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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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Journey Into Mystery #631
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During Fear Itself, not only was Journey Into Mystery directly tied to the main events but it also had some of the best writing and art out of anything I read.  Natrually, when Fear Itself ended, I decided to continue getting the book especially since the things they've done with Loki recently is really cool. [Spoilers]
The book starts by explaining the same things explained in the recent Fear Itself 7.2; Odin has left to the Asgardian realm with his brother's body, leaving the 3 All-mothers in charge.  They brought in Tanarus to replace Thor as god of thunder and in doing so, also made everyone forget that Thor ever existed.  Well, everyone except for Loki and this is yet another reason this comic is going to remain so good.  
The rest of the issue deals mostly with the aftermath of Loki's actions during Fear Itself.  The All-mothers know that most of what Loki did and ask him to name his acomplice in using the Destroyer armor but Loki refuses to give him up.  Hela is returned to her own realm rather than being a part of Mephisto's and she leaves her daughter Leah with Loki who hides her in a cave.  Finally the All-Mother (as they're known collectively) tell Loki that they will use him secretly as a weapon to foster change amongst the Asgardians.  The last page serves as a teaser as to a coming villain.
So that's Journey Into Mystery.  It's short and sweet and has very little to make fun of but that isn't a bad thing.  Aside from Uncanny X-Force it's one of the best comics Marvel has to offer, especially if you hold any interest in the Asgardians who aren't named Thor or simply want to see more of Loki as he is now (he's a child for those who don't know).  4.5 Destroyer armors out of 5.  Join us next week when Anthony Hopkins forgets to take his medication and thinks he's Odin.
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-The Hound
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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New Avengers #18
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New Avengers #17 left me wondering who they would choose this time around for Norman Osborn's Dark Avengers.  I mean, they did such an awesome job before with Mac Gargan/Venom as Spider-Man and Daken as Wolverine.  Everyone seemed to fit really well and I found it funny that Osborn would try to take on the roles of both Captain America AND Iron Man.  The great thing about this comic is that it's all build up to who these new Dark Avengers will be and in a couple places (especially the last page) it mirrors the first issue of Dark Avengers from last time around.  If you care to be surprised about who is who then read no further because honestly there is little else to talk about for this book. [Spoilers]
The first thing to note as that this issue jumps back and forth between Osborn partnering up with Hydra, the Hand, and A.I.M. and him picking out each of his team members.  The first one we see is Skaar who happens to be the Hulk's son.  I'm a little surprised at this one for a couple reasons.  First, Skaar has never come off as a bad guy in any way and second, he seemed pretty content in the Savage Land when last we saw him.  Whatever the reason for him joining, it's still a great choice, reminding me of Wolverine's own son taking his role.  
The next one they show is Clint Barton's brother who apparantly survived Avengers Tower coming down on him in Fear Itself.  There's no doubt he's going to be the team's Hawkeye although I'm not sure yet if I like this one better than Bullseye from last time.  I mean, do all the Dark Avengers have to be related to their counterparts?  Well, luckily they didn't go that route with all of them.
The third one is my favorite.  Funny enough it's the character taking the role of Spider-Man which was my favorite one from the old Dark Avengers as well.  I guess I just love Spider-Man and just about any alternate version they can think of.  This time around it's Ai Apeac who was previously in the Special Containment Center wiht Norman Osborn during the Osborn limited series.  This causes a little bit of a continuity snafoo on Marvel's part because here we see him in the jungle before joining Osborn where he's supposed to have been the whole time even though he was in one of the Spider Island tie-ins.  Oh well.  It's a small thing really compared to some of the things they overlook.  Anyway he looks so utterly bad ass that I won't even bother to describe it.  Instead I'll just leave this picture.
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We also see Osborn speaking with the Gorgon who is to choose who he will be on the team as well as Doctor Covington who I believe ends up being the Scarlet Witch.  Now we get to the one thing that I'm really confused on.  If you haven't read Fear Itself 7.2 yet and don't want it to be spoiled, be warned because this has everything to do with the problem here.  In said Fear Itself comic, they show that Tanarus (who is to be the new god of thunder since Thor is dead) not only takes the place of Thor but the memories of mortals have been altered to think that he was always the god of thunder.  Well this is all well and good and I actually think it's a great idea except for the next scene in this issue.  We see that A.I.M. still has Ragnarok, the clone of Thor.  This is also very cool but if everyone's memory has been altered after Fear Itself then how is it that Norman Osborn or anyone at A.I.M. would even know who Thor is?  Ah well, either they'll explain eventually or they won't.  That's Marvel.  
On the final page we see the team assembled in costume where we also have a Wolverine (I'm guessing it's Gorgon)  and a semi Ms. Marvel looking woman (who I'm guessing is the woman from A.I.M.).  In the last line, Norman even makes a crack about finding himself a decent suit or armor.
This whole arc is shaping up to be something that I think will be a lot of fun to read.  If I have one complaint it's that Marvel decided to stick a preview to the damn Castle graphic novel in the back that they had been using two months back.  What? They just needed filler and pulled this out of nowhere?  The book came out back in September!  Not only that, ALL my other comics this week have previews to X-Sanction.  I would almost like to blame a printing error here.  Anyway it doesn't ruin the comic in the slightest (as dumb as it is).  4 Spider-Man limbs out of 5.  Join us next week when Norman reveals...too much of himself.
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-The Hound
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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X-Men #20
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Schism left each X-Men title with a choice of joining either Wolverine or Cyclops.  X-Men (no adjective needed) chose Cyclops and not only that but it changed focus as well.  Prior to issue 20 X-Men had been a little more cartoony and focused primarily on their interactions with other Marvel heroes such as Spider-Man.  Now it's about the team in charge of security of Utopia.  The cast has switched to be mainly Psylocke, Jubilee, Warpath, Colossus, and Domino.  This first arc also features Storm prominantly.  I found this a welcome change as I was actually pretty close to dropping the title after the last arc. [Spoilers]
We start off with Domino in the Chechen Republic, taking pictures of a couple of Sentinals.  She runs into trouble and that's when Cyclops decides to send in Storm and the others to investigate.  On the way, they run into War Machine who tells them they need to turn around.  Storm lies and says they will and then, of course, they keep on going where they're not supposed to be.  It's little things like this that reminds us that the X-Men aren't like other teams.  The Avengers would simply be allowed to enter the area or at the very least have a chance to explain themselves but not the X-Men.  Every now and then we get a glimpse that the other super heroes might not consider them of the same group as Captain America or Iron Man.  
After landing their plane, the X-Men run into War Machine (or Iron Man 2.0 or whatever he's calling himself now) again and tells them to leave again.  They try to explain themselves and Colossus puts a hand on War Machine's shoulder only to be punched in the face in return.  This seems a bit harsh to me.  I don't know.  I just find it a little hard to believe that War Machine was that tense that day and would just deck someone at the drop of a hat.  It's like he's just asking for Colossus to go all Juggernaut on him.  They continue to fight as we see a page of Domino down for the count with a Sentinal looming over her.
So that's X-Men #20.  It's pretty short but it makes me hopeful for the future of the series since the story and art were both much better than they had been.  4.5 why is Jubilee in this comic?'s out of 5.  (Important Note about what I've seen while searching for pictures for this post: Just because you CAN draw Storm as a man naked does not mean that you SHOULD draw Storm as a man Naked.) Join us next week when Storm forgets that the 80's are over.
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-The Hound
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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Uncanny X-Men #1
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Having been pleased by Wolverine and the X-Men and the changes it brought, of course I was also looking forward to the relaunch of Uncanny X-Men.  I admit I was a little less excited over this one as it didn't seem that it was going to be much different than the previous Uncanny X-Men title other than it would be missing the characters that went with Wolverine.  Well if I knew what was in store, I would have been a lot more excited. [Spoilers]
Art is not the most important thing to me in a comic.  I judge things a lot more by story than art but of course, it's hard not to admire when it's done very well.  Uncanny X-Men is one of those books.  The cover is pretty good (especially when compared to Wolverine and the X-Men's cover) and when you open it up it...oh my god Mr. Sinister just killed that woman!  Anyway as I was saying Carlos Pacheco is pretty good  and he makes everyone look human at le...oh god he stabbed that guy too!  When did Mr. Sinister get so bad ass?  He looks bad ass, he acts bad ass, and he's 90% less stupid looking than he was in the 90's.  
Meenwhile, Cyclops is having his first meeting with his new Extinction team which includes Magneto, Emma Frost, Colossus, Magik, Namor, Hope Summers, Storm, and Danger.  Basically his plan is to make them an Avengers-like team, saving the world enough times to finally get the world's respect for mutants.  So, basically what the X-Men do already except now they're seeking trouble out?  Alright Scott, we'll see how this goes.  We get a montage showing that nothing's going on until finally they are contacted by the Peak (orbital base of S.W.O.R.D.).  They're informed that something strange is going on at the Dreaming Celestial which happens to be in San Fransisco.  
They go to investigate and find that it's head is leaving the body and transforming into Sinister's face.  After having Emma link him telepathically to Sinister, Scott is told that Sinister is giving him just what he wanted and apparently he knows about the Extinction team already.  
Emma calls Namor in who beats that head down.  Immediately, the body starts spewing bots all over the place to attack the X-Men.  Colossus is blown back by one and Emma Frost, while in diamond form, loses an arm.  Hope mimcs her telepathic ability to keep Scott in touch with everyone else.  Storm and Magneto take down the celestial's body and Colossus transforms into the Juggernaut.  His sister teleports him over the body and he breaks it down even further while the X-Club work out what is happening to it.  Magneto pieces it back together but is unable to do so for long.  But, before we get to see his brains leak from his eye sockets as he put it, the book ends with a scene of Sinister landing the head and recreating everything around it to be a city of Sinisters.  That's right Wolverine, you deal with that punk kid from the Hellfire Club.  Scott has to deal with a bunch of Mr. Sinisters!
This was a fantastic first issue.  It did set up the premise but it didn't spend the whole issue doing it like Wolverine and the X-Men did.  I like both these comics a lot thus far but at the moment this is my favorite of the two.  5 optic blasts out of 5.  Join us next week when the leader of the X-Men will be an actual Cyclops.
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-The Hound
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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Spider Island
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Because Fear Itself and Schism weren't enough for events this summer, we also get Spider Island.  Thankfully this is another case of the tie-ins not really being imporant.  The one exception to this is Venom which thankfully, I read already.  If you read Venom and Amazing Spider-Man you'll get main story (although the tie-ins I did read were quite humerous). [Spoilers] 
I like that it opens with Spider-Man kicking Hydro Man's ass.  I always hated that villain.  He's like a second rate Sandman.  They then go over Peter's life as of late.  He has a good job at Horizon Labs (since the Big Time story arc), has a new girlfriend who is also a crime scene investigator (smart idea Peter, you're really going to keep your secret identity with that one), and his Aunt May and her husband (father of J. Jonah Jameson) are on their way out of town, moving to Boston after years of terrible things happening New York.  They reveal that they just had the apartment sprayed for bed bugs which happens to end up being the cause of this event.  The Jackal is back and has altered these bugs to give anyone bitten spider powers.  Why has he done this?  So that I can spend money on an event of course!  The Jackal is an evil guy.  Then they go over that Spidey is a member of the Future Foundation (the current version of the Fantastic Four) and then quickly cut to the new Venom AKA Flash Thompson.  They remind us that Spider-Man has been training with Shang Chi ever since he lost his Spider-Sense.  Peter goes home where his girlfriend, Carlie, tries to tell him she has spider powers but he brushes her off and goes to bed.  The Prologue ends (yes this is still just the prologue) with the Jackal along with a very mutated Kaine creating another mutant spider from an unknown subject and to cover up who he is from the reader, they call him the Spider King.  We also get a glimpse of the person behind the Jackal's plan though her identity is also kept a secret.
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Part 1 opens up with a kind of fake out, implying that Carlie has discovered Peter's secret as the picture shows Peter standing above her on the ceiling.  One page turn later reveals that it's just the opposite and it's actually Carlie on the ceiling.  Hahaha...I see what you did there comic.  Dan Slott really is great and bringing a good amount of humor to Spider-Man.  Peter seems to think that Carlie's spider powers are some sort of STD that he's given her.  We then see the Jackal gathering criminals who have gotten spider powers as he hands them each various Spider-Man costumes.  Chaos insues as the "Spider-Men" start pillaging Manhatten with Mary Jane caught right in the middle.  Again the humor is very well done with her making the comment, "I swear if we're doing the clone-thing again, I'm going back to L.A.".  Take that clone saga that went on way too long!  It isn't long before a mix mash of superheroes show up including some of the Avengers, Spider-Girl, and Cloak and Dagger.  Peter and Carlie are stuck in a cab in traffic and upon hearing about the disturbance on the radio, Carlie web swings out of the cab, leaving Peter alone.  When the real Spidey finally does show up to the fight, the other heroes start beating the crap out of him thinking he's one of the criminals.  
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Part 2 starts with the heroes realizing their mistake and telling Spider-Man to get lost so they don't repeat the mistake.  So Peter changes back to his civillian identity and Norah Winters catches him to have him take some pictures of the fighting for her even though he doesn't work for the Daily Bugle anymore.  Mary Jane sees them and insists that Peter should be out there helping even using his girlfriend as an example when he tries to give the "I'm just a normal guy" excuse.  So, Peter takes the camera and records himself using his powers to inspire normal people to come out and help fight the criminals.  I actually find the next part really cool with regular old Peter Parker leading civillians into the fight.  For once he can just use his powers in public.  No sooner do they win the fight than J. Jonah Jameson (Mayor of New York) quarantines the island.  So Pete heads back to Horizon Labs to help Reed Richards work on a cure.  Little do they realize there already is a cure in the form of Eddie Brock who is now Anti-Venom.  Peter is sent to the police station to retool the villain equipment stored there for Jameson's Spider-Patrol.  Carlie meets up with him there and tells him she has a lead on the Jackal so they both head to his old lab at Empire State University.
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In the lab, they're attacked by the lamest villains possible.  Seriously, I don't know who any of these guys are and already I'm sick of them.  We get the bunny girl who won't wear pants.  We get "I wish I was Mysterio but something went horribly wrong".  Finally we get generic super villain from City of Heroes who has no memorable features or abilities.  They are defeated easily, making them seem even more pointless.  Meenwhile, Venom is fighting the Spider King and in his own comic we discover that the Spider King is actually Steve Rogers.  Reed Richards creates a vaccine that works provided you aren't already infected and we learn that J. Jonah Jameson is indeed infected.  Hahaha...ironic.  I see what you did there.  Madame Web who had been the one to tell Shang Chi to train Spider-Man, is suddenly overwhelmed because of all the feedback from the web of life.  Yes, if you have spider powers you are part of the "web of life".  She collapses, unable to see the future anymore.  Spider-Man faces off with the Shocker who now has six arms and is transforming into a full spider and finally the big villain behind it all is revealed to be the Spider Queen.  If you don't know who that is, don't worry.  I didn't either which means at some point I completely missed her.  She first appeared in 2004 and apparently has been around since World War II in the continuity and even knows Captain America from back then (which is why she chose him to be the Spider King).  
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In Part 4 everyone who was infected has become a giant spider.  Anti-Venom is in a church, offering to cure anyone who has been infected.  The uninfected heroes are putting up devices designed to jam spider sense ( the same device that's responsible for Spidey losing his own spider sense).  We get a great scene of Spider-Man and Jameson fighting side by side.  Hahaha...okay that's enough you're killing me Slott.  The Spider Queen is telepathically controlling all the giant spiders and uses this power to accelerate Jameson's transformation while he's talking to Alistaire Smythe (who is responsible for killing Jameson's wife very recently).  The transformed mayor bites and apparently kills Smythe.  Wow, there goes a villain that's been around for long time in the blink of an eye.  Venom is sent after Anti-Venom so that he can be used for the cure and rather than ask for his help the symbiote, who hates Eddie Brock now, causes him to fight him head on and bring him back bound.  And finally, Mary Jane gets spider powers after complaining about not having them the entire event up till now.
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Next issue we find that Smythe may not be dead yet but we don't really get to see whether he survives or not during this event.  I would hope that woudn't be the end of a classic Spider-Man villain.  Hell they already killed off the original Hobgoblin in such a quick way recently but I do like that Dan Slott is not afraid of changing things up in Spider-Man's world.  The Spider Queen is pissed off to learn that Horizon Labs has Anit-Venom and have developed a cure from him so the Jackal sends Kaine to deal with it.  They inform Brock that if they create enough to cure the city he can't be Anti-Venom again, a sacrifice that Eddie Brock is more than willing to make just so he can be the hero.  We also learn that "Number Six" at Horizon Labs is actually Michael Morbius which I can't wait for them to go back to later.  The spiders begin a full assault on Horizon with the heroes taking shifts to keep them back and Madame Web appears to ask Reed Richards to take down the spider sense jamming towers.  Spider-Man gets back into his lab to find Kaine waiting to ambush him.  He goes to contaminate the cure but Spidey stops him just time.  He also gets his spider sense back thanks to his co workers at Horizon just in time to be bad ass and throw Kaine into the cure, restoring him to a more human state but still with his spider powers (and thus we have our new Scarlet Spider).  We end off the issue with the Spider Queen appearing to kill the Jackal and now thanks to the jamming towers being taken out she is gaining even more power from all the spiders.
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Steve Rogers and Venom take the Spider Queen out (which you get to see more of if you read Venom before reading Part 6) but unfortunately she transforms into a huge spidery version of herself.  Spider-Man and Kaine quickly change costumes before the other guys from Horizon enter the room so that they find Spider-Man standing next to Peter in his boxers.  Once they're alone again, Peter gets his costume back and lends Kaine the stealth suit he designed during Big Time.  The two swing in to fight the Spider Queen for the final time and Mary Jane pops up out of nowhere to help out.  They run off back to the police pricinct (leaving Kaine behind along with all the other heroes fighting the queen) and retrieve Doc Ock's octobots.  Once atop the Empire State Building, Spider-Man uses the octobots to distribute the Anti-Venom cure to everyone in New York.  Without her minions to fuel her, the queen starts to weaken and Kaine finally finishes her off since he can "cross the line that Peter Parker can't" as Madame Web puts it.  This is just another thing that makes me excited for the Scarlet Spider ongoing.  With the Spider Queen dead, Spidey sit atop the Empire State Building together as the story comes to an end.
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We can't forget the epilogue though.  This issue is simply amazing.  Madame Web talks to Kaine about his future, setting us up for the Scarlet Spider series.  We find out that the Jackal is indeed alive and that it was one of his clones that was killed.  He takes a sample of the queen's body (so she can come back later of course).  Eddie Brock is declared the real hero of the day taking the credit from Spider-Man.  Then we get the biggest news from the end of this event; Carlie is leaving Peter.  She figured out that he's Spider-Man and that he lied to her and leaves with her things.  In a rage, Peter goes to Dr. Strange to find out why the spell protecting his identity failed.  We learn that because Peter used his powers in public without his mask the spell was broken forever and now people can figure out who he is again.  This is the best thing to come out of all this as it was kind of annoying to have a magical way to keep his identity secret so that he could be stupid about it.  Madame Web comes to him and tells him he can use the last cure on himself and quit being Spider-Man.  When he says that he'll never quit she hints that he'll lose someone close to him in the future as a result.  He takes the last cure to Mary Jane and forces her to use it.  The epilogue comes to a close with New York saying thanks to Spidey by lighting up the Empire State Building with his classic red and blue colors.  This whole ending was by far the best part of the whole event for me and left me anxiously waiting for more Spider-Man.  
All in all this was a really fun story.  It wasn't as amazing as some Spider-Man stories but as always with Dan Slott, the writing was top notch.  4.5 Jameson Mustaches out of 5.  Join us next week when the Jackal clones Captain Picard
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-The Hound
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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Incredible Hulk #1
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With the end of the series being called the Increbible Hulks (plural), Marvel decided to go back to #1 and return to just the single Hulk.  I felt this would be a good point to jump onto the series and it turned out to be true since this story shoots right out of the end of Fear Itself.  [Spoilers]
We jump right in to find the Hulk has been living underground with Mole people, fighting monsters and that he's grown a beard.  That's already a bit to take in but bearded Hulk is pretty awesome.  He finally feels free of Banner and has gone below so that nobody from the surface world can bother him.  This seems like a fitting end to the Hulk as a character but instead the surface world finds him anyway.  
Someone named Amanda Von Doom (they claim she's not related to Dr. Doom but that seems like a pretty dumb coincidence) claims to be working for the government after initially attacking the Hulk.  She tells him they need his help and that the problem is Dr. Banner.  Hmm, this seems interesting already.  
Thankfully the comic then cuts to see what Bruce Banner's been up to and...oh my god he's gone bat shit insane.  He's been created "hulks" out of the local wildlife wherever it is that he's gone to in an attempt to recreate the Hulk himself for some reason.  My personal assumption is that he went a little nuts trying to figure out how he and Hulk were seperated.  
Surprisingly we've already reached the end of the comic and there is my one complaint.  It feels too damn short.  The art is amazing, the story kept me glued and longing to find out what happens next but it almost just feels like a preview chapter.  This is definately one of those $4 Marvel books that I feel should have been 3.  There's just not a lot of substance or meat to it.  It doesn't leave much for me to make fun of either.  Okay I guess I could go on and on about the two mutant boars that Banner created as they talk like they learned just enough grammar to be annoying.  Seriously if they're smart enough to talk, why couldn't Banner bother to teach them the basics of the english language?  I would say I hope we don't see too much more of these two but that's wishful thinking.
So there it is.  Good comic but Jason Aaron is obviously too busy with Wolverine and Wolverine and the X-Men (2 different titles, I did not make a mistake there) to make this book feel like a full comic.  Still looking forward to more but it has to lose points for that.  3.5 dumb ass boars our of 5.
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-The Hound
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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Wolverine and the X-Men #1
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When I first heard about about Wolverine and the X-Men, I thought "what a terrible title.  They only picked that because they'll sell more books having Wolverine's name on it."  Well, I still think that but that doesn't stop me from enjoying the book.  Just like the cartoon, you have to look past that title and enjoy the story itself.  
The cover is quite terrible.  The main reason i say this is I hate the way Chris Bachalo draws Wolverine like he's some kind of troll.  Other than that, the layout on these Regenesis comics is pretty good but that hardly makes up for Wolverine looking like he has a square head.  That's all I'm going to complain about on that because what makes a comic worth reading is certainly what's inside the damn thing.[Spoilers]
Appropriately, the story starts with Logan showing Professor Xavier around the rebuilt school (I'm not going to ask how they did that so fast since last week it was rubble).  Wait a minute.  Professor X is in an X-Men comic!  Rejoice!  
It jumps forward at this point to the first day of school where Logan and Kitty Pryde have to show the school to the New York State Department of Education.  They're a bit over the top snooty about it and don't care for the classes they look in on.  We find that Toad is the school's janitor which is hilarious.  They show that a brood is going to the school which some of the students don't like.  The whole comic just has a lot going on and feels like it's just introducing ideas for future issues, which is hardly a bad thing.  One thing I find particuarly funny is that now the entire school is a danger room with hazards popping up anywhere at anytime such as the restrooms.  
We get a really awkward moment where idie tells  the visitors that they're all monsters there.  Then we see Quentin Quire being kept out of sight for the day.  Oh Quentin Quire.  Hopefully I grow to like this character since it seems he's sticking around but I just don't get it right now.  
Then, they take a look at Beast's lab.  Probably one the most exciting things about this series for me was the return of Beast to the X-Men.  I haven't really followed Secret Avengers very closely and for the last couple years it's been one of the only places to really see him.  He runs off in a hurry to meet up with Warbird and the son of Gladiator of the Shi'ar.  Okay why does Gladiator's son look so lame?  He looks like if they rebooted the character of Gladiator but tried to make him some punk teenager.  I would excuse it if he were even from Earth but he just seems over the top.  That seems to be a running theme with this book from the start.  The art, the way people act, it's all just a little bit too out of proportion.  
We end this first issue off with Kade Kilgore, the Black King of the Hellfire Club, coming face to face with Wolverine and informing he will destroy everything they've built.  Immediately after this an earthquake seems to go off leaving the grounds all kinds of messed up.  I have to say I found this ending a tad confusing as I wasn't sure if the Kade Kilgore had caused it or if it was one of the random problems that Beast mentioned during his brief scene.  I'm assuming they'll explain it more next issue but for now we leave off with Wolverine flying through the air as the ground is rising up.  
Overall, I think it makes for a rather good first issue, introducing all the characters we'll be seeing most of time and really just getting back into that feel of X-Men being about students at a school.  I like that we have this being what it is and  Uncanny being the more adult non student oriented side.  4 Snikts! our of 5.
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-The Hound
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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New Avengers #16.1 and #17
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Marvel .1 was a good idea that, for the most part, Marvel has misused and utterly failed on so far.  Most of the time, rather than being a good jumping on point for new readers (which was supposed to be the whole purpose.) they often put them in the middle of an arc already in progress and in some cases are utterly pointless (Pun not intended but I'll gladly take credit for it).  Lately, it seems they might finally be getting the idea.  The New Avengers 16.1 occurs after the events of Fear Itself and does actually set the stage for the foreseeable future in the series. [Spoilers]  It all centers around Norman Osborn escaping from the New Avengers during an attempt to transfer him from prison to trial.  There's really not much more to say as it's actually pretty enjoyable and if you like Norman Osborn, it's a must read.  
I would like to take this time to talk about his hair, however.  In the 1960's everybody in comics looked a little wierd.  By comparison, Norman and Harry Osborn's hair didn't look all that strange.  Over the years, most of the marvel universe has been updated to fit the time it's written in but for some reason they just can't seem to fix that hair.  Now it just looks bizarre.  It's got those ridges like he just pulled his head off a barbecue grill.  I find it even stranger that Harry kept the same look too.  You'd think he'd want to look as little like his dad as possible.  It must be some permanent part of their genetic make up.  Hell, maybe they're mutants and that's their only physical mutation.  
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The New Avengers 17 is the first issue to feature Daredevil in the cover (as a full member not just a guest character as in Fear Itself).  I do find it a little odd that Spider-Man and the Thing are in Their FF uniforms when usually they don't where those while on other teams.  
The comic opens with the New Avengers coming to back up Iron Man in a fight against Ultimo.  He keeps telling them not to just hit it but they repeatedly do not listen.  It almost feels like an MMO where one guy is trying to explain how to defeat a boss but the entire group just runs in and attacks before he can finish.  Finally it blows everone back and Iron Man explains that it absorbs kinetic energy.  Doctor Strange uses a spell to bind Ultimo (being the bad ass that he is) and Wolverine basically tears it to pieces.  While doing so, another robot sneaks up behind Wolverine.  Again, Iron Man tries to warn him and again, he doesn't listen.  Apparantly the Marvel Universe still hasn't figured out that Tony Stark is pretty damn smart.  The robot grabs Wolverine and takes a sample of his blood.  The thing that I find hilarious is that the blood sample actually rockets away on its own.  It's a jar of Wolverine's blood with rockets on the bottom.  The tiny rockets are so powerful that Ms. Marvel can't catch it as it gets away.  Wolverine gets pissed and continues slashing at the already disabled Ultimo.  
The comic then cuts to show all of this from Norman Osborn's point of view.  It turns out the plan was to get Tony Stark's armor but when the New Avengers show up, Norman decides to improvise and go for Wolverine instead.  Then, we get a cliffhanger as they detonate Ultimo and we don't see what state the heroes are in after the explosion.
I'm really intersted to see where they're going with this.  Norman Osborn always makes for such a fun bad guy and the storytelling in New Avengers has been really good.  5 pumpkin bombs out of 5.
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-The Hound
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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Penguin: Pain and Prejudice #1
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Writer: Gregg Hurwitz
Art and Cover: Szymon Kudranski
"Before logic- before reason- there are so many lessons we learn. Comfort...and fear. But one thing, at least, was clear to me from  a tender age...it's a cold, cold world."
I'm a pretty big fan of Batman; I think it's safe to say he's my favorite hero. Part of what makes Batman so great is the villains. Of course we have the Joker, Catwoman, Poison Ivy, Two Face, the Scarecrow, and a whole slew of other awesome villains. One villain I've never given much thought to is the Penguin. Maybe it's because he's a tad ridiculous, what with the umbrella and "wah wah wah" laugh, that I've never thought of him as the best Batman villain. However, after reading the first issue of Penguin: Pain and Prejudice, my opinion of  Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot has greatly changed. The cover of the comic sets the tone for the rest of the comic. All that graces the cover is the Penguin's hook-nosed mug. What really establishes the tone is the coloring. Much like the cover, the entire comic is shady, dark, cold, and even a bit hazy (it's almost kind of dream-like, especially in the flashbacks). The comic opens with the birth of Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot (and no, he didn't hatch from an egg) with the Penguin's narration overlaying the scene. We see that he was born ugly. Despite this, his mother still accepts and loves him (to some degree). His father, however, does not. These opening pages set the tone for the lonely life that the Penguin must have led.
We then cut to the Penguin at a party he's hosting. While the party is going on, he explains how he uses fear and intimidation to get what he wants. He has almost a Machiavellian view on life; that it is better to be feared than it is to be loved. Everyone seems to be sucking up to the Penguin and on their best behavior, lest they incur his wrath. As the Penguin makes his way to leave the party, he bumps into one party-goer that gets angry and proceeds to start calling him a "fat ass," that is until he realizes just who it is that bumped into him. He then apologizes profusely and throws himself at the Penguin's mercy. The Penguin looks him over for a moment and just laughs it off, telling him not to worry about it. The final scene of the party shows the Penguin telling his associates to retrieve a necklace that he wants. Cut to his associates stealing a huge gemstone necklace from an elderly woman and murdering her to do so. "...at the end of the day, what Oswald wants, Oswald gets."
Post theft and murder, we get a flashback of the Penguin's childhood. We see how his own siblings rejected him and how his classmates mercilessly teased and ridiculed him. His only companions were birds; he learned what he could from them. The bird that Oswald most admired as a child was the penguin.
          Penguins can't fly. They are awkward on land. Slow moving. Uncoordinated. So they adapt. They make do with what they have. Play to their strengths. Of all birds, they         swim the fastest. Dive the deepest. Their two-tone plumage camouflages them from         above and below. Many find true love and mate for life. They are never lonely. When         they are provoked to fight,  their attacks are swift and decisive...and I vowed that someday, so too would be mine.
This narrative gives so much insight into what makes the Penguin the way he is. His logic is flawless and his reasons understandable. After the flashback, we cut to the Penguin making his way through his hideout. His associates bring him the necklace, called "The Dragon Egg Ruby." He grabs the necklace, doubles his associates' compensation and keeps going about his merry way. He passes his family's tomb and we see the grave markers of his three brothers and his father. The Penguin makes his way to his destination and unveils his purpose for stealing the necklace. The necklace was a gift for his elderly mother. While the Penguin visits his mother, we see him lovingly care for her; after all, she really was the only person that ever showed him any sort of love or kindness. Like the previous flashback, this scene tugged at my heartstrings and made me feel compassion for the Penguin. He's very human despite his cold front (hurr hurr hurr, I mean "wah wah wah").
Well if the previous scene made me feel compassion for old Ozzy, this next part made me go "wow, what a jack ass." We see the Penguin sitting in his office as the man who insulted him previously at the party is brought before him. The man is worried that the Penguin is angry with him but Oswald assures him that he isn't. This meeting is just to let him know what's going on right now in his world. The Penguin informs his guest that his boss has found some money that he's embezzled from the company that he's working for, he left some soup on the stove at his apartment and his apartment along with his beloved neighbor's (with the beloved neighbor still in it) has burnt to a crisp, his mother and father went off a cliff while on their weekend getaway, and that his girlfriend is about to be injected with an infected needle by a deranged psychopath. The Penguin tells his guest that he'd love to chat more but he has business to attend to. So if we've learned anything from this issue, it's this: don't fuck with the Penguin. Seriously! what a cold-hearted, cunning jackass! But I guess I should've expected this from  a villain, especially a Batman villain. The comic closes with the Penguin making arrangements for his New Year's Eve party. As he hammers out the fine details, good old Bats busts onto the scene and asks the Penguin if he can spare a moment to chat. Ho-my-god this comic was absolutely amazing. The story and art were both fantastic and complimented each other wonderfully. I can't even begin to describe how much I liked the cold and dark feeling that the art has; it's just brilliant. I really liked how the narration of the Penguin was presented alongside the story as well. It gave a whole new amount of depth and interest to it. Penguin: Pain and Prejudice is probably one of the best comics I've read so far. I really can't find anything wrong with it (aside from some of  the background characters looking a wee bit derpy). I can't praise it anymore; seriously, check this one out. I'm giving it 5 "wah wah wahs" out of 5.
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-The Kitten
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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9 Things You Need To Know About The Marvel Universe
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1: There is no S.H.I.E.L.D..  During the Dark Reign event, Norman Osborn created a new orginazation called H.A.M.M.E.R. and shut S.H.I.E.L.D. down. Though Osborn was removed from power at the end of the event, S.H.I.E.L.D. remains gone.
2: There are a lot of Hulks.  Aside from the green giant himself, we have Skaar the son of Hulk (first introduced during World War Hulk), the She-Hulk (Hulk's cousin Jennifer Walters), the savage She-Hulk (Hulk's daughter from an alternate future), Red Hulk (General Thunderbolt Ross), and Red She-Hulk (Betty Ross).
3: Iron Man's armor is a part of him.  It's stored in his bones and tied to his central nervous system allowing him to call it forth at will.
4: Asgard is on Earth.  At some point Asgard was destroyed during Ragnarok and rebuilt on Earth near the town of Broxton, Oklahoma.  It is destroyed yet again while Norman Osborn is in charge of H.A.M.M.E.R. but the Asgardians remain there.
5: The Human Torch is dead.  In the final arc of the Fantastic Four early this year, Johnny storm gave his life to safe the Thing and the children of the Future Foundation from the negative zone. Spider-Man is currently filling in for him.
6: Spider-Man is not married to Mary Jane.  After the events of One More Day, their marraige was erased however they were still together for a long time.  Also, almost everyone one who had known who Spider-Man was had it erased from their memory besides Mary Jane.  Since then, Peter has told many of them including the Fantastic Four.  The arc also resulted in Harry Osborn being alive.
7: Flash Thompson is Venom.  Okay so knowing this might not be totally essential but since Venom reviews are sure to pop up from me, it is important.  Flash Thompson lost his legs while in the miliatary and now he's been given the Venom symbiote to use on top secret missions.  He, of course, has legs during them thanks to the symbiote.
8: Wolverine has a son and a clone.  His son being Daken who was previously Dark Wolverine during the Dark Reign event and now has his own ongoing series.  Needless to say they don't get along.  His clone is X-23 and she also has her own ongoing series now.  Wolverine has been helping her to be more human since she was trained only to kill anyone with a certain trigger scent.  
9: Wolverine may or may not have duplicated himself as he seems to be everywhere at once and on multiple teams. (X-Force, X-Men, Avengers, New Avengers)
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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Fear Itself
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Welcome to Fear Itself, Marvel's big money pit for the year of 2011 (and honestly a good portion of 2012 if you plan on reading the Fearless and Battle Scars).  I'm just gonna start by saying honestly if you just want to get the most important bulk of this story, the only things you really need are the main series, Invincible Iron Man, and the Avengers.  Everything else feels completely optional, not that it's all bad.  There are actually quite a few tie-ins that are worth a read if you follow those characters to begin with.  The Uncanny X-Men tie-in is definately one of the better ones and important if you follow them.  But here I'm only really going to talk about the main series itself.[Spoilers Below]
The first of this seven issue series opens with Sin (the very disgusting looking daughter of the Red Skull) finding the hammer of Skadi, one of the worthy under the Serpent God of Fear.  Lost yet?  Okay so the Serpent is the brother of Odin who apparently nobody else in Asgard knows about.  He believes he is the rightful Allfather to the gods and plans to spread fear across the Earth because...why not?  That's what he feeds off of.  Yeah, I've never seen a villain that does that before...(sarcasm).  So, Sin becomes Skadi and releases the Serpent.  Odin decides to pack it in and return from Earth to the Asgardian realm, taking all the other gods with him.  Thor disagrees but of course Odin being the bad ass that he is, smacks Thor down.  The Serpent drops more hammers down for certain characters to find and become Worthy.  Odin and the other Asgardians drag Thor off and abandon Earth, leaving the other super heroes as confused as the reader as to where this is going.  Looking back now that this is all over it doesn't seem so bad but at the time I still wasn't fully sure what Fear Itself was supposed to really be about.
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  The second issue is kind of a jumbled mess.  It spends the entire time setting things up for further issues and also the tie-in books so it doesn't have much focus.  Thor is mad that Odin is abandoning Earth.  Juggernaut picks up a hammer, as do the Hulk, Absorbing Man, Titania, and Attuma.  Sin leads an attack with Nazi mechs against Washington DC.  Again, at this time I was still confused.  There's just so much trying to go on at once and if you read the tie-ins it's even worse.  This event is just all over the place.
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Part 3 is where I feel the event starts to get really good.  Loki goes to break his brother, Thor free.  The Worthy Hulk fights with the Red She-Hulk who is actually his wife, Betty Ross.  The Thing grabs a hammer and joins the Worthy, which becomes a big thing in a lot of the tie-ins.  Odin catches Loki but instead boots Thor back to Earth to die with the mortals.  Apparantly he can't decide whether he cares where his son is or not.  The best part is that Captain America (Bucky Barnes not Steve Rogers at this point) goes toe to toe with Sin/Skadi and is brutally killed.  Finally, I was really enjoying this event and at this point it was rather easy to follow.  
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So in issue 4, Thor is sent back to Earth to protect Sarah Connor.  Okay maybe not.  Meenwhile the Serpent is getting stronger from all the fear he's caused.  Bucky/Captain America is still dead and therefore Steve Rogers agrees to become Captain America once again.  This is something he'd been avoiding for awhile now and I thought it was pretty cool how they got him to do it again.  We get a classic scene of Cap, Thor, and Iron Man heading towards battle together.  Oh it's important to note that Iron Man had been in Paris when all this started and had to deal with the Gray Gargoyle who had also become Worthy (this takes place in the Invincable Iron Man tie-ins).  The Serpent finally gets enough power to pull a Shang Tsung and get younger while raising his "Army of Fear".  I am not kidding there.  He has apparently trademarked the word fear.  Cap parachutes into battle.  Tony Stark goes to beg Odin for help.  He decides that if he gets drunk enough Odin will listen.  Again, I am not making this up.  The book ends with Thor dropping in to fight the Hulk and the Thing at the same time.
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Book 5 opens right there with Cap fighting Sin and Thor taking on the two brutes.  Tony Stark finds out that if you get drunk enough you WILL see Odin (Must remember to try this).  Thor puts up a good fight but it'd be a close fight even if the Hulk and Thing weren't being powered by Asgardian hammers.  The other Avengers show up to back up Captain America but the Serpent has rejoined Sin and pretty much flicks them away.  Then, in a really cool moment, the Serpent breaks Cap's shield.  Franklin Richards uses his "most powerful mutant this week" power to cure the Thing.  Finally, Thor knocks the Hulk all the way out of this comic and into a crappy Dracula tie-in.  Spider-Man, after not really doing much to begin with this event, is sent home to be with his family as Thor collapses.
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Part 6 starts with them retreating.  Wow only 2 issues to go and the heroes are giving up.  They take Thor back to Asgard where Cap gives Odin the business for abandoning them yet again.  Meenwhile in the pages of Invincable Iron Man at this point, Tony Stark is actually in Asgard working on something to help turn the course of the fighting on Earth.  Anyway they ditch Thor and return to Earth where Captain America states that they need to evacuate the entire planet.  I am relieved that they did not go this direction and actually try to do this.  If they had I'm pretty sure I would have simply "Starjammers"'d the book down.  Spider-Man finally finds Aunt May who tells him he should be out there with the other heroes rather than running home.  I could have told him that last issue but alas, I haven't the ability to  Neverending Story into my comics.  Odin heals Thor and gives him the shiniest armor in all of Asgard as well as the fabled Asgardian lightsaber.  Iron Man is ready to make his own Asgardian weapons and has them all tossed into the forge as well as himself.  Yup, Tony Stark wants his armor to be enchanted as well and is unable to take it off and so is thrown in by Odin.  So either he's going to look bad ass after all this or the Invincable Iron Man comic will not be continuing past the event.  I think we all know which option Marvel wouldn't be willing to make less money by picking.  On Earth, Captain America has rallied the town of Broxton against the Serpent and his Worthy, and since he no longer has his shield he decides to pick up...a rifle.  Yeah...that'll work.
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The last issue is...wow, the last issue is heavy.  I could beat the guy who runs the comic shop over the head with this thing.  Not saying I'm gonna but I could.  It starts with Iron Man returning from Asgard with Thor and a collection of weapons for SOME of the Avengers.  I'm not sure why he picked specifically the ones he did but oh well.  He even states that he didn't make one for Captain America because "you can't beat that shield".  I don't think I was supposed to but I laughed pretty hard at this.  Anyway the weapons are handed out to Hawkeye, Wolverine (of course), Red She-Hulk, Ms. Marvel, Iron Fist, Black Widow, Dr. Strange, and Spider-Man who has ceased whining for the remainder of this event.  From here, things happen pretty quickly.  The Serpent literally becomes a Serpent.  Seriously, he turns into a big dragon and starts fighting Thor.  It's not terrible but I found it rather unnecessary.  It's not like the Serpent wasn't menacing or powerful enough to start with.  Thor's hammer is thrown down during the fight where it blows everyone back.  Captain America picks up the Hammer on one the SINGLE COOLEST PAGES IN A COMIC EVER.  But don't get too excited.  He doesn't keep it.  This could have been the coolest (even if it was temporary) thing to come out of this event and he doesn't even keep it.  The next few pages are just pure bad ass with everyone fighting the Worthy and Thor atop the Serpent's head.  He stabs the final boss in the head with the blue Asgardian sword...once...and it dies.  Pointy things that Odin just had lying around the whole time are aparently it's one weakness.  With the Serpent defeated the hammers of the Worthy fly from their hands, returning them to normal.  [Major Spoiler] Thor dies at this point as it was a prophecy that he would after defeating the Serpent.  Odin returns to Asgard alone and casts all of the Asgardians down to Earth.  Tony Stark appears to turn in all the weapons to the forge and they reforge Cap's shield.  Then there are a ton of epilogue's that fill the back of the book.  These each serve as a kind of prologue to different comics spinning out of this event.  (Personally I'm most looking forward to the Defenders)
So that's Fear Itself.  It's not the Secret Wars.  It's not Civil War.  They did kill off a whole lot of people though as well as destroy much of the Marvel Universe's cities.  It'll be interesting to see the next year of comics assuming they continue to aknowledge all of it.  Overall it was pretty bad ass even if a lot of the tie-ins were just cashing in on the event's name.  The biggest crime here is I kept seeing potential for where it could have gone at the end that didn't play out.  Simply for that reason I'm giving it a 4 out of 5.  Join us next week when Marvel's Squirrel Girl Island event begins.
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-The Hound
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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9 Things You Need To Know About X-Men (Before reading Regenesis)
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1: The X-men are based in San Francisco. In the last couple years, the X-Men lost their home in Weshtchester, New York and have since moved to the island of Utiopia (Which was Asteroid M before falling into San Francisco Bay).
2: Magneto is a member of the X-Men. 
3: Colossus is the Juggernaut. During the events of Uncanny X-man: Fear Itself peter selflessly took up the mantle of The Juggernaut so his sister, Magik, would not. This act has also lead to the splitting of Colossus and Shadowcat, as Kitty feel peter is willing to sacrifice too much. Bitch.
4: Nightcrawler is dead. The Nightcrawler in Uncanny X-Force will be the one from Age of Apocalypse.
5: Beast hates Cyclops because of X-Force (a group Cyclops started after Messiah Complex to take out people who would see all mutants dead) and therefore left the X-Men until the end of Schism where he rejoined on Wolverine's side.  He currently does not know that Logan has restarted X-Force.
6: Jean Grey is currently dead.
7: Scarlet Witch made it so that there were no more new mutants after the events of M-Day, that is until Hope Summers was born during Messiah Complex.  Cable took her into the future to flee from Bishop who believed that she would be the cause of his dark future.  Eventually they came back with Hope as a teenager and Cable appeared to die.  Since Hope's return, more new mutants have popped up with uncontrollable powers until she touches them.  It is still unknown what the full extent of her powers are but she does seem to borrow powers from nearbye mutants on occasion.
8: Archangel is currently the new Apocalypse. (This is Uncanny X-Force and as of yet that arc has not ended so it is unclear if he will remain that way by the end of it.)
9: Professor X may or may not make an appearance at any time during any X-Men book.
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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X-Men:Schism
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  With X-Men, we've come to expect big things.  Seriously, they never stop to take a break.  There's always some big event or another taking place that promises to change their lives forever.  Or, as the Bear and I say, "the most powerful mutant this week is...".  Over the years there have been a lot of events that stood out, most of which really are good and really did change things for the characters in a major way.  They range from alternate timelines such as Age of Apocalypse and Days of Future Past to the big ones that set the tone for the next couple years of X-books such as the Dark Phoenix Saga, House of M, Messiah Complex, Onslaught, and the Mutant Massacre.
This year's big thing is called Schism.  Why Schism?  Because in the aftermath of this storyline it promises to split the X-Men in two, creating two flagship X-Titles and thus making Marvel more money.  Now don't get me wrong, I love Marvel.  I love DC too for that matter.  However, I can't help but look at all the things that Marvel does as far as restarting titles at number one or making multiple titles for the same character without thinking it's to bring more money into an industry that honestly isn't doing all that well.  Don't worry I'm sure it'll come up from time to time but I promise to keep my complaining about how much Marvel comics cost down to a minimum.  Like not more than 30 times per review, I swear.  Okay 10.  Alright, alright, fine.  I'll try to only reserve said complaining for frivilous events that cross over into too many comics for no reason.  So still pretty often.
 I now realize that I've rambled for two paragraphs without really saying anything about Schism yet so I'm going to move on.  The first problem with Schism starts right way with the Prelude to Schism books.  At the time that I read them they got me excited for what was to come so in that sense they did their job but honestly, they are the worst part of this whole event as a whole.  Once I read Schism proper, I realized these prelude books had nothing to do with what was going on.  In fact, they didn't fit in at all.  If it weren't for the fact that they offer some nice flashbacks/insights to the four characters (Professor X, Magneto, Cyclops, Wolverine), I'd even consider just tossing them as far from my other Schism comics as possible.  Here's the problem; in prelude all the X-Men are in one room waiting for some big monster to come in and wipe them out.  They make it sound as if it's some ancient evil prophesized to destroy them.  Cyclops asks for advice from his most trusted X-Men (Magneto, Professor X, Wolverine).  This would be fine if not for the fact that 1) The thing that comes to destroy them is Schism is a sentinal 2) They did not have time to hold a big meeting like this 3) Professor X is nowhere to be found and Magneto is out for the count as well as several other characters that were in that room and 4) Cyclops' final decision is to stay and fight and Wolverine backs him up even though in Schism Wolverine wants to evacuate.
At this point I will leave those comics completely out of this and consider them some alternate timeline where Professor X is there, Chik-Fil-A doesn't exist, and Robin Williams is President.  
The first thing I'd like to point out to get it out of the way is that the covers and art for these books are all very good.  There got that out of the way.  It is interesting to note that they used a different artist for each of the 5 issues of this which only makes me wish it had come out faster as a result.  
Okay so the book opens with Cyclops and Wolverine going to some arms control conference to speak where Quentin Quire sets off the chain of events for this story.  I would like to personally thank Grant Morrison (who I actually think is amazing) for creating this guy.  I mean the pink hair really makes me take this character who I was not very familiar with before this seriously.  That aside, Quentin attacks the conference by making all the people there spill all their dirty secrets openly.  Apparently this one action is so bad that the leaders of the world decided THIS is what makes us want to get rid of all the mutants, not the hundreds of times they've caused massive property damage or gotten people killed while fighting.  No, this is the straw that did it.  At this point I think it's appropriate to point out my only other problem with Schism.  It's too short.  In 5 issues it just tries to build too many things that would have made more sense over a little longer span of time.  The rest of the first issue is filled with bad ass scenes of Cyclops and Wolverine fighting sentinals followed by the introduction of the new leader of the Hellfire Club who happens to be a child.  Okay, that's a little different and this kid is actually pretty scary, at least at first.
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Part 2 focuses on the X-Men taking out the old models of sentinals that various governments have sent out after mutants as well as new child leader of the Hellfire Club and his friends.  This is where they lose me a little.  His friends are crazy.  So crazy in fact that they kind of make him seem goofy just to be hanging around them.  Amidst all this craziness, the X-Men decide to attend the opening of a mutant history museum.  Thank you Cyclops. You obviously have your priorities straight.  The issue ends with the Hellfire Club attacking the event.  For some reason, the crazy ass children decide to lead the charge rather than run things from the shadows like any self respecting leader of an evil orginazation bent on world domination would.
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The third issue is totally worth it if only to see cyclops wearing a jetpack.  There's no point to it either.  He just uses a jetpack to leave Utopia even though I'm sure they have some other means of getting off the island.  I mean, there's no way they only have one plane.  Anyway, the Hellfire Club manage to incapacitate ALL of the adult X-Men in attendance with...brain...slugs.  Meenwhile, Cyclops is still on his way via jetpack, Wolverine is jumping over cars to get there and Captain America has a bubble gum ad before returning to the scene at the museum.  Things come to a climax when it suddenly is up to Idie, a character from Generation Hope who was also at the museum.  Wolverine is screaming at Cyclops not to tell her to kill the Hellfire Club but Cyclops simply informs her that they won't make it in time and that she should do what she feels she has to do.  Oh in case you're wondering how they are all speaking with each other, the entire conversation was telepathic.  The X-Men are too good for cell phones so they use the "Stepford Cuckoos" (I am not making that name up. That is what they call them...) as telepathic phone operators. So anyway, of course Idie kills the Hellfire Club (minus somehow the kids) and saves the X-Men though, convienently they keep the brain slugs on for the duration of this story.  Wolverine is pissed at Scott for letting Idie kill and thus begins what this story is really about.  Once again, I will point out that if this had been about twice the size or even just a couple issues longer this problem between Logan and Scott wouldn't seem so rushed.  From here on out is spirals out of control until they end up fighting.  The issue ends with the most bad ass sentinal ever literally creating itself from the debris of the museum.  I actually think this thing is one of the cooler things to come out of this event.
I'm not going to go too much into the 2 Generation Hope issues that tie into this but I will say that they are really good and if you're going to bother reading Schism, I reccomend those as well.  They go more into what the kids are doing during all this and match up perfectly with the other issues unlike some other tie-ins for Schism that shall not be named again.  Robin Williams.  That is all.
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The last 2 issues I'll condense here just because they really feel like one part due to the fact that there are alot of full page and 2 page pieces of art with the sentinal and Cyclops fighting Wolverine.  Here's the basics.  They find they can't defeat the sentinal because it just keeps rebuilding itself.  So they go back to Utopia and debate what to do as it comes for them through the water.  Wolverine wants to evacuate the kids as they are the only ones left there who can fight.  Cyclops wants to make a stand and leave it up to the children whether they fight or not.  Wolverine is the best there is at what he does and apparently what he does is plant C4 all over the island.  That's not very nice.  He then goes to Scott with the detenator, saying he will blow up the island to stop the sentinal and that Cyclops should evacuate the kids.  When Cyclops refuses to leave Utopia they begin to fight for the detenator and the sentinal looms over them.  The kids do decide to fight and manage to hold off the sentinal until the other X-Men return from the various locations they had been and take out the sentinal quickly.  Again, this seems a bit rushed.  If this thing was so powerful it shouldn't have been something that could be easily defeated simply by more of the adult X-Men being there.  In the end Wolverine packs up along with a group of other X-Men and heads back for New York.  Now it goes back to the Hellfire Club who it turns out are all dead save for the children.  Yes, the kids killed them all and are now the only members of the Hellfire Club.  Wonderful.  And as it turns out, they did all that just to sell more of that bad ass sentinal to various nations after their old models failed them.
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In the end this wasn't a terrible event.  I do like where their going into the next year with X-Men now and am actually excited to see two completely different teams.  If you read this and enjoy it, it's also worth picking up the Regenisis one shot and the final issue of Uncanny X-Men.  Those both take place at the end of schism as well and are very well done.  Still, it'll be nice next year with them doing something with Cable and Hope again.  Those stories are always amazing like last year's Second Coming arc.  Choosing to ignore the prelude stuff entirely, I'll give this story a 3.5 out of 5.  It would be a 4 if it were longer and better paced but ah well.  It is what it is and the X-Men remain awesome at any rate.  Join us next week when the most powerful mutant will be Morph!
-The Hound
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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The reviewers behind Dissected Crusaders (and their respective styles): The Kitten- The newbie. Has knowledge of both DC and Marvel universes through the cartoons and video games of the 90's. She has always had an interest in getting into reading comics but always felt a bit overwhelmed in trying to figure out where to begin. She saw "the New 52" as the perfect starting point for her journey into comics. The Kitten strives to give informative and fresh perspectives by writing reviews that would make an English teacher weep with joy. The Bear- The supplier. Following comics off and on over the years, The Bear has been buying comics for a while now and has roped both his Fiancée(The Kitten) and BFF(The Hound) into reviewing comics with him. His reviews are written like more of a structured lecture than a paper, The Bear strives to give his honest to god and unadulterated opinions by focusing on the "thought" rather than the "grammar;" however, his reviews would give an English teacher high blood pressure.  The Hound-The Veteran. Having followed comics closely for as long as he's remembered, and buying comics off and on since he was a child, The Hound knows more than any of us; however, he will be focusing on a more humorous review style. His reviews will be for Marvel comics.
All three of us read both DC and Marvel comics and are all in agreement that both are "Equally as good and equally as bad."  Our goal is to eradicate the misconceptions everyone has about comics right now as well as give unique points of view outside of normal reviewers. We all come from different backgrounds with differing opinions, giving us a unique reviewing style as a whole.
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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  So! Here is a list of the current comics we will be reviewing and so on:
Action Comics
All-Star Western
Animal man
Aquaman
Batgirl
Batman
Batman: The Dark Knight
Batman and Robin
Batwing
Batwoman
Birds of Prey
Blue Beetle
Captain Atom
Catwoman
DC Universe Presents
Deathstroke
Demon Knights
Detective Comics
The Flash
Green Arrow
Green lantern
Green Lantern Corps
Green Lantern: New Guardians
The Huntress
I, Vampire
Justice League
Justice League Dark
Justice League International
Men of war
Mister Terrific
Nightwing
Penguin: Pain and Prejudice
Redhood and the Outlaws
Red Lanterns
The Savage Hawkman
The Shade
Suicide Squad
Superboy
Supergirl
Superman
Swamp Thing
Teen Titians
Wonder Woman
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dissectedcrusaders · 13 years
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Soon this blog will become a forum of comics review for the DC comics me and my fiancee get each week starting in November we will give Semi-Daily reviews of comics. At that time each of the 40+ comics we review will get their first 3 issues reviewed (save penguin, huntress, and the shade). Full list of comics we will be review will be posted soon.
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