#really fucking adorable
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
#hlep#original#mental health#my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it#i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support#and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of#huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the#longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel#i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop
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The Charity Ball
part one / part two / part three / (you are here!)
bonus! rehauled Mayura~
I wanted. something. more dynamic to draw when she was getting thrown around-
#dad villain au#my art#viceroy#bitterbug#marinette dupain cheng#tom dupain cheng#emelie agreste#mayura#adrien agreste#lets fucking gooooooo#ngl this update was just an excuse for me to draw smiling viceroy. even in supervillain form he cant hide how much he adores mari#viceroy's butterfly wing helm curls up at the edges when he's really pleased#so naturally just looking at his kid makes his wings go cute mode
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you could never understand the warriors bond between a lesbian and her IT guy
#homestuck#homestuck art#kanaya maryam#karkat vantas#sollux captor#lofaf art#im sorry this is suchhhhh a mean comic for karkat because he adores kanaya#but its also really funny to me to imagine him being fucking destroyed by kanaya. slightly preferring sollux.#solluxs rizz is insane
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the fact that everybody spent four years drawing devastatingly stylish and sultry femme!crowley and then he turned up with THESE LOOKS is just the funniest shit imaginable.
incredible scenes.
#good omens#crowley#david tennant#neil and the costume department and hair and makeup really looked at all that fan art and said you know what? 'fuck you'#and I respect it#I adore this stupid snake#this is literally the least cool being I have ever laid eyes on#can you BELIEVE he has the audacity to make fun of aziraphale for wearing tartan??#after aziraphale's lived through THESE looks???#the absolute cheek#the sheer unbridled self confidence#unmatched
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I absolutely fucking love Brennan and Sibohan as catty British teen sisters like dishing on their enemies and playfully griping (and expressing honest sentiments of love and affection) at each other
#long live the abernant sisters#the abernant sisters#aelwyn abernant#adaine abernant#I adore them#I think their bond is so really and so loving now#even if it comes from a catty place#and OMG sibohan clutching her fist and hitting the table in excitement about finding out dirt about Kipperlily#and the camera’s fucking ZOOM IN#a cinematic masterpiece#sibohan Thompson#brennan lee mulligan#dimension 20#d20#fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#fantasy high spoilers#fhjy ep 10#cursed out spoilers#cursed out#live reaction
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He belongs with them
He belongs with them
HE BELONGS WITH THEM
THAT'S THEIR KID, THEY ARE A FREAKING FAMILY.
And if anyone wants to take him away, they're gonna have to try and rip him out of their hands first.
#I always struggle with a way to define the relationship between Sullivan and Opera#They don't really act like father and child or even like siblings and Opera is way more than an employee#But fuck it man#They are FAMILY and that's all that matters#They both fucking adore one (1) boy#mairuma#iruma kun#marimashita iruma kun#mairimashita! iruma kun#welcome to demon school iruma kun#iruma suzuki#m!ik#m!ik spoilers#m!ik opera#m!ik sullivan
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Awake, awake
This is a dream state
#alan wake 2#alan wake#alan wake fanart#art tag#not going to say i like it a lot. but it came out okay#let’s call it rendering practice#maybe I’ll come back to it later and fix some stuff but for now that’s all#the face and the the suit are my fav parts. really pretty#I’m not posting it on twitter. Sam Lake is a maniac and finds ALL THE FUCKING FANARTS ON THERE LIKE SIR#I adore AND fear your dedication
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everyone's favorite menace to society
#why is he Like That#i love it. i adore it. but he should not be allowed to be the sole provider of Everything <3#hes a fuckin scammer... the Fruitiest scammer around...#at least he is To Me <3#also his apparent one-sided beef with eddie is so fucking funny#'theres only one bushy-browed sideburn-havin working-man in this town!!!'#scribble salad#welcome home#i really didnt expect howdy to be so... well! you all know!#again: i love it. im glad the neighborhood has a guy like him to spice up the place#when you meet the business man... you must shake him by the hand....#his bargaining & coupon game must be Top Fucking Tier#buy something From him & you're gonna leave broke#buy something With him and the store owes You money
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ok people we gotta stop making mori the source of all evil with soukoku. Yes mori is evil about how he treated yosano and a lot of the pm members but that's a whole other can of worms.
Anyways with skk MORI WOULD NOT TRY TO GET IN THEIR WAY IN FACT HE WOULD ENCOURAGE THEIR ASSES TO GET TOGETHER THIS PANEL EXISTS FOR A REASON.
MORI SHIPS THEM SO BAD ITS ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS.
Fics need to stop making this dude try to prevent skk from dating. I want a crack fic where mori is just like "Hey how was ur day do u like to kiss guys?" To both dazai and chuuya. I want mori shenanigans where he's actively trying so hard to set them up and Elise is sitting in a corner with kouyou and they're hard core judging him.
#Every skk fic I read is another skk fic where mori is actively getting in the way of skk#I have very complicated feelings about mori ok#hate his ass#But he's also a silly little guy#He fucked up yosano really badly and I absolutely adore yosano she is best girl I will fight you on this#But also he's a pathetic cringe fail wet cat of a man#Do you see where in going with this?#Mori is the definition of morally grey#But uh yeah#I think mori trying to get skk together would make for a fantastic crack fic if anyones interested in writing it#And yes the “how was ur day do u like to kiss guys?” Is from the my while family thinks I'm gay song bc yes#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bsd chuuya#bsd dazai#soukoku#bsd mori
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I DONT KNOW WHY, but bewitched by laufey awfully reminds me of knight ghost with princess reader
except the song would be ghost's pov
abso-fucking-lutely you're right on all of that. Here's the bewitching:
If you'd told Ghost that he'd be called on to be the crown princess's personal guard, he would've laughed. He would've told you he was hardly interested in such an "honor" and that he's sure her most royal brattiness must have better prospects to scare off. Surely you must have been such a petty handful that the other knights offered the position had declined, leaving him next in the long line.
Although, it was flattering to hear he was even in consideration. He'd sure worked his ass off to be the best of the best. Making something out of nothing but a failing title thanks to his father's- Well, the man was a better father 6ft underground than he'd ever been in life, and that's all he really needed to say on it. Ghost didn't think much of the summons. He couldn't ignore it, of course, but that didn't mean he had to take it seriously. He could run a little late.
Ghost's pace is slow as he walks through the castle. Admiring the architecture, he told his escort, who looked far less than pleased with that answer. He did his best to stall, hopefully the princess would be fuming by the time he arrived and he could be dismissed easily. No muss, no fuss.
Uneven footsteps race down the hall behind him as he and his escort turn the corner. He pays it no mind, likely a maid, no reason to pay them mind. Until they slam into his back and bounce off. He turns, wide eyed, in time to see you fall on the floor, landing hard on your ass with a pained expression. It doesn't fit such a pretty face. Your chest heaves as you try to catch your breath, and Ghost has to shake himself out of staring at you. His escort has already scurried ahead to see about buying him some time.
"You alright?" Ghost asks, helping you to your feet. You wobble a little, he keeps hold of your hand to keep you steady. "You broken?" He tries, brow furrowing at your changing height as you shift on your feet. He doesn't know you, he certainly wouldn't be here if he did.
"No," You lift your foot, and Ghost glances down, one of your feet already in just a sock, "but, I'm afraid I'm running terribly late." You tell him, glancing behind you and pushing your hair out of your face as you unlace your remaining shoe.
"Maybe I can help you, where-" Ghost watches as you tug your shoe off and shove it against chest.
"Hold that please," He blinks, and takes the heel from you, judging by your clothes you must be of high status. He's never seen a lady running around barefoot before. "Now if you'll excuse me, Sir Knight, I really am in a rush, and I have a baron hot on my tail attempting to hold me hostage another hour still."
Another glance behind you, one Ghost leans to check for as well. You must be quick to have outrun a man he can't even see the sweat of. He wonders if you lost your other shoe somewhere along the way or if you, perhaps, threw it at the baron to buy yourself some time. That look in your eyes is wickedly clever when it meets his again. You nod to him once and slip around him to take off running again.
"Wait, I'm-" Ghost stops, and sighs watching you slide around another corner. "The fuck am I supposed to do with this?" He grumbles to himself, tossing your shoe to his other hand as he walks. He'll pass it off to his escort once he meets up with him again. He's pretty sure he went the same way you did.
The escort looks rather harried when he spots him in front of the reception chamber's doors. Big fancy things that have guards waiting to open them on either side. His escort enters to tell the King and Queen that the newest guard candidate has arrived. Ghost tries not to eavesdrop.
"I haven't needed an escort since I was a little girl I'm-"
"A flight risk," The Queen says firmly
"I'd hardly call running from a daft old man a flight risk," The King grumbles. Ghost chuckles a little to himself. His escort slips back out of the throne room to tell him they're not quite ready for him. Which seems strange considering how much time they've had to prepare.
A maid exits one of the nearby rooms with a pair of slippers and something clicks in Ghost's head. Despite his escort's best attempts at stopping him, Ghost enters the throne room with the maid, and watches your sweet face fall as silence covers the royal family. The maid too, it seems, doesn't know what to do.
"Sir Simon Riley," Ghost announces himself, "I was called about being her highness's personal guard."
"It seems you've already run into each other," The Queen's lips purse, eyes on the heeled shoe in Ghost's hands. He offers the offending shoe to the maid, and takes the slippers.
"This is really-" You whisper to him, Ghost hums, slips the silk slipper onto your foot. You swallow, try again, "I'm sorry to have troubled you, I can't imagine how you must think of me."
"Briefly," He tells her. You're still standing at the bottom of the steps to the throne; apparently having had time only to argue with your parents, not take your seat, in the time between bumping into him and getting here.
"Sir Riley," you start.
"Ghost," he corrects you, "if I'm going to be your guard, I'd like you to call me Ghost."
"Ghost," you start again, not even a hint of annoyance in your voice. Actually, you sound a little embarrassed. It's cute. He likes how easily you give in to him. "I'm sure you'd find this position terribly boring, and a waste of your many talents."
Ghost drops to one knee, and pats his thigh, you quickly raise your foot to settle on him.
"I mean, I'm really not the flight risk my mother thinks I am, and I hardly think you want to accompany me on diplomatic excursions-" he holds your ankle to slip the new house shoe on "-or trips into town. Wouldn't you rather be off, I don't know, fighting marauders and dragons?"
"What do you think knights do, princess?" He smiles, setting your foot on the floor and prompting you for the other one. "It's my privilege to serve you, one I'm enjoying so far."
You feel heat brust over your cheeks, finally taking in the man in front of you. This man is a trained combatant and yet here he is helping you put your shoes on. Christ, you'd literally run into him, and now he was. Why was he treating you so nicely, he should be laughing at the idea of serving you.
"No," He murmurs back, "You can't imagine what I think of you." He stands as you settle your foot back on the ground, and takes your hand, bowing his head to kiss the back of it. "But, rest assured those thoughts are good, my lady."
#acts of service acts of service acts of service#wow princess u sure take orders really fucking readily for someone in a position of power#just with Ghost huh? wonder what thats about#cod x reader#simon ghost riley#x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x reader#simon ghost x reader#ghost mw2#knight!Ghost#princess!reader#medieval au#i fucking adore natural subs and i think its fun putting them in positions of power sue me#this one doesnt hurt i hope you all enjoy the fluff
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Break a leg (dp x dc)
"So, the food here is pretty sweet," the girl sitting next to him starts.
Damian hums before remembering he's supposed to be gathering intel and that means he has to talk to people.
"There aren't a lot of vegetarian options," he manages with a tight smile, making sure to look like he is stressed over the audition.
"Oh yeah, that's true," the girl says and falls quiet for a moment.
Damian looks back down at the script he's reading, though he knows the lines by heart. And then the girl speaks up again.
"So how'd you get here?" she says as she swings her legs. "My name's Dani by the way, what's yours?"
Damian folds up the papers carefully. "I'm Stephan," he says. "My agent suggested I try out for a movie role." He offers the girl a convincing shy smile. "How about you?"
"Some guy came up to me and wanted me to audition for this. I thought he was a child trafficker so I followed him. Turns out he wasn't and now I'm here," the girl said before shrugging.
"Why did you follow a man who you thought was a child trafficker?"
"To beat him up," the girl answered.
"Oh." Damian is going to assume that's a joke, if only to preserve his last bit of faith in human intelligence. He's pretty sure every child knows to go away from criminals, not towards.
"Who are you auditioning for?" Dani asks.
"I'm trying for Lennox," Damian answers, shuffling his papers as if nervous.
"A lead," the girl exclaims before extending a fist. "Nice, dude. I believe in you." Damian internally sneers at the gesture but outwardly, he smiles sheepishly and knocks his knuckles against hers. "I'm going for Abigail," the girl continues. "If this goes well, we might end up working together soon, huh?"
"Hopefully," Damian answers with a smile.
Dani smiles back widely and is about to answer when a lady steps out into the room.
"Danielle Nightingale?"
The girl gets to her feet with a chirped "present!" The lady gestures to follow before walking back out. Dani looks over to Damian. "Wish me luck!" she says before twirling away without giving Damian the chance to actually answer.
Damian sits in silence as he looks back down at the script when his earpiece crackles to life.
"Wow, baby bat, that was downright sweet," Brown's whistle comes over the coms. "When's the wedding?"
"I will hurt you," Damian hisses back, hiding his mouth behind the papers.
"Just saying," she sing-songs. "You were awfully chummy out there."
"I was trying to follow your instructions," he bites out quietly. "Or would you have preferred I didn't?"
"No, no, I prefer my civilians un-stabbed," Spoiler answers lightly. "I just didn't know you had it in you."
"I was trained for infiltration," Damian points out. "I know how to lie."
"That is good news because we need you to get on that crew," Brown says. "Ready to blow their minds?"
Damian lets himself have a little smirk, hidden behind the script. "They won't know what hit them."
#They both get the parts#Dani is just going with the flow and having fun#Her costar is a sweet but really shy dude and she has decided he is adorable and that she will protect him at all costs#Damian is stuck with the shy guy act that he pulled together for what he thought was a nobody NPC and he is losing his mind#his costar will not leave him the fuck alone#Also#if she even TRIES to pet his hair again he will bite her fingers off#Steph is laughing obnoxiously#danielle phantom#damian wayne#stephanie brown#dc x dp#dp x dc#roxpoxwrote#roxpox
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#dreepy#very cute li'l ghost thing. i quite like this evolutionary line. i think they have really nice colors and i love the way they're shaped#and i think ghost/dragon is a fucking epic concept. i love the sounds they make‚ too#i love pretty much everything about this line. power creep included :)#and dreepy is adorable#projectile of dragon darts right here
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"I think this is the most inhuman; and human, that I've ever felt.."
MUCH CAN HAPPEN IN A YEAR. IN FIVE YEARS. A DECADE. imagine how much can happen in a century. just ONE (1). How will you grow? what phases do you find? even in 5 years, you will find patterns.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#jrwi suckening spoilers#jrwi the suckening#arthur bennett#HEY SO THE REALLY FUNNY THING THAT THE CHARACTER DID THAT SEEMED RLY SILLY N GOOFY IN THE MOMENT?#LIKE THE WHIPLASH BETWEEN SERIOUS N SILLY ALMOST PISSED YOU OFF? WHAT IF I FOUND A WAY TO MAKE YOU SAD ABOUT IT#this was meant to be a scribble that would be a bigger part of a bigger page.might leave it on that page.#but still. bc o that i nearly posted it onto my wacky side blog.BUT NAYY I SPENT TOO MUCH TIME N ENERGY N YOU GOTTA SEE IT#ARTHUR BENNETT DRIVES ME CRAZY. I FEEL LIKE ITS ODD FOR HIM TO BE SO TECHNOLOGICALLY OUT OF TOUCH#WHERE HAS HE BEEN. HAS HE BEEN IN WAR? IS THAT WHERE MAGNUS CAME FROM? WHERE WAS HE WHEN HE WAS WITH EDWARDS CREW?#ARTHURRR I HAVE QUESTIONS ARTTHUUURR!! HEY CAN I ALSO ASK; WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU BECOME#DO YOU THINK HE HAD ANY IDEA HE WOULD VEER CLOSER AND CLOSER TO THE MONSTER HE DESPISES. ALL BC HE DESERVES IT. OR WATEVER#HE FASCINATES ME SO MUCH. TO LOOK AT THE STONE COLD STOIC FOOL FROM THE START OF THE SHOW#AND TO FIND OUT THAT HE USED TO BE A BAD BOY.. A DELINQUENT... A LIL PRANKSTER.... MY GODDD THATS ADORABLE#I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW MORE.... BUT I DOUBT THE LAST EPISODE IS GONNA ANSWER THOSE QUESTIONS..i love arthur bennett so much....#AS FOR THE ART!! i mostly used the fire alpaca watercolor brush. tbh im not a brush guy. anti aliased default pen tends to be my main game#but LATELY IM SQQQUIRMIN OUT OF AN ARTBLOCK so expirimenting like this is helping#DONT LOOK TOO HARD AT IT!! im still proud tho. colors are fun :3 im also very proud of the backgrounds#I LOVE THE CARTOON THING where the background looks all fancy n painted but the characters are solid colors#what else can i ramble abt. OH YEAH. i looked up the bikes to make sure they were time accurate tehehehe. 1913 to 2012.#almost a century apart!! isnt that neat? ALSO FUUUCK CAN I JUST MAKE A QUICK CONFESSION. DOWN HERE IN MY TAGS.#only the strongest can read my tags anwyay. SO I REALIZED WHY I LOVE ARTHUR SO MUCH. TIME IS A FLAT CIRCLE#while arthur is a Stoic and Cool vampire w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORs#THERE HAPPENS TO BE A ROBOT FROM A BAND W A TITANIUM ALLOY SPINAL COLLUMN#WHOS A Stoic and Cool ROBOT w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORS#the fuckkkiiinnngggnn The Spine from steam powered giraffe. WHATEVER. i cant escape from my heart. i guess.#i think The Spine and Arthur could be friends. Arthur saw the band perform back when they were the Steam Man Band#EDIT: WOOPS I DIDNT REALIZE THIS WOULD END UP IN THE SPG TAG. HI GUYS DIDNT KNOW U WERE STILL ALIVE SORREE 4 THE CROSS CONTAMINATION
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SubScorp Week 2023 - Day 5: Mortal Kombat Legends
"Such sloppy footwork, Sub-Zero. Get up and try again! Unless, that is, you'd rather stay down here..."
@subscorp-week
#gopher art#subscorpweek2023#mortal kombat#subscorp#mk subzero#kuai liang#mk scorpion#hanzo hasashi#so. i keep drawing kuai being bound with hanzo's chains. which probably says something.BUT YOU CANT PROVE ANYTHING#anyway. ive said before and ill say again that i LOVE their dynamic in the legends duology (snow blind is also *chefs kiss*#but i really dont deel like its meant to be a direct sequel to BOTR. just the little inconsistencies get me.idk)#but i dont think ive mentioned that i ADORE their designs too. they look so fun your honor. i do not and will never give a fuck about#costume realism in mk. i want them to look fun! and silly! and they do in legends!#tried to incorporate some of the actual botr style too btw. i dont think it worked super well but whatever. i still like it.theyre cute
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Cute baby Jere
#so so so cute#fucking adorable#I would cuddle with him forever#just cuddling#really#käärijä#jere from vantaa#jere pöyhönen#vintage käärijä#my blorbo#jeretonin
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some hasty Laughingstock ft. butterfly!Howdy for your mild enjoyment...
#i have this... scene in my head#where howdy is having a bit of a breakdown over his Yassification™️#he just destroyed half his store w/ his wings and etc etc barnaby finds him curled up in the Back#howdy's all like 'i was such a handsome green.... now im this horrible blue w/ ugly black forearms blah blah blah'#and barnabys all '??? the fuck are you talking about youre literally stunning??? shut up lmfao ill make out w you'#and then i also thought Oh so butterfly howdy cant really fly#but what if he like.... does this cute lil flutter when he kisses barnaby#and it generates enough Lift that it makes him way lighter and lets him aaaalmost hover#because i think it'd be ADORABLE and im RIGHT-#anyway those are my thoughts behind these silly scribbles#scribble salad#laughingstock#yassified howdy <3#i have soooooo much affection for laughingstock + butterfly howdy#barnaby and his girlboss gaslight gatekeep gorgeous husband <3#he's ken & howdy's barbie#and he is Kenough <3#and howdy is. uh. Barbalicious <3#do i sometimes wonder why i lean towards viewing howdy more Feminine than the others? yeah#and then i immediately go 'bc its rad as hell and objectively Correct' (delusional)#and then i high five myself and move on with my day
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