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thechaoticdruid · 5 hours
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[This Bites] 7
Astarion x F! Chubby MC
Plot: Winnie and Astarion attend the carnival in hopes to get information on a certain mysterious modder.
Content/Warnings: Violence, touching without consent, clowns, a special guest, death threats, near death experience, choking.
Chapter 6: Here
Chapter 8: I don't fucking know man...
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The screams of people riding the roller coaster filled the air. Winnie held Astarion’s hand as the group walked across the carnival grounds. Astarion who'd been rather enthusiastic about going, now seemed rather unsure. Winnie assumed he was more excited about going on a date than the date itself.  Astarion’s hand tightened around Winnie’s as they passed a rather eerily looking clown who was putting on a show for some children, juggling sparklers. His eyes looked over to them for a split second. Winnie shook her head and decided to ignore the strange person and focus on what she came for. 
“So erm…. Anthony I was really wondering if you could maybe help me. Becca said you're a modder and you might know  the person who made this BG3 cheat engine.” Winnie took out her phone and showed him a screenshot of the cheat engine file she took with her laptop. 
“Hm ... .Oh yeah I chatted with him before over discord.” Anthony replied, not looking back at the short female, too distracted by all the sights and sounds.
 “Babe, look! A haunted house, let's go!” Becca exclaimed as she took hold of her boyfriend’s arm.
“Oh alright I'll come with so you don't get scared” Anthony winked at Becca before taking her arm.
“I don't know what you're talking about, you're the one always getting scared.” Becca teased back before looking at Winnie. “Come on Wyn! Let's go!” 
“Yeah okay.” Winnie replied.
“So we're going to hunt for spirits?”Astarion hummed.
“No. It's not real. Just people in costumes jumping out from behind the corner to scare people.” Winnie explained.
“Oh? Well that's considerably more boring.” Astarion huffed. 
“Hey, don't hate on our fun! We don't have magic and dragons like you do back home.” Winnie playfully punched him in the shoulder. 
“Very well let's go then.” Astarion smirked and followed Winnie towards the ‘haunted house’ ride.  The attraction was set up to where you'd get  and ride through a fake haunted house. Winnie and Astarion sat behind Anthony and Becca as the car slowly moved along. For the most part the vampire was unimpressed. Being much too perceptive he could always tell when someone was about to jump out.  
“Hmm…That's a poor hiding spot.” Astarion mused as he noticed a man in a bloody pig costume hiding in the shadows.  The man jumped up causing Anthony and Becca to scream. Astarion stared boredly, an arm wrapped around Winnie’s waist as she tensed up, startled.  The vampire caressed his beloved's back comfortingly. He honestly relished the thought of taking a protective role. It made him feel strong, valued, like he had a purpose. 
“Oh now he's just lying on the floor, tut tut tut. You can do better than that.” Astarion tsked before a man in bloody clothes leapt up and screamed at the cart.  The vampire rolled his eyes before looking back at Winnie. She didn't scream at the attempts to scare them like Becca and Anthony did, but she would tense up or flinch.   Astarion leaned in and whispered in Winnie’s ear, “There’s another idiot hiding behind that door over there.” 
Suddenly a man in caked in white costume makeup with fangs and fake blood all over his face jumped out from behind the door hissing and getting way too close to Winnie’s face for the pale elf's liking. Astarion’s eyes narrowed a bit before he punched the ‘vampire’ in the jaw.  
“Why the hell did you do that for?” Winnie asked, looking at Astarion in confusion.
“He was getting on my nerves and he got far too close for my liking.” Astarion huffed.
“You can't just punch people because you want to! You're going to get us in trouble.” Winnie said with a look of worry. 
“Don’t fret love, I’ll handle any ire that comes our way.” Astarion replied.
“That's what worries me.” Winnie rolled her eyes. 
“Sweetheart, everything worries you.” Astarion sassed. Winnie pouted as the carts came to a stop outside the haunted house. They got out and Winnie silently thanked God that somehow miraculously Becca and Anthony missed Astarion's little outburst.
 The group walked away from the attraction as Astarion glanced over to see that creepy clown from before. He began clinging on to Winnie as he glared at painted face fool.
“It's just a guy in make-up Star.” Winnie said, running a hand over his back comfortingly. Astarion huffed a bit as they kept walking, the clown disappearing amongst the crowd of people.
“It's hideous.” Astarion murmured quietly.
“So Winnie I have a question, how did you and Star meet?” Becca turned to Winnie with a curious look. 
“Oh you know…We…um…” Winnie tried to think up something quickly.
“My darling and I met at the beach. I needed some assistance fending off this disgusting beast.” 
“It…was a really big crab.” Winnie added, rubbing the back of her neck nervously. 
“It was monstrous, but Winnie smashed the little wretch with a boulder, my sweet little hero.” Astarion hummed before looking at Winnie fondly. 
“It was a very small boulder.” 
“Well that's…..interesting.” Anthony hummed as he and Becca stared at them awkwardly, clearly thinking their story was ridiculous. 
“AH LOOK BUMPER CARS!!!” Winnie said, trying to change the subject as she pointed at the ride. 
“Ooh that actually looks fun.” Astarion said as his red eyes trailed over the scene of people smashing into each other. 
“How about we have a little playful competition against the ladies?” Anthony suggested as he looked over at Astarion. 
“Oh, you two are on!” Becca exclaimed and grabbed Winnie’s arm, “come on Wyn let's go kick some ass!”  Becca dragged Winnie off before she could  comment and Astarion rolled his eyes and followed after Anthony.
Eventually the two pairs got separated in the line with at least ten people between them. Winnie looked back, worried about Astarion doing something chaotic while she wasn't within range to intervene.
Astarion glanced back in her direction, he wasn't exactly torn up about their separation, but he would have much preferred trying this activity with Winnie instead of Anthony whom he knew nothing about.  Anthony looked Astarion over for a moment before he spoke. 
“So…Winnie seems nice.” He hummed aloud. 
“She is absolutely wonderful, my Winnie.” Astarion hummed with a content smile. 
“Okay…I mean she's not around bro. You don't have to go all out.” Anthony chuckled.
“All out? I mean every word.” Astarion huffed, “don’t you feel the same about your Becca? She seems very taken with you.”
“She's aight. Pretty hot and good in bed.” Anthony said nonchalantly.
“Oh, well lucky you then.” Astarion rolled his eyes. Meanwhile Winnie was standing with Becca, looking back at the others with a nervous gaze. 
“Maybe we should see if we can squeeze into line with the boys…So we don't get separated?”
“Nah it's fine, there should be enough bumper cars for them to join us.” Becca stated, her eyes looking over Winnie curiously observing her gaze. 
“You're staring at him.~” The redhead said in a sing-songy tone.
“He has a tendency to get into trouble.” Winnie said honestly. 
“You sure you're not just disappointed he's not glued to your side like normal?” She teased. 
“You act like he's hanging on me 24/7.” Winnie chuckled.
“Isn't he? Whenever I've seen you two he follows you around like a lost puppy.”
“You've seen us together like twice before today.”
“And I have amazing intuition. So…Have you two….you know…?” Becca smirked.
“I'm not having this conversation.” Winnie rolled her eyes.
“Whaaat? I was just gonna ask if you two had kissed! Don't be weird about it!” The redhead teased making Winnie turn bright red.
After a few minutes they climbed into the cars. The bumper cars were brightly colored and had both a driver and passenger seat in each of them.
Becca and Winnie got into one, Becca in the driver's side and Winnie in the passenger seat. However before they could even get buckled up, they were slammed into by Anthony and Astarion.  Astarion smirked mischievously as his fingers curled around the steering wheel.
“Star!? What the hell?” Winnie hissed.
“Sorry darling, I've never controlled one of these things before aha!” Astarion giggled with a mischievous grin.
“Oh it's on! Let's get him back!” Becca exclaimed, steering the bumper right into the guys. The group giggled and teased each other as their cars would collide. Despite the fun eventually Winnie had to usher their little group away when her vampiric partner began to slam the car into some obnoxious children. (One whom so rudely exclaimed “out of the way old lady!”) 
Once the four had left the ride Astarion slipped back beside Winnie. Anthony seemed to follow after Astarion however. 
“So…Make a new friend?” Winnie asked glancing over at Astarion and Anthony. 
Astarion wrapped an arm around Winnie and pulled her off away from Anthony until the two of them were out of earshot.
“Friend isn't quite the right word I believe, but nevermind that while I was alone with him in line he mentioned that the creator of your modification lived nearby in some city called Varamont.” 
“Varamont? That's like a five hour drive from here.” Winnie rubbed her temples. “I'm not sure I could stand riding for that long on my bike.” Winnie said with a sigh.
“Come on Winnie we're going into the mirror maze!” Becca called as she and Anthony caught up with the two. 
“I think I'll sit this one out actually.” Astarion spoke up. 
“Ah yeah…He gets a bit claustrophobic!” Winnie added. 
“You ladies go on in then. I wanted to get some food anyway.” Anthony piped up. 
“Okay….” Winnie said as Becca dragged her off into the mirror maze. Winnie followed after her reluctantly as her friend continued to talk her ears off about mundane things. They had a lead on where ShadowMommy69 was. Things were going well. So why did Winnie have this gnawing feeling something bad was going to happen? 
She sighed as her and Becca walked through the maze occasionally bumping into a mirror once and a while.  “Becca…Is everything okay with Anthony? I mean he is your boyfriend but it seems…like he's avoiding you.” 
“Anthony can be a bit reserved, but he's really a sweetheart.” Becca replied. Winnie frowned, Anthony didn't seem to have any problem hanging out with Astarion. She wasn't quite sure he was a good match for Becca. As much as she admired her friend, Becca had a bad track record when it came to dating. Winnie could recall that the redhead's last girlfriend apparently maxed her credit card and her parents had to help her with the debt. She really didn't have the best judge of character when it came to romantic partners. Not that Winnie could really talk considering her first boyfriend was a bloodthirsty undead creature of the night, but at least Astarion payed attention to her. A little too much sometimes. That wasn't his fault though. The man barely had anything to do while he was cooped up all day to avoid the sun's rays. 
As Winnie and Becca continued walking through the mirror maze the two ended up taking different paths. Winnie being distracted by her thoughts and Becca distracted by chattering about her own boyfriend. Eventually the girls were separated in two totally different parts of the maze. Winnie was even pulled out of her head by her nose bumping against the cold glass of a mirror.
“Shit…Where'd she go? Becca!?” She called, looking around as she got no answer. The lights that illuminated the maze from above flickered a bit. And Winnie felt a chill go down her spine. 
It's okay. Everything is alright. We’ll just find our way out. 
Winnie could feel her heart speeding up as she carefully maneuvered through the maze. However each turn and path seemed to go on forever. Winnie couldn't even tell how long she'd been in here! She quickly took out her phone as she began to get nervous only to find that the battery was dead. 
Okay…Maybe this isn't so great…
Suddenly she noticed a shadow move across one of the mirrors. Winnie nearly jumped at the sight of it, backing up fearfully. Then suddenly there was a voice.
“Ah, we finally meet in the flesh.” A familiar looking brunette haired man suddenly appeared in front of one of the mirrors, his reflection appearing in all the surrounding ones. It took a moment for Winnie to process who this was.
“Raphael?! What the hell are you doing here!? I'm pretty sure I killed you!” Winnie gasped in complete and utter shock.
“And yet here we are face to face.” The devil chuckled as Winnie began to back up. “I should actually thank you, you know. If you hadn't pulled Astarion out of our dreadfully repetitive world I would never have been able to find a way out.”
“Shit. I knew something bad was going to happen. You…You better not s-start any trouble!” Winnie said, trying to act intimidating though deep down inside she was terrified. 
“What trouble? I'm simply here to explore this new realm much like your toothsome companion. Besides, you have other things to worry about.”
“What do you mean?” Winnie asked with worry. 
“Astarion and I are not the only ones who've found a way to enter your domain. The person who caused this opened far more doors into your world than he intended.” Raphael spoke in a calm tone. A smile etching its way onto his face.  
“Why are you telling me this?” Winnie raised an eyebrow with suspicion.  
“Because you are of interest to me and without this knowledge you'll likely meet a very early demise.”
“If you're planning to use me to do your dirty work you must be desperate. You realize I'm no fighter. Hell I'm not even an advent-” Before Winnie could finish her sentence the devil disappeared without a trance. “Oh you Asshat! I was talking to you!”  Winnie huffed, looking around for the devil, but he was gone. Raphael showing up was bad enough but the thought of others coming into this world was horrifying. Dragons, mind Flayers and God knows what else could appear and there was nothing Winnie could do about it. She was literally just a retail employee! 
“I need to find Astarion.” Winnie murmured to herself.
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
Astarion had been waiting outside, trying to keep to himself as best as he could. The carnival goers were all looking more delectable by the minute. He could feel the ravenous maw inside begging, no, demanding to be sated. 
“Hey Star.” Anthony called as he returned from getting some food. “Damn, the girls sure are taking their time aren't they?” The dark haired male hummed. Astarion looked up, red eyes immediately noticing the pulsing vein on the human man’s neck. He gulped nervously, doing his damnedest to ignore the urge to tear into Anthony's throat. 
“Oh…I-I'm sure they'll be back soon.” Astarion said with a huff, his eyes looking away from the other male. 
“Hey, you alright?” Anthony asked.
“I'm fine. Just a bit cold.” Astarion lied and looked back towards the mirror maze. The vampire tried to keep his mind focused on Winnie, knowing well that she'd allow him to feed once they arrived home. But then he suddenly felt an arm wrap around his waist. He looked back and noticed the other male was getting far too close for comfort.
“Hey why don't we ditch the girls? I think the two of us have more in common anyway.~” Anthony said with a smirk before suddenly Astarion shoved him off. 
“Touch me again and I'll choke you with your own innards.” He hissed. 
“Whoa hey! Calm down! There's no need to pretend here. I know you're just pity-dating that girl, it's kind of obvious.” Anthony exclaimed, causing the vampire to narrow his eyes at him.
“Pity-dating? Ha! Darling, if I was going to court anyone out of pity it'd be you. Now stay the hells away from me before I rip out your throat.” Astarion snarled, his eyes were beginning to glow red, as he bared his fangs. This set off alarm bells in the human man’s head. 
“J-Jesus Christ!” He cursed and backed away. The vampire pushed back the urge to drain the male dry as he stepped away, beginning to retreat to a less populated space. His eyes then suddenly perked up at the sight of caged pigs off inside some tent. 
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
After stumbling through the mirror maze Winnie bumped into Becca once again. 
“There you are, Wyn! God, I thought You left for a moment!” Becca exclaimed. 
“Becca! I need to get out of here and talk to Star! It's important!” Winnie said. 
“Shit. Did something happen? Are you okay?” Becca asked, placing a hand on her shoulder.
“I'm fine…I just need to talk to him about something personal, okay.” Winnie stated. Becca nodded in understanding.
“Okay. Let's go, I think I found the way out.” Becca grabbed hold of Winnie’s hand so the two of them wouldn't get separated again before she led her he down another path. Winnie could spot scratches and smudges on the mirrors, as if someone had already left a trial to help guide them out. Eventually they reached the end of the maze and stepped out. Not a moment sooner chaos broke loose as pigs began to charge across the fields in front of them.
“Fuck sake!” One of the carnival workers yelled.
“Someone let loose the pigs!” Winnie and Becca looked at one another in complete and utter bewilderment. As the carnival workers rushed to wrangle their swine, one began to slowly approach the two girls. It was the clown Winnie had seen earlier.  
“Ladies, may I speak with you for a moment?”
“Uhh…We're a bit busy at the moment! S-Sorry.” Winnie blurted out before suddenly the make-up caked stranger began to move in. 
“What's the hurry!? There's a show starting soon. Come and see!” The clown chuckled.
“She said we're busy.” Becca spoke louder and stood in front of Winnie.  The clown cracked his neck before suddenly grabbing a hold of both their arms.
“Hey get the fuck off us!” Becca shouted as both her and Winnie began to flail and attempt to pull away, but the clown was surprisingly strong. 
‘Let us go!” Winnie shouted, eyes scanning the area for passerbys but it seemed the whole pig fiasco had distracted anyone who could have helped.
Winnie suddenly kicked the clown in the shin, making him release them. The two of them bolted as the stranger began his pursuit.  
Fucking hell this is like something out of a horror movie!
Winnie panted and huffed as Becca moved ahead of her. The slender female was able to keep more distance between herself and the creep chasing them. Winnie could feel her ribs and legs burning. She didn't think she had enough stamina to keep going. The clown chased them back into an empty tent when suddenly Winnie tripped, falling onto her hands and knees. She winced, feeling blood dripping down a cut on her knee. Winnie scrambled to get back up as the clown lunged at her grabbing hold of her by the throat. Winnie gasped for air, gripping onto the clown's large hands 
“Winnie! Get off her you creep!” Becca shouted and ran back towards the clown. The red head leapt into his back and grabbed hold of his hair, yanking it hard and even tearing a chunk out, causing him to shout and let go of Winnie before moving to throw Becca off of him. Winnie fell to the ground holding her neck as the clown moved to strike at Becca. The redhead looked up with wide eyes before suddenly something sharp pierced through the clown's chest from behind, causing blood to pour down onto the ground as the carnie fell to the floor.  Astarion stood there clawed fingers dripping with blood as he quickly turned his attention to Winnie who was still rubbing her throat. 
“Winnie! Winnie my sweet, are you alright?” Astarion looked down at the human woman with fearful eyes as she rubbed her throat. She gave a small weak nod. 
“Y-You just shoved your fingers through that man h-how!?” Becca began to stutter out. Astarion ignored the redhead, his attention was on the marks on Winnie's throat. 
“Arghhhhh!” A loud snarl suddenly filled their ears. The clown corpse began to stand back and change, growing bigger and bigger. Suddenly a large blue skinned humanoid beast with long tusks and glowing eyes.
Shit. The devil was right.
Winnie mentally cursed as Astarion stood in front of her protectively. Blood was still dripping from the wound in the creature’s chest. The creature growled down at the trio. The silver haired vampire bared his fangs at the beast. He was unarmed but he'd be damned if he let some filthy creature hurt his beloved and get away with it. While the beast was slowed by its injury he took the opportunity to attack. 
“Ignis!” He launched a firebolt straight into the monster’s face. The beast roared in pain as its eyes were blazing. The stench of burning flesh filled the air.  The beast quickly turned tail and darted out the back of the tent, disappearing into the night.  Winnie got back to her feet, taking a few deep breaths. Astarion peeked out through the back of the tent to make sure it was go before returning to Winnie’s side.
“Magic…He just did magic!?” Becca sputtered out. Winnie sighed and rubbed her temples before looking over at Astarion.
“I'm going to assume that's not normal here.” Astarion spoke up. 
“No, definitely not. I was actually looking to warn you about this kind of thing earlier.” Winnie replied, her voice sounding a bit croaky from nearly getting choked out. “I ran into Raphael in the mirror maze…”
“The devil is here!?” Astarion asked aloud.
“Devil?!” Becca exclaimed.
“Yes. He said when you came here others did too, himself included. I imagine that monster was one of them.” Winnie said.
“Would someone please tell me what's going on here!?” Becca demanded.
“Ah….Right…This is all probably going to sound insane.” Winnie sighed.
“Everything that's happened today has been insane. We just got attacked by a god-damned clown monster-thing and your boyfriend chucked a fireball at it!”
“Yes ... .Um…How do I put this…..Hm…Becca this is Astarion…I uh…pulled him out of my computer about a month ago after downloading this messed up cheat mod.” 
“Ah…Hello.” Astarion gave her an awkward little wave. Becca just stayed silent for a moment, eye twitching at the insanity of it all. 
“This is a dream. I fell asleep while getting ready for the carnival and Anthony is going to wake me up any moment now.” Becca spoke to herself as she tried to rationalize the situation.
“Oh I doubt he'd stay long enough to realize you were asleep.” Astarion muttered under his breath. 
“I thought it was a dream at first too, but after a couple of weeks I didn't wake up.” Winnie said softly.
“How is this possible?” Becca asked.
“Honestly I have no clue. I've actually been trying to the bottom of this. This is why I need to find out who made that mod. I'm certain it's behind everything.” 
“I need to take some time to process this. I'm going out to my car…” Becca said before walking off, looking rather shaken up.  
Winnie stepped out of the tent with Astarion slowly following behind her.
“It looks like the number of people who know our secret seem to be growing.”
“I wouldn't worry too much about Becca. She knows how crazy this all sounds, she's not going to go tell someone. Shame all hell broke loose tonight.”
“Gods I'm glad I was able catch a whiff of your blood before it was too late. I….I should have been with you…. I'm sorry…” Astarion pulled Winnie into his embrace.
“It's alright Astarion, there's no way you could have known we were going to get attacked. I had no idea there was any danger until I met with Raphael.”
“What did the devil want?” Astarion asked.
“I'm not sure. He kind of just showed up to warn me. That in itself seems very suspicious.” 
“He wants likely wants something from you, no doubt.” Astarion furrowed his brows. 
“I can't imagine what. I'm not a fighter, I can't go and kill anyone for him. Could it be my soul he’s after?” 
“Maybe…But I have a feeling it's not as simple as that.” The pale elf huffed before looking at her neck once again, gently cupping her cheek.The marks were turning into bruises.
“You sure you're alright?” 
“I am, just…sore…Are you alright? You still need to feed?” Winnie asked before moving up the sleeve of her jacket to expose her arm. Astarion gently pushed it away declining.
“No. I took care of that, besides you've been hurt enough today.” 
“Astarion, I wish I could protect you instead, but I'm not an adventurer or a hero. Suppose I'm just going to end up being a burden.” Winnie sighed.
“Darling, you do enough for me already. You practically feed, clothe and put a roof over my head. Keeping you safe would never burden me my love.” Astarion slowly wrapped his arms around Winnie, pulling her into a hug. Winnie returned it nuzzling her face into his neck. 
“We should return home. Get something for your bruises.” Astarion pulled back. 
“Okay…..and thank you…For saving me Astarion…” Winnie wasn't exactly sure what came over her. She definitely wasn't one to initiate affection very often being as shy and timid as she was, but in that moment nothing else seemed to matter. Winnie leaned up on her tiptoes and pressed a soft, chaste kiss upon his lips. Astarion was slightly taken back for moment but almost immediately returned the gesture leaning into it.
Winnie quickly pulled back as she realized what she'd done, her face flustered and full of embarrassment. What was she thinking!? She didn't even ask for fucks sake!
“I'm sorry! I should have asked if it was-” Astarion grabbed hold of her hips and pulled her back into a kiss. This one was more passionate, full of longing and need. It seemed Astarion wasn't satisfied with Winnie’s sweet little peck. The brunette was a little at a loss of what to do. She'd never been kissed before. Not in romantic sense anyway. She did her best to try to mirror his movements before he eventually pulled back and rested his forehead against hers.
“Took you long enough.~”
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
Apologies for the wait! I've been rather distracted since the last chapter, but here it is! The monster in the chapter was an oni btw. It's a shapeshifting monster in DnD.
~Druid
@seradyn , @plimsim , @astarioffsimpmain , @marcynomercy , @iamsexytrash , @gaymistakeboi , @divineknightmare , @tinyfreakgirl , @misscrissfemmefatal, @gianchan-de @jaksfanficsaver , @the-disaster-in-waiting , @hp-art-studio , @im-just-a-simp-le-whore , @dajeong , @iamnotokei , @the-pale-elfs-love , @geminipridekitty
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thechaoticdruid · 1 day
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👀
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Commission for @garnering-grins with their Tav, Tayla, and Astarion! GOSH!!!!😍😍 This time I had a BLAST with this piece!!! 🥰 I was so in love with the pose and the setting!!! I'm such a sucker for sunset time, also! 🥺❤️ Thanks again for commissioning me! ❤️❤️
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thechaoticdruid · 1 day
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Happy Pride from Vesperr and Bekk 👬👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏳️‍🌈
(We'll likely be seeing more of them once my Winnie series gets to act 2.)
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thechaoticdruid · 2 days
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Sorry I just can't get behind the Astarion is actually vanilla headcanon with a lot of the freaky shit he approves of. Yeah I'm pretty sure he probably treasures the opportunity to be sweet and tender with his lover but like he's still a freak. (Not as much of a freak as Gale is of course but still).
Astarion literally has dialogue implying he likes seeing the player tied up ("You look good, helpless.") Lol.
Like I don't understand why some of y'all think this man can't do both.
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thechaoticdruid · 2 days
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♥️🥺😭😭
Vampire lullaby - bg3 comic, S.Astarion
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I was thinking a lot about if I should upload this but...I guess I stopped caring haha~ I hope you enjoyed
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thechaoticdruid · 2 days
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🤭👀🍑
happy pride month to astarion’s juicy ass in those tight pants
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thechaoticdruid · 2 days
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Ngl chapter 7 of This Bites is pretty random and chaotic.
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thechaoticdruid · 2 days
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So close to finishing Chapter 7 of this Bites and my brain suddenly starts acting like:
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thechaoticdruid · 3 days
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Okay so my writing plans are.
•This Bites Chapter 7
• The by popular demand: Fem! Astarion x Winnie fic for pride.
• Hunted Part 2
Any questions?
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thechaoticdruid · 3 days
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I'm in the mood to answer some questions. So if you want to ask anything about my stories, my OCS or stuff about me go ahead and hit up my inbox! But if it's about when chapters or stories are coming out I can't give a definite answer.
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thechaoticdruid · 4 days
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Height comparison chart based on the in-game models
Dragonborn Durge is 6'8" or 204cm. Halsin and Minsc are 6'7" or 200cm. Karlach is 6'4" or 192cm. Devil form Wyll is 6'1" or 185cm (the horns net him ~2 in / ~5cm!) Human form Wyll, Astarion, and Gale are 5'11" or 180 cm. Jaheira, Shadowheart, Minthara, and Lae'zel are 5'7" or 170cm.
The models are a little bigger in Blender than they would be in the real world. Devil Wyll was 6'7" going by his model in blender, which is just...Not Correct.
This could be because my extracts scaled slightly wrong when i imported them into blender, or the in-game scale is slightly larger than the real world, or they're just modeled a little taller than they're meant to be to make them look biggg. (my vote is that i fucked the scale. rip y'all's estimation of my intelligence.)
Whatever the reason, I knew that they were all scaled wrong in the same way. This means that instead of giving up a futile pursuit, I could do math to figure out something more reasonable.
We happen to know that Astarion is "approximately 5'11"."
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I used that as a baseline. So, with our scale established, we get something like this:
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Other notes:
Shadowheart/Jahiera/Minthara, Minsc/Halsin, and Gale/Astarion/Wyll share the same heights because they use the same body model.
I'm decently certain that githyanki share an armature with elves/half-elves/drow/humans, so even though the gith body model looks different, Lae'zel is the same height as the other gals to line up with their armature's bones.
I didn't include hair or head accessories (like Shadowheart's) in the total height (that's cheating).
I did include Durge's and Karlach's horns in their overall height, but Karlach's really don't add much (maybe a cm or 2).
Average height worldwide (on Earth) for men is 5'9"/ 175 cm, and for women is 5'4" / 161 cm, so they're all quite tall, but mostly still within a standard deviation of the average.
Except for Karlach, Halsin, and Minsc, who are in the 99.9th percentile for height! They're not tall, they're huge.
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thechaoticdruid · 4 days
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I just love my Gnome Durge okay.
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thechaoticdruid · 4 days
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Haven't done any BG3 sims stuff for a while because an update messed up my mods and I'm just now getting around to fixing it.
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So here's Winnie and Astarion pillow fighting.
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thechaoticdruid · 4 days
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I know the feeling all too well 😔
Head empty, can't write
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thechaoticdruid · 4 days
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I get pretty tired of people arguing over which is the REAL Astarion. Both Ascended Astarion and Spawn Astarion are really Astarion. How is this so hard to understand?
Ascended Astarion is Astarion who has completely tossed the idea of being a good person and is embracing every selfish impulse he has. He has no filter and refuses to be ashamed of his wicked side.
Where as Spawn Astarion is Astarion who's trying to be better. He's still Astarion so he has some hiccups on the road and approves of doing some shitty things but the point is he's trying. Not pretending.
Both Ascended Astarion and Spawn Astarion do recognize they have changed one way or the other.
"I appreciate the thought but I'm not the same person I was before." -Ascended Astarion if you meet Araj in act 3 post Ascension and attempt to defend him from her.
"People change even if they never dreamed they could." -Spawn Astarion talking about himself if you cheat on him with Mizora and suggest he'd do the same. (It's datamined and not yet added into the game but will be eventually.)
The point is they both have changed but they are still Astarion. Hell, Pre personal quest Astarion is just a mixture of them.
There is no REAL Astarion, there is just Astarion set on a Good path or an evil path.
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thechaoticdruid · 5 days
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I was wondering when we may see another chapter of "This Bites?" It has been a while, and I'm dying to read more! I love your story!! I want to see Astarion and Winnie finally get together ❤️
Working on a special chapter right now but it's been a bit difficult with my ADHD distracting me all the time. That and honestly writer's block tends to pop in every once and a while. I'm not exactly sure when it will be out but I am still working on it.👌
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thechaoticdruid · 5 days
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Ah yes more Ascended Astarion Vs Spawn Astarion discourse I see. Honestly at this point both Spawn and Ascended fans give me a headache whenever I see them screaming at each other.
I have thought about doing a little post about both endings but I really don't think I want to open the flood gates for that shit storm on my blog.
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