you add and then cut off the call.

Your heart beats fast in your chest. You feel as if freed from a burden.

Maybe you were too hard on Jack, but you don’t want continue leading him on, it’s not fair. You don't love him. You never had.

Now you can be with Joel.

But how can you see him if he is no longer in town now?

Simple, you look for something that might convince your mother to let you leave for a few days. You look for an idea, anything to get away, but at the moment you can't think of anything.

You fall asleep looking for an idea.

Your life flows quietly, you go to work at the bar, when you come back you practice your chords, you very rarely go to church with your mother hoping to get some ideas on how you can reach Joel. The man who teaches these classes sees you and approaches you with a big smile. He's a great speaker, has great language property, and you are not surprised that your mother is fascinated by him, but you fear that he is yet another foothold your mother is looking for in the course of her life. The man, a fellow named Mark, will be a few years older than your mother, tells you that he's glad you are there with them, that you too therefore are seeking the salvation of your soul and that only through prayer can this happen.

You lower your head, you don't want to burst out laughing in his face, you don't believe in this, you never had and you won't start now. Everything you hear only increase this your total belief. You are not like your mother who believes whatever she is told. No.

"Boo," your mother says, "have you seen how interesting these classes are?"

Of course.

"Yes, you right. You know, I've been thinking about going deeper," you begin. Your mother's eyes sparkle, she thinks she convinced you and converted you to all this. Not at all.

"You could go for a prayer retreat with Mark and his group." she offers enthusiastically "If I could, I would go too, but I have to work."

You take advantage of it.

"Mom, actually I'd like to go with my friend Kristen and her prayer group, you know, she's also attending. Her group is in the small town near ours, I know they are leaving next week for a prayer retreat, maybe I can go with her so I would have her company."

Kristen is the friend your mother always liked the most, she always saw her as a proper young person, judicious, polite, charitable, in short a perfect friend and girl.

"Fine. But you'll have to let me know then what you think, though, and then next time you and I will go with Mark's group."

Now you just need to let Kristen know.

"We'll talk." you say with a small smile "Would you like a pizza? Shall we eat it at the diner?"

"All right." she replies, taking you under her arm.

The evening unfolds as quietly as possible, you don't talk much, you just make a few sporadic comments about the pizza, the place, the meeting you attended, but nothing more.

Fortunately Joel calls when you returned by now and your mother is in bed. You check to see if you can talk freely and realize that she is soundly asleep. Joel tells you about his day, but more than anything he asks if you have been to his house, he wants to know if you are writing, if you are doing everything to pursue your dream, but you tell him you are going tomorrow.

"I miss you," you tell him, "I wish you were here," you add.

"I can't move, honey." he tells you in a regretful tone "We may not see each other not earlier than three weeks, it's gonna be complicated days for me."

"For me too, Miller. I'll. . ." you stop, you were about to tell him I love you, but then you reconsider, you don't know if your feeling is mutual, and what if he replies he doesn't feel the same way for you? You don't think you can stand such a response from him.

"You, what?" he encourages you, you swallow, afraid, you close your eyes "Baby, are you there?"

"Yes." you answer "I'm very tired, sorry. . ."

"No, no, 's okay. Go to sleep, I wish you good night, baby. A kiss, I hope whatever you dream will come true sooner or later." he says before to hang up the phone.

You will surely dream about him, his dark eyes, his plushy lips smiling at you and kissing you softly, his messy hair falling on his forehead, his arms caging the sides of your face, you dream about him with one hand cupping your face and with the other moving a strand of your hair and smiling at you. You see him on top of you whispering sweet, reassuring words in that sweet, warm voice of his, your hands in his hair as you press yourself against him. His hand along your bare chest, his large hand caressing your breasts, thumb and forefinger teasing first one nipple and then the other. Your breath breaks. His bulge pushing against your inner thigh, your breaths getting shorter and shorter, you almost feel him stroking you with a finger first to taste your intimacy then slowly sinking inside you, inch by inch. You gasp. It feels so good, the rhythm he's giving with his finger that breaks your breath, he then strokes you rhythmically with two fingers, filling you all the way, you swallow squeezing your eyes shut and clutching your sheets in a fist. You mumble his name, bite your lower lip. You feel the blood boil in your veins as he continues to pump in a relentless rhythm inside you, then your mouth opens wide in a dull moan, your lips trembling.

You open your eyes, he's not here, but your imagination brought you into his arms to come violently.

Being in his house without him causes you a strange grip, you feel like you are in a beautiful soulless place. You feel empty, you just look around as if you almost feel a presence around you. You feel ridiculous thinking about this. After all, it's not the first time you've come here, of course it's the first time you're alone here, but you've been with him so many times. There's nothing to be afraid of.

"You recognize this place?" you ask Joel, sending him a message with a photograph of you sitting on his couch.

You turn on the computer he gave you and write, write, write. The words come out spontaneously, effortlessly, when you lift your head from the computer you realize it is almost evening. You stretch, turn off the pc, drink a glass of water, go to the bathroom and then leave.

Joel hasn't answered you, that's not like him, who knows maybe he's just really busy, you tell yourself.

As you're on your way home, you contact Kristen, you absolutely must warn her of your idea: you explain your plan and she tells you that she also has to actually go to a prayer meeting and she has to go to the very town where Joel is working. You explain that you are going to pretend to join them, but that you are actually going to Joel, you want to see him.

You check your phone, but Joel has not answered or displayed yet. You decide to call him, but his phone just rings. That's weird. You text him, but nothing, he doesn't answer or call you. You think about many things, then you decide that since he doesn't answer you, you need to leave, you need to see him now more than ever.

Convincing your mother was as easy as a glass of water, she wanted to talk to Kristen of course who confirmed your prayer meetings, provided many details of arrival and departure, and you, to reassure your mother, promised to call her as soon as you arrived, in the afternoon and evening. You prepare your small luggage and, since your mother won't let you drive, you leave with Kristen. The only problem is that Joel doesn't know you are coming and you don't know where to look for him.

Someone says that doing surprises is never a good thing because you inevitably get surprises, you try to chase that thought away, you don't want to believe that you are the one getting the surprise. You check your phone, Joel hasn't been in touch or answered your texts for almost twenty-four hours, and on the one hand it agitates you, but on the other it leads you to think that maybe he's just really busy.

While you're thinking that you've been foolish in leaving like that without informing him of your arrival, you remember the name of the company he works at and so your field of inquiry narrows; you're not alone, luckily you're accompanied by Kristen and a friend of hers, a guy named Xavier, a tall, muscular, blue-eyed, black-haired handsome guy. You think he's there with you because he cares about your friend, but this is your own thought, you may be wrong.

The places you see are one shabbier than the next, fortunately Xavier is with the two of you. When you arrive at another construction site, you realize you're in the right place, you ask for Joel and at that moment you are approached by a chick all dirty with a chipped protective helmet, she says your name, you turn around "D' you know me?" you ask her puzzled.

"It's like I know you, Joel talks about you all the time. You're here for him, aren't you?" her expression tense, focused "Come with me." she tells you, turning her back to the three of you.

"Uhm, can you wait for me? I'll let you know right away," you tell them.

When you turn around, you see the woman waiting for you with her hands in her uniform pockets, then noticing that you are joining her, she continues. She urges you to be careful several times, climbing flights of semi-dangerous stairs, when you almost reach the top, your heart in your throat with fear, but the idea of seeing him urges you on.

"Don't be frightened, dunno how much he's told you," she says as if you know what she's talking about "It's less worse than it looks." she stops on the landing "He's over there, he fell pretty bad, but other than a few cuts and bruises, he's okay."

You furrow your brow, the woman talks about it almost as if she said he scraped his knee, as if it were obvious. Well, maybe it is, but not to you.

"Didn't he tell you, did he?" she asks noticing your worried expression "You stubborn fool." she says in a sigh "Come." she adds giving you a little pat on your arm.

You follow her worriedly to a semi-closed door, "Wait." she tells you, then enters.

Your heart is pounding in your chest, that's why he didn't write or call you, but when did this happen? Yesterday? Last night? This morning? It doesn't matter when, but how he is, you hope with all your heart that nothing serious happened to him and that it's just a few scratches like the ones you've also seen before.

The door opens, the woman's eyes are downcast as she comes out, then she raises them to you, "He's in a bad mood, but I think with you he's…well, we gave him a painkiller." she tells you as she walks past you.

"But how did that happen?" you ask stopping her.

"That stubborn fellow last night at five o'clock had to knock off, but he wanted to finish a job upstairs at all costs, so he stayed with four other unconscious men like him until eight o'clock. By that time it's dark up here, very dark in spite of the lights, he slipped along with some equipment on the ramp leading upstairs." you pale "The cuts are mostly superficial, except for one on his side. A couple of friends working in the ER stitched him up."

"He needs to be taken to the hospital," you say seriously concerned.

She smiles bitterly and shakes her head "Since that episode happened to his daughter, Miller hasn't set foot in a hospital." the woman looks at you as if she has let a secret slip.

"What happened to his daughter?" you ask her hoping she will talk, but she shakes her head and replies "I can't be the one to tell you about it, he has to. If you're as important to him as it seems. . . well, he'll talk to you about it sooner or later." you lower your gaze "Now go to him."

You swallow, then turn away from the woman and enter, the room is semi-dark and cold, there are dozens of cabinets along two walls and then at the back a window through which only faint glimpses of light enter and a worn sofa on which Joel is lying. You leave your bag at the doorway dropping it and hurry next to him from the side, his face is swollen, you can clearly make out a cut at the level of his left cheekbone and lower lip, his arms are covered with large bloodstained bandages and his work uniform is half-open revealing a gauze on his side below which you imagine are the stitches the woman told you about.

You very gently caress the contour of his face, his face twitching in a small grimace perhaps from pain perhaps from discomfort you don't know, he opens his eyes and when he sees you he hints a pale smile "Is it the painkillers or are you really here?"

"Joel. . ." you tell him in a whisper moving closer to his face "I'm here."

"My beautiful. . . wonderful. . . writer" he mumbles raising an arm toward your face, when his hand brushes your face and then moves your hair you have chills, you place your hand on his, you feel it warm and ruined under your fingers "'m fine." he adds "Don't be impressed, I've been worse."

"Is that why you don't want me to see you naked?" you ask smiling and causing him to smile back.

"Guessed." he replies closing his eyes, for a while you don't speak again, you think he has fallen asleep, but then he says, "I missed feeling your breath against my skin."

"I missed you." you confess, squeezing his hand a little tighter and placing a kiss on the back of his hand "If something happened to you. . ." the words choke in your throat.

"'m right here, honey. 'm not going anywhere." he tells you reassuringly and stroking your cheek with his fingertips in a slow and extremely gentle gesture.

You place your head suddenly between arm and shoulder and he barely jerks, "Sorry!" you exclaim, but he holds you down "No, 's okay, just take it easy. Come on." he tells you moving a little further into the couch. You remain lying on that small and uncomfortable couch, you don't dare to move for fear of hurting him, he's the one looking for your hand, which he occasionally squeezes, but without making a sound. You wonder if he squeezes it to reassure you or because he feels pain.

It's your cell phone vibrating, interrupting that almost perfect silence, Kristen. You completely forgot about her! You reassure her that everything is fine and that you are with Joel; then, she reminds you to call your mother and tells you she is leaving.

Joel just turns his face toward yours, "You here alone?"

"No," you answer, shaking your head, "I'm with Kristen. She was waiting for me downstairs, you know, afraid that it wasn't the right construction site or that you weren't here," you explain to him.

"If you want to go with your friend, go. I think I'll stay a little longer like this and then go home. Join me later if you want." he tells you in a slightly dizzy voice.

"No." you tell him, "I came for you. If you want me, I'll stay with you," you tell him, looking at him.

He opens and closes his eyes, pulls you gently toward him making your head rest in the crook of his neck, "I want you all the time." he tells you "You know, I've been thinking about you all the time lately. There's not a moment in my day when my thoughts don't go to you." you lift your face slightly toward him "I have three words on the tip of my tongue, but dunno if it's fair to tell you." he adds before breathing deeply.

Your heart pounding in your chest, you close your eyes and inhale his scent.

"I have them too, from the bottom of my heart," you whisper, holding you to him and closing your eyes.

When Joel feels better, the two of you with Tess drive him home. You've reclined the passenger seat to make him lie down or almost lie down, you're sitting in the middle in the back seat. Tess doesn't talk much, she just casts brief glances at you from the rearview mirror and occasionally glances toward Joel who, however, does not look at you or at her.

The little house Joel rented here is much smaller than the one he has in town. In fact, it has a kitchenette, a bedroom and a bathroom. You help him shed his overalls, although he initially rebelled at being treated like he's ill, but you insisted. You sit him down on the worn-out couch in the kitchen and there for the first time you see his completely naked torso and it's huge, but what strikes you most besides his mighty are the many old and new cuts and scars that decorate his arms, his shoulder blades, his back. You are tempted to caress them all, but not now. You try to wash him as best you can without getting too close to the area where the stitches are. Your eyes constantly cross, when he sees you uncertain he reassures you with a look or a nod.

Once finished, you help him put on a clean T-shirt and invite him to stay there while you prepare a plate of pasta with some tomato sauce, again he rebels initially, but in the face of your firm tone he can only surrender. You hand him the plate by sitting next to him, eating in silence. From time to time he lays his head back against the backrest and closes his eyes holding his breath, "Does it hurt?" he shakes his head, but the expression on his face says otherwise "What can I do?" you ask him.

He turns to you, "You're here." he tells you causing you to miss a beat and smile. You enjoy each other's company, he would like to lean toward you and kiss you, but the stitches are pulling and he must not strain. You accompany him to bed, where he wears only a T-shirt and a pair of dark boxers. You swallow, if he wasn't like this. . .

You stop that thought from your mind, "Come." he says, inviting you to join him. You are wearing a shirt from a few years ago now ruined and three sizes larger, it's so big that it almost reaches your knee. You wear only that one to sleep in and briefs.

You lie down next to him, he's on his back, you can see him in the semi-darkness of the room, "Who was that woman at the construction site?" you ask, turning to him and gently laying a hand on his chest.

"Tess, a pain in the ass, but she's the only friend I have. The only one who has known me for years. She's a tough cookie."

"I saw. She seems cool," you say.

He nods, then turns to you, "Did you go to my place to write?"

"Once. I wrote. A lot. But without you, it's not the same." you say making squiggles on his chest with your index finger "I would have wanted you around, maybe hugging me and taking a look at what I was writing." you confide, he turns back to you "Next time.'' he tells you, giving you a kiss on your lips.

He takes your hand that was lying on his chest and squeezes it tightly intertwining his fingers with yours, he then runs his fingers down to your forearm and then looking you in the eyes he says "Come." you look at him puzzled "Come on me, I want to kiss you properly." he adds.

Your heart is pounding, you don't know how or, rather, you have a vague idea, but you don't know if it's right. He holds your hand as he guides you by making you lie completely on him. You feel even smaller in this position on him.

"If you have pain or discomfort, tell me," you tell him referring to the stitches, he shakes his head softly and then pulls you closer to him.

You are face to face, Joel barely leans toward you and captures your lips in a kiss that takes your breath away. You think back to how sick you were without him, you think back to the fear you had when you learned he was hurt, as Joel slips a hand through your hair crushing you even more against him.

I love you, you'd like to say, you'd like to let him know, as you too plunge your hands into his hair and your breaths grow shorter and shorter and merge into each other.

His arms held you close to him all night, you did nothing but exchange long caresses, glances and kisses. And that was enough for you. You wake up with your head on his chest, your hair partly on his chest and partly on your shoulders, you raise your head slowly and look at Joel's face. His lips parted, his hair tousled - and it's partly your fault too - a serene expression on his face, his wrinkles barely noticeable. The grazes and bruises clash so much with his handsome face.

You gently stroke his forehead to check that he doesn't have a fever or any other problems; thankfully, everything is fine. He's breathing normally and doing well. You check that the stitches are still intact, once you are satisfied that all is well, you caress his face, his features, you feel under your fingers his unshaven beard, caress in a gesture entirely new to you his neck, his Adam's apple. You see him wrinkle his nose and furrow his brow, then slowly open his eyes finding your eyes at once, you smile at him and he smiles back.

"G' morning." you say smily.

"'Morning." he says with his voice still slurred from sleep "How long have you been awake?"

"A little while." you reply, giving him a kiss on his sternum.

"And what were ya doing?" he asks looking at you with his dark brown eyes.

"I was watching you. Sorry. . . maybe that's creepy for you. . ." you are about to say, but he smiles so you stop.

"Remember when we slept together at my house?" you nod "I watched you sleep, too. You were like a magnet, I couldn't stop doing it." he continues cupping your cheek, you close your eyes for a moment surrendering to his touch and feeling your heart beating fast "You were. . . you're beautiful." he says gently stroking your lower lip with his thumb.

"I wish. . ." you are about to say something you never thought you would have the courage to say out loud considering your lack of knowledge on the subject, in fact to tell the truth you thought you would only ever write it down in your stories and instead. . .

"Would you like to?" he urges you, stroking your hair.

"I would like to. . ." you bite your lower lip softly "I'd like to make love with you." you say all in one breath, now you would like to hide from his huge dark eyes that seem to want to read you inside, you see him swallow and then he caresses the contour of your face with a finger "Sorry, maybe. . . uhm. . . you don't want to, you don't. . ." you don't know how to continue.

"Who told you I don't want to?" he tells you wrinkling his forehead.

You look at him incredulously almost, blinking several times unable to comment on his answer.

"I just don't think you're ready yet."

"I am." you reply, trying to sound firm and tame that unfamiliar fire inside you.

"We should wait a little longer. I don't want you to have even more pain than necessary." he says moving a strand of hair behind your ear "Y' know it's going to hurt the first time, right?" you nod "I don't want you to feel even more pain because I didn't prepare you properly." he adds.

You lower your gaze for a second, "By prepare well. . . what exactly do you mean?" you ask, showing him once again your inexperience.

"When I feel better, we'll talk about it," he replies.

Interrupting that almost awkward moment there's your phone vibrating.

MOM, it appears on the screen.

Shit, you totally forgot.

"Hello?" you say snapping to your phone answering immediately.

"Weren't you supposed to call me as soon as you got here, were you?" she scolds you.

"Sorry, you're right, while we got the room and then settled in, the meetings. . . sorry." you look toward Joel who scrutinizes you with an indecipherable look.

"Is Kristen with you?" she asks.

"She went downstairs, we have a meeting soon and she went to get croissants before to start, I just got out of the shower."

"All right. So, I won't keep you, have a good day. Call me tonight."

"Alright, bye." you say interrupting the call and placing your cell phone on the bedside table.

You sigh and then turn your gaze to Joel, who stares thoughtfully at the ceiling, you stroke his arm and he looks back at you "You had to tell more lies." it's not a question, it's a statement, and his tone of voice is very, very bitter.

"I didn't tell her about-"

"Us?" he asks you "She asked about you and John though!" he retorts, returning to staring at the ceiling with a disappointed, regretful air "Right?" he adds, turning back to you.

"I only told her about Jack because it would have been more acceptable to her," you tell him, but then you regret what you said because you told him that he's no good.

He looks at you, his expression is full of pain "Got it," he only says, but you don't think he understood what you really wanted to say "Can you help me up?" he says, you want to tell him no, but his tone doesn't admit any other answer but yes.

You get up from the bed and go to his side, put your hands on his shoulder blades as he, too, clutches your forearms to give himself that push he needs to sit up; you feel against your hair his warm breath get short, "How's it going sitting up?" you ask him.

"Fine." he answers you, but his tone is icy; he's angry about what you said.

You kneel down in front of him, "Joel," you say laying a hand on his knee, "I'm sorry if you misunderstood, but I didn't mean that you're not good enough. I didn't mean that, sorry if I misspoke. You are everything to me. I've had a lot of firsts with you, you're the only one I trust completely, I've never slept with anyone, I've never allowed anyone to touch me, I've never allowed anyone to get into my heart." you tell him looking straight into his eyes hoping this time not to be misunderstood.

He says nothing, looking down at you with his huge dark eyes, his breath short from the exertion he has just made, "If I should get too much," he says, but you shush him by stepping even closer and telling him, "I don't want to hear it, it won't happen."

"If it should," he resumes, "I want you to tell me and I won't see you again, I won't look for you, I won't put you in a position to lie to be with me, but to be with that other guy. . ."

"Joel," you interrupt him again, "I broke up with Jack. I don't want to be with him, I don't want him. There's only you." you tell him, feeling his breath stop for a moment as well.

"I can't be mad at you," he admits, stroking your lower lip again with a finger "Come," he says making you sit on his lap, "The truth is you drive me crazy." he tells you slipping a hand through your hair making your face come closer to his "I wish you were happy away from me, but I don't want you to go away. I'm so selfish. . ."

You kiss him fleetingly on the lips, "I don't want to be away from you. Got it?" you ask him sinking your hands into his curls, resting your forehead against his causing your breaths to mingle, "Please don't doubt how you feel about me," you tell him, "Because I have no doubt."

He captures your lips in a passionate kiss, your tongues dancing madly and your breaths growing shorter and shorter. He pushes you toward him, slipping his large, warm hands under your T-shirt and sitting you on his intimacy only covered by his boxers.

You never want to break this kiss, but you both need to catch your breath.

He caresses your arms, then looks long into your eyes as if to ask your permission, you nod giving him your silent consent, and he slips his hands under your T-shirt lifting it up and slipping it off with your help. You remain with your torso completely naked on him, feeling exposed and vulnerable, but it feels so erotic, so beautiful, more beautiful than you ever thought.

You thought that feeling his gaze on your chest, on you, would make you strongly uncomfortable, you thought you would even freeze, and instead in a rush, which you didn't think you had, you bring his hands to your bare breasts. You both groan at that contact, "Can I kiss it?" he asks you without breaking eye contact, "Yes." you reply in a trembling voice.

Feeling his lips on your nipple makes you gasp and at the same time close your eyes, you let yourself go completely to his caresses. Feeling his unshaven beard there, his hot breath, his tongue licking you gently and his lips sucking gently your breast, lead you to moan and gently bite your lower lip. You press his head against your chest, perhaps hurting him, but it is a sensation that sends you completely out of the ordinary.

"I'd stay kissing your breast for hours, 's perfect. You are perfect." he tells you, moving from one breast to the other with a little pop.

"J - Joel… please…" you find yourself pleading without even knowing exactly what the next step to take is, your vision blurs, you press yourself harder against him making your intimacies cling together as well, he gasps "Touch me." you say, he pulls his face away from your chest and you, in a bold move, get up from him slipping off your briefs and sit back down on him, on his now clearly evident prominence.

"You drive me crazy." he tells you taking a long moment to observe you, you are completely naked on top of him while he's still wearing his now bulky T-shirt and boxers.

"Take me." you tell him, bringing his hands to your hips.

He smiles as if you have said something particularly funny, "What?" you ask him blinking.

"What have you done with the sweet version of you?" he asks you barely clasping his hands on your hips, you smile at him giving him a kiss first on his lips and then moving down his neck, feeling him hold his breath.

"I'm still the same." you answer him between kisses "Sweet and insecure, but other times I know what I want and you know thanks to who?" you add going up to his chin giving him a very light bite "Thanks to you." you resume looking into his eyes.

"If I could move freely…" he tells you as a small grimace appears on his face, causing him to furrow his brow.

"What would you do?" you ask, looking at him with eyes full of curiosity and lust.

He swallows, moves a strand of your hair and then with his hands descends back down to your intimacy, wraps it completely in his hand and caresses your outer lips with a finger. You hold your breath tightening your grip on his shoulders, you look into his eyes as if seeking safety, he kisses the tip of your nose as he continues that exhausting caress. Your intimacy throbs, you feel yourself on fire as he continues those movements with a slow cadence making you want to be filled completely by his big finger.

"Joel…" you moan, pressing even harder against his chest eager for more clutch.

Finally, oh finally, his finger sinks inside you, inch by inch, it's a sensation that makes you hold your breath, but you deeply desired, he stays still for a while then slowly begins to pump in and out, the rhythm makes you moan and close your eyes. After a while he stops and you, with blurred vision, look at him puzzled, "Now I will insert another finger, if you have pain tell me and I will stop."

A second finger? It will never go in, or will it?

He must have noticed the bewilderment on your face because he reassures you, "Don't worry, I'll go very slowly. I won't do anything that will hurt you, okay?" you nod, "You tell me if you want me to stop, though," he reiterates.

A second finger enters you very, very slowly, sinking even more slowly than the first in your throbbing cunt. You feel your walls almost give way to his passage, you groan and close your eyes, it feels. . . strange, but so. . . you are at a loss for words. It's even better than you could have thought!

With the palm of his hand he rubs your clit sending more discharges of pure lust all along your body, you moan shamelessly rubbing yourself against him, "Joel. . . oh. . ." you can't speak, he lays his other hand at the base of your back stroking you with slow gestures, "I'm going to. . . I'm going to. . ."

"'s okay, just let go." his words are enough, his fingers continuing to move in and out of you at an ever-increasing pace, his hand caressing you is enough to make you close your eyes and let out a long resounding moan.

You let go, abandoning your head on his shoulder as he continues to pump gently still in and out of you, then he pulls his fingers away from you and you feel his hands encircling you and moving closer to your torso and then placing a kiss between your shoulder and your neck, "'s okay." he says then giving you another kiss on your neck and moving your hair causing you to shiver.

When you open your eyes again, you notice how visibly aroused he is, how his arousal is. . . big, very big, you have chills. You want to make love with him, but he will never fit that inside you.

He lays a kiss on your forehead, then you look up and meet his eyes, "We were fighting. . . and then. . ." he says with a smile, a smile you return, "then you realized the reason was futile." you complete. He nods, "You are. . ." he sighs noisily "so important to me, to my life, to my heart." he admits, caressing your face and scrutinizing you for a long time. You press yourself against him wrapping your arms around his neck, he groans. You sat on him completely, you also jerk and lower your gaze, "No." he says almost interpreting your look.

"Why don't you want me to touch you like you do with me?" you ask him intentionally settling better on him causing him to close his eyes and part his lips.

"I think you've already had another first for today. Let's take it slow." he says, "We'll do that too, honey, I promise." he says stroking your bare back in a slow motion that makes you close your eyes.

"I'd like to make you feel as good as you did me," you tell him looking into his eyes, "I don't want to touch you if you don't want to, but now it's your turn. You can't just worry about me, tell me what to do."

"It's… not…" he's about to complain, but you move a little awkwardly on his shaft and he finds himself swallowing, "it's. . . not necessary. . ."

"Joel!" you call back to him, "Really, tell me what to do." you add, this time intentionally touching his intimacy with yours.

"Fuck. . ." he groans closing his eyes, sighing noisily. He places his hands on your hips and moves you back and forth on his bulge, you both moan at that clutch, "Oh, fuck," he groans again gasping as you place your hands on his shoulders continuing to rub against him, "That's so. . . oh, baby, I. . ." his expression is tense, the vein on his neck clearly visible.

"Joel. . . don't stop." you moan as you move closer to him and give him kisses along the vein on his neck, you feel him gasp, move you on him a few more times and then he lets out a long resounding moan that deliciously fills your ears and leads you to encircle his neck with your arms as you too feel you have experienced a second orgasm just in rubbing against his manhood.

You stay like that against each other for a while longer, then you shift and slip on your briefs again, feel his burning gaze follow you, look up and meet his eyes, slip your T-shirt back on and put on a pair of shorts trying to ignore that almost clutching feeling at the pit of your stomach.

"You hungry?" you ask him.

He nods.

"Pancakes? Or ham and eggs?" you offer him.

"Coffee." he replies with a relaxed expression painted on his face.

"You can't have breakfast with just coffee, you know what happens? You get annoying." you look at him with an amused look making him visibly relax "Do you want to wash up first? Shall I give you a hand?"

He looks at you amused, "Nice try."

You blush, "I'm serious. . . I didn't mean anything."

"Then why are ya all flushed?" he asks relaxing completely.

"Because … I'm not used to these allusions, I always hated 'em. Gina, my friend, makes constant allusions to sex, and it always makes me uncomfortable." you confide to him.

"Why?" he asks cocking his head to one side with a small grimace twitching his face.

You sit down next to him, "I always saw sex as something awkward, strange. . . maybe because I didn't know my body, maybe because I never shared a truly intimate moment with another person, and maybe because I looked at sex as something deeply intimate and not to be talked about like that." you confide again "Do you think I'm strange?" you ask turning to him.

"Not at all. I'm a lucky old man." he says "Not everyone approaches sex immediately."

You nod, "Well, would you rather wash first - no innuendo - and then eat?"

"Okay, will you help me?" he asks looking to his side.

"Does it hurt?" you ask as you stand up and help him to his feet.

"A little, I think the painkillers wore off by now," he replies.

"Lean on me," you tell him, encircling his waist with your arm; he smiles at you, "Don't worry."

You help him get to the bathroom, then take off his T-shirt revealing himself in his might, he reveals to you once again his broad torso full of old and new scars and you again stand almost open-mouthed, you are very attracted to that strip of dark hair disappearing into his boxers. You look away feeling yourself flaming again.

"May I ask how you fell and what you were doing in the dark?" you ask as you wash his shoulders paying attention to the recent cuts and bruises present.

"Tess…" he replies with a sigh, shaking his head "she never shuts up." shortly after he adds "I heard that if we didn't complete the work on at least the upstairs by the beginning of next week, we won't going to get paid and I want to get paid because I busted my back on that fucking construction site!" he blurts out "And instead I put my foot wrong and fell with those tools. I'm an old fool." he exclaims with a sigh.

"You're not at all, you wanted to get paid for the hard work! But even if they don't have to pay you this job, though, you'll find another one," you tell him, passing the sponge between his neck and shoulders.

He shakes his head, "I don't know, the truth is maybe I should stop giving myself over to these things and do something else, even though this is what I am." he concludes by lowering his head.

"Joel," you say stopping washing him and squatting down next to him "don't talk like that about yourself, you're 47 years old it's true, but that doesn't mean you have to quit, it's true yours is a dangerous job, but you can still do it. Maybe not open construction sites, you could renovate single-story houses, you could do something a little less dangerous." you tell him abandoning the sponge and stroking his face "Look at me, please" he finally looks up "You're fine like this, you're perfect like this. It happens to everyone to fail, but if for every failure we said I'm not good enough I'd better give up, well we wouldn't live anymore!"

His formerly sad eyes become sweet and serene again, he reaches out a hand to you and caresses one cheek, this contact makes you close your eyes, you surrender to him, as always, whenever you are with him.

"You're sweet, I've always said so."

You smile looking into his eyes, "We need each other, did you see?"

He nods, "I'm taking your advice. Will you take one from me?" you look at him questioningly, "I read that there's in Seattle a contest for new writers, entries are due in June, why don't you sign up?"

A contest for new writers? Oh, it's always been your dream to sign up for a literary contest, but Seattle is so far away. . . so far away from him.

"I know that look," he says making you look up at him, "you don't have to say yes or no right away, think about it. I'd like to know and see you accomplished. I'd like to see a picture of you everywhere that says writer of the year." he says smiley and making you smile "Or maybe see you win the Pulitzer Prize." he adds making you smile nervously as your vision blurs "I don't want you to stay in that ugly, dreary little town, you have so much potential. It would be a shame to waste it over there in a bar or even in a library, I have nothing against people who do those jobs," he tells you, cupping your face and caressing your cheeks with his thumbs, "but I wouldn't want you to do that forever. You have a unique mind, you're brilliant, you're smart, you're too much to be confined only to yourself." you're crying, you can't hold back the tears anymore "Maybe someday someone might come and make some documentary about you and who knows they'll do some interviews around and they'll interview me too and I'll say I know her, I met the wonderful woman who's driving everybody crazy."

"Stop it," you tell him sobbing and hiding your face in your hands.

He calls you gently pulling you to him to hug you, you hide your face in the crook of his neck heedless of getting wet yourself. He holds you tightly to him, his hands caress your back, "'s okay, honey, 's okay." he says kissing your forehead, your cheek, your neck, your lips.

The truth is, you don't want to fulfill your dream if you know you have to leave him.

You surrender into his kisses, into his strong arms holding you to him trying to push that thought away as much as possible because, for you, it's not acceptable.

A/N Thank you for your support, for your likes and reblog, thank you, thank you, thank you ❤️If you enjoyed this, please consider reblogging and leaving comments 🫶 if you don't like it don't be rude and keep going. 😉 Please remember English is not my first language, so please be merciful! 🙏 The girl in the gif has the purpose to represent the situation only 🙂

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mybworlds · 15 days

Text

Chapter 12: A dog can’t survive in a pack of wolves

Pairing: The Hound x Sansa Stark

Summary: Arya, Sandor and Sansa reunite with their brother Robb and their mother Catelyn, but Sandor is imprisoned and Sansa begins to understand how she feels about him.

Chapter Warnings: language, attempted rape hint

Masterlist

Before to start... thank you to follow me, I appreciate it. This is a fairly long chapter, so take your time to read it and if you want to tell me what you think, thank you.

Thanks @vase-of-lilies for the banner

Arya and the Hound were waiting for her outside the inn, the musicians departed, and all that remained of the party was just a great silence interspersed with crying, shouting, and the occasional crash of a shattered plate. When Sansa met the Hound's gaze, she wondered if she should say something to him and what she should say to him, but then she thought that - if nothing happened between the two of them and it was all in her imagination - he would only taunt her not to mention Arya who would surely point at her as a fool accentuating the incident even more.

"Have you finished sleeping?" Arya complained, throwing a wood she had in her hands.

"Yes." Sansa Stark just replied.

"You know we don't have all day!" she added again.

"Sorry."

"Come on, princess, get on!" Arya taunted her.

Sansa did not reply, she simply mounted on Stranger, the Hound tried to do the same thing with Arya as well, but the little girl bit his hand so hard that even someone as strong as him gave up. Sansa suddenly felt uncomfortable: she wanted to talk to him about what had probably happened, but she did not have the courage.

The opportunity came when a few hours later Arya went off to attend to her needs.

Sandor made the little red-haired girl come down so that Stranger, too, could rest, drink and eat some fresh grass. She cleared her throat and approached Sandor. He took to rummaging in the grass, "You want to ask me something, right?" he asked her noticing how Sansa was torturing her hands.

"Yes, but how-?"

"How do I know you wanted to ask me something?" he said, "You are tense, even Stranger became so. What do you want to know? If you gave away your virtue with that musician?"

Was he teasing her? Sansa was not sure about that.

"N - no, I - I…"

"Come on, little bird. It's easier than you think!" he urged her.

He knew what question was pressing in Sansa Stark.

"Did it really happen?" she asked him.

Yes.

"What?" he continued.

"What happened tonight." she replied embarrassed to know, but at the same time curious to know the answer.

"What would you like to hear?" he asked staring at her.

She wished to have a confirmation of what happened.

"The truth." she replied, looking into his eyes.

Would she like?

"Do you really want to know?" he replied without giving her the answer she was looking for.

No, that she does not want to know, Sandor thought.

"I don't know," she answered truthfully.

He knew it, Sandor was convinced. The little girl had a title, she was so beautiful, she was too much for someone like him, and that kiss happened because surely Stark had mistaken him for that cheap storyteller, certainly not because she wanted to kiss him!

Without looking away he told her again, "Don't worry, none of what you imagine happened. You collapsed in my arms."

"Thank you for your answer." he nodded with a half snort and then lowered his head "Here, eat these! And stay here, I'm going to look for that little demon of your sister."

Sansa didn't know whether to be pleased or be disappointed about what she knew. She didn't speak about that anymore, she simply ate and found herself thinking that basically everything was back to the way it was: she - as a Lady - escorted by a brave man who kept her at a distance. Nothing had changed, she thought.

But in their souls - and their hearts - everything was changing.

When Arya returned, she read on her sister's face, but also on those of the man's burned face words to which neither wanted or knew how to give voice: the Hound's biting humor had given way to a dull silence from which none of the three wanted - or could - escape.

They waded a river, then another and then another again, up hills and through a thicket. By the time it was evening, the two Stark sisters were too tired to continue their journey, so Sandor chose to stop in a small clearing where he lit a fire for the two of them, even though he was only cursing his hatred of the fire and of the "bastard who made him like that."

Arya despite her physical exhaustion, did not fail to have harsh words toward the Hound calling him ugly and obscene, Sandor shook his head calling her brave for her such blunt words.

"There is no one worse than you," Arya commented after casting a glance toward her sister.

"You never knew my brother. Gregor once killed a man because he snored. One of his own." the Hound sneered, the burned half of his face tensing, distorting his mouth grotesquely.

"I know you're taking us back to King's Landing!" she blurted out.

"Fuck King's Landing and Joffrey and the Queen," spat the Hound, "That river was the Trident, little girl, not the Black Rapids. We should reach the King's Road in the morning. And after that we'll travel faster, maybe we can get ahead of your brother's army before they get to the Twin Towers. And I will be the one to deliver you back to your mother and brother. So stop berating and gnashing your teeth, I'm sick of it. Keep your mouth shut, do as I say, and maybe we'll make it in time to save your family's life."

"I can't tell if you're doing it for money or to screw my sister."

Sandor looked at her "Your language, little girl, is definitely obscene for a Lady!"

"I'm not a Lady." she replied "And then you of all people talk to me about obscene language? Really? You'd better shut up."

"I'm not going to cut you in two just because of your sister," he told her hoping to intimidate her, but Arya simply huffed and then walked away and fell asleep away from her sister, who became a stranger, and that filthy murderer.

The next day, as Sandor said, they reached the King's Road: they found themselves crossing immense devastated plains. On either side of the track, stretched miles and miles of blackened fields, of destroyed orchards in which tree stumps stretched upward similar to target poles for archers. Even the bridges had burned. This forced them to wander along the banks of the river in search of a ford.

"But what happened here?" asked Sansa, looking left and right.

"My damned fucking brother! I'll bet a wineskin on it!" the Hound asserted.

"They might see us if we follow the main road," objected Arya.

"True, but we're after your brother's army, remember? I think it's not long now."

"And how do you know that?" asked Arya.

"Do you see that dung? Whoever it is is not far away. It's still fresh." explained Sandor and then gave spurs and quickened Stranger's pace.

"It could be anyone, scarred!" exclaimed Arya offensively.

It seemed to Sansa that this time the Hound was wrong, there was no one but endless expanses of ash, burned houses and fields, not a trace of their brother, their mother or the Stark army.

Dusk soon came and Sansa began to lose hope of reaching Robb in time, Arya then was of little help to her because she was constantly barking at her and ranting against her overconfidence toward that Dog. She prayed and hoped that it was Arya in the wrong instead…just as she was about to call upon the gods, a howl was heard and the ears of the three wayfarers strained in the direction of that cry.

"Grey Wind." said Arya in a whisper that did not escape Sansa's notice "This time you may not be talking nonsense, Scarred." she added, turning toward the Hound.

Gray Wind, Robb's direwolf, appeared moments later followed by his master, a young brown-haired woman, his mother plus some knights Sansa had never seen before.

"SANSA! ARYA!" her mother shouted, going to her daughters and hugging them tightly.

"Mother." said Sansa squeezing her and closing her eyes. She was home. They did it.

The Hound stood by in silence.

A dog cannot survive in a wolf pack, at least not for long.

"How did you…?" asked Robb as he approached his sisters, smiling and hugging first Sansa and then lowering himself slightly so he could hold his other little sister as well.

"You are safe now." he said as he hugged Arya.

Arya looked at him, "We did it in time!"

"In time for what?" asked Robb squaring her sister and turning serious.

It was Sansa who took the floor "Robb, I must speak to you, but I must do…" she looked toward those knights whose names and lineage she ignored "…I must do when we are alone, I heard…things…serious." she told him looking straight into his eyes.

Her brother wrinkled his brow and narrowed his eyes as if puzzled, "You talking about…non-princess things?"

"It's a long story, hope I can tell you someday, but not today," Sansa stated in a grave tone.

"What is he doing here?" Robb spat noticing the Hound who remained motionless and silent until that moment "Did you come to spy on us and report everything to the Lannisters?"

"I piss on the Lannisters and their banner," Sandor answered him bluntly.

"Robb, it's because of him that Arya and I are here," Sansa explained while all eyes were focused on Sandor Clegane who did not know whether to draw his sword or look resigned "He left the Lannisters, he led me - he led us - all the way here so that we could be safe," Sansa continued.

"My beloved sister omitted, however, that he wants money," Arya added venomously.

"He shall have all the money he wants," Catelyn intervened, "She brought you home."

Sansa and Arya were led to a tent where they could wash, comb their hair and dress decently.

When Sansa finished dressing, she reached her brother: she had to talk to him and tell him what she heard. She had to do it right away.

"Sis, there are enough meat and vegetables over there, why are you here? Arya ran right away to eat!" her brother told her with a big smile.

"Yes…I know, but I have to tell you about what I heard. It's - it's not easy. I saw the Boltons' banner along with ours outside…"

"Yes, house Bolton sworn allegiance and is helping us."

"Robb, I heard from…some knights while I was traveling that the Boltons and Lannisters are conspiring against you and will use the wedding as…I don't know, but don't trust the Boltons and especially don't go to the Twin Towers, it's a trap."

"Sansa, are you okay? It's a crazy story you're telling me: a conspiracy. Why would the Boltons do that?" asked Robb.

"Do you remember what our father used to tell us about the Boltons? Do you remember what he told us about them? The Boltons thousands of years ago were allied with the Greystarks and together with them they rebelled against us Starks of Winterfell."

"I don't follow you. I mean, this happened thousands of years ago and Roose Bolton never gave us any reason to think of a conspiracy against our family."

"I know, I know it may sound crazy as I imagine I myself must sound crazy to you in talking to you about politics or power plays between the houses, but please, Robb, listen to me. It's the truth. And the truth sometimes hurts only because you don't really want to see it."

The brother stared wryly at his sister for a long time, "You've really changed, you know? You're a woman. And you've become … wise." he concluded, smiling at her "And about what you told me, as Jeyne says, the night brings counsel."

"And who is Jeyne?" asked Sansa.

"She is…my wife."

"What?" asked Sansa surprised, smiling at him.

Robb nodded smiling at her, "Yes, I got married."

"Is she of noble birth?"

"I love her." it was his brother's eloquent reply.

"Of course, love." it was her comment.

For the first time after talking to her brother, Sansa could catch her breath and allowed herself to ask him where the Hound was, Robb's face stiffened "Now he's kept prisoner."

"But he brought us safely here," Sansa replied contritely.

"Arya told me he beat you and even touched you, and then we don't forget his past, Sansa. The North remembers."

Sansa was speechless for a few moments, then exclaimed, "Arya lied! He ... didn't hurt me, he ... treated me with respect, defended me, cared for me, he cared for me when some men tried to.... take my -- I mean, Robb, Arya didn't tell the truth! Sandor Clegane is a rough man, sure, he uses a terrible language and bad manners, but he didn't lift a finger against me."

"Do you know what his brother did and does yet? Do you remember that he was King Joffrey's dog who killed our father?" Robb reminded her.

"What's going on?" asked a young woman entering the tent, the woman was the same one who Sansa saw near Robb a few hours earlier, heart-shaped face, brown ringlets and wide hips.

"Nothing, Jeyne," Robb replied, "My sister must be very tired."

"I'm tired yes, but that's not the problem," replied Sansa infuriatedly "Please, Robb, I swear to you by the Old and New gods that Sandor Clegane is a man who can be trusted and whom I trust completely."

"Sansa, we'll talk later again. Now go eat something, you must be exhausted." Robb said, his sister with a deeply displeased air left her brother's tent.

Sansa entered the tent where she found Arya intent on eating as much as she could; her sister didn't look up at Sansa, but she heard her coming despite the background hubbub.

"Have you spoken to Robb?" she asked her without looking away from his chicken leg.

"Yes." she answered her simply by looking toward his sister.

"And?" Arya asked again without yet looking at her older sister's face.

"He will make a decision tomorrow," the elder simply answered her.

"Good." Arya commented.

Sansa ate as little as nothing: she thought about what Arya reported to Robb; she took her revenge for her lie that had led to Mycah's death and the letting go of Nymeria. Arya hated her.

By now, even Sansa who was trying to see the good in her sister, she understood.

"You don't talk much, do you?" Arya continued.

"Neither do you, and that's something I really appreciate," Sansa replied, remembering those same words Sandor used it when they were in the woods when their journey was just begun.

"Won't you ask me why I let the Hound imprisoned?"

"You did it to punish me," Sansa replied without dignifying her with a glance.

"This journey opened your eyes - at least you are not the fool I remembered!"

"You, on the other hand, have changed: you became cruel." she commented and then stood up.

She wanted to see him.

She walked through the whole camp, many soldiers recognized her and made a half bow as she passed, others just looked at her, she saw the Stark's banner, then the Boltons', she passed many tents and many hearths still burning. The camp was over and she saw it, huge, it was almost totally dark the cage Sandor was in, there was only a flashlight planted on the ground near the front door.

There was no one there at that moment to stand guard, and so she ventured to call his name.

"Sandor."

Since when did calling him by his name cause her that heartbeat?

He lifted his head, the thick, uncombed mass of hair revealed the still intact part of his face, and the man's dark eyes spotted and recognized her despite the darkness "Little bird." he replied "Can you see?" he resumed, raising his hands and showing the chains on his wrists of his hands and on his feet, chains that held him against a trunk of a small tree placed in the center of the prison itself "What a jerk! I should have left you there and escaped at once!"

Sansa moved closer so she could stand in front of him "You were brave, even braver because you faced the wolves." she smiled weakly at him.

"A dog does not survive among wolves, and in fact look where I am!" he exclaimed.

"You're only here for a lie," Sansa revealed to him.

"It was that little bitch, wasn't it?" Sandor blurted out "If I catch her--" the chains bashed heavily slamming to the ground.

"Tomorrow you will be free. You will have your gold and. . . you will be able to ... l - leave, even if ..." she said, leaving the sentence hanging.

"Even if what?" he asked her.

She was uncertain for a few moments about the answer to give, then confided to him, "I'd like you to stay with us, with me. I know who you are, I know you. You are among the best men I have ever had by my side."

"Why? Why should I stay?" he asked looking into her eyes.

Sansa's heart was pounding in her chest, she didn't know how to tell him what she felt, she didn't know how to tell him that it was because of him that she became who she was, she didn't know how to tell him that - even though he was not the knight she once dreamed of - she loved him.

"Stay." was the only word that came from Sansa's lips.

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mybworlds · 19 days

Text

CHAPTER 11

status: ongoing

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

Masterlist

rating: 18+ explicit (minors, DNI)

Before to start... Thank you for your support, for your likes and reblog, thank you, thank you, thank you ❤️If you enjoyed this, please consider reblogging and leaving comments 🫶 if you don't like it don't be rude and keep going. 😉 Please remember English is not my first language, so please be merciful! 🙏

Thanks @vase-of-lilies for the banner.

Taglist: @harriedandharassed

The next day you wake up against the door of your room, you don't know what time it is or what day it is, you don't have your cell phone, you feel dazed, your eyes are swollen which you open with difficulty, you only see that it is daytime because the sunlight illuminates your room, you barely get up and go to the window.

People walk quietly down the street, there are small groups of kids walking here and there, a couple of couples holding hands, a father and daughter walking hand in hand. You rest your hands on the window feeling miserable and burdened, you place your forehead against the window and close your eyes, you think of Joel, who knows if he called, if he wrote to you!

“You don't want to fly away? Then fly away,” you think back to Joel's words.

You hope your mother didn't read or see his calls!

Luckily you have the block on your phone.

You open your eyes again, walk to the door, and make to open it, but it's still closed.

“Mom? Mom open it.”

“I don't deserve this,” you tell her, wanting to use a firm tone of voice, but your tone of voice is shaky.

You hear her footsteps, and this time after a few seconds the door opens, your mother is wearing a red coat, her hair is combed back, she is lightly made up, and she is still peering at you coldly.

She doesn't speak; she waits for you to do so.

“I don't know what to do with you anymore.” she says in a defeated tone of voice “I thought making you attend my prayer group, making you take music lessons would make you better than your father, and instead…” she leaves the sentence hanging.

“Excuse me if I'm not the daughter you wish,” you tell her.

When she wants to hurt you, she compares you to your father.

You don't know exactly what he did, but it is certainly something very serious. Or so you have always guessed from her words and the tone she uses when she mentions about him.

Usually when she compare you to the other parent, you always told her what can I do to change your mind, she told you that you should study and try harder, be more obedient, and after a few weeks, serenity returned between the two of you because you got back in line, in her lines. Today, you don't want to say that statement anymore. It is not fair that everything you want is constantly repressed and belittled. It is not fair that she prevents you from seeing someone. You cannot allow that.

You don't want to get Joel in trouble, you can't.

Your mother sighs, then shakes her head.

“So who was the man Mrs. Bixby saw?” she asks again.

“His name is Jack.” you answer her “I met him when I was waiting for you at the end of my music class, I had finished a few minutes earlier and went into a bar to have a glass of water.” you tell her.

“We're getting somewhere.” she says hearing you confess “How long have you been seeing him? Have you seen him again? What does he do?” she begins with her many questions.

“Since a couple of months, Jack studies psychology. We've always seen each other in public places like the library, restaurant, diner, never here or at his home. Nothing has ever happened, if that's what you care to know,” you say finding a firmer tone of voice.

If she knew what you do with Joel.

“I'd like to meet him,” she says.

“Mom it's a little early, we don't know each other yet to have him come here to the house,” you try to dissuade her.

“I insist!”

You lower your head, you don't have a choice. By now you have to do this or your mother would start again and forbid you any kind of outing.

“All right,” you reply not at all enthusiastically.

Instead, she seems to visibly calm down, “Fine,” she says.

“Where are you going?” you ask her.

“I go to church.” she replies and then she turns her back on you, “Ah, your damn cell phone has been ringing nonstop!” she exclaims.

You leave and make to go to the kitchen to get it back, but your mother once again stops you with her words “I saw there are messages from your friends and at least two from Joel Miller. None from Jack. It's kind of strange that he's not looking for you, isn't it?” she says making you freeze.

“We had a fight two nights ago,” you reply, shrugging your shoulders.

“Well, I'm going then.”

“Joel, when are you coming?” you ask him not answering his question using an alarmed tone.

You nod, when you hear the door close you resume breathing normally and run to unlock your cell phone. You call Joel immediately.

“Baby, finally!” he exclaims in an alarmed tone “I was scared for you. You okay?” he asks you.

“I'm home. D' ya wanna me to pick you up?” he asks you in the same tone.

“No. Um, listen,” you check the door, “my mother suspects something. I can't make you come down here to me anymore, I'll come to you. I'll wait for her to go to the hospital tonight and then I'll sneak out. Okay?”

The door opens and you immediately close the phone pretending you are going to get some cookies for breakfast. Your mother is back, she forgot something she tells you and then goes out again. You breathe a huge sigh of relief, then go back to look at your phone and text Joel “Sorry I ended the call, I couldn't talk. I wish I didn't have to force you to go through this… “

Joel calls you back, you answer.

“You're going to tell me everythin' tonight. 7 o'clock 's okay for you?” he tells you.

If you could, you'd run straight to him.

“Yes. See you tonight,” you tell him, “Bye.”

“Miller careful with that or you'll end up without something very dear to you!” exclaims his colleague, the only female presence on the site, the only friend Joel has and who knows all about you and who has eagerly seen your presence in his friend's life.

Her name is Tess, she pats Joel's shoulders to call him to attention, he looks up and she smiles at him.

“Hey.” Joel greets her thoughtfully, the man is splitting bricks, but the cuts are inaccurate.

Tess stays behind him, “What?” asks Joel.

“Those bricks need to be split four inches farther apart, and then the angle is wrong.” Joel snorts, “What's the matter, Miller?”

“If you want to talk, I'm here,” Tess says again, lighting a cigarette.

“Nothin'.” his tone does not convince Tess, who grabs a rickety chair and sits down. She says nothing, just observes Joel continuing that wrong slanted cut.

Joel snorts, actually you are his fixed thought, at first he was attracted to you because of your sweetness and great insecurity towards the world, towards everything that was unknown to you and he couldn't help but think of your eyes and its endless expressions of astonishment, joy, fear, but also desire and love as you you know each other. When you met, he would have thought anything but to think so much about someone after what had happened to his daughter Sarah and then with his partner! Indeed, when his brother Tommy had asked him to tell his pupil that there would be no more meetings, he never thought he would meet a sweet, pure and fragile girl like you, never thought he would find himself captivated by you, never.

Joel gives her a sidelong glance, “There's not much to say.” Joel picks up the hammer breaking another block.

“Is it about her, isn't it?” she asks.

Joel nods pronouncing your name in a whisper with such delicacy and sweetness as if you were the most precious gem in the world to him.

“I would like to be strong for both of us,” Joel says, throwing the hammer just farther, “but the truth is that knowin' her in danger, in this state of duress, hurts me. What I want is to hold her in my arms and tell her that I will always keep her safe with me.”

Joel quickly realizes, however, that this is not possible. You might have been thrilled about it, but while he himself would have been very happy about it, he still has a lot of doubts about how right it is to bond you with someone like him.

“Did you tell her about Jess?” Tess asks him, taking a puff of her cigarette.

“Yes.” Joel replies immediately, moving away from there and toward the scaffold. Tess follows him in a half-step, “I told her in a nutshell that it didn't end in the best way between us.”

“Did you also tell her she's around and from time to time you see her?” she asks him, resting her forearms on the scaffold's balustrade. Joel gives her a long, penetrating look that counts as an answer, which is no.

Joel still cannot talk about her unfiltered because to do so would mean talking about Sarah, and Sarah is a chapter of his life that he does not want to share with anyone. Unless he has to.

“I know you were really bad first about Sarah and then about Jess, but maybe with her you could-”

“Tess, do you mind if we don't talk about those years of my life at all,” the tone of his voice does not allow for different replies.

“All right.” Tess says “I had felt that you cared particularly for her.”

Joel sighs heavily. He is trying to remember why he still addresses the woman. At that moment it escapes him.

“Yes.”

“If it was a sex thing, I wouldn't have told you to talk to her about who-you-know.” she adds “But from what I understand it's more than that.” the man looks at her with an enigmatic gaze and Tess's eyes go wide “You haven't yet-- oh my God, then this is a serious thing!” she exclaims with a half-smile “And who would have expected old Miller to fall in love again!” she exclaims again patting the man's shoulder who rolls his eyes shaking his head.

Joel looks toward the buildings still under construction, he doesn't like to talk about his feelings, he was never good at expressing them if the situation was clear. Let alone today with you who are so much younger than him, you are absolutely inexperienced and naive! Nonetheless, Joel can't do without you or think about you.

Evening comes and Joel is in great apprehension about you: your voice, your tone were strongly cracked, your words had put him in a state of great agitation.

He has tidied up the house at the least, ordered Italian food, and he's waiting for you with great impatience.

When you knock on the door, he immediately runs to open it. Joel does not even have time to greet you, that you pounce on him, encircling his neck with your arms and burying your head in the crook of his neck. Joel wraps both arms around you and holds you tightly to him, closing his eyes.

“Baby.” he whispers in your ear then kissing one forehead “You're safe.” he tells you increasing his grip even more and then sinking a hand into your hair “My poor baby.” he repeats, you can't speak, you feel overwhelmed, you just stay in that position and inhale his strong scent.

You have, the two of you have, chills.

You can't separate yourself from that embrace, you don't know what to say to each other, but maybe that embrace is worth more than many words.

You eat in silence and only afterwards, when you are on the couch, you lying with your head on his thighs and him gently stroking your hair, you tell him what happened with your mother, you tell him that you are afraid to be there, that you would like to get out of there, to run away. You've always felt this state of oppression, but never as tightly as the night before.

“Please go away. You can come to me,” he tells you.

You look at him with a surprised look, you had thought about your friends, but certainly not him.

“Joel, I…”

“Think about it, but I don't want to know you're in danger. If something happened to you--” you raise your head and stand beside him "I could never forgive myself."

“Sssh,” you say as you sit on his lap, resting a finger on his lips, “I'm here now.”

He gently kisses your fingertip making your skin crawl, you smile at him and then pounce on his lips.

“I would stay like this all day,” you confess to him, afraid to put your foot out the door of his house because you know that once you are out everything will go back to the way it was before and you will go back to being the one forced to act a certain way, to be a certain way. You don't want to, you don't want to. But you have to.

Spending the night in his bed gave you back an ounce of courage that your mother had previously deprived you of, breathing in his strong scent relaxes you, being hugged by him all night long makes you feel good and peaceful all of a sudden. In the morning you wake up like this still hugging each other: you have your back to him, he still holds you tightly to him, you open your eyes, your eyes still pinch a little from the loud crying of the night before, but you feel better already. You feel him moving just behind you, mumbling some unintelligible words, and you find yourself smiling and turning slowly toward him with your face and then your torso. You watch, thanks to the first light of dawn filtering through his bedroom window, his face still stretched out, his lips parted, his beard growing.

You find him wonderful.

You don't want to disturb him, but you can't help the urge to caress him. You gently stroke with your fingertip the contour of his face, his angular nose, the barely noticeable wrinkle between his eyebrows, his forehead, his beard, then his lips.

Joel begins to wake up, smiling and muttering “Gmrning.” you find yourself smiling back before returning his greeting only to find your eyes in each other's. Those sweet chocolate eyes settle on you, he smiles at you and then holds you tightly to him again, you find yourself smiling at each other and exchanging sweet kisses, gently caressing each other.

“I'm here for you. If that's what you wish…” he smiles at you, caressing your face this time with a finger "you will be granted." he says placing a finger on your lips, you gently press your lips against his fingertip without looking away from his eyes. You love to see how the expression in his eyes changes when you do something especially good for him, how his eyes seem to get bigger and darker. Which happens even now.

“Joel…” you say without finish your sentence.

He whispers your name, he pronounce it with desire.

You bridge that very short distance that separates you at once, your lips rest against each other, they open in unison, and your tongues dance at first softly then almost wildly, it is a kiss that takes your breath away.

You wish he would touch you, you wish he would do more-- but you feel it, Joel is like he is always holding back with you. Maybe it's you who has to help him.

You take his hand and bring it to your breast, you know you will drive him crazy. Indeed, his breathing becomes shorter and you find yourself smiling into the kiss. Glad to have provoked a reaction in him.

“Little girl…” he says to your lips, his tone of voice should be a sort of a warning or do you imagine that's what he means using that tone, but you deliberately ignore his tone and instead you look him in the eyes for a long time before saying, “Will you teach me to make you feel as good as you did with me?”

His eyes become if possible even darker, “No.” he answers you dryly “Not yet. You're not ready.” he adds, swallowing.

“You're afraid.” you say moving away from him, he turns supine “You're afraid to cross the line with me, aren't you?” you insist, he looks at you “Well, we've already crossed it. I touch myself because of you, if I have to say it!” you add feeling the heat on your cheeks "You make me feel so good, why can't I do it with you too?" he doesn't answer you, he looks at the ceiling.

You also turn in a supine position, you look away. You don't say anything, you don't know what to say. If he doesn't want to, you cannot make him.

“You don't trust me.” you say after what to you seems like hours of silence, you turn completely away “All right.” you add feeling a knot in your throat, you first feel him move to the other side of the bed then you feel a hand caressing your side and finally you feel a strand of hair move and a kiss behind your ear. You shiver, wanting to hold the point, but you already know you won't last much longer, not with him kissing that sensitive portion of your skin and then moving down to kiss along your neck.

More shivers run down your spine as his unshaven beard brushes against your neck, you turn toward him finding yourself lost in a kiss again. He almost pulls you toward him, you groan from surprise and also from the arousal that is spreading inside you and spreads even more as he towers over you completely. He breaks the kiss and you find your eyes meeting. His hot breath breaks against you and you find yourself closing your eyes.

Like other times, anything could happen out there, but if you are with him you really don't care.

He places a kiss on the tip of your nose and you smile. You smile again.

“D' you wanna try somethin' new?” he asks.

You open your eyes nodding.

He sits in the middle of the bed, you also make to sit, but he shakes his head saying, “Stay down and lemme do it. Honey, if you feel uncomfortable, if you have any pain, stop me right now, okay?”

“What is this about?” you ask him leaning on your forearms.

He looks at you, “I want to touch that your tight little hole with my fingers.”

You flush more at his dirty tone of voice than at what he said, “Haven't you already done that?” you ask him uncertainly.

“Not exactly.” you look at him questioningly “I've only touched a small part of you, I'd like to go deeper.” you swallow “If you don't wanna to-”

“No, no!” you quickly interrupt him “All right. What should I do?” you ask him.

He leans toward you caging you in his arms, he lays a quick kiss on your lips and then returns to sit in the middle of the bed, “Can I take 'em off?”

You nod as he lays his hands on the elastic of your shorts, looks you once more in the eyes as if seeking your consent once more, consent which comes immediately by just raising your pelvis allowing him to remove your shorts and briefs in one move, remaining completely naked from the waist down.

It's not the first time he touches you, but this time you are completely exposed to his sight and it sends more discharges of arousal all along your body especially noticing his equally lust-filled gaze.

“Are you aroused yet?” he asks you.

He pounces on your lips almost sucking your lips and tongue together, you groan in surprise at that kiss so different from the others, “You are beautiful.” you tell him through your lips feeling him smile and looking into your eyes.

He grazes your nose with the tip of his nose, “You are perfect, baby.” he comments leaving a trail of moist kisses along the line of your jaw and then down your neck.

You drop your head back, blissfully surrendering to his lips and then to his hands gently resting on your breasts, moaning softly as you close your eyes.

You nod, “Yes.”

“Lemme see.” he says and then caresses with his left hand your thigh, then your inner thigh and finally there, your intimacy, you squeeze your eyes shut, he hasn't touched you yet and you already feel those familiar tremors inside you.

“You're already soaked.” he says, you open your eyes and look at him questioningly, “Is that wrong?” you ask him puzzled.

“Absolutely not.” he replies running a finger along your intimacy causing you to hold your breath “It means you're already ready.” he explains repeating the same motion back and forth, you find yourself biting your lower lip and clenching your toes feeling an ever-increasing heat spreading to your lower abdomen.

“R - ready for what?” you ask tremblingly, but curious.

“For me.” he answers you with lust-filled eyes as he continues that precise, slow movement “Relax, don't be afraid.” he tells you noticing your tense expression.

“I am not afraid.” you reply looking into his eyes, and it's true you know that whatever he will do, it won't hurt you. You know that you are safe with him and that you would do anything with him.

“Now I'm going to insert my finger inside your cunt,” you swallow “I'm going to do it very slowly, if you have pain or feel uncomfortable, tell me and I'll stop.” he says scrutinizing your face carefully, his gaze tense, focused, full of desire. You nod barely trembling with desire.

Slowly he slides inside you first just the calloused fingertip as you almost jerk to feel part of his finger inside your taut and tender flesh, you tremble with desire, a boiling desire that reverberates in every cell of your body; he stays like this for a while then slides the phalanx inside you, you drop your head on the pillow feeling you are in a world out of the ordinary, you find yourself spreading your lips wide as if searching for oxygen, moaning softly.

“Jus' a lil more.” he warns you before inserting the phalanx inside you. You clench the blankets in the fist of your hands and moan softly, “You're so excited, my baby.” you feel him kiss you on the lips, but you can't kiss him back, you're seeing stars behind your eyelids, it's indescribable.

Then, he sinks inside you again and you open your eyes suddenly, you look down and seeing his finger fully sinked inside you is an even more arousing sensation, feeling his long, thick finger reach such intimate parts of you makes you wet even more “How's it goin'?” he asks you.

Your vision is almost blurred, you are at a loss for words, you just nod.

He leans over to you and kisses you gently on the lips, slowly lets his finger out inside you and this hollow feeling makes you moan into his mouth, then slowly slips his finger back into you making you moan again. He repeats this movement with a slow rhythm that makes the desire inside you grow faster and faster. You moan surrendering to the pleasure he is giving you with that relentless rhythm of his, lips parted and completely exposed to him. Then, with a confident movement, Joel also touches your throbbing center sending you more discharges of pure lust, you no longer know what to focus on, whether on his finger touching hitherto unexplored areas of you or on the palm of his hand caressing your clit.

Hearing you moan against him makes him instinctively close his eyes and breathe deeply, he feels the contractions of your next climax squeeze his finger and the lust spreads strong inside him, he would have liked to make you cum in his mouth or around his cock, but he still has to restrain himself.

“How d' ya feel?” he asks after a couple of minutes of silence, giving you a cloud-light kiss on your neck as the waves of climax slowly leave you.

Your climax explodes violently causing you to gasp and clench the blankets even more tightly in your fist. The room suddenly becomes silent.

There is only your shortness of breath.

“Fine.” you reply, still nodding with your eyes closed.

He slowly kisses your forehead, then your cheek and finally your lips. You open your eyes and exchange a sweet smile.

“Would you like some breakfast?” you ask him after a while.

“Pancakes?” he offers.

You smile, “That'd be perfect.”

He nods chewing, “And that is?”

You slip back into your briefs and shorts and go downstairs to make breakfast.

You found out one more thing about him: Joel is a disaster in the kitchen, first he forgot to add milk to the mixture, then he dropped an egg on the floor in short you did nothing but laugh during this rocambolic breakfast preparation.

You manage after almost an hour to sit at his kitchen worktop eating your pancakes, you add some honey, raspberries and blueberries. You eat in silence, only exchanging long glances, then after you bite into the last piece, you tell him, “I've been thinking about the title of my story.”

“Bittersweet.” you reply, smiling at him.

You see him swallow, “What's it about?” he asks you.

“It's the story of a young woman and her music teacher, a man who is apparently an asshole, actually very sweet and who will help his student to become more and more confident,” you tell him in outline, turning to face him.

He smiles conspiratorially, “That reminds me of somethin'.”

“Huh, yeah!” you exclaim, returning that look and his smile.

“D' you wanna start writing now?” he asks you.

“Do you mind?” you ask him.

He turns to you, then gently taking your chin between his fingers he says, “If you ask me with these sweet eyes, I can't say no.” you lower your gaze for a moment, “Well, I'll take the opportunity to take a shower and then put up a couple of shelves in the living room. You set up wherever you like, here, in the study above, in the bedroom, wherever you like.”

What did you do to deserve such a man?

“Do you mind if I sit on the couch in the living room?” you ask him, this is his house and it seems more than fair to ask his permission before moving anywhere you want.

He leans toward you giving you a sweet kiss on the lips, “Wherever you want.” you smile, then lays his forehead against yours and takes his leave. He sees you turn on the computer, cross your legs and lay the laptop on your lap. He sees you open the program to write, Joel has never understood much about computers and stuff like that, he has always been an analog guy, always loved manual work.

Joel goes into his bedroom and lies down on the bed, feeling alive. He is feeling good for the first time in a long time, living the little moments of everyday life with you makes him feel good, alive and special. He didn't believe that someone like him after all he has experienced could again hold someone in his arms who makes him feel welcomed, loved, who tries to make him feel good, it is a wonderful feeling.

He breath deeply, the scent of you is still strong in his room.

Joel was about to give in earlier when you had asked him to pleasure him, was about to say okay, but that wouldn't have been right. Joel becomes more and more aware that yours is not just a physical attraction, yes of course there is that too. Yet when you are apart he cannot help but think of your scent, your eyes, your smile, your sweetness, your need to be welcomed, cuddled, loved.

“Fuck…” he says, resting his forehead against the shower wall.

He feels his cock throbbing at the thought of your narrowed eyes and wide-open mouth, as he was pleasuring you with his fingers for the first time, the memory of you so tight and wet causes him another jolt. He undresses completely and goes to the shower, he opens the water jet and finds himself thinking that he would love to have you here with him, he imagines what he would do if you were there together. He'd press you against the shower wall and you'd look at him with those wide eyes of yours in surprise, he'd kiss your neck and you'd close your eyes, he'd press himself against you and kiss every inch of your body, he'd feel you tense up and beg for more.

How he would love to have and give more!

He wraps his taut erection in his fist, the roar of the water covers his moans, his heavy breathing, the image of you clinging to him, your arms encircling his neck, he imagines you giving him pleasure. He grits his teeth to disguise the long moan that comes out of his mouth as streams of his hot seed fall partly into his fist and partly against the shower wall.

He washes himself thoroughly, then gets out of the shower. He dries off, puts on old jeans and a black T-shirt he usually uses to do chores around the house, and comes downstairs. He sees you drinking a glass of water in the kitchen, he reaches you out and he wraps his arms around you, and you smile sweetly at him, “How's the writing of your masterpiece goin'?” he asks.

“Don't tease me now,” you reply to him, setting the glass down in the sink.

“I'm not teasing you.” he says giving you a kiss under your ear “If 's something of yours, it's certainly unique. Beautiful. To me, a masterpiece.” you turn to him finding eyes in each other's eyes, he places a kiss on the tip of your nose, you chuckle "I hope everyone gets it, that you can work up the courage to sign up for some classes and they'll notice you, that they can read you sooner or later." he confides.

“Then I wouldn't be here with you anymore,” you say in a huff that makes the two of you feel sick.

Joel lays his hands on your forearms, he strokes you gently, then slides his hands behind your back, “I don't wanna you to be confined here. In this small town. You deserve places like Seattle, Los Angeles, New York, or even Europe. You deserve the world. I wish you could see all the wonders there are,” he tells you.

“You are all the wonder I want in my life,” you tell him.

“Oh, baby.” he says holding you in his arms and placing kisses on your cheek and forehead “You're so sweet, so…” he dips his nose into your hair and you close your eyes, you don't care what he wanted to add, the important thing is what you told him. At the moment you like to write, but you don't want to get away from him, you couldn't stand a world where he is not there. For you it would be intolerable.

34 notes · View notes

mybworlds · 23 days

Text

Chapter 3: A Cloud of Pleasure

Pairing: joel miller x f!reader (no use of Y/N) | Rating: 18+ Minors DNI | W.C.: 2.8k

Summary: Your life sounds perfect: you live with a perfect man, you live in your dream house, you do the job you love, you don't miss anything, except love and passion.

Before to leave, thank you very much for your silent support ❤️

Masterlist

follow @mybworlds and turn on notifications to get notified when I post new fics

Thx for the dividers @saradika-graphics

Taglist @harriedandharassed

The temperature has dropped quite a bit, you're cold, so you shrug your shoulders as you stand at one of the hotel tables having breakfast with the man you ran away from last night. Joel wanders his gaze from your eyes to your hands to the little balcony overlooking the beach, perhaps also uncertain what to do. You are joined by a waiter who disposes of your dishes, “Are you storm-locked too?”

“Yes,” the two of you reply in chorus and then look into each other's eyes for a long silent moment.

“I'm afraid it lasts a while,” the waiter adds again, shaking his head.

“A half hour?” you ask hoping to hear a yes.

“Maybe yes or maybe the whole day, we'll see.” replies the man again.

“If I need to change, can I go back to the room?” you ask again.

“I don't know, either they let you use the changing room or maybe yes. Either way, talk to the attendant at the front desk.”

“Thank you.” you reply, the man leaves and you find Joel's eyes on you again “What?”

“You're afraid to be with me.” he says narrowing his eyes, and it's not a question his.

“No, but what-”

“From the first moment we saw each other in your store,” he continues, “you had that reaction. I'd like to understand why, if I gave you reason to be afraid of me, if I said or did anything.”

“No,” you're the one who interrupts him this time, “it's not you.” you sigh, you already know you're going to regret saying those words, but you have to, it's not fair for him to think there's something wrong with him “It's me being afraid of what I can do.” you blurt it out.

Joel doesn't comment right away, he wanders his gaze from your face to your figure a couple of times, then looks up at you again “What could you do?” he repeats “Are you a serial killer?” he adds barely holding back a smile, a smile escapes you too “No, seriously, what are you afraid of?”

You know you will regret saying those words even more than the previous ones, but by now you are on a road with no turning back, “I immediately felt a strong…uhm…a strong…” you scratch your forehead in a nervous gesture as he takes your hand interrupting that gesture and wrapping it completely, it is so warm and big, you have palpitations and you even feel like you are covered in a cold sweat.

“'s that why you stopped me last night?” he asks you, you nod almost unable to sustain his gaze, you should tell him that you are engaged for ten years to a wonderful man, but for some strange reason, it's a thought that doesn't cross your mind “I got it, you know. I realized it even last night during the wedding party that you are a person who doesn't relax easily, who is afraid to experience the emotions to the fullest.” your breath becomes short "Let go," he adds, as he moves closer to you placing a hand in your hair and very slowly bringing his lips closer to yours, you hold your breath almost still resisting that contact, ”Let go.“ he says again, his warm breath against your lips breaks your ability to resist because you are the one who shortens the distance and places your lips on his, initially it is a chaste kiss lips against lips and nothing else, then things change when he caresses your lower lip with his tongue making you moan "Honey," he murmurs almost on the lips barely tightening his grip on some strands of your hair and making your faces come even closer together if possible. Everything that happens next is an escalation that you can no longer control or stop: Joel has persuaded the attendant to have you use a room because you're not feeling very well, or at least that was the excuse, you're actually perfectly fine, you are shaking.

You're trembling from the excitement of being in Joel's arms, of being able to be his, of being in a situation you absolutely shouldn't be in.

You are squeezed between the bed and Joel who has you caged in his arms, he kisses you very slowly first on the lips, then along your jaw, up to your earlobe, and vice versa, you have your hands resting on his back savoring this attention he is giving you with your eyes closed and your lips parted. Lightning flashes light up the room from time to time while he grabs in one hand a strand of your hair and pulls it slightly so that you bend your head to the side and expose your neck, his soft lips graze your skin as his beard teases it.

“Joel?” you call him, laying your hands along his sides.

“Hmm?” he mumbles giving a kiss on your neck and then looking into your eyes.

“Can I take this off?” you ask him taking his shirt between the fists of your hands.

“So needy.” he says giving you a soft kiss on your lips and then sits down on his knees thus making you sit down too so that you are facing each other, he raises his arms and you slip off his shirt making him reveal himself in all his mighty, you find yourself swallowing in observing his shoulders, his broad chest and the strip of dark hair disappearing in his pants, “You like what you see? “ he teases you by placing one hand behind the back of your neck and the other at the level of your breasts before kissing you.

You lace your hands behind his neck as you feel his hands fumbling with your shirt buttons, he opens it completely and only then does he pull his lips away from yours, “Fuck,” he murmurs licking his lips as he slides your garment off your shoulders, he lays his lips on your neck making you lie back against the mattress, “You have the softest skin, baby,” he continues by running his lips down your collarbones, then on your still covered breasts. You sigh closing and opening your eyes at his caresses and his lips lapping at your still covered breasts, you moan softly opening your legs and bending them so that he draws them even closer to you, “So needy,” he repeats to you and then moving just away from your breasts and unfastening your bra. Your nipples immediately harden on contact with the cold air of the room and in front of his gaze. You swallow in front of his dark eyes full of lust staring at your breasts before he bolts up and takes a nipple between his lips.

“Fuck,” you groan, abandoning your head to the side and closing your eyes in arousal as you feel his tongue gently pinch now your nipple, which hardens more and more in the face of his attentions, you thread your hand through his hair as his tongue continues to tease you relentlessly as he passes from one breast to the other. You arch your back repeatedly, it is wonderful.

“You really needed care and attention,” he teases you when he lets go of your other nipple as well. You are in a pitiful state, you are already horny as hell and you already wished he was inside you thrusting until you forgot even who you are but instead he is still on you playing with you “Lost your tongue?” he teases you with a half smile.

“No,” you groan breathlessly “I'm waiting for you to continue.” you tease him in turn returning his smile and kissing him yourself this time, you take advantage of his pause to reverse positions and sit on him where you feel his erection, you tease him a little by rocking you back and forth to grind your center on his bulge and this makes the two of you hold your breaths, you smile “Lost your tongue now?” you ask him approaching his face and kissing him hard. His hands travel down your back caressing you and then return to your breasts caressing them a little less gently this time, but that's okay, you like that way too.

In the meantime your hands travel along his chest while your lips are on his flushed neck with the veins clearly evident, then you go down to kiss his collarbones and kiss his breasts first one and then the other, you feel his gaze on you, you look up at him “Does it bother you?” you ask him stopping for a moment.

“No, but no one had…don' mind, go on.” he replies, as you again gently bring your lips close to his breasts feeling him hold his breath and then release it heavily, your lips then continue until they reach the waistband of his pants, you pull your lips away from him and unfasten the waistband looking him in the eyes, you lower his pants and boxers together releasing his massive arousal that rests on his soft stomach “You like what you see? “ he asks you again caressing one cheek and drawing you to him to kiss you, it's a gentle kiss now, slow and his hands rest on your hips still covered by your pants, "Stop bragging." you tell him nudging him just barely with a smile, he lays back down resting his head on the mattress "Alright, honey." he mumbles closing his eyes and breathing deeply.

You go back to looking at his shaft, it's really big, crisscrossed by several veins, there's a very visible one running through it all the way to his mushroom tip, your mouth is watering “'s my favorite part of me,” he continues to tease you, oh you really want to shut him up and you know how. You place your lips on the tip of his throbbing cock kissing it gently and he finally stops teasing you.

You look for his eyes and see him watching you with lust-filled gaze and then you return to his erection and begin to play with it by slowly wrapping it between your lips. You hear Joel hold his breath and then moan heavily. He is really big, you almost feel like you are choking, but you want to enjoy every moment with him. You swirl your tongue around the tip as if it were a delicious ice cream cone, tasting his precum pearl, "Just like that" he whispers before you start to suck and pump fast, you adore the softness and hardness of his manhood “Fuck, that's it!” he moans in a hiss, grabbing your hair with both hands holding you there as he thrusts vigorously into your mouth almost choking you and then suddenly leaving your mouth.

You catch your breath, “Fuck,” he moans pulling you up on top of him with one hand on your back and stroking your lower lip with the other “I was about to come…. “ he tells you breathlessly, "but I don't want to yet, I have to make you come first," he adds causing you to shudder hard, you look him in the eye passing a hand through his hair "Don't worry," you tell him placing a kiss on his lips, he looks at you as if you just said heresy ”Are you kidding! Don't worry, just relax,” he tells you by reversing positions and having your back against the mattress again.

He places a kiss on your lips again and then shifts his attention to your elastic pants pulling down your legs, you remain with your lips parted almost holding your breath, not knowing what to expect.

The roaring of thunders fade while he kisses your still-covered mound making you almost flinch in surprise, “You're already wet, you naughty girl,” he says with a small grin continuing to kiss your still-open mound, “Joel, please,” you beg him slipping a hand through his hair to let him know he has to stop to tease with you. That's when he also lowers your briefs exposing your intimacy to his focused and lust-filled gaze, you seek his eyes, never had anyone observed your intimacy like that making your skin crawl with the immense desire to be touched. He touches with a fingertip first one of the outer lips making you jerk and lower your gaze towards him, Joel then looks up at you “Don't worry, I'll treat her as she deserves,” he says then caresses the other one as well gathering some of your arousal, you moan softly tightening your lips “Don't hold back,” he urges you repeating the same movement with exhausting slowness making your skin crawl and abandon your head on the mattress again closing your eyes.

His fingers play some more on your mound only to be replaced by his lips causing you to snap your eyes open and look down, seeing him between your legs and devoting so much attention to your intimacy almost causes you to spasm. His hands open your intimacy to him and to his mouth, which begins to lick your intimacy along its entire length making you moan and sigh louder and louder, you thrust your hands into his hair pulling a few strands of his hair from time to time, he repeats that gesture several times and then devotes himself to your clit caressing and sucking it gently first faster then “Joel, fuck, fuck,” you gasp clutching his hair tighter and tighter abandoning your head back and spreading your legs further and further, “J - Joel, I… I - oh, fuck, I'm going to-” you moan sonorously and then your climax occurs between his lips as he continues to collect your nectar.

When the spasms of your climax leave you, you loosen your grip in his hair until you pull your hands away altogether, look down, and see him still there intent on kissing your intimacy; then, it's his turn to look at your eyes, “I'd say no one has ever made you cum,” he comments with a half grin.

“Stop bragging and come here,” you reply by sitting up to encircle his neck with your arms and make him lie on you again to kiss him. Although you still feel the contractions of your climax, the taste of you on his tongue and his hands holding you caged beneath him arouse you again “Please make me cum again.” you beg him, barely pulling away from his lips.

“If you ask me so nicely,” he replies smiling at you just barely and then resuming kissing you, “I gotta grab a condom, darlin'” he says pulling away from you as he gets off the bed. You see him take the package and unwrap it, he sits on the bed and slips it on. The mere sight of it makes you moisten even more.

Joel returns to you and with one hand you feel him reach down to your intimacy, almost probing that you are still wet for him. The two of you almost hold your breaths as the tip of his cock lines with your intimacy and then he fills you up “Oh, fuck!” you exclaim almost in unison gasping. Joel fills you all the way and never before had anyone come to touch such internal points of you, he remains only a few moments still to allow you to get used to his presence.

Your eyes close from the intense pleasure you are experiencing, “Open your eyes,” he tells you, you open them, you almost feel as if you can't see as well as the pleasure you are feeling “I know,” he tells you, then giving you a kiss on the lips before starting to move. You moan as he thrusts back and forth, in and out at a faster and faster pace that quickly takes your breath away and makes you moan louder and louder, "So tight, so wet fo' me" he gasps while you hear the pelting rain in the distance.

His thrusts are stronger and deeper as your clearly hear the squelching sounds of your soaked folds “Joel, I'm…I'm…” you stutter moaning, “Baby, me too,” he says without slowing the pace until you arch violently against him letting out the loudest moan you've ever let out, he also grunts loudly in your ear as he comes.

Then, he comes out from inside you and he removes the condom tossing it in the trash. He lies back down beside you, you are both breathless.

You are shivering.

You had a good time, a very good time, but it is only at that moment that you are reminded of Patrick and realize what you have done, a great sense of guilt wells up inside you, and you turn your back to Joel, who is watching you perplexed.

“What's goin' on?” he asks you, “Hey,” he says laying a hand on your shoulder so you turn to him and resting a hand on your cheek “What's goin' on? Did I hurt you?” you shake your head ”Didn't you like that? Did I do somethin' wrong?”

You sigh and sit up bringing your knees closer to your chest, “There's something I haven't told you…”

“You married?” he asks you wrinkling his forehead.

“No,” you answer.

He almost seems to relax, “Then what's up?”

“I'm not a free woman,” you tell him, resting your head on your lap and ready to hear him rail against you. Deep down he would be right, you certainly are not free, he for what you know is and he did nothing wrong in fucking a stranger, it is you who should not have.

“Okay…” he says “I have a question to ask you and please look me in the eye,” you look at him biting your lower lip softly “because from your answer, there are two possible scenarios.” he continues “You happy with him?”

The big question, are you still happy with Patrick? There was a time when you would not have thought twice about it and would have answered sure, of course. And now what do you answer?

You swallow, observing his dark eyes, then the words come out so naturally “Not anymore, I mean…I was fine with him for a long time, then things changed and I've been trying for two years already, I keep telling myself that sooner or later this time will pass, but” you shake your head “it doesn't go.”

He nods, “What 'bout him? Is he also no longer happy or is it something only 'bout you?” you open your mouth to answer, but the truth is that you don't know what to say. Patrick is the sweetest, quietest person you've ever met and that's also why you fell in love with him a long time ago “Just as I thought,” he adds again as he gets out of bed “Anyway, don't worry. I wasn't looking for any story or girlfriend, y'know.” he says before entering the bathroom and turning on the shower faucet.

You lie down again resting an arm under your head, feeling like a slut.

Joel has told you that what has been between you is a noncommittal thing anyway, but can you ever accept this new version of you? Can you accept that you only fucked? Have you really fallen that low?

When Joel comes out of the shower, he hears you talking on the phone with Patrick to whom you ask to pick you up by telling him that the car doesn't start. As you talk to your fiancé, Joel casts long silent glances at you; you watch him too, observing the features of his face, the muscles in his arms, his soft tummy, his now distended but equally large shaft, the well-defined muscles in his legs. Patrick tells you he would leave right away but it will take him two hours to get you, you simply thank him as he interrupts the call with a shy I love you.

The storm's over by now. You are outside the hotel again, but something inside you has changed. You don't know if you like what you have discovered about yourself, you don't know if you can live with it. You feel wrong and guilty.

Joel leaves you in front of your car, you look at each other, he is about to say something, but you shake your head lowering your gaze. You don't know what he wants to say, but at the moment you are overwhelmed by events. He nods silently and then with one last indecipherable look he drives away, leaving you alone in the car.

You are sitting there waiting for Patrick, you don't know what has become of the good girl you always thought you were, you knew you were - not perfect, of course - but at least normal, now you are like so many other women who have betrayed their partners in order to feel again that breeze of newness, that breath of life after years of a now flat relationship.

Patrick rescues you by using the wires thus managing to start the car, on the return trip you think back to what you did, how you gave yourself up after a feeble resistance to the advances of a stranger about whom you know what he wanted to tell you and maybe it is not even the truth. When you get home, your fiancé wants to help you carry your luggage, but you refuse, saying it's light and you can manage it, he cuddles you as always and even makes you dinner. You eat in silence, you justify your silence with some tiredness, but who knows if he has realized that there has been a passing cloud in your life that has unleashed a storm inside you and that you don't know what possible consequences it may bring.

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mybworlds · 26 days

Text

Everything's gonna be okay

Pairing: jackson!joel miller x f!reader (no use of Y/N)

Summary: Joel just had an argue with Ellie, when he comes back home you find a way to help him relax.

Warnings: established relationship, lot of fluff, use of petnames, use of you, videogame references.

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Thx for the dividers @saradika-graphics

The sun was setting when Joel returned to your house. You were waiting for him sitting on the sofa. Joel came back with heavy foot and laid on a chair on the porch. You were reading one of the few novels Joel found during his last patrol not to far from Jackson with Tommy and other few men. You saw the light on the porch and closed the book joining him.

When you greeted him and looked at his face you immediately understood that something unpleasant had just happened. Indeed, his somber expression meant a thing only, he had had an argue with Ellie. No one had the power to hurt him like Ellie, that little girl was so hard sometimes.

He sat down at his wooden chair, elbows resting on his legs "Joel..." you said kneeling before him to look him in his eyes, his eyes were so sad and full of tears, you took his face in your hands, "She's a grown-up kid, now, Joel. Give her some time."

You knew what Joel did in that hospital, you knew he saved her because he learned to love that kid and he didn't want to loose another person who means to him. You knew all the horrible things he did for her, but you knew what Ellie did to Joel and the way she changed him.

"Please, come in, my love." you said placing your hands on his big warm hands.

"Okay, babe." he whispered getting up and following you inside.

You closed the door behind you. The two of you sitted on the couch, Joel was lying placing his head on your thighs and you caressed his dark curls. This was a your habit since a while, since he had a hard time with Ellie or after a long patrol or after his work day as a carpenter. You knew how to help him.

You slowly caressed his soft hair with a very slow motion that let him closed his brown eyes, then you let your hand run along his forehead, his angular nose, his patchy beard and then you place a your fingertip on his plushy lips that he kissed. Then you kissed him back, "I love you, my love" you said.

You knew Joel wasn't the kind of guy who likes to say these things, but you needed to tell him because you wanted to let him feel all the love he could receive from you.

He mumbled an I love you back against your lips while you brought your lips closer to his, you loved to kiss Joel because every time he kissed you he put a hand through your hair causing you shivers and because you knew that deep down he needed love.

" 's that coffee?" he asked sniffing the air with a huge smile on his face, you nodded with a shy smile "You always know how to help me or make me feel better even though..." he stared at the ceiling losing his sweet smile "I know I messed things up with Ellie, she's still mad at me."

"I know... but I'm sure, she'll understand, my love."

He looked in your eyes "You sure?"

You nodded, "Give her a few weeks or maybe a few patrols and the two of you will be buddies like before," you said in an attempt to cheer him up.

"I hope so." he said.

"You want a cup of coffee?" he nodded then you got off the couch and when you were in the kitchen you shook your head. Joel cared so much for that little girl, you had no idea if Ellie could really forgive him, but as Joel you too hoped time could fix their relationship.

You came back handing him his cup, "Thank you," you kissed him and he kissed you back, it was a quick kiss, but later you’d give him more kisses in your bed.

He sipped a few times his coffee, then he got off the couch saying "I’m gonna play a lil..." you saw him got his guitar and go out onto the porch, you looked at him with a sad smile. A few moments later, you heard him sing that sad song and you felt your heart breaks.

Despite your love, you were well aware that there were some wounds in his soul that you couldn't completely heal. Initially, Joel rarely spoke, barely saying a few words, then over time, you learned to know him, understand him and accept hin for who he was and you loved every single aspect of him, even his flaws. You remembered about your different movie nights with Joel and Ellie, it was something the three of you used to do almost every night and every night it was so funny. Ellie used to sit cross-legged and after a few minutes she started to laugh or to comment what you watched using a nasty language that made you smile and often meet your eyes with him. He loved so much that girl.

You heard footsteps, but you intentionally didn't come out. By now you recognized those steps and then to confirm your doubts, you heard her voice.

It was Ellie.

The two of them had lots to talk about so you gave them some privacy and went upstairs, took a quick shower and then climbed into bed.

You had just dozed off when he entered the room, you heard him take off his boots and take off his clothes, then quickly wash himself and finally join you.

He hugged you tightly to him with one arm around your waist and placed his head on your shoulder, "My love" you said, turning partially towards him, he stuck his nose in your hair, deeply inhaling your scent. With one hand he moved the strap of your pajamas, his beard teasing your soft skin as he kissed your shoulder causing you to giggle “I love you.” he whispered in your ear, you searched for his mouth and found it immediately.

You loved him, and still love him, so much.

"Did something happen?" you asked him after exchanging kisses, cuddles, caresses, looks full of love and lust, while you stood with your head resting between his shoulder and his chest "You in a good mood."

Joel tenderly scratched the skin at the base of your scalp, "You were right, maybe things with Ellie can really work out." you looked at his face, even though it was semi-dark, you could see his eyes shining with joy and you couldn't help but smile at him and feel happy for him "Darlin', now I have everything. A home, you by my side, my brother's here close to me and things with Ellie will slowly be able to work out."

"You're so beautiful when you smile," you told him, caressing his face marked by age, "I love you,"

"I love you too, baby girl," he said, holding you in his strong arms, cradling you all night long.

"Will you stay with me tomorrow morning? Maybe you could help me prepare something to take to the inn." you suggest giving him a kiss on his bare chest.

"I'd like to, but tomorrow I have another patrol with Tommy." he sighed "A lot of snow is forecast, but I will be back in the afternoon and I promise I will eat your excellent vegetable stew."

You smiled at him shaking your head "You hate vegetables,"

"Yeah, but I would make an exception for you, my love." he said kissing you while you started caressing him again.

A/N This is a kind of missing moment between that famous ball evening and the day that you all unfortunately know, if you know, you know. There are references to Ellie and Joel relationship in the videogame, hope you like it.

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mybworlds · 28 days

Text

Forever

Pairing: ghost!javier peña x f!reader (no use of Y/N)

Summary: His name is Javier Peña, he's a cop and he's dead. He stayed amongst the living, he doesn't know why. No one sees him or hears him. His only thought is you. He can't do anything for you except look at you and whispers how much he loved you and will always love you.

Warnings: death, loss, angst, sadness (a lot), regret, use of you, no physical description, f!character can tuck her hair behind her ears.

A/N.. this is a sad, a very sad one-shot. This is smt really different from what I usually write, but I woke up with this idea and here it is.

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Thx for the divider @saradika-graphics

Peña couldn't believe what he heard, El Niño was in town. He could have catch him, but his bosses did not pay attention to him. El Niño didn't exist, maybe his informants had taken him the piss. Javier went to the place which he was told, he went there anyway. With or without authorisation. He didn't give a shit.

But something bad happened... something he could never imagine.

Gunshots, a rooftop escape and then.... silence, cold, pain.

Javier never thought enough about death, he always tought it would come soon or later, but he'd never thought it'd come that day and he never thought to see his body lying on a wet floor with two gunshots in his chest.

He felt so much pain, but his death was quick and he immediately closed his brown eyes. The ground became so light and so far, then nothing else. Javier didn't feel anything else. He was dead.

But he was there. He didn't go nowhere. He stayed amongst the living.

His colleagues surrounded his body, they analyzed it without looking at him because no one could see him or hear him.

Over there, there was another body. El Niño. He sold a dangerous chemical drug amongst the young people. It wasn't Javier to kill him. Nor El Niño to kill Peña. It was someone else.

He tried to tell them that he didn't kill El Niño or that he was his killer, but no one paied the slightest attention to his words or how he nervously wandered among them.

He listened, but he couldn't have his say or rail against them because it would be useless.

Only in that moment, Javier remembered about you, he whispered your name and he walked away from the crime scene.

He walked along the streets and reached the door of your house, he knocked stupidly, but you would never answer the door. He was dead.

Oh, my love, he thought.

He would have given anything to hold you tight to him, to give you lots of kisses on your neck, while you prepare breakfast convinced that he was still asleep.

He would have given anything to be able to hold you tight to him and whisper to you how beautiful you are with his shirt on, how soft your skin is under his fingers and his lips.

He would have given anything to be able to talk to you once again, to hear your sweet laugh invade your home, to see that wonderful smile of yours light up your home and make wonderful his days.

But his days are gone now. No more laughter. No more arguing. No more hugs, kisses and whispered apologies in each other's ears. The two of you would never have made love again. And it hurted.

He was there. He didn't even know why. He just knew that he would see you move on with your life and he will only be a mere spectator of your life.

I love you, baby. He would've told you, but it's too late now. The two of you left with a I hate you asshole and a fuck you, but none of those words were true.

My love, I love you, he loved you so bad, even when you discussed because of his job, his working methods, his terrible temper.

I love you, he wanted to whisper in your ear, but you couldn't hear him.

Why did he stay there if he couldn't do anything to ease your pain?

His partner, Steve Murphy, was there. He'd wanted to stop him and stop you from hearing his words, he'd never wanted to see your heart break into a thousand pieces or seeing your beautiful eyes fill with tears or hear you sob.

You opened the door and found Steve Murphy in front of you, he was devasted and you had no trouble understanding that something bad has happened.

"No, my love." Javi whispered in the hope of being able to intervene and don't let you hear Murphy's wordsd, but he couldn't.

You blanched, your eyes immediately becoming filled with tears. "No", you whispered, "no, no, please tell me it's not true" while you started to cry holding onto Steve who hugged you back.

"I'm here, baby. I'm here." Javier whispered feeling bad for you.

You soaked Steve's shirt, sobbing incomprehensible words at first, then you said, "It can't be, Steve. It's not fair, we broke up with such harsh words and now I can't apologize to him anymore." Javier looked at you with eyes full of pain "It's all my fault, I told him he was an asshole and that he only thought about his job. I was even jealous of his job." you sobbed again "He never wanted to talk to me about his job, he told me to mind my own business and I told him to fuck off. I was packing his stuff with the sole purpose of provoking him and to hear him say I love you, you're all I want." Javier would have cried if he could, he reached his hand towards your hair and that's when you shivered, pulling away from Steve.

"What happens?" he asked perplexed.

You shrugged, sniffling, "I felt like... never mind." you said, going to sit on your ruined couch.

Javi watched you intently and you looked up as if sensing his presence "I am here, my love, I am here." he whispered again.

"How did it happen?" you asked Steve "You two are always together."

Steve sighed "He was convinced he could catch El Niño, the drug trafficker of that new shit going around among young people. I didn't believe him and told him to forget about his informants, but he didn't listen to anyone and..." you closed your eyes feeling more tears rolling down your cheeks "Did he suffer?"

"I dunno. I hope not." Steve was devastated, his partner, then friend with whom he had argued many times was no longer there, he would never argued with him again or heard his many fuck yous again. He was going to miss him so much. More than words could express.

"Do you mind if I stay alone for a while? I need..." you breathed deeply, Steve didn't need to hear anything else. He knew you very well. You were about to burst into tears harder than before and you wanted to do it alone. He gave you a quick hug and then he left you.

Javier sat down at the foot of the sofa where you were sitting holding your head in your hands, "Baby, I'm here" he continues to repeat.

You looked up with tears in your eyes, your head full of confused thoughts, the air felt like had been sucked out of your lungs. You felt like you were going crazy. Javier... the only man you truly loved and who loved you and made you feel loved.

"And so you left me alone. Completely alone. Do you remember the first time we met, mi amor?" Javi saw you smile, but it was a sad smile "You said that cloying phrase to me and I laughed in your face and called you crazy, but what I never told you was that mine was love at first sight."

"I love you too, sweetheart. I'll stay by your side, forgive me if you can, I was a terrible partner. I'd never wanted to leave you or say all those awful things to you, it's not true that I hate you and that you never understood me. I was wrong, you're the only one who did, mi amor."

He reached out a hand towards you, towards your soft hair that he caressed so many times while he kissed you or while you made love, you shivered and then you tucked your hair behind your ears.

"I'm gonna miss you so much, hombre. If I could only have you here, even for just a moment... I don't know what I would do, but I would know what to say to you. I am sorry. For everything. Javi, I love you." you said, curling up on the sofa, while Javier remained sitting there next to you with a sad look.

"Bebita, I'll be with you wherever you go, so you will never be alone." he closed his eyes then he continued to say "I know, someone else will keep you warm from now on, someone else will give you a hug, will kiss you, someone else will keep you safe, someone else will console you, someone else will love you, but I will always be with you. I swear. In your heart, by your side. Please, don't look back. Please, carry on. My wonderful little baby. I will always love you. Forever."

A/N If you want to let me know what you think about it I'd appreciate.

#pedro pascal #pedropascaledit #pedro pascal characters fanfiction #pedro pascal fandom #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal pictures #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal fic #pedro pascal as javier peña #javier pena fic #ghost javier Peña #javier x reader #javier pena fanfiction #javier peña #javier pena x reader

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mybworlds · 28 days

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THE MUMMY (1999) Rachel Weisz on working with co-star Brendan Fraser

#the mummy #rachel weisz #brendan fraser #my faves

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mybworlds · 28 days

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New look at Pedro Pascal in The Last Of Us Season 2

#pedro pascal #the last of us #joel miller #im screaming #can you hear meeeee #ik what scene is #im sobbing

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mybworlds · 1 month

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Gimme a Joel Miller in the kitchen in the early morning and everything's gonna be okay

#pedro pascal #the last of us #joel miller #pedro pascal pictures #pedropascaledit #pedro pascal characters

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mybworlds · 1 month

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This was in a Swarovski store and a pillow about the Mandalorian in another store, it made my day 🥰

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #the mandalorian #din djarin the mandalorian #din djarin

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mybworlds · 1 month

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Mr Pascal, please stop rn 🔥😍

#pedro pascal #the materialist #sexy #what a pose

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mybworlds · 1 month

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I need a hug too, I beg you 🙏🏼

#pedro pascal #dakota johnson #the materialist #why not me #i need a hug

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mybworlds · 1 month

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Chapter 2: The Wedding

Pairing: joel miller x f!reader (no use of Y/N) | Rating: 18+ Minors DNI | W.C.: 2.8k

Summary: Your life sounds perfect: you live with a perfect man, you live in your dream house, you do the job you love, you don't miss anything, except love and passion.

Before to leave, thank you for your likes and reblogs ❤️🫶

Masterlist

follow @mybworlds and turn on notifications to get notified when I post new fics

Thx for the dividers @saradika-graphics

Taglist @harriedandharassed

Saturday is a thankfully sunny, warm day. The bride and groom are celebrating their wedding at Fire Island National Seashore, it's two hours away from New York City, but at least they're paying you an extra to enjoy a wonderful place like that and they've even paid a hotel room since they've already announced the event won't end until 1:00 am. That's fine for you, I mean not that you had anything else to do since Patrick told you he would be out for the weekend for business purposes. I mean, you are also out for work and therefore it is okay.

The bride and groom are two very handsome guys, you can tell they are in love, happy. You take a lot of wonderful shots and you can't help but be happy about it because you know that, when they will receive their pictures, they can't help but be thrilled as they remember that wonderful day with a big smile and watery eyes. You also take some shots of the guests, the location, the wedding arch, the venue, everything is wonderful.

At some point in taking shots, you realize that you have also framed someone you never thought you would see there again which is the mysterious and charming stranger from the bar, you don't exactly know how to behave as you didn't leave each other in a very civil manner, in fact you almost had a hysterical reaction. Maybe this is the right opportunity to apologize for your behavior or maybe you can pretend you didn't see him!

You decide to ignore him and continue working, too bad the stranger turns out to be the groom's best man and therefore you necessarily have to take a picture of him as well the moment the ceremony almost ended, so you can't ignore him anymore. You wonder why you are behaving this way, it is absurd, he is a guy like any other why are you avoiding him?

The wedding party is wonderful, organized down to the smallest detail with a lot of care, you photograph everything and then you make sure to choose the best shots, you will propose therefore to the bride and groom and make a nice digital and paper photo montage if they want it; even the food is great, everything is beautiful, but there is that persistent discomfort you feel toward the stranger. Evening comes and you're still walking around with your beloved camera attached to your neck and your finger ready to shoot, people are dancing, drinking, having fun, you're smiling too. It is impossible not to smile at such an event.

Suddenly, however, someone pushes you and you to prevent your camera from breaking, you turn around suddenly falling backwards, some people look at you, someone laughs and then someone offers you his hand to help you get up, a hand which you immediately grasp as you stand up, when you look up at this someone who extended his hand, you realize that it was the stranger who helped you. Your eyes meet again and this time you have a chance to observe his dark brown eyes, this time you feel like a thrill running through your body, “Well, we bump into each other again!” the stranger exclaims with a smile.

“Yes, sort of.” you say in an evasive tone and immediately you let go of his hand to look at your camera that is not broken or is still working.

“Nice shot!” the man exclaims looking at the screen of your camera, the subject of your shot is him, but it was an involuntary shot this one due to the fall.

“Um… well, this was not an intentional shot.” you admit looking at the small monitor ‘I've taken better ones.’ you add as you look up at him. He nods, “'m I in the pictures too?” he asks you.

“Of course, you're the best man!” you exclaim, lowering your gaze and clearing your throat.

“Can I get you a drink?” the stranger asks you, “Oh, forgive me! 'm Joel,” he introduces himself by extending his hand to you, you look first at him and then at his hand, which you shake by introducing yourself in turn. He smiles, “Would you like to?” you nod “Well, then this way.” he adds making a hand gesture in following him.

You have a drink, actually more than one, and your initial awkwardness toward the stranger begins to give way to curiosity and a desire to get to know him, no longer escaping him, and only then do you notice his strong southern drawl. You are sitting on one of those two-seater hanging garden chairs, “How d' you know the groom, Joel?” you ask him, sipping another glass of champagne.

“We were friends in our school days, even though we've taken differen' paths we remained close friends, y' know, we have dinners once or twice a week, barbecues and things like that,” he tells you.

“You look like the barbecue guy,” you say smiling at him.

He smiles shaking his head, “Yeah, huh?”

You nod smilingly, “Well,” you place your glass on the lawn next to the small chair, “I bet I can tell who you are by looking at your hands.” you add looking into his eyes.

He gives you a small grin that causes a wrinkle to appear at the side of his mouth “All right,” he agrees, stretching his hands out, which you grab this time. He has very large hands, big calloused fingers “Judging by your calloused fingers I'd say you play,” you smile at him “guitar?”

“Yes, you guessed it right.” he replies wrinkling his forehead in an amused expression “What else?”

“Well, from the little cuts and scratches I'd say you do a manual work, am I right?” you ask again smiling at him and this time seeking his gaze without avoiding his dark eyes.

“You sure we haven't met before?” he asks smiling at you.

You shake your head smiling again, “Yeah, I'm sure.” you reply “I meet a lot of people in my job, I would have remembered.” you add.

“And why is that?” he asks you slightly losing his smile.

“I don't know,” you reply shrugging your shoulders “some people stick in my mind, I don't even know why.” you add “Well, we were talking about your work, so I guessed right?” you press him.

“Yes, I run a small construction company where I work myself.” you smile “I didn't think my hands said so much 'bout me!” the man exclaims with an amused air.

“Yes, you knows the length of our nails, the nail polish people choose…. It's fun, it's a way of getting to know each other without saying so much.”

“I like that, what 'bout you?” Joel asks by reversing the positions of your hands, “What you think your hands can tell me 'bout you?” you observe how small they are compared to his.

“I don't think they say much,” you answer in a whisper, “Well, maybe there is one thing-- I'm sorry about the reaction the other day. I had some thoughts and I reacted very badly.” you add tightening your lips and looking him in the eye "Sorry, I'm not usually like that."

“So how'd ya?” he presses, sustaining your gaze.

“I'm a photographer, I'm widely satisfied with my job,” you start to answer looking at your hands in his own.

“No, no, no.” he interrupts you making you look up “You, not your job. Who are ya?”

Breathing deeply, not knowing what to answer, you tighten your lips.

“D' ya wanna me to tell you?” he presses you again, you look at him surprised and he continues “You are a person deeply in love with your job to such an extent that you confuse the professional with the person.”

“Now you are also a psychologist!” you exclaim, shaking your head.

“And you're getting angry because I get the poin', aren't ya?”

“You had to be a psychologist!” you retort making to release your hands from his grip, but he is quicker because he doesn't let you free to get up and walk away “Let go of me or I'll scream.” you say in a timid whisper.

“Honey, everyone is inebriated. Maybe the only ones left sober are just you and me.” Joel promptly retorts, “Why are you so afraid that someone might read ya?” he adds as he gets too close to your face and pulls your hands up to his chest level, in that position he almost seems to want to engulf you, and a strange feeling makes its way inside you.

Fortunately, or unfortunately you don't know, your phone rings and he is forced to let you go, you take the opportunity to get up and take a few steps away from him, it's Patrick.

“Hey,” you say almost out of breath.

“Hi babe, everything okay? What's taking so long to answer?” he asks you.

“Um… it only rang twice,” you reply wrinkling your forehead.

“Really?! Well, it seemed so much more! Whatever, it doesn't matter, the important thing is that you answered. How's the wedding going?”

“Good, there are a lot of interesting people here,” you reply, striving to maintain a neutral tone.

“Are you very tired?”

“No, no,” you reply simply.

“Honey, I hear you a little tired, maybe you should rest,” Patrick says thoughtfully.

“Yeah, I'll go in a little while, 'm almost at the cake cutting and then I'm going to sleep.”

“All right, text me as soon as you're in the room. I'm already in bed, so I'll find your message in the morning. Love you, baby.”

“A kiss.” you interrupt the call with a half-smile.

“Who was the nursemaid?” Joel interjects coming up behind you smiling provokingly.

“No.”

“Was mom checking to see if you answered?” he urges.

“No, it was-- never mind.” you reply shaking your head and putting the phone back in your pocket “We should get back to the party.” you add turning your back on him.

“Sure, go ahead and hide behind your camera.” he chides you, you roll your eyes, but decide not to respond to his provocation.

Soon the ceremony ends with the cutting of the cake and the distribution of the wedding favors, you don't fail to take pictures of the bride and groom, the cake, the groomsmen, the fireworks organized by the groom's relatives, the wedding arch, and then the photo of all the ceremony participants with the newlywed couple. Now your evening's work is truly over, it's time to go to bed.

When you are finally at the hallway where your room is, you are joined by Joel who passes you by half a step “Oh, but look we have rooms next to each other!” he exclaims.

"Oh, cool," you say rolling your eyes using a bored tone of voice.

"You snore?" he says raising an eyebrown with a little smirk on his lips.

You roll your eyes “Are you an irritating guy or is this a behavior you reserve only with those you don't like?”

Joel reconsiders and turns back to you, “Actually it's an attitude I have only toward those I like, and you intrigue me quite a bit.” he responds by placing a hand on your bedroom door as you look into his eyes feeling almost engulfed by his figure again.

“Maybe this pick up technique works with others, but not with me,” you retort, but his strong scent of cologne and whiskey is beginning to envelop your senses making your head almost spin.

“Shall we bet?” he asks you.

“What?” you retort, but he surprises you by kissing you on the lips “No!” you exclaim by shirking and slapping him across the face “Don't do that again.” you add in a trembling voice.

He in response, kisses you again, you suddenly lean your head against the door and make to push him away, but he takes your hands pinning them between his without stopping kissing you, it is a sweet kiss, but one that stuns you completely. No one, not even Patrick, has ever kissed you like this first passionately then slowly, languidly. His tongue gently caresses your lower lip and even this gesture causes shivers down your spine and an strange desire reverberates inside you. He almost crushes you against the door without ever detaching his lips from yours, it is only now that you feel all his power, a languid pleasure growing inside you.

You cannot, you must not give in.

“Joel…” you say pulling away from his lips and turning your head to the side “We can't.”

You feel ridiculous, you certainly can't.

“Why? We're two full-grown adults,” he retorts.

“I don't like you.” you reply quickly “And now get out of my way.” you add quickly pushing him away getting him taking two steps back, then you swipe your card to enter the room and before he can reply, you close the door. You lean against it and hear a few moments later the opening and closing of another door, a sign that Joel left.

You slide against the door, it is not true you don't like him, he is a very attractive man, his hands firmly holding yours, his body crushing you, you breathe deeply, luckily you brought your sex toy with you which loosens that strange worrying languor that had made its way into you, but the closer you find yourself to the climax the more the image of your man fades to be replaced by that of man definitely older than him, with a strong southern drawl, a strong scent of whiskey and cologne, it can't be that you are imagining this stranger whispering profane words in your ear, you can't-- and yet your mind is playing this nasty trick on you by making you come violently, you barely manage to stifle a scream of pleasure, afterwards you throw the sex toy across the bed and stay with your legs spread apart and your head abandoned on the pillow, not even when you are alone at home have you ever come like this. You are really out of your mind, you'd better sleep!

The night passes agitatedly, from the beginning you stared at the ceiling for a long time with your eyes wide open and then you hear outside the ocean kissing the shore several times, then you turned over several times from side to side, slept, but then woke up again and fell asleep only to wake up again. The birdsong that morning is almost a panacea for you, you can get up and occupy your mind with other thoughts, you look out and see that the sky is dotted with dense, dark clouds, a sign that it is going to rain and that you need to leave as soon as possible, you immediately call Patrick apologizing for not calling him last night, but you tell him that you collapsed because of a severe migraine, but you are better now. You also warn him that you will be back in the late afternoon, he also returns in the evening, he tells you, then you say goodbye and hang up. You think you told him a lie it is true, but after all it is a tiny white lie.

When you come down with your small bag, you see in the distance the bride and groom who are having breakfast, they look dreamy and happy, when they see you they greet you warmly and then warn you that they will come to the store to see their full photoshoot. You bid farewell with a big smile and good luck of much serenity and happiness. The wind is also quite strong, a sign that you really need to hurry up and leave or you'll be stuck there. You open the car and put your luggage in the passenger seat, close the door and then go to the driver's side, you start the car, but the car won't start, “Fuck.” you blurt “Start, come on, move.” you mumble still trying to start the engine again. Nothing.

“Maybe it's a battery problem.” says a voice outside the car, it's Joel, leaning against the door of your car “G' morning.” he greets you.

You place your head against the headrest, then turn back to him “Do you have any solutions, genius?”

“Either 's the battery or maybe 's a problem with the battery terminals.” he replies to you as he walks over to the hood “Open up lemme see if everything is properly connected.” he continues.

“I thought you worked in the company, not as a mechanic.” you reply by raising the lever so he can look in the hood, then get out of the car.

“Indeed, but my brother's car never starts so on more than one occasion I helped him.” he tells you as he props the hood of the car against the hook “Everything looks fine to me, my brother's car usually is a problem with the cooling system or the solenoid, but here…” he comments aloud as he continues to touch the engine parts.

“Please stop touching, I don't want you to break it!” you exclaim nervously getting out of the car and approaching him.

“Don't worry,” he looks into your eyes for a moment, “I've never broken anything and 'm not going to start with you, honey.”

“Can you tell why from the first moment you saw me you call me that?” you ask him, crossing your arms under your breasts.

“If you mind, I have many other petnames I can give ya.” you shake your head “Shall we have breakfast? I'm starvin'.” he continues, you are about to say no, but he adds again "I can take you, but I'd like to eat first."

“Actually…” you're about to say.

“I promise I won't kiss you,” he says again, raising his hands in surrender with a small smile.

You smile too, “It's not that, it's…” you say, but you don't know how to go on and so you tighten your lips while scratching your forehead in a nervous gesture “I don't know.”

You are totally losing your self-control, you don't know why this stranger is causing you these reactions, why he makes you feel so attracted to him and at the same time why you almost want to run away from him. Interrupting that stream of thought, there is a first flash of lightning followed by a clap of thunder, Joel calls out to you laying a hand on your shoulder “Let's think about your car later, in the meantime let's go back inside and wait for the storm to go,” he says, as a first drop of rain begins to fall, you reluctantly pick up your luggage, Joel does the same, and head back to the hotel.

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mybworlds · 1 month

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#inspo #tmotns #the mermaid of the narrow sea

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mybworlds · 1 month

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Chapter 3

Pairing: Din Djarin x F!Reader (no use of Y/N) Summary: This story sets 15 yrs before The Mandalorian events, Din Djarin is hired by Rebel Alliance forces to protect and escort you, the princess of a dead planet, to your new home. Series warnings: use of you, violence, science fantasy elements, slow burn, angst, fluff, mutual pining, eventual smut (18+ MDNI), trauma. Masterlist

Thanks @idontgetanysleep and @saradika-graphics the dividers. Thanks @vase-of-lilies for the banner.

Taglist: @thegreenkid2, @harriedandharassed if someone else wants to be added let me know.

When you wake up, you discover the doors of your small quarter open and the Mandalorian there intent on staring at you, you wince in fright and at that intrusive gesture, no one had ever allowed himself to stand there and watch you sleep.

“What are you doing?” you ask him as you sit up and look around.

“We arrived at our first destination,” he replies simply as if you are aware of what destination he is talking about or can read his mind.

You let your gaze wander from him to your robot friend not so far from the two of you, “Are you going to tell me more or am I supposed to guess?” you ask him raising an eyebrow.

“All I know is that I have to bring you to a safe place, give you up to someone named Fulcrum and that's it, that's all I know. I don't want to know why, what's so special about you, who's after you and why, I just have to bring you there.” he answers you almost annoyed.

You look him in his eyes or, rather, where you think his eyes are “I'm not asking you to understand, but at least be a little less harsh on me, please.” you find yourself lowering your gaze and remaining silent for a few moments “I don't know if you can understand what I say, but I'm scared, I lost everything. I have nothing left. What I have is the hope of being able to start over somewhere with someone I trust, the hope of being able to fight for something, to believe in something.” you look up at him again "I know I am nothing to you but a useless burden, but you know I have feelings too." you swallow as you look up into his face and bring your knees closer to your chest.

You hear him sigh, “I don't--” he is about to say something, but then he reconsiders, “Hold your breath, in a little while we land and the first impact with this atmosphere can be very uncomfortable.” said that, he walks away going over NK - 841 and disappearing into the narrow corridor.

“NK - 841,” you call to the robot who immediately approaches, “I feel so lonely,”

“You are not alone Princess,” he replies with a metallic voice.

“I do not know what to expect, I do not know what the Mandalorian's intentions are, whether he is willing to sell me to the highest bidder,” you reply with a sigh.

“Princess, the Mandalorian is bound by an oath sacred to him, the agreement made with the man of Arkanon will not be violated.” he replies again with a metallic voice.

You swallow, “I don't know what to believe in,” you sigh, “I'm afraid, so afraid.” you confess, as you are finishing the sentence the ship is shaken by what you imagine is the atmosphere of the Planet the Mandalorian told you about. You do as he told you, hold your breath and hide your head between your legs, the jolting gets louder and louder and your ears begin to hurt, your head gets heavy, as the ship returns to its normal set-up, you find yourself screaming, not even realizing it.

You get out of breath, you gasp. You feel like that room is closing in around you, on you, you feel like you are being crushed, you look at the ceiling trying to regularize your breathing uselessly, “H - h - he - help - help…” you want to say, but only a hoarse whisper comes out from your mouth, you are afraid. You think about your mother and her hugs, about a day when there was stardust in the sky marking the transition from cooler weather to warmer weather, about your father and how he used to make you practice sword dancing, about how uncoordinated you were at first and how funny some of your steps were, about your brothers and how they used to teach you how to read the Arkanian, how they used to tease you when you mispronounced a few words. You feel like you can hear their laughter, their words everything is confused in your mind… when you regain consciousness you're in a significantly larger room, there's light, you're no longer on the Mandalorian spaceship.

You sit down in the middle of the bed, for a moment you feel like you are in your room on Arkanon, for a moment you think that the destruction of your Planet, the death of your family and your civilization, the encounter with that strange guy were a long bad dream, but then you reconnect with reality and focus on the milky walls of the room, on a monitor on the wall, on strange lights flashing on that monitor. You get up, but your head still hurts, you approach that strange monitor when the door of the room opens and you see a young woman with long purple hair and a big smile on her face.

“Good morning, young Princess.” she greets you, you are about to ask her who she is and how she knows you, but she gets ahead of you “I am Elizia, first citizen and chief authority on Planet Ellna,” she observes you “How you feel?”

“Fine, I'm … just a little confused,” you reply, touching your head.

“That's fine,” she says approaching you “let me help you,” she continues, her tone of voice is strange, you wrinkle your forehead “come, follow me. You must be hungry.” she says turning her back to you and inviting you to leave the room.

“Yes,” you say following her, the hallway has similarly white walls, there are windows showing the outside only there. You stop to observe strange creatures running in the trees around you, some eating what looks like fruit, others fighting. You look ahead, Elizia is waiting for you “Those are sacred creatures to us,” she explains “they have been here for more than three thousand years and will continue to be here, they are essential to our survival.”

“Forgive me, but where is my--” yours? “traveling companion?”

“The Mandalorian is resting.” she replies in a quiet tone “Come, let me show you the wonders of our world while we go to breakfast.”

You continue down a corridor surrounded by many stained glass windows, birdsongs can be heard in the distance, and you almost feel like you are back at home in the evenings of the rising sun when stardust made the sky and the clothes of you Arkanians glow, you smile. It seems like something happened more than a thousand moons ago.

The two of you meet other women and men of Ellna, they almost curtsy when they meet Elizia, they all wear long ivory tunics and their white hair - unlike Elizia's - probably the purple hair of the woman next to you indicates her social status.

“All of this will seem very strange to you, maybe my hair, our clothes, even the landscape,” she says again as if sensing your thoughts “this way,” she says pointing to a door that as you approach it immediately opens revealing itself to be an open place overlooking an immense expanse of flowers, streams, it's a breathtaking sight, “Have a seat,” she says, when you turn to her, you find her next to a finely set table, there's lots of good food “help yourself.” she adds as she sits down.

“Thank you.” you say sitting down as well and starting to eat everything in your reach, you realize you are very hungry, you eat a lot, maybe even more than you need and when you look up you meet the woman's amused one “I was hungry.” you justify yourself.

“Don't worry, my young Arkanian. There is no hurry, you can sit here at the table as long as you wish.”

You swallow wiping your lips, “What is this place? I mean, why are you so nice to me?”

“This is a place of great rigor and discipline,” she begins, “We have known your civilization from what you call moons, we have been fascinated by your science, your culture have always been something we have aspired to,” you wrinkle your brow, “we want you to stay here and share with us the secrets of your people.” she adds.

You get up from the table, “Where is my traveling companion?” you ask, making the chair behind you squeak.

She also gets up, “I told you, he rests. You want to see him?” you nod, now understanding her fake kindness, that fake smile. You need to find him now and get away as fast as you can.

You enter the hallway again, this time your step is hurried, your breath short. “He's fine, don't worry,” she says again, but her voice is strange, it's like … distant, ringing in your ears like a distant echo. You walk several yards, then the woman enters a code, and when the doors open, you see a dark place, there are stairs. You hold your breath as you look toward the woman fearfully, “Come.”

You start to go down the stairs, as she passes that place seems to light up, it's frighteningly unbelievable how much you see: she's taking you to what reminds you of prisons. It's so cold down there, it's so … you arrive in front of a jail, yes it's a jail, even though it's dark you recognize the metal bars and then inside there is a machine that makes an annoying metallic noise, you look toward the woman who is watching you.

“That's our mind-absorber.” you swallow intuiting its use “It's a very useful piece of machinery especially when we have uncooperative prisoners, like your friend.” you go back to observe the interior, there's someone, but... “we discovered with this ingenious device that Mandalorians can never take off their helmets since they are bound by their sacred oath except for a few special places or for serious reasons,” you look up at her for a moment then look inward and only then, squinting, you see him lying supine completely helpless. You swallow, your heart pounding.

“What did you do to him? You told me…”

“He's resting,” she interrupts you, “of course not a voluntary sleep, but a necessary one. This place,“ she says pointing to the place - or who knows maybe she's referring to the Planet- ”is absorbing a fantastic millennia-old culture, combined then with yours will help to rise the fortunes of our dying Planet again.” you shake your head shocked and resting your hands against the bars, you shake them "Don't do that, you just make it worse."

“Mandalorian, Mandalorian, Mandalorian, wake up!” you exclaim vigorously you slamming your hands against the bars, you slam those doors so violently that you open 'em. You run close to the man still wearing his helmet, you shake him a couple of times and at that moment that eerie device begins to emit deafening and ever-closer sounds, you see so many pulses recorded on the monitor and it worries you.

“Your friend has a great brain, he has great rigor, he's going to be very disappointed when…” you rip all the wires that kept the Mandalorian connected to the machine, those sounds become whistles “NO, NO, STOP! THAT WILL DESTROY EVERYTHING!” you hear her shout behind you as she runs by the mind-absorber whose screen begins to flicker and flash red with the words ‘EMERGENCY CIRCUITS NOT CONNECTED IMMEDIATELY REPLACE THE CONNECTIONS,’ you shake the Mandalorian again as Ellna tries to grab you and block you.

You turn toward her and something incredible happens, you push her away from you, but it is as if that push you gave her was of extraordinary strength because the woman disappears into the darkness with a scream followed by a distant metallic noise. You open wide your eyes in amazement and observe your hands, they are still the same, no peculiarities, nothing that could justify what has just happened before your eyes. You remain interdicted for a moment longer and then turn back to your traveling companion, you shake him again and again and only then the Mandalorian begins to move, he is waking up, you smile fleetingly at him taking one of his glove-covered hands “We have to go, Mandalorian. You have to get up.”

He nods and struggles to get up, you help him to his feet, make him put on the things he had with him, and then help him to his feet, his step is unsteady as you walk up the stairs and back upstairs.

Above your heads echoes an alarm and a red flashing light, “Mandalorian, we must leave.” you whisper to him “Does this Planet have breathable air?” he nods, you hear him breathing heavily “Don't worry, I'm here, I'll help you. “ you tell him as you trudge down the corridor you had previously walked with Ellna, you reach the terrace on which she had earlier made you eat and from there in theory you could have descended, but in practice it is impossible as you cannot jump or climb since it is a suspended place over an overhang.

“What do we do now?” you ask him, but it's as if you're talking to yourself because you really have no idea how to get out of it, you let your gaze wanders left and right in case something had escaped you, but there's no way out. Meanwhile, not too far away from you, you hear voices, you look at your traveling companion with a frightened look, he still looks dazed, the voices are getting louder and louder they are getting closer, you back up until you end up against him, you look up at him, you know he is looking at you, you feel it.

“Here they are!” someone exclaims, opening the door that separated the two of you from the inhabitants of that Planet, only at that moment when ten men appear before your eyes pulling at you what look like weapons, you feel one of the Mandalorian's arms wrap around you completely and make you reverse your position with his, sparks of red and purple light shatter against his armor as you cling to him as much as you can closing your eyes “Hold on.“ you hear him say, you barely make it in time to cling to his armor that you leave that terrace, you feel like a strong suck in your stomach, the cold air almost scratches your face making your hair move uncomfortably, "Don't be afraid," he adds barely holding you to him, it's a gentle grip, you want to say thank you, look at him, but you can't, "You're safe, we're safe now." he tells you again.

You don't know how long you've been flying or what you've been flying on, when you finally touch the ground, your knees give out and before you know you are throwing up, the Mandalorian will probably tease you until he takes you to your next destination, but you don't care at the moment. When you open your eyes, the Mandalorian is kneeling beside you “How you feel?” he simply asks, you look at him in amazement “Good.” you say nodding your head.

“Can you walk?” he asks standing up and holding out his hand to you, you grasp it as you stand up, but you almost stagger against him “No, I would say no.” he replies for you “Okay, never mind,” he adds taking you in his arms, you barely open your lips wide in amazement, but you do not protest rather place one hand against his chest covered by his armor and the other on your lap.

You arrive after a few moments in what has all the appearance of being a forest, there are many trees and lush vegetation populated by many small strange creatures, from there you hear and feel that it is raining, you lay down at the foot of a large tree and then he fiddles with the leaves, “Are you thirsty?” he asks you.

“Yes.” you nod, looking at him in curiosity, “What are you doing?”

“Don't worry,” he reassures you as you see him create a sort of waterfall with the leaves “you can drink.” his voice is gentle and you trust him, for the first time you trust someone who is not an Arkanian. You drink, let out a small moan of pleasure and smile closing your eyes, you think back to the last time you drank your Planet's so pure water and how you didn't appreciate what you had then, today you only have a memory of it, the smile fades and you open your eyes wistfully again.

“What's the matter?” he asks you noticing your different expression from the one of a few moments before and leaving that ingenious little system prepared for you.

“You know, I was remember about my Planet, my home, and I was thinking back to my family,” you shake your head “I don't know if you can understand,” you bite your bottom lip clutching your knees to your chest “I miss everything I had.” you look at him “Don't get me wrong, you're a good company, but uhm, I mean…” he sits under another tree in front of you and looks at you, you know he's looking at you, you don't see his eyes, but you feel his gaze ‘can I ask you something?’ he nods ”is it true what that woman said? Don't you take off your helmet because of an oath? Or did she lie?”

“It's true. I mean, our people are divided into various clans, we are different from each other.” he explains ‘I'm part of The Tribe clan, we can't take off the helmet, it's our law.’

“And how do you eat?” you ask him curiously.

“That's when I can take it off, but I do it when I'm alone, completely alone,” he replies, emphasizing the last words.

“And how do you know you're really alone? I mean, someone could hide you and see you,” you say looking toward him tilting your head to the side.

“That's why the helmet is also useful, it reveals the presence of others whether they are animals or people.” you nod “Can I ask you something?” it's your turn to nod “Why are you so special? Why did that man tell me to protect you at all costs?”

So, Nanuk said that to the Mandalorian.

Oh, Nanuk!

“I don't know, I'm just an Arkanian, I'm … I was a princess, I had everything, but now I have nothing, so to answer your question, I don't know what's special about me.” you tighten your lips “I just found out a little while ago that I'm … strong, very strong.”

“In what way?” he asks, moving your torso forward.

“When you were unconscious and connected to that machine before, that woman tried to stop me, she wanted you to stay connected to that thing, while I was disconnecting everything instead, she tried to block me as much as she could, but I pushed her away and I thought I was just going to make her back off and instead, um, she… she just kind of flew away, I don't know, I didn't know I was that strong.” you tell him, looking at him ‘Am I weird in your opinion?’ you ask him.

“You are the first Arkanian I've met, I don't know your people despite having traveled far and wide. I don't know, maybe you have a power unknown to you that manifests only on particular occasions.” he replies uncertainly ‘Maybe in dangerous situations.’ he adds.

“Yes…maybe.” you assert scratching your forehead “Your spaceship do you know where it is?” you ask him, you see him fiddling with his armor that makes a series of sounds, you see him stand up and look first to the right and then to the left, he takes a few steps away from you and you follow him with your gaze.

“It's to the west, we could reach it in a short time, but we'd better wait for night. I'm afraid those people are looking for us.�� he tells you, you look at him alarmed standing up immediately leaning against the trunk of that tree.

“But we're safe here, aren't we?”

“For now.” he answers you “Wait here.” he adds and then walks away without another word. The Mandalorian said nothing to you so as not to frighten or agitate you, but they are very close, they are looking for you, he sees them, they are on a hill almost in the vicinity of the clearing. He will keep them busy, you must stay hidden and safe, that is his priority, that is his mission.

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