nunalastor
felony time✨
18+ because we're old and shameless. blame @paincaat for the icon
8412 posts
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Can't send me to a hell full of deer because I've already lived there. Deer in my hometown were so murderous the children just had to get used to homicidal deer chasing you down with intention of violent stabbing and maybe trying to eat your cat. A deer trying to kill a small child was a regular Tuesday.
You'd think they had rabies. They did not. They were just like that, and them being territorial of the nearby woods is the only theory why.
Stay in deer hell then.
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Alastor: Bummed about being a deer demon...
This blog: Lots of fucked up cursed facts about deer and how horrifying they really are.
Alastor: Thrilled about being a deer demon!
I hope he dies. Disgusting deer man ):
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What I've learned from this blog is that Alastor is somehow the friendliest, least intimidating deer in existence because he leans more into the radio and sorcery than his deer characteristics.
No fuck that guy. I hate Alastor.
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I'm obsessed with this frog. Please send in asks so I have an excuse to use him.
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I love how the 50s canned spam casserole is where Alastor draws the line.
Me too
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Also deer eat birds in deranged ways by eating it whole but often leaving the wings behind after they were violently ripped off. Sheep are more infamous for that way of eating the kit-kats of nature, but deer are down for eating human flesh and bone, they are not above it.
Hell has a special place for you and it'll be full of deer.
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If you think the speed of deer is gross, wait until you find out they're actually a million times more horrifying when stalking humans. You do not know the fear of God until you see a deer slowly stalking towards someone with intent to kill.
I don't know how to really describe what it looks like, but imagine a deer, its neck is leaning all the way forward toward its target, walking slowly and making sure it's fucking quiet. Tail pressed down and back, ears flat against head, and just the most soulless nightmare fuel eyes you will ever see.
I don't have to imagine deer. They used to be all up in my neighborhood growing up. I hate deer so much. They're so gross and awful and horrifying. The worst creature.
On another note. That's so Alastor.
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@notsafe4worms I got lunch for you
Cmere and open up.
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Day 2: Sharing a meal (Yes I'm aware I'm doing this out of order-sssshhh)
Gotta love those vintage recipes Vaughn got from his mother.
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the devil went down to...his knees and cried about it
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(Petty anon): I legit do not care if it takes you a day a week a month or a year to post any of my asks. I don't care if my asks end up lost to the void. I enjoy following you and seeing the unhinged stuff you guys talk about or post or reblog and just the general vibe over here. You guys rock!
I was going to ignore this for a month but thanks homie you're a real one
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HC that Drunk Alastor is flirty and tends to sing more modern music. However it takes a LOT to get him drunk enough. Boy grew up during the prohibition anything less than Moonshine is not gonna do anything.
He looks like he would drink brown listerine.
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Deer are beautiful, majestic creatures and they deserve our blood sacrifices!
You're the first sacrifice.
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Gonna mix it up today.
*thump* *squeak!*
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Saw this prompt from @draw-the-squad-like-this and it fit kinda too well.
Note A: a fuckton of followers?? 😨😨😨
Guys I've never had any followers ever and now we're int the triple digits in less than a month??? 😨 Bit scared shitless shocked but mostly super happy!
I'm rusty on Tumblr etiquette, but thanks to each and everyone that follows/reblogs/interacts, you people are awesome and I love you so very much ✨
Note B: tried slapping on some colors.
Hated. every. second. of it.
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You should talk more about cults, deer, and cannibalism to piss that whiny bitch baby off some more.
): I don't want to talk about deer they're freaks. I do not support deer.
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