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maehemthemisfit · 1 year

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MUTUALS

This is a LOT and probably half of it doesn't make any sense and looks like gibberish but yk what thats fine. Sorry I couldn't fit everyone!

@clovers-garden-co - my first ever moot, my one and only, bae, love of my life, my beloved, and the person who helped me make this blog so BIG SHOUT OUT to them!! ALSO CHECK OUT THEY'RE BLOG THEY DESERVE SO MUCH LOVE 💕💖💘

@fitzkn - my dawg, my guy, my fam, he's canonically a cat and part of the menace society. If you ever see me rb a convo with him, 9 times outta 10 it's gonna be something... idek how to explain it but you might laugh, you might cry, you might log out and rethink your life on this app. Conversations can range from genshin to a lawn mower don't ask me cause I have no words. He's also a talented writer an artists but will never admit it. If you're a fan of angst and genshin, I recommend digging through his blog and finding a fic called butter knife... I was in tears. HIS OTHER WORKS ARE CHEF KISS TOO MWAH

@some-stale-bread - we don't interact much but they're one of the OGs who welcomed me when I first started my blog. They're really cool and they're a good artist so check them out some time!

@senjusonlygirlfriend - we go way back, though we didn't interact much in those early moments. They're an amazing writer and friend and I love chatting with them <33

@path-of-yaksha - we also been moots for a while but I got hella confused bc you changed your url. They're a pretty chill system even though we don't interact much

@y-umiko - fell in love with their blog aesthetic <3 wish we interacted more. They like genshin and TR so it's a yes for me

@mansplain-manipulate-malewife - I don't know how this happened, but it did and I don't regret it. I feel like im falling through portals from rick and morty whenever I open their blog. It's a nice change of scenery. Hii Alex, hope you're doing well

@official-megumin - The best wizard in tumblr so powerful I had to follow. IDK WHAT CHECKMARKS MEAN AND WHY IS THERE MORE THAN ONE??? EXPLAIN??? She's cool, though I rarely see them when im active

@oddshroom - MY GURL, MY G, MY SHROOM- MUSHROOM? HAMVKTIRLOE. ANOTHER ONE PART OF MENACE SOCIETY. They're an awesome person, really sweet, amazing writer, we also speak in code 🦞 but you'll never know what we're saying. They gang fr doe 💅🏾✨

@dorothy-rainbird - WE DONT INTERACT ANYMORE *sobs* or have we ever? I see you in my notifs a lot though so you're part of the misfit gang. RESPECTT. Wish I seen you on my dash more tho :')

@vellichxrr6782 - HUGGING YOU HUGGING YOU HUGGING YOU. You're really sweet and I wish we talked more <33 I wish you the best my friend

@cross-crye - ANOTHER AMAZING WRITER HELLO??? They bouta put me on twst fr im this 🤏🏾close into falling down the simp rabbit hole. HELLO SETH I ALSO WISH U THE BEST

@omori-1 - daily reminder that I need to finish watching omori... I PROMISE I WILL AJUFKRI. VIRGO GANG. TALENTED CREATOR GANG. IF I COULD EAT THEIR BLOG I WOULD. Put it inna air fryer and drizzle some sauce on afterwards yum. Another one part of menace society. LOVE YA CHAI, YOU DESERVE THE WORLD AND THEN SOME

@xiao6ao - My love. My life. My will to write. MY LOVELY EDITOR. MWAH MWAH I LOVE YOU. She's my life support for real and also deserves the world and good fortune and just Nbhvgtdikmk This world shall know pain if anything happens to her. AMAZING WRITER YET ANOTHER ONE WHO DOESNT ADMIT IT. Grammarly 2.0. Always come in clutch. Menace society CEO. AHH I LOVE YOU PLEASE TAKE CARE

@atskas - MY FAM. TALENTED AUTHORS ALERT. TIMEZONES SUCK FR BUT I STILL LOVE THEM. Another one locked in, in the menace society, rip their sleep schedule. HI ARII ILY- HIARIILY... That actually looked like one word- GIRL I WISH YOU THE BEST MWAH

@lunartcmpest - it's always the aesthetic blogs that melts my heart. TALENT WRITER ALERT BEEP BEEP BEEP. GO CHECK OUT THEIR BLOG RN OR IM SNATCHING YOUR ANKLES. Wish we interacted more but it's all good. She's pretty cool tho. SHOUT OUTS TO YOU KAIRI, WISH YOU WELL

@alhara - AUTOCORRECT BE DAMNED. HELLO HARA. SHOUT OUT TO ANOTHER UNDERRATTED WRITER. Wish you the best

@albed0kreideprinz - They haven't been active in a min and I hope they're okay, but here's an amazing rp blog for all those interested. They're amazing and really sweet and I hope the world treats them well <3

@araranas - aka @primojade aka TALENETED WRITER aka AMAZING PERSON aka MNJNJENKI I LOVE YOU. TIMEZONES BE DAMNED

@ventisweetheart - IF ONLY I COULD HUG SOMEONE THRU THE INTERNET! You're so sweet and I'm glad we're moots and I always look forward to our interactions

@micheya - I dont know why and dont ask me, but if I could squish you like a gummy bear I would... IT MIGHT BE THE AETHER PFP IDK. We don't interact much but <333

@1eaf-me-alone - This year, I think you should turn a new 1eaf... g-get it BECAUSE MUYGITKR,ICRLT. Forgive me, I had to. PFF S,MUTFR THEY'RE REALLY COOL CHECK THEM OUT. HI HELLO HRU. I love our interactions please dont block me for my Cyno jokes, I'll 1eaf you alone if you- AUMSUFKRDE IM SORRY I CANT HELP IT!!

@scaranya - the fact that I had to basically type your full name out because scaranation is so big on tumblr... N E WAYS, RECENT MOOT HERE. Love to see your comments <3 Please stay safe and well!

@qingxin-dream - ENVIOUS OF YOUR WANDERER KEYCHAIN GRRR GRRR SUNYUFKRIKRCF. Another great writer here, please check them out!

@sweet-almonds - COMFORT WRITER BC ANGST BREAKS MY HEART. SHE'S AWESOME AND SWEET AND I ADORE YOUR BLOG

@enassbraid - Yall with these url changes. I HAVE BAD MEMORY OKAY! She's lovely okay and deserves the moon and back

@wanderersbell - WWEEEE WOOO WEEE WOOO TALENT WRITER ALERT, YES OFFICER? RIGHT THERE -> YOU'RE LITERALLY SO AMAZING AND FUN TO TALK WITH IM SO GLAD WE CROSSED PATHS EEEE PLEASE I FALL IN LOVE WITH YOUR WRITING EVERYDAY I WISH U THE BEST

I KNOW IM MISSING A FEW AND IF I CAN I'LL ADD THEM LATER BUT MY HANDS ARE GETTING TIRED AND SORRY IF SOME OF THE THINGS IVE SAID WAS REPETTITIVE I TRIED MY BEST

@cynotical - RECENTLY BECAME MOOTS BUT IVE BEEN A FAN FOR AWHILE ✨✨✨ Another talented writer please check them out as well as their other blog!!! THEY'RE AWESOME AND SUCH A LOVELY PERSON TOO

@sonder-paradise - idk how but their writing manages to break me down and put me back together again every time like— UGHHH I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE. Talent writer alert x20. Should have 2 novels and an ongoing series already because wth

#moots 💖#mutuals <3 #mutual list #lovely moots 💕

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slutnali · 11 months

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From my understanding the people on twitter were more upset with her response to biblegirl, who tweeted something along the lines of “the sooner we accept that most adults do cocaine the better” (not the exact wording, she deleted it now cause the response was overwhelmingly negative, but the sentiment was normalizing cocaine use bc it’s prevelant) and Denali responded “tea”. To me that’s a lot more 🤔what do u mean by that🤔 than anything she said on the podcast.

This is long so I'm adding a read more out of curtesy and also because we are talking about drugs [not very descriptive but still]

I remember seeing that earlier while I was out but don't remember it word for word, wish I did tho

But from what I remember, I thought there was some truth to it. Many people do it, it's not just rampant in the lgbt+ community but everywhere else. Does it make it okay? Absolutely not but from what I took from it is that there's just so much shaming for it and I think harm reduction should be discussed. That's not to say that you should glorify it and I don't think they are, however its such a delicate & complicated topic that people are quick to jump at each others throats defending their stance, etc.. With Nali replying 'teaaa' I think also it has to do with the fandom's reaction to it as well.. like, it always gets weird?

I remember when s13 had been announced and people did their digging and found out about her mugshot etc.. the fandoms reaction gave me an ick because people were very much 'omg how scandalous teeheee 🤭" gossiping and theorizing it... and then again when she'd made a joke about her mugshot on the GITMS segment and then people were actually thirsting over it on twt.. like it was weird imo.. and yeah, she was open about it and to some extent you could argue "she made it our business" but I think this'll probably be the last time she does share about it and I don't think she owes us any more stuff about it if she doesn't want to. That's just me though.

Could the tweet have been worded better? Yeah, but again, the tweet from Biblegirl was deleted and I can't really go in depth. But tbh I don't want to go further into depth or back and forth after this ask and another i have, because this blog is mainly for reading [and occasionally writing] drag race fic and thirsting over my faves.

There def is a discussion to be had when it comes to people who have used it and people entirely against it, and there's many points to be shared on both sides. I've seen some of it while I was scrolling twt a while ago bc I follow a bunch of dr girls [obvs] and local queens.

As for Denali, if you no longer want to support her that's fine and your right. If you need/want to separate yourself from that, do it and if you're a follower or mutual of mine that wants to unfollow me there's no hard feelings. If you do wanna keep following me you can black list 'denali foxx' and 'denali' so you wont see posts with her tag. I cant speak for everyone else who may not tag but I can for my blog because I always use them and tag accordingly.

Drug use and talk happens and it's not a cancelable offense, in my opinion at least. There are many many queens who openly talk about substance use but I rarely even see anyone bring it up: Willow and a bunch of s14 girls doing shrooms, Camden talking about how blackout she was while touring last year and not knowing how she got safe to her hotel room, Sasha C mimes sniffing coke or smoking on stage, all the open stoners, etc.. when it comes to this and other topics people are very pick and choose when it comes to their faves so idk..

but again, this is all my opinion and ramble and its okay if we have a difference.

#answered

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italoniponic · 1 year

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AAA CONGRATS ON 1K FOLLOWERS MY LOVELY!! you've grown so so much these past couple of months, i am so proud of what you have accomplished on this site! your work is always a joy to read and i am so lucky to have such a talented individual like yourself as a mutual and friend <3

how about a character bingo with yulia's thoughts on floyd? really any interaction with floyd would be interesting lol, so i'm kinda curious on how yulia would interact with the leech twin~

I had to redo this one bc the first time my chrome shut down out of nowhere and I didn't save anything 💀

PANDOOO THANK YOU SO MUCH <333

The event we’re talking about is this one, celebrating 1k followers~ Everything is explained there but basically you can ask my opinions on character or ask Yulia’s opinions on twst characters as well. I guess nobody noticed the first time and my dear Pando here is my first ask but just letting you all know.

Then again, thank you, dear <3 lots of success for you too!!

[I decided to make a bingo for Yulia's opinions as well just to summarize things and bc it was fun lol]

First things first: Floyd’s nickname for Yulia, “Namazu-chan” (catfish). Yep, a good way to start.

Floyd associates Yulia with a catfish bc the first thing he noticed when she entered the Mostro Lounge in ch3 for the first time was her sideburns (or side whiskers, if you will). Yulia also tends to hide it with side strands of hair. Floyd’s mind immediately went to a catfish’s little whiskers. Incidentally, it’s cat-related and goes with Yulia’s usual motif personality-wise.

Still in ch3, when Yulia was sleeping in Savanaclaw, she woke up 3am upon realizing that (in her country) calling someone a “catfish-head” is saying they’re stupid… so that stupid sticky eel just accidentally called her a idiot! [The Wrath of Namazu-chan!!]

Yulia doesn't know what to think about Floyd. He wasn’t one of her favorite characters when she started to play twst but she doesn't hate him. She would like to be his friend? Nope. Yulia is always looking at him like “why are you the way you are?” almost all the time… but she can be sympathetic when she feels like it too.

They fight a lot in the sense that when Yulia finds herself in need of Floyd’s help, she’s going to find a way to argue her way into his brain and make him do something. She dealt with some troublesome tall guys in school once, there’s nothing new here (Yulia calls him “Electric Pole/Street Lamp” back). She can get mad and brave enough to hit him (no serious damage tho) and Floyd finds that amusing and funny. Probably because it reminds him of Riddle and Epel when they’re mad.

Floyd likes to annoy his little “Namazu-chan” for her reactions. He’s detached enough to mess with Yulia more than he should sometimes or if it requires him to pass through her, why worry about it? (example in ch3) Yulia doesn't take it to her heart, she already expects it.

Though, they can be allies when Floyd catches Yulia in the hallway and asks her to burn down Jade’s monthly mushroom stock because he’s sick of cooking it on Mostro Lounge. Yulia, as fellow shroom-hater, completely understands. In exchange, Floyd tells one or two secrets about Azul and they’re even~

In conclusion: Yulia gives the experience of being around Floyd a simple 6/10. Meanwhile Floyd is just happy that there's another shortie for him to mess with!

#twisted wonderland #floyd leech #twst oc #twst yulia #bingo ask cherry & yulia #1k followers event #twst oc headcanons #cherry's mumbling about twst #first ask of the event... since december lol #well things are a bit calmer now so #maybe things will workout better

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chocolate-failure · 5 months

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Man, shit would be so much more comfortable if I didn't have to have a strong series of thoughts and emotions about any one given experience 😕 extremely ghetto. So I'll try to be concise but I feel kinda horrible and the more I think about it the more reasons I find to feel bad so maybe I should stop thinking about it but I can't and I hate myself for not being able to let go.

I went to a concert. I had a few friends who came to visit expressly for this event and I hosted it at my parents'. Cool, so the weekend before I did shrooms with my bff and while it was nice I, of course, had a lot of mfkn thoughts about it. A lot of self hatred and negative criticalness... Idk I don't like myself and while that shouldn't come as a surprise I didn't realize the extent to which I obssess over shit that doesn't fucking matter. But hanging out with this friend made me feel like hanging out with my other friends would be a cakewalk promptly forgetting that ✨this✨ friend is both intimately understanding of my personality and also a friend who exercises an astounding amount of reciprocity. These friends aren't quite the same, well one is but the other two ate just varying degrees unhelpful which just stresses me out. I gained 6lbs over this, what, 2½ day stent?

So let me attempt to set the stage for this endeavor because I feel like there is an impossible amount of context to lay out but also this could definitely be understood without it.

I'm into kpop, over the years I've made friends due to our mutual love of kpop. Some of these friends are pretty chill while others are not so much while yet more are a bit too chill. The friends I've invited into my home for this weekend are as follows ((may be subject to change cuz I'm coming up with these names on the fly) as a matter of fact I'm really not in the mood to come up with names and trying to think of them is just holding up the story. I'll just call them 5, 6, and 7.

5 is probably the person I know the most and like the most, which is always a feat because the more I know someone the less I tend to like them. They are very insightful, thoughtful, and kind. You can tell they're an introvert but in many ways have been beaten into submission by life and toxic relationships. 5 is overall a great person but has quite a few neuroses that very much blind them from seeing their inherent worth and how valuable they are to the people who's lives they enrich. Coincidentally they are also legally blind which has hampered them living a fulfilling and independent life not only because of the disability but because of their family being less than supportive and fostering some wicked codependency.

6, I don't know so well but all that I've seen so far I'm not impressed with. She is older than me but seems to have far less of a grip on adulthood than I had as a kid. I think the reason this is is because she is a taker. I don't necessarily think she's lazy but she wants to always do the minimum, cut the most corners but receive the maximum. To me that is the definition of lazy weather you're working or not if you expect to get more than what you put in you're abusing the system in some way. Either you're taking from someone else or you're not giving your fair share which is tantamount to taking from someone else. She's aware that what she's doing is underhanded and taking advantage of a relationship but she rather have what she wants over upholding any semblance of integrity. I have people in my family who are just like her. They're the type of people to get invited to a potluck be asked to bring a dish and they arrive with paper plates or something they bought from dollar tree. They're only happy with a deal if they feel like they're ahead of you in some way and will make any given process a living hell by never shutting up about how put out they're feeling. That being said, I don't like her. I thought initially I disliked her attitude cuz just hearing her voice pissed me tf off but I think it's just her. She just doesn't give much to the relationship I have with her and I'd be better off not knowing her.

7 is new to the group. Well new to the people who have hung out irl. I've hung out with her one time before and enjoyed myself but she wasn't staying at my house. She's definitely an extravert and doesn't so much collect introverts as she attracts them. She has a very inviting and boisterous personality without being too overbearing, pushy, or loud. She's nice to be around for events but I think day to day I'm not a fan. In my home we are very giving and extremely hospitable but we also expect guests to have some fucking decorum. Like we're not going to ask you to clean the toilets or some shit but if someone is making you a meal you should participate in the preparation whether it's reading the recipe or gathering ingredients or helping to clean. After all I'm housing you on my own dime so that you won't have to pay for a hotel. I'm preparing a recipe you found online because I'm a good cook and you'd like for me to do it for you. I bought the ingredients and got all the shit ready and asked for help cooking as I needed to finish up and get in the bath because the stress of this event is causing my autoimmune disease to flare up. I'm not going to just drop everything and not do it cuz I'm not a child but I asked for help and received none. It very much felt like my childhood home was being treated like a resort rather than idk my fucking house. It's kinda shitty to act like you're on vacation at someone's house when that person is also trying to a nice time but can't because you've decided you're fun is more important than their physical health. Like could you not still have fun and also have helped so that I could treat my fucking disease??? She and 6 talked, watched vids, and otherwise made themselves unavailable until it was time to eat. 6 would later say she felt like she'd get in the way. That is one thing about 7 that it better than 6, she at least knows how to hold a conversation without complaining in every other sentence so she's a good deal more palatable even though the outcome was the same.

That's one thing I definitely inherited from my parents that's a bit of a double edged sword, being kind and generous is all well and good until you run into people who are either looking to take advantage of you or don't understand that they are, 6 being the former and 7 the later.

Safe to say with just those circumstances in place this weekend was going to be a drain. Nevermind the concert we attended and litany of emotional baggage and mental traumas tied up in the experience of self expression, self disclosure and fandom. This was overall an uncomfortable and exhausting experience.

If you've been here for any period of time you'll know that I'm rather feminine looking both in physical features and presentation. While I feel like my literary voice isn't necessarily all that feminine I hold no delusions that I don't look like an afab person though I suppose that's not entirely true because a non-negligible number of people have assumed I'm a transwoman. And while I'm not always thrilled with the fact it certainly is not lost to me that to many I am rather okay to look at. Maybe not pretty in the conventional sense but Tumblr has never been a place to be conventional and even still I do possess many of the features commonly thought of as pretty. I don't say this to be concieted or self important but to outline an experience that is common for me and known to those who find themselves reading this. I am not unattractive but something that may be lost to those who frequent this blog is how tall I actually am. I am tall for an afab person and almost short for an amab person, probably p close to the average international height for males. I'm 5'8 (173cm) and that's never been a big deal to me, like at all. I've always kind of enjoyed my height and would actually lament wanting to be taller. I would've been happy to be 5'10 but this day was the first in a very long time where I wished only to be small.

In kpop the average listed height is probably 5'10 though that is most certainly a lie. I've always been a rather saunch supporter of shorter men, I think a part of me felt us to be kindred spirits, growing up as a tall girl I thought that short men were both genuinely attractive in a way I find hard to articulate but also just generally strong to exist in a world where their worth is heavily weighted on an attribute they have 0 control over.

Honestly I've always loved short men and tall women for their fortitude but their also just fucking beautiful. I never really considered myself a man or a woman more like some kind of weird gremlin creature pretending to be a person and perhaps I had grown too comfortable in thinking I was a passable human being because holy hell did I let the gremlin come out. And maybe it's just a product of neurodivergence but the way I acted caused me so much distress I'd rather avoid having it happen again than try immersing myself in the experience again. I'm trying not to be dramatic but I feel so goddamn horrible about myself atm this isn't an exaggeration. Did I have a bad time? No. Did I have a good one? Also no. I've always enjoyed music but I think I may hate myself more than I love music and that is a sobering realization to come to.

It started with the fansign. I didn't know there was going to be one until it started and I was sharing air with these beautiful strangers that I know so much and absolutely nothing about. It's a spiralling dichotomy that I don't have a hard time reconciling myself with until I'm in the same room with these people. And I can't be a fan, there's no room for it in between racked breaths and racing thoughts. I'm just a fucking gobo trying so desperately not to give away the fact that I am in fact subhuman scum perpetuating an elaborate fraud, for what? To feel what it feels to be a girl? To enjoy the spoils of fandom? To meet my heroes? I don't even know these people and I'm expected to know what to say to them? And they're expected to tell me I'm pretty and then what? What's that suppose to do? Make me feel like I matter? To them?? What's the fucking point of any of this? And I'm surrounded by these excited screeching girls who are over the moon that he looks at her, of all people, held her hand, said she was so beautiful. What tf is this??? Is this what people do? Is this what joy looks like? I don't think joy comes in a form I'm equipped to consume and if that's what it looks like I don't want it.

I was just felt ridiculous, all dolled up in the corset I spent the better part of a month working to fit into because of course I need to lose weight and it's been the only thing I can think about for the past 10 months (10 years if I'm being honest) but apparently this was enough to strengthen my resolve. Idk, It just rings hollow to me. But maybe it's because I'm hollow. I'd like to think of myself as the thoughtful one out of my friends but maybe I'm just the cynical one. All these insights and disclosures seem to be at the expense of my own joy and I can't seem to wrap my head around what exactly is the point of all of this if it makes me feel even more horrible.

And not so much horrible as I feel utterly alien. As beautiful as I'm told I am the eyes and mind I was born with weren't designed to consume reality. I wish I could be a delulu stan. I wish I was afforded the grace of being so in love with myself that I think the world is too. That I could ever think I was anything but a lumbering oafish loser standing next to this dude I thought was unspeakably attractive or an overstimulated oddball for running through the hitouch line because I'm literally freaking tf out and want it to be over as soon as possible. I can't help but look at the snapshots from the concert and cringe. It's like looking at a tryptophobia trigger, I can't stop despite the immense discomfort it elicits. A form of self flagelltion for disobeying the dogma of an institution I was never meant to be a part of. And the kicker is I don't even want to fucking be here. I'm just visiting womanhood, casually consuming it so that maybe this shit will mean something to me. I mean look at me. There is nothing endearing or cute or attractive about the way I look. I'm just this weird kid trying not to be weird and failing in front of people I hold in high esteem. I'm much too big, much too intense, much too me to be a person to whom this experience truly belongs, to be someone who even remotely belongs here. This literally had me remeasuring my own height because I couldn't have possibly grown from last time, had I really gaslit myself into believing these men towered over me? I can't suspend my disbelief enough to feel like this is anything but thinly veiled transaction nor can I immerse myself enough to overcome my inability to read others' expressions to intuit how they feel about me. I've never been one for reading between the lines so an experience like this is hand crafted to be both overwhelming and underwhelming I'm ways that are hilariously disorienting and depressing.

I feel ridiculous for thinking that I was normal. For wanting to be normal and wating to enjoy a, while certainly not common, still rather unremarkable interaction. I think I wanted to be laughed at because at least that's an expression I understand, regardless of how someone feels about you making them laugh seems to overcome some level of decorum, it's the sliver of raw humanity that breaks through our built affects, the masks we wear to pretend we're civilized. I'm afraid that with as many masks and proxies that I've so painstakingly designed that the mask is only as convincing as its wearer and the fact that I've never been human means my masks aren't either.

#journal #the big shrink #agender #nonbinary #they/them #kpop #kpop concert #gender dysphoria #body dysmorphia

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mrsrcbinscn · 5 years

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BDRPWriMo Task #6 - 10 Short-Short Stories

Task #6: Write ten short-short stories of no more than a paragraph long.

Franny Robinson’s musical influences; ten interview quotes about other musicians and singers that she says inspire her work

i. Jenny Lewis

“I dunno, there’s just-” Robinson paused and with her palms flat up, made claws with her hands as she searched for the words. “-something so honest about Jenny. I had the honor of performing with her once and I was just in awe. I think I have a little bit of a crush on her. I was first introduced to her work in 2001 by a great friend of mine from college, Dani Weiss [currently a member of the American-Canadian newgrass band The Weepy Willows]. We were...going on a little trip -

Q: Acid or shrooms?

“My husband is sitting right there, oh god. Acid. In moderation, I think things like that can be worthwhile experiences. In moderation. We were doing acid in her apartment and listenin’ to music and she [Weiss] put on their album Take Offs and Landings. I was real into it from Go Ahead [the first track]. Which. I always liked chill music when I dropped acid, anything too loud and busy made me anxious. And when the followup, The Execution of All Things came out, it was like - I was like - just like, ‘damn, this woman is amazing.’ Her songwriting ability is just phenomenal and her voice- I feel like I’m sittin’ across from her and she’s tellin’ me stories. There’s- again, the only thing I can think of is this honesty about her.”

ii. Hizuru

“Japan actually has a vibrant history with jazz music, so I’m familiar with a lot of Japanese jazz and have had the honor of working with many talented Japanese jazz musicians. I don’t know very much about Hizuru, actually, other than I love them. I have been experimenting with incorporating traditional Cambodian music with, you know, jazz and other western styles of music. That part of my culture is very important to me, so I want - I want to show the world how beautiful instruments like tro and chapei are. Anyway- I was struggling with a balance of sounds when in 2017 I stumbled upon a Hizuru song called - oh, god, I don’t speak Japanese, so I’ll probably butcher this. The song is called Ushiwakamaru. It is an instrumental piece, as is the entire self-titled album, and the blend of traditional Japanese music and modern jazz on that entire album is perfection. I hope they come out with more soon, I am hungry for more, truly.”

iii. Ella Fitzgerald

Q: Of the early jazz vocalists, who inspires you the most?

“Oh my god, Ella Fitzgerald. Well - mm, no, absolutely her, no question. I am by no means implying I live up to her standard, in fact I never will, but I have channeled her. Especially in my earlier work when I was a bit more concerned with going what jazz fans want, expect, and love versus taking lessons from those who came before me and building on that with my own ideas, my own voice. If that makes sense? She was classic. It’s Only A Paper Moon was, I think, the first jazz song I heard when I was little. Or, it was the first that really struck me. [laughs] My oldest brother used his birthday money to buy an Ella Fitzgerald album for me on vinyl so I would stop running around the house singing the only lyrics I remembered. I think it was like [singing]- Say, its only a paper moon, sailing over a cardboard sea...and I forgot the rest so I could just repeat cardboard sea like three times.”

iv. Patsy Cline

“I’m from Georgia,” laughs Robinson, running a hand through her hair as she pulls her feet up under her on the chaise lounge in her Swynlake home. “Like, out in the country in Georgia. You couldn’t grow up there in the eighties and not have known who Patsy Cline and Dolly Parton were. Dolly was more, like, relevant and current, but Patsy’s a classic. And as a woman whose natural register is lower myself, I really appreciated being able to sing along decently well without much effort. We don’t - we don’t get to see alto voices in popular music a lot. Pop, even the jazz music that gets a following outside of hardcore jazz fans. Hitting the craziest high notes does seem to be a current trend across the genre spectrum.”

When asked if that was a bad thing, Robinson simply shook her head. “I don’t think it;s positive or negative one way or the other. It’s just an observation.”

v. Ahmad Jamal

“I mean, if you want to talk jazz pianists, you can’t not talk about Ahmad Jamal. On Green Dolphin Street? Autumn Rain? F---, man, leaving him out is criminal. He’s been in the game for five decades, that’s longer than I’ve been alive. I only hope to be on his level. Like, I hear words from his piano. I understand what I’m supposed to be feeling, thinking, or seeing when I listen to his work. And with instrumental music, that’s a challenge. Classical? I struggle to listen to classical music. I think it’s beautiful, and I really respect classical musicians, but unless I’m explicitly aware of what picture this piece is supposed to paint in my head, when I tell a classical expert what a piece makes me feel, they’re usually like ‘ACTUALLY...’

vi. Édith Piaf

“My father - well, he’s technically my stepfather,” Robinson said, scowling at the word like it was a swear. “But, he adopted me when he married my mother, and my biological father may as well have been a sperm donor. Anyway. My father is from Switzerland, and they have four official languages there. He speaks them all, plus English, plus he learned to speak Khmer when he married my mother. He’s so cool, my dad. He’s from a Francophone-Italophone Swiss family, so I grew up listening to a lot of old French, Italian, and some German music from him. I still don’t speak German and Italian though, [laughs] sorry Dad.”

“We listened to Édith Piaf a lot together. I was very protective of my mother as a child, you know how kids of single moms are? My mom was my superhero and I was used to American men thinking they had a right to touch her because she was just a poor foreign woman who owned a restaurant. So when my future dad started hanging around, I hated him. But he was determined to make me like him so I’d let him marry my mother, and he’d take me for ice cream and play Édith Piaf cassettes in the car. He’d tell me about what the love songs meant, and didn’t tell me about the songs that weren’t, and told me the love songs are how he felt about my mother. He was like, ‘Dara-’ my legal first name is Darareaksmey, it’s Khmer. My parents usually calls me ‘Dara.’ ‘Dara, if you let me, I’ll be good to your mother, and to you.’ I eventually got tired of him begging me to marry my mom so I let him. [laughs]

I asked if she ever regretted giving him her blessing.

“No, never. He’s my dad, and the two boys he brought into the marriage are my older brothers. I’m my Swiss grandparents’ only granddaughter, so they spoiled me even from Switzerland. No, we’re family.”

vii. Dolores O'Riordan

Interview date, 26th of January, 2018

Q: Let’s talk about something I just found out about you from your Twitter feed the other day.

A: Oh, no, should I tell my husband to cover his ears?

Q: No, it’s rated H for Husband.

A: Excellent.

Q: You’re a huge fan of Dolores O’Riordan. Which, I wouldn’t have guessed. But on the day the tragic news of her passing broke, you Tweeted out a tribute to her including ffive meet and greet pictures of the two of you together- the first, correct me if I’m wrong, is from 1994?

A: Yes, yes I had actually seen then the year prior, when I was thirteen, but ‘94 was the first time I could afford a backstage package with my babysitting money. The other four are from 1999, 2002, 2010, and 2016. I loved The Cranberries, they were the first concert I dragged my husband to when we were dating.

Q: Safe to say you’ve been a hardcore fan for-

A: Two and a half decades, yeah. Yeah, The Cranberries are one of my all time favorites. Dolores O’Riordan’s voice was...everything.

Q: You’re a jazz artist, primarily. What’s consistently drawn you to The Cranberries?

A: [laughs] Other than being a teenager in the 90′s? I mean, her voice. She changed the game for what it meant to be a female vocalist in rock music. And up until my second year at NYU, I wasn’t sure where I was going with music. I loved rock, I loved jazz, I was into R&B, I loved bluegrass. I sang in several bands in high school and college, and The Cranberries were usually on the setlist. Her voice was amazing. I idolized her as a young vocalist, even if I ended up gravitating toward a different genre.

Q: You uploaded a cover of Dreams with Irish alt-rock singer and guitarist Padraig Chen, and Irish indie musician Siobhán Walsh as well. How did that collaboration come about?

A: Padraig’s been a friend of mine for a long time; we met through a mutual friend who is also an Asian-diaspora musician in the UK and Ireland and it was a match made in music heaven. We’ve collaborated a lot. Siobhán is a friend of Pat’s, and we all looked up to Dolores, so we just got together and made our little tribute to her.

viii. Badi Assad

“I was first introduced to bossa nova...probably during my sophomore year of college. Her voice is like butter, but frankly, that’s not the most interesting thing about her. She combines traditional jazz, bossa nova, other Latin music elements, and traditional Middle Eastern sounds. Anything that is a marriage of different tastes and cultures is interesting to me, and when its done as well as she does it? Forget it. She is one of the best jazz and jazz-adjacent guitarists out there today. I really admire her. I hope to perform with her one day, it’s genuinely a dream of mine.”

ix. Ros Serey Sothea

“One of my most unexpected musical influences...well, I don’t - I don’t think she’s so much unexpected, as any of my following outside of my small Cambodian or Khmer-American following won’t have ever heard of. Ros Serey Sothea is one of the most important singer in Khmer popular music history, she’s called the Golden Voice. My mother would sing her songs to me as a child, whichever of them she could remember. Under the Khmer Rogue, which my mother survived, something like 90% of Cambodia’s artists, dancers, musicians, and singers died or were executed. She was one of them. And my mother’s favorite singer. Most of the master recordings from her and other singers like Pen Ran and Sinn Sisamouth were destroyed by the Khmer Rogue, so whatever recordings we do have of Khmer rock and roll from that era are so, so vital to preserve and keep record of. Even though I am a jazz music educator, at my lower level, more generic classes where I have the wiggle room to do so, I talk about Khmer music of the 60s and early 70s for a class because I feel so strongly about the legacy of this music.”

“I went on a tangent,” Robinson said apologetically. “Where was I? Oh, Ros Serey Sothea. Right, so her voice was just-” Robinson put her arms out to her side and swayed to the imaginary music in her head. “-you could just kind groove like this to only her voice, nothing else needed. Her voice danced on top of the backing band. My mother managed to get her hands on some records, her siblings who remained in Cambodia sent some to us and her other siblings who were resettled, in the mid-eighties. So, I was six or seven before I heard my first Khmer song from a record player or a cassette instead of my mother’s voice, even though she’d been singing to me since I was born. These songs are still incredibly important to Cambodians today, and diaspora as well.”

I asked her if that had anything to do with the semi-viral success of her recent cover of 70′s singer Sieng Vannthy’s ‘Console Me’.

“Oh, for sure.” Robinson said. "It’s the first time I professionally recorded a song in Khmer, a lot of people were surprised I spoke the language.”

x. Dolly Parton

“Okay, Dolly probably has less of an influence on my music than my persona, I’ll be honest. But her music means so much to me. At my wedding, during toasts, my mother mortified me by throwin’ in video footage of my first ever live performance from ‘89. Little nine-year-old Franny was on stage in little secondhand cowboy boots, this horribly 80s lookin’ frilly dress, my hair in little twin braids, singin’ and dancin’ to Why’d You Come In Here Lookin’ Like That. To this day, my husband still brings that up.”

Q: How do you mean Dolly Parton influenced your persona?

“Great question. So, our origins are similar. Kind of. She grew up poor one of twelve children, I grew up poor, one of three. My family eventually was lucky enough to make it out of the poverty I was born into but we were still always poor, you know? Like. I remember my mom rationing her food so I could eat enough until that stopped when I was about seven and my mom didn’t have to make a meal for herself last two meals. And we’re both from the American South.”

“I grew up on Dolly. She’s the queen of our people [laughs] and I’m not even being facetious. We love her. Can’t get enough of her. And I include myself in that; Dolly Parton is an icon. She is unashamed of who she is and where she comes from, which really struck a chord with me. As the American-born daughter of a refugee, I was always caught between two cultures. Am I Cambodian, am I American? Which can I claim? My mother taught to me my Cambodian culture, our Vietnamese friends taught me about Vietnamese culture, but my white father was from Switzerland so I didn’t learn to be American until school. That’s when I started droppin’ my G’s, sayin’ y’all and ain’t, and asking my parents to make grits for breakfast when they’d never eaten them before in their immigrant lives. I wanted so badly to just be seen as American, to be seen as just a girl from Georgia. If it weren’t for my mother refusing to let me speak English to her at home I would have lost my Khmer. She spoke English just fine, but English was for Out There.”

“My mom taught me to be proudly Cambodian, but I’m not just Cambodian, right? I mean, I’m biracial, sure. But more importantly, I’m bi-cultural. I’m not just Cambodian, I’m American - Southern, if we wanna get real specific. Both of my cultures are vibrant, and beautiful, and are equally important to me. My mom taught me not to be ashamed to be the daughter of a refugee - she didn’t get into specifics until I was older, but she was always made it clear she had Been Through Some Shit and could handle anything. Even now, when I go through something difficult I just tell myself, ‘Mom survived genocide, you can do whatever this is.’ I knew how to be proudly Cambodian, I knew how to wear traditional dress to nice events, and wear Khmer wedding clothes for my wedding instead of a white dress. But I didn’t know how to embrace this other part of myself - because wasn’t raised in the default Middle America. Even my American side is a type of odd culture, isn’t it?

Dolly Parton taught me not to be ashamed of the other half of where I came from. She is unapologetic about bein’ who she is. She is proud of where she came from. And I want to be the Dolly Parton of my rural Georgia town. My identities as Cambodian and Georgian are more important to be than my identity as, like, an American person in general. I want people to think, ‘that’s a Georgia woman’ when they think of me, just like you look at Dolly and say ‘that’s a Appalachian girl’ before you just go ‘oh, she’s American.’

#bdrpwrimomckala #bdrpwrimo #&&...hc #// some of these got long fight me #franny has feelings about music

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eeveelutionsforequality · 7 years

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Idk if any of u have seen it, but there's a post going around with 3 fandom laws (which are actually on point), but there is a version that says these are great up to a point b/c romanticism of pedophilia/rape/trauma gives actual predators a place to hide, find community, and hurt minors. Idk why but that post really sets me off. I don't really want to read about those subjects myself, but people can write wtf they want n I know ppl who have been helped by reading/writing that kinda stuff.

My fandom rules are: Tag everything so that people can avoid what they want to avoid, don't put hate in the tags, don't contact creators/actors/youtubers/etc with unsolicited things that may be uncomfortable for them (ie it's fine to put fanfics in the Dan and Phil tag because they use them for videos, but it's not fine to message them and be aggressive about the fact that you think that they're/want them to be together), and that no dumb online thing is worth trying to bully or hurt someone.

If someone is being abusive or a predator, then you need to actually provide proof when you warn people about them in callout posts. Like, when I was in one fandom a few years ago I got pretty popular, I dated a couple of other fandom members, and people accused me of using the fandom and my popularity to get girlfriends, when in reality it just so happened that we shared a mutual interest in something and became close because of it. People decided that there was a power imbalance because I had more followers than them, and it was one of the things that started my anti-SJW phase because I was fed up of the term "power imbalance" being thrown around to describe things that actually had no bearing on the relationship. So callout posts for shit like that (although I don't think they made one about me) really desensitize people, and eventually nobody takes a callout post to mean anything more than "I wanna start beef with this person to get more followers" - which sucks because in a situation where there are lots of young people, you do need some level of moderation and warning for when somebody genuinely is a danger to them.

Here's the thing though, predators are going to be predators, no matter what you write or do. Manipulation can make you trust someone, rely on them, ignore the bad things they do, and it doesn't require you to have romanticized or normalized anything to happen - if anything, being exposed to a lot of that fiction and thus a lot of the criticisms and posts that say "X is fine in fiction but not okay in reality" is going to start making you a lot more aware of those things and quicker to realize "Actually, I shouldn't be being made to feel like this, and I remember a post saying that what they're doing now is actually an abuse tactic". My opinion is that education is always better than censorship, and if you keep people in the dark and keep things more taboo then it actually puts them more at risk because they don't know enough about the topic to see what's really happening. Take drugs, for example (no, don't take drugs, that was poor wording...), if you don't tell someone that the trip on shrooms will exaggerate and feed on whatever mood you're in, and so you need to be in a good mood and a safe place when you take them, people might take them at the wrong time and end up having a horrible trip, getting hurt, or worse. Some people might say "You're encouraging drug use!" but you're not, you're not telling people to take drugs or telling them that it's a good thing to do... you're just aware of the fact that ultimately some people will take drugs and they're better off doing so while informed on the topic.

And people know that drugs are bad, we see it everywhere - same with abuse and rape. If you write a story about drugs, that alone isn't enough to convince someone to change their opinion on drugs. Sure, you'll get people like the Slenderman girls, but one of them had schizophrenia and the other schizotypical (I think that was it, might have been schizoid or something) personality disorder - they were susceptible to influence and ultimately that just pushed the right buttons and nobody was paying enough attention to them and their posts online to realize what they were going through. In general, people's morals are pretty solidified by the time they start reading NSFW stuff, and if they're not then they're not really mature enough to be reading that stuff and their parents should be making more of an effort to keep an eye on them. Fiction can't change your morals, in fact being exposed to stuff you morally oppose usually reinforces that opposition. Sure, over time you can become desensitized to representations of things, but people who binge horror movies would still come back scarred if they went to war, because you aren't desensitized to the reality of the situation, just the romanticized version of it. Like, if you read Fifty Shades and then get abused, you don't feel how she felt in the book, because the book is a romanticization - you're still aware that the reality is not fun and it's scary, and no amount of floral language will ever change how it feels to you.

I love writing horror or taboo things. I feel like the author's job is to evoke a range of emotions in the reader - sure, I could just write a book that only came with positive emotions, but that's boring. I want them to feel sad, disturbed, sick, afraid, angry, amused, relieved... and not just because the happy parts feel better when they mean something amidst the rest, but because we have this vast array of emotions and when we feel them in a real world context then we can't escape them and it's not fun. When we feel them in the context of entertainment, they can disappear immediately if we just close the book or turn off the TV, we're completely safe to explore and embrace them, and it gives us the chance to enjoy even bad thoughts and bad feelings, to explore the darker parts of our mind and primitive or bad urges and desires that have no place in the real world, that we have no intention of ever acting on but that we all have in our brain somewhere. None of us are perfect, we all get enraged and imagine carving out someone's eyes with a screwdriver - doesn't mean we're bad people or we'd ever do it - but locking those thoughts away and being afraid of them gives them more power. I think daydreams and stories and stuff just kind of let us get things out, and they can reach boiling point and then gradually cool down, cooling us with them and putting our dumb problems or weird fantasies in perspective.

Anyway, I'm rambling. Like I said, just tag everything and be a nice person, it really sucks that people want to police fiction and hamper creativity.

~ Vape

#Mod Vaporeon

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fraudulence-paradox · 4 years

Text

10/13/16

Well, that was quick. R----- and I are already done. Almost as fast as it started it finished. Our breakup isn’t a terribly interesting story, so I’ll just give you, dear reader, the cliffs notes of the whole relationship

Pre-relationship (~2 weeks) - Lots of sex - great vibes from R----- - Holy shit, she could be the one, she’s everything perfect in a girlfriend for me - Sex drive that matches mine - Smokes with me

Relationship (~8 weeks) - Gives me chlamydia* - No sex for a week because we’re both on medication for said chlamydia - (Side note, did you know the cure for chlamydia is like 1 pill and then no sex for a week? that’s fuckin it! why does health class make std’s seem like the end of the world?) - We smoke a fuckton - She actually does things for me like bring me stuff at work, I do things for her like randomly bring her food - Meet her friends, they’re cool; is this what a real relationship is like? This is great! - meds give her a terrible yeast infection, no sex for another week - past two weeks with no sex we’ve been connecting other ways, talking and having a good time overall. So weird to be in a relationship where sex isn’t the only thing keeping us together.. - finally gets better, have a day where we go all over campus and fuck in a bunch of empty classrooms and one poor, poor TA’s office. Sorry, TA. - Gets sick and has to go on more antibiotics, so no sex for another week (some antibiotics lead to yeast infections in some girls. Who knew?) - Kind of frustrating, but find other ways to connect like before - Things are going pretty well, we both really like each other, i have no major complaints other than how much she talks about cocaine, but she hasn’t done it in months so it’s not a major concern. This is probably how T---a felt when I talked about shrooms or weed - Keeps being sick for another week, inexplicably (The whole relationship there was about 5 total days we had sex, fun fact) - Finally cured, have lots of sex again - meet her mom - Things are going really well, I’ve never liked someone as a person this much, and liked everything else about them this much. She seems so perfect for me. She barely has any flaws in my eyes** - Say the dreaded “L-word”, but for the first time in my entire life, I actually meant it. I managed to wait just over a month to say it too, which may be a record for me - Oh boy, we’re in love! Nothing can stop us now. We’ll probably get married. Oh boy!

SUDDENLY

- She sees that her ex has a new girlfriend and becomes very upset. It’s understandable. They dated for a year and a half, and it’s been 6 months since they broke up. She still is emotional about it - She gets deeply depressed. Both because of her ex’s girlfriend and because she even cares about her ex still - She cuts - For a week she is thrown into a deep depression - I try to be supportive, but don’t know what to do - She’s still depressed - It’s not fucking going away - What happened. Oh my god what fucking happened. Everything is falling apart - We hang out all weekend, like we normally do, and I sleep over both nights, like I normally did - The next morning she’s weird. She tells me her whole bed smells like my sweat (it did, so my bad) and it’s really annoying - I go home, kind of hurt from the whole ordeal, but can’t really blame her - She texts me a slurry of other complaints about me - I’m hurt - We hang out that night anyway - Things are weird. - I’m afraid to even touch her, because one of the things she said was I touch her too much. - She doesn’t talk to me so I’m just sitting in a crowd of her friends, depressed. - She doesn’t seem to like me anymore - In the following days she stops saying she loves me - I don’t know whats wrong - We get in more and more arguments over stupid things - She’s stressed because she realizes she will likely be working as a nanny the rest of her life unless she makes a major change, and she doesn’t want to make a major change - She doesn’t want to tell me about what’s stressing her out anymore, I guess because I’m bad at knowing what to say - She gets so upset with me we decide to take a break

Break (~5 days) - R----- basically says she doesn’t feel ready to be in a relationship with me right now, but maybe in the future we could be - Says “I don’t want to be dating you right now, but I don’t want to lose you either” - I get really drunk to cope with my feelings and don’t tell anyone about what’s happening - We have a pretty good time, until C---s drunkenly calls his sort of girlfriend who lives in CA and they might as well not be dating?? (i’m not sure it’s really complicated) - she dumps him - We eventually all crash - I get a phone call at 4:30 am - R----- is on campus - She was hanging out with C---s but wants to see me - Okay - I go talk to her - She tells me basically what happened was she talked to her ex, and said she still loved him and asked how he got over her so fast because she wasn’t over him - said she still loved him - I’m extremely hurt - Tell her it’s okay, we can work it out - Go back to bed because it’s fucking 5 am at this point - Wake up to a text from her - we get in another argument, stemmed by her saying “stop saying it’s okay”. I’m not sure what she wanted me to say instead, but when I said otherwise the night before she said we should just break up. I didn’t want to break up - argument escalates - call her - over the phone she tells me it would be better if we were just friends - oh - okay - - - - depressed for a few days - R----- keeps trying to contact me - i keep trying to contact her - mutual friend says to give each other some space*** - mutual friend, C---s and I all hang out - I get very drunk and begin talking to R----- - tell her how unfair this all is - how much it’s hurting me - guilt tripped her a little too much maybe - but it was all true - feel sort of better - leave her alone a few more days - she texts me again saying she doesn’t want to be in a relationship at all - asks if i want to be her fuckbuddy - thinking with my dick, I consider it - she says there may be others - I say i’m not interested then - try to move on - can’t - just want to see her one more time - ask to see her - she says “I don’t really want to see you right now” - really hurts - I tell her to fuck off, I don’t want to hear from her again - we argue one last time, but it ends with this text:

R-----: I do care I hurt you a lot. Scott had me on fucking suicide watch this weekend, so don’t you dare say I don’t care. You don’t even fucking know.

R-----: I’m sorry I thought you weren’t a dick I guess.

Me: You know what the fucked up thing is? You did this. You dumped me. You can’t get over your alcoholic piece of shit ex, so you dumped me. Not because I did anything wrong (unless texting you too much was really THAT much of an issue), but because you couldn’t get over your ex. Do you have any idea how it feels to be told by someone you love that they are happier because you haven’t talked to them in a week? Do you have any clue how fucking upset i’ve been because you put me in this purgatory of not wanting to date me, but not wanting to lose me? Why am I a dick? What the fuck did I do other than tell you I don’t want to be your sex toy to make you think I’m a dick? I loved you and you pushed me away, just like everyone else apparently. So don’t kill yourself because you’re getting exactly what you want.

(Exact transcript of text messages sent that day)

- And then it was over.

So that’s been my first month of school. As a result of being wrapped up in that shitshow, my grades have been slipping (straight B’s, relax), and I’m still kind of a mess. It’s a good thing I got out of it though, because in those first few weeks, where everything was good, I was overlooking a lot. Even though this was a lot healthier than every relationship I’ve ever been in prior, I was still overlooking a lot of flaws. To quote Wanda from Bojack Horseman, “When you look at someone through rose-colored lenses, all the red flags just look like flags”.

When you look at someone through rose-colored lenses, all the red flags just look like flags. Red fucking flags.

I wish I didn’t get so emotional about girls I’ve known for 30 days.

*I’d just like to point out, she did not, in fact, give me chlamydia. She merely made me go into the Dr’s office to get a chlamydia test because she had it. The test came back negative. Now the difference here is pretty pedantic, but I want it known to god and the world that the white blood cells in my dick are so fucking powerful, that I did not contract this disease, I was merely exposed to it. – (06/24/20)

**Not to be all basic tumblr, but, “Oh my sweet summer child.” She was so fucked, [fraudulence-paradox]. How did you, in your naive 19 year old mind, not see that? -- 07/07/20

***Note from the future: “mutual friend” is M---- — 12/6/16

#relationships #relationship #breakup #break up #journal #personal #chlamydia #std #sti #college #college journal

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introisms · 5 years

Text

* wong yukhei. he/him. cismale. ╱ i am pretty sure i saw ashley ’ash’ huang at manon’s party that night. the twenty one year old is in their second year at west bridge studying film. i hear they were at manon’s party because he always went to manon’s parties or out with her/her friends. i wonder if they got the same restricted call as us. will they comply? + worn down denim jackets, messy stacks of dvd cases, bong disguised as a travel coffee mug . ◜ blue. 18+. est. she/they. ◞ ( yogi bae ex connection + extra cirriculars: track team, newspaper, gaming club )

[ P I N T E R E S T ]

bio:

good at running theyre definitely very good on the track team yeah he’s not got the longest legs in the world and also has definitely aged his lungs from smoking too much so he needs someone with his inhaler at the end of the track but thats okay you dont need to worry about that. sometimes he skips meets though has probably been threatened to be kicked off once or twice but somehow managed to keep himself on.

also good at dining and dashing. you guys want to go to mcdonalds? yeah he’s not paying and by the time you realize its either your wallet coming out youll have to catch up with him about a block away. yeah he has sticky fingers and yes he does realize thats its like morally wrong but he does try to say its morrally grey more than anything else

hes easily youre every day burn out if you need someone to give you weed hes your guy at a party hes the first one to offer up a joint and if youre really feeling like it shrooms. he doesnt do anything too hard but he likes to have fun. hes definitely very loud and obnoxious hes always the centre of attention or at least tries to be even if that means he has to do multiple keg stands and spend ten minutes in the bathroom just to go back out there. its not exactly what you would expect because he’s definitely a lot quieter in the day.

he loves movies that are so bad his extensive film collection has it all and then some seriously he has enough dvds in milk crates that he could make a whole new bed frame out of them from texas chainsaw massacre 2 to return of the living dead hes a walking film encyclopedia hes definitely the randy from scream meets much cooler marty from cabin in the woods. yeah he spouts off crazy ass theories all the time yes he listened to 40 hours of true crime podcasts and creepypastas last week and yes he submitted his film history assignment about 30 minutes late because he was too busy writing an alternate theory to the candle cove or some shit.

hes an only child with a single mother she worked her ass off for them since she had him very young and he couldnt be more grateful for the life he was given. he learned how to have fun with the little things and yes he defintiely suffers from the only child weridness but its kind of fun.

loves a good night out while he loves to party he can try and make any dumb situation fun. whether it be stealing a shopping cart and ending up with a broken arm or at the skatepark thats really on you if youre willing to follow him. honestly he lives by a if im going to die if im going to taken down it will be on my own terms by my own hands. or you know youre just going to skateboard over to the 711 get a couple slushies and maybe spray paint a cop car. LMSDLMSLM

runs a conspiracy column on the school news paper offers out advice and started a conspiracy theory that the grading system is backwards hes really just trying to convince that so he can get away with barely making it.

makes bad horror films for class hes really hoping one day he’s going to stumble on the next blair witch except its actually interesting and good and he treats them right instead of making a terrible walking simulator movie with a shit ending.

bisexual and very proud of it hes very flirty and just overconfident in what he does stupid idiot thats all i have to say about him. hes just a goof and a lot of times that shit comes off as super flirting and most of the time it actually is.

makes friendship bracelets. he will just give you one he thinks theyre really cool yeah maybe hes got some vsco girl traits whos seriously gonna clock him for that.

nintendos whore has over 3000 hours in animal crossing new leaf actually planned his own funeral when lucky moved out.

doesnt show up to class sometimes actually a lot of times yeah you know that cliche of a student skateboarding down the hallways to make it ontime from the early 2000′s movies thats him. fell asleep under the bleachers at a track meet and almost got kicked off the team and just said that he had diarrhea

makes too many jokes about jacking off doesnt even mean it most of the time has used it as an excuse to get out of hanging out with people really was just drinking a third can of monster energy drink and dipping a oreo in it to see how far to the edge he could push his body.

loves synth music and movie soundtracks has a playlist of just five hours of vaporwave

doesnt really know what hes doing usually just talks and thats it hes bad for interrupting and talking too much forgets a frozen pizza in the oven and almost got his dorm burnt down because of it.

listens to only emo music and punk music from before 2008 and says vibe check constantly about anything. vibe check

WCS

tinder date/ set ups that either led to something or didnt

good friend who hacked their instagram one night and started responding to dms just funny doesnt have to been anything crude. they do it to each other some nights like just hang out

hookups. good or bad. one night stand or on going.

party friends

they stole your muses bike and they caught them LSMDLSMDLMDSLM

they stayed up one night and tried to fully solve a cold case even went to the library so late that they got kicked out. it was a long night full of energy drinks and crazy theories. they still do this sometimes now.

crushes they can be mutual or one sided i really dont mind. like i said before ash kind of gets crushes really easily and they kind of just dissapear out of nowhere as well but like we could work something out

exes any gender is good uhhh ash probably has never been in a serious relationship other than his high school one after that he was like uuuhhhhh we just dont know anymore dudes.

snuck them into a concert with them and maybe they drank when they were too young and ended up almost in trouble with the cops because they got caught. or just generally they dine and dash together or movie hop or go and do dumb shit together.

someone who they ‘tutor’ hes dumb as shit hes not tutoring anyone but really he just stolen answer to exams for them he doesnt always ask for payment but like usually free weed or maybe buy him a pizza or some shit

been in his films before he covered them in really bad fake blood and its probably a horror comedy

idk maybe a good influence makes him eat like... idk a salad at mcdonalds instead of two boxes of 20 chicken nuggets

share his bad films with him watches movies with him and gets high they made friendship bracelets together and put each others names on them they play video games they shoot the shit and yup thats that

camp friends/childhood friends

party friends

someone who thinks hes annoying as all hell

just friends/crushes/fwb idk

a roommate??? do we do those here i need to read the housing bit again

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