#the shit that goes on behind the scenes. it's like genuinely mind boggling | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

zagorodnik · 2 years

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Lol even if I was a petty teen I don’t think I would’ve written a song shit talking anyone I knew online or irl bc I wouldn’t think they’d be worth it, tho I would’ve prolly said something like “exes am I right” If it seemed like a song about someone

Tho I’m surprised there aren’t more “diss tracks” out there lol (paranoia aside id think someone would have to be full of themselves to think some song is about them lol)

Yeah, I get you—I've written a couple, but I don't think I'd ever write one and publicly release it again. I'm kinda at a point where I have enough of a support system that if I need to process my feelings about something, I have someone to talk to. I don't actually remember much of 2020, so I'm not sure what headspace I was in when I wrote Adam. I just knew I wanted to improve on Eve's composition, and that January was particularly tough on me, so I ended up writing about what was going in my head.

I do think that Eve was a pettier move—I'm obviously not gonna get into details because it should remain a (mostly) private thing and it was fucking retarded of me to bring it half-public, but there was miscommunication and I guess I partially wrote it to share my side of the story to the other person (considering that we had stopped talking at that point). I remember being egged on to make it a little bit, but I think that might not actually be true and I might be thinking of something else, instead.

Then if you've been around since I was 14, you probably remember Pity Party, which. Lol. I'll give myself a pass on that one 'cuz I was 14 years old and petty 14 year old drama is just like that. I do think it was a really dumb decision on my part, but I think a lot of areas in the vocaloid community really are like that (or at least were in 2018). Of course, I am sorry for making that decision and think Zion didn't deserve whatever harassment that got him, but hindsight is 20/20, I guess. I'm not in contact with him anymore anyway and have no desire to be.

I do have all the files for all three of these songs still (I recently discovered Pity Party's files in a few disorganized places) and I do mess around with their compositions, but anything I do with them probably won't be released publicly. I'd give you a reason if I had one, but I think the biggest one is that I just don't give enough of a fuck nor do I want to have to deal with drama in the vocaloid community to that scale. Or ever, really, but I guess you can't help it when you've been in the circles I have.

#answers #my darling nonny #the vocaloid community is honestly the worst one i've ever been in #and that's coming from someone who hung out in like #tumblr sjw communities in 2016 #i'll be thankful for the good times i had but like. i'll never be active again #im certain anyone who remembers the vocaloid community back then understands and probably agrees lol #the shit that goes on behind the scenes. it's like genuinely mind boggling #i like obviously am not gonna start airing out dirty laundry but it's really weird when you realize that like #the people calling your friends (or friends of friends) out are like. right a weird amount of time #and about the weirdest things. things that seem normal while you're there but when you really start to think about it it's like #genuinely if this happened in real life or in any other community people would be like lol wtf is wrong with this person #yknow? idk #i try to remember mostly the good things because i don't want to become too like bitter a person over it #but it's really hard when you're only just now processing all the stuff you didn't realize was weird #anyway i'll stop fucking blogging in the tags now. my bad i didnt realize it was gonna be this much

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lanzhanlanzhan · 5 years

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This is a Wang Yibo Appreciation Post

Okay, first of all, whoever was responsible for even considering Wang Yibo as Lan Wangji ought to get an award. I mean look at this boy

Who looked at him and thought, "Yes! A perfect Lan Wangji!" It boggles the mind. In fact, one of the funniest things I found when the series was first aired was UNIQ fans belatedly realizing that Lan Wangji was being played by Wang Yibo. The whiplash must have been something because the gap is just unreal.

I remember that back when news came out that there would be a live action adaptation of MDZS, not a lot of people were behind Wang Yibo being casted as Lan Wangji. I would even admit to being one of the naysayers, and if I delve deep into this trash bin of a blog, I would probably find something I said last year that was along those lines. Mind you, this was in stark contrast to how people reacted to Xiao Zhan; most people liked him, thought he looked great as Wei Wuxian, and he just got a lot of approval on the get-go. The promotional posters that came out though just did not really do Wang Yibo justice. As Lan Wangji, he did not look the part, he seemed quite young, who even was Wang Yibo, or if you knew Wang Yibo, like really, Wang Yibo? And so on and so forth.

The great reveal though is that apparently, Wang Yibo is the kind of guy you just have to see in action. The moment I got into him playing Lan Wangji? I was sold. I was so sold I would willingly eat my shoe for everything I ever said about CQL casting back in 2018. That face, the look? Picture perfect. His manner, his restraint, the way he conducts himself in fight scenes? It was sheer genius casting a dancer for the kind of grace required to pull off the esteemed Hanguang-jun. I love Wang Yibo's Lan Wangji and knowing what I know now, if you give me another actor to play Lan Wangji, I would stab him in the eyeballs, I am not kidding. Don't give me anyone else other than Wang Yibo.

Now, Xiao Zhan has proven time and again that he understands Wei Wuxian, and the great thing is he is articulate about it. I think it's pretty well known that this boy makes entire speeches and writes legit essays when asked about Wei Wuxian. We love that about him, and I think this is also why he is so popular with the fans. We don't get as much of that from Wang Yibo, but much like how it wasn't until we saw him in action that he proved why he was a fitting Lan Wangji, the same could be said here. He does understand Lan Wangji. How do we know? Because it just shows. I find that appreciating this boy is in seeing him just do things. I remember how it was when, with each episode that passed, people just started noticing how Lan Wangji—poker face extraordinaire—was behaving in each of his scenes. We went, "Was that--? Holy shit, yes, it is?? How is this actor pulling off these micro-expressions? How is it that we are actually getting emotions from Lan Wangji??"

This went on up until a lot of us slowly realized, "You know what? This is a really good Lan Wangji we have here."

The Untamed also gave us a lot of promotional and behind-the-scenes content, so let's talk about that, too. There is something refreshingly genuine with Wang Yibo that I don't think I often see in many celebrities. It could be because he's young, but that just makes it more impressive how well he is performing on-screen. Out of costume though, he doesn't seem to have many filters, and it is such a riot following him and listening to the kind of shit he says in interviews (and taking note of how the "more adult" Xiao Zhan reacts to them).

Besides, a drama with two guys as leads? This could have easily been a recipe for clashing egos. While whichever actors playing Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji would find themselves being called the "two male leads" of the show, the fact of the matter is, Wei Wuxian's character is defined by his actions and his convictions. He fights against something larger than himself, and in this sense he is the typical hero of a story. Lan Wangji, meanwhile, is defined by his devotion to Wei Wuxian.

People get compared all the time, rankings are a thing, and product endorsement usually can only afford one popular celebrity as a brand ambassador. One could very easily be the actor who resents Lan Wangji's popularity being dependent on Wei Wuxian, and thus be considered "secondary" to Wei Wuxian. But instead, and despite all the wrong ways things could go, we got chemistry on screen and camaraderie behind the scenes. Wang Yibo favored Xiao Zhan and did not compete with him. It probably helped that Xiao Zhan is older (thank goodness for Asian values), but then Wang Yibo has been a celebrity for longer. Again, it could have gone badly.

I cannot stress enough how important it is to me that Lan Wangji's actor likes Wei Wuxian. It's not by any means a necessity, but a wonderful, wonderful bonus to all this—because what self-respecting Lan Wangji wouldn't adore his Wei Wuxian? We got cute banter behind the scenes, with Wang Yibo even seeming to be most partial to Xiao Zhan and generally being playful with him despite having a reputation of being cold to co-stars. He genuinely seemed to have had a lot of fun with his co-actor. I do not ship them nor do I follow RPF, but I find that them having that amiable and sometimes affectionate atmosphere does wonders for my own shipping of Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji. It's like everything just feels safe and good, and my boys are happy together in all iterations of their universe.

I will always be thankful to these actors for interpreting these beloved characters so respectfully, especially given the nature of Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji's relationship. With the threat of censorship being a very real thing for them, I'm glad we still got the bond—and yes, love—between Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji in the scenes they share on-screen. (Actually, I sometimes wonder if Wang Yibo's, uh, violence towards Xiao Zhan is a remnant of Lan Wangji's affection for Wei Wuxian that Wang Yibo hasn't shaken off after they end a scene, lol. What's a guy to do with those feelings, right?)

Anyway, this accidental meta was brought to you by all these goodbye posts with CQL ending. I reiterate all the "thank you's" to the cast, but really for me, my appreciation goes most of all to our unexpectedly excellent Lan Wangji. I said so much shit about him last year, but he ended up being my absolute favorite of the cast. Wang Yibo took Lan Wangji and brought him to life in a way I never thought I needed, and now holy hell, I am churning up fanfic like mad every week. It has been such a wonderful journey, and never have I more sincerely wished success for any show's actor as much as I do for this boy. I was so, so wrong about him, but boy, never have I been happier for being proven wrong.

#lol what the hell is this #this is what happens when you don't make plans on a friday night #meta #accidental anyway #my fingers slipped #too many feels what with the show ending #wang yibo #lan wangji #chen qing ling #the untamed #mo dao zu shi #cql #mdzs #lanzhanlanzhan #basically me admitting i have been so so wrong #i'm sorry #and thank you lan zhan

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