Things End | People Change - Four/Six
masterlist
taglist: @whumpsday @whumpycries @whumpwillow @why-not-ask-me-a-better-question @whumpshaped @suspicious-whumping-egg @chibichibivale @melancholy-in-the-morning @zillastar13 @bloodinkandashes @whump-me-all-night-long @sickophantic @thecyrulik @itsmyworld98
content: vampire whumpee, whumper turned whumpee, (lady) whumpee turned whumper, captivity, beating, panic attacks, dissociation, broken bones, dehumanisation, begging (for death at one point), questionable caretaking
It's Clary alone, this time, and Vincent's surprised, but he accepts it. She's getting braver. Good. Good for her.
He means it. He's happy that she's better, that she's working to live with everything he did to her. That she can be in his presence and not be so afraid anymore. Cai's told him a little, in their brief conversations, of what Clary's recovery was like, and it only made him feel more guilty and more grateful that she's given him a room and a bed and a meal every day, and given no indication that it could be taken.
Not that he doesn't think it could be. Of course. But it seems like it won't simply be on a whim. As long as he behaves, he gets to have it, and he's good at behaving.
"May I ask a question?" Vincent whispers.
Clary sighs, and shrugs. "Fine. Go ahead."
"Were you planning to take me here?" Vincent asks. "W-When you came to see me. I mean, you had… had the bed set up, and…"
She stares at the floor. "I don't know. The bed was here already, I just threw in an old nightstand and put the bedsheets on in case I ended up taking you for whatever reason. But the bed's here 'cause I used to sleep in it."
"You slept in the basement?" Vincent's confused.
"Because of the deadbolt," she mumbles.
Oh. Because of him. Vincent shifts uncomfortably and goes back to his meal.
Clary hates watching him feed, so she stares at the wall. Tense silence. She twists her stiff neck, and scratches where her scars are under her scarf.
"Were you going to kill me?" Vincent murmurs.
"No," Clary shrugs. "I mean, I wasn't planning to. I just… wanted to see what they'd done to you."
Vincent doesn't say anything. Clary isn't sure she's really seen any of it. The cuts and bruises and burns on his exposed skin are bad, the starving is horrific, but the begging.
The begging. How did they get him to beg for the pain like that? The Vincent she knew wouldn't debase himself in that way.
He didn't change, she reminds herself. They just killed a part of him. He didn't change.
Vincent drops the bag a good distance from himself, so that Clary doesn't have to get too close. She doesn't move from where she's standing against the wall.
"C-Clary?" he whispers. "I'm finished."
Cai's started giving Vincent his clothes, the ones he doesn't wear anymore. Vincent's hiding himself in a blue jumper that looks too big for him, and it's the same fucking one that Cai wore when Clary saw him again for the first time in years. It's not his fault. He doesn't know that it's important to her.
Why should Vincent get to have it? Why should he get to have anything from them, from her? Her heart is pounding in her ears. Chest hurts. He left her to die, and this is kind, this is the kind option, because even if she just let him go, he'd only be alone again.
"Clary?" Vincent says again, worry in his tone, and puts a tentative foot on the floor to stand up.
"Get away from me!" she snaps, and presses up against the wall.
Vincent immediately recoils, curling into himself. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I sh-shouldn't… I shouldn't have moved, I'm sorry."
He's right there, this fucking thing that has haunted her for the last four years, and he won't move if she tells him not to. Just like she wouldn't, just like he fucking trained her with the pain and the fights and the uncertainty.
"You!" she screams. "You did this to me!"
Of course he's scared. He's scared out of his stupid animal mind. But it's equally relieving when her fist finally connects with his muzzled face, and he can sink into pain. Pain is a lesson. Pain is a reminder. She hates him and that's all he needs to know or care about. Even if he wishes she didn't.
She grabs him by the hair and pins him to the floor, the force of it reverberating through his skull. He cries out, though it really could hurt worse. Clary still isn't that strong, but he'll be in however much pain she wants him to be, for however long she wants.
Clary holds him down with her left hand, even though he knows she's left handed and would hit him better with it. Because he broke her left wrist, snapped it in his grip unthinkingly, and his whimpers and cries only get louder as she repeatedly hits him in the face. Blood drips from his nose.
He goes entirely limp to make it easier to pull him up. She slams him into the bedpost by the shirt, and stands up, breathing heavily. She kicks him, again and again and again and again.
One of his ribs snaps. It's isn't a sensation he hasn't felt before. Still, a sob sticks in his throat and he raises his arms to defend himself, or to at least block any more blows to the face.
And she stops. She stares at this broken, pathetic creature on the floor in front of her, and she breathes out, and she wonders why in hell she feels like crying.
"Thank you," Vincent whimpers.
"Fuck you," she growls, but there's no real malice behind it.
And she leaves.
Cai finds her eventually, in the middle of the hallway, hugging her knees tightly, breathing as though she's drowned a moment before.
"What did he do?" Cai signs sharply.
"N-Nothing," Clary whispers. "I… I…"
Cai shushes her and kneels down, giving her his arm to squeeze. "Breathe. Four, six."
In for four, out for six. Clary breathes. In for four, out for six. Four, six, four, six, four six four six four six-
"I c-can't!" Clary pulls at her hair and Cai gently takes her hand and places it back on his arm.
"Yes, you can." Cai's whispery voice is gentle, steady. "Come on. Both hands."
"I want him gone!" she sobs. "I wanna send him back, I can't do this, I wanna send him back!"
"Think about it later," Cai replies. "You're upset."
"I know!"
Cai doesn't acknowledge the outburst. "Four, six."
Clary breathes. Cai counts for her. One, two, three, four, one, two, three, four, five, six. Two, four, three, six. Two, four, three, six. Four, six. Four. Six.
It's been four years, she's twenty-six. She's safe.
"Okay, can you do six and eight?" Cai says, using his other hand to gently rub her shoulder. "You got this."
Three, six, four, eight. Three, six, four, eight. She lets go of him. Six, eight. Six, eight. Six. Eight.
"I'm okay," she exhales. "I'm okay."
Cai smiles. "Okay, dickhead time."
He flips her hair into her face and she laughs. Weakly, but she laughs. She brushes it away. Cai helps her up, and gives her his awkward little pat on the shoulder.
"Peppermint tea?" he suggests. "And I'll go deal with… him."
"Yeah," Clary nods. "I, um… I hurt him."
"Okay," Cai shrugs. "I'm dealing with it."
The peppermint tea isn't really about the tea. It's about the process, having something to do with shaky hands, because you can't spill it. Their mother came up with it when they were kids after Cai was diagnosed with autism, as a self-soothing technique and to remedy his clumsiness. Cai adapted it for Clary's anxiety when she came back. Clary pulls the box from the kitchen cupboard. It's about the process. Focus.
Cai feels like he's going to need an entire pot of coffee after this.
He heads down to the basement. The moment he opens the door, Vincent scrambles back, cowering under the bed.
"Don't!" he pleads, eyes wide. "Please don't, please, I can't, please!"
"Come on," Cai sighs, and leans down to pull him out by the arm.
"NO!" Vincent struggles, but Cai's stronger than him, and he starts to sob as he's forced out from under the bed. "Please, PLEASE, anything else, please, I can't go back, d-don't make me go back!"
Cai lets Vincent's arm fall, and stares at him as he cries and curls up on the floor. There's a trail of blood from his nose leading down his cheek, and his chest is almost definitely swelling under his shirt. It actually isn't as bad as Cai thought it would be.
"Please, please," Vincent whispers, "don't send me back to them, I'll do anything, I'll do anything you want, please…"
"You heard that?" Cai asks. Same tone as always, but lacking the edge that Vincent's come to expect.
"Mhm," Vincent nods. "I- I'm sorry, I can't help it--"
"Shh," Cai says. Not shut up. "She didn't mean it. She was upset."
"She hates me," Vincent whimpers. "Please, please don't send me back. Please just kill me instead. Please kill me, please--"
"Neither of those things are happening," Cai interrupts, crouching down. "You're not going back, and you're not dying. You're staying here."
"But I- I wouldn't… if it were me I'd… I'd want me dead…"
"Well, unlike you, Clary's actually a good person."
Vincent doesn't understand. Vincent can't focus. Vincent is somewhere else again, more so than usual, and all he can see is the silver knife and the smile and then Cai takes off the muzzle.
Vincent slaps his hands to his mouth anyway. He can't bite, no matter how hungry he is. Cai sighs deeply.
"Come on, I'll lift you up," he mutters.
The whine of pain is piercing, but Cai doesn't hesitate. Vincent barely weighs a thing.
"Thank you, sir," Vincent mumbles.
"Cai, not sir," Cai gently corrects. "Come on, you know that. I'm gonna lay you down on the bed."
Not sir. Bed. Does he know that? He has a bed. He doesn't have one of those. Didn't have one of those.
"A bed," Cai repeats. "Laying you down now."
Vincent sinks into the mattress, and lets Cai sit him up. He slowly moves his hands from his mouth, wipes his eyes, and stares at his lap. The marks on his hands are fading, now. Fading. They aren't being replaced every day.
"M'sorry," Vincent says softly. "I… I didn't…"
Cai can't believe he ever thought Clary needed to be protected from this thing.
"You didn't know where you were," Cai finishes. "Yeah. How bad are you hurt?"
"I'll be fine," Vincent whispers.
Cai sighs. Fine, he'll rephrase to suit. "Is there anything I can do to make it hurt less? Painkillers or ice or something?"
Vincent shakes his head. "N-None of them work. As far as I know. We heal too fast for it to be useful, I think."
"You're not healing though," Cai says. "Not fast."
"It's…" Vincent tries to block Cai out of his view. "It's the blood. A-Animal blood is fine, it's good, it's--"
"Don't give me your whole grateful spiel again," Cai sighs. "I know. Just be honest."
"...animal blood will stop me from starving," Vincent mumbles. "But that's all. I need human blood to heal as normal. B-But more blood would- would help. Even animal blood."
Cai's fingers slip under his sleeve, and he scratches at his wrist for a moment. Then he backs out.
"Two bags a day, then," he says. "Clary does actually want you to heal, believe it or not. And… I'll leave the muzzle off for now. But only when it's just me."
"Oh. You don't have to do that."
"And? I'm gonna."
Vincent doesn't have a response for that.
Cai turns to leave, then stops for a moment. "If we did kill you, we'd do it quick. If that makes you feel any better."
"Thank you." Vincent almost smiles. "It does."
Cai isn't sure it should.
132 notes
·
View notes