i was telling my friend that i feel like the reason why bruce wayne can never be a perfect dad is because he's a vigilante / protector of gotham first and foremost. before being a son, a father, a citizen or a human, he sees his role as a protector of gotham- a soldier. that's why his robins and sidekicks are always going to be soldiers to him before being his kids. he'll give them harsh training, traumatize them, lick them into shape so that they can be the best soldier (in his eyes) they can be before they receive his care or affection. and... it's not right, but can you really blame him for ensuring his robins/sidekicks are on their toes at all times? they can't afford to make a mistake, they're only mortal!

maybe the mortality of his kids, the risk they face, is part of the reason why bruce can't be a gentle father. superman can afford to not train his kid so harshly because jon doesn't face the threats the batkids do. as long as bruce's kids are in this line of work, he can't assume the role of 'father' to them as much as he must assume the role of their trainer. they're his responsibility and each of their lives, if lost, is his failure. he can't risk that.