it was 9 chapters and aside from horrified (which i was), i was also embarrased i read those chapters outloud to friends

all goofing aside I genuinely don't understand the urge to reimagine Taylor Allison Swift as a secretly queer icon when the pop music scene(TM) is like. literally overflowing with women who actually like women. Gaga and Kesha and Miley and Halsey are right there. Rina Sawayama and Hayley Kiyoko and Rebecca Black and Kehlani and Victoria Monét and Miya Folick if you're willing to get slightly less top 100. Janelle and Demi for them nonbinary takes on liking girls. like what are we doing here. like I'm not even saying you can't enjoy Taylor but why would you hang all your little gay hopes on her.

how can you eat the fried hearts of something that once was alive and had a beating heart? do you feel any guilt? i hope you do.

please google what an artichoke is

I am absolutley loving the complete garbage fire this years eurovision has turned into. Keep up the good work guys! But as much as it may seem tempting now, remember: DON'T VOTE TONIGHT. DON'T WATCH. IF YOU MUST WATCH, DO SO THROUGH ILLEGAL MEANS. FLOOD THE SOCIAL MEDIA AND EUROVISION TAG WITH INFORMATION ABOUT PALESTINE. IF YOU CAN, DONATE TO ORGANIZATIONS HELPING PALESTINE OR PALESTINIAN FAMILIES DIRECTLY. IF YOU'RE AT THE EVENT, DISRUPT THE BEST YOU CAN. GIVE THOSE BASTARDS HELL. And remember, if Isreal gets a lot of votes, that doesn't mean we have failed. It only means that the only people left voting are zionist. We shouldn't care about a genocidal state winning a competition that supports said state. Fuck Eurovision, from the bottom of my heart.

Gotta say a big thank you to Emily Rudd for the accurate portrayal of any sapphic women seeing big old things before the first kiss.

abbreviations

+ bonus

archaeologist discovers ancient futanari doujin wall mural in lascaux cave system

“I’ll just rest my eyes” is the biggest lie you’re going straight to snorkmimimi land

I love going viral on tumblr.com. It’s like if you stood in a field and said some of the stupidest shit a human being is capable of and then like fifty thousand crows attacked you

worst part about getting angry is how much it makes you want to be mean

"Isn't it weird that [thing humans commonly eat] is poisonous to literally every domesticated animal" I mean, there's a pretty good chance that [thing humans commonly eat] is at least mildly poisonous to humans, too. One of our quirks as a species is that we think our food is bland if it doesn't have enough poison in it.

life advice: if ur cishet male friends dont let u call them babygirl theyre not worth it. but also this is dangerous bc then u’ll buy them a coffee at starbucks and they’ll say thank u daddy and u will automatically respond ur welcome babygirl and then the entire starbucks will be staring at u bc it is 2:45pm on a wednesday. this may happen multiple times. do with this what u will

god i love my friends. shout out to people who love their friends. this is a post for friend lovers

If King Charles dies on or before March 25th, 2024, he will technically be the shortest-reigning king in English history.

Anyway, like to charge, reblog to cast.