okay the photos aren't that bad at second glance. I just look. very tired. it was nearing the end of the second festival night after all orz

still cannot believe that 2 simple photos of myself are messing me up this much, I really am very mentally ill lmao

less thoughts about my weird face and body, more thoughts of nikkimick and benson and randy

in my mind I am a strange amalgamation of Mick Mars and Randy (at the moment at least), pathetic looking but still strangely pretty guy type of guy, BUT IT IS NOT REAL AND THE DIFFERENCE IS SO JARRING AND PAINFUL

oh I haven't had the urge to tear my face to shreds in a while. doesn't feel so good to know it's back

Tagging this with gay fandoms sorry

There's currently a European proposition to ban conversion practice in Europe

If you're European please sigh it

If you're not please reblog

brb crying a bit over how ugly and strange my face and body look in the pics the singer took of me and his gf/wife to capture our outfits of the night 😭

like I literally looked like that all night? around other people? how come nobody stoned me for looking so hideous...

goodnight to my beloveds with chronic pain & fatigue 🫶 i hope tonight will be gentle to you all & that you will wake up tomorrow morning feeling rested & in minimal pain

today I was haunted by a nikkimick scenario for all 8 hours of work help

Nikki is all distressed, near tears, staring at Mick with anger and helplessness.

Mick has got a gentle but decisive hold on Nikki's face, his thumb running over Nikki's cheek

"I'm worried about you, you know?" a strange and seldom heard spark of emotion tinting his words. The worry very visible in his blue eyes.

Nikki squeezes his eyes shut, turns his head as much as Mick's grasp will let him. He cannot stand to look at him. A tear rolls down his cheek, quickly wiped away by a gentle hand.

okay enough dilly dallying, gotta get ready for work (think of me, my brain is still in sensation overload from the past 2 days)

[✯]

please do NOT let your friends, family, or career distract you from what's really important in life! that's right - the insane toxic stockholm syndrome held at gunpoint edgeplay yaoi that's happening in the Passenger(2023)

Toki would be a crochet God and you can't convince me otherwise

So at one of my jobs I work with this really nice woman named Liz who has an equally nice boyfriend. Thing is, I don’t know the boyfriends name because Liz only addresses him as boytoy. The term boytoy is used so frequently to describe him that not only does she have no problem using that term but neither do any of her coworkers including myself. One day Liz told me that he would be stopping by and when some dude with a beard came through the door I looked at him and said, “Mr.toy I presume.” And he just looks at me and goes; “The very one.” 

Fucking eh. Relationship goals.

the way benson constantly switches between violence and tenderness is so insane to me. hes bloody knuckles, driving a punch into the soft flesh of randys stomach thats just begging for bruises. hes gentle hands, wiping away tears and uttering reassurances. hes shotgun shells, a trigger finger always at the ready. hes calloused fingertips caressing the back of a neck. benson is fists pummeling a hole in his 3rd grade teachers face and desperate hands clamping down on randys bleeding shouler.

♡♡ matching icons for you and the person you had a consensual workplace relationship with ♡♡