incorrect-bhaalspawn-quotes
Humorous Quotes Erroneously Attributed to Baldur's Gate
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“Oh, I’ve been dead inside for years, I’m just waiting for the outside to catch up.”
-Xan, probably
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Charname: How about you? What have you got?
Alora: I can smile!
Charname: Never mind. What about you?
Xan: I know how everybody’s going to die.
#source: bob's burgers#incorrect bhaalspawn quotes#baldur's gate#baldur's gate 1#bg1#alora#xan of evereska
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“I’ve always found the idea of death comforting. The thought that my life could end at any moment frees me to fully appreciate the beauty and art and horror of everything this world has to offer.”
-Haer’dalis, probably
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Coran: It’s going to be an awesome night!
Safana: We’re not going to have a three way.
Coran: It’s going to be a pretty good night…
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"Ah, Godchild. What an unexpected surprise. And by unexpected, I mean completely expected."
-Irenicus, when Charname comes to confront him at the Tree of Life
#source: phineas and ferb#incorrect bhaalspawn quotes#baldur's gate#baldur's gate 2#bg2#charname#jon irenicus
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Tav: I’m sorry to tell you this, but you do have a heart and the capacity to feel.
Astarion: You take that back!
#source: twitter#incorrect bhaalspawn quotes#baldur's gate#baldur's gate 3#bg3#bg3 tav#bg3 astarion#astarion#astarion ancunin
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“Cross my heart and hope to die. I really mean that last part.”
-Xan, making a promise
#source: in plain sight#baldur's gate#incorrect bhaalspawn quotes#bg1#baldur’s gate 1#xan of evereska
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Garrick: I wrote a song about the moment I found out Eldoth had tragically died.
Garrick: It’s called “Wearing Yellow To A Funeral.”
#source: six the musical#baldur's gate#incorrect bhaalspawn quotes#bg1#baldur’s gate 1#garrick#eldoth kron
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Haer'dalis: You know why they call me The Sparrow?
Anomen: Because you made it up. No one calls you that. Your name is Haer'Dalis.
#source: orange is the new black#incorrect bhaalspawn quotes#baldur's gate#baldur's gate 2#bg2#haer'dalis#anomen delryn
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Lae'zel: I am going to kill you with my bare hands.
Shadowheart: I am going to rip your heart out and eat it whole.
Karlach: I love my friends :)
#source: outofcontextdiscord#incorrect bhaalspawn quotes#baldur's gate#baldur's gate 3#bg3#bg3 lae'zel#lae'zel#bg3 shadowheart#shadowheart#bg3 karlach#karlach cliffgate
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Skie: *hands over a bouquet of roses* For you, my darling.
Eldoth: Oh! How ordinary. *throws them in the trash*
#source: blazing saddles#baldur's gate#incorrect bhaalspawn quotes#bg1#baldur’s gate 1#skie silvershield#eldoth kron
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“The gods didn’t get to be gods by giving away money.”
-Kagain, probably
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Tav: Why do you smell like smoke?
Karlach: Got set on fire twice!
Tav: I thought you were fireproof.
Karlach: Nope! Just stubborn.
Tav: ...Are you okay...?
#incorrect bhaalspawn quotes#baldur's gate#baldur's gate 3#bg3#bg3 tav#bg3 karlach#karlach cliffgate#source: overly sarcastic productions
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“Guilty people bleed more than innocent people.”
-Ajantis, wiping the blood off his sword after killing a bunch of bandits.
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Charname, after getting their soul stolen: A little bit of me has died, but you know what? A lot of me doesn't give a shit.
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Safana: I like heroes, but I don't want to be one.
Safana: Do you even know what heroes are? Let me explain. Say you have some meat. Pirates will feast on the meat but a hero would distribute that meat among the people.
Safana: I want to eat that meat!
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Faldorn, sending more wild animals to attack Trademeet: Don't underestimate the limitless destructive power of the giraffe!
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