Pink Lady

(Not real pixel art, just fancy brushes I downloaded)

Been meaning to give Clara something like this for a moment now- got brought up and I was feeling motivated so! Here! Take it! :]

Part 42 - Unknown Files

No one’s POV...

Loki looked at you hurt, but you were right. He always judged people, before he even knew them. He stood up and left your chambers. You huffed and laid down in bed, sleeping.

Midnight...

You awoke and dressed yourself up. Your helmet was missing, but Loki had it anyways...No matter. You went to Loki's chambers and awoke him softly. He stirred and then looked at you sleepily.

"It is time. Dress yourself up."

"You sure you want me to tag along ?"

You huffed.

"A silly argument, doesn't mean that I hate you after it. Now get your royal ass out of bed and dress up."

Loki smirked at you and then got up, dressed himself up in his armor and then they left his chambers.

"Who is next ?", Loki whispered.

"You go and wake Frigga up, then Lady Sif and Frigga will wake Thor up. I will wake up Fandral. Thor will go awake Volstagg and Fandral will wake Hogun up. We all meet together at the rainbow bridge. Good luck."

Loki nodded and then you both parted ways. You were the first one at the rainbow bridge, then Loki was next with Lady Sif, then Frigga, then Thor with Hogun, Fandral and Volstagg. You all got your horses and rode over the bridge to the Bifrost. Heimdall was standing there already. You got off of your horse and then went to Heimdall.

"Is everything clear ? Laufey already up and ready for traveling ?"

"He and Lence are up and ready. Joe is running there already."

"Good."

You turned to the others and motioned them to get down and to you. They did and then you all went into position, to be teleported to Jotunheim.

"I will stop the time then and nothing will change. It will be a second and then I call again in your point of view, Heimdall. So be prepared. Okay ?"

"I understood, Destiny."

"Good. Then let’s do this."

And with that the Bifrost opened and you were sent to Jotunheim. You all landed near the house of Laufey. You went to the door and knocked softly. The door was opened shortly after. Laufey ushered you all inside the house and then closed the door.

"Has anyone followed or spotted you ? Any trouble ?"

You all shook your heads.

"You ?"

"Nope."

"Okay."

You let down a bag you had packed and got out some little bottles. There were 10 of them inside. You gave everyone one bottle of it. They looked at it in confusion.

"Once Joe is here, you all drink this potion. It will stop you from atlering for 1000 years."

"Why would you give us that ?", Loki asked confused.

"Where we go, Loki. You will be dead in one blink of an eye. As soon as we arrived the planet, I want us to land at, for answers...you will age quickly. The days there are years here. The time is working different. 1 year is there at least 40 000 years here. And I don't want you to die there so quickly."

Loki and the others had big eyes. Loki even gulped.

"1000 years are there just a few hours, maybe even a day. We will need it..."

They all gasped and Loki gulped harder.

"Okay...we wait.", Loki agreed.

After 5 minutes Joe came and then everyone, besides you, drank the potion. Then you all teleported and the time in the universe around the one planet, you wanted to arrive at, stopped. As you landed there, you all felt dizzy. Loki even groaned. As you saw more clearly, you were in shock.

"Oh no..."

Everyone looked at you and then at the sight you looked at. Their eyes widened. Houses were burned down, and smoke arose from them, like they just got burned down...Bleeding people laid on the ground, already dead. The blood was black and dry. The only house standing was...yours. The house you lived once inside, before Thanos.

"What is this place ?", Thor asked.

"....That was my home...From where I ran from...", you whispered.

Frigga gasped.

"From here you came ? Oh dear..."

"I had to leave. He was after me and ripped this place down."

"Who ?", Loki asked.

"T H A N O S."

Loki started to stiffen. He was tense of shock.

"This place was called 'Destraliationa'. And we are here for 'The all knowing of all' library. It is undestroyable and full with wisdom. And we need that now."

They nodded at you.

"But first...We go in my old house. It is weird that it is the only one still standing...I want to know why."

You all went to the house, cautious about a surprise - attack. As you reached the doors, you magic-ed them open and unsheathed the sword. You entered first and then the rest moved afterwards, armored and ready to fight, whatever will come. You went into every room, checking if anything or anyone was there, waiting to attack. Nothing. The lower floor was safe and you went back into the hallway and looked at a picture. It was an honored one of your 'mothers'...that bitch. You took it off and there was nothing but wallpaper. You punched your fist inside the wallpaper, the picture had hung on, and the facade ripped. In there was a code with documents and files, you never saw before. The code was yours. The files and documents not.

"Interesting...", you mumbled.

You opened one of the files and your eyes darkened. Why, you ask ? Well...

'Entering notes of secret mission, Brandon and Iva noting....File 1... We did as Senior Thanos told us. We did crimes and said that we didn't do it. We let it look like our daughter, Destiny Dust, did it. She accepted her punishment. Soon we will have all informations, we need, to erase all those other species' out there. Now we have to kill others, so no one goes and discovers the truth. Soon everyone will kneel and beg us for mercy ! We will be unstoppable ! And Destiny ? That little brat will do nothing to stop us ! She is weak and easy to manipulate ! Piece of cake ! End of entry.'

'But wasn't he a kid then ?', you asked yourself.

You turned the page and there was another short entry.

'Next Entry...Thanos' son, Thanos J., hates Destiny. Everything is going according to plan ! Soon Thanos J. will attack and no one will stop us !'

The next page...

'Third Entry... S. Thanos died. Destiny returned, but the library of all knowing, denies us enterance ! The plan is failing . We just have that brat, Destiny, as information source...She will suffer ! What she deserves !'

And then Destiny had to have an evil, dark smile on her face. Why you ask ? Read it yourself...

'Fourth Entry... The plan failed. Destiny disappeared, the library didn't let anyone enter, the informations are all gone and Thanos' army was still too little. Everyone is dead. He let us live, but disappeared.'

The other files held informations of Thanos' army. You had a huge kill - hunger now. You wanted your once - has - been parents dead. You stormed upstairs, the others close behind, and went still. You listened. Moaning was suddenly heard. A woman then a man.

"Brandon ! Ah~!"

"Iva~! Oh god yes~!"

Your 'parents'. You stormed in the direction and kicked the bedroom door open.

(Sorry I couldn't help it !)

Iva screamed in shock and covered herself. You stalked to them with dark thoughts, ready to kill them.

"Destiny ?!", they both yelled in horror and shock.

Part 43

Masterlist with all Chapters of this Story click here !  

The Scavenger. CH: 3 (Cobb Vanth x OC fanfic)

Chapter 3: The Search 

simpFandom: The Mandalorian

Word count: 3636

Summary: Plog is searching from town to town for anything related to the missing Scavenger. The Marshal finds she is gone already.  

A/C: If you havent read the first parts, they are here and here. Also you can check them on my wattpad 

"I'm telling you, this is too much. I'm not paying for that piece of trash." The pale hooded man rose his arms and signed at the tiny hooded figure.

The Jawa just shook his arms and argued back that it was a fair price. It might be an old speeder but it works. He was trying to explain and then folded his arms, telling him to take it or leave.

Plog just frowned for a moment and handed him the bag with credits. The Jawa took the time to count it and shook his hand. He steps aside to let him check the old imperial speeder. The weapons were down but, it moved. For him, it looked like they put together whatever they found and just label it as imperial to get a fair price.

He muttered in his language and took off in the speeder.

He didn't like Captain Qod that much, yet, it meant protection for him. His gambling habits got him in a lot of trouble, Qod stood up for him in exchange for information. Plog was useful and sneaky to get intel from strangers or anyone. He knew everything about the town, what kind of drink you like, how many Hutts went around before they were all gone, even knew about the lone Jedi that years before helped that farm boy. He never saw them again.

Now, he was just an errand boy, looking for two bounty hunters and their prey. Probably they killed each other and tried to take the canister, who knows. There was a small chance that the woman was dead already. After all, it was the Captain's words to bring her dead or alive, he didn't care, he wanted back was his prize.

Plog wasn't exactly loyal to anyone but, he owed Qod, and the man was good at finding traitors and take them down personally, like the time he just threw one of his crew members out of the ship cause he giggled about his heist plans. Qod didn't like pranksters or jokers, he was serious with his matters. He had little tolerance for stupidity but, Plog a lucky card, he was silly and clumsy, yet, he was useful.

The first stop would be nearby towns, asking the right folks about two lousy hunters wouldn't be so hard. Those two weren't exactly low profile. They were loud, show-offs, always trying to demonstrate how strong they were, picking fights cause they could, ally with other hunters that were stupid enough to trust them and take the bounty from them. No honor amongst thieves.

But those stops would be useless. If those two are on the run, they would go to Mos Eisley's spaceport and take passage with anyone, leave with the canister forever. He hated the whole road to Eisley cause that meant problems; dust, Tusken Raiders, and long cold nights in the middle of nowhere. He loved the comfort and the luxury in the city that he disliked those dead areas and sleeping in the ground. That annoyed him the most.

...

The sunbeam made its entrance through the thin curtains aiming right at his face. The first rays were warm but not burning ones like the mid-day ones. He opened his eyes and quickly scanned the area. He studied the dirty white walls and dusty ground, the armor placed in a chair next to a helmet.

Cobb sat up and stretched a little. He had no idea how long he slept but it was time to start his duties. An idea bolted in his head and made him rushed to the room.

It was empty.

He sighed and shook his head, looking around last night's disaster; shattered glass on the floor, the bloodied and dirty bandages. He rubbed his temples to think.

Maybe it was the best if she was gone but he felt responsible for the girl. He was not a smooth-talker with strangers and worst, with women. He was rough with her and pushed too much. He didn't even ask if she was feeling better.

When you corner an animal, they jump on you, he thought. No reason why the girl snapped at him.

Cobb picked up the glasses and bandages, putting them into a small bin. Then, he fetched a clean shirt and tossed away the dirty one. He ran his fingers through the primitive like star-shaped scar with dots and hashes on his back. He hated every side of it, what it meant but, it was a reminder to keep fighting.

A knock at his door interrupted his thoughts and rushed to put on the long-sleeved shirt. By the entrance, there was a slim guy with a hat and big rounded shades. He had small scars over his cheeks. When the Marshal stepped out, full armor and everything, he waved at him.

"Morning Marshal! How was last night's watch?" Marc flashed a friendly smile and shook hands with him.

"Nothing new, son. Creatures chasing each other. Not sign of the Dragon yet." Cobb adjusted the crimson bandanna across his neck.

"That must be a good sign, right? Maybe it's gone."

"Or just hunting somewhere else. Anyway, is the list ready?"

Both men walked together across the town making their way towards the bar. Cobb could hear Marc talking but was not paying too much attention, he kept wondering if the stranger was gone, maybe lost in the dunes, limping away from Sand People, or worst, found by the large Dragon.

His mind kept drifting. He thought about his time as a slave, how the women had it worst than anyone. He hoped that The Mining Collective or the Red Key Raiders wouldn't find her. The whole idea of what they do to young girls just made him sick.

He felt bad for thinking that and worst for not being able to help her. Damn, he wished she would listen to him and understand he had no shady intentions.

"And we need fuel." Marc's voice finally made some sense and snapped the gruesome thoughts in the Marshal's head.

Cobb frowned thinking about it and he started to nod. Marc rose a brow noticing the lost gaze and rephrased again.

"For the speeders. And extra for the young lady, your guest."

"My guest?" Cobb said.

"Aye, she got up early. Limped around and waited for the old Weequay to open the joint."

Cobb tried to act as cool as possible and told Marc to look for him later. He would fetch a soup and get them ready to go. The Marshal made his way into the joint and scanned the area looking for her.

The young redhead was near the counter having lunch; blue milk and slices of Ahrisa. She dipped the bread in the liquid and took a small bite. She finally looked at the Marshal but didn't say much. Just gave him a slight nod.

Cobb tried his best not to smile, he was glad that she was still around.

"Everything ok, Marshal?" Weequay spoke at him while he poured down a drink and slid a wooden bowl for him.

The Marshal nodded, gulped down his morning drink, and then took the bowl. He noticed the bartender's uneasy eyes when he looked back at the young redhead.

"Is it safe to keep her around?" The old one lowered his voice.

"Just for a few days, pal. Let's give her a break." Cobb sipped from the bowl.

Nath just kept her gaze down her plate and didn't dare to look back at the armored man. She was shamed about her behavior but was too proud to apologize. She heard his footsteps approaching her and looked up at him.

"Thought you were gone." He flashed a pearly smile.

Nath just shrugged and looked away. "I was about to but I was hungry, so, I hopped my way out and got here."

"You know you could ask for help, kid."

"You seemed tired. I don't wanna give you much trouble." She took another bite from the bread.

"How's the leg?"

"Better, it hurts at times but it's not that bad."

"Good. I'll bring more bacta spray then."

"Going somewhere, Marshal?"

"Out of town to get supplies. Do you need anything?" He placed the bowl on the table like he was about to sit down with her. He gave it a second thought and stood still.

"Just the fuel. I was hoping to put together a speeder with whatever was left from the crash."

"Whatever you were riding is gone. The rest is with us."

"Are they working properly? Maybe I can check them for you cause I took some pieces from them." She tried to stand up but the leg stung at that moment. She cursed quietly and sat back.

Cobb chuckled and placed his hand over her shoulder while looking at her.

"Don't sweat about it, kid. I'm sure they are ok" He reached the bowl and sipped it while reading out her expression. She didn't say anything but after giving it a long thought, she nodded at him.

"Well, you should trust me on this. They are gonna break down before you exit the town." She took another bite.

...

The streets were packed with junk dealers and other black-market folks, trying to shove you whatever piece of trash droid or strange food they had around. Plog just kept walking between them, trying to keep them away from his pockets.

He wasn't exactly a flashy man but, these lowlives can't tell the difference and are willing to steal anything they can find.

The pale man was uneasy for parking the speeder outside the dirty joint, Jawas or other scavengers always stopped long enough to take a piece or two. If he needed intel about the bounty hunters' whereabouts, that was the only place where he could go.

A smoky atmosphere crashed his face, followed by music and indistinct conversations between the folks around. Some helmets looked back at him, just checking the new stranger. Others just ignored him, no one started for too long.

Plog just moved around to catch up with the Zabrak bartender. He had mean looks, a horned head but quickly asked him if he needed a drink. Plog slid the credits on the counter and, the Zabrak took them fast.

"What are you looking for?"

"More like who. I dunno if you saw these guys around." He took out a puck that flashed the hologram of the two bounty hunters. The Zabrak examined the blueish image and made a face.

"Yeah, those two were around a couple of nights ago. They go around like bounty hunters but ain't exactly from the Guild. They got a reputation for joining bounty hunters from the Guild in their quests. When they have the proper opportunity, they shot down the Guild member and take the puck. It worked the first two times but those two are stupid. While they were drunk, they didn't stay quiet about their achievements and got The Guild's attention. There's a price for their heads so, my best guess is that they must be dead by now."

"Do you know who they were tracking the last time?"

"Some old Quarren."

"Did you see a woman or someone else with any of them?" Plog said.

"Not, I mean, the Quarren met with different people that day, all of them male. He even cut a deal with a scavenger." The bartender paused while his thoughts drifted for a moment.

"Now that I think about it, I can't tell if it was a woman or not. He or she wore a long tunic and mask. But I remember that scavenger cause those two followed him after taking down the Quarren. It was strange they just left him there to follow him or her. "

"Anything peculiar about the scavenger? Did they come back?"

"I haven't seen them after that day and the scavenger, I didn't pay much attention, you know how they are. Carrying trash bags, stealing whatever they can. Arguing with Jawas. Nothing else." The Zabrak poured himself a drink and shrugged. "Maybe talk to the Jawas." He joked.

"Yeah, right. They are gonna rip me off." Plog shook his head and left the counter. He was running out of ideas.

...

Her body plopped under the biker speeders, checking the cable hitches, patching up the fuel tube, and reached a small screwdriver from her bag as she adjusts the loose shift gear. Fixing things always made her feel better in any situation. She didn't mind the heat, the sweat, or the oil stains on her clothes. What mattered to her was making the speeder work.

Basic 101 for scavengers was being able to take someone's trash and turn it into a decent vehicle. Stealing was allowed if you didn't get caught. Cantinas were the best place to wait for your next hit. There is always someone that gets too drunk and passes out in the middle of the street.

That was the chance to take the finest pieces fast as you could before others showed up. It was a never-ending battle with Jawas. They were always in groups and worked faster, but if a human was smart enough, it would take the best parts first and leave the rest for the little scoundrels.

Nath didn't think of herself as the best mechanic from her town but, she was a pretty decent one. She kept a low profile most of the time and no one bothered her when she put together speeders or podracers, only if they paid a fair price.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the approaching footsteps and a voice.

"Thirsty?" He spoke and stopped next to the bike. The Marshal looked down at the curious woman and shook a small bottle with water.

"You bet but, I wanna finish this." She peeked out to look at him and return her attention to the bike. Her hand tried to reach a wrench.

"You should take a break, kid." The Marshal lowered down to hand her the wrench and smiled at her.

She puffed her cheeks and rolled her eyes. "Told you, I'm not a kid." She took the tool from his hands. Seconds later, her hand reached out of the bottle.

"Where did you learn to do this?" His eyes studied the bike and the tools around the ground, followed by small pieces from other ships or speeders.

"I was raised by scavengers, learned a few tricks from pilots, and picked one or two things from Jawas." Nath sipped the water. This weather was unbearable at times.

"Ever thought about starting your shop?" He kept examining the items around and, picked something that looked like a knife. It had old blood or oil stain. He couldn't tell by the color.

"It crossed my mind but I didn't worry too much when I worked f..." and she paused before she gave away something else. "Business is hard, you gotta commit yourself to one place and it's not my style."

"Staying in one place is not that bad, at least you can call it home." He shrugged and looked at her working.

"I'm not sure about that. I've been moving around since I was a kid, so home is not exactly something I look for."

"We all need one at some point."

"Not when you are being hunted down." She muttered to herself and tried to change the conversation. "What about you? Why Marshal and not bounty hunter if you have that armor?"

"Long story. But killing for pleasure is not my thing." He admitted.

"And killing in the name of the law is?" She chuckled.

There was a small silence, Cobb kept a serious expression and smirked.

"If they pull, I put them down." He said.

"So, you made your own rules for this town?"

"There's not much to follow, just don't step over your neighbor kinda thing. We look after each other."

"That's interesting. From where I come from, you have to watch your back all the time. I guess that's why I'm not made for places like this."

"You can't tell if you haven't tried it"

"Are you asking me to stay, sir?"

"I'm just saying."

"Sure." She flashed her tongue at him and kept her head down under the bike. Then she groaned when the oil leaked down her clothes and hands. "Dank farrik!" She yelled.

The Marshal chuckled and shook his head. He reached for an old rag to hand it to her. She snatched it from his hand to clean her dirty face.

He couldn't help himself to think that she looked cute with the dirt and oil stains across her fair skin and flushed delicate face. The contrast between those two ideas got him thinking but scratched the idea off his mind when the pale gaze met his.

Her eyes had a peculiar way to look at someone. This time they were friendly, curious about him, unlike last night. He swore that those soft blue eyes were cold and sharp with him, just like ice or whatever it looks like. He never got the chance to leave this planet, but he knew stories about those other worlds and snow.

Nath crawled out from under the bike and thumbed up at him.

"Ready to go, Marshal." She smiled at him.

"Thanks. And you can call me Cobb, you know."

"Well, I like calling you Marshal." She teased him. Cobb chuckled and held out his hand to help her.

She pulled herself up with a swift move but bumped her chest with him. His first reaction was to hold her still and not let her fall. She rested her hands over his chest. Their gazes lock for a moment and they froze right there.

Being close to him allowed her to see his features a little better. Even though his hair was grey already, he didn't look old. She thought that he was trying to look older than he was. She found herself studying his features again. Even breathing was something she didn't dare to do.

Cobb noticed a few looks from the locals and quickly moved his hands away to give her space.

"Good work, kid. I think the boys and I are ready to go." He excused himself and smiled at her.

The redhead smiled back, dusted off the sand from herself, and took the bottle from the ground. She took a large sip to refresh from the heat.

...

The tiny hooded figure just kept studying his speeder and nodding vigorously. He signed those pieces he wanted and, Plog just rolled his eyes. He looked around many times, making sure no one else was watching him with the group of Jawas and took out the small puck. He displayed the image of Nathsca and, they yelled gibberish in anger.

His jawaese was pretty bad yet, he understood briefly that the woman was around taking what rightfully belonged to them, that she had no reason to be a scavenger. They saw her taking off. She left behind most of her belongings but, she clung to an old silver canister. They wanted the canister. It was shiny.

Plog shook his head at them and quickly kept the puck back in his pockets. He paid the tiny hooded figures and pushed them away from his path. Some of them cursed at him but picked the pieces they wanted from the speeder.

A Jawa rushed after him and pulled his sleeve, Plog looked quite annoyed and folded his arms. "What now? I told you, anything you want but It needs to keep working."

The Jawa shook his head and signed at him while he whined. Plog squinted his eyes, listening to with attention, trying to put together all the ideas but he was pretty sure what the tiny one just told him. This was the first time that he met a Jawa that wanted something for himself.

"Off the map, you say?" He lowered to his level. The Jawa nodded as it explained quietly about the lost sandy areas in the west, an old mining place near a small town called Mos Pelgo. People thought it was gone, but this little guy saw the town; just farmers. When the speeders chase down the young scavenger, they were on the path to this town.

Plog slid a bag with credits for the little Jawa that rushed back with his kin but kept the bag for himself.

West. The unexplored dead area. He would go and tell the Captain with the risk of finding lone and empty dunes, taking the risk of getting attacked by the sand people, or worst, a Krayt Dragon. Qod was way scarier than the dragon. The dragon would eat you and, that was it. Qod would take his time to torture you before killing you.

The pale man jumped back in his speeder. He needed to get supplies, fuel, and a blaster. He thought about bringing muscle but, it was hard to trust anyone these days. Lone dunes or not, he was not gonna let some stranger or sand people take advantage of him. Shooting first and fast. Basic survival skills. He gave a second thought about bringing muscle.

tagged for the readers and thanks for reading too :3 : @simpfields @fandoms-will-be-the-death-of-me @sithcajunvalkyrie  @qrangcr  @rachel2003 @wolfangelwings @storytellerandwriter25  @beyond-antares @youmademeanolyphant  @kenobilover1009 

Paint me from the drabble prompts for whoever it fits best?

OK so, you have given me the chance to choose, and I want to give my dear noble Necromancer, Maesta Renata, the chance to shine. She is of orrian descent and this is a bit of the story of how she turned from sheltered lonely noble to adventurer thanks to her 5 silly friends who decided to be the Heroes of Shaemoor.

Those 5 boys are a mashup of characters @disaster-bi-canach and I took from another IP and OCs we developed from that. We decided to move them to GW2 and have fun. HERE is a pic of them all.

The night air was dense with smoke and unanswered questions. Most of the Seraph were quiet, focusing on their duty, and on the noble lady who had entered unanounced along with their Captain. They were observant enough to know that Logan Thackeray was more tense than usual, and that in spite of her gorgeous clothes, the lady had the sweet and metallic aroma of spilled blood all around her.

“A kidnapped noble and a bandit conspiracy in Salma’s district was not what I expected to come from your party, Lady Seserakh“ Logan stated, looking at his desk as if to distract himself of the matter at hand. “It was not my party, Captain”  emphazised Maesta, clearly annoyed at the mere idea “It was Lord Faren’s party, in honor of the heroes of Shaemoor“

Logan sighed deeply “So, a party when the guests of honor do not appear, and the host ends up in a bandit lair rescued by a necromancer. I must admit, it is way more interesting than the noble galas I am used to“ A small smile graced the lips of the noble, and she relaxed a bit, though her gaze didn’t lost its edge. The Captain finally took a file from his desk, and opened it so she could see it; on it were the documents of a dead Seraph called Mario Zeppeli, killed by the Risen years ago. “I assume you knew this man, and if not, I guess you know his eldest son. My men told me you were trying to court him months ag-“

“I was not!“ she exclaimed, the harsh tone of her voice contrasting to her exqusiite mannerisms “I-I mean… forgive me Captain. I… yes, Cesare. I used to be close to him. And as many nobles, I thought myself clever enough to make him settle down. I was foolish however, and I failed“

Her curt answer way too short to disallow suspiscion from the Captain. His eyes closed slightly, too tired for nimble wordplay, Logan decided to be blunt. “He was with me and other adventurers the day of the attack on Shaemoor, and now he is reported to be on Queensdale. But is was not alone: the intelligence you gathered says he and his relatives were the real targets of today’s attack. I need to know who they are, my Lady. I need to know if they are potential assets or potential traitors to Kryta“

Maesta glared at the Captain, but calmed down as soon as she felt the rustle of steel coming from the surrounding Seraph. She sighed deeply, and looked down, sadness making her limbs limp around her. “It is impossible, they can’t be traitors. If anything, they are some of the most noble men I have ever knew. Faren and I expected their return after their mother wrote them a letter, but it seemed they didn’t recieved it, or they just didn’t care…“

Logan felt the creeping sadness taking over her, little by little. The feeling of being forgotten was not something he knew well, but it was hard for him not to be kind, or at least trying. “That we cannot know yet, but there is something more important, my Lady: you said they were good men, but I saw two boys younger than any Seraph in the battle, and I want to know who they are“

He took his own chair and offered it to Maesta, kindly letting her sit and look over his desk. He also took some sheets of paper, along with pencils and a piece of charcoal. “As far as I know, most ladies of your upbringing know how to draw, am I right?“ Confused, Maesta nodded “Well, then I would like you to make a protrait of your friends, and tell me who they are, so I can track them down and ensure they come back home“

Maybe it was the exhaustion, or the melancholy that was shattering her heart, but Maesta accepted, and took the papel and the pencils, making five base models for portraits. While she was doing that, Logan took the liberty to ask for food and drink, and to assure that everything was in proper order around the headquarters.

When he looked back, he could see the portrait of two men on the paper: one was Cesare, the brave guardian that had fought by his side in Shaemoor, the other was a man with longer hair and a whimsical beard, his smile wide, even if his eyes did not reflect joy.

“You already know who Cesare is, the other is Julius. He is an engieneer, and its probably the leader among them all. He and the others are Cesare’s cousins, although they are all around the same age“ Lady Seserakh wrote their names besides their portraits, and added some shadows with charcoal “Julius wanted to be a Seraph once, but he did not enter, although he was in the Academy, and passed all his exams… he is too aware of his duties, and sometimes he can be bossy, but never tyrannical. He and his brothers have the weirdest laughs I have ever heard“ She stated, smiling softly one more time.

Silence engulfed them once more, and this time, Logan looked at Maesta working. A servant brought wine, bread and cheese, and he took the chance to drink and eat a bit before looking at two extremely dissimilar faces: the two boys he had seen fight. One was a lean lad, smaller than any of the other adventurers, his gaze cold as his gestures, strands of his hair falling across his forehead. The other was a larger lad, wide and strong, his long dark hair in a high ponytail. His features were round and soft, with thick lips and shining eyes that showed both serenity and a streak of melancholy.

“The twins. They are the younger of them all, if anything they must be fifteen by now“ She shook her head, stretching her fingers and looking up to the skylight above them “The little one is Alessandro, he is way too quiet and smart for his own good. Taking interest in all the secrets he can find; he loves to hear the stories of how my father and his espionage escapades. Even now, I am scared he is having some stupid ideas about being an information broker…“

The Captain frowned at that: although fifteen was way too young for anything, he remembered the traps well, along with the poisons that the scrawny kid had used against the centaurs. He sounded like a real handful, or a huge asset if he acted the right way.

But the voice of Maesta pulled him from his reveries, back into reality “The big boy is Salvatore. He is a real softie, somehow he adopted a Drake broodmother and befriended her. Ludmila lives in my house, a huge noble lady trapped in the body of a huge fire-spitting creature” The mental image elicited a soft laughter from her, but it died soon “He is too insecure to be out there killing centaurs and getting into trouble, if he is doing so it must be because of his siblings“

The murmur of pencils over paper suddenly filled the space between them; Logan had no idea why, but Maesta had started to draw with an extremely detailed pace. All protraits had a good amount of detail, but there was a depth of detail in the last one that almost shocked him. Long, silky strands of lighter hair, the steady gaze of someone whose thoughts were varied and deep, tight lips and the freckles of youth that somehow did not seem out of place on such a serious and somehow feminine face.

“The red haired mesmer…“ He whispered, marveled at the details of his face. “His name is Lorenzo“ the Lady said, not yet finished with her work “And yes, his hair is longer than any of them. He could be confused with a girl if it wasnt for his voice and the strak line of his jaw. Somehow I thought he was going to apply fro the Durmand Priory; he is very knowledgeable about magical theory… he wouldn’t be an adventure unless there was something new to know…“

A sudden dreamy look on her face appeared, lasting just a second before a nervous smile appeared “Alright, these are the men who fought by your side, Captain. I am sure you want these with the same amount of detail, so give me a moment and I will… you know…“ Her hands moved once more, drawing details that were not there before. Freckles and beauty marks, small wrinkles of laughter or frowns that were not there, details that only someone who loved those lads would be able to remember.

“How did you met them?“ He wondered aloud, noticing the change of guards and the bright moonlight in the center of the room. “We have lived in Salma for years; not only are we nieghbors, but their father is a doctor; he takes care of my father’s health as well as mine. His name is Gregorio, and he knew my dad when both were under service of the Sera-“

She stopped all of sudden, unable to look elsewhere but the paper. When she finally did, her gaze was full of anger, an accusation present in her deep frown. “Their father was a Seraph, he served in the Highlands along with Mario, and recieved and honorary discharge after his death. And I know that their mother had something to do with the Crown, Captain. There is no way you couldn’t know this” Her fists curled, but she did not reach out for her dagger. “You knew all of this, Captain. Am I right? Then why did you bring me here? Grenth’s breath I swear that if you don’t give me an answer I-“

“There is no need to get to angry, child“ A clear feminine voice broke the tension between them. A beautiful woman with exqusiite clothes had entered silently, and now walked to them. Her presence was powerful, even if she did not look as strong as any of the Seraph around her. “Logan knew the names and the faces of your friends, but there are many details that cannot be found in the files of a retired man. He needed information so he could decide if they are hero material, or just some silly boys playing adventurer“

An anwkward silence fell upon them, and it was the woman’s soft cough that made Logan break it. “Allow me to introduce Countess Anise, Master Exemplar of the Shining Blade, and personal counselor to Queen Jennah“ The womam gave a short bow, and Maesta stood up so she could return the gesture. She seemed confused, instead of angry, but her questions lingered in the night air.

“And may I know why someone of your rank is interested in this intel, my Lady?“ She asked with a hint of hesitance in her voice. “Because these lads of yours can be heroes for our Queendom. But to be honest, this is why our dear Logan is interested in them, as for me…“ she stated, looking at the portraits on the table “I am interested in arts. Especially the art of observation. I am marveled at your capacity for detail, Lady Seserakh, especially the depth of your knowledge about people. Also, the fact that you are one of the few non-sylvari Firstborn who has knows something about Orr doesn’t make me any less interested…“

Maesta blushed furiously, but her gestures didn’t betray her intentions. “I think you are talking to the wrong noble regarding social skills. Half of the court thinks I am cursed, and the other half can’t seem to forget that Grenth blessed me with something that terrifies them, and therefore ignores me as much as possible“

The dignity of her statements was broken by a chuckle of the Countess “I am aware of that, child. You are invisible and unwelcomed, far from intrigue, except for the times your dear friend Faren has been your gallant lad in distress. You are also a good book keeper, and your archive is impecable, as far as your dear father has told me. A silent shadow with amazing manners and a diplomatic streak…“ Anise breahted deeply, a proud and charming smile in her face “What I am implying here my dear, is that I am not just looking for intel on your dear friends… I am here to recruit you for the Shining Blade“

A moment passed. And the deep silence was not broken this time. Lady Seserakh lowered her gaze, deep in thought, she closed her eyes for a couple of seconds…

And then, she nodded.

okay you know what, you know what, the day has come, i woke up about 10 seconds ago and i guess i dreamt about a past life where i worked in a sodium factory because i am feeling salty and it’s time for me to talk about all the stuff i hated about wonder woman. if you’re not feeling that, please don’t click below

i get how badly people want canon bi representation but this movie was so not it. this movie wasn’t CLOSE to it.  diana was not shown having any sort of relationship with any kind of emotional depth much less equality with any other woman on themyscira. they all saw her as like, a beloved little niece, basically.  she barely interacted with anyone apart from her mother and aunt, for more than a line or two.

diana had no woman friends the whole movie

i’ve definitely seen (and not read, you better believe i scrolled on by with a scoff) people talking about the diversity of amazons on themyscira but like. giving diana a black nanny who goes running after her to show us what a mischievous scamp she is as a kid? that’s not progressive. having one of the only other black women be an unnamed warrior she fights against, whose only traits are that she’s the Silent Strong Unfeminine Bruiser Tank Lady? and we know that diana has become a true warrior when she can best The Butch One? super... just super DUPER not progressive.

having etta candy be this frumpy, fussy, ineffective suffragette whose only real function is to be exasperated by steve but also love him as a boss? and by extension make non-themysciran women look like silly side characters in the history of the world? ugh.

i saw a different post talking about how badass it was that etta noticed the spies first or something blah blah like. honestly. stop trying so hard. please stop trying to turn a sow’s ear into a silk purse y’all. she was supposed to be the Funny Loyal Fat Side Character who gets a few chuckles out of the audience but has no depth whatsoever.

the entire film erases the efforts of women before and after wwi, both around combat, in government, socially, everything. like every time i think about the fact that diana doesn’t speak to another woman for 95% of the last half of the movie, and these board room dudes act like they’ve never heard of a woman ever DOING anything in their lives, i get hives and want to reread the section of the well of loneliness about women ambulance drivers in wwi. and also to have a shower.

women have ALWAYS been instrumental in their own liberation.

stop making jokes about victorian/edwardian dress being restrictive as if it’s the height of feminism. the history of women and their clothing and how it was liberating and repressive is so much more complex than a stupid joke about her tearing a dress.

like, as if there weren’t plenty of women by wwi who were dressing in “men’s” clothing, and changing the fashions as they saw fit

literally everything about dr. poison like, it’s such an UGLY portrait of so many things

making a women scientist seem Evil and unnatural

associating her disability with her desire to hurt people

making it seem like disabled women hate non-disabled women for being Pretty and Desirable, don’t act like that scene with Steve was meant to be anything other than “see, she’s really just pathetic and jealous because no man has ever wanted to kiss her, look at her”

she was nothing more than a pawn in the end. someone who was easy to manipulate because she was An Ugly Woman

stop saying the movie subverted the born sexy yesterday trope. stop it. every single one of you knows it was 100% that, and nothing but that.  diana talking with naive confidence about how she has read ye olde themysciran porn doesn’t undo that. in fact it only contributes to it because it’s setting her up as someone who knows about sex in ~theory but not ~practice

them giving the Racist Stereotype Side Characters one token line each that humanizes them does not make them fully fleshed out characters. stop talking about Drunk Loud Scottish dude as great representation of PTSD. stop applauding the line about wanting to be an actor but being the wrong color in a movie that is so. so. so white.

one line vaguely referencing white people’s horrific genocide against native americans, one that never comes back and has no repercussions on the story, is just not good enough. also, not gonna mention slavery or anything? not even a bit? ok.

also stop saying the movie subverted the male gaze, you guys saw diana’s outfit. i saw so much of gal gadot’s thighs. and i’m gay, my dudes, i was into it. i loved it. but it’s not like this movie didn’t objectify women. you know that it did. stop trying to make it not what it is.

also, stop saying the scene with steve was only ~the female gaze. i have less ground to stand on for this one because not an atom of my body has ever or will ever find anything about chris pine desirable but that scene was played in a way that would be appealing to certain men

ohhhh it’s a naive beautiful woman gazing at his penis and she’s ~never seen one before, and he just lets her look, like you know there are creep-ass dudes who were into that, and it was ultimately just one scene and he was fully modestly clothed the whole rest of the movie.

looovvveee is the only remedy against waaaaaarrrrrr someone fucking kill me.

i mean i’m a sap but “the answer was love all along” isn’t really a conclusion that flies for me in a movie dealing with a nonfictional war that happened for complicated economic political and social reasons involving nationalism and capitalist greed and all kind of shit, lots of actual people actually died, its’ not like OH NO WHY DIDN’T ONE OF THEM REMEMBER TO LOVE????

david thewlisface ares? stupid.  like using him in that flashback? not a good call.

those glasses steve got diana were so fucking LAUGHABLY not time period accurate like he just got those from warby parker a week ago it’s supposed to be 1918 or whenever the fuck at least try a goddamn little bit

diana’s costume should have been more colorful and the texture of her armor was weird and looked bad

i don’t know a whole lot about wonder woman but it’s 10000% rather go back and rewatch that two-parter from justice league where diana becomes Gal Pals with that princess who is about to marry vandal savage and has to rescue her, that was better in almost every conceivable way than this film

“maid of honor” season 2 look it up just sayin it’s on netflix

i’m really glad a lot of you found a lot of things to love and be happy about in this movie but honestly it’s exhausting seeing people on tumblr contorting themselves to talk about how it’s A Revolution, Never has there been Anything Like This About a Woman when yes, there has, and done better

love the movie if you want! i enjoyed it a lot! i saw it twice

but stop acting like part of the process of loving it is to say that it is diverse, or progressive, or any of this shit that it’s so. not. 

this article is great go read it. i don’t agree with ALL the points necessarily but damn. good and brutal.

please, like i’m begging you please. just go watch xena. shhhh. shhhh i know. the foley is cheesy the production values are really low on the first few seasons and yes it’s not like xena never fucks up on race stuff because hoooo boy. but like. xena is 7 seasons of a woman warrior kicking ass in a vaguely ancient greco-roman world, and it has 10000% more interaction BETWEEN women, and women who are campy villains not just because of disabilities, and there’s so much homoeroticism and heart and badass flipping and it’s just. it’s so good.

it will heal your heart. it will make you realize you deserve much much much much more than the crumbs that wonder woman gave you. go watch xena instead.

"The Mainland" | Father Ted | Series 3 Episode 4 | Dead Parrot

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/the-mainland-father-ted-series-3-episode-4-dead-parrot/

"The Mainland" | Father Ted | Series 3 Episode 4 | Dead Parrot

Come on Dougal flip off the video okay that’s a quality exhibit though is not it he’s mad at me i do not believe it he mentioned which one were you gazing however we get a form of 1 foot within the grave where you are looking at huh so that you simply completed looking at it don’t recall anything from us i do not suppose it that is what he said hurry up we’re off to the mainland ray why it’s go to the betting shop to collect my winnings 200 pounds and father title writes within the limbo competition cause they don’t know is there anything flawed along with his again and he normally walks like that i do not suppose it whats up JB unnecessary Oh Dougal you higher get that mended there’s a whole factor to Tokyo tank-prime particularly dead i do not think it haha notable yeah can we go to the caves in after we go to the betting store will we go will we please say 5050 we go to the king outstanding go to the cave i do not feel i don’t consider it quality now not now father we’re going to the opticians and rounds kid don’t forget you get you a fine pair of glasses we should all be very cautious on the mainland there may be numerous crime round i’m sanna some muggers in every single place my friend mrs.O’Dwyer was once robbed last week oh no did they get a lot no truth i do not believe you have an understanding of she used to be robbed they stole her horrible factor when an historic individual are not able to even stroll down the avenue for worry of being stolen come on Google I don’t want in the actor me father that you can drop me off right here correct so hi there father evidently howdy mrs. Danube we shot mrs. Janine we will have a bit of a chat there correct so i do know God Google would imagine spending any more time with up Oh 200 significant ones Dougal what Oh God Ted i’m so completely happy the sun’s out and we’re in an optician I don’t know any better than this acquired it I just bear in mind something it is got to have any breakfast we get from it later don’t worry oh god i’m so hungry there’s no development i couldn’t die might I from The hunger i don’t believe so not for a few hours anyway i’m completed now father well I ought to say i’m pressured these eyesight seems to be higher than ever before he learn right all the way down to the very last line and even I are not able to see that one I consider i know what happened you see father Jack has a great fondness for saying that unique word oh I failed to understand endorse unit that I cost definitely I bought a three with a promotional crater Carlsberg hiya you Randy like a plate of chips or a burger a couple of chops i am out of my head with the starvation no i’m going to just get the other chart so what was the great last period answers no suggestion he used to be long past out of the apartment for a few minutes when he got here again they have been long past he cannot appear to maintain on to a pair yo lady you have got got your scar I farted that is going to make the effort very well we are going to head off so come on Google we go to the top pray now father this chart was given to me by savatya most effective lens producers throughout industry you remember this expertise fast she used to be on her method to the shop the other day and a man came over to her and killed her and retailer her pen this is where they believe so they’re maintaining her in for assessments good you understand what occurred instructed mr.Candy some younger fellas broke into his apartment and began messing with him and for the reason that of rock on him Oh God negative mr. Sweeney he wasn’t like this at all I heard the world over 200 cases of forced transvestitism worried in the city last year what’s the world coming to something proper now a further be taught this used to be its director ooh kiddo yes your man from one foot within the grave dee I do think it man oh good that’s effective looks from there you understand he’d be aware of what recognize so he came as much as me and stated his catchphrase oh yeah he is your fuck you must without doubt do that though oh yeah I said no person ever does that who you believe you’re hilarious you already know this is this sort of times once I certainly a hundred million percent certain that you just’d be doing the right factor i will be able to say should you say you without doubt obviously won’t remorse doing that i’m going to do it jail we’re like yeah go on holy hey good what did he say did ya no snow no nothing i am going to sit down now oh god no I could by no means be a kind of have a gauzy euros I didn’t be aware of my historic straight I heard it on snap after which it was once just a case of mendacity on high of them except the hills too proper we higher be off mrs.Doyle I get it oh no mrs. Chickenfoot by the way I get it no nods don’t be silly I think you will not put that away now do not be stupid mrs. Doyle no no no no now just put your money away you’re mad no no no no I reckon that stage I was once consuming over a pint of vodka a day sure yes all I would feel about was once where the next drink was coming from drink I failed to give a damn about my wife our youngsters yeah no with your whole support i’m coming through it i’m simply taking it at some point at a time thanks Ronald now I notice that we’ve a brand new member of the workforce with us in these days Heather would you love to tell us your story satisfactory proper unusual to let all of it out great it’s so actual so proper and this right right here is surely granite how lengthy would that be there Oh many thousands of years relatively as long as that some judges fascination how come all the rocks are one of a kind sizes that we all know what stated on the whole one-of-a-kind size good how discovering there are all kinds of things I in no way knew about rock of path at the time most of this whole field would have been submerged underwater how did everyone breed a couple of reason all right Wow look at that rock over there well this is absolutely the oldest part of us or at this specified table shaped greater than fifteen million years in the past oh wow i’m going to open it up a little early to say so that is okay that’s okay so long as i don’t must hear that bloody catchphrase again oh i will certainly got here on this right k i am so hungry i’m starting to hallucinate and do adult exaggeration and discontinue worrying we get a human let’s slide this way will you do the fandango about the lightning very very horrifying me gallileo gallileo figaro Magnifico oh i am only a bad boy no one loves me but from a negative household say from his existence from this monstrosity effortless come easy go will you let me go fast no let me go – Mila with just a little procedure oh no no no no no no no no no individuals on the desk to make a decision for me for me for me as I was once saying I feel the object to do is to try and in finding an exit before the caves closed for the night good proposal Charla how long have you ever been in right here two days now father I consider it’s two days we have now been having a fine laugh Maya I just think that is it truely everybody would like to get out of here and get some instances get residence okay screech the loudest let’s have a screeching competitors as Albert JP is your purpose I received ample father oh go on aah easy I particularly believe we must believe about looking to get editor Oh God possibly you’re right we do not get out we write up the convenient each and every other there’s no place like that cinema live with an enthalpy in money after which the bees all their neighbors seem amazing Tony don’t when you go oh no get off me i am now not useless yet hello pickle boy but i am hungry Tony i am gonna tackle oh no go we go together with your he would not you Tony ha ha sure Tony’s dance good my feet Tony why did you return it concept it used to be our only Son today i guess the funeral cannot be going some hoops is healthier to not my shut up shut up shut up shut up what good I’ve in no way I’ve under no circumstances Tony i am putting you on my list of enemies there you are in entrance now Tony ah Holies k so am i able to learn you miss me come on let the feminist with a screeching competition to intend I do see Glover go go on is handy ah I quite wouldn’t try this no ah it wasn’t me and harbor token and but consider would not you that anybody like criticism used to be extra enjoying round with the likes of honor and you’d be proper he did not wish to hand your hours of the intention good day i go mad yes sorry no rather not worried about being trapped under that massive pile of rocks discontinue it is all she want you here to keep me company and the most up-to-date group might be back which ends with any moment they say they were just going to seek out the tour advisor 10 mi was once buried beneath a gigantic pile of rocks and are available correct again that’s four tickets to Paraguay however I favored English nation’s very complicated and a long way fetched and very very boring that is my style of movie I just like the piano as good did you see Harvey Keitel walking around within the meat one can find that shit hate leaving those we’re doing a no just right sitting around taking note of him screech please please be trustworthy onto that huge pile of rock let’s let’s get ourselves that we are able to worry about no then God where is that this anger tank of eternity can reduce a woman’s bra it’s after unraveling oh my god dougela we are able to to find our approach backwards you have undoubtedly snagged on something if we use this we will give you the chance out appear like God circles with me out no time should you be willing to get off like that or should we not be following it what well what use will or not it’s when you’re finished winding it all achieved don’t feel us correct French thanks thanks the indoor father I will not mean you can do it I know it hurts but believe me you’re going to thank oh thanks excuse me there is any person buried point out he’s alright however I fairly suppose you should get somebody in there rapidly thanks please hurry come on do ladies wish to get away before the rescue come on to the relaxer or food to be right here in a minute hey hiya is that father trillion yes this is him we’ve got been seeking to contact you all night time are you aware a mrs.Dyle first identify mrs. Choi do i do know a mrs. Joy sure yes sir she’s our housekeeper well i would like you to return all the way down to the police station she’s been in a spot of drawback listening if there’s a pleasant or something i know come on Dewey Huckabee eita father Jack out of jail i am very very sorry you should not have a lasagna or a fowl courier no ok good might be I simply have a bag of chips and i might have a fan tour injured wealthy did you know the place you might be there is a police station correct and if that’s the case i will just have the bird satay and Pinot I just hope you don’t think this sort of factor goes on always we’re now not all criminals and troublemakers in the church you already know i’m hoping this is not going to put you off going to mass i am a Protestant surely father rather the straight option father he does they pay a 200-pound plane or they spend the night in the cells well I shouldn’t have that sort of money on me she’s probably in the situations and great in the cells perhaps the simpler alternative off to go hiya it will be quieter I was once simply all proper all proper right here here here is your blood cash but just let me say this there used to be a time when the police on this nation have been acquaintances of the church do not driving bills cost parking tickets or no longer even a blind eye to the odd murder but now almost convinced I gave them the money why don’t you do what presupposed to one of the crucial pleasant good I did they’re pleased once again you could have made me appear like the whole extra frontal real people thank you so much correct to be sincere head I forgot I had the money I was once going to claim your fly’s open god – what did I say there’s at all times challenge for me go to the mainland I have got to make a ordinary under no circumstances ever going again there once more on that is totally unavoidable which it isn’t sadly you and bassam’s ladies they make the Rockies

"The Mainland" | Father Ted | Series 3 Episode 4 | Dead Parrot

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/the-mainland-father-ted-series-3-episode-4-dead-parrot/

"The Mainland" | Father Ted | Series 3 Episode 4 | Dead Parrot

Come on Dougal flip off the video okay that’s a quality exhibit though is not it he’s mad at me i do not believe it he mentioned which one were you gazing however we get a form of 1 foot within the grave where you are looking at huh so that you simply completed looking at it don’t recall anything from us i do not suppose it that is what he said hurry up we’re off to the mainland ray why it’s go to the betting shop to collect my winnings 200 pounds and father title writes within the limbo competition cause they don’t know is there anything flawed along with his again and he normally walks like that i do not suppose it whats up JB unnecessary Oh Dougal you higher get that mended there’s a whole factor to Tokyo tank-prime particularly dead i do not think it haha notable yeah can we go to the caves in after we go to the betting store will we go will we please say 5050 we go to the king outstanding go to the cave i do not feel i don’t consider it quality now not now father we’re going to the opticians and rounds kid don’t forget you get you a fine pair of glasses we should all be very cautious on the mainland there may be numerous crime round i’m sanna some muggers in every single place my friend mrs.O’Dwyer was once robbed last week oh no did they get a lot no truth i do not believe you have an understanding of she used to be robbed they stole her horrible factor when an historic individual are not able to even stroll down the avenue for worry of being stolen come on Google I don’t want in the actor me father that you can drop me off right here correct so hi there father evidently howdy mrs. Danube we shot mrs. Janine we will have a bit of a chat there correct so i do know God Google would imagine spending any more time with up Oh 200 significant ones Dougal what Oh God Ted i’m so completely happy the sun’s out and we’re in an optician I don’t know any better than this acquired it I just bear in mind something it is got to have any breakfast we get from it later don’t worry oh god i’m so hungry there’s no development i couldn’t die might I from The hunger i don’t believe so not for a few hours anyway i’m completed now father well I ought to say i’m pressured these eyesight seems to be higher than ever before he learn right all the way down to the very last line and even I are not able to see that one I consider i know what happened you see father Jack has a great fondness for saying that unique word oh I failed to understand endorse unit that I cost definitely I bought a three with a promotional crater Carlsberg hiya you Randy like a plate of chips or a burger a couple of chops i am out of my head with the starvation no i’m going to just get the other chart so what was the great last period answers no suggestion he used to be long past out of the apartment for a few minutes when he got here again they have been long past he cannot appear to maintain on to a pair yo lady you have got got your scar I farted that is going to make the effort very well we are going to head off so come on Google we go to the top pray now father this chart was given to me by savatya most effective lens producers throughout industry you remember this expertise fast she used to be on her method to the shop the other day and a man came over to her and killed her and retailer her pen this is where they believe so they’re maintaining her in for assessments good you understand what occurred instructed mr.Candy some younger fellas broke into his apartment and began messing with him and for the reason that of rock on him Oh God negative mr. Sweeney he wasn’t like this at all I heard the world over 200 cases of forced transvestitism worried in the city last year what’s the world coming to something proper now a further be taught this used to be its director ooh kiddo yes your man from one foot within the grave dee I do think it man oh good that’s effective looks from there you understand he’d be aware of what recognize so he came as much as me and stated his catchphrase oh yeah he is your fuck you must without doubt do that though oh yeah I said no person ever does that who you believe you’re hilarious you already know this is this sort of times once I certainly a hundred million percent certain that you just’d be doing the right factor i will be able to say should you say you without doubt obviously won’t remorse doing that i’m going to do it jail we’re like yeah go on holy hey good what did he say did ya no snow no nothing i am going to sit down now oh god no I could by no means be a kind of have a gauzy euros I didn’t be aware of my historic straight I heard it on snap after which it was once just a case of mendacity on high of them except the hills too proper we higher be off mrs.Doyle I get it oh no mrs. Chickenfoot by the way I get it no nods don’t be silly I think you will not put that away now do not be stupid mrs. Doyle no no no no now just put your money away you’re mad no no no no I reckon that stage I was once consuming over a pint of vodka a day sure yes all I would feel about was once where the next drink was coming from drink I failed to give a damn about my wife our youngsters yeah no with your whole support i’m coming through it i’m simply taking it at some point at a time thanks Ronald now I notice that we’ve a brand new member of the workforce with us in these days Heather would you love to tell us your story satisfactory proper unusual to let all of it out great it’s so actual so proper and this right right here is surely granite how lengthy would that be there Oh many thousands of years relatively as long as that some judges fascination how come all the rocks are one of a kind sizes that we all know what stated on the whole one-of-a-kind size good how discovering there are all kinds of things I in no way knew about rock of path at the time most of this whole field would have been submerged underwater how did everyone breed a couple of reason all right Wow look at that rock over there well this is absolutely the oldest part of us or at this specified table shaped greater than fifteen million years in the past oh wow i’m going to open it up a little early to say so that is okay that’s okay so long as i don’t must hear that bloody catchphrase again oh i will certainly got here on this right k i am so hungry i’m starting to hallucinate and do adult exaggeration and discontinue worrying we get a human let’s slide this way will you do the fandango about the lightning very very horrifying me gallileo gallileo figaro Magnifico oh i am only a bad boy no one loves me but from a negative household say from his existence from this monstrosity effortless come easy go will you let me go fast no let me go – Mila with just a little procedure oh no no no no no no no no no individuals on the desk to make a decision for me for me for me as I was once saying I feel the object to do is to try and in finding an exit before the caves closed for the night good proposal Charla how long have you ever been in right here two days now father I consider it’s two days we have now been having a fine laugh Maya I just think that is it truely everybody would like to get out of here and get some instances get residence okay screech the loudest let’s have a screeching competitors as Albert JP is your purpose I received ample father oh go on aah easy I particularly believe we must believe about looking to get editor Oh God possibly you’re right we do not get out we write up the convenient each and every other there’s no place like that cinema live with an enthalpy in money after which the bees all their neighbors seem amazing Tony don’t when you go oh no get off me i am now not useless yet hello pickle boy but i am hungry Tony i am gonna tackle oh no go we go together with your he would not you Tony ha ha sure Tony’s dance good my feet Tony why did you return it concept it used to be our only Son today i guess the funeral cannot be going some hoops is healthier to not my shut up shut up shut up shut up what good I’ve in no way I’ve under no circumstances Tony i am putting you on my list of enemies there you are in entrance now Tony ah Holies k so am i able to learn you miss me come on let the feminist with a screeching competition to intend I do see Glover go go on is handy ah I quite wouldn’t try this no ah it wasn’t me and harbor token and but consider would not you that anybody like criticism used to be extra enjoying round with the likes of honor and you’d be proper he did not wish to hand your hours of the intention good day i go mad yes sorry no rather not worried about being trapped under that massive pile of rocks discontinue it is all she want you here to keep me company and the most up-to-date group might be back which ends with any moment they say they were just going to seek out the tour advisor 10 mi was once buried beneath a gigantic pile of rocks and are available correct again that’s four tickets to Paraguay however I favored English nation’s very complicated and a long way fetched and very very boring that is my style of movie I just like the piano as good did you see Harvey Keitel walking around within the meat one can find that shit hate leaving those we’re doing a no just right sitting around taking note of him screech please please be trustworthy onto that huge pile of rock let’s let’s get ourselves that we are able to worry about no then God where is that this anger tank of eternity can reduce a woman’s bra it’s after unraveling oh my god dougela we are able to to find our approach backwards you have undoubtedly snagged on something if we use this we will give you the chance out appear like God circles with me out no time should you be willing to get off like that or should we not be following it what well what use will or not it’s when you’re finished winding it all achieved don’t feel us correct French thanks thanks the indoor father I will not mean you can do it I know it hurts but believe me you’re going to thank oh thanks excuse me there is any person buried point out he’s alright however I fairly suppose you should get somebody in there rapidly thanks please hurry come on do ladies wish to get away before the rescue come on to the relaxer or food to be right here in a minute hey hiya is that father trillion yes this is him we’ve got been seeking to contact you all night time are you aware a mrs.Dyle first identify mrs. Choi do i do know a mrs. Joy sure yes sir she’s our housekeeper well i would like you to return all the way down to the police station she’s been in a spot of drawback listening if there’s a pleasant or something i know come on Dewey Huckabee eita father Jack out of jail i am very very sorry you should not have a lasagna or a fowl courier no ok good might be I simply have a bag of chips and i might have a fan tour injured wealthy did you know the place you might be there is a police station correct and if that’s the case i will just have the bird satay and Pinot I just hope you don’t think this sort of factor goes on always we’re now not all criminals and troublemakers in the church you already know i’m hoping this is not going to put you off going to mass i am a Protestant surely father rather the straight option father he does they pay a 200-pound plane or they spend the night in the cells well I shouldn’t have that sort of money on me she’s probably in the situations and great in the cells perhaps the simpler alternative off to go hiya it will be quieter I was once simply all proper all proper right here here here is your blood cash but just let me say this there used to be a time when the police on this nation have been acquaintances of the church do not driving bills cost parking tickets or no longer even a blind eye to the odd murder but now almost convinced I gave them the money why don’t you do what presupposed to one of the crucial pleasant good I did they’re pleased once again you could have made me appear like the whole extra frontal real people thank you so much correct to be sincere head I forgot I had the money I was once going to claim your fly’s open god – what did I say there’s at all times challenge for me go to the mainland I have got to make a ordinary under no circumstances ever going again there once more on that is totally unavoidable which it isn’t sadly you and bassam’s ladies they make the Rockies

I'll Kick Your Ass! I'll Kick My Fiancee's Ass! I'll Kick My Own Ass! (9/11)

From: DeanK@nsj

To: All Students

Aloha, everyone!

I know some of you might be thinking that spring semester is a misnomer when the ground is so covered in snow, but I assure you all that before long the snow will melt, the buds will bud and suddenly you’ll all be too warm to think straight, instead of too depressed like y’all are now!

[Lists of activities this semester, including a concert and de-stressers before finals week]

I wish to be transparent with you all when I admit that the case of the illegal duels has gone cold over winter break. If anyone has any information regarding them, please come to my office any time between 4 and 5pm Monday through Friday, or send me an e-mail. I promise that your identity can be kept a secret if you so wish.

On that note, have a cool semester!

Koadchi’s Journal,

Amir Kahn

Senior. Captain of the rythmic gymnastics team.

I sent her an e-mail over winter break,

And she actually replied.

She’s sweet.

But she’s still trying to sell me on gymnastics.

Says we’ll need a captain when she’s gone.

Says I have what it takes.

Says I have perfect form.

Says I have drive.

Says I’m right about how the sopranos should have ended.

Says her mom’s a good cook

Talks and talks and talks

And I all I want to do is listen

She wears oversized red flannel

She fought Ranma for Akane

Everyone wants to know if she likes girls

I want to know if she likes me.

From: NabikiTendo

To: TKuno

YOU CHODE

All those flowery words and you purposely misinterpret things? Katara was supposed to be with Zuko! ‘Too dark’? How about writing a show about a global war where massive destruction and genocide took place? Is that too dark?

Zutara is thematically consistent, but they watered down the ending for people like you who think everything has to fit into neat little boxes.

From: TKuno

To: NabikiTendo

Nabiki Tendo, I would admire your insistence on thematic consistency if you hadn’t begun this debate by declaring that Zuko and Katara would have ‘hotter’ sexual encounters.

I still say that the true beauty in a sexual encounter is how it acts as an extension of the relationship. For some reason many people insist on portraying sex as gritty and dark, but Katara and Aang could likely have fantastic sex because they would have it on crisp bedsheets, in a well lit room, with ample time to enjoy each other.

From: NabikiTendo

To: TKuno

Life isn’t always, ‘crisp bedsheets’ and ‘well lit rooms’, Kuno-babe. Sometimes it’s damp caves or fluorescent lighting. That’s when you want someone with you, and that’s when Zuko would be there for Katara. That’s why Kataang is so unrealistic. If you can only get it up for someone on a bed made with clean sheets can you ever really be there for them?

Facebook Messenger

Akane: Fight Ranma Again

Ryoga: No one wants to see that.

Akane: Fight Ranma Again

Ryoga: Who cares if I fight Ranma? You know, if you want to go out on a date all you had to do was ask ;)

Akane: This is no time for winky faces. Either you fight him or I do.

Ryoga: I think I’d like to see that.

Akane: You wouldn’t. Even when we’re trying to be nice we hurt each other. You don’t want to see what happens when the kid gloves come off.

Ryoga: What’s wrong? What did he do to you?

Akane: He fucked me up, that’s what. He got my emotions so twisted up I want to punch him and patch up his wounds. I want to scream at him and then cry and then scream some more. I want him to feel stupid and scared and angry.

Akane: I want him out of my life. Permanently.

Ryoga: Okay, before you hire a hit man, have you tried to talking to him?

Akane: I don’t want to talk to him. Talking to him made me think I liked him.

Ryoga: Why’d you stop liking him, then?

Akane: I talked to him some more and realized he only cares about himself and what’s best for him and what his dad tells him to do. My feelings don’t matter. He can kiss me and then forget about it. He can make me dream about mysterious men and better versions of him and then trample them.

Akane: Please fight him so I won’t have to.

Facebook Messenger

Ryoga: I want to duel you again.

Ranma: Tonight. Field behind the science building.

Ryoga: Isn’t that a little dangerous?

Ranma: You’re right. We should do it on the basketball court in the gym. Hell, let’s smoke some weed, and have an orgy while we’re at it! We can invite Dean Kuno! He’d have a blast!

Ryoga: What did you do to Akane?

Ranma: Liked her??? I KEEP TRYING TO PROTECT PEOPLE AND THEY KEEP SAYING I’M BEING SELFISH. I’M TRYING SO FUCKING HARD OVER HERE.

Ryoga: You know, there’s a difference between protecting someone for their sake and for yours.

Ranma: Who you ripping off there? Goethe?

Ryoga: I’ll fight you. But first I have to tell my girls I love them.

Ranma: Plural? WAHAHAHAHA. Go ahead, but tell them that when it comes to beating you up we gotta take turns!

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Dear Akari,

I’m sorry I lied to you. I’m sorry I ignored you so I could keep chasing other girls and not feel guilty. I’m sorry I held on to you like a safety school. I thought I was doing you a favor, but I was just jerking you around. I was talking to someone today and I realized I wasn’t telling you I’d fallen for someone else because I didn’t want to deal with you. Which is probably why you got as pissed as you did and killed my phone and…all the other things you did.

Also, I’m sorry I thought some mystical connection with another girl made it okay to treat you like shit. I’m not sorry about believing in mystical connections, but I feel a little silly. I mean, you can meet someone and instantly feel good around them. Right away you think they’re cool and you want to know them better, but then you have to get to know them better. Maybe that means you fight about sitcoms, or their exes, but I think that’s a lot more important for the whole falling in love with someone thing than just deciding they’re the most amazing person ever. That’s pretty detrimental to it, actually.

My point is, love can sneak up on you, but break ups shouldn’t. I let you be the last person to know that I was going to dump you, and that was really shitty. Thanks for not letting your pig eat me.

Love,

Ryoga Hibiki.

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Thanks.

For finally being honest.

(And not calling the cops on me)

Akari.

—You thought you could make me better/And I hoped it’d turn out right/You know I’d sell my soul to change it/But we’re out of time

Gymnastics Team Group Chat///Jumping Gymnasts

You didn’t hear it from me, but there’s another duel on.

Ranma and that guy he’s fought already.

Kuno?

The other one.

What is wrong with these guys?

I dunno, but I need a kick tonight. I’ll be there.

Me too.

Cap?

Will you be there captain?

It’ll be a club event!

Say you’ll come cap!

Cap!

Cap!

Cap!

Okay, Jesus. I’ll be there. Though, I’ve got to say, I’m a little disappointed all of y’all don’t have better stuff to do.

And what are you doing cap?

Nm. I’ll be there.

Shampoo’s phone——> Ukyo’s phone

Did you hear? Ranma

and Ryoga are fight-

ing tonight.

                                                                        Seriously? Didn’t school just start?

Eight P.M. Behind

the science build-

ing.

                                                                        See you there?

You bring the ice pack

I’ll bring the bandages?

                                                                    Sounds like a plan. I swear, if  Ryoga

                                                                    gets hurt over Akane…

Why? Are you jealous?

                                                                     Jealous? It’s a snowy hill in the dark.

                                                                        I’m worried he’ll break his neck!

So you don’t care who

Ryoga dates?

                                                                        No? I mean, it would suck if he

                                                                        pulled that ‘my girlfriend comes

                                                                        before anyone else’ thing on us.

That’s such bullshit.

What would you think

if someone put you

before everyone else?

                                                                         I think you should be checking

                                                                         our first aid kit, not making

                                                                         up riddles.

The Daily Times Post              All the news we can report                  February 1st

                                     THE WEIRD AND WILD

Cologne Clueless

A man at a nearby law firm is currently engaged in a large legal battle over what he deems to be wrongful termination. Another employee reported him for consistently coming to work reeking of marijuana. He claims that what his colleague mistook for smoke was actually the scent of his very expensive cologne. He is expected to bring several bottles to court, but he’s not sure how he will light up in the court room…For comparison purposes, of course.

Deuling Downfall

It’s been a while since we’ve had any impressive catastrophes from our local adolescent angst farm, Nancy Sullivan Junior, but recently four freshmen were taken to the hospital en masse due to an incident involving an illegal duel preformed on slippery terrain behind one of their science buildings. What was the fight over? Only the most time honored instigator of fights there is—the hand of a beautiful young lady.

Mixtape Mixup

Local club XS was dead silent this Friday night, except for the sound of Cotten-Eyed Joe, a song which had accidentally slipped into the dj’s playlist and left it’s audience cold, as well as momentarily motionless.

MY DIARY

Once, when I was a younger man, my father took me to a production of Macbeth at NSJ. It was small and low budget but well done, by which I mean that the witches' scenes were phenomenal. They were unearthly, cackling shrilly as their bodies contorted into painful postures. They rooted me to my seat, partly out of appreciation for their performance, and partly because I was worried if I drew too much attention to myself they would leap upon me and tear the meat from my bones.

I thought that once the witches departed from their final scene there would be no more magic for the evening. Then Macduff’s wife appeared, laughing gaily and playing with her son. I recognized in her gait and the cut of her chin the woman who had only a few scenes before been a bent and haggard witch.

It is truly something to see a witch shed her skin to reveal the woman underneath. A woman of kindness and civility, and then dire vulnerability as Macbeth’s men sent her to her grave. It is a magic all it’s own.

No no no, this simply will not do.

There is something I must admit to you, gentle reader, with no further ado, allusions, or passionate ramblings.

I kissed Nabiki Tendo.

Akane’s Diary

I don’t know how this happened.

That’s not true, I know I know it, but the pieces won’t come together in my mind. It still feels like things shouldn’t have gone this way. Like I’m living in that totally blown out of proportion worst case scenario that you think of for a a second before shaking yourself and saying it could never happen.

Ranma isn’t very big is he? It isn’t the hospital bed being huge and playing tricks on me, he’s never been that tall or wide. Hell, I’m taller than him. Still, when he’s up and angry he can add five inches just by standing right and staring down at you. Asleep and covered in bruises he looks like half the man he usually is.

I don’t know why I sent Ryoga that message. I’m not sure if I don’t want to be engaged to Ranma because I hate him, or if I don’t want to be engaged to him so I can do things that might lead to us being engaged. I fell back on Ryoga, and now he, Ranma, Kodachi, and Ukyo are in the hospital. And the only one who deserves to be here is me.

Nabiki is here too. She’s pacing like she wishes she wasn’t, and I’m writing because it feels wrong to be dicking around on my phone or doing anything other than explaining how this is all my fault. Genma was called, and we called dad so he knew. We also told him Ranma might be expelled, since we aren’t sure if anyone has told Genma that. I wonder if it’ll happen before Ranma even gets out of the hospital. Dean Kuno is here to be with his daughter, and I can’t tell if that counts toward Ranma’s time being officially enrolled or against it.

Nabiki says she’s going to find the cafeteria, although I think she just wants to stretch her legs. Good. I want to be alone.

I should write this out so I don’t forget it. This is going to be on me forever, so I should at least have the details straight.

I almost thought this fight was going to be cool. Ranma posted something about it on face book and tons of people showed up. More than I think have been there for any other fight. It was kind of cinematic, all the dark people milling around under crystal clear moonlight, glittering on the snow.

Ranma and Ryoga circled each other for a few minutes, feeling out the terrain more than each other. The snow was thick but powdery, and I felt safe that there wouldn’t be too much slipping. Some people were smoking, and the acrid scent made everything feel sharp.

Ryoga made the first move. He flew at Ranma so fast I was shocked. Even Ranma was caught a little off guard. He dodged though, and spun to make an attack. Snow flew up and caught the light. For a second, this seemed like a good idea.

Ryoga took some of the kick, but managed to turn so a lot of the force bounced off of him. He tried to grab Ranma’s leg, which was a mistake. Ranma punched him and Ryoga recoiled. Ranma went in for another strike, Ryoga jumped back. Then he went to the left, which I thought was a little weird, because he lined himself up for a hit. He ducked left again and I saw that he was leading Ranma to the edge of the slope that rolls toward the science building. I started to worry. With the help of some slippery snow Ryoga could launch Ranma off the edge of the plateau we were on.

Ranma didn’t notice. All he wanted to do was hit Ryoga as hard and as fast as he could. Ryoga was taking blow after blow, but he kept leaning left, and Ranma kept following him.

Then Ranma did a spinning kick. After all the punches he’d been throwing Ryoga was caught off guard. Ranma’s knee slammed into his stomach so hard everyone winced. He fell to his knees.

“Time!” Ukyo screamed. She broke out of the crowd and ran into the part of the ground that had become the ring. She planted herself in front of Ryoga, who was still shuddering on his hands and knees. He looked like he was going to throw up.

“What are you doing?!” Ranma yelled at her.

Ukyo didn’t flinch. She leaned into Ranma and said, “I’m keeping you idiots from hurting each other.”

“You want to fight me?” Ranma was fuming. He would have grappled with a hungry rottweiler if we’d thrown one at him.

“This isn’t how we’re supposed to solve problems anymore.” Ukyo said. “We don’t throw down behind the science building, or in the parking lot off the basket ball court.”

“This is the only way to solve problems.” Ranma spat. “I’m sick of trying so hard to fuck with people’s feelings. All that happens is that we still hate each other, we just pretend we don’t and try to be nice or whatever the fuck, and we sit on all this anger and hate and we smile and want to kill each other.” For a second something flickered over Ranma’s face that wasn’t rage, but it was gone too fast to say what it was. “I can’t do that. I’ve got to be honest. You want Ryoga to tap out, fine. But you’ve got to take his—“

Ukyo kicked him across the face. I don’t know if Ukyo does martial arts, but she’s definitely kept up on her flexibility exercises. The bruise along Ranma’s left temple is a purple negative of the bottom edge of her boot.

Once Ukyo got on the offensive, she stayed there. For a minute I thought she had Ranma cornered. Only he wasn’t shaken. He was plotting how to trip her up. He sent her to the ground and jumped on top of her.

I could see that purple haired girl I talked to once helping Ryoga up. He was a little too heavy for her, as unsteady as he was on his feet, and she motioned to a group of admirably muscly girls for help. One of them was Kodachi, wearing a flannel shirt that fit her so weirdly I’m pretty sure it belonged to the taller girl standing next to her. I don’t know why seeing Kodachi made me spring into action but it did. She reminded me that we were all going to have to explain the bruises, and possible bloodstains on the snow tomorrow. I ran to the other side of the ring and threw myself onto Ranma’s back. He screamed, but between Ukyo and I we managed to grab enough of his limbs to keep him still.

He wouldn’t stop screaming, though. Kodachi appeared at my side and started grabbing at us. I don’t know if she was trying to free Ranma or help restrain him, but when he lurched sideways she was knocked over, crashing into Shampoo and Ryoga—who had been walking towards us for some reason, even though the part of the ring we were in was nearer to the science building than the dorms.

It was also closer to the edge of the hill, and that collision sent us sliding down. At first we were just slipping, but when we struggled to pull ourselves up we gained speed, and soon we were shooting down the hill.

Stupid fucking north-east school with rolling hills.

We crashed into a tree stump. At least, the clump with me, Kodachi, Ranma, and Ukyo did. Shampoo and Ryoga went farther before they hit a tree. I think I was unconscious for a minute, crushed between Kodachi and Ranma.

Maybe longer? I remember crashing and then campus security showing up. I’m not sure how much time passed between that. Then there were ambulances because Ryoga and Ukyo were out cold and Ranma had a huge, jagged cut on his arm. Also, I heard the only thing Kodachi was wearing was that flannel shirt, and she took a few bumps to the head, so they put her in an ambulance too.

Nabiki’s back. The cafeteria has cream horns??? She got me one. She’s really flustered. She got lost a lot on the way.

It’s pretty good. The cream horn. I feel kind of sick, but also like I should eat. I guess there isn’t much we can do right now. I want to track down Dean Kuno and confess that this is all my fault, but I think he should have some time with his daughter first. Also, if I talked to him right now he’d probably want to kill me rather than expel me.

Is it bad if I’m tempted to let him?

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Fuuuuuuuuuuukkkk………Whyyyyy….

He was so freaked out. Pale and somehow tiny in his huge, puffy coat. Then he took it off and his sweater was too big, his sleeves covering his hands, and I started at him like I’d never seen a human male before. He looked like he was going to cry. His sis is okay, but he kept asking me stuff like, ‘What was she thinking?’, ‘I heard she wants to quit gymnastics. From someone else!’, ‘Should I have seen this coming?’.

Tatewaki Kuno. Taking responsibility. For something that wasn’t even his fault.

His hair was standing on end cause he kept fucking with it. It’s so thick.

I mean, I was worried about Ranma, but I knew it was his own damn fault. I didn’t feel like I didn’t even know him anymore. Kuno was on meltdown mode.

I just wanted to calm him down. I went to shake his shoulders, I was going to slap him like a hysterical woman. I’ve always wanted to do that…

But then I was holding him by the shoulders and looking into his eyes and whispering stuff? And then I was holding his face, and then I was kissing him. It was supposed to be short.

It was long. And slow. I could feel my heartbeat, but it wasn’t scary like when you’re full of adrenaline. It was like awareness spread out from my chest and I could feel every inch of my body. And every inch of his.

Then we stopped kissing and just breathed for a long time.

Too long. I had to get to the cafeteria. I asked Kuno if he knew where the cafeteria was and then I ran away. Like a coward.