#Phil doesn’t count in my brain lmao | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

elias-code · 3 years

Text

The Swine’s Scribe

Characters: c!Technoblade x gn!reader, an appearance by Philza

Background: You're in Techno's cabin after getting the rest of his wolves from L’Manburg after the second war. You were originally rescued by Techno from a blizzard after running from the first L'Manburg explosion (your house was among those destroyed.)

Summary: When Techno gets back from the second L'Manburg war, he lets go of a lot of emotions by ranting to you. You, being concerned about his mental wellbeing, ask if you can do anything for him, and eventually, he kisses you, which leads to some close-calls with Phil and a whole lot of smut and fluff.

Wordcount: 3291 (according to google docs lmao)

Warnings: NSFW, swearing, blood/wounds, biting, getting caught

I REPEAT NSFW, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

-------------------------------- Enjoy :) ----------------------------------

Ever since Techno brought you in from the cold months ago, you've been doing little chores for him in a way to repay his kindness. Even though he was the one who summoned the withers after the initial explosions, you felt safe around him. It had been hard to get used to at first, but now you felt comforted by his presence.

For the past week, you've been writing his journal for him after he broke his hand sparring with Phil. His hand has since healed, but you insisted that you do it for him, and he put up little protest.

"It was stressful, seeing your friends leave like that, in the blink of an eye. I don't trust anyone anymore, not after Tommy betrayed me. I gave him a roof over his head, hid him from Dream, one of the most powerful people on the server, AND I trusted him with my Axe of Peace." Technoblade's tone was strained and he let out a huff.

"Techno," you empathised, "are you sure you're okay after today?"

"I'm fine, please keep writing." He only ever said please when he was really serious, clearly, he was not interested in talking.

"Now, I refuse to bow to the voices. They want blood and I won't let them. Too many allies have died for me or have disappeared onto the other side, only to reemerge when they need ME, never when I need THEM."

Again, you piped in, "Techno, you're clearly not ok," his pale skin was flushed red and his eyebrows knit together into a grimace, "If there's anything I can do to help, please tell me."

He went silent.

"You don't have to talk about it if it's really getting to you... Or you could let it out. Either way, I'm here to help," You said.

"I'll think about it. For now, keep writing,"

For another half hour, he ranted about the destruction of L'Manburg and his dramatic reenactment was accented by occasional yelling and hand gestures. Suddenly, he stops speaking and gets a puzzled look on his face, "Um, what- what's the correct phrasing for - I guess - 'horny for violence'?" The tips of his ears were bright red, matching the blush now forming on his cheeks.

You chuckle, "I think it's hungry for violence..."

"Ah, that's it," Techno states, and then he completed his recounting of events. There's a bubble of silence in the air and he bursts it by asking, "Do you have any thoughts?"

"You know my thoughts, Techno..."

"I think I know, but give me words, I can't read minds."

"You're not healthy, you need help. You need better friends and a proper support system. Right now you really only have Phil, and I guess me if I even count."

"You count."

Now it was your turn to blush, but you continue, "Either way, that's not enough! You deserve more than you're getting. I can tell that even without the things you've had me write down. You're carrying so much weight, Tech."

"I didn't know you cared," he seems touched by your words, "I suppose I don't know a whole lot about you."

"And yet, you trust me with your deepest, darkest secrets, Technoblade."

"One thing I can trust you to do is help me with my armour."

He was still wearing the enchanted netherite chestplate and pants, both of which you started fumbling with. The leather straps were clasped tightly, as to not come off in battle, but you managed to manoeuvre them enough to get them to let go.

As the chestplate was lifted off of him, he hissed and then grunted. You look at the spot his hand flew to on his back, where his shirt had torn to reveal a big gash in his shoulder. It ran from his shoulder blade to his left pec, one of the only places where he was unarmoured.

"Holy shit Tech, why didn't you tell me this was here?!"

"I didn't want to worry you," He chuckled and then hissed again, "I guess that plan failed."

You did not find it funny. You immediately went to get the supplies Phil kept in his house, knowing that Techno didn't keep anything but healing potions in his chests. Phil was eager to help and he handed some bandages and rubbing alcohol to you so you could clean the wound. You also grabbed a spare scrap of leather for him to bite down on.

When you returned, Techno had moved to sit on his bed where he had already removed the greaves and discarded them beside him. You came to his side, putting down the alcohol, rag, and bandage.

"This is probably going to hurt, so I need you to bite down on this," you said, handing him the leather scrap.

"Ok," he said, watching you grab the alcohol and rag from the floor, "Just- just tell me when,"

"Alright," He put the leather in between his teeth, biting lightly, "you ready?"

He nodded, you put the alcohol rag onto the blood-crusted gash. He let out a sharp, low hiss, tightening his jaw on the leather to release some of the pain. You cleaned up quickly to minimise the pain and then wrapped it in the bandage, leaving some so you could clean and replace it later.

"All done, you ok?" You looked at him, one of his eyes was watering.

"Yeah, the pain's much worse when you're not pumped full of adrenaline."

"You better not be hiding any more gashes under all of those clothes,"

"Wanna find out?" He flashed you a smirk, amused by his own confidence.

"I'll take your word for it, but you're going to need to change that shirt, it's covered in blood."

"At least it's not my blood," you shivered a bit at that remark and helped him take his shirt off, careful not to remove the fresh bandages along with it.

For the first time, you saw him without a shirt off. He seemed surprisingly slender for being as strong as he is. There were numerous scars that etched every battle and lesson learned into his skin. Lots of them looked older than you expected and you suddenly realised that he must have been fighting for a long time before coming to the server.

"Like what you see?" he asked, and you rushed to put the shirt down and find an excuse.

"Um, I- I was just looking at your scars, I'll bring this downstairs,"

You rushed away, turning bright red, embarrassed that he had noticed your stares. You absent-mindedly tossed the shirt into the 'wash pile' and then you remembered, in your rush, you had forgotten his greaves. With a huff, you climbed the ladder back to his room.

Techno sat in front of the fireplace, now roaring with renewed vigour from the log he'd tossed in. His pink hair had been undone from the messy braid he had put in that morning. It was almost dyed red and black by the blood and soot in it. He was playing with it, picking out debris and running his fingers through the more knotted bits.

“Tech?”

“Hmm?” he looked up at you, still fiddling with the hair in his hands.

You sat down next to him and he relaxed into a cross-legged position, with one knee tucked under his chin. His free hand is right next to yours and he doesn’t look at you. His face is red, probably from the fire.

“You looked like you were in a trance? Are you ok?”

Silence filled the room again,"

“You don’t have to tell me but just know I’m here if you need to talk. Obviously, I haven’t tattled about anything yet or Tommy and the Butchers would be knocking your door down by now.”

“The voices are quieter than normal. I can hear myself think.”

You try to be encouraging “So? What are you thinking about?”

He looks you in the eyes, they’re deep, his pupils adjusting makes you feel like he’s looking into your soul.

“Um, I’m not sure you’d want to know.”

You frown and protest since you’re now more curious than ever but still a bit freaked out. "C'mon now you've got me curious,"

Techno looked away, solemnly gazing at the fire “I meant what I said about you being a trusted friend. I don't get many of those so, thanks. As for why this is coming up now, well, I guess I’m lonely.”

You hesitated, “Me too, Tech. You're kind of the only one I trust, and I guess Phil, too, but I'd trust you with my life.”

He blushes, looks away, and tucks a strand of hair behind his ear before turning back to you and putting his hand on yours.

You immediately flush and you see a grin seep onto his face.

"I'm not really talking about friends anymore. I want... someone..." he almost whispers

"You mean?" he nods, "I guess I've never had anyone before. I think it'd be nice to see what it'd be like."

“I think we can kill two birds with one stone here, don’t you?”

Now you're both bright red, nervous, schoolkids who gingerly lean into each other's faces, gaze fixed on the other's lips. Your hearts beat hard while your brains rush to make sure you feel insecure, the voices in Techno's mind screaming excitedly.

“You good up there Techno? Your light is still on, it's far past midnight, mate!” Phil shouts from the bottom of the ladder.

“I’m fine, just," He pulls away from you, "reading. Goodnight Phil,”

Techno's ears perk up to listen to the receding footsteps. You’re both standing now, he's standing over the trapdoor, making sure Phil had gone. Once he was sure, he comes over and kisses you hard.

“Tech-"

“Is this ok? I’m not doing anything wrong am I?”

You think He’s clearly never done this before, as you respond "Yeah, I like it..." you continue, stumbling towards his bed where you’re initially just kissing like two teenagers as if it were your first time, desperate, but awkward.

Your hand was pressing against his chest as you laid next to him, tasting each other's spit, learning the ropes since neither of you had ever done this before.

The light from the fire made your shadows dance across the wall, arms moving to hold each other closer, legs wrapping around Techno's, bodies shifting so he's on top of you. Only the roar and crackle of the fire and the occasional grunt or gasp from you or Techno could be heard.

--- Smut begins here ---

As you both part to take a breath, he pulls your shirt over his head. When he leans into the crook of your neck, you notice the tent in his pants pressing against your inner thigh. In between your own legs, there was a pool of slick forming.

You moan, loud, fully knowing that would send Techno wild. He pushes further towards you and holds your arms above your head so he could press his mouth against your neck, leaving red, hot, sticky marks leading from your collarbone to your abdomen.

You're both panting as he lets go of your arms and you wrap them around his neck, pulling his head in for a long, deep kiss. His hot breath warms your cheeks as he repositions himself.

"Hey, is this still ok?" He asks between breaths.

"Abso-fucking-lutely,"

He fully loses himself, taking his hand from your cheek and moving it to your pants, never losing eye contact. You nod and he pushes his hand into the spot between your legs which was now drenched in slick. He found his way to your hole and pushed his index finger into it, creating a sensation you'd never felt before.

Instinctually, you gasp and then moan, harder than before. You rock your hips to his rhythm while he continues to press bruises into your torso. Eventually, he brings his face back to yours and kisses you. You let out another moan into his mouth. He grunts and then chuckles, kissing your cheek before pulling his finger out and then going back in with two.

Now, you're whining, pulling on his long, pink hair. You notice everything in those moments, his rhythmic breaths into your neck and pumping of his finger in and out of your sex, his other hand holding your waist, pushing upwards to caress you, his soft hair in your hand.

"Is it my turn now?" He gruffs.

You hum in affirmation as he pulls away and you kick off your pants as he undoes his own. You immediately notice his size. Compared to his fingers, which were pretty long and thick, to begin with, due to his big hands, his member was a giant. His hand that had previously been half inside of you was now working his dick, its head coated in pre-cum.

While you had seen other penises before, mostly in study, you had never seen one up close, and you'd only seen ones on humans. The hybrid piglin-shapeshifter was sporting a human-like head and shaft, 9 inches (at least) all the way down to a knot... he had a knot...

He notices you gaping at his dick and grins, leaning into you again. "Wanna help me with this, or... should I help m'self?"

Eager to please, you lightly push him forward so you're both sitting up while your hand inspects the new acquaintance. You look up at Techno for guidance. He nods and pushes your hand down with his own. He guides your hand up and down the shaft until he’s no longer guiding you and you’re doing it all yourself.

He does the same with you. The space between your legs was now, simply put, slippery. He did his best to please you, eventually managing three fingers easily.

The pants and gasps were syncing, the knot in your stomach growing stronger while you danced your mouth on the head of his member. He lets out a particularly loud grunt and removes his fingers from your sex. You suddenly feel empty, and he pushes you over onto your stomach.

He puts himself under you, his dick under your mouth. You lick the ever-present pre-cum off of the head of his dick once again and then begin to bob your head up and down, managing to fit him halfway before choking on him. His groans were now louder than yours, becoming more frequent.

"Ughh- fuck," he moans.

Now he holds your head and gently begins to fuck your mouth. Your bobbing was no longer enough, he wanted more. He thrust his hips into you, managing to get a third of the way into you and then it turns into deepthroating after every thrust.

You gag, unable to take him all the way, and so he decides enough is enough and you both rush to get him inside of you. He gets up, moving to position himself above you. You continue to stay in the position he left you in, on your hands and knees.

"Turn around," Techno says.

And so you do, you lay on your back, full of anticipation and covered in juices. He puts his hand on your stomach, leaning in to kiss you lightly, pressing more red marks into your sides, slowly turning you so you face the wall.

He pulls away and holds your leg away from the other, practically putting you into the splits.

"Techno..." You whisper.

"Hmm?"

"Is this gonna hurt?"

"Dunno, darlin'," He leans in again, "let me know if it gets too hard, ok? I'll stop if you say so."

You nod and kiss for confirmation, reaching to hold your own leg up to give him full access.

He inserts the head and you can already feel the stretch, slightly painful but you push on, your fingers grasping the sheets to keep yourself grounded. He’s pushing into you slowly, making sure you're not getting in over your head. You hold the sheet tighter, groaning from the stretch.

He pulls out slightly and the pressure releases. You moan hard, making sure Techno knows that you like what you feel. He pushes in again and begins to thrust into you. Techno is getting further and further with every thrust, and you moan between every breath. He's three-fifths of the way in and he's only getting harder.

Techno's hand replaces yours, keeping your leg raised as you move your hand to work yourself along with him. Your heart beats faster and he picks up the pace. He can get all the way to the knot before pulling out and thrusting in again.

"Tech... Fuck, it's so gooood..."

Now he's becoming sparattic and his face goes into your neck, biting softly, barely enough for blood to form. The knot in your stomach tightens and you scream into the pillow as he pushes all the way in, his skin hitting yours as his knot slips into you.

He moans and thrusts lightly into you, coming inside of you. You feel the pressure inside of you release as you come with him. You're being filled with his sperm, eventually spilling out along with your own come onto the sheet.

He continues to work you with his hand, breathing heavily into your neck. Your heartbeats are in sync and his juices continue to spill out of you, soaking everything below you. You try to look him in the eye as he shakes slightly, somehow still coming.

"Tech? You're still..." you gasp. "I know, sorry... it might be a while..." He grunts out.

Techno's ears perk up and he shoves you under the blanket, still stuck inside of you with the knot.

"What-"

He puts a hand over your mouth as you quiver underneath him, overstimulated by the pressure and his hand which still rested in between your thighs. What the hell is he doing?! The non-stop cum is weird enough, what-

Soon enough, your questions were answered when you heard the footsteps downstairs.

“Do you have my hat?” Phil's voice yells from the base of the ladder.

“Can't you-" he breathes, "you get it in the morning?”

“No, I'm going out super early tomorrow to scout out and make sure we haven’t been followed back.”

“Uh," fuck "it’s on the chair next to my desk up here? I’m in bed…”

Phil comes up the ladder and opens the hatch, eventually finding his hat while techno covers your mouth and lays belly to belly with you, he’s still dribbling a bit, so are you. You’re whimpering slightly.

Phil stops at the trapdoor. “Did you mean to leave the fire on mate?”

“Uh, yeah I was gonna let it burn… I was cold”

“Where’s your friend, loverboy?”

You feel Techno blush above you, his warmth suddenly radiating out from him.

“Um. They went to trade with some piglins since we’re almost out of spectral arrows.”

“Alright let me know when they get back, I just want to make sure they’re ok. Ever since you found them in the snow you’ve been doing better, it seems. Almost like you two are a... thing?”

The question lingered momentarily and you could almost hear Phil's eyebrow raise before Techno answered.

“Hmm, thank you, Phil. Close the trapdoor when you leave, I don’t want the warmth to leave.”

“Alright.”

Finally, the footsteps were gone. He pulls the blanket off of them and he takes his hand off of your mouth. You gasp for dramatic effect, laughing quietly to yourselves at the close call.

"Can I tell you something?" Techno whispers into your ear.

"Yes, you're literally deep inside of me, I'm guaranteed to be interested in what you have to say,"

"I love you"

"I love you, too..."

#technoblade #dsmp x reader #techno x reader #mcyt smut #dreamsmp #c!technoblade x reader #c!techno #first fic sorry lmao #c!techno x reader #eli scribe #Elias original

993 notes · View notes

vneuns · 3 years

Text

half a heart

pairing : c!dream x gn!reader

warnings : angst? sort of

word count : 0.9k

a/n: i meant to publish this last night but i ended up falling asleep lmao

Dream stood silently in front of you as he watched you spill your heart out to him telling him what he was doing was wrong, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. There was too much joy in his manipulation. It was addicting, and he just couldn’t stop.

“Please listen to me.” Your cheeks were stained with tears and the beige cardigan was doing nothing to warm your cold body. “I’m listening to you Y/n but what you’re saying doesn’t interest me.” You sucked in a breath. Knowing he didn’t mean it.

Unless he did… No. No no no of course he didn’t mean it. This was Dream but not your Dream. You didn’t know when whoever this was in your boyfriend's body but all you knew was that you wanted him gone.

“I think you should go.” You whispered you whipped away at the water on your cheeks. Everything in you screaming to tell him that wasn’t what you wanted. You wanted him to talk to you. That’s all you wanted. All you’ve wanted for a while.

“Yeah I think that’s a good idea.” And with that he picked up his purple enchanted sword and left your shared home.

The second the door closed you had fallen to your knees the wall you had put up in front of your boyfriend now crumbling down leaving you a crying mess on the floor.

Never in the three years of your relationship with Dream did you ever have an argument so bad that he’d leave without apologizing, or without reassuring you he’d be back.

You were woken up by multiple harsh knocks on your door. You got up groggily yelling that you were coming.

Your eyes were bloohshot red, spending most of your night curled in a ball balling your eyes out whilst cuddling your boyfriends cold pillow that had smelled of him.

When you opened the door you were surprised to find Quackity on the opposite side with a distressed look on his face. “Hey quack what’s-.”

“It’s Dream. They locked him up last night.” Your eyebrows shot up in surprise and confusion. “Wha- for what?”

“They won’t tell us anything but I heard Sam talking to schallt about mind control or something.”

“Are they gonna kill him?” You whispered timidly nibbling at one of your knuckles, something you tended to do when you were stressed out. “I’m not too sure, but I’m gonna go tell the others are you going to be alright?” You nodded giving him a fake smile he couldn’t see through to put down his worries. “Okay I’ll be back later on.” Once the door was closed a raspy breath left your mouth, the tears forming just as they did the night before.

Of course you and everyone else knew about your boyfriends psychopathic tendencies, but you hadn’t realised how bad it had really gotten. Yeah maybe you were blinded by the fact that you had known the man for so long that the thought of him hurting other people never crossed your mind.

You leaned against your front door sliding down it as the tears came faster now, you realizing just how blind you had been this entire time.

A few weeks had passed and you hadn’t left your house at all for anything. Of course your friends would come by and check on you or bring you food, but it never worked. They'd always just end up finding you on your bed wearing or holding Dreams sweater like it was the end of the world.

And even after he was granted visitation rights you refused. You couldn’t bring yourself to push down the pain you were feeling to go visit someone who had been wanting to hurt people for so long.

All of his best friends would try and convince you to go, because he was “just as bad as you” but you ignored their attempts. As much as your heart was pleading with you to go visit the love of your life, your brain knew you wouldn’t last two seconds in the same room as him without breaking down.

That was until Phil visited. “I’m not going to visit him Phil I don’t care what you say, or do, I’m not going. I can’t” Your voice was muffled into your pillow hair disheavealed and you didn’t smell the best but no one pointed it out knowing it was most definitely not the time.

“I didn’t come here to talk about him, or force you to do anything. I came to talk about you.” He sat himself on the chair in the corner of your room that faced the bed.

“What about me? I’m an emotional mess because i was to blind to realize that my own boyfriend was a psychopathic manipulator that tried to brainwash everyone.”

“No, I don't want to know about the obvious.” He told you light heartedly.

“I want to know what’s going on inside that brain of yours.” Your eyebrows raised in surprise. You moved your head a bit so you could see him clearly out of one eye.

“I miss him, I miss him a lot.” Phil nodded waiting for you to continue. “But after that fight and him practically pushing me away, i just felt like self isolation would be best.”

The blonde man across from you nodded once again as he leaned back in the cushioned seat. “you need to go visit him.”

“I can’-.”

“you can and you will not if ands or buts about it Y/n.”

#mcyts #mcyt imagine #mcyt x yn #mcyt x reader #dream mcyt #dream #dream smp #angst #c!dream #c!dream x reader #c!dream c gn!reader #c!dream x fem!reader #c!dream x male reader #dream x reader #dream x yn #phil #philza #wilbur #quackity

495 notes · View notes

feelingofcontent · 3 years

Text

DNP Rewatch: CRINGE ATTACK

Date video was published: 10/01/2013 (X)

DNP Main Channel Rewatch: 198

Dan’s making more regular videos again at this point.

0:00 - Did they get a new light at this point? The lighting in the last few videos has been INTENSE.

0:05 - talking about what he shared in My First Time (which was more than a week before this but anyway...)

0:25 - very dramatic “a cringe attack” there

0:34 - The Pokémon battle scene/editing on this is so great

0:38 - borrowing literally all of Phil’s Pokémon shirts for this scene. I love it. Dan is always thinking about the details.

1:01 - why DO brains do this. Just let me forget!

1:30 - wtf is a “football party.” Somehow I don’t think Dan would have enjoyed that anyway.

1:38 - oh Dan. He’s definitely improved on gift-giving at least it seems.

1:43 - well that one’s just...why.

2:12 - “flailing like an octopus”...Dan has great descriptors

2:39 - LMAO at “the power of Christ compels you” part 😂😂

2:56 - Dan doesn’t use the “science” fake glasses Phil does...he just used Phil’s actual glasses, lol

3:15 - positive-spin as usual to conclude a Dan video

3:37 - I always think space-jumper character is meant to be Phil in these skits.

4:38 - love the counting-down and Phil just laughing at how ridiculous Dan is

I thought Dan may have filmed this while Phil was on his trip, but Phil’s helping with at least one of the clips so I guess not! This is a classic Dan video.

#dan and phil #dnp #dnpRewatch #daniel howell #danisnotonfire #dan howell #daniel howell videos #CRINGE ATTACK

23 notes · View notes

kae-karo · 3 years

Text

fic writer interview!

i saw @prince-liest do this and thus i will take ur 'tagging anyone who wants to do this' seriously lmaoooo (also hi btw hope ur well!!! 💜💜)

How many works do you have on AO3?

ahaha,,,,,159 lmao

What's your total AO3 word count?

fdsjkkjlsfdklj as of today, 2,089,769

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

only three fsdjkldslfkj the phandom (dan&phil), bnha, and genshin!

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

chosen (x) - zhongchi (genshin)

to love (and be loved in return) (x) - kaeluc (genshin)

little bird (x) - dabihawks (bnha)

feet don't touch the ground (x) - xiaoven (genshin)

i knew you were fire (x) - dabihawks (bnha)

honestly none of that surprises me except that little bird is still up there, although i think i owe that to sif (@the-final-sif) for sharing it around the time it got posted since it was partly inspired by her raptor stress grip post!!

the rest are all chaptered fics, which is mostly what i expected to be in the top 5 lmao

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

yes!!! always!!!! no matter what u comment, i will respond!!! and if i don't, it's probably cause ao3 didn't notify me properly or i didn't see it in my inbox or something

as for why, it's mostly to do with like...i know how hard it can be for some people to comment, even just a bunch of heart emojis or a 'i loved this!' or something short and simple? and it means a lot to me that ppl are going out of their way to say something nice, no matter how small, and it's really really important to me to acknowledge that

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

hmm,,,,,this is a hard one, cause for a very long time, my policy was that my fic would always have a happy ending? and for a long time, that was true!! but the dabihawks interaction (during the raid) broke me, and from an emotional standpoint, i think freeing icarus (x) is probably the one that has the angstiest ending of the two or so that i wrote in that time?

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

u know i really haven't written any crossovers? it's normally not my thing cause my brain typically focuses on a single thing and doesn't really have the capacity to think about more than that, so i end up writing just au-style or fusion-style (shoutout to that one bnha but it was scooby doo fic i wrote - x)

i don't think i'd be opposed to writing a crossover but i'd have to be SUPER inspired by the idea and both fandoms lmao

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

aha yes, i have. the only straight up hate i've received was on a kaeluc fic (surprisingly not because it was kaeluc, but bc i was 'mistreating' kaeya in the fic) - to be entirely fair, the commenter pointed out something that i hadn't realized myself, and it led to a second piece of the story that helped me tie up some loose ends, but...let's just say they weren't very kind about their feelings lmao

other than that, i had someone very upset because i didn't tag which character was bottoming in a fic (valid if that bugs u!) and they read through most of it before getting to the smut (and said that they enjoyed everything up to that point) then said they were 'disgusted' by it. i have opinions on that and a few other comments they made, but i will keep them to myself lmao

and beyond that, just a few ppl on my xiaoven fic saying that they were unhappy about the background kaeluc (which is tagged lmao) - really no hate whatsoever til genshin, honestly, which is...very hmmmm :) lmao

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

yep!!! mostly vanilla or vanilla-adjacent lmao i'm not super into heavy kink, although i know if epi reads this she's gonna call me out for being a monsterfucker bc of my dragon!zhongli smut :) lmaoooo but really i tend to write pretty vanilla smut! i also prefer to avoid any noncon/dubcon or hate sex or anything particularly angsty, just not my jam to write!

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

hmm i don't think so? although i don't heavily monitor ao3 (or wattpad/ffn), so i can't really say that for sure lmao

Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes!!! i've had a few fics translated to russian (little bird is one of them!) which is very sweet and i hope that anyone who prefers to read in russian has been enjoying those fics!!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

alksdfjklsdf only once, and it's deadass how me and rose got together. we decided to co-write a podcast au fic for the phandom (x) and ended up flirting via google docs asldkfjkldsfj

What’s your all time favourite ship?

what a horrible question, making me choose between my children like this!!!! sdlfkjdskf tbh i'm not sure i have a real answer bc it changes as i go? and 'favorite' is so vague,,,,,favorite to read? to write about? to think about? asdklfjkjsdfk i really don't know if i have an answer, but i'll maybe say kaeluc for now lmao

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

well first and foremost, with only 2 exceptions, i never post a fic unless it's done. i tend to follow wherever my passion leads my brain, so i'm notorious for jumping around between stories and taking breaks from long fic and returning later on to finish them, and i know that i would not do well under the pressure of posting something unfinished and trying to finish it in a timely manner

that said, many wips sit in my google doc folder, but one is Well Known as the one that has followed me through both the phandom and bnha (rose keeps asking who i'm gonna switch the chars to in genshin, but i think it suits bakudeku too well to do that) - only the lonely survive. it sits at like 36k in my wip folder, and i adore the story dearly and i want very much to finish it, but it never makes it quite to the forefront of my motivation, and so it rarely if ever gets worked on...i hate the idea of 'never' finishing it, but it's unfortunately quite likely that i won't 😭😭😭

What are your writing strengths?

emotion!!! and immersion!!! it's my goal in a fic to make it as immersive as possible and saturated with emotion to help convey that feeling of being in the place of the pov character, and i think i do it pretty well. also just bc i feel a little obligated to say it - another strength is actually sitting down and putting words down. i know that's a struggle for a lot of writers and i often get,,,,lovingly bullied? i guess? lmao for being able to bash out a few k in a day most days

What are your writing weaknesses?

this isn't so much a weakness i guess but i am basically incapable of treating crack fic as crack. if i have a cracky idea, it will, without a doubt, end up turning into a Perfectly Serious fic somehow (notable 'crack treated so seriously that it's no longer crack' fics include: todoroki doing the freeze-the-ocean thing from frozen 2, 'shmigaraki', todo and denki get together bc of vine references, the league sells feet pics, shiggy and natsu own a nightclub/bakery, scooby doo but make it bnha, and dabi getting his ears pierced at claire's)

but in all seriousness, i think my main weakness is that i often get comfortable? and i'm not one to typically push myself forcefully out of my comfort zone when it comes to stories that i come up with on my own, which often means that ideas inspired by discussions with others are what prompt me to branch out and try new things?

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

i think, like anything, it has its place? there are certainly stories where it makes sense to do that and even adds depth to a story, although i personally am not exceptionally comfortable enough with other languages (except maybe asl) to do that in fic myself without the assistance of someone very comfortable with that language lmao

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

the phandom! not really my jam to write rpf anymore but it definitely got me started and i'm really grateful for my time writing there, as everyone was super supportive and kind, and it was really a perfect place for a beginner to get comfortable and practice

What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

again, forcing me to choose between my children...i really don't know that i can pick one fic bc they all exist in such wildly different spaces? i poured my worldbuilding soul into the king of disaster series (mainly dabihawks - x), exile (dan and phil - x) was my first massively long fic, our hearts are heavy burdens we shouldn't have to bear alone (chayea - x) is probably my favorite character/character dynamic study, i'm exceptionally proud of the smut in chosen (zhongchi - x), the list goes on and on and on lmao like. i could probably list half my fics as favorites in some regard dsflkjdfsjkl

anyway, tyty bellamy for putting this on my dash so i could do it as well!!

tagging: literally anyone who wants to do this, i have so many writer friends slkdjfjklsdf but please please tag me if u do it so i can read urs!!! 💜💜💜

#writing

15 notes · View notes

punkscowardschampions · 3 years

Text

Ruby & Cosmo

Ruby: Dying to know is every date colour coded? ❤️

Cosmo: Oh, God 😅 How unintentionally cringe

Cosmo: That sums up how well it went, sadly

Ruby: the quick reply had me thinking you were back early or answering in the middle of dinner

Cosmo: 🤫

Cosmo: I’d never!

Cosmo: It was a favour and I think that showed

Cosmo: She’s my cousin’s friend and just got dumped, sweet girl but perhaps not ready to be great company

Ruby: explains the 🌹

Cosmo: Not very personal or too basic?

Ruby: a nice try if it was your first date ever but I know it’s not

Cosmo: Thank God I didn’t get another bouquet 😏

Cosmo: They weren’t buy one get one free though, before you say

Ruby: they looked expensive

Ruby: she would’ve felt guilty throwing them back in your face

Cosmo: I told you I weren’t texting under the table, why would she need to?

Ruby: you told me why, they’re impersonal & basic

Ruby: & heartbreak makes you unhinged

Cosmo: I wouldn’t call her unhinged

Cosmo: at least not to her face, right

Ruby: 😅

Ruby: or your cousin’s

Ruby: Are you staying out in town or going home to change?

Cosmo: I don’t fancy showing up in the club in this

Cosmo: never mind hearing what my friends would have to say

Cosmo: What are you up to?

Ruby: the VIP area has seen worse, you don’t look like you raided the Gucci sale rail, eyes closed

Ruby: & your friends have worn worse, but I won’t say it to their faces

Ruby: I’m waiting for my own friends to be done making their own questionable outfit choices as usual

Cosmo: Careful, that was almost a compliment and not just a drag of the lads

Cosmo: not undeserved on their end but what did I do to make you decide to be nice to me?

Cosmo: besides entertain you with my dating woes whilst they redo their makeup, again

Ruby: You know how to dress, it’s a fact

Ruby: & I didn’t decide to be nice, it just happened

Cosmo: Not that you’re not usually nice in general

Cosmo: but here I am, feeling special, like 💖🤩

Cosmo: It’s also a fact, though not an impressive one, that I’m not lame enough to go in for that negging bullshit, so whatever I end up doing, calling you a bitch ain’t on the agenda

Ruby: there you were down in the dumps about your disaster date, I thought I’d try to help

Ruby: I wouldn’t, it only works for Mason when everyone’s too busy watching his feet move to care about his mouth & that’s not the audience you’ve got atm

Cosmo: I think I’ll survive

Cosmo: but I appreciate it

Cosmo: I’ve seen him get in trouble for his mouth plenty of times on the pitch

Cosmo: but referees aren’t ones to be sweet-talked so…

Ruby: your expensive roses are wasted on them 🥀

Cosmo: That is the real tragedy 💔

Cosmo: I reckon 🍷 could work on your dad though, whaddya think?

Ruby: aren’t we beyond bribes? I thought we were

Cosmo: You don’t have to go up for contract renewals

Cosmo: but I was joking, so don’t tell him he’s on a promise there

Ruby: oh yeah, it’s a joke you being worried you won’t get renewed

Ruby: he doesn’t shut up about you after a few 🍷’s with your dad

Cosmo: Sorry you’ve had to witness/hear that

Cosmo: can’t help my case

Ruby: it wouldn’t be realistic to entertain you or let you entertain me if he wasn’t on board

Cosmo: No?

Ruby: secrecy & sneaking around would be impossible unless we could both drop what we were doing at a moment’s notice, which we can’t

Cosmo: True

Cosmo: Neither of us has the time for that

Ruby: or the anonymity

Cosmo: You aren’t wrong

Ruby: 💖🤩 back at me?

Ruby: you’re being agreeable, above & beyond the Sunday roast standard you set when everyone was listening in

Cosmo: Agreeable from you I can take

Cosmo: I didn’t know any of you guys were going to be there, so if I wasn’t on top form

Cosmo: I’d love to have a second chance to do it better, of course

Cosmo: Somewhere more exciting than family dinner

Cosmo: and no impersonal and basic 🌹s

Ruby: I’d love to skip the club tonight, it stopped being exciting forever ago

Ruby: there’s your chance

Cosmo: Alright

Cosmo: I’ll make something happen and I’ll send you the place and the dress code

Ruby: pastel colours wash me out

Cosmo: What kind of place would be pastels only? 🤔

Ruby: [name drop somewhere boujee that you’ve been probably with your mum and godmother lol]

Ruby: you wasted the ❤️ on the wrong girl 💔

Cosmo: She wasn’t wearing red

Ruby: it was never going to work out

Cosmo: That might be for the best

Ruby: tbd

Ruby: but I’m not feeling like I’ll cry or talk about any of my exes so it’ll be better for you

Cosmo: And for you

Cosmo: not that you’re letting me be impressive with a bar that low but you know

Ruby: you’ll get over or under it if you want to

Cosmo: If I couldn’t rise to the occasion your dad definitely wouldn’t stand for it

Ruby: I won’t either

Cosmo: tbd

Cosmo: I heard

Ruby: another girl has beat me to denying you everything, I have no choice but to switch it up to keep things interesting

Cosmo: Has hard-to-get worked since the days of negging?

Cosmo: You’ve got all the choices, and no need to play any sort of game with me

Cosmo: Let’s have a good time

Ruby: it might have worked for people who want a different reputation than I do

Ruby: that’d wash me out too, the whole projection of intense cold bitch energy

Ruby: a good time is more doable

Cosmo: It wouldn’t get you very far, I understand

Cosmo: We all have to be some type of way to get to where we need to be

Ruby: yeah & talent has to be backed up with 😁✨

Cosmo: A winning personality, of course

Ruby: if I don’t have that both of my parents & coach are going to lose it, definitely

Cosmo: Well, you don’t need to worry about that, from my perspective

Ruby: from my POV neither of us will be worrying until the alarm wakes us early tomorrow & it’ll be too late to stress it by then

Ruby: the good time’ll have already happened

Cosmo: I’ll drink to that

Cosmo: [something that’s between the restaurant moment we just took Savannah to and the normal clubs they would go to, idk what that would look like, like a club that’s a bit sassier than the beyond standard ones footballers and WAGs would hang in]

Cosmo: but I won’t start without you, like

Ruby: not counting the 🍷 if the 🍝 soaked it up

Ruby: but what do you want me to wear? 🧡💛💚💙💜🖤🤍🤎

Cosmo: ❤️ off the table then

Ruby: the bar hasn’t fallen through the floor, I’m not okaying you wearing the outfit you chose for her & me dressing to match it

Cosmo: 😅 I’ve gone home but alright

Cosmo: I want to see what you come up with, actually

Cosmo: I’ll show you I’ve got better than the jumper, don’t worry

Ruby: I’ll do better than a roast with the fam, talk about a low bar

Cosmo: I think you’re probably incapable of looking bad

Ruby: try keeping me up all night & you’ll see

Cosmo: I won’t be the first or the last to show up to practice feeling less than 💯 … are all the other ice skaters perfect 😇s?

Ruby: I’m not giving any details of who isn’t, you’re a date down tonight as is, I’m not getting ditched for someone even more 😈

Cosmo: About how that looks

Cosmo: ‘cos I know

Cosmo: We aren’t going to post anything are we?

Cosmo: I’m not looking to add to the poor girl’s 💔 and I know it’s a dick move to not even wait ‘til tomorrow

Ruby: 📵

Ruby: getting into a fight with your cousin over me is even more Romeo & Juliet than sneaking around behind my dad’s back, we all know how it ended

Ruby: drama in the routine is fine but off the ice it’s not cute

Cosmo: Drama on the pitch depends how you feel about diving

Cosmo: but I appreciate that

Ruby: how I feel about diving depends how much my brother has got to me & I want to get him back for it

Cosmo: 🟥 or 🟨 depending on the day

Ruby: 🟥 usually

Cosmo: I feel that

Cosmo: about my own, usually, not necessarily yours but I can see the how and why there too

Ruby: yours made an impression, not at all good

Cosmo: That’s his speciality

Ruby: 😬 brothers bring the mood down when they’re ours

Cosmo: Neither of them’s invited

Ruby: it’ll make a change not to see mine out

Cosmo: That’s unlucky

Ruby: but you’re on to a winner with the location, congrats

Cosmo: I had a good feeling

Ruby: I’ve got one too

Cosmo: 💖🤩

Ruby: a compliment to last until I get there

Cosmo: tbd 👋

Ruby: ❤️

Cosmo: [so obviously this night is gonna go better than the awkward date, though that’s not hard soz Savannah, but also a step above the standard club moment of every weekend hence we stay out longer than we usually do when we’ve got an early start tomorrow]

Ruby: [and equally as obviously if you found enough to talk about when you were around all your annoying relatives for that roast I’m not worried about you struggling for a convo tonight, you’re both cute and have things in common and there’s clearly a vibe]

Cosmo: [I don’t think anything needs to happen tonight but it’s obvious you like each other ‘cos you could both be bothered to show and do this]

Ruby: [agreed it feels legit to who you both are and your priorities to wanna take things a bit slower than that, like it’s clearly unlike her already to do this when you were literally on a date earlier and staying out later than planned is also something neither of you do a lot so]

Cosmo: [yes, we’re not that kind of boy, not saying you’ve never slept with anyone obvs lmao but we’re not a different gal every weekend energy at all]

Ruby: [likewise neither calling this gal a nun or a slag but I doubt she's been out with that many people cos of a) her busy schedule and b) the lowkey famous dad and brother thing that would make some lads wanna try it on for that reason]

Cosmo: [exactly dr phil, you wanna skip to the AM of it all?]

Ruby: [absolutely boo]

Cosmo: 🟥 or 🟨 for keeping you out past your bedtime then?

Ruby: Are you willing to take credit or am I blaming a messy friend’s man troubles?

Cosmo: That depends

Cosmo: we would have to find a friend we’d mutually not mind throwing under the bus and I’m not sure if my brain is capable rn

Ruby: it wouldn’t be taxing to mine to think up someone believable, if you’re keen to show up to my door with 💐 & fool my dad that it’s the first move you’ve made

Ruby: for rep’s sake

Cosmo: The 💔 is all around

Cosmo: a hangover will have you feeling that way

Cosmo: are YOU keen for me to show up at your door with 💐s, that’s the real question here

Ruby: I’ll start getting hangovers when I’m old, it’s a scare tactic before, not a real thing

Ruby: impressing my dad doesn’t necessarily impress me

Cosmo: 😂

Cosmo: That’s alright, I already have impressed him, so it’s definitely not my intention here

Ruby: let’s hear what your intentions are

Cosmo: Now you’re bragging about how un-hungover you are

Cosmo: How about you let me set up a second date and we can talk about it then?

Ruby: a brag would have a selfie attached, I was reassuring you I’m not suffering mild alcohol poisoning like most of our friends

Ruby: a second date for when?

Cosmo: I’m pleased to hear it

Cosmo: it doesn’t make for a pretty sight

Cosmo: [pisstakey shot of some of the lads dying in the changing room or wherever like ew lol]

Cosmo: Send me your calendar and I’ll see?

Ruby: 😬 lovely [but send him something similar of the girls obvs and then your calendar of course, I’m cackling because what if the only time they can both do is tonight so that looks really extra when you’re both not]

Cosmo: They’d kill us for that 😏

Cosmo: [we so could, lmao okay]

Cosmo: Well, it looks like either we double down and go for tonight or we give it a rain check and see in a couple weeks 🤔

Ruby: tonight works for me but it’s you who’d be doing the work to think of somewhere else with wow factor

Cosmo: Undefeated with two wins sounds a lot better than one

Ruby: yeah & I don’t want to talk about weeks on the bench

Cosmo: Be a bit of a dirty tactic to put the blame on you for not going out with me tonight if I get benched but

Cosmo: If it works I’m not above it

Cosmo: So, what kind of place are you looking to avoid tonight?

Ruby: do we need to avoid anywhere or flash photography? your cousin & the girl they forced you to date can’t stay mad forever

Cosmo: No, we don’t have to

Ruby: 💖🤩

Cosmo: Understood

Cosmo: I’ll get back to you

Ruby: 🚫🍷🥃🍸🍹 can be tonight’s rule if you need a break

Cosmo: I don’t

Cosmo: I just needed to know what you want to do, and now I do and I’m thinking

Ruby: I know you don’t need it to have or be fun, me either hopefully

Cosmo: I think you’re fun

Cosmo: and it’s definitely tragic if you have to rely on something like that, that’s not me

Ruby: it’s nobody I know or would count as worth knowing

Cosmo: Totally

Cosmo: Okay, I’m going on the pitch, send you deets later

Ruby: don’t mess up or I’m going to cancel tonight & I don’t want to so that’ll be us both in bad moods 😘

2 notes · View notes

dvp95 · 5 years

Text

quiet on widow’s peak (6)

pairing: dan howell/phil lester, pj liguori/sophie newton/chris kendall rating: teen & up tags: paranormal investigator, mystery, online friendship, slow burn, strangers to lovers, nonbinary character, trans character, background poly, phil does some buzzfeed unsolved shit and dan is a fan word count: 2.9k (this chapter), 19.7k (total) summary: Phil’s got a list of paranormal experiences a mile long that he likes to share with the world. Abandoned buildings, cemeteries, and ghost stories have always called his name, and a particular fan of his has a really, really good ghost story.

read this chapter on ao3 or here!

Hope my friends and I didn't make things weird for you yesterday. We're heading to the city around noon if you're still up for helping us with the boring part.

noon?? fucking alright i guess i gotta put pants on

lmao yeah, sorry. My parents woke us up at EIGHT like that's a normal time to be awake????

desgostang

What?

ill send u the link later and also no i didnt feel weird yesterday you guys are nice

That's good! And hey I wanted to ask. You were kind of put on the spot with introducing yourself, would you rather we called you Dan or Winnie? I just wanna make sure we aren't making you uncomfortable at all lmao

no its all fine you can call me dan idc and actually its best if you do call me dan when youre in my work lmao

Are you totally sure?

why would i lie abt this. dont be an idiot it isnt a good look on you

haha okay. I’ll see you around noon.

“Christopher is a nice boy,” Phil’s mum is telling him as she helps him with their fancy new coffeemaker. There are so many buttons and Phil is so, so tired. “And Sophie is lovely, such a soft-spoken thing. Why haven’t we met them before, dear?”

“Dunno,” Phil says instead of the truth, which is that he’d had no idea how he was supposed to introduce them. “You have now, though.”

His mum laughs and reaches up to pat his cheek. “True enough. I’m so happy that you’ve got good people around you, Philip. I’ve gotten quite worried about you down there by yourself, you know.”

“I’m not by myself,” says Phil. “I live with, like, thirty people.”

“Bunch of strangers, I’ll bet,” she says, because she knows him. “Aside from those three.”

The thing is, she’s not wrong. Phil’s obviously exaggerating about the number of people under the roof of the creaky Brighton house, but the truth is that he can’t keep track half the time. A lot of the rooms get sublet out randomly, or a significant other will start spending so much time around the place that they might as well pay rent, and Phil really isn’t good with new people. He gets along fine with Holly and Dave, but they’ve been there as long as he has and the closest they’ve ever come to a heart-to-heart was comparing anxiety meds over burned pancakes.

Chris and Sophie were there when Phil moved in, and they’d taken one look at him and decided to just keep shoving into his space until he liked having them there, like they were on a mission to adopt PJ’s sad, ghost-obsessed friend from the internet.

“You might be right,” Phil says, feeling a smile tug at his lips for the first time all morning. He’s already had a coffee - and a half, when PJ declared that not even Kath could make coffee taste good and shoved the rest of his Phil’s way - but he still doesn’t feel fully awake. “I’m only really friends with Chris and Soph because of PJ.”

“PJ is a good friend to you, isn’t he?” his mum hums. That slightly pointed tone doesn’t get to Phil the way it usually does, because he knows that she’s just trying to understand him.

It doesn’t escape Phil’s notice that he’s looking into a mirror whenever he sees his parents watching him carefully, waiting for him to tell them something he hasn’t explicitly said, because he’s been doing the exact same thing to his housemates for nearly two years.

Maybe he’ll tell his parents when he’s got someone serious or even, like, semi-serious. Longer than two dates would be a record at this point. But right now he already feels like he’s been one misstep away from disappointing them, and he doesn’t want to take the gamble that his sexuality will be that misstep.

He’s not up for this conversation, though, isn’t sure he’ll ever be, so he just says, “Yeah, he is.”

Dan is late. They’re so late, actually, that Phil’s wheel of worst case scenarios has been spinning silently and getting faster and faster the more caffeine he chugs. They roll in with flushed cheeks and a jacket that looks too thin, apologies on their shiny lips that Phil doesn’t even hear for a couple of seconds because he’s too busy staring at them.

“No worries,” Sophie says, interrupting their rambling before they lose another half hour to it. “You want something? I’m getting a refill.”

“No, no, let me,” says Dan. They shrug off their jacket and hang it on one of the empty chairs. Phil and his friends have co-opted the largest table in the place so they can spread out with their laptops and notebooks, and it doesn’t escape Phil’s notice that Dan has decided to sit next to him when they’ve got a couple of options. “I get free drinks if Gabe’s in a good mood. Anyone else need a refill?”

“Me,” Chris says, not looking up from his screen. “Not Phil. He’s cut off.”

“Hey,” Phil protests weakly. His heart rate really has picked up since they sat down, so he knows Chris has a point.

Dan grins, their soft cheeks giving way to the dimples that Phil is very quickly growing obsessed with. He just wants to make Dan smile and laugh constantly, to hear them cackle and see all the lines in their round face deepen with happiness.

Right. Phil watched a horror movie with PJ instead of unpacking this fluttering start of a crush last night, and now he’s just got to deal with it for the rest of the day.

As if it’s a compulsion, Dan clears the empty mugs from their table before heading up to the counter. Phil focuses on the EMF readings so he doesn’t get caught up on Dan holding four mugs by the handles with total ease.

PJ has got headphones on and his eyes closed, so he might not even have noticed that Dan is there. He’s been going through Sophie’s footage and his own audio recordings to try and find some anomalies while Chris looks for the weird visual stuff - they’re a great team at that, and it makes Phil feel like he’s not doing enough. Sure, he could find those things on his own, but not as quickly as they can when it’s a team effort, and they’re on a bit of a tight schedule here. Well, his housemates are. They’ve got actual jobs to get back to once the weekend is over.

Allegedly, Sophie is doing research on sigils, but it looks to Phil like she’s just doodling. Not that he really blames her if she is. He’s barely been paying attention to the chart he’s making of spikes in electromagnetism because he’s been so busy watching the door for Dan.

And Dan looks… good. They’re wearing chunky boots and a shirt that falls to their thighs - a dress, maybe, but it looks like a regular black t-shirt that got extended at the hem - with tight white jeans. The only colour on them is the plaid shirt around their waist and the shiny red product on their lips to match it. Phil watches them lean against the counter and grin at the older barista, and he’s so distracted by looking at their profile that he startles when a foot connects with his under the table.

“Stop staring,” Sophie says, quiet and smiling. “He’s going to notice.”

Phil considers correcting her, but then he remembers that he probably doesn’t have to. Dan had said any pronouns, that they didn’t care how they were referred to, so it would definitely be weirder to act like he knows better than Sophie.

He knows he won’t be able to use masculine terms for Dan. Not because they aren’t true, because he’s pretty sure they’re no less accurate than neutral or feminine would be, but because thinking of Dan as a maculine person is only going to allow Phil’s brain to fall into the familiar traps of gender in ways he doesn’t want to allow.

Gay monkey brain doesn’t need any more leeway in finding Dan attractive, that’s for damn sure.

“So, what are we doing?” Dan asks, interrupting Phil’s thoughts, and, wow, four mugs is a lot more impressive when they’re full of hot liquid. Phil marvels at Dan’s ability not to trip and spill it all as they dole out the coffee and teas.

“I’m doing the boring part,” says Phil. He turns his screen so Dan can see the Excel spreadsheet and laughs at the face they make. “Yeah. It's not glamorous, but it's the easiest way to find patterns in the EMF readings. Honestly, most of my job is just staring at things and finding patterns in them. Like, uh, what's that guy? With the butterfly splotches?"

"Worcestershire," Chris suggests.

"Rorschach," Dan corrects him, lips twitching like they aren't sure if they're allowed to laugh in Chris' face or not.

“That’s exactly what I said,” says Chris.

“You know EMF meters don’t have anything to do with ghosts, right?” Dan asks, ignoring Chris completely and leaning a bit closer to Phil to get a better look at his laptop. “I mean, none of this has anything to do with ghosts, really, but you’re more or less just measuring electricity.”

Phil is aware of that. He wonders if Dan thinks he just stumbles into haunted houses with equipment he hasn’t researched and waits to be spooked. He’s too distracted by how close Dan is and how good they smell to work up to proper offense, though. “Yeah,” he says simply. “But don’t you think it’s weird that the place still has electricity to begin with? Who’s paying for that?”

“A Wilkins, I’d imagine.”

“But why? If they’ve forgotten about the property or abandoned it on purpose, surely they wouldn’t still pay the bills.”

“Maybe they don’t handle their own finances,” Dan suggests. “How rich were these assholes?”

“I honestly don’t know,” says Phil. He taps his fingers in an erratic pattern on the edge of his laptop, trying to spark something in his mind.

It’s almost disappointing when Dan pulls away to dig out their own sleek Macbook out of their messenger bag, but Phil is also glad for it. He can think a lot easier when the warm scent of spice and mint isn’t clogging his brain.

Dan slots into the work as easily as if a space was left for them. They’ve got dozens of tabs open already and they start to go through them, cross-referencing magic things with Sophie in quiet tones and digging deeper into the Wilkins family than Phil ever would have thought to. Every so often they tap Phil on the arm and drag him into whatever rabbithole they’ve fallen down, chatting animatedly.

Phil knows, objectively, that Dan is a fan of his and that Dan is weird about research. It’s another thing entirely to watch it happen in real time, to see Dan pull up local census PDFs from the eighties and explain why chaos magic is bullshit in the same breath.

An hour or so goes by like that, all of them working on their own things with minimal words exchanged by everybody but Dan, and then Chris shouts loud enough to make the barista jump. Nobody else is in the coffee shop right now, which is lucky, because Dan’s got a hand over their chest and Sophie has slopped tea down her front. PJ, with his headphones on, simply cracks an eye open.

“What the fuck was that about?” Phil asks, putting his own palm against his chest to feel his heart race. Dan raises their eyebrows and looks at Phil, seemingly distracted from the startling, wordless exclamation.

They don’t get a chance to say whatever they’re thinking, though, because Chris is turning his laptop to the rest of the table and grinning wide like the Cheshire Cat. “I found something.”

Everybody gathers round, PJ getting up to lean over the back of Phil’s chair and Sophie getting so far into Dan’s personal space that Phil is certain they’re uncomfortable with it, and then Chris presses play upside down. It’s part of Sophie’s footage, Phil standing in the dim foyer and looking frustrated. Even without sound, Phil can tell that this is when he was arguing with Sophie about going upstairs. He squints, but he can’t see whatever it is that’s got Chris being so loud.

“What am I looking at?” PJ asks when the short clip ends, and Dan hums an agreement. Chris makes a frustrated noise like they’re being obtuse on purpose and rewinds to the beginning.

"There," Chris says, excited like he hasn't been since they got to Manchester. He taps his finger against the laptop screen. "D'you see it? D'you see the shadow?"

Now that Chris has pointed it out, Phil does see something. He moves his own laptop and notebook out of the way to pull Chris’ closer with a frown. Chris lets him do that, bouncing in his seat a little bit.

“That’s straight up a person,” Phil says slowly, tracing the outline of the shadow with the mouse. It’s behind him, in the entry to the kitchen, and it looks tall. Quite a bit taller than Phil, anyway, if he’s remembering that doorframe correctly. He decides to measure it next time they go so he isn’t going off memory. “I knew we weren’t alone in there. Like. I’m not crazy, that’s a human being.”

“That’s what I thought,” says Chris. “But press play.”

So Phil presses play. He watches the shadow stay perfectly still in the kitchen doorway until, suddenly, it’s not there anymore. He blinks, rewinds, and watches it disappear again.

Phil’s caffeinated brain is firing on all cylinders now. He grins and shoves his sleeves up to his elbows before he starts fiddling with the clip. The lighting gets played with until the shadow is more obvious and then he slows it down to 0.25 times speed to see if the shadow really just vanishes.

He presses play again. This time, with a very slow-motion Phil talking in the foreground, he sees the shadow move. It runs sideways, further into the house.

“What the fuck?” Dan breathes.

“We are not going back there without some serious protection,” PJ says, even firmer on the topic now.

“What, like sigils?” Dan asks, their pretty eyes wide even as they scoff. “You’d be better off with a fucking, like, baseball bat, mate. That doesn’t look like something that wants to be your friend.”

“I’ve got a crowbar in PJ’s trunk,” Phil says, absent-minded as he plays with the clip some more.

“Excuse me? When did you put that in my car?”

“Couple months ago.”

“Huh. How have I not noticed?”

“You’re not the most observant person I’ve ever met,” says Phil. He looks up at Chris, who’s got the same exhilarated look that Phil is sure he’s mirroring. They don’t get evidence like this very often, something so clearly there that it’s even got a skeptic’s mind racing. Phil exports the edited clip and then the original, putting them both into the Cloud and emailing them to himself. “Was this the only time you saw it?”

Chris nods, accepting his laptop back when Phil is done with it. “I’ll look through everything again, now that I know what I’m looking for and all, but I think that’s it.”

“Okay, cool.” Phil looks around at his friends and Dan, beaming. “Something weird is happening. I love it when something weird is happening.”

“I hate it when something weird is happening,” PJ says, which is a blatant lie.

“Well, we can’t go snooping around until it’s darker out, anyhow,” Sophie reminds them.

“Wait, we’re snooping?” Dan asks, their voice going up an entire octave in disbelief. “Like… you just saw that someone is there and probably not happy about people sneaking around, right? Don’t you have enough for a video already?”

“We’re spending the night,” says Phil. “It’s what we do.”

“It’s what you do,” PJ corrects him.

“Okay, yeah, you guys don’t have to come if you don’t want to.”

“No, I’m coming,” says PJ.

As if she can’t hear them bickering, Sophie turns to Dan with a sweet smile, her eyes twinkling with the same excitement in Chris’. They love this, just like Phil does. “What about you, Dan?” she asks. “Are you going to have a ghost sleepover with us?”

“There’s no such thing as ghosts,” Dan says, their eyes still glued to the back of Chris’ laptop like they can see the shadow through it.

“Guess you don’t have anything to be afraid of, then,” says Chris.

“Uh, axe murderers, maybe?”

“We know what we’re doing, Dan,” Phil reassures them. He reaches a hand out to pat at their arm, feeling a bit awkward about it. “But you don’t have to come with us if you’re scared.”

That makes Dan’s gaze shift. Suddenly, those brown eyes are staring right into Phil’s soul, defiant and beautiful and impossible to look away from.

“Who said I was fucking scared?”

#phanfic #phanfiction #dnp fic #words words words #quiet on widow's peak #this chapter is a little short thanks to me prioritizing my mental health BUT i am still happy with it #so i hope you like it too #even if you might think the plot is slow!

28 notes · View notes

nebulous-frog · 5 years

Text

Outlast the Darkness

Summary: From the prompt: a hurt/comfort fic that takes place during spooky week from any year (i’ll leave the nature of the hurt up to you, as long as it doesn’t involve depression or something like assault or abuse)

Phil was with family for a few days, leaving Dan alone at the flat. Of course, this was also right when they decided to film scary videos for Halloween, so the job fell to Dan. Everything was darker, quieter, and spookier without Phil, especially after Dan filmed Outlast, but he was determined to be brave, at least until Phil came back.

Word Count: 4245

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Some Angst

Warnings: Descriptions of fear of a break-in (although no break-in ever takes place)

Author’s Note: Merry Christmas! This fic is totally not Christmas themed at all lol but it's for my Secret Santa Fic Exchange with @phandomficfests, written for @velvetnautilus. Thank you to m'pal @pasteldnp for betaing, you were super helpful! Also, I’m super late posting this to tumblr lmao whoops but here I am now This fic takes place during Spooky Week 2014 and has a couple direct quotes from this video

Link to AO3 Fics Masterlist

“That’s- that’s enough. That’s enough. That’s enough for today,” Dan stuttered through a nervous laugh. It was time to be done with Outlast before he had an actual heart attack. He took a deep breath, then reached over to turn on the light.

He flicked the switch on the lamp but immediately squeezed his eyes shut for a moment.

When you open your eyes, there won’t be a face staring back at you. There’s nothing there.

He took another deep breath and opened his eyes, sighing with relief when the room was empty. He looked over to the door and saw that he left it partially open while filming, and he shuddered at the black emptiness of the hallway beyond it.

There’s nobody there, so you can go over and turn on the hall light and it’ll be fine. Go do that. You’ll feel better.

Dan stood up and walked to the door, opening it more to look outside the gaming room.

“Quick check for axe murderers in my house,” he said in a sing-song voice. He exaggerated his calmness for the camera through jokes, but he really was shaken up by the game. Once he had established that no one was in the hallway, he flicked on the hall light and walked back over to his gaming chair. “No people wearing baseball bats in my hallway at the moment, great! ‘Cause I don’t have any lockers to hide in,” Dan said with a forced chuckle as he sat down.

Not that that helped me in the game. Or would help me in real life, he thought grimly. He ran a hand over his face. Come on, then, pull it together for the last bit here.

He stared down at the keyboard.

“That was extremely stressful and terrifying,” he laughed, “but I liked it. Whether I do it on this channel or in my own time, I think I’m definitely gonna continue playing this game.”

And it was true. He did enjoy playing the game and he had every intention of completing it. Although, maybe not when he was home alone. He wasn’t sure how he’d make it through the next two days without Phil there to keep his imagination under control.

Whenever Dan played a scary game, Phil was there afterwards to calm him down. The adrenaline from the game would leave him exhausted but high-strung, flinching at shadows and unexpected noise. But then Phil would find him and talk to him about anything as a distraction, and slowly Dan would return to reality. He’d be able to confidently walk through their flat in the dark without fear of unknown entities attacking him. Phil’s grounding presence saved him from many long nights and panic attacks. Without him, Dan was in for a difficult few days.

He shook his head to clear it, then gave a big smile to the camera. He launched into the end card spiel, throwing in a joke about how, once he returned, Phil would be able to distract any murderers in their house while Dan escapes.

Dan ended the video, then went through the process of shutting off the equipment and closing out of the computer. He used this as an opportunity to calm his mind, choosing to put all his brain power into pushing a few buttons so it wouldn’t think of terrifying scenarios with axe murderers.

As he clicked the last button to log off the gaming computer, the microphone fell with a clatter.

Dan jumped in surprise, clutching at his chest and turning to look at the source of the noise. When he realized it was only the microphone, he laughed in relief and bent over to pick it up.

To the camera, he said, “That was my microphone falling off the desk, okay. I’m gonna stop, I’m gonna stop.”

He laughed again, then reached out to turn off the camera equipment. His hand was shaking like a leaf. He shook his head at himself and rolled his eyes.

You’re fine, Dan, it was only the microphone. Calm down.

Eventually, he finished putting away all of the camera equipment and shut down the computer. He turned to the door of the office and stood to leave the office.

Time to go downstairs for dinner and then bed. Try not to think too much about the dark hallways you’ll have to pass through to get there. Don’t think about the faces that could jump out at you, or the murderers that could be lurking around corners, or the terrifying giants that could be ready to kill you at any moment. Don’t think about it.

“Oh, god,” he whispered to himself. He took a brave step forward, then another, and another, until he was in the hallway and staring down the stairs.

While the stairs themselves already had a light on, the hallway at the base of the staircase was pitch black. Dan would have to walk down towards an empty abyss and nearly enter it blind before he could turn on the lights in that hallway.

He swallowed around the lump in his throat.

“Okay, Dan, you can do it,” he told himself. “Back to the wall, come on.”

He rotated slightly so his back could press against the wall, then took a cautious step down one of the stairs. It was slow-going because of the awkward angle, but he made it to the light switch for the hallway and immediately flicked it on. Now assured that the hallway was safe, he checked behind him to make sure his back was okay.

“Oh, shit,” he muttered. He had left the light on in the office.

I am not going back up there to fix that. That’d take too long and be too dark. He turned back to the hallway. Phil is gonna kill me for leaving all these lights on. Oh well.

Dan continued down the hallway slowly. Luckily, the door to the lounge was closed, so he didn’t have to worry about it.

Unless there’s someone lurking in there and waiting for me to go to bed so they can jump out and kill me in my sleep, his brain helpfully supplied. And what about the staircase down to the bathroom, huh? That’s still totally dark right there. Someone could be there watching you right now. He gulped but decided to ignore the stairs in favour of running the last few steps to the kitchen.

As soon as the light switch was in reach, he flipped it and dove into the now-bright kitchen, narrowly avoiding banging his head on the glass door.

He breathed a sigh of relief into the empty room.

See, Dan? You’re fine. There’s nobody here trying to kill you.

He walked over to the cupboards and opened a few, checking to see what his options for dinner were.

If you cook something, you’ll be out in the open for longer, his idiot brain whispered. A chill ran up his spine. Maybe then, when you turn around, you’ll see someone through the glass door, waiting for you to come out so they can-

“No, no, no, nopity nope, we are not doing this right now, Dan,” he interrupted his own thoughts. “I’ll make some cereal and eat it in bed and everything will be fine. There are no murderers in the flat,” he said into the cupboard.

He went around the kitchen, picking up a bowl, a spoon, milk, and the box of Crunchy Nut (still full, since he’d only gotten it that day and Phil hadn’t been around to steal it), all the while avoiding looking through the glass door.

Rationally, he knew nobody would be outside the door, but his brain had him feeling just paranoid enough that he knew he’d have to convince himself it’d be okay. For the moment, however, he ignored it so he could get his cereal.

Once he had assembled his cereal, he replaced the milk and cereal box to their rightful spots and closed all the cupboard doors.

Now you have to turn around and leave and go straight to your room. It’ll be easy, just turn around and go. There’s nobody there.

Even as he reassured himself, however, his brain rebelled. It conjured an image of a big burly man standing beyond the glass door, breathing heavily through a grimace and holding a baseball bat in his hand. In Dan’s mind, the man was staring straight at him menacingly, waiting for him to get closer.

Dan felt panic creeping up on him, but he forced it down as best he could. He had to stay level-headed long enough to get to his room and then he’d be safe. But first, he had to turn around.

Just in case something was there, Dan put his bowl of cereal down on the counter so he wouldn’t drop it. He gripped the spoon tighter in his hand as if it could be a life-saving weapon somehow, then forced himself to turn.

Spinning quickly on his heel, he faced the glass kitchen door and saw- absolutely nothing.

He sighed in relief, though his shoulders were still tense.

See, Dan? There’s nothing there. You’re totally fine.

He picked up his cereal and made his way to the door.

Okay, you’re gonna run to your room and close the door. You’ll be fine.

With one last breath, Dan took off running down the hall, refusing to look behind him.

Right as he was about to enter his own bedroom, he changed course and dove through the door on the left, shutting it quickly behind him and pressing his back to it. He flicked on the light and relaxed when he saw that he was alone in the room.

He wasn’t sure why he’d decided to go to Phil’s room. It wasn’t even technically Phil’s room- they shared Dan’s for sleeping and only used Phil’s as a set for filming.

Maybe it was the brighter colour scheme, which always reminded him of Phil; maybe it was the knickknacks littering the room; maybe it was that Phil went in there just often enough that his scent barely lingered in the sheets.

Whatever the case, Dan had chosen Phil’s room and there was no way in hell he was going back into the empty hallway.

He walked over to Phil’s bed, setting his cereal bowl down on the bedside table. He took his phone out of his pocket as he sat down on the bed. There was a message notification on his lock screen.

Message from Phil

Dan felt his heart ache. He missed Phil, especially after his traumatizing filming experience. It hadn’t been that long since Phil left, but he couldn’t help it. Phil was his comfort, always there to distract his overactive imagination on nights like this.

The text notification served as a reminder that Dan was alone to deal with his anxiety and paranoia, but it also made his lips twitch upward slightly. Phil was thinking of him.

Dan swiped open his phone to look at the message.

My Spork <3: hey bear <3

Dan quickly typed out a response.

Me: <3 hi

He bit his lip, trying to decide if he should send more. After a few seconds, he sent another text.

Me: i miss u

Not long later, Phil responded again.

My Spork <3: i miss u 2. how was filming?

Dan ran a hand through his hair, his eyes flicking to the door nervously.

Me: ok. the electric bill might be higher than normal though, sorry

His stomach grumbled, so he set his phone on his knee and reached for his cereal. As he took his first bite, Phil’s reply came in.

My Spork <3: :( r u ok?

No, I’m hiding from the imaginary murderers in your room while eating cereal.

Dan took a deep breath. Don’t tell him that. It’ll worry him too much.

Me: ill be fine. hows the north

Despite the hundreds of miles between them, Dan could feel the weight of Phil’s suspicious concern. He felt a twinge of guilt at making Phil worry anyway, but shrugged it off. Phil would be more worried if Dan told him the truth.

My Spork <3: the north is good. my mum thinks she shouldve tried harder to get u to come with me

At least he’s letting it go.

Me: maybe next time, if we dont have spooky week to worry about

My Spork <3: i wish i could be there with u for that. i know what ur like after scary games. u sure ur ok? we could skype if thatd help

Dan looked around the empty room as he debated whether or not they should Skype. On the one hand, it would definitely ease his anxiety about being alone, at least for a little while. On the other, Phil would see the state he was in and feel guilty about making Dan do Spooky Week alone, which Dan definitely didn’t want. Phil was with his family and he shouldn’t have to deal with Dan being ridiculous.

But I really want to talk to Phil...

Me: im ok, i promise

Me: but we can skype anyway, if ur not busy

Me: but we dont have to

Dan bit his lip after sending the texts in rapid succession. Phil would know there was something up for sure.

My Spork <3: im always free to skype you

A wave of memories of 2009 washed over Dan as he remembered how true that statement was. It filled him with a warm sense of fondness and made his cheeks flush.

He looked around him for his laptop, then remembered he was in Phil’s room.

Oh, shit. It’s in the lounge. I’ll have to go back out in the hall.

He stared warily at the closed door, psyching himself up to leave.

The sooner I get up, the sooner I can come back. Then you’ll be talking to Phil, and Phil will make everything better. Come on. Go get it.

Dan took a deep breath, then launched himself off the bed and wrenched open the bedroom door. He ran down the hall and past the terrifyingly dark staircase until he reached the door to the lounge.

You’ve made it this far, he thought as he panted, back against the wall. Just dart in there and grab it. In preparation, he turned on the torch on his phone.

He took another deep breath and opened the door. The lounge was dark, but he ignored everything in the room except the couch, where he could see the dull reflection of his silver laptop resting on the armrest. He dove for it, made sure he had the charger, then fled the room, slamming the door behind him.

Okay, now get past the creepy-ass staircase and you’ll be fine.

Finally, Dan was sitting on Phil’s bed with his laptop plugged in and open to Skype. Phil was already online, so Dan clicked the “Video Call” button.

Seconds later, Phil’s face came over the screen in grainy, laggy quality.

“Hey, Bear,” he said with a soft smile. He looked like he was sitting on his bed in his childhood bedroom.

Dan’s heart ached as he remembered how often he’d done this with Phil before they lived together. He wasn’t sure how they’d managed it back then.

“Hi,” he replied. He reached over to Phil’s bedside table and grabbed the cereal he’d left there. The cereal was soggy now, but he ignored it. There was absolutely no way he’d be leaving Phil’s room now, so soggy cereal for dinner would have to do.

On Skype, Phil’s eyebrows crinkled. “Are you eating cereal in my room?”

Dan felt himself blush and was glad for the poor quality of the camera.

“Maybe,” he mumbled. It had only been a few seconds and yet Phil already noticed that everything wasn’t as fine as Dan tried to lead him to believe.

Not that that was surprising; Dan’s texts had probably been a dead giveaway, anyway.

“Oh, Bear,” Phil whispered. He looked sad. “That game really freaked you out, didn’t it.” It wasn’t a question.

Dan looked into his cereal bowl and swirled the milk around with his spoon. He shrugged, but stayed silent. He waited for Phil to get upset with him for lying.

But Phil was much too good a boyfriend for that. Instead of calling Dan out on his lies, he changed the subject.

“I miss you,” he began. “Visiting relatives isn’t the same without you. I have no one to hide in the corner with.” His lips quirked up in a small smile.

“I miss you, too,” Dan said. He finished off the cereal and put the empty bowl on the bedside table. “Have you been eating lots of sweets, at least? I’m sure your mum has been feeding you like crazy.”

“Oh, she definitely has. She’s already been making food for me to take home to you, too.”

Dan grinned. He loved Kath. She always made sure to think of him and include him, which he greatly appreciated.

“Your mum is too nice. Tell her I’m excited to eat whatever’s left by the time you get home,” he gently teased Phil.

“Oi, I’m not that bad!” Phil argued, feigning indignation. Softer, he added, “There’ll be some left for you, I promise. It’ll be a good reward for living without me for a few days.”

Dan scoffed and shook his head. “As if your mum’s baking could replace you. My reward for being alone will be cuddles, a film, and shitty pizza.”

Phil chuckled. “Okay, that sounds good.”

They fell into a companionable silence for a few seconds, each imagining how nice it would be to be back in each other’s arms finally.

Dan broke the silence. “I really miss you. It’s too quiet and empty.”

Phil frowned. “I’m sorry, Bear.”

Dan shook his head. “It’s not your fault. I could’ve come with you, but I decided to stay home and play a scary game.” He trailed off for a moment, breaking eye contact and remembering the creepy face of the man with the bat. His finger subconsciously traced over the edges of the square mouse trackpad. He shuddered when he recalled the fear he’d felt. “I almost didn’t call you, actually. I knew you’d feel guilty, but I don’t want you to.”

Phil looked like he wanted to protest, but held himself back. “I’m going to give you some amazing cuddles when I’m home, okay?”

A small smile made its way onto Dan’s face. “Okay. I’m holding you to that, you know.”

“I’d expect nothing less. Cuddles are important,” Phil said seriously.

Dan let out a little giggle and it tapered off into a sigh. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Phil replied. Suddenly, he yawned. “I’m getting tired. I don’t want to hang up, though.”

Guilt shot through Dan as he realized how late it was, and he was quick to reassure Phil. “No, no, that’s okay. You need to sleep. I’ll be fine with all these lights on. I can be brave tonight.”

Phil smiled fondly. “I want to be there so you don’t have to be,” he whispered sadly.

Dan’s heart melted. This whole conversation and situation reminded him so much of that first year, and clearly, Phil was thinking the same thing. He sighed, feeling somewhat nostalgic.

“For the most part, I don’t miss 2009,” he said, pondering. “I miss how carefree we were, that’s for sure, but this long-distance thing really sucks. How did we ever manage it?”

Phil shrugged through a yawn. “Endless Skype calls and nonstop texting? I’m pretty sure we drove our families insane along the way.”

Dan laughed. “Yeah, probably.”

They fell silent again, this time reminiscing about the past.

Or, at least, Dan had been reminiscing. From Phil’s end of the call came a deep snore, snapping Dan out of his reverie. He focused back on his laptop screen and saw Phil with his head tilted so his chin rested on his chest, his eyes closed. Dan chuckled.

“Hey, Phil,” he called softly. “Phil, honey, you have to wake up.”

Phil’s head jolted and his eyes open. “What? I was sleeping, though,” he whined as he regained his bearings.

“You’ll get a stiff neck if you stay like that, not to mention how your eyes will dry out if you don’t take your contacts out,” Dan chided.

Phil blinked, seeming as though he hadn’t considered that. “Oh. Right. I’ll be right back.”

Before Dan could say anything else, Phil stood up and left the frame. Dan adjusted his laptop so it rested on the bed next to him, then got under the covers and laid down. He moved the laptop lid so Phil would still be able to see him.

A few minutes later, Phil returned, this time with glasses. He got into bed and copied Dan’s arrangement, laying down with the laptop next to him.

“Can you stay on the line?” Dan asked tentatively. “I’m going to try to sleep but it’ll be easier if I can kind of hear you.”

Phil nodded. “Of course.” He took off his glasses and put them on his bedside table, then made himself comfortable. “I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you, too,” Dan whispered back. He could feel sleep creeping up on him, and he was grateful that Phil would stay on Skype to keep his mind from imagining other things that might creep up on him. He watched as Phil’s eyes slipped closed, then let his own fall shut. Through the crappy laptop speakers, he could just barely make out the sound of Phil’s breathing, and then the sound of soft snores that grounded him in reality. He finally fell asleep feeling much more relaxed than he’d been all night, thanks to Phil.

~~~~~~~~~~

The next two days passed by in a blur of excessive lighting and loneliness. Dan kept most of the lights on all the time as if the light alone would be enough to fend off any murderers that may pop in for a visit, especially after editing Spooky Week videos. Playing through the games had been bad enough, but going back through them to pick out clips for the actual videos was much worse. He had to relive the fear from each video multiple times to make sure what he got was just right.

But Phil was finally returning, and that meant cuddles and pizza and safe.

All day, Dan anticipated Phil’s return. He tidied the flat, piled blankets on the sofa, and set aside Phil’s favourite pyjamas for him to change into as soon as possible. Dan himself was wearing joggers and Phil’s York hoodie, which he normally only wore when sick as a reassuring comfort. He felt like he deserved it after his traumatizing few days alone.

Around 5pm, he heard the door open. He jumped up from where he’d been sitting idly on the sofa and ran down all the stairs.

“Phiw!” he yelled happily.

Phil looked up from where he’d been trying to manage his keys, coat, and suitcase in time for Dan to slam into him in a bear hug. He stumbled back a step, his back hitting the door as Dan buried his face in his neck.

He chuckled and put his arms around Dan, one hand going to cradle his head and the other wrapping around his waist. He pressed a soft kiss to Dan’s hair.

“Hi, Bear,” he whispered.

Dan’s arms tightened around Phil.

“I love you,” he said. He kissed Phil’s neck chastely, then settled himself in Phil’s arms with a content sigh.

“I love you, too.”

Phil gently began to sway them side to side and pet Dan’s hair with one hand.

A few minutes later, he spoke up.

“As much as I love this, we should move it to the sofa. It’ll probably be more comfortable,” he mumbled, though he made no move to break the hug.

Dan sighed. “Yeah, and I have everything set up, too. Your pyjamas are on the bed for you.”

Neither of them moved.

“We have to let go if we want to move to the lounge,” Phil pointed out.

Dan groaned. “I know, but it’s hard. The lounge is so far away.” Despite his words, he finally lifted his head. He gave Phil a soft kiss, then stepped back and out of his arms entirely. “I’ll meet you in the lounge, okay?”

Phil nodded, then grabbed his suitcase and trudged up the stairs.

Not long later, they were curled up on the sofa, limbs tangling together. Buffy was on the TV, but they weren’t paying attention to it. Dan had his nose tucked into Phil’s chest and his hands clutched at Phil’s soft T-shirt.

“You’ll scare off the murderers and monsters, right?” he mumbled, glancing up at Phil’s face.

A small smile graced Phil’s lips, and he nodded. “Of course,” he whispered.

Dan smiled lazily in response, blinking slowly. He yawned. “Then I think I’ll just take a little nap. You’re cosy.”

One of Phil’s hands came up from Dan’s hips and rested gently on his face. His thumb tenderly caressed Dan’s cheek, and Dan leaned into the touch with a hum. His eyes slipped closed and he snuggled farther into Phil’s chest with a sigh. Within minutes, he was asleep, feeling safer and calmer than he had in all the time Phil was gone.

#phanfic #fic exchange #hurt/comfort #fluff #angst #established relationship

14 notes · View notes

gorgeousdan · 7 years

Text

notdanhowell

summary: Dan has a guilty pleasure: phan blogs. It’s a mixture of conceited arrogance and morbid curiosity, really. And really, it’s a mixture of these two things that lead to him catfishing members of his phandom and becoming a headcanon blog. After all, what harm can one headcanon do? word count: 1323/20,000 (why’s it so short?) warnings (this chapter): mentions of sex (dan writes a dirty hc)

LAST CHAPTER | NEXT CHAPTER

Three a.m rolls around again and Dan finds himself in notdanhowell’s inbox looking for something to write. It’s like a monster has been unlocked in him since he wrote that stupid kissing headcanon, like a bad upgrade in a video game. All he can think about is kissing Phil, touching Phil, doing frankly inappropriate things to someone who’s supposed to be his best friend.

But it’s fine if he writes about it, okay? Then it’s not a fantasy, it’s fanservice. He doesn’t have a problem. It’s fine.

Dan scrolls through a few of the prompts. There are some that make him laugh, like him and Phil using glitter lube in a public washroom, a few that scare him, like one where he’s Phil’s slave and he’s locked up and that might actually be illegal?

superpaperclip said:

hc about what d & p are like in bed? love your blog, dani!

Meg stares him down in their profile photo. Dan lets out a resound sigh.

Why not?

notdanhowell said:

dan’s probably loud. the neighbors probably bang on the walls to get him to shut up. dan’s favorite position is riding phil, where he gets to be in charge while still getting fucked, because lbr we all know that dan’s a whore for cock. he also likes when phil’s on top of him so that he can scratch up phil’s back, leave red marks that mark phil as his.

phil probably has more control than dan does in bed. he’s not loud, but he enjoys it anyway. the noises phil makes are probably deep and go right to dan’s dick. his favorite position is either reverse cowgirl, so he can watch dan’s ass as it moves because dan’s ass is noice, or missionary, because phil’s probably a romantic little shit who likes to stare into dan’s eyes.

Dan tags the ask appropriately and presses post. He can’t help but think about it, Phil hovering over him, kissing down his neck, telling him what a good boy he’s being.

Dan’s door squeaks open. Dan jumps, slams his laptop lid shut. Phil’s standing in the doorway with his duvet wrapped around his body. He stands there for a minute. “I couldn’t sleep,” he says, and his voice sounds tired. “Can I come sleep in here?”

Dan puts his laptop to the side. He doesn’t say anything, but lifts his duvet in invitation. Phil gets under, puts his own over the two of them.

“What’s up with the lack of sleep, Mr. Lester?” Dan asks. He scoots over a bit so that Phil will have room to sleep next to him.

Phil sighs. His eyes are closed, but Dan can tell he’s awake. Years of being someone’s best friend means you know these kinds of things about them. “I was worried about you,” he says.

Now it’s Dan’s turn to sigh. Despite the conversation they had on the tube, he knew Phil wasn’t going to drop it. It just wasn’t like his best friend. “I told you that you don’t have to be.”

“I know.” Phil opens his eyes and turns so that he can lean his head against his hand. He uses his free hand to grab Dan’s, laces their fingers together. “I just don’t like the idea of you being lost in your head.”

Dan pulls Phil to his chest at that. Phil tangles their legs together, and despite the fact that they’re both tall, lanky guys, it’s nice. Phil sighs a little bit and Dan can tell that he thinks so too.

They fall asleep twinned together like this, and Dan can’t help but feel a little bit bad.

Dan wakes up the next morning to his phone ringing. It somehow doesn’t wake Phil up, the heavy sleeper he is, but Dan groans at the loud ringing. He turns onto his side to look who it is. His mum. Great. This should be fun.

Don’t get him wrong, Dan loves his mum. It’s just that every time she calls, Dan can expect the same “got a partner, yet?” talk. Honestly, it’s kind of aggravating. It’s not as if he doesn’t want to have a partner, it’s just that getting one would require going outside and talking to people and meeting people. Dan much prefers staying inside with Phil and watching anime or the Great British Bakeoff.

Christ, he’s got it bad, hasn’t he?

Dan answers it with a soft, “yeah, hello?” so as not to wake his best friend.

“Dan!” calls his mum. Dan can’t help but smile at her voice. He truly does love her. “Did I wake you?”

Dan runs a hand through his hair. He grabs Phil’s phone so he can check the time. Half past nine. “Yeah,” he answers truthfully. “But that’s probably for the best. Millennials like me will sleep until one in the afternoon.”

Dan’s mother laughs. “Don’t I kno-”

She’s cut off by a groan from behind Dan as Phil blinks awake. “Dan?” he says, and his voice is so thick with sleep that Dan knows his mother won’t be able to miss it. “Who’s that?”

“My mum,” Dan mouths. Phil nods his understanding and motions that he’s going to the kitchen. As soon as Phil leaves, Dan’s mother is talking his ear off.

“That was Phil, right?” she asks. “Why was he in your bedroom?”

Dan sighs. “He just fell asleep in here last night, mum.”

“Are you two dating?”

“No. We’re just friends.”

“Do you want to be more?”

Dan takes a deep breath at that. Does he want to be more than friends with Phil? Of course he does. He wants to be Phil’s boyfriend and kiss him and have lazy sex with him in candlelight. Well, that sounds a little dangerous but. You know.

But he can’t tell his mother any of this, because she wouldn’t understand what it’s like to be an angsty twenty something with an online personality where he writes fanfiction where he’s fucking his best friend. “I gotta go, mum. Phil’s made breakfast.”

Dan’s mum sighs, and he can tell this isn’t the last he’s going to hear of it. “This isn’t the last we’re going to talk about this,” she confirms. “Love you lots. Be safe.”

“I will. Love you too. Bye.”

Dan hangs up the phone and throws it onto his bed. He stretches out his back, which is knotted from sleeping with Phil on top of him all night.

Not that you’re complaining, Dan’s brain supplies unhelpfully. Dan resists the urge to slap himself.

Dan walks into the kitchen, where Phil is currently pouring a second bowl of cereal. Dan takes the first, bites into it. “Morning,” he greets his best friend.

“Morning,” Phil replies. He puts the cereal and the milk back, leaves the cabinet open. Dan pushes it closed with a fond eyeroll. As soon as he does, Phil’s looking over at him. “How gay does your mum think we are for each other?” he asks.

Dan laughs. “Pretty god damn gay,” he answers. “Just like all of our friends, basically.”

Phil scoffs. He puts his bowl down on their counter and gives Dan a look that means it’s time to be serious.

Dan sips his tea and braces himself.

“It’s stupid, isn’t it?” Phil asks. At Dan’s raised eyebrow, he elaborates. “I mean, it’s stupid that everyone thinks we’re dating. Because we’re not. Just because we’re secure in our friendship and sexuality and like to cuddle doesn’t mean we’re anything other than friends.”

Dan swallows his tea. “Right?” He says. “Like, if we wanted to date,” he swallows. “Like, we just would.”

“Right?” Phil asks.

“Right,” Dan confirms.

The two of them stand in a silence that’s vaguely awkward for a moment. Then, Phil says, “I’ve got an episode of the Great British Bakeoff on DVR.”

Dan accepts the peace offering. “Cool,” he says. “Let’s go.”

Dan ignores the texts from his mother.

AUTHOR’S NOTE:

Thank you to all the people who signed up to be a part of notdanhowell! It was actually so many people that I don’t know if I’ll manage to get everyone (I’m sorry!) but I’ll definitely give everyone a thanks in the final author’s note.

I actually really like this chapter for no reason. Hope you do too.

Please reblog to spread the word about my blog! Also, a thanks to @superpaperclip for letting me use their URL and sully their good name lmao. I hope I did you justice, Meg.

Thanks y’all

-Seb

#notdanhowell #phanfic #phan fic #fanfic #fic #personal #dansmemeteam #phanfriends #dsliceandangelbeannetwork

122 notes · View notes

dvp95 · 5 years

Text

quiet on widow’s peak (3)

pairing: dan howell/phil lester, pj liguori/sophie newton/chris kendall rating: teen & up tags: paranormal investigator, youtuber phil lester, dan howell is not a youtuber, online friendship, slow burn, strangers to lovers, nonbinary character, trans character, background poly, phil does some buzzfeed unsolved shit and dan is a fan word count: 3.1k (this chapter), 9.5k (total) summary: Phil’s got a list of paranormal experiences a mile long that he likes to share with the world. Abandoned buildings, cemeteries, and ghost stories have always called his name, and a particular fan of his has a really, really good ghost story.

read this chapter on ao3 or here!

Interviews used to be Phil's least favourite part of this job. The research was always captivating, the filming was always fun, the editing was always challenging, but talking? To people? About things? Absolutely not.

He still doesn't love doing it, but he's long past the point of begging Martyn or Ian to pretend to be him on the phone.

The curtains in Phil's room are open for once, letting natural light in so he doesn't look as dark on the Skype screen. His eyes keep drifting to himself, distracting him as he tries to fix his hair or laments not getting out of his pyjamas. This is his fourth interview of the day, and he's starting to hate the process with a renewed fervour.

"Okay, thank you," he says, clicking out of the screen record window. "Can I message you here if I have any further questions, or would you prefer this to be your final statement?"

"Oh, um," the girl says, her eyes round with some kind of emotion that Phil can't be bothered to parse. "No, no, that's... that's all I saw. I don't have anything else. But you can still... message me, if you like."

Ah. Phil makes a face that he hopes reads as apologetic and not panicked. "No, I - sorry. Gay. Just interested in your ghost."

"Oh!" she says again, looking more puzzled than Phil thinks she has any right to after a forty minute conversation where he mostly just asked her clarifying questions that she kept dodging. She tucks some of her long hair behind her ear and shakes her head. "Sorry, that's just - you haven't said that online."

Phil isn't very good at knowing when people are lying to him, but now he's definitely suspicious of the half-assed testimony he'd gotten from this girl. He sighs. "Okay, you know who I am, then?"

"I mean, I looked you up when you messaged me about a video and all," she says. "Wanted to know if you were a creep or, like, legit."

Okay, that's fair enough. Phil supposes that if he were a girl in uni and a stranger asked to video chat, he'd also do a little digging first. He still doesn't quite believe her story, though - most of it matches what she'd written on Facebook, word for word, and she didn't go into detail on anything she claimed happened.

"Right, of course," says Phil, feeling awkward and exposed.

Her eyes are wide and blue and she can see into his room, into his life, and she's giving him this look like she thinks she knows something about him. He hates this feeling.

"That a secret, then?" she asks.

"No," Phil says. "It's just not relevant to my job. I don't have a lot of ghouls asking me out."

She doesn't laugh. Phil is getting more and more uncomfortable by the second, and he's wondering if it's worth it to hang up on a potential lead - no matter how dubious her claims - when she says, "Well, alright. I won't tell anyone anyway."

"Thanks," Phil says automatically. He doesn't particularly care if she does or not, but he does want this call to end as soon as possible. "And thanks for your time. Message me if you think of anything else you forgot to mention about the Wilkins place or if you know of someone who's seen something."

Before she can even respond, Phil hits end on the call and groans, resting his forehead on his thumbs for a moment.

Unsurprisingly, this is giving him a migraine. It doesn't take much to make the twinge of a headache turn to insistent throbbing, because Phil's body hates him and overreacts to everything.

Phil takes a couple of deep breaths before he comes out of hiding. He attaches the final screen recording to the email he's already got open and ready to send to Martyn. After a moment's thought, he CCs PJ and Sophie in and adds, Nobody sounds credible except the second person to me, so... it's not looking good lol, before hitting send.

He takes off his glasses and rubs at his eyes for a moment. Interviews are still draining for him, especially when they don't go as planned, and Phil's starting to get the impression that there's nothing to even find at the Wilkins place.

But. Phil pauses, considers his options. He hasn't interviewed everyone, has he.

Before he can talk himself out of it, Phil shoves his glasses unceremoniously back onto his face and opens Tumblr. Winnie hasn't said anything to him so far today, so Phil feels only a little like he's bothering them when he shoots off a quick, Hey! I just finished interviewing the sources you gave me and most of them aren't very promising. Would you consider letting me ask you some questions to round out the video?

me?????, Winnie replies almost immediately. i didnt even see anything?? like im happy to answer questions but idk how much use ill b in an INTERVIEW

I know! And you don't have to lmao so don't feel pressured or anything but you know so much more about the place than they do. Everyone claimed that they didn't know other people were having paranormal experiences.

oh bullshit, Winnie says. Phil is surprised into a huff of laughter.

There's a part of Phil, fuelled by anxiety and uncertainty, that worries Winnie is just pulling an elaborate joke on him. That part of him feels a little more at ease every time he actually talks to Winnie. They just seem... genuine. And maybe Martyn would disagree, would blame Phil's desperation to see the best in people, but there's a reason Phil doesn't tell Martyn everything.

Before Phil can agree with Winnie's colourful derision, his laptop beeps again. i look like an ogre rn but i can voice chat if you rly think itll help

It would!!, Phil assures them. The tender spot behind his eyes twinges again, serving as a reminder. Can I call in like an hour? I've got a headache from the screen lol

sure i really have nothing else going on today

So it's later in the day, late afternoon light still streaking through Phil's window, when Phil sits back down at his computer and adds the Skype username Winnie gave him. His head still hurts a bit, but it isn't all-consuming now that he's had another coffee and some painkillers. The padded headphones feel good to put over his ears, blocking out most of the typical noises from such a full house and a busy street, and Phil just sits in the blissful quiet for a moment before he sends a voice call request.

It gets picked up almost immediately, and Phil presses a smile into his palm before he says, "Hi! Can you hear me alright?"

There's a beat. Phil waits, in case Skype is lagging as usual, but he's opening his mouth to repeat himself by the time he gets a response.

"Yeah," says Winnie. "I can hear you."

Phil isn't really proud of himself for being surprised by Winnie's voice. It's just. He knows his viewer demographics, okay, and he has a rough grasp on Tumblr demographics, and the name - alright. It isn't his proudest moment, is his point, because he's expecting a much higher pitch for absolutely no good reason.

In addition to that, his brain automatically tries to classify Winnie's voice as very obviously masculine, and Phil has to push back against that.

"I can hear you, too," Phil says cheerfully, not allowing his anxieties to spill over into the conversation.

"That's good, probably," Winnie says. There's another beat of silence, and then a huff that might be laughter or a sigh comes through Phil's headphones. "Sorry, I - I'm not trying to be fucking weird, this is just surreal."

"Is it?" Phil hums. "But I haven't even asked you about ghosts yet."

A snort - definitely laughter, this time - follows, and Phil is so glad that he's able to put Winnie at ease even if his brain is betraying him. "That's true. I guess it's gotta get weirder from here."

"That's kind of, like, the subtitle of my whole channel," says Phil. After a moment, he frowns. "Subtitle? No. What's the thing, on the poster -"

"Tagline," says Winnie. They sound so amused and warm and, okay, they've got a nice voice. That's not gendered. Phil can think that. "You're thinking of a tagline, you buffoon."

"Tagline," Phil echoes gratefully.

"Don't you," Winnie starts, then stops abruptly. They don't finish the sentence, but Phil can kind of guess what they were going to say. There's the sound of some rustling, like Winnie is getting comfortable, before they change tacks. "Again, I didn't see any of this alleged ghostly activity with my own eyes, but I know the hot goss."

Phil opens the recording program out of habit, nodding even though Winnie can't see him. "That's still really useful at this point," he says encouragingly. He clicks a couple of buttons. "And, yes, I do have an English degree. Thank you for not asking."

Winnie laughs, the sound of it filling Phil's headphones and making it feel like they're in the room with him. It's warm, like everything else about their voice, and absolutely contagious.

"I didn't want you to think I was, like, a big stalker," Winnie says, and Phil can hear the grin in their voice.

"Eh, I know you watch my videos," says Phil. "So I figure you know some stuff about me. You probably know that I'm going to ask this, too, but - is it okay if I record our conversation? I don't need to include it in the video if you don't want me to, but it's still useful for me if I don't so I can, like, actually remember the things you told me."

"Yeah, sure," Winnie agrees easily. They hesitate, for a moment, and Phil waits for whatever the caveat will be. "Uh, can I still swear?"

The question surprises Phil into laughing. "Yeah, you're fine. I can bleep them out."

"Then I am all for it. Ask me the ghost questions, ghost man."

Phil presses record and glances down at his notebook, where he's scrawled some disjointed questions alongside his usual doodling. "Uh, okay. Yes. I am totally a professional."

"If you say so, mate," says Winnie.

"Hush. Okay." Phil finally gets his brain back on track and taps his pen against a question near the end of his list. "So, Winnie, you did all this research into the Wilkins place on your own downtime, but you mentioned that you've been hearing murmurs about it for a while, right?"

"Not that long, actually, I've only been hearing about it since term started," Winnie says, and Phil is struck by how comfortable they suddenly are now that there's a guideline. Or, maybe, now that there's a non-Phil audience. "Which I thought was pretty weird, since I'd been there a couple times since I moved here, and it's a spooky fucking place but nothing to write home about."

That's more or less exactly how Phil feels about the situation, except that he doesn't remember the Wilkins place to be scary at all. Maybe it's gotten worse in the years since, or maybe he's just got a higher threshold for empty, decrepit homes than Winnie does. Either way, he's not sure if he should be relieved or suspicious that their thoughts on it mirror his own so well. He starts a spiral in the corner of his page as he considers the answer.

"So, you never got the impression that it was haunted before?"

"I - can I be perfectly honest?" Winnie asks, and then doesn't wait for a response. "I don't get the impression that it's haunted now. I dunno if people are just making shit up or if they're doing too many drugs, but we all know that ghosts don't actually exist."

Phil snorts. He does have a fairly large number of skeptics who watch his videos to argue in the comments about logical explanations for his findings or to just enjoy watching him fail so much, but he hadn't really expected that from someone who sent him a sourced essay on the topic of ghosts.

He's recording right now, so he's not about to give away the fact that, yeah, he kind of does agree with Winnie on this one. Instead, he keeps his tone neutral and says, "You don't believe in ghosts."

"I don't believe in most things that can't be explained by science," Winnie says, so matter-of-fact that Phil has to smile.

"I don't really believe in science," Phil says, mild.

A beat. "Excuse me?"

"I said I don't believe in science," Phil repeats, doubling down on the joke so he can hear that incredulous pitch of Winnie's nice voice again. "I mean, isn't it all just as made-up as anything else? People just tell us stuff exists and we have to believe them?"

"We believe them," Winnie says slowly, "because it's a fact."

"How do I know that?" Phil asks. He knows how off track he's already gotten, and he decides to cut this part out before he sends the file to Martyn or his friends.

"Because you can. See it. With your eyes." The genuine bewilderment in Winnie's voice is very funny. "Like. What the fuck, Phil. If someone drops an apple and it hits the ground and they're like, 'oh that's gravity', how are you supposed to say, 'uh, no it ain't'?"

Phil leans back in his chair a bit, his spiral turning into an apple. "Because, what if that's just what the apple wanted to do? It's not like we know any of this for sure, Winnie."

"You're fucking with me," Winnie says, but they don't sound very certain.

"I am," Phil admits happily. "Do you remember the first incident that kicked off the Wilkins place rumours?"

"You," Winnie says, and then cackles. They lean away from their mic as they do, but the sound of it still makes Phil feel some secondhand giddiness. He wonders if their laugh has a volume limit, or if it's just going to keep getting louder the funnier Phil is. He is so tempted to put that to the test. "Fuck. You little fucker."

Phil hides his own giggle in the palm of his hand and clears his throat, trying to get back into the professional mindset he'd forced himself to be in for the four earlier interviews.

"Do you need me to repeat the question?" Phil asks. He can't resist teasing, just a bit.

"No, fuck off," Winnie chuckles. They take a deep breath and let it out on a hum, low and thoughtful. "So, there was this shindig during fresher's, which I obviously didn't go to because I'm not a fresher and I'm too old to go to shindigs, but people were talking about how the house was making weird noises. A girl I know - I linked you to her Reddit post - said she saw someone just standing outside the window watching them, but, like, is that really a supernatural occurrence in Rusholme?"

"It's not. And she hit on me as well, so I'm not sure her judgement is trustworthy."

"Sounds like her. Sorry. Anyway, nobody really thought 'ghosts' as much as they thought 'rats in the walls and a pervert on the street', but then - this one didn't get spoken about online. I don't even know how valid it is."

"Word of mouth is how most ghost stories get passed," says Phil. "I'm not going to hold you to citations on rumours."

Winnie huffs a laugh. It's soft, quiet, and Phil almost wishes he could say something ridiculous to make them cackle again. Unfortunately, he has a job to do.

"Fair enough. Well, some idiots spent the night there to see if anything weird would happen," Winnie says, and Phil feels a bit attacked, "and three separate dudes had sleep paralysis."

Phil hums and jots some messy notes down. "In the same night?"

"At the same time," Winnie corrects him. "The other idiots were trying to wake them up for a long time, apparently. They're convinced that the guys who fell asleep were just pulling a prank on them, and maybe they were, but that's when the ball really got rolling."

Out of everything Phil has heard today, this is the most compelling story so far. Maybe that's a good indicator of the Manchester students being full of it - maybe there truly is nothing to find in the Wilkins place - but it piques Phil's interest anyway.

"For someone who only believes in cold, hard science, you're good at telling ghost stories," Phil says.

"Thanks," Winnie says, sounding pleased with themselves. "Learned from the best."

Phil is suddenly very, very glad that this isn't a video call, because he can't stop himself from smiling like an idiot. "Oh, is that what they're calling me?"

Another cackle. Phil doesn't remember the last time he made someone laugh so much without tripping over his own clown feet.

"I never said I was talking about you."

"Uh huh."

"Oh, shut up," says Winnie, and Phil can still hear the laughter in their voice. "Don't you have a bunch of questions to ask or something?"

Phil does. He has a whole list of questions that he should be following. He chews on his pen and looks at the doodle-covered list of things he's meant to ask Winnie. His head still hurts - maybe the extra caffeine didn't help after all - and all he really wants to do is take a nap.

"Yeah," Phil says, reluctant. "I've just got, like, a migraine. Can I call you back another time? This was a really great start."

"Oh, yeah, sure," says Winnie. They've dropped their voice down to something soft, like they're worried that they'll make Phil's headache worse.

"I'm actually going up to check the place out this weekend." Phil isn't sure what makes him say that. He meets up with sources in person, sometimes, but usually only if they've seen something with their own eyes. He just feels comfortable talking to Winnie, far more than he'd felt talking to the other students he'd interviewed today.

Phil doesn't actually extend the invitation, and Winnie either doesn't pick up the hint or doesn't care to.

"That'll be good," they say, still soft. "Get some rest, Phil, you can call me back when your brain stops trying to drill a hole through your temple."

After Phil says goodbye and hangs up, he sits at his desk for a long moment. It feels too quiet, all of a sudden, his padded headphones blocking out all the ambient noise around him. It's good for his head, but Phil is still weirdly disappointed.

#phan #phanfiction #phanfic #dnp fic #words words words #quiet on widow's peak

32 notes · View notes

kae-karo · 6 years

Text

dan and phil tag

oh god @lilacskylester hi b you tagged me in this literally ages ago i’m just a mess lately lmao but! bc i know i’ve seen some people asking some things mentioned here so enjoy! i’ll put everything below the cut

What made you subscribe to Phil? Dan? they’re just fun, i mean i’ve talked endlessly about their dynamic and why i love them (why we love dan, why we love phil) and i don’t think it was any single thing that made me sub to them both, just....all the things

How or when did you discover Phil? Dan? i found dan first back in july of 2017 bc i saw a pic/gif of dnp on my dash (and i’ve tried desperately to locate the exact one but i Cannot find it, i think it was from a liveshow maybe?) and i’d been well into thomas sanders at the time so i was like ‘cool more youtubers’ so i watched dan’s 5 drunk people vid (i think i literally just typed danisnotonfire or dan howell into the yt search and that was the first one that came up) and i liked it? so i subbed? i was a dannie for a while (like a week lmao) before i figured out phil was in a bunch of stuff too, binged and subbed to the gaming channel next, then did the same with phil’s channel a bit later

Does Phil have a particular mannerism you find endearing? Dan? phil hmm i think his tendency to be touchy is adorable? like

as for dan, i love him being a dramatic boye

Favorite Dan Video: hands down trying to live my truth (x) it’s just so honest and open and still so well-edited and like. it reminded me of his liveshows which i adore

Favorite Phil Video: i love the honesty of why i changed my emo hair (x) it’s just really refreshing and open, which we haven’t gotten as much of from phil until recently

Favorite Gaming Video: some days i’m just like ‘literally every vid they put out is better than the last’ but i think i’ve mentioned this before (x) but my all-time fave, if i had to pic one, would probs be the yasuhati singing challenge it just gets me every time (x)

Favorite Dan Photo:

Favorite Phil Photo: (it’s not technically a photo but it counts)

Favorite Dan and Phil Photo:

Favorite Dan Instagram Story:

tied with

youtube

Favorite Phil Instagram Story:

youtube

tied with the failed selfie (x) which it’s being rude and not letting me add so have a pic

Favorite Dan Tweet: i wonder how biology can explain the physical pain you feel in your chest when all you want to do is be with someone D:

Favorite Phil Tweet: ahappyphil

Favorite Dan Live (ie-Live Show, Live Stream, Radio 1) Moment:

youtube

tied with

youtube

Favorite Phil Live (ie-Live Show, Live Stream, Radio 1) Moment:

youtube

Favorite Dan and Phil Live (ie-Live Show, Live Shows, Radio 1) Moment:

Favorite Fan Artist: oof @dyxnamic-art or @incaseyouart although i follow plenty of lovely artists!

Favorite Fanfiction Author: @waveydnp @jilliancares @leblonde @danfanciesphil are always consistent faves, but there are so so so many incredible authors out there!!

Favorite Fanfiction Story: i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again until my lungs stop working, but i adore a match and a fuse by @waveydnp (x)

Who should Dan collaborate with next? Phil? Together? i would love to see dan collab with someone to talk more abt mental health or depression or gender roles or literally anything that he talks abt in his liveshows that he doesn’t necessarily make vids abt. i’d love to see phil collab with pj again??? i want smth dark and strange and a little reminiscent of early ap on pj’s channel then smth light and fun and quirky on phil’s. for them both, i want a dnp collab with martyn and cornelia cough truth bombs cough

What should Dan’s next merch include? Phil? Together? @ dan we were promised asymmetrical tops or wide-neck stuff i want it all? i think dan has an incredible mind for fashion and i’d love to see what he would create if he stopped thinking of it as merch. from phil i am here for the pastel, i think i’d like to see him do something with denim? denim jackets? from them both, i honestly don’t care all that much, but i prefer clothes to like. kitschy stuff. i saw a post floating around abt dnp making pajama pants and i would be here for it???

What song best describes Dan? love myself by blake mcgrath (x) “i don’t wanna be perfect, just tryna be honest”

What song best describes Phil? rip i’d have to say i lived by onerepublic (x) it’s been ingrained into my brain at this point (x)

What song best describes their relationship? hah well funny enough we’ve been curating an entire phan playlist (x) (also feel free to send ur suggestions!) but if i had to pick like. a single song. it’d be say you won’t let go by james arthur (x)

What should their next baking video be? for some reason ‘a pie’ came to mind like idk any pie or maybe them trying to replicate mince pie recipes or smth would be funny. either that or maybe smth complex? idk i’m not well into baking so idk what all would be interesting to watch. i’ve also suggested and had suggested to me a baking vid with kath, which i would be so into

And to finish, If you could tell them one thing:

@ dan: you are appreciated, and we’re so incredibly proud of you for working on finding yourself and trying to be who you are. you deserve happiness, don’t ever tell yourself you don’t

@ phil: you are so incredibly respected and intelligent and one of the most creative minds out there, don’t ever sell yourself short or feel like you have to tone yourself down

@ dnp: the world is a better place for having you both in it

and ofc if any of y’all have been around long enough to remember when i actually did ask games, i don’t tag people but! if you see this and want to do it yourself, consider this me tagging you!

#dnp #dan and phil #phan #dip and pip #dan and phil tag #dnp gifs #dnp insta stories #my faves #hope y'all enjoy #kt

63 notes · View notes

gorgeousdan · 7 years

Text

notdanhowell

summary: Dan has a guilty pleasure: phan blogs. It’s a mixture of conceited arrogance and morbid curiosity, really. And really, it’s a mixture of these two things that lead to him catfishing members of his phandom and becoming a headcanon blog. After all, what harm can one headcanon do? word count: 2,134/20,000 warnings (this chapter): recreational drinking, kissing, light fantasy

LAST CHAPTER | NEXT CHAPTER

A couple of weeks pass where nothing noteworthy happens. Dan doesn’t have a big metal breakdown, comes to accept that his life now involves writing headcanons about himself and his best friend. They’re all platonic, domestic things, though, and nothing that their viewers couldn’t work out by watching enough of their videos. So it’s innocent.

Still, Dan tries his hardest to make sure Phil doesn’t find out.

So nothing really noteworthy happens for a couple of weeks. They’re at a YouTube party, and everyone has abandoned their cameras in favor of drinks from the bar. Dan lost Phil some time ago into the crowd. He’s drunk, he’s sure everyone is. He’s sitting at the bar with a drink that’s probably a bad idea in his hands when he spots Phil. He’s lost in the crowd, grinding to some kind of song with Tyler. Dan can tell his best friend’s having fun, but Tyler can get a little sexual while drunk so he figures it’s his best friend duty to save Phil.

Dan takes two drinks from the bar and makes his way through the bar. “Mind if I steal Phil from you?” he shouts to Tyler over the music.

Tyler smiles. “Go ahead!” he shouts back before disappearing into the crowd. Dan turns his attention back to Phil and holds up a drink. “Shot!” he yells over the music. Phil takes it and clinks his glass against Dan’s. The two of them tip the hard liquor down their throats. It stings, but it’s welcome.

“Are you having a nice time?” Phil shouts. He catches a hand around Dan’s waist so that they can bounce to the music together. It’s a little less than a thumping noise in their ears, but it’s good. The atmosphere is good, the party is good, Dan feels good.

Dan chuckles because he’s a little bit drunk. “Actually, yes,” he shouts back. “I’m not going antisocial, for once.”

Phil’s face is flushed red and Dan can tell that he’s more than a little drunk when he gives Dan a full smile back and yells, “actually, it’s asocial.” He pauses. “Because antisocial would be,” he hiccups. “Something different.”

“Mh,” Dan laughs. “Very smart of you, Phil Lester.”

The two of them don’t say anything for a while, just dance with each other until Louise puts a hand on Dan’s shoulder and yells to Phil, “Mind if I steal him?” Dan’s fairly certain Phil would agree to anything in this state so he just nods with a loopy smile.

Louise pulls Dan away, wraps an arm loosely over his shoulders. “So,” she says, and her smile is cocky but Dan’s a bit too drunk to figure out why yet. “Are you two dating yet?”

Dan throws her a lopsided grin. “Us two who?” he asks.

Louise tilts her head in Phil’s direction. Dan’s best friend is currently in the midst of a social circle that would give Dan anxiety but in which Phil prospers. “You and Phil,” Louise fills in.

Dan feels his heart get caught in his throat. “Me and Phil?” he stutters. Louise raises an eyebrow at him. “No, we’re just friends,” he’s quick to correct. He forces a laugh that sounds fake even to him. “God, you’re worse than even the shippers.”

Louise looks like she’s going to say something, but then there are fingers on his shoulders as Phil forces him back. “Payback!” he yells over the music as he tips a shot down Dan’s throat. Dan’s blood feels warmed as Phil mutters, “mwahahaha,” into his ear, but he’s not sure it’s the alcohol.

At three in the morning Dan finds himself going through notdanhowell’s ask box again. He can’t sleep, he’s too buzzed off of the alcohol, and though it’s mainly worn off by now, it’s still buzzing pleasantly through his veins. Phil had fallen asleep almost as soon as they’d gotten to their flat a little over two hours ago, so it’s just him.

His blog has a fair amount of headcanon requests. Usually, if he decides to write one, he goes right for the most platonic and domestic prompt he can find. However, he can’t help but let his eyes catch on one that stands out in his ask box.

justcallmegracie said:

Could I have a headcanon about how Dan and Phil kiss? I really like your writing! :)

The smiley face stares back at him as if it’s an enemy. Usually, he would scroll right past this prompt. Writing fanfiction about his best friend was one thing, but writing fanfiction about the two of them kissing was a line that he wasn’t sure he was willing to cross just yet. But he’s buzzed and his brain goes without his permission.

Phil has a bit of a chapstick addiction, Dan bets his lips would be so soft. He thinks Phil would probably kiss gently, probably do something sappy like grab Dan’s face or put his hands around his waist, pull him in gently. Dan thinks kissing Phil would be dizzying, probably addicting. And then he pauses because he’s considering kissing his best friend. He’s considering enjoying it.

Dan shuts his laptop so quickly that he’s almost afraid that the crash of his computer lid can be heard the next room over. His heart is pounding in his chest, he can feel his pulse in his throat. Did he actually just do that? He feels like he might pass out. What kind of person was he becoming?

One that considers kissing his best friend for Internet-based speculative fanfiction, apparently.

Dan very slowly reopens his laptop. The damned smile face is still smiling back at him, along with the stupid headcanon prompt.

He really shouldn’t.

notdanhowell said:

dan kisses hard and fast, like he’ll never get another chance to again. he pulls the other person in, wraps his arms around their neck, let their hands run down their chest and under their shirts. he’s a very sexual kisser, but like what would you expect from him, let’s be real.

phil, on the other hand, would be a very slow and soft kisser. he’s a nerd so he’d probably want to let it grow organically, want it to be romantic. when dan gets him going, though, he’s all whimpers and needy kissers and soft mutters of “more.” kissing phil is dizzying, intoxicating, it’s-

Something Dan wants to do at that moment. He gasps at the realization, quickly backspaces and then presses post. He worries his lip between his teeth and when he realizes he’s imagining it’s Phil he reckons he’s more than a little drunk.

He closes his laptop and when he lays down, he almost immediately falls asleep.

They’re kissing.

Dan’s not entirely sure how they got here, but Phil’s got Dan’s shirt balled up in his fist and he’s got his other around Dan’s neck. Dan’s got both hands on Phil’s hips, has pulled his flatmate in as close as they can get. It’s good and addictive and Dan doesn’t think he’s ever been more addicted to anything ever.

Dan pulls away from the kiss when he realizes he absolutely cannot breathe, and then Phil’s lips are attached to his neck. Dan feels dizzy. Everything feels so intense. He presses his fingers a little harder into Phil’s hips like he can’t possibly believe that he’s real, that he’s here.

And then Phil speaks. “Is that good, baby boy?” he says, and, god, the intonation of his voice and it’s so deep and it goes right to places that Dan needs to focus on grandma not to think about. “Wouldn’t it feel better if you were awake?”

Dan pauses. “Huh?” he asks, because that’s the most logical thing he can think of.

Phil gives him a dangerous smirk. “Wake up, Dan.”

“Dan!”

Dan jolts awake, sits up with a sharp gasp. Phil’s standing next to him, for some reason fully dressed and looking rather exasperated. “Oh my god, you are such a heavy sleeper.” He grabs Dan’s sheets from under him. “You slept through your alarm, we’re late for a meeting.”

“Shit!” Dan swears. And then, for good measure, “shit, shit shit.”

He doesn’t have time to dwell on his dream as he gets dressed more quickly than he’s sure is humanly possible. Dan’s ready to go within two minutes flat and they’re out of the door and into a taxi in five.

Once they’re in the taxi, Phil looks over at Dan. “Oh my god,” he says. “That was more stressful than trying to get you to the airport, bloody hell.”

Phil takes a deep breath and Dan’s fairly sure his best friend’s going to have an aneurysm. Dan scoffs. “Please, I knew what I was doing.” He grabs his phone from his back pocket and refreshes his Twitter notifications. He doesn’t see the name of the first person, but he can see they’ve linked him to a fanfiction they’ve written. The comment under, though, is what catches his eye.

Arijana @yellowtrash_

lmao don’t link dan to fanfics that’s highkey inappropriate

Dan snorts a laugh at that one. Jesus, if only Arijana knew what kind of hole he’s dug himself into. Phil gives him a weird look, but Dan thinks he’s still probably too stressed to ask Dan about it.

They get to their meeting and thankfully no one’s that pissed off at them. Phil’s brother gives them a kind of pissed off look and Dan’s pretty sure that they’ll be getting a firm talking to from Martyn about being timely for things, but he’s not all that serious, anyway. It’s one of the reason they had hired him in the first place.

Phil empties out his nerdy backpack and hands Dan a notepad and a pen. The meeting isn’t anything too important, just technical stuff. When they had first hired people to build their brand, they had made it very clear that they wanted to come to every meeting, even if they weren’t expressly needed. This is one of those times.

Dan starts doodling on his paper, half involved in talks about financial spending and audience interaction and the monetization of their videos. The other half of his brain trails off into thoughts, falls back into his dream.

That hadn’t been the first time he’d had a sex dream, of course, he too had once been a teenage boy. However, it was the first time he’d had any type of dream about Phil that was anything other than strictly platonic. And, he kind of hated himself for it, but it was kind of nice? He could imagine kissing Phil, actively wanted to feel his best friend’s lips on his own.

“Dan,” Phil says, breaks Dan out of his thoughts. Dan looks around the meeting and realizes that everyone’s staring at him and, oops, that’s vaguely embarrassing. “Marisa wanted to know how you felt about that?”

“Erm,” Dan glances between the people in the meeting, who look more perplexed than anything, and Phil, who looks a mixture of genuinely concerned and annoyed. “I think that’s good, yeah.”

Dan takes a sigh of relief as everyone goes back to discussing whatever they had been talking about previous. He manages a sneaky glance at Phil and the realization hits him like a ton of bricks.

He has a crush on his best friend.

They’re on the tube later when Phil looks over at Dan. “Right,” he says, and his voice is low enough that no one else can hear it, but loud enough to be audible over the sounds of the city. “What’s been up with you, lately?”

Dan knows exactly what he means, but somehow he feels like playing stupid will be beneficial so he asks, “what do you mean?”

“You know what I mean,” Phil replies. Damn their best friend psychic link. He sighs, and his voice drops as he leans in closer to Dan. “It’s fine if you don’t want to talk about it,” he starts, and then he glances around. Dan guesses he’s probably watching for fangirls that tend to get pictures when they stand too close together, “that’s fine. But you don’t have to get lost in your head. And-” he pauses, probably is looking for the right way to word this, “-and I don’t want you to do anything that will hurt yourself. You’re my best friend, Dan.”

Dan’s lips twitch in a soft smile and he nods. “I know,” he says. “It’s nothing bad, it’s,” and for a half-second, he considers telling Phil. He tells his best friend everything, after all. But then he doesn’t. “I’ll tell you one day, okay?”

Phil sighs. “Alright,” he says. He stands back up and digs in his pocket for his phone.

They don’t talk the rest of the way home.

AUTHOR’S NOTE:

sup mates.

i had the busiest week ever and fell super behind on my nano project but i’m back and it’s spring break and i intend to bang out a few thousand words to finally fucking catch up.

this chapter features @justcallmegracie and a twitter user called Arijana! thank you for your sacrifice for some dan angst.

if you’d like to be involved in notdanhowell, click here. PLS DO ESPECIALLY IF YOU WRITE SMUT AND WOULD BE WILLING TO HAVE ME QUOTE YOUR SMUT!

Reblog to spread the word about my blog, thank you!

-seb

#notdanhowell #phanfic #phan fic #fanfic #fic #personal #dansmemeteam #phanfriends #dsliceandangelbeannetwork

168 notes · View notes