Hirotsu: *talking on the phone*

Mori: hm. Maybe the reason we keep getting betrayed is because Hirotsu keeps babying all of our traitors

Hirtosu, to mori: if this is about me leaking info to Dazai-kun, it was for the greater good. I only contact traitors in emergencies

Hirotsu, back on the phone: sorry, I’m back. I left your lunch in the fridge. No, I broke in. Yes, to the military base. Really? Well I think this ‘Jouno aniki’ is a bad influence on you.

Mori: right. Emergencies.

a very beloved happy birthday 🎉

So if I understand the Port Mafia correctly-

(A continuation of this post)

sometimes i like to imagine hirotsu is just the go to guy for crush ranting

like my man will be trying to relax, have a drink, and chuuya will burst in like "can you fucking believe the NERVE of that bastard DAZAI????"

and then after a few hours of that, he'll be like finally, but then higuchi will come in like "akutagawa senpai is so handsome but gin is kind of cool too, i don't know what to-"

and then after a few hours of that, akutagawa will burst in like "THAT DAMNED WERETIGER SMILED AT ME I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO SHOULD I KILL HIM???"

and after a few hours of that

chuuya bursts in again like "WHY IS THAT BASTARD DAZAI'S NEW PARTNER SO TALL AND WHO EVEN GROWS OUT THEIR HAIR LIKE THAT WHY DID DAZAI GET A HANDSOME PARTNER WHY NOT ME"

and after a bit of that akutagawa bursts in again "I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO. I THREATENED THE WERETIGER BUT HE JUST GIGGLED AND NOW I HAVE A DATE"

and then after a few hours of that he tries to relax and tachihara bursts in like "I LIKE GIN DOES THAT MEAN IM GAY"

and after a few hours of that-

I actually laughed

Old man yaoi, as promised

The Port Mafia (2023)

Mafia losers

Bungou Stray Dogs characters as random screenshots in my phone (part 35)

Link to other parts

Idk just Tachihara getting badly injured on a solo mission and on instinct and desperation he calls Hirotsu.

He doesn't think about how this isn't a Port Mafia related mission. And how he's blowing his own cover because he's scared, because he's hurt.

He doesn't think of Fukuchi or the cold stares of government doctors calling him a failure that needs recalibrating.

He calls Hirotsu because he's scared and he makes him feel safe.

Hirotsu shows up, gently and firmly leading him to his car and patching him up in the backseat before getting him to an actual Port Mafia doctor.

He doesn't comment on how this wasn't an assigned mission. Or that Tachihara is wearing a very familiar looking uniform. Those are all questions for later.

Hirotsu spots Tachihara, bundled up in Hirotsu's car carefully bandaged up and asleep in his back seat.

And all Hirotsu feels is relief.

DAMN IT HIROTSU LOOKS SO GOOD HELLOOOOOOO AHSJSEUUE

Credits: aka3kan or 紅 蜜柑 ［あか みかん］on X

I’m convinced Higuchi is the only one in the PM with a semi normal childhood.

And on a related note, I think she should find out most of the others haven’t and force Hirtosu to help plan a trip for them so they can go do fun things they never got to do as kids.

(It’s partially her taking them to places she went as a child and is super excited to share with them.)

Akutagawa complains until Chuuya and Gin chew him out and he maliciously complies (he still thinks it’s a waste of time, but is secretly grateful to spend the time with all of them).

Higuchi basically storms into Mori’s office ready to demand pto for all of them and he’s already buttoning up his Hawaiian shirt and pulling on his fanny pack (he has invited himself and Elise, who has invited Q, who refused to leave Verlaine alone in the basement, who spends most of the trip sitting on a bench with Kouyou and holding the prizes everyone won. Chuuya eventually convinces them to join in and watch the fireworks at night over the boardwalk.

Also, Tachihara cheats at like all of the games that are supposed to be unwinable (he lost once, realized they were rigged, and his pride refused to let him leave without the biggest prize he could get). He and Chuuya brought home like half of the prizes (most were given to Elise and Q, though they both secretly kept a couple one or two. For by accident, of course).

“Mhm, how odd. They stopped fighting…?”

Post mission troupe is very dear to me specially if it’s tachigin

They were really arguing in the backseat with no seatbelts on , Gin trying to get Tachi’s place and getting half their body crashed by him until they gave up and exhaustion caught up to the two of them. They are ridiculous, yes.

soukoku marrige saga pt 7

Tachihara: Hirotsu. You knew Chuuya and Dazai were married right? Hirotsu: Yeah i was there when it happened. Tachihara: so why did you let me flirt with Chuuya! You could have told me something! Hirotsu: I thought it was funny and I wanted to see Dazai fight you. Im an old man, let me have some fun Tachihara: and what did you do recently? Hirotsu: What are you talking about? Tachihara: Dazai sent me a very threatening message Chuuya: *appears* what did my asshole husband do? Tachihara: since when was he not 'bandaged bastard'? Hirotsu: I told Dazai that Tachihara is trying to steal is husband. Chuuya: first of all, Tachi shut up. second, Hirotsu what? Tachihara: im so fucked arent I Chuuya and Hirotsu: yeah probably

Part 7 ~ Part 6 ~ Part 5 ~ Part 4 ~ Part 3 ~ Part 2 ~ Part 1

@sunnikos

mori: i called you all here to discuss your unprofessional relationships with the armed detective agency

chuuya, wearing a too big black shirt w/ a red ribbon and a too big tan coat: what? people are having relationships with the damned agency? what the fuck happened to loyalty!

akutagawa, with atsushi still on his back fast asleep: i was wondering the same thing. the mafia and the agency are two worlds that should never mix

hirotsu already typing up an email to tell fukuzawa about this meeting, while also delightfully telling him how his kids and hirotsu's grandkids are all getting along: how highly unprofessional

kouyou, online shopping to buy kyouka a cotton candy machine because she expressed interest: you all should be ashamed

parallels! how fun 😄 asagiri lock your doors