#great southern brood
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till 2037, brood xix <3
#cicadas#periodical cicadas#magicicada#great southern brood#brood xix#bugs#insects#art#illustration#crayon#postcard club#bigeelsart
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A general reminder—periodic cicadas pose no threat to anyone and their plant damage is limited to nipping off the ends of twigs. Please do not hose them with pesticide. They are slow and clumsy and confused and only want to make friends with other cicadas and eventually die of sexual exhaustion.
Yes, the screaming is a lot, but they’ve been extremely quiet neighbors for thirteen years, cut them some slack as they go through the most fraught time of their lives.
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I've been working on my yoinking technique
Genus Magicicada
#bugblr#arthropods#invertebrates#inverts#cicada#magicicada#periodical cicada#cicada summer 2024#brood xix#great southern brood
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Pehr Kalm - Wikipedia
Pehr Kalm (6 March 1716 – 16 November 1779), also known as Peter Kalm, was a Finnish-Swedish explorer, botanist, naturalist, and agricultural economist. He was one of the most important apostles of Carl Linnaeus.
#USA#Yle.fi#University of Connecticut#UCONN#Magicicada#Brood XIX#Brood XIII#13-year brood#17-year brood#The Great Southern Brood#The Northern Illinois Brood#Kaskaat#Laulukaskaat#17-vuotis kaskaat#13-vuotis kaskaat
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Heartbreak Amongst the Harem
A/N: It's here! Thank you to @just-ten-cents for the encouragement and beta writing for me! And like most of my writing, this is purely self-serving. Based off a dream I had about Mikey, but I threw is the other three just for spice and giggles. Enjoy!
Summary: Reader is in a poly relationship, and everything was going great, until a lack of communication and people's hurt feelings cause some loyalty issues.
Pairings: Mike (Hellraiser) x Plus Size!Reader, Captain Syverson x Plus Sized!Readaer, August Walker x Plus Sized!Reader, Walter Marshall x Plus Sized!Reader
Trigger Warnings: cheating, reverse harem, cussing, physical violence/threats of physical violence, hints and innuendos of smut, drinking and smoking, if there's anymore just let me know.
If someone would have told you a year ago you would be in a relationship with four men, who are more than happy to share you, you would have laughed in their face. It was a wonder even one out of the three older men took a second glance at you, let alone all three wanting you. You were less surprised about Mikey though. You were fully aware that he was a whore. He almost bragged about it when he could come in during your shifts at the bar.
All four had been customers at some point or other. Sy, Walter, and August had all grown up together. Despite being fourth cousins, twice removed, or however they tried to explain it to you, they grew up in tight knit families. Eventually, Sy went into the military, August was hired into the CIA and Walter went off to college and became a cop. But as life goes, it brought them back together when Sy retired, August chose to leave the CIA, and Walter offered to move them into his house to fill the void Faye left when she went to college.
Sy had started his own dog training business while August became a personal trainer for the police academy. Months after though was when Sy got the call from one of their other cousin’s, Liza. Liza had gotten pregnant at 17 and raised Mikey mostly on her own. When Mikey had gotten into college in the same city, she had practically BEGGED Sy and Walter to let him live with them so he would stay out of trouble. And it worked, for the most part. There had been a few times where some of Mikey’s flings had shown up to the house because he had ghosted them and they couldn’t handle it, but Walter had that straightened out pretty quickly.
The first time you met them, they had all come in for Mikey’s 22nd birthday, only wanting a couple drinks and some wings before going home for work the next morning. You were behind the bar, busting ass alone and looking fantastic while doing it. Sy and August had shared a look. It wasn’t uncommon for them to share a woman during their usual one night stands. Walter had rolled his eyes and shook his head. One day these three were going to get him killed. Despite his thought process though, he could agree that you were an attractive woman. All four men were flirting with you all night, causing a blush to cover not only your cheeks, but spread all the way down your neck and across your chest, much to their delight.
It went on that way for months, sometimes they would come in individually, just two or three of them, or as the whole group. Sometimes it was deep conversation about the darkness they had seen in the world, the battle of darkness inside of them, and the anger at the universe they held for making them go through that darkness alone. Everytime though they would flirt with you. Eventually, you fell in love with them.
Sy was the perfect southern gentleman, funny and sweet and respectful. He always told the worst dad jokes. August was snarky and sarcastic, but he called you Kitten and it just made you weak in the knees. Walter was grumpy and brooding, but the intellectual conversations you would have stimulated you mentally, which stimulated you sexually as well. He could also appreciate any insight you could provide from what little he could tell you about his cases.
And last but not least, Mikey. He had gotten the nickname Baby from you because of his baby face. He was like a puppy dog to you. It had taken some convincing from Mikey and the others for you to give him a chance. It was unconventional, but it worked for the five of you. Sy and August were your makeshift bouncers when your boss fired the last one you had without having someone to replace him and they never interfered with your job unless it was a risk to your safety. Sometimes when flirting with customers for tips they would get carried away, but that’s not the point.
Everything was going great, until you got that text that shattered everything. It had been a beautiful summer day in the middle of July. Sy had taken you and Walter on a trip for the weekend in between cases. The cabin on the lake was beautiful, lush green grass surrounding you, trees thick and abundant. Sy and Walter were on the docks fishing while you were sitting on the porch drinking a glass of moscato. August had appointments for a personal training business he had just started and Mikey had opted out, spouting something about having summer classes he had homework for. It struck you as odd, he hadn’t told you about taking summer classes before, but you shook it off and decided to have a good trip with the two lovers you had with you. There was no cell service out here so you had to entertain yourself.
After your much needed break with your boys, filled with sex and rest, it was back to business as usual. Walter had once asked you to move in, to which you had told him it was too soon. You would love to move in one day, when your relationship with all four men was at a more permanent standing. It wasn’t that you didn’t see a future with them, but you were still unsure as to how this poly situation would work long term. But that was a discussion for another day.
It was a week after your trip and you were hustling behind the bar, flipping bottles and slinging drinks. It was an extra busy Saturday night, the band being extremely popular amongst the local community. Sy and August were standing at the very end of the bar by the door, two sets of military trained eyes scoping every part of the crowded room. You’re so busy you don’t have time to check your phone when you see a notification from Mikey light your phone up.
It wasn’t until after the last customer had left and you finished all of your side work did you look at your phone. Sy was walking behind you to his truck, his hand in your back pocket. August had left after last call, saying he was gonna set up your nightly routine at home so it was ready when you got there. Your boys always treated you so well.
You unlock your phone and click on the notification. You weren’t surprised to see he had sent you a video, as Mikey had an obsession with TikToK and liked to share what he thought you would enjoy. As you wait for the video to load, Sy helps you climb into his truck, his hands pushing you by the ass into the seat, pinching just under the cheeks before you sit down.
“Ow, Sy!” you yelp. He just chuckles, vibrations coming from deep in his chest.
“Can’t help it, Sugar. It’s just so juicy,” he says as he sends you his signature failed wink, making you laugh as you call him an asshole. You had almost forgotten your phone in your hand until the video started playing. You watch, confused at first as to why you see your ex-coworker MaKenna on the screen. But the longer the video goes on, the worse it gets. She’s half naked, completely bare from the bottom down and bouncing on someone’s……. And then you see his face and your blood starts to boil.
It’s Mikey, under your ex-coworker, letting her ride reverse cowgirl. His hands are on her hips and his hips are meeting hers and you’re gonna get sick. MaKenna wasn’t exactly a bad coworker or person, you knew she was promiscuous, and you didn’t judge her for it. But she knew you and Mikey were together. And though it was an unconventional relationship you had with him and his cousins, you were big on loyalty and each man had pledged their loyalty only to you. So for him to have done this to you broke you on the inside.
Just as they start to get louder, tears start to burn in your eyes. Sy catches on to the noise coming from your phone and looks over the console to your phone. The second he recognizes his little cousin’s face, he’s pissed. He knew Mikey had been a slut, but it seems he needs to teach the little prick a lesson about messing around on the woman you promised to only give certain affections and attentions to.
“That little fucker. I’m gonna beat his ass.” he mumbles, starting to tear out of the parking lot and speed towards home. You ignore him, locking your phone and wiping the tears out of your eyes. You had confided in all four that you had been cheated on before, and all of them had worked hard to earn your trust. You never thought one of them would do something like this to you. Before you could stop it, a sob burst from your chest and out of your mouth. That’s when the dam really broke and you started crying uncontrollably.
“Oh baby. I’m sorry, I know it hurts. I’m gonna get you home and August and I are gonna take good care of ya. And then we’re gonna hunt down that little prick and kick his ass real good.” He reaches across the console to wipe the tears from your eyes before wrapping his arm around you and pulling you into his side. It’s uncomfortable, the console digging into your ribs, but you appreciate his attempt to love on you.
You pull into the driveway ten minutes later. Sy doesn’t even give you a chance to get out on your own, opening your door and wrapping his arms around your waist and carrying you inside the house. August had heard you pull in and met you at the door, one brow lifted in question. Then he saw your red, puffy eyes and his ocean eyes turned murderous. You simply just unlocked your phone and handed it to him, Sy walking away to let him watch the video without hurting you even further.
“What the actual fuck?!”
“I’m already planning to kick his ass so get in line. But right now she is my main priority,” Sy hollers behind his back. Normally you would admonish him for talking about you in front of you like you weren’t even there, but you were too busy trying to keep air in your lungs to really care about telling him off. Your chest hurt and your eyes stung and it just felt like your world had come crashing down. You knew you would owe Sy big time when this was over. August too.
Sy had carried you into the master bathroom where August had set up a bubble bath with candles and snacks. He had taken to spoiling you after your long shifts. You had found out very quickly he was dominant and took his duties as a dom seriously, and that included pampering you with only the best. Most weekend evenings/mornings after your shifts at the bar include a hot bubble bath with your favorite wine, snacks, and a good foot rub. That is usually followed by a full body massage with your favorite lotion. If you happened to stay awake during the massage, you’d then get the best dick down to finish you off and send you to sleep more than satisfied.
“Baby doll?” Sy’s voice pulls you out of whatever trance you were in. You look up into his eyes, before looking over his shoulder to August’s concerned gaze. You hate the pity you see in both of their eyes, hate knowing they are looking at you in such a vulnerable state.
“Do you want us to help you, Kitten?” August asks. You don’t know what you want. You want them there for comfort, as that’s what partners are for. You want the floor to open you up and swallow you whole. You want to forget that Mikey even exists and that you ever met him. You don’t know…..
August must see it on your face because he moves to the tub and takes the plug out to let the water drain. He then swiftly moves to the shower and turns it on as hot as you can stand it. Sy slowly starts to ease your shirt up and over your head, before moving to your jeans. You know there is nothing sexual motivating his actions, but you can’t help but bring your arms up to cover yourself. Sy squats down to his knees to help you take off your pants, and August moves to leave a kiss on your forehead before pulling out his phone and walking out of the room.
Sy moves you bodily to the shower, helping you slip in before telling you he’ll be in the other room when you get out.. You see him set out a towel and fresh clothes from Walter’s closet before leaving the bathroom. The sound of the door clicking shut resonates in the silent room. The only noise being the shower water hitting the tiled floor and your quiet sobbing. You slide to sit on the floor, bringing your knees to your chest and burying your head.
You felt ridiculous. Part of the reason you had been so hesitant to even consider adding Mikey to your little group was his history with women. All four men were open about how he treated his flings when he was done with them. You were also concerned about his age. You didn’t normally go for guys around your age, and especially younger. Three years wasn’t much of a gap physically, but maturity wise had been a big red flag to you.
Eventually you had cried yourself dry and the water had turned cold. You stood up, shutting off the water. You hadn’t even had the shower door fully open before Walter burst in the bathroom. You wanted to cover yourself, but he didn’t give you the chance. Before you could blink, he had you wrapped in his big arms, the wool of his sweater scratching against your bare skin. He sways you back and forth and you’re bombarded with the memory of him telling you this is how he used to get Faye to sleep when she was a baby.
“I’m so sorry, baby. August called me and I rushed right over.” he slowly releases you when he remembers you’re fully naked. He moves back to the toilet where he gets the towel and wraps it around you. You want to argue that you can dry and dress yourself, but the energy just doesn’t seem to be there. Once he’s satisfied that you've dried off enough, he pulls one of his softer sweaters over your head, lifting your arms and slotting them into the sleeves. He kneels with a pair of boxers in hand, lifting each foot and sliding the shorts up your legs. He makes a show of bringing them up over your ass, and you give him a small smile. All three of these beautiful men, trying to make you feel better. How did you get so lucky?
When Walter is happy that you are finally ready for bed, he scoops you up by the thighs and carried you into the bedroom. You see Sy already laying in bed, shirtless but wearing pajama bottoms. You hear August in the kitchen, assuming he’s putting away the snacks he had planned for your nightly routine. Walter lays you in the middle of the California King sized bed, right next to Sy, before moving to the closet to change into pajamas while Sy turns and snuggles into your side, wrapping his strong arms around your waist and ribs.
“I know this probably won’t mean much, but he doesn’t deserve you, Sugar.” Sy mumbles into your chest. Even now, you can’t help but find amusement in his obsession with your tits. His favorite pillows, he once said.
“Thanks, Sy.” you mumble. You feel the bed dip beside you, turning to find Walter getting in on your right side. He’s also shirtless only wearing pajama bottoms, and the fuzz on his chest is thicker than the others.
“He’s right, Love. You are an incredible woman, and it’s Michael’s loss if he can’t see that.” his voice rumbles through your whole body. They’re both so warm, so soft. You internally chuckle at the contradiction. All four of them had godlike bodies, firm muscles and virile masculine strength. You lose your amusement as you think of Mikey again.
You look up as August walks in, dressed just as the other two. You were prepared for the nightly argument of who was going to cuddle with you and how. When it came to sex, these men worked together like a well oiled machine, each one moving perfectly in sync with the other to bring you the highest heights of pleasure. But when it came to cuddles, they fought over you like children with a teddy bear. But none of that happened. With Sy on his side to your left, Walter on his side to your right, and you on your back in the middle, August made his way between your legs and laid right on top of you. His torso was half on top of you, with his head on your sternum right below your breasts, half on the bed between your thighs, and the rest of his body between your spread calves.
“I feel like I’m in a puppy pile,” you mutter, causing all three men to chuckle. They quiet quickly though, all three concluding you’re trying to hide your pain through humor. Three sets of arms squeeze you tightly, and you soak up the love radiating from the three beautiful souls surrounding you. Maybe this heartbreak will be easier to get over when you have three other boyfriends to take care of you. Soon, the snoring coming from Sy, the soothing hand August has rubbing your thigh, and Walter playing with your hair, on top of all of the crying you’ve done, lulls you into a deep sleep.
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When you wake up, the sun is shining through the windows. You’re used to the sun being high in the sky when you wake up, but never have you woken up with one of the guys, aside from Mikey, still in bed with you. Sy was never one to sleep much, years of military training now just ingrained into who he is as a human being. August was usually at the gym, and Walter would be on a case. So it shocked you to still have Walter by your side. You look up to his face and find he is watching you. You should have figured he wouldn’t have been asleep.
“How long have you been up?” you ask, voice hoarse from sleep. Your throat hurt from crying so much last night, and your head was throbbing. Despite having slept deeply for a decent amount of time, you were still exhausted. Your eyes burned and your body felt heavy.
“A few hours. I was up for a bit, but I didn’t want you to wake up alone.” he whispers. You always wondered how he always knew what you needed, even if it was something as small as keeping his voice low because your head hurts, when you didn’t even tell him.
“Thanks, babe. Where’s the other two?” you look around. You can hear someone working around in the kitchen. The smells of bacon and eggs finally hits your senses and your stomach grumbles. You silently wished Walter hadn’t heard. Out of the four, well now three, he was the most anal about making sure you ate enough and stayed hydrated. You look up and there it is, the pointed look he gives you everytime.
“Love, did you eat last night?” You look down in shame. You had a horrible habit of getting so caught up at work you forget to order food from the kitchen before it closes.
“You see, what had happened was..” you start. Walter rolls his eyes and huffs, beginning to roll away from you. You pull him back in protest.
“Listen to me! I didn’t have the chance to eat because I had to get the bar put together because Katie had to leave early and then we got slammed and Sheri couldn’t keep up with her tables so they kept coming up to the bar and then we just, didn’t slow down until after close, so Sy and I were going to go get something to eat and then….” you trail off, your brain bringing up the awful memory of what your….. You’re not even sure what to call Mikey. Walter notices where your mind seems to go and quickly put his hand under your chin and raises your eyes to his.
“Sy is making breakfast,” he starts.
“Fuck yeah,” you mumble. Sy was the best cook in the entire group, and his breakfast was fire. Walter rolls his eyes at that.
“And August went to the gym. Grumbling something about still being pissed off.” That last bit of information didn’t surprise you at all. August was crazy, as you had seen one night when a customer had gotten too handsy and decided to fight Auggie when he tried to throw him out. You were not ashamed to admit it made you so horny that you jumped him in the car at the end of your shift. It may have also revealed just how toxic you could be at times to the entire group. None of them seemed to mind though.
Just then, Sy came into the bedroom, carrying a tray full of food. You see french toast and biscuits and gravy, eggs, bacon, ham, fruit. All of your favorite breakfast foods. God you love these men. Sy sees you eyeing the tray and raises his eyebrows suggestively.
“Well good morning to you too, Sugar. You sleep alright?” He kisses your forehead while balancing the tray in his hand. You soak up the affection, staring at him as he brings the tray to sit in your lap. You pick up a fork and dig in, almost inhaling the fruit and french toast, feeding bites to each man beside you. It was almost perfect, until you heard the front door open and Mikey’s voice rings through the house. Your hand tightens around your fork and Walter is quick enough to move the tray off your lap as Sy flies off the bed and out of the room. You both quickly follow him, knowing deep down you wouldn’t be able to keep Sy from kicking his ass.
You stand at the top of the stairs and watch as Sy barrels towards Mikey, shoving him against the wall and holding him up by the front of the shirt. Walter moves you to the side, coming to stand on the steps in front of you but not shielding you from watching what was happening. Mikey’s eyes go wide and his hands go up at his sides.
“Woah, woah, woah. Easy, big guy. Good morning to you, too.” It wasn’t unusual for Sy and Mikey to wrestle in the house. But the look on Sy’s face told Mikey this was anything but playful.
“How was your studying session, Mike?” Sy snarls. His voice sent shivers down your spine. You almost feel sorry for anyone who had to go against your Captain. It was joked once that he was a bull, once he sees red there’s no running from him.
“It was fine. What is your problem, man?’ Mike stutters. That just seems to piss Sy off even more because he removes one hand and pulls it back before punching Mike in the stomach. The younger man doubles over before Sy lifts him back into a standing position. Part of you wants to step in. Yes Mike hurt you, but you don’t usually condone physical violence unless absolutely necessary. But on the other hand, Karma is a bitch, and he’s had more than enough coming his way.
“Now, you wanna try that again?” Sy growls. Mikey looks up to you, and your heart breaks all over again. You see the moment it clicks in his head, and shame fills his eyes.
“Sweetcheeks…” he tries. Sy shakes him hard.
“You don’t get to speak to her. You’re lucky August isn’t here because he wouldn’t be as easy on you as I am right now. I thought we had a clear understanding on what this relationship meant to her, and now you’ve set all of us back. She’s going to shut herself off and we’ll have to work double to get her trust back. Fucking idiot.” Sy pushes him harder into the wall before dropping him not so gently to the floor. You move past Walter and make your way down the stairs. You put a hand on Sy’s shoulder and he looks at you. You can hear his thoughts as loud as if he said them out loud; ‘you don’t have to do this’.
Mikey stands up and looks at you, flashing his puppy dog eyes and pouty lips. Normally it would melt your heart, but right now it just turns it to stone. You wonder how you would be responding if you didn’t have the strength of the two men behind you.
“Taking summer classes, huh? Does the name MaKenna ring a bell?” you seethe. You had once confided in how insecure she made you feel. She was your height but very petite. You had noted how her breasts were the perfect size that they just stayed perky, making you self-conscious of your larger chest that hangs low. Not that you didn’t love your body, but loving yourself is a long, bumpy road.
“Babycakes,” Mikey tries again.
“What did Sy say? You don’t have the privilege of speaking to me. Ya know, Mikey, it took a lot of convincing from your cousins to even get me to consider giving you a chance, based off your history with women. I knew from the get go this was going to end badly but I had that littlest bit of hope that I was wrong. I can’t even stand looking at you right now.” you say, turning away from him. You move but before you get too far, he reaches out and grabs your arm. You spin quickly, and before anyone can blink you slap him. Hard as fuck. Your palm stings and his face immediately turns red. You turn and run before he can see you start to cry.
“Great contact, Sugar.” Sy mumbles as you rush past him, giving Mikey one last hard look before following you upstairs. Walter, who had been silent during this entire altercation, finally looked at Mike.
“I’m not going to discuss any of this with you, right now. I’m more disappointed than angry,” he starts. Mikey rolls his eyes.
“No offense, Walt, but I don’t need the dad lecture at the moment,” he says sarcastically. That’s what finally set the normally stoic detective off.
“Obviously you do! Maybe if that piece of shit father of yours would have stuck around you would have turned out better.” That fucking stung. Mikey had taken some time to open up about his dad bailing on him and his mom. He blamed himself for a long time, something you strived to help him heal.
“But he didn’t, so now it is up to myself and the other two to teach you something about being a man. I understand that before her you made no commitments to the women you took to your bed. But when you actually make a promise to someone you don’t break it like that. I’m going to ask you once to leave. Take a few days at a friend’s while we discuss how we want to proceed from here.”
Mikey went to protest but the look on Walter’s face killed the argument before it could leave his mouth. He knew he fucked up, and he hears his mother’s voice in his head telling him to face the consequences of his decisions.
“Can I at least grab some stuff before I go?” he mumbles. Walter nods but says nothing else. He watches as Mikey gathers some things before moving towards the front door. He pauses before opening the door, turning back to the older man.
“I’m sorry, Walt.”
Walter shakes his head. “I’m not the one you should be apologizing to. We all have some talking to do, but for right now let the dust settle. She needs to heal some from this. And before you start accusing me of choosing a woman over family, remember that you are the one in the wrong in this scenario.”
And with that Walter went upstairs, leaving Mike to walk out of the house with his tail between his legs. Just as he was getting to his car, August pulls up beside him. Mike barely has his door open before August is on him, throwing him up against his car.
“I should beat the fuck out of you right now.” he hisses. If Mike thought Sy was scary, August was terrifying. He remembered one night when they all had had way too much to drink and August went to a really dark place mentally, giving a recount of just how many people he had killed during his time working for the CIA. Mike knew just how skilled August was in the arts of torture, and the thought alone of what he could do to him almost made him piss himself.
“Listen, Sy has already given it to me and she left this beautiful hand print on my face, so give me a break, okay? You can come at me later when Walter lets me back in the house,” he grumbles. August locks in on that last bit of information.
“Walter kicked you out?”
“He said it’s just for a few days.” August nods.
“Well whatever you do, do NOT go back to that little bitch’s house. Find a GUY friend to stay with. And call your mother, before one of us does.”
Mikey should have known that was coming. All three of the older men were fiercely loyal to his mother, and never missed an opportunity to let her know when he did something stupid. But this was probably the worst thing he could’ve told her. He sighs and gets in his car, thinking of who he could call that would let him stay a few days.
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August makes his way to the bedroom immediately upon walking into the house. He didn’t want to leave you this morning but he was still so pissed by what happened early this morning he knew it would do no one any good if he didn’t get it out of his system. So he went to the gym where he almost destroyed a punching bag and scared some staff members. One of his training buddies had finally had enough of him abusing the gym equipment and said something.
“Now what did the bag ever do to you?” Geralt asks. The man was taller than August with more muscle, but he had a more even temperament. August puts his hands down and huffs.
“I’m picturing Mikey’s face.” he growls. Geralt just raises a brow. August had talked about his little cousin and the relationship he had with the bartender. He’d been to the bar and wasn’t hesitant to admit he could understand the attraction. You were a beautiful woman, fiery and bubbly simultaneously. It was adorable.
“What did the little idiot do this time?” Geralt had come to calling him that after he had drunkenly picked up a rabid raccoon out of the dumpster and it bit him.
“He hooked up with MaKenna.” August says. Geralt pauses to rack his brain.
“The little redhead that worked there before she was fired for having sex in the parking lot during her shift?”
“That’s why they fired her?” August spins to face the larger man. You had said she was fired for employee misconduct and insubordination, but you never gave the specifics. “You know what, I’m not surprised.”
“That’s what I heard from the owner at a house party a week after that, I think. Doesn’t matter. How did you guys find out?”
“The stupid shit sent her a video of them fucking to her, in the same bath tub in the cabin Sy took her to last weekend.” August shakes his head. Little shit couldn’t have even been original.
“And he’s still breathing?” Geralt looks surprised.
“For now. But when I see him….” August’s hands curl into fists at his side and he almost starts shaking. Geralt gives a hum and then pats his back, turning to leave his friend to stew in his feelings and planning a nice phone call to the beautiful bartender with a broken heart at home.
Shaking the memory from his mind, August opens the bedroom door to see you curled into Sy’s chest, shoulders shaking but no noise coming from you. Only the vision of the bright hand print on Mikey’s face calms his rising anger. He hears Walter in the bathroom and the shower turning on. Sy finally notices him and makes eye contact. It was almost a telepathic conversation between the two men: our baby needs us.
August turns to his left as Walter walks in, steam following him from the running shower. Sy nudges you up with murmurs of needing to calm down. You grudgingly obey, make eye contact with August before quickly looking away and following them to the shower. August takes this chance to change the sheets, rolling his eyes when he sees the crumbs on the comforter. He’d told them time and again not to let you eat in bed, but they never listen. He’ll let it slide this time, given current circumstances.
After fixing the bed and taking the breakfast down to the kitchen, he starts on the dishes. You had expressed only once that it was your least favorite chore, and he had taken it upon himself to be the designated dishwasher of your group. Despite the shower running upstairs, the water was still scalding and he thanked Walter once again for finally caving and buying a new hot water heater and for Sy saving them money by installing it himself. The burning pain from the water distracted him from the heartbreak he felt coming from you. You always joked you had a radiating energy that affected those around you, but he didn’t think it was a joke.
When he first saw you, you shined so brightly you almost glowed. Your smile was like a beaming ray of sunlight, sending warmth straight through his heart. At first he thought he was dying, that you were an angel of some sort that had shown up to take him to his after life. But one look at Sy and Walter and he knew he wasn’t alone. Bringing you into their lives was like having eternal summer. And now Mikey had gone and shut your light off. He was lucky he was kicked out.
As soon as everything was dried and put away, August made his way upstairs where Sy was carrying you out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel. Walter followed behind with a brush and some lotion in hand. They met eyes for a moment before moving to sit beside you and Sy on the bed. Sy had you his lap sideways, rocking back and forth while you controlled your breathing. He let you cry in the shower until your breathing turned ragged and he recognized the onset of a panic attack setting in. Walter starts brushing your hair while August takes the lotion and starts rubbing your feet. Soon your breathing evens out and the sniffling quiets.
All three men watch you and you make eye contact with August. He gives you a small smile and brings your ankle up to his mouth for a kiss. His mustache tickles your skin and you pull it back with a small shriek. This causes all three men to chuckle.
“Are you okay, Kitten?” August mumbles. Walter and Sy turn to you pointedly. You hadn’t said anything to them since you ran away from Mikey. They knew you weren’t okay, but they needed you to open up to them so they could help.
“Not really.” you whisper. Your hand still stings from slapping Mikey, but even more so your chest hurts. It feels irrational to you. You have three gods in front of you, ready and willing to worship you, and you’re heartbroken over someone you knew was going to hurt you from the beginning. “I think I’m more pissed than anything. What if this ruins what we have? I don’t want to be here around him but that means I won’t be able to be with you guys as much.”
Sy burst out laughing. You look at him offended, only to catch the amusement on August’s face as well. You turn around to look at Walter and find him chuckling.
“What the fuck is so funny?” you almost yell. August rubs his hand along your naked thigh, bringing your attention down to him.
“Kitten, if you think we’re going to let that little twerp ruin one of the best things to happen to us, you must not hold us in too high of a regard.” he looks at you pointedly.
“Yeah, Sugar. You got me fucked up if you think I’m going to throw you away because of this. If anything, it’s Mikey that’s going in the trash.” Sy says with a smirk. You look at him tentatively, and he gives you his wink/blink. You give him a smile when you feel Walter kiss the top of your head. You look up to make eye contact with your furry lover.
“Besides, I kicked Mikey out,” he says. You immediately sit upright in Sy’s lap, scrambling to stand and look at Walter full on. You bring your hands to your hips, causing the towel to fall and you rush to catch it.
“What do you mean you kicked him out? Don’t cause issues with your family because of me, Walter, that’s crazy.” He just smiles at you. It isn’t fair how pretty he is, how pretty all three of them are. You shouldn’t be jealous because your boyfriends have prettier eyelashes than you do. He reaches for you, bringing you between his legs, spreading them wide to make room for your thick thighs.
“It’s only for a few days, Love. Give him some time to think about what he did and for all of us to cool down.”
“No promises on that last one,” August grumbles. Sy gives a hum of agreement.
“Regardless,” Walter starts, giving a pointed look to the other two men, “even if Michael is here, you still have every right to be in this house. Or we can start spending more time at your place. We can work around this, love.” He grabs your hands in his and brings you close to him. “We love you, Y/N.” he whispers. Tears start to fill your eyes.
“Yeah, Sugar. Sure, your apartment is small and crowded, and you have all those pretty rocks I’m too scared to touch,” Sy starts in, making you giggle.
“They’re called crystals, Sy.” you mumble.
“Whatever, they’re part of your little witchy shit and sets me on edge. But I wouldn’t be anywhere else, cause I love ya.”
“Aww you guys,” you say as the tears really start to flow. You look to August, waiting for him to take his turn to confess his feelings. He just rolls his eyes.
“All this sappy shit. Yes, I love you. This is probably the only time you’ll hear me say it out loud, so soak it up while you can,” he grumbles. You bend down and give him a kiss on his pouting lips.
“I love you, too.” you whisper as you move away from him.
“All of you. I didn’t want to get too close at the beginning because I didn’t want to have to choose between you three, but thank god you suggested this. I know I’m going to be a little down in the coming time, but I appreciate each of you and everything you do for me as a team and as individuals. I don’t know where I’d be without you guys.”
All three men wrap their arms around you like some kind of awkward python of arms and hair. You run one hand through Walter’s hair and the other down August’s back. Sy buries his face in your chest, and you send thanks to the divine universe for the beautiful men it has sent you.
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Mikey pulls up to his friend Evan’s house, aware of the gloom cloud hanging above his head. He’d called him as soon as he pulled out of the driveway at Walter’s, giving as little details as possible as to why he needed a place to crash. Evan was a great friend, but he didn’t need any more judgment today. He was already dreading calling his mother. How was he going to explain to her that he cheated on his girlfriend that he was sharing with his three older cousins? Up until today he wasn’t even sure it WAS cheating. I mean, you had the other three, why couldn’t he fuck other people too?
But then a memory arises in his mind. It had only been a couple months since you had met him and the other three men, and you were freaking out in the cooler at work. It had taken him five minutes to get you calmed enough to tell him what had you in such a state. When you finally confessed that you had caught feelings for him and his cousins, and that you didn’t want to choose between them, he had the best idea. That night he mentioned a poly relationship to August and Sy, unknowing of his cousin’s history of sharing women. When he pitched the idea to Walter, the detective was reluctant. But it took one look at your face when they presented the idea to you to convince the bear to cave.
What Mikey wasn’t prepared for was the jealousy he would feel sometimes. It seemed some days that you treated him like he was still a kid, and the nickname Baby Face only made it worse. The way you talked to the older three like they hung the moon, and the way you let them dominate you. It emasculated him, you never let him top you. When he saw MaKenna at a party one night, and she started flirting with him, he felt good. She talked to him like he knew what he was doing, stroking his ego and he felt on top of the world.
Looking back now, he knows he fucked up. He wished he could blame the alcohol, but he knew deep down that wasn’t an excuse.When you agreed to the poly proposal, you had sat everyone down for a deep discussion on the rules of the relationship and how to operate the slippery slope of romance. You had pressed the seriousness of open communication. If anyone was having any issues, it needed to be talked over and worked out. He just couldn’t bring himself to tell you how he was feeling. And now he may have lost you forever.
He looks up from his steering wheel when he hears a tap on his window. Evan stands there, waving a hand to get his attention. He exits the car, avoiding Evan’s questioning gaze as he gathered his things and followed his friend into the house. He sets his bag on the couch, a deep sigh leaving his chest. He hears Evan say something but didn’t pay attention to his words. He sat down and reached into his bag for his computer when he noticed he had packed one of your shirts that must have gotten mixed in with his laundry somehow. He brings it up to his face and takes a whiff. It still smells like you even after going through the wash and he’s surprised to feel the tears burn his eyes.
That’s how Evan finds him when he walks back in from the kitchen with two beers in hand. Mikey wasn’t one to show much emotion outside of excitement and horniness, so to see him crying really threw his friend for a loop.
“Hey, man, you okay?” he sets the two bottles on the coffee table and moves to sit beside Mike. As an EMT he’s used to having to de-escalate a situation, but this was different somehow.
“I cheated on Y/N,” Mike gets out once he calms down. Evan raises his brows in surprise. He couldn’t lie and say he was shocked. He knew exactly the kind of guy Mike was and exactly the woman you were. He told Mike once that he thought he was too immature for someone like you. You were a grown ass woman, not the little girls Mikey liked to play around with. You had your shit together, a good job and your own place, paid your own bills and never really asked for nor needed help. He had expressed his concerns when Mike had told him you accepted his offer to be shared with his cousins. But alas, Mikey didn’t listen. It took all the willpower Evan had in him not to say ‘I told you so’.
“With who?” he whispered. Getting loud and angry would do his friend no good right now.
“That MaKenna chick, the one you met at the party that one time.” Evan racked his brain, shifting through faces and names. Mike had introduced him to plenty of chicks over the last two years of their friendship.
“Is she the little redhead that worked at the bar with Y/N? The one who got fired for fucking a customer on the clock?”
“Is that why they fired her?” Mikey looked up.
“Yeah, man. My brother was there that night, said she ran out of the bar screaming and cussing everyone out. She may have also been drinking on the job.” Fuck, he had alot of apologizing to do.
“Look, I’m your friend, and as your friend it’s my responsibility to tell you when you fucked up. And I love you, bro, but you’re fucking stupid. What was going through your head, man?”
Mike wanted to be offended, but somewhere deep inside he was glad to have a friend who called him out on his shit.
“I don’t know, man. We were at this party and I was drinking and Y/N has been so busy with work and caught up in the other guys that it just felt like I didn’t exist anymore, ya know? And then when we do have sex, she’s always in control. It made me feel….” he trailed off. Evan nods his head, encouraging him to continue.
“I just felt like she saw me as some little kid she could play with, and never took me as seriously as she did them. I wasn’t a man in her eyes. And then MaKenna showed up and I just didn’t think. Now I may have lost her for some community pussy.”
Evan laughed at the last sentence, fully aware the same could be said of Mikey.
“Listen. You stay here for a few days, let her calm down, and figure out your own shit while you’re at it. And maybe get some ice for your face cause brother, she left her mark.” Mikey reaches up and touches his still stinging cheek.
“Leave it, let it be my reminder that I’m an idiot.”
“If you say so, man. But it’s turning purple so better go find some make up at the drug store before people start asking if you’ve been abused.”
*************************************************************************************************************
The next few days flew by in a blur. You’d had picked up extra shifts just to keep your mind focused on work and not Mikey. The three older men never really let you have a moment to yourself. If you were at work, they were sat at the very end of the bar. If you were at home, you had at least one wrapped around you and another lurking somewhere in the house. You didn’t mind, really. You had done enough crying over Mike. You, however, didn’t let them see the anxiety eating at you as the days drew closer to Mikey coming back to the house. Walter had tried to reassure you that everything would be fine, but you knew it would be so awkward. Sy had offered to move in with you, to which August protested that there wouldn’t be enough room because he’d be damned if he wasn’t moving in too. You let them bicker for an hour before shutting down the idea in general.
Sy had made sure August had taken you out for the day when Mikey had finally come back to the house. He didn’t deserve to even be in your presence. When the younger man walked through the door, Sy had given him a dirty look before going into the kitchen to start on a dinner he had been dying to have you try. Mike just nodded his head in acceptance before moving to lock himself in his bedroom. He was in there for an hour before he heard your laugh coming in through the front door. He had to physically restrain himself from running out to greet you, instead putting on his noise cancelling headphones and closed his eyes, praying for the floor to open up and swallow him whole.
It went on like this for weeks. If he happened to run into you around the house, you would avoid looking at him and run to another room, usually followed by Sy or August. Walter had picked up a new case and had barely been home. If Mike went to the bar with the guys, you would have the other bartender serve him.
Watching Sy and August love up on you was torture. It was like they were being extra affectionate just to tease him, looking right in his eyes when giving you a deep kiss or long hug. The worst was when he would hear you three at night, his room being right under the bed. Your cries of pleasure haunting him in his dreams.
It was getting towards the end of September, the weather was starting to get chilly and his classes were kicking his ass. He had resorted to moving in with Evan just so he could sleep. Walter had finally convinced you to move in, despite the tension between you and Mike. It hadn’t been an easy fight.
“Walt, baby, I really don’t think it’s a good idea. I still can’t even talk to him, living here is just going to make it worse.” you protest. It was on a rare night that he had come home from work and all three men had taken their turn ravishing you to exhaustion. You lay naked on your back in the middle of the bed, Sy half asleep with his face on your chest, August getting water and snacks in the kitchen, and Walter standing in the doorway to the bathroom towel drying his hair.
“But your lease is coming up, baby, and they’re going to raise your rent. What are you going to do, if you can’t renew it and can’t afford it?” Sy whispers against your breast.
“I can find another apartment, Sy.”
“Besides, Mike moved in with his friend, Evan.” If it wasn’t for Sy’s heavy body keeping yours pinned to the bed, you would have sat straight up.
“When?” you ask.
“A couple days ago. Said he couldn’t stand being in this house anymore, he couldn’t sleep.”
You both turn when you hear August coming up the stairs with his arms full. You took note of your favorite cookies and some waters. He takes one to Walter, before moving to sit on your other side and feeding you a bite of cookie.
“I just hope this doesn’t cause any problems with you guys and his mom…” you trail off. Walter had told you about Liza’s phone call when Mike told her what happened. You knew your boys probably got an earful, but eventually she came to understand her son was the one in the wrong. That still didn’t save them from the scolding over the idiocracy of their poly relationship.
They didn’t care though. It wasn’t her relationship, therefore her opinion didn’t matter.
“Liza will get over it. You, my dear, are OUR priority. Mikey moved out of his own freewill and you need a place to live. You can have Mikey’s old room, if you’re worried about losing a space to call your own.” Tears come to your eyes. God, you love them so much.
“Yeah, you can put all your witchy shit in there,” Sy says. All of you just laugh and carry on with your night.
August and Sy had helped you pack your apartment and, with a little help from Geralt, who had recently started spending time with your little group, had moved you in with your polycule. You sold most of your furniture aside from your dressers and mattress. Walter had even set up a space around the house for your cat, happy to have a free mouse catcher for when the rodents invaded during the snowy months. Everything was going great, you had your boys, work was banging so you had some extra cash in your pocket. Soon the sting from Mikey’s betrayal ebbed away to a dull throb.
It was mid-October when shit really hit the fan. The band at work was super popular around the local community and everyone was getting lit. Your boss had given you the night off per your request, but you just couldn’t seem to stay away from work, even off the clock. You had dressed up extra nice tonight, donning an outfit that showed off all your goodies. Sy and August had been to the barber a few days before and looked so yummy. Walter had opted to take the night and spend time with Faye during her time off for fall break. You had invited Geralt but he said the loud noises would mess with his sensitive ears.
After grabbing drinks and saying hi to your friends in the band, you take a seat at a table with the guys, talking to some regulars and friends. The night was going great, for at least an hour. Until Mikey walked in. Just seeing him pissed you off again. You made eye contact for just a split second before turning away, giving him the cold shoulder. Nothing gets past your two soldiers though, and both men clock onto their younger cousin making his way through the crowd. Sy slings one arm around your shoulders and August moves to block you into the booth, stuck between the two beefcakes. You keep your face forward, your focus solely on the band.
‘Fuck she looks good’ Mikey thinks. You had put on his favorite teddy, tits pushed almost to your chin, tucked into a pair of jeans so tight they might as well have been painted on. Your hair was curled and wild, and your make up was done in his favorite style. He missed the nights of watching the mascara run down your face from choking on his….. He shakes his head, starting to regret coming out tonight. One of your coworkers had told him you had taken the night off, and he was in the mood to drink himself stupid. He hadn’t spent a night sober since he moved out. He can’t even self pleasure any more, the guilt killing his sex drive. He refused to look at women. Not when the one he wanted was so close yet so far away. He tries ignoring the glares being sent to him from Sy and August. They hadn’t forgiven him for his mistake. To be honest, he hadn’t exactly forgiven himself.
When the band goes on break, you extract yourself from your loving bodyguards to go to the restroom. Locking yourself in the large stall, you turn your back to lean against the wall, taking a deep breath, before doing your thing and leaving the bathroom. You sneak out the door to the back patio quickly, before Sy or August can see you. You loved them deeply, but the past couple weeks they have been a tad overbearing. You move past all the smokers and into the back parking lot, taking in the cold air, letting it freeze/burn your lungs.
The healing you had done the past few weeks seemed to fly out the window at seeing him again. You missed him. You hated it, but you missed him so much. The stupid faces he would make when you were in a bad mood. The puppy dog eyes he would give you when asking for a bite of your food. The way he vigorously rubbed his face in your chest when he was tired and acting like a toddler. The memories cause tears to sting your eyes, and you put your fingers under your eyes to keep your makeup from running.
A cough from behind brings you back to the present, turning to find Mikey standing behind you. He had his head down, rubbing the back of his neck and scuffing his foot on the ground. It pleased and pained you to see him looking so rough. He was always pale, but his skin was almost gray. His hair looked like it hadn’t been washed in days and his clothes were rumpled. He looked like shit, and you loved it and hated it in a strange emotional paradox.
“Hey,” you whisper, and your heart breaks all over again. The circles under his eyes wouldn’t have been covered by the best concealer in the world. You just want to pull him into you and love every ounce of pain out of his eyes. But he broke your trust and you have to stand your ground.
“Hi,” he whispers back. It’s tense for a moment, and you’re wishing you would have snuck your pack of smokes into your purse without August seeing. All of them knew you had your vices, but August was adamant about breaking this specific bad habit. As if reading your mind, Mikey hands you a cigarette, and you take it with a quiet ‘thank you’. He lights it for you, and you both look each other in the eye before turning away again.
“Mikey-”
“I-”
You both speak at the same time, before smiling softly at each other. You motion for him to start first, anxious to hear what he has to say.
“I just wanted to say I’m sorry. What I did was wrong and I really hurt you. Nothing can excuse what I did, but if it’s any consolation, I feel like shit,” he clears his throat, and avoids eye contact with you.
“You look like shit,” you huff. He throws his head back and barks a laugh. His shoulders shake and you know it’s not because he finds anything funny.
“Thank you, Sweetcheeks.” You smile at his nickname.
“Seriously, Mikey, are you okay? You look like you haven’t seen the sun in weeks.”
“No, babes, to be honest I’m not. I can’t sleep without drinking half a bottle a night, I don’t think I’ve had a solid meal in two weeks, and my sex drive is completely gone. Hell, I can’t even masturbate!” The more he talks, the more manic he sounds until he shouts that last sentence, drawing the eyes of some customers walking by. You slap your hand to your face to hide from embarrassment.
“Sorry. But yeah, I’m not okay. But I brought this on to myself,” he mumbles. You would disagree, but you can’t. He made his decision, now he can lay in the bed he made.
“You look great, though. They must be taking good care of you,” he says almost bitterly.
“Yes, they are. I’m actually using your old room as an art studio.”
“Wow. That’s great.” You just nod your head. And then it really processes in your head, and you can’t help the petty happiness that fills you at the thought of him not being able to get it up. Your face must give away how you’re feeling.
“What?” Mikey asks.
“Would it be shitty of me to say it pleases me immensely that your dick isn’t working right now?” Now Mikey really laughs, from deep in his belly and full of mirth. You start laughing with him, and when you make eye contact, it only seems to amuse you further. Soon you both are wiping tears and holding your stomachs.
“No, babe, I wouldn’t fault you at all for taking pleasure in my pain. Matter of fact, if my suffering makes you happy, I will do it gladly.” You roll your eyes at his cheesiness, but damn it if that wasn’t what made you fall in love with him to begin with.
“I can admit I miss you, too, Mikey. But don’t think that this simple conversation is going to make everything magically better. You have a lot of trust to build back up, and not just with me.” You warn him. His eyes light up, and like a trick of the shadows around you, his skin almost seemed to glow back to life.
“I’ll do whatever you want, Sweetcheeks. I promise, I won’t so much as LOOK at another woman. You won’t regret this.” His body jerks forward, arms open to hug you before he hesitates. You open your arms in acceptance, ready to move past this awkwardness and be with your Mikey again. After a long few minutes of just soaking in each other after weeks apart, you move back and wipe your eyes once more. A gust of wind blows around you and sends a shiver over your naked shoulders and back.
“Let’s get you inside, Sweetcheeks,” Mikey says, shrugging off his zip up jacket and throwing it over your shoulders. You both move to go back inside just as the door opens and August and Sy come barreling out. August glares at the cigarette still in your hand while Sy shoots a dirty look at Mike’s jacket around you.
“Uh oh, Mikey, we should probably put out the smokes. Here comes Captain Killjoy and Agent Sourpuss,” you giggle.
“Careful, Sweetcheeks, they’re likely to punish you,” he jokes back. Two sets of cerulean eyes study you and Mikey closely. August looks ready to murder the younger man, while Sy just looks confused.
“So what’s going on here?” the bull grumbles.
“Mike and I have had a conversation, and he has apologized,” you start slowly. You’re unsure just how well they will react to this news.
“So one little ‘I’m sorry’ and he’s just forgiven?” August seethes. You take a deep breath. You love your Scorpio man, but Lord did he test you.
“It’s not all magically fixed, no. We still need to have a very long talk, and it’s going to take a lot of work, but for right now, tonight, we are going to leave the past in the past, let go of any grudges,” you look pointedly to both men, “and go enjoy our friend Alex’s singing and eat some good food because you,” you turn to Mikey, “are skin and bones. Am I clear?”
You had used what you call your ‘mom voice’, leaving no room for argument. All three men follow you back into the bar, Mikey sitting by the wall and letting you lock him into the booth. Things were going well until SHE walked in. That redheaded little hussy. It was a good thing Sy listened to you when you told him to keep you away from the whiskey. The last thing you needed was to go to jail tonight. None of the guys seemed to have noticed, so you chose to ignore it.
At the next intermission, Mikey decided he’d take the opportunity to get another round for the table. You kept your eyes stuck to him the entire time, launching yourself from the booth when you see MaKenna walk up to Mikey. He glances at her before looking around the room nervously. Sy and August follow but stay a few feet away. You sidle up to Mikey and wrap an arm around his waist and using the other hand to bring his face down to yours and sealing a deep kiss to his lips. You open your mouth and make a show of mingling your tongue with Mike’s, letting this bitch know he’s yours. Mikey follows you as you pull away, whining low in his throat when you break the kiss. You then turn to the girl beside you.
“Oh, hi. I forgot you existed,” you say. She’s looking between you and Mikey, very confused.
“I didn’t know you and Mike were dating,” she says. You narrow your eyes at her, knowing she was lying. She knew damn well what she did.
“MaKenna was just trying to hook up with me again. I was just telling her no,” Mikey rushed to tell you. The last thing he needed after making up with you was you thinking he hadn’t changed. The only acknowledgement you give him is a hum and a nod.
“Yeah, after he fucked you he realized he needed a real woman. I’m surprised you even have the guts to show up here after being fired the way you were. You really must feel no shame,” the venom dripping from your tongue could kill a horse, but damn if it wasn’t sexy. Mikey was trying so hard to hide the tightening in his jeans.
“I don’t know what you mean,” the smaller female starts.
“Oh, please. You got caught fucking another woman’s man, again, on the clock. And when his girlfriend showed up to kick your ass, it caused drama that didn’t need to be started here at work. You think you would have learned from that, but apparently you have no sense of self-preservation. I suggest you start looking for something safe to do, because I won’t be as nice as the last girl. You got lucky a bouncer was able to convince her not to knock your teeth in, but the bouncers here love me and would highly encourage it. So find someone else to fuck with, before that butterface of yours gets permanently damaged.”
All three of your boys groan. Seeing you so riled up was so hot, and they knew hearing you threaten someone shouldn’t have been as sexy as it was. The girl in front of you flinches before walking away from you. You close your eyes and take a deep breath through your nose. You’re typically not a confrontational person, but it felt so good to put someone in their place. And to do it without laying a hand on her.
“That was hot as fuck,” Mikey says behind you. You chuckle, turning back to flash him a flirty smile before grabbing his hand and moving to go grab the other two. The lust you see in August’s eyes sets you aflame. Sy just looks giddy, like a child. He knows exactly what’s about to happen. After grabbing your things and saying your goodbyes, feeling smug as you watch MaKenna move around the bar to avoid you. You pay out your tabs, leaving generous tips for the bartender and leaving with promises to fill her in on all the dirty details later. Gossip makes the work shift go by faster and Monday night was gonna be a HOT, tea party.
You almost run to Sy’s truck, August following closely behind to his car parked in the next spot over. Sy barrels past his cousin and quickly grabs you, turning you around and grabbing your cheeks in both hands. He tilts your head back and stares deeply into your eyes.
“I hate every bitch that isn’t you, you absolute fucking goddess.” he rumbles. The absolute desire radiating from his bulky form affecting the other two men. You giggle almost manically as he kisses you sloppily. You can taste the Jack he’s been drinking all night. He smacks his lips when he pulls away, reaching down to slap your ass before turning and climbing into his Chevy. August chuckles at his cousin’s antics, turning and unlocking his car. Mikey opens the door to the truck for you, helping you in by pushing under your asscheeks. It’s almost like your lovers had an obsession or something.
August eyes the actions closely, still suspicious of his younger cousin’s motives. Mikey catches his eye and looks down to the ground. You notice and give August a pointed look that said ‘stop it’. He couldn’t help it. It was his job to protect you, even from emotional pain. You stare even harder until he softens his expression.
“August, do you mind giving Mike a ride back home with us?” you say so sweetly it almost rotted his teeth. He huffs at you and you give him the bedroom begging eyes. The same eyes you give him when……. God damn it. You really knew how to get under his skin. He rolls his eyes to try to hide just how much you affect him.
“Fine. See you back at the house.” Mike hesitated, but moved when you poked him in the ribs and motioned for him to get in the car before shutting yourself in the truck, kicking your feet up on the dash. The Chevy rumbles to life and Sy peels out, leaving a trail of smoke in the parking lot. August rolls his eyes at the unnecessary display of masculinity. ‘Dumb country boy’.
The ride is silent and awkward, Mike fidgeting with his hoodie strings and bouncing his legs. August kept his focus on the road, ignoring the anxiety vibrating off the younger man. Ten minutes felt like an eternity. When they pulled in the drive, Mike finally felt like he could breathe. Sy had just turned off the truck when August put the car in park. You hopped out of the driver’s side, hair sticking out sideways and your lipstick smudged. Sy follows, mouth and cheeks red from your make out session. August rolls his eyes.
“Impatient asshole.” Sy just shoots him a smug smile. You giggle and reach up to kiss your agent, knowing he was just grumpy cause Sy got to have you first. He hums in satisfaction as you pull away, picking you up and walking you into the house. You take note of Walter’s car parked in the garage and try to wiggle out of August’s arms to go greet your other lover. Mike follows hesitantly, hands deep in his pockets and dragging his feet on the ground. The past several times he’s been in this house hasn’t exactly been pleasant.
August finally relents and lets you down. As soon as your feet hit the floor you’re on your way up the stairs, almost tripping in your haste. A strong arm wraps around your waist to catch you, and you mumble a thank you without looking at who it is and continuing your way up to the detective. He’s laying in bed with a case file in his hand, one arm behind his head. His hair is wet and he’s only in boxers. He looks up when you come in through the door, eyes light and a flush in your cheeks.
“You’re home early, and it looks like you had a good time. You’ve been absolutely ravished” You climb onto the bed, the alcohol finally catching up to you.
“I did! Mikey apologized and came home with us. Sy is at fault for the ruined lipstick.” The detective raises his brows in surprise.
“That’s great, Love.” he says, getting distracted by the three men filing into the room behind you. He makes eye contact with the youngest man, giving him a nod in greeting. Mike nods back, at least Walter isn’t as intimidating as August.
“And then that bitch showed up at the bar, that’s why we came home early,” you growl. Walter looks confused before Sy happily clarifies. The detective thought it odd his cousin was so excited to relay the news that the girl who Mike had cheated on you with had shown up to ruin your night.
“She tried hooking up with me again. Sweetcheeks, I didn’t tell you about her flirting with me so you would threaten her.” Mike explains. Walter raises his brows further and looks at you pointedly. Sometimes you forget he’s actually a cop.
“I didn’t threaten her! I told her she needed to find something safe to do, that’s just giving good advice.” you grumble.
“And it was so sexy when she did it.” Sy exclaims. Well, that explains that. You flush at the praise, tingles running down your spine. Walter chances a look at August, and the memory of you, the deadly venom in your tone, as you threatened the smaller girl just fed the flames. The lust in the agent’s eyes and the giddiness from Sy sparks something in Walter as well. You quickly catch on to the energy change in the room, biting your lip and making eye contact with each man. Mikey is unsure, though. You had just forgiven him for sleeping with someone else. Would you even want him to touch you? You notice his hesitation, beckoning him forward with a crook of your finger. He knows that look, and he’s happy to let you be in charge again.
He kneels at the foot of the bed, hands laid flat on his thighs, head down in submission. You hum in satisfaction, crawling to get closer to him, ass in the air and hips swaying back and forth. You hear a chorus of groans ring around the room, but keep your focus on the boy in front of you.
“Poor Mikey. He confessed to me earlier that he’s been having trouble getting it up here lately, boys.”
“Serves him right,” August spits. You want to roll your eyes at the hostility, but know that would only lead to a paddling later.
“But he’s apologized, Auggie. It’s time to move past it, don’t you think he’s suffered enough?” It took Mike a moment to remember the dynamic at play here. You submitted to August, and he submitted to both of you. He could only imagine the hell he had coming in his near future.
“By the universe, sure. But I think you have been too lenient on him, Kitten.”
“Agreed.” That comes from Sy. You turn behind you to look at Walter, who gives his nod in agreement to the other two.
“So what do you suggest I do?” Sy shrugs.
“That’s up to you, Sugar. You’re in charge here.” You contemplate for a moment before an idea pops into your head. Mike gulps as he watches a sinister smile bloom across your lipstick smeared mouth. The deviant look in your eyes lets him know he’s in for a long night.
“Your punishment, Baby Face, is to look but not touch.”
Oh yeah, he’s well and truly fucked.
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You flop back onto the bed, gasping for breath and covered in sweat. Sy groans beside you, just as sweaty and breathless. Walter leans his back against the headboard, and August and Mikey are curled together on your naked thighs. One solid hour of sex and passion had sobered you up. As the endorphin high slowly subsides, you move to get up, attempting to extract yourself from the pile of skin and hair and sweat.
“And where do you think you’re going?” Sy grumbles.
“I have to pee, let me up.” you grumble. August and Mike groan as they move off you, Walter giving you a hand to keep your balance as you stand on the mattress and maneuver your way off the bed and to the bathroom. You start the shower, not enjoying the sticky feeling of sweat and cum drying on your skin. Once deemed warm enough, you step under the spray and the let water wash over you.
You close your eyes and turn to wash your face. Now sober, and in a post-nut clarity state of mind, you think about Mikey and just how easily you gave into him tonight. The boys were right, you were too lenient. You said you needed to talk, but what would you say? You had already told him he hurt you, and that was still needing to be further discussed, but you also wanted to know why. You let out a deep sigh and run a hand down your face.
You flinch when you feel an arm wrap around you, turning to find Walter giving you a worried look. You give him a small smile, turning back into the water to finish scrubbing the make up from your face, before turning to grab your body wash. He stops you, grabbing the soap and your loofah before gently starting to wash your chest. You hum, closing your eyes and leaning back to let the water flow through your hair.
“What were you thinking about, Love?” Walter asks softly, causing you to open your eyes.
“Mikey, and the talk we all need to have.” you whisper. “Just don’t know how I want to go about it.”
“You want to talk it through with me? Help process your thoughts before going in blind?” you huff a laugh out of your nose, before nodding.
“I want to know why he did it, but at the same time, I’m scared to really find out.” He nods his head, putting his hands on your shoulders to turn you so he can start washing your back.
“I’m also confused on how to get over the hurt. The anxiety and that little voice whispering in my ear that he’s going to do it again.” You feel him hum as he starts to massage your shoulders, releasing the knots in your neck.
“Unfortunately, my dear, that little voice may never go away. But Michael put that voice there, and if he’s truly sorry and serious about being with you again, he will work very hard to chase that little voice away.” You nod, understanding what he’s saying, and you appreciate his wisdom, but it does little to ease the heaviness in your chest. Your thoughts are interrupted when Sy burst into the shower.
“Y’all are having a party in here and didn’t invite me?’ he says, fake offense on his bearded face. You chuckle and roll your eyes.
“It’s a shower therapy session, Captain. Just working through some thoughts and feelings.” He raises his eyebrows, not expecting that retort.
“Well, make room. I need to wash off.” he pushes into the small space. Walter grunts while you giggle, rinsing the last of the soap off and slipping out of the shower and grabbing a towel. You can hear the two men in the shower bickering but pay no mind as you make your way to the bedroom to steal one of Walter’s sweaters. You take note that the bedsheets have been removed and the other two men are no longer in the room.
After drying off and getting dressed in the sweater, some panties, and knee high socks to keep your legs warm, you move to go downstairs where you knew August would be putting together after care snacks. Walter and Sy are leaving the bathroom as you head to the bathroom door, stopping to give them both a kiss before leaving the room and going downstairs.
As you had predicted, August was in the kitchen, pajama bottoms hanging off his delectable hips, putting together sandwiches and juice. Sometimes you think he took the nickname “Daddy” too seriously. You look to your right to see Mike in the laundry room, pulling out clean bedsheets and a bigger comforter. This leaves you puzzled, Mikey never did chores. As if he can read your thoughts, he looks up and gives you a sheepish smile.
“Just trying to help out.” he mumbles. You just nod your head, your brain still trying to compute what it was seeing. You must have looked like a SIM, just standing there staring. You snap back into reality when August clears his throat, giving you a look of confusion.
“Yes, Daddy?’ you say. It was almost instinctual at this point to call him that at home. He just simply smirks, before grabbing your hand and moving you to sit at the kitchen island in front of a plate of food. You start to salivate at the sight of a sandwich and fruit. He puts a bottle of water beside the plate before kissing your forehead and moving to put together plates for everyone else.
You munch quietly on your fruit, mind going back to the conversation you’re going to have to have with your four boys. Walter and Sy were easy to talk to, giving you the space to freely and safely speak about how you feel. The strength that radiates from them giving you a sense of peace, leaving you unafraid of your feelings. You didn’t have to tell August what was on your mind. He had an uncanny ability to guess how you’re feeling most times. ‘You can’t control your face, Baby Girl.’
You lift your head up from your snack when you hear Walter and Sy come thundering down the stairs. Both are dressed just as August, leaving you in a sea of man titties and hair. This is the closest to Heaven you will ever get and you can die a happy woman secure in that knowledge. Immediately Sy goes to a plate of food, grumbling a thank you to August in between bites. Walter takes a plate and sits beside you on a stool. August and Sy are standing against it on the opposite side, and you see Mikey shuffle his feet to your other side.
“Guys, we need to talk.” you say. Walter doesn’t react, August and Sy just blink, but you feel Mikey tense up beside you. He knew it was coming still. He just didn’t think you would do it so quickly after what just happened upstairs. He hadn’t even thought about what he was going to say to the other guys. Hell, you didn’t know how to even begin. Now that you’re thinking about it, this probably should have been a one on one talk with Mikey.
“I know that things aren’t going to be the way it was before,” you start. You don’t have to clarify what you meant by before. Just that word alone is enough to drive a knife through Mikey’s heart. You didn’t look at him directly, but he knew you were talking to him. The three older men stay quiet, letting you get what you need to off your chest. August’s sharp attention to detail doesn’t fail to notice the sweat starting to bead on Mikey’s forehead. You take a deep breath, steeling yourself for what you are about to ask.
“Why, Mikey?” your voice cracks, pushing your plate away and looking up at him with tears in your eyes. A lump formed in his throat and he didn’t know what to say for a minute. He didn’t know how to tell you it was because he felt like less of a man in your eyes compared to the other three. How could he tell you he was insecure and emotionally immature and he doesn’t want you to look at him with pity.
“I…” he voice cracks. You raise your brows, anticipating his answer.
“Was it something I did? Something I said?” you croak. This pisses Sy off.
“Don’t go blaming yourself, Darlin’. Mike made the decision to do what he did, no matter what you did or said to him,” he almost barks. You turn to him, seeing his face and chest starting to turn red with anger. You just nod, making eye contact with August who just gives a nod in agreement. You turn back to Mikey.
“He’s right. I could have just talked to you about what I was feeling.”
“What were you feeling?’ Walter asks. If he could get Mikey talking about it, the sooner it unburdens you.
“Emasculated, ignored,” he mumbles. “I just, you call me Baby Face, and it made me feel like you see me as a kid, not a man like these three,” he motions to the others.
“That’s because you are a kid,” Sy grumbles. You turn and give him a pointed look, telling him to shut the fuck up with your eyes.
“He’s right, Baby Cakes, I am. It took me moving out and doing some self-reflection, to realize I’m not yet a man. Hell, I can’t even grow facial hair yet!” You all chuckle, fully aware of just how virile it makes the other three look. “I just, felt like less of a man. But those weeks apart showed me how little I really know and just how much I still have to learn about being, not just a good man, but a good man for you.” You nod along, listening intently and understanding where he’s coming from.
“I wasn’t aware of just how jealous I was going to feel about sharing you. It was like everytime I wanted alone time with you, one of the others needed you more.”
“That’s understandable, but baby you have to tell me when you’re feeling neglected like that,” you say, reaching out to grab his hand in yours. You bring it up to your mouth for a kiss, before setting it back down on the counter.
“It’s not that hard, really. Pick one night a week when she can be all yours,” that comes from August, face stoic as ever. Mikey wanted to get an attitude, but remembered that he should be taking the advice.
“Or just tell us when you want some one on one time, we’ll give you a couple hours,” Sy says.
“And jealousy is normal, but you gotta talk to me, Mikey,” you say, bringing his attention back to you. “I’m sorry my nickname made you feel that way, I can find other nicknames to call you.”
“You can call me whatever you want, baby. I realized it doesn’t matter, as long as I’m with you.”
“But why her?” you ask. It was bad enough that he cheated, but with someone you had told him made you feel insecure.
“I don’t know. She showed up at a party one night, and some petty part of me wanted to make you feel the same way watching you with them made me feel. It was immature and wrong.” A part of you could understand that. You were young and immature once too, and you could go from pretty to petty with one letter.
“Do you understand what that did to her?” August says. He wants to yell, but the look on your face says he needs to be calm. Mike shakes his head. In all of his self-reflection, he considered he had hurt you but didn’t think to what extent.
“You almost killed her self-esteem. It took me two weeks just to get her to be comfortable with being naked, just with herself. She didn’t leave bed for anything other than work for a month. Hell, Geralt wasn’t able to touch her for a week because she couldn’t stop crying, and you know how he feels about emotions.” Sy says.
“Geralt is coming around?” Mike says.
“That’s not the point,” Walter chimes in.
“Right. Baby, I’m sorry,” Mikey starts. You just shake your head.
“It’s okay. I’m glad you were honest with me. Just, PLEASE, start talking to me about how you feel. Communication is the only way this is going to work,” you have to emphasize the last sentence heavily. He nods his head furiously. You open your arms for a hug, Mikey wrapping his arms around you and squeezing you tightly.
“Though, I do have one request,” he trails off. You hum, waiting to hear what he has to say.
“Can I top you at least twice a week?”
You blink, before bursting out laughing, breaking the hug and leaning back onto Walter as your body shakes. You can feel him laughing behind you, and hear Sy chuckling. August rolls his eyes, typical Mikey.
“Anything you want, Baby Boy. I love you, thanking you for talking to me,” you say, leaning over and giving him a deep kiss. He kisses you back just as lovingly. He pulls back, gazing at you adoringly before turning to his older cousins.
“I’m sorry to you guys, too. I was the one who brought up this whole arrangement not knowing just what it would take to maintain it.”
August just nods, not having fully forgiven him for what he did to you, he couldn’t care less about a slight done to himself. Walter and Sy just mumble “it’s okay.”
“But I want to thank you, too. Thank you for cleaning up my mess and taking the best care of her. I really owe you guys,” he rubs the back of his neck, unsure how they would respond to that.
“Well, we took care of her because we love her, that’s what you do when you love someone, you take care of them,” Walter says. You smile at that, full of love for your big grump.
“And I plan on making it up to her every day.” he looks deep into your eyes, hoping to really drive home his promise. You smile and cup his face, thumb caressing his cheek. He turns and kisses your palm, before putting his hand over yours and lacing your fingers together. The tender moment is broken by your wide yawn. Sy claps his hands.
“Alright, Little Girl, bed time!” he moves around the island to pick you up, never letting you release Mikey’s hand. Sy carries you upstairs, your arm slung over his shoulder to keep your fingers locked with Mike’s. August starts cleaning the kitchen while Walter puts together the bedsheets Mike had dropped when you started your talk. Sy keeps you in his arms as Walter makes the bed, Mike just staring at you, so thankful for your graciousness.
As soon as the bed is finished, Sy lays you gently in the middle, letting Mike take his place by your side in the bed. Just as Walter was going to climb in with you, his phone rings. You groan, knowing a phone call this late can only mean he’s got another lead on his case. He gives you a quick kiss before moving to the closet and answering his phone. As predicted, he gets dressed in jeans and his sweater, pulling his boots on before giving you one more kiss and leaving the bedroom. You hear the door shut downstairs and send up a prayer to any deity that will listen to keep him safe.
You take the usual position, on your back so you can have one on each side and one on top of your chest. Mike is to your left and Sy decides he wants to be in between your legs tonight. August comes into the bedroom, turning off lights before climbing in to your right. Tucked in between three out of the four loves of your life, you drift into the best sleep you’ve had in weeks, surrounded by love and hair.
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Taglist: @just-ten-cents @shellyshellshell @wa-ni @summersong69
#captain syverson x reader#reader insert#captain syverson#walter marshall x reader#mike (hellraiser)#henry cavill fanfic#august walker x reader#henry cavill#reverse harem#fan fiction
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Moth of the Week
African Death’s-Head Hawkmoth
Acherontia atropos
The African death's-head hawkmoth is part of the family Sphingidae and is the most widely recognized of the three species of Death’s-Head Hawkmoth. The species was described in 1758 by Carl Linnaeus. Its common name comes from the skull shape on the back of its thorax. It’s binomial name comes from the river Acheron in Greece, which was believed to lead to the Underworld, and the Greek goddess Atropos respectively.
Description The forewings are black/brown with mottled shades of brown while the hindwings are buff orange with two black/brown stripes that curve with the edge of the hindwing. The head and thorax are the same black/brown color as the forewings interrupted by the brown skull on the back of the thorax. The abdomen is the same buff color as the hindwings with similar stripes of the same color. There is also a single stripe down the center of the abdomen called the “dorsal stripe.”
Average Wingspan: 13 cm (5 in)
Females are large than males with a rounded abdomen tip and larger, thicker antennae
Males have a pointed abdomen tip
Diet and Habitat Larva of this species mainly eat the leaves of potato plants which have alkaloids. The larva accumulate these toxins to become unpalatable to predators. Adults eat the nectar of flowers and stolen honey from the beehives of the Western Honey Bee. They are able to mimic the scent of bees and steal the honey undetected. They use their proboscis, a tube used to drink nectar and honey, to break the honey comb.
Their ranges stretches from the Middle East, as far south as the southern tip of Africa, as far north as southern Great Britain, as far east as India and western Saudi Arabia, and as far west as the Canary Islands and Azores. It is known to move into western Eurasia, but a majority do not survive the winter.
Mating This moth has multiple generations per year. In Africa, the broods are continuous. In the northern range, the larva overwinter in the pupal stage. Eggs are laid singly on the underside of species in mainly Solanaceae but also Physalis, Verbenaceae, Cannabaceae, Oleaceae, Pedaliaceae and others.
Predators This moth can emit a special squeak noise by sucking in air to vibrate a flap in its mouth and throat. The purpose of this squeak is unclear, but the two hypotheses are it is to scare away predators or to mimic the sound of a queen bee makes for the workers to stop moving to easier raid beehives for honey. They are also immune to bee venom and can mimic the scent of bees.
Fun Fact This moth has appeared many times in pop culture as symbols of death and evil:
It appeared in The Hireling Shepherd, Bram Stoker's Dracula, Un Chien Andalou, the promotional marquee posters for The Silence of the Lambs, in the music video to Massive Attack's single, "Butterfly Caught,” and on the American edition's cover of José Saramago's novel Death with Interruptions.
It is mentioned in Susan Hill's Gothic horror novel I'm the King of the Castle and John Keats’s "Ode to Melancholy.”
It is referred to in The Mothman Prophecies.
Finally, the moth is used as a calling card by the serial killer Buffalo Bill. However, in the movie script they are referred to under a different species of death’s-head hawkmoths.
(Source: Wikipedia, Simple English Wikipedia)
#libraryofmoths#animals#bugs#facts#insects#moth#mothoftheweek#lepidoptera#Sphingidae#African death’s-head hawkmoth#Acherontia atropos
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The Double-Emergence of 2024
As you may have heard, there are TWO periodical cicada broods that will emerge between late April and June of this year! This particular combination only happens once every 221 years.
The broods in question are the Illinoian Brood (XIII) and the Great Southern Brood (XIX). The map below is a rough approximation of where sightings are most likely to occur:
There is very little overlap between the broods, so - if you want to experience both - I recommend planning at least two different stops. You should be able to find all seven species by traveling just a few miles north and south of the cities of Springfield, Bloomington, Kankakee, or Beardstown in Illinois, or the city of Mt Pleasant in Iowa.
The University of Connecticut has a handy online guide for identifying all 7 species of periodical cicadas. Note that most species can only be identified by the pattern on their belly. For bonus points, try to find and photograph them all! 😄
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Faerie Book Recommendations🧚✨📚
So reading Sarah J Maas and her very, very shitty interpretation and (under)utilization of fae lore is inspiring me to create a personal list of books I've read that I feel like have like... ACTUAL faeries and folklore in them (not the normal-looking-hot-folks-with-pointy-ears-and-MAYBE-wings brand of faerie SJM popularized), and are actually worth your time
And if you've any books, stories, comics, etc. that you'd want to add to this list, feel free to add them in the comments, reblogs, tags, or my DMs!!
House of Hollow by Krystal Sutherland
Very eerie fairytale vibes that center on the aftermath of the disappearance, and even more mysterious return, of three sisters when one of them goes missing again almost 10 years later. And also the writing is legit just B E A U T I F U L!!!
Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Faeries by Heather Fawcett
This is chock-full of classical faeries and folklore, and almost reads like a textbook about them since this is about a woman, the titular Emily Wilde, traveling to a Scandinavian country to complete her own encyclopedia about the fair-folk. It also features some lowkey cottagecore vibes and an academic rivals-to-lovers romance!
Gilded (Gilded #1) by Marissa Meyer
A retelling of Rumpelstiltskin that reads like its own dark Grimm's fairytale, and it's as eerie and grim as a YA fantasy novel can get. It also centers on themes of telling stories and folktales since the main character, Serilda, is infamous for spinning wild tales - which is what leads to her encounter with the famed, and feared, Earlking (who, as a villain, is so sinister and creepy - and utterly FAE!). Personally, this book wasn't really my cup of tea and I'm unsure if I'll read the sequel, Cursed, however it still has some classic fae vibes that SJM's work lacks, so it deserves a place on this list!
The Changeling by Victor LaValle
I'm using the term 'faerie' very loosely here, as the idea of changelings (and trolls), for me, is more of a narrative device to help us look into grief in fatherhood. But there is still a very strange, vaguely Pans Labyrinth-esque urban fantasy vibe playing in the background throughout!
Slewfoot: A Tale of Bewitchery by Brom
Not necessarily FAERIES but more of mischievous and distrustful woodland folk - and also forest gods. Very heavily steeped in early colonial America era folk horror vibes... if you love media like Robert Eggers' The VVitch then you will ADORE this book! Also Brom's accompanying artwork is so, so beautiful! This is honestly such a perfect fall-time read once Halloween season rolls around.
Legendborn Cycle series by Tracy Deonn
Ok no faeries but... mixes classic Arthurian legends with southern Black beliefs while also telling an epic urban fantasy story centering on themes of grief, trauma, and prejudice. So no fae, but LOTS of great urban fantasy vibes (which I mean... if you're looking for more series to put on your shelf instead of Harry Potter......) Just... Please... just... this series... it's so GOOD!! IDK what else to add that hasn't been said about this series!
Direwood by Catherine Yu
Once again, not necessarily faeries in this book but instead vampires that have a very fae-like quality about them! (as well as blood-hungry butterflies and caterpillars hee-hee) The story as a whole feels like a whimsical fever dream that is STEEPED in tasty Gothic vibes! It sort of has the feeling of being in a late '90s/early '00s Goth music video.
Like Falling Stars by Avalon Roselin (@roselin-books-official)
A story about a girl who's forgotten her past and comes to develop a sweet friendship with a brooding ice faerie prince, and is brimming with so many cozy fantasy vibes!! Also all the fae characters in this novel are so colorful and lively, and they're all very heavily tied to elements and the seasons. Also ALSO!! The main relationship focuses primarily on platonic love as opposed to romantic, and is just as endearing! A perfect cozy winter/fall-time read.
Netvor: A Retelling of Beauty and the Beast by @rosesnwater
Both a completed novel and an in-progress webcomic available to read on Tapas and Webtoons. Again, another story where major themes center on storytelling and fairytales, but also recovering from trauma and grief! There are so, so many classic faerie vibes, and even featuring pinnacle figures from classic fae lore like the Goblin Market, and it manages to feel equal parts nostalgic and unique in its use of faerie lore!
Dandies in Danger podcast by @dandiesindanger
A table-top RPG podcast instead of a novel! It features four queer men that are dragged into a world of fae and horror, all while set against the backdrop of Regency era London. It starts as a VERY eerie fae mystery (featuring figures like Titania and Oberon), but it slowly becomes a dark, horror historical-fantasy, and it's great! Also art by the podcast's creators is so good!
So these are the recs I have to offer for now!! As always, feel free to add more recommendations!!!💛
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for the Poly AU I love the idea of both girls being shy introverted and somewhat dark but I ADORE thinking of the friend being the embodiment of sunlight to contrast their darker nature, like Kindergartens favorite arts and crafts teacher vibes. idk if just makes my heart happy to imagine König laying down in bed, his sun and his moon on each side, both worshiper and worshipped *-*
Now I'm thinking about southern bestie/Kitty as a vibrant arts & crafts teacher 🫠 And wouldn't it be great if she was also a very down to earth country girl, like nothing can get to her, everytime König or Engel or BOTH have a melancholy fit or are brooding about how life is unfair yada yada ya, Kitty emerges like a sunray from the sky and brightens the whole house with her presence 💛
And she has that morbid side, but it's more like "Oh, did I bump into something? Dang it, gotta go look if I need to put down the poor animal with the shovel I have in the trunk…" (after that she drives off to work, whistling as she goes ^_^)
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Look for the Light Chapter 13
- Summary: Aly finds herself trying to escape the Boston QZ. What Aly doesn’t know is Tess is pairing her up with Joel to go on a dangerous mission to find Tommy. Will Aly survive the brooding, moody Joel or will she find herself falling hard for him?
- Tags: Attempted sexual assault, kidnapping, torture, vulgar actions, 18+ MDNI (The next few chapters are very dark so be prepared)
You kept your eyes on Joel’s still body as you rode off through the forest, going north of here. The man that had you strapped around his shoulder was currently holding you down on a black stallion. Your hands were still bound as strong arms held you down, no room to move. You just focused your eyes on the horizon as Joel disappeared from view.
All hope vanished as soon as you couldn’t see him anymore. A stray tear ran down your face at the thought of what could have been. You could’ve still been inside that cabin with Joel, but instead you just had to run off. Thinking it wouldn’t be dangerous. Boy, were you so wrong. Joel would’ve said “I told you so” in that southern accent of his. You wanted to hear those words right now. You’d take him saying that all day long over whatever mess you were in now.
You looked around at the other riders. None of them looked even remotely friendly. They looked exactly like all the average bad guys in old western shows you’d see play on tv. The damsel in distress and the feral kidnappers. All you were missing was the knight in shining armour. That was supposed to be Joel. He should be the one coming to your rescue. He wasn’t coming though. You closed your eyes and focused on deep breaths. Breathing in through your nose and out through your mouth. All you could think about was Joel laying motionless in the thick snow. You choked as a cry got stuck in your throat.
“What are doing back there crying for? Now shut the hell up or I’ll really give you something to cry about,” the tall, muscular man said with a deep laugh in his throat. It made you cringe, and you tried your best to keep quiet. You didn’t know what kind of hell you were about to experience, but you already knew it was going to be bad.
The horses continued galloping for miles. The forest turned into hills as you got closer to the mountain range. Towering, snowy mountains covered each side of the landscape. A shining, clear lake stood in the distance. Its greatness expanding for miles. If you were here on other circumstances you’d say it was beautiful. You were too anxious, too scared to notice all the beauty though. All you could think about was the things these men were going to try to do to you. You cringed and your body tensed up. Anxiety flowing through you at full force.
Minutes later the horses stopped. You looked in front of you and there stood a large lodge. It was two stories tall, over 3,000 sq ft. An American flag stood in front of the building and waved gently in the breeze. The outside was brown and made of strong wood with large windows that reached the entire length of the building. This was more than likely a vacation lodge before the outbreak. You weren’t sure what area of Colorado this was, but you’d figure it out.
“Alright, take her inside to the main room. I’m gonna go find him,” a short, lanky man said to the rough man that held you in place. You didn’t know who him was, but you figured it was the leader of whatever deranged pack this was.
The man hopped off the horse, and you squirmed the best you could to get away from him. You tried to leap off the opposite side of the brilliant horse, but he caught you before you could try. “Don’t even think about it,” he breathed in your face and yanked you off the horse, tossing you over his shoulder again. You tried with all your might to break loose of him, but he was too strong. It was no use. You stopped fighting his grip. You weren’t going anywhere.
He followed the rest of the men into the front doors of the lodge. You gasped when you saw how big and grand it was inside. High ceilings sat feet above you, and a split marble staircase laid in the middle of the room leading up to the second floor. The entryway had an old grand piano and a small check-in desk that sat in the corner.
He continued walking towards the next room. You passed a kitchen area, but didn’t get the chance to look inside. After what seemed like minutes, you finally ended up in the main room that they were talking about. Large windows sat to the right of your view. Two lofty, heavy wooden doors sat in between the windows. There was a large man that stood in front of them, guarding the doors. He had a black suit on and held a shotgun in his hand. He looked forward and had the most intimidating look on his face. You gulped and looked away.
A large wraparound leather couch sat in the far corner of the room, leaving a giant open space in the center of the room. The man holding you finally placed you on the ground while another man undid the cable ties that bound your hands together. Big mistake. As soon as your hands were untied, you made a run for it. Before you got any distance from the men, one man snatched you around the waist and pulled you toward him.
“Now where do you think you’re going?” he said in a sadistic voice. “We wanna have a little fun with you. Isn’t that right boys?” He laughed as he looked around the room at each of the men, a twisted look appearing on his face. You tried to elbow him in the stomach, but he grabbed you tighter. You fought as he moved you over to the corner of the room near a small table that was made of granite. Your feet weren’t carrying you anymore, he was dragging you closer and closer until he stopped in front of it and slammed the side of your face up against the table, your chest smashed against the cold granite. You tried to budge him off you, but he just pushed your face harder into the table.
“Get off me you sick fuck!” you screamed as you lifted a foot and slammed it down onto his. He screamed in pain, but that only made him angrier.
“A girl that likes to talk dirty and fight back? My, that just turns me on more.” Your stomach twisted in knots as he spread your legs apart, positioning his feet in between yours where you couldn’t move your legs. He yanked your purple flannel off and threw it to the ground, securing your arms against the table.
“The boss isn’t going to like this,” another man warned.
“Well, the boss ain’t here right now is he? So let me have a little fun while he’s not in the room. I can get away with just a little.” He had a thick Jersey accent, and every word that came out of his mouth sounded menacing.
The next thing you knew he was grabbing your ass through your jeans. You lifted your left hand and hit him in the stomach, punching behind you as hard as you could. He yelled in pain as he grabbed your arm and threw it on the table, securing your wrist with his hand.
“Tony, get over here and help me!” he yelled as he leaned in closer to you, his hips ramming into you. You groaned as the other man came to assist your assaulter.
“My pleasure,” the other man said as he came around the other side of the table, holding down both your wrists so you couldn’t fight back.
“Let me go!” You screamed in a petrified tone, your voice quivering afraid of what would happen next. This couldn’t be happening. This couldn’t be real.
“Oh, I don’t think so. Not till I have my way with you,” he laughed sadistically into your ear, hot air blowing in. You cringed at how violated you felt. You were completely vulnerable and at the mercy of these pigs in the room. You just wanted to go home. You wanted Joel…
Thoughts of Joel were yanked from your brain by the man that stood behind you. Your skin crawled as he forced his hips up against you. You could feel the growing bulge between his legs, and you almost vomited at the feeling of it. Tears burned at the backs of your eyes as you leaned over that table completely helpless while every single man in the room watched. Some of the other guys egged him on, cheering with every touch he stole from you. You felt the table become wet under your face as the tears flowed down silently. You felt like you were in one of those dreams where you were screaming for help, but no one could see or hear you. You were drowned out by all the other noises happening in the room.
He forcefully pulled your hair and put his lips right up against your ear. “Now you’re going to take me like a good girl, and you’re not going to fight me. You have no way of doing that anyways. Little miss helpless crying her eyes out on the table while I have my way with her. Isn’t that so tragic for you,” he pulled your hair harder, forcing your head up then slamming it back against the table. You winced in pain at the sharp force against your head. The man started laughing mentally and all the other men followed after him.
You felt as if you were stuck in a sick, twisted horror movie just like Hostile. “Stop!” you yelled again in defense. Your calves cramping up at the position you were standing in.
“You want me to stop?” he taunted you. A slow building laugh rumbled out from his throat, building into a wheeze as he coughed from laughing too much. “Honey I’m gonna have you screaming my name before I stop,” he spat in your ear.
Fear ran through you as he shoved a hand in your jeans. You tried to squeeze your legs and throw him off, but that just made him hold on tighter. Your legs started shaking as he took his hand and slowly slipped underneath the cloth material of your underwear. You cringed and squeezed your eyes shut, praying that it’d be over soon. You were beyond vulnerable in the position you were in now. The man had complete power over you, dominating you with full force in his touch.
“Now who’s the helpless one?” he said as he shoved his hand down further, finding your folds fast. Your whole body started trembling as the invasive hands explored your forbidden area. Tears clouded your vision as a wave of nausea hit you so hard you thought you’d topple over and crumble. You were in a sea of men that were getting off to the mere sight of a helpless girl writhing in pain before them. You felt like you were on full display for all of them to toy with. Would the man across from you try the same thing next? You wanted to melt into the floor and disappear from existence.
“This one’s just because I want to make you as uncomfortable as possible, princess,” he hissed into your ear. He repositioned his hand lower, taking his two fingers and finding your entryway, about to shove up inside you. You closed your eyes and waited for the torture, wanting it to be over already.
You heard a voice being cleared as low footsteps sounded across the wooden floors. Before he could act with his fingers, a loud voice called out his name. “Jasper!”
The man that was holding you down grabbed his hand out of your pants and stepped back abruptly. As you tried to stand up, he grabbed you behind the arms and threw you to the ground. You landed hard against your left arm, pain shooting through it as it stung faintly. You ended up in the middle of the floor, in the circle of men.
Just as you lifted your eyes off the ground, Jasper took his index and middle finger and licked them clean. He placed them in his mouth and sucked hard. “Mmmm. Delicious,” he smirked. His eyes grew dark as he stared you down, dancing at the sight of your horrified face as he continued making vulgar actions. Your body convulsed underneath you, and you felt like you were going to throw up. Panic striking through you as his gesture made you want to crawl into a hole.
You focused your eyes on the floor, not able to find the strength to look up. Your whole body trembling with fright as shock hit your entire system. You had just been violated in the most uncomfortable, probing way possible and you felt like you were going to be sick. That man had just sexually assaulted you, and he was laughing about it. So were some of the other men around you. You felt like a rag doll being pulled in all different directions. The men directing you to do whatever they desired from you. You dry heaved against the floor as more tears hit the floor. You had to stay strong. You couldn’t let these men break you down. You had already been broken though. Your legs sore and writhing from what just happened seconds ago. White noise sounded through your ears, your ears ringing as you lost all concentration of what lied around you. A heavy voice broke you out of your trance as you looked up.
“We don’t treat guests like that, Jasper. How many times do I have to tell you?” The new man scolded Jasper.
“I’m sorry, boss. It won’t happen again. I swear.” Fear crept in Jasper’s eyes as he looked up at the man. He laid a hand on Jasper’s shoulder and pulled him close to his side, pushing him behind his form.
“You’re gonna scare our new guest, Jasper. We have to greet our guests properly now,” he said as he walked up to you. His form towered over you as you continued leaning against the floor. You looked up at the shadow that stood above you. He had piercing blue eyes and short strawberry blonde hair with facial hair to match it. He was around six feet tall and looked intimidating.
He knelt down and got down to eye level with you. “Now. Tell me who you are, you pretty thing.” He reached out a hand and grazed your chin, tilting your head up so you would look him in the face. You pushed back as soon as his skin made contact with yours, fear seeping into your bones as the mere contact of a touch revolted through every sense in your body. Your body was hyper aware, and you didn’t want a single person touching you again. “Hey, it’s alright. I don’t bite,” he said as he saw you scoot back from his touch.
“Don’t…don’t touch me.” The words were so small that you could barely hear them. The man heard you though as he spoke again.
“Tsk tsk, did Jasper frighten you? Pardon him, he doesn’t know how to keep his hands to himself,” he said as he took a step closer to you. You looked up and saw Jasper ogling at you, blowing a kiss in your direction and winking at you. Your stomach twisted in knots at the sight of him and you turned your head the other direction, away from his prying eyes.
“Shall we start over? My name’s David. I’m the leader of this little pack of mine. We used to have more people, but some unfortunate events played out. It worked out for the rest of us though.” You looked up into his eyes and his face smirked in an evil let’s take over the town way. You flinched at the way he said that.
“Welcome to Silver Lake. I really do hope you enjoy your stay with us.” Laughter echoed through the room as the other men joined in with him. The noise made your head spin. You felt as if you were in a bad dream and you could wake up anytime now. He silenced the other men as he knelt down again to your level. Your heart rate skyrocketed. There was no kindness in his eyes. He was fake, a clown in a suit pretending to be welcoming. It made you sick.
“Now darling, what’s your name? I didn’t catch it before.”
“That’s because I didn’t tell you,” you said with force behind your words.
He laughed at your response. “We got us a sassy one, boys!” he yelled to the rest of the room. Some of the men oohed and awed, clapping their hands. What the fuck was wrong with these men. “It’s just a simple question, sweetie. Be a good girl and answer it.”
“Fuck you!” You spit in his face, landing some in his eye.
He laughed as he wiped the spit away with the sleeve of his tan, long sleeved shirt. When he was finished his laughter turned into coldness, his blue gaze going dark. He took his hand and hit you hard across the cheek. Pain radiated through your face as you cupped your cheek and hovered over the floor, your eyes looking towards the ground. Tears leaked from your eyes as the sting grew into a dull pain. That might leave a bruise.
“I can see how this is gonna go. I should’ve just let Jasper finish off the job earlier, baring yourself to all my men as you took the pain,” he growled as he grabbed the edge of your shirt and sat you up so you could look him in the face. You looked over his shoulder at Jasper, and he was jumping up and down as if he’d won an expensive prize.
“Jasper, come here!” he yelled behind him, driving Jasper over to where you sat on the floor.
“No, stay back!” you screamed in pure desperation, your body going in fight or flight mode. You were panting so hard you thought you had just got done running an intense marathon.
Before he reached you, David stopped him from coming closer. He was just inches away and you were cowering as his form towered over you. You brought your knees up to your chest and buried your face in between your legs. Too scared to look at the monster that stood before you. He was standing there waiting to tear all your walls down and that terrified the fuck out of you. You prayed silently to anyone that could hear you to save you from this hell you were dying in.
“Now Jasper, was anyone traveling with this girl? Or was she alone?”
“There was a man that was with her.”
“And where is he?”
“He’s back at the place we found her. Just a couple hours ride south from here. Joey knocked him out so he wouldn’t follow us.” You looked up from your shell at the mention of Joel, desperate for them to not touch that topic.
“And why the hell didn’t you kill him?” Anger boiled over his features as he clenched his teeth.
“Didn’t think it was what you wanted,” Jasper responded with a questioning stare as his forehead creased.
“You idiot. That man is going to try to track us down to get this girl back. Do you really think he wouldn’t come after us? You dumb piece of shit!” he yelled at Jasper, rage burning in his eyes. Your heart sped up just thinking of Joel coming to your rescue. Hope surged through you, but it was quickly stopped at the next demand that rolled off David’s lips.
David grabbed the collar of Jasper’s white shirt and pulled him to his face, his teeth gnashing. “You and Tony are going to go back there and kill that fucker before he comes knocking on our doorstep, you hear me?” He shoved Jasper back out of his grip.
“Yes, boss. On it,” he said as he pulled down his shirt and straightened his collar.
“Take the big guns. I want to be positive he dies. Better yet, bring me his head and I’ll make it worth your while.” David’s eyes crept over to you and you swear you never saw anything scarier in your life. His face was feral, demented. He was enjoying watching you squirm out of fear. This man was pure evil.
“No!” you shouted at the top of your lungs.
“Oh, yes. Hold on, Jasper. I have a different request. Bring me his body, but keep him alive. I want to see her face as I carve out his insides, striping him one by one of every layer of skin he has. I want to make him suffer in ways that you couldn’t even imagine.” A grin the size of the Cheshire Cat appeared on his face, making him look like the devil himself.
“He’s going to make you pay, you know,” you said in a bold voice.
“What did you say?” David asked as he turned to you, staring you down with daggers.
“I said he’s going to make you pay. Once he sees what you’ve done to me, he’ll be the one carving out your insides,” you spat at him.
He started to laugh as he placed his hands on his hips. It started as a slow rumble and turned into a chaotic hyena laugh, echoing through the room. That went on for a couple of minutes until he stopped and stared at you, his eyes like sharp knives about to stab you alive.
All of a sudden he went up behind you and pulled your hair hard, directing your sight to the top right corner of the room. You cried out in pain at the tug to your skull, but froze when you saw what was hiding in the corner at the top of the ceiling. You gasped in horror, losing your voice. Your eyes went wide at the ghastly sight.
Two bloodied corpses were chained to the ceiling, blood splattered against the top of the wall. They were completely skinned from head to toe. Chunks of them were missing, and you suddenly realized just what kind of monsters these men were. You threw up then, spilling all your fear and disgust onto the floor. Your body riving at the thought of what those poor people suffered. You fell to your hands, barely able to pick yourself up.
“That’s right, darling. We started running out of food so we had no choice. Now it’s a delectable taste. Fresh flesh simmering in a pot,” he kissed his fingers making it seem like it was a masterpiece.
You could barely pick your head up as you looked into his violent eyes. “You’re a…you’re a cannibal,” you stuttered out in fear.
“Correct. And that’s exactly what I’m going to do to your little friend when I get my hands on him.” A sadistic smile covered his face and you threw up again, but this time it was just bile. This was so beyond fucked up.
“Now let’s play a little game, shall we? The game is called cat and mouse. I’m the cat, you’re the mouse. I’m going to give you a five minute head start. If you can find a way out of here, I’ll let you go. If I catch you then you’re mine,” he grinned viciously as he looked at you intensely. “Oh and one other condition, all my men get to help me.” His laugh sounded like a prowling demon in disguise.
“Tha…that’s not fair, I’m outnumbered,” you cried as you stumbled over your words.
“Life isn’t about being fair, sweetie. It’s about winning, and I always win. Now you best stand up and get moving. The timer is about to start,” he said as he held up his watch, the big hand about to hit the 12 mark.
You pushed yourself up to a standing position, your legs weak as they wobbled underneath you. All strength had left your body, and at this point you were just running off fumes. He walked towards you quickly, and you stopped breathing. Afraid he’d sick Jasper on you again. He motioned toward Jasper and Tony, nodding his head toward the double doors. They nodded in understanding as they slipped out the door, shotguns in hand. They were going after Joel. Panic shot through you at the thought of Joel being captured. David interrupted the alarm going off in your head.
“On the count of three, I’m starting the timer. And when I start it, you better move as fast as you can go. You don’t want me catching you,” a sadistic grin marked his face, his eyes looking like they didn’t belong to him anymore. They were completely dark, cold and wicked. “One…Two…” He paused on the next count, giving you a couple seconds to breathe. Before you caught your breath, he finished the count. “Three..”
You stood still, looking around the spacious room. Figuring out your next move. You knew nothing about the build of this place. You were at a disadvantage. David probably knew every inch of this lodge. Your eyes widened in fear, you weren’t going to make it out alive. Not a chance. Your eyes met his again. All he did was smile and point at his watch, the seconds ticking by.
He looped a circle around you and came up behind you, putting his lips close to your ear. One word left his mouth, making your blood turn cold at the sound.
“Run.”
Chapter 14
Series Masterlist
#joel miller#joel tlou#joel the last of us#tlou fanfiction#joel x female reader#joel miller smut#joel miller fic#joel x oc#protective joel#joel miller fanfiction#slow burn#enemies to lovers#angst#look for the light
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Yaoi Essay: It was Ice Age Okay
My friend @tshirt3000 organized a friend zine where we talk about yaoi that was formative to us. It's a sizeable 80 pages, and you can read everyone's formative yaois in the digital copy here.
My essay was written in a single night and primarily primes you to pattern-seek so you can see my vision. My divine truth.
Before I speak, I need to prime you with the knowledge that you understand me. Even if you think you don’t, you actually do. So.
In seminal AO3 fandombait television program Teen Wolf (2011), the main point of fascination is Stiles Stilinski; a doe-eyed ADHD obsessive who chases his every thought with a frenetic intensity that often steals the scene he’s in.
Stiles being a fascinating little creature means that people want to ship him. I’d say he has three main people to do that with, and the big ship on campus was none of them. It was practically mandatory to ship him with Derek, the dark, brooding werewolf anti-hero.
I don’t think the suffocating pervasiveness of this ship is really that deep. Derek is a sexy paranormal tall dark and handsome boytoy. I’ve never seen the Vampire Diaries but I’m sure he wouldn’t be out of place in the cast. And hey, everybody is already obsessed with Stiles. I don’t think people actually care about the text of the show, just the pretty men they’re fixated on. The shit they made in their heads is so obviously just a gay version of every romance ever at the time.
But there is a secret recipe at play. Because in 2011, alongside Teen Wolf, a film was released. It was called Thor. You know, from the MCU? In Thor, the titular character’s treacherous baby brother (adopted) imprisons Thor on earth to steal his position. On Earth, Thor meets the love of his life, her father, and a zany bit character added for comedic relief.
Now I love Loki an abnormal amount for someone who cares as little about the MCU as I do. I love pathetic men and pathetic villains. As an avid fanfiction reader, I spent a lot of time trawling AO3 for Loki content, realizing they don’t think he’s pathetic, and clicking away. And over the years, I began seeing a weird pattern. Loki/Darcy. The comic relief girl. Her quirky antics were somehow enough to warrant a ship in a fandom that only blows up mandatory Two White Guys couples. And Loki is clearly NOT a brooding paranormal romance boy, but the ship had that Sterek stink on it anyway. A lot of it.
It seemed so mysterious, yet I remember, now, that Sterek wasn’t just popular with paranormal romance swooners, but people who just like funny ships. A zany idiot tormenting that brooding villain. A genderless mass appeal. An Entrapta and Hordak. The raw impulse for Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint readers to pair Kim Dokja and Yoo Joonghyeok before they started developing any chemistry at all, simply by nature of the kinds of characters they are.
Okay. Listen man. I need to talk to you about Ice Age.
If you’re unfamiliar, Ice Age is about a cynical mammoth named Manford taking a great southern migration as a chance to be alone. When he rescues criminally annoying sloth Sid, he’s forced to share his newfound alone time with him. He is not happy. Meanwhile, a pack of sabertooth tigers is on a vengeance quest against the humans who hunt them by eating their tribe leader’s baby. One of them, Diego, accidentally lets the human mother jump off a waterfall to escape, delivering the baby downriver to Manny and Sid. Diego presents himself as a tracker who can hunt the humans down, and the three of them decide to travel together to bring the baby back to the humans, one way or another.
I will be clear; the homoeroticism exists, and it exists between Manny and Sid. The chemistry exists, and it exists between Manny and Diego. Manny is the heart of the film. And I don’t care. Baby’s First Yaoi, the thing that really boiled my brain, was Diego’s extremely intimate threats to Sid’s life and Sid baiting him like a barking dog. I’m sorry.
The film never really stops insisting that Sid is genuinely annoying — it starts with his entire family leaving him behind and ends with him being kind of a fuckup too — but he’s key to the synergy regardless. There’s no great moment that announces ‘well maybe they weren’t seeing Sid’s true value!’ because he doesn’t have any. He’s a lazy, annoying, unempathetic, impulsive, smug little womanizer. He never learns. The film proposes that well, he doesn’t really have to— Manny is a deeply isolated person (mammoth?) who drives people away, and he needs someone who’s annoying and can’t understand boundaries to teach him to open up again. No matter how much he swats Sid back, Sid is confident in their friendship. Just like how no matter how many times Sid’s family abandoned him, he still went looking for them. They are lonely people, and Sid being an obnoxious little pissant forces them together.
On the other hand, I can’t imagine a film with just Manny and Diego. They get along well and have a great rapport, with Diego’s bad boy fun uncle attitude and Manny’s asshole with a heart of gold routine. But the thing is that they are two dudes who mind their own business. They are only casually uniting, and Diego is only doing it so his pack of evil sabertooths can eat the baby. The warmth of friendship doesn’t exist, and it has to bleed from Sid terrorizing them. They need their idiot to unite against. And since they don’t actually dislike Sid, it can only become camaraderie.
Diego is aware Manny is a smart guy and will take any threat extremely seriously, but he acts like himself from the beginning with Sid. After a while, it becomes clear Manny doesn’t care if he threatens Sid — because Sid is annoying, and he himself has threatened Sid plenty of times — but he also doesn’t intend to leave Sid alone where he can get hurt. Diego is 100% serious, but after a certain point he finds his own threats also becoming empty teasing. By the end of the movie, he’s openly endeared and friendly. He gives death threats like he gives a noogie.
There is something so unreal, to be honest, about forcing a born killer to hold you in his teeth after he repeatedly threatened to kill you, and him holding you there against your will because he thinks it is so funny.
Diego’s heel-face turn is obviously inspired by Manny, but over the course of the film, it’s clear that he, too, was lonely, and he, too, benefits from an extremely annoying person filling his loner life. His pack is dog-eat-dog, ready to abandon him if he doesn’t do his job, but Manny is willing to die for him, and — this is key to my childhood brain — Sid trusts him unconditionally despite doing nothing to earn it. Sid would follow Diego all year if he suddenly abandoned him for migration. He is just that kind of person.
That’s the secret recipe. What made Sterek mandatory even for people who have no interest in paranormal romance hunks. Why Darcy was thrown at Loki. This underlying vein of True Yaoi, of a dynamic based less on actual relationship and more on the core of the kind of people they are, and the kind of synthesis that is possible between those two ingredients. The zany idiot and the villain have this chemical reaction you could see from space. TO ME!
You need a zany person to do a whole lot of impulsive shit, and you need that zany person to be stupid enough to not notice they’re unwanted, or in danger, or that their dynamic is shifting, or the subtext of anyone’s behaviour. You need the person tormented to be a genuine threat, and they need to not melt, but be worn down. The simple pleasures of having your day-to-day life filled with life and noise, your every interaction with the world commented on, to the point you allow yourself to be defanged.
Sid does this to Manny, sure but it didn’t click even with the gay jokes because Manny is a kind, caring Dad Friend kind of guy who would fold for anyone. Diego is a fucking baby-eating tiger. But he trusts Manny, and Manny is endeared and receptive to Sid’s constant noise because he is lonely, and because of that, Diego, who is also lonely, allows himself to be endeared too. He had Sid’s throat in his mouth, and all he thought was that it was a funny thing to do.
My friend Hyde tagged me in this post.
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9, 13, 16, 25 🫡 godspeed
9. worst part of canon
The Great Divide lol? Jk, I generally like canon a lot, actually! I think it is such an amazing framework to play around in. But I do wish they had grounded the Southern and Northern Water Tribes in research/real-life cultural roots to the same degree as they did for the other nations. From what I've seen from circumpolar fans, it seems like it's more of a stereotypical and surface-level referencing vs the attention to detail given to the Fire and Earth and Air cultures. I wish canon had built that out more fully and deeply (or at least, built the North out if there was a theme being threaded around cultural loss due to the impacts of war).
13. worst blorboficiation
I feel like awkward turtleduck Zuko is the easy answer here...so I'm going to say Katara. I really like her, for her anger and her heart and her sense of justice and her sense of care and her dorkiness and hunger to learn. It feels like a lot of times she's boiled down to 'group mom' with no other layers, or to a girl boss/girl power fantasy that doesn't actually engage with her trauma and responses to it, or her ssensse of justice. She's a really great, complex, human character and I hate to see her filed down to just the one facet that lets her slot into the background of someone else's story.
(Which is maybe like the opposite of blorboification, to be put into the background lol? De-blorbified haha?)
16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)
I see a lot of headcanons/characterizations of Zuko as incredibly anxious, frequently to the point of paralysis and distress and needing rescue, and it's one of those things that feels totally divorced from his actual canon characterization to me. He is all action in canon. He throws himself at every problem face-first and he'll figure it out on the way. He has a big emotionally painful revelation that he was raised with lies and he goes to yell at his dad and point swords at him about it. He has an identity crisis so he does some vigilante stuff. A more experienced, older firebender gets in his face so he challenges him to a duel--three times.
He is not paralyzed by anxiety. He is a perpetual motion machine. He broods, he doesn't ruminate, and there is a difference.
25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing
Oh man lol. Ignoring all the purity wank stuff (which. what a big thing to ignore.), how about when we complain about how other shippers are rude and mischaracterize us and come at the Zukkas, when we don't come for them. Which just goes to show how uniquely terrible and rude and awful and wicked and ignorant and mean those other shippers are, and how they don't know anything about canon either, and also their ship is stupid and racist and phobic and--
But don't worry, we don't come at other shippers.
(For the choose violence ask game!)
#ask games#ask and answers#sorryyyyy this one maybe got a bit harsh I do promise I am not vagueing anyone lol
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Sly’s ✨personal opinion✨ on Octopath Traveler’s english voice acting
Ok it’s been a while since I’ve wanted to do this! I tend to play almost all games with the jp voices when I play jrpgs but that doesn’t mean some English VAs didn’t do a great job! :)
All respect towards them and everyone else who has different opinions; I will simply rate them with ✅ passed and ⛔️ not passed basing on my personal tastes
Octopath 1
Ophilia: ⛔️ not passed - I really don’t like how artificially high-pitched her voice is?? It just sounds a bit fake :((( really not a fan
Cyrus: ⛔️ not passed - Listen I know a lot of people love his English voice and while I do agree that it’s not half bad I also must admit it just doesn’t fit him 😭 compared to the young, honey sweet voice he has in jp I think he sounds a bit too old? If that makes sense. Like he’s 10 years older or something 😂 I like how the VA exaggerated the tone of certain expressions tho, very dramatic!
Tressa: ✅ passed - I LOVE how snarky and bratty she sounds! The VA did a great job, she sounds just tomboyish and childlish enough
Olberic: ✅ passed - ok we’re talking about Patrick Seitz guys what do you want me to tell you!! He’s great and I don’t mind a more booming and intimidating Olberic compared to the quiet and brooding jp one. Fits him so well!
Primrose: ✅ passed - one of the exceptions where I prefer the en VA to the jp one. While the jp voice is sweet an and soft, the English voice has a coldness and edge to it that just fits Primrose’s personality so well. Great job!
Alfyn: ✅ passed - a biiit more soft spoken compared to the deeper, louder jp voice but I still think it fits him. Not much to add
Therion: ⛔️ not passed - I’M SORRY because this is another fan favorite but I really don’t like how the va completely changed his personality, going from the quiet, soft spoken, wary thief to a snarkier version of sonic the hedgehog 😭😭 also malus because they didn’t bother to make him fake the merchant voice during the disguise moment in his ch1 :((((
H’aanit: ✅ passed - MOMMY- I mean I LOVE her en voice SO MUCH. Like her jp voice was also great, but the VA somehow managed to keep the deep, cold sound of her voice and use it in a way that’s just so in character. The “NGAAAH” she makes when you boost her attacks is still implemented into my brain and I love it
Octopath 2
Ochette: ✅ passed - I love how faithful to the jp voice the actress was! She really did a good job also because it was a challenging role imo. Nailed the little growls and rawrs! Adorable!
Castti: ✅ passed - A nice interpretation, not much to say. The eng VA has a sweeter voice than the jp one, who added a bit of raspiness to her I really liked but overall a neat job.
Throné: ✅ passed - LOVE the VA’s voice. Deep, cold, but at the same time you can sense warmth in it. Excellent interpretation :)
Osvald: ✅ passed - The best adaptation in ot2, hands down! I know his Va is also a vtuber and a professional in his job and it shows. SO GOOD MAN! The tone, the personality, 100% nailed. Even though jp Osvald is also great this one HAS to take the crown
Partitio: ✴️ passed (?) - This one was hard to decide for me because while the eng acting does nail the southern accent and the overall vibe it’s also a bit too soft spoken for an energetic and loud personality such as Partitio’s. There’s like a huge difference between the jp acting and the eng one and I’m usually not a fan of that because it completely changes a character’s personality in a way
Agnea: ⛔️ not passed - again with the fake high-pitched voice 😭 idk it might be a pet peeve of mine at this point but. Idk I can tell when a va is clearly trying to fake a tone of voice that is really different from theirs and it bothers me so much
Temenos: ⛔️ not passed - I’m sorry but this one is a big no from me :( I know many others also found his eng voice a bit too emotionless and plain, it really misses that playful and snarky tone the jp VA gave him. Not to mention the part when [redacted] happens in Stormhail ch3, the emotions just… aren’t there. I’ve also heard the eng VA was a novice though so I’m sure he’ll have time to improve :)
Hikari: ✅ passed - I really like his eng voice and interpretation! It’s faithful to the jp one and suits his personality well. A great job!
Well these were my opinions that absolutely no one asked for! I’m sure all the VAs did their best and put a lot of effort in their job ❤️
#octopath traveler#octopath traveler 2#octopath traveler ii#I wanted to ramble about voice acting tonight#I respect everyone’s job!#I wanna hear your takes too if you wanna talk about them!#just be civil of course :) thank you!#sly rambles
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For the ask the oc
Hello, Leta and Ria! Hope you two are doing great there 💖💖💖
Here's my question for the both of you, what are your thoughts on meeting Val and the others for the first time?
@shinmiyovvi AFTER WHAT FEELS LIKE YEARS IVE FINALLY ANSWERED THIS I’m so sorry it took this long Shin 😭😭 Hope you like it nonetheless 🥺💖💖💖 tried to add the southern flare for Zari!
“Ah, hey there Shin! It’s been awhile since we’ve last seen you.” Leta smiles softly, “I’m doing great by the way. Ria, come say hi!”
Ria waves a hand while she lights a cigarette with the other. “Mmh, yea, hi. We’re both peachy. Let’s hurry up and answer the question.”
Leta sighs with a roll of her eyes, “Don’t worry about her, that's just how she is. So, our thoughts when we first met Val and the others? Well, to be honest when I first saw Lena I was happy to know I wouldn't be the only woman in the crew. God knows what I’d do if I had to deal with all these boys and that testosterone on my own. But…..I also noticed something about her, like…..she lost someone or something dear to her. It made me feel sad cause I know what that pain feels like.”
Ria nods her head in agreement, “Licia reminded me of myself, a woman wronged by the world and protecting herself behind a guise of anger and coldness. It also felt nice to have somebody to possibly relate to.”
“Meeting Ji Eun was interesting I suppose. I could instantly tell upon seeing her that she wasn't one for bullshit and I respected that. But somethin’ told me we wouldn’t exactly be super close and boy was my instinct right. Not that we hate each other but don't you reckon you’d hate it if somebody was puttin down the effort you have for your work. I know she’s testing me but gee does it irk me. Sorry for rambling but I respect Ji Eun and I’m glad to be in her company. Bout you, Ria?”
Ria was unusually quiet as she took another huff of her cigarette, “......I felt heartbroken meeting Ji Eun for the first time…..It was clear as day what she had gone through ...what haunted her. It made me feel…..angry not at her but for her. Made me wanna protect her, poor gal doesn’t deserve any more pain or heartache.”
Leta looked at Ria in slight surprise but shifted into understanding, she decided not to dwell on it and went to move on.
“Hmm okay well, let's see we can talk bout Arthur next. One look at him and hearing him talk told me I’d constantly be having headaches around him. But I also knew I’d share some pretty good laughs.” Leta smiles softly, chuckling. “Nowadays he likes to tease and get on my nerves but it’s nothing a little sarcasm and wit can’t fix.”
“.....He’s like the father I wished I was blessed with. At first I was wary, and didn't really think much of him. Suppose it was the kindness he had and the fact that he actually seemed to care and listened to what I had to say that drew me in. Honestly, I think my heart knew that we’d be able to form a connection but my mind just wasn't ready for it at first.”
“Suppose we can't trade one for the other?”
“Hold your horses there, girlie!”
“Worth a shot wadnit (Wasn’t it)?”
Ria snorts, “Anyways, lastly there's Dragomir. Don't judge a book by its cover would be an understatement here, thought he was gonna be that type of man who likes to act all big and strong or even the silent and brooding type but boy was my gut instinct so off. Not that I’m complaining, it’s actually kinda heartwarming to see how sweet and kind Drago can be and don’t tell him I said this but he’s almost like a big teddy bear with how sweet he is. It’s also nice that he’s a great listener.”
“......It was hard to talk to him at first….sometimes it was hard to even look at him….Miro reminded me of my brother so much. It was nice to have someone like Red around but it was like a reminder that I would never get to see my brother again. Sometimes I like to think that Red sent Miro to me, lemme know that it’s okay, that he’d never be mad at me for moving on. Similar to Lena who I see as a sister, Miro quickly became like a brother to me and sometimes I feel guilty but then I remember Red always wanted me to be happy and I tell myself that he’d be happy to see I was able to form such a great bond with the others.”
Ria puts an arm around Leta’s shoulders and pulls her in for a side hug for comfort. “Hope that answers your question, kiddo. And have a nice day/night alright?”
#ask#answered#shinmiyovvi#cod zombies#azaria arkon#primis zari#ultimis zari#cod zombies oc#codz oc#felt nice to try to get into the Zari’s mindset again#hope to do more with them soon#anyways love you shin#hope you’re doing okay
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10 Characters, 10 Fandoms
Tagged by @pinayelf thank you :D
Magnus Hammersmith (Metalocalypse)
Real fucked up of the creators of this show to take my celebrity crush + bisexual awakening as the visual reference for a character who's always partially shirtless and wielding a knife. Also there's a 5000 year old prophecy that says his destiny is to be a forgotten loser.
2. Captain Nemo/Prince Dakkar (Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea)
The gif is from the Disney movie, but my heart belongs to the original novel characterization. Genius inventor who turned his back from society, but not from marginalized people. Good at everything except for not falling down self-destructive spirals. Takes money from sunken colonialist warships and uses it to fund revolutions. Serves as a haunting metaphor as the ocean itself. Please when will we have a faithful adaptation?
3. Thoth (The Kane Chronicles interpretation)
I am specifically going with The Kane Chronicles' interpretation of this Egyptian god. Especially compared to a lot of other interpretations of him in modern media, I like how the book doesn't portray him as this stuffy "everyone is an idiot except me" kind of guy. It's really refreshing seeing an interpretation of a god of knowledge who is clearly scary-powerful and a genius, but is also the ADHD weirdo who keeps getting distracted and can't finish his projects. I also like how he doesn't brush off the protagonists because they're mortals or teenagers or whatever. The book does a great job showing how his brain works and how he thinks, which makes him a lot more effective as a god of knowledge imo. Also they made him relocate in Memphis, Tennessee? After so many British adaptations of him, it's refreshing to see a god of knowledge with a southern accent (if you listen to the audiobook).
It's so good, it almost makes up for the book's interpretation of Anubis.
4. Vivienne (Dragon Age)
I thought for a while about which Dragon Age character I should add. While there are characters I made more stuff about during my peak years in the fandom, Vivienne is the main character I keep going back to. I love her elegance, the way she's written, her voice acting, her look??? Fashion/character design in the franchise peaked with her. Also as far as a Circle character goes, I find her utterly fascinating as someone having to survive in an oppressive system and developing different/conflicting perspectives about it. I think she was a much-needed perspective and I adore her. Also now I was just reminded of the trend of people having their white mage ocs or the other white mage characters "educate" her about oppression and now I'm mad about Dragon Age bs again lol. Vivienne is the best choice for divine don't @ me.
5. Dale Cooper (Twin Peaks)
*Holds him up like a a cat* he's nice :)
I've rewatched this show (the main series - haven't gotten around to watching the new show) and every time I find more reasons to love him. He could have so easily been this brooding cynical noir type, but instead he's this ray of sunshine who sees the beauty and joy in everything around him. I'm glad he's okay :)
6. Shaolin Fantastic (The Get Down)
Putting aside my heartbreak over this show's cancellation for a second to talk about how good the cast is. I thought about choosing Zeke, but I couldn't not choose Shaolin. I love how he's introduced as this mysterious genius who was willing to fight a man in an alley for a record, but then the main crew gets to know him and he's a huge dork? He takes care of pigeons, he samples the Star Wars theme in his DJ sets, he's nice :) Also the cool big brother vibe he has with the younger characters is really cute. It would suck if this show got cancelled so the story will always end with him being forced to go back to his abuser :) that would suck.
7. Nozomu Itoshiki (Sayonara, Zetsubou-Sensei)
I think he's funny and pretty and I hope he gets therapy.
8. Bella Goth (The Sims)
Weird to add a Sims character maybe, but not doing so would be a disservice to the chokehold this woman had on me as a younger player. 10 year old me broke my copy of TS2 because I fucked up the game files by trying to get Bella back.
9. Benny (Fallout: New Vegas)
I knew I had to pick a FNV character. I considered Silus, since he's interesting for a Legion character. But in the end I went with Benny. He has the best aesthetic, and his evolution from "the guy who shot you and instigated your protagonist's whole plot" to "pathetic little guy who agrees to help you take down the system because everyone sucks--and also he's into feet" is some masterful character growth.
10. Rumpelstiltskin/Mr. Gold (Once Upon a Time)
This show is a mess, but the scene where he beats that man with his cane was kinda hot. Also you can't make a man 1. the most powerful force in the universe, 2. somehow still pathetic, 3. have that hairstyle, 4. trying to be a good father and partner but always failing because of his own selfishness, and 5. Scottish, and not expect me to enjoy him. Robert Carlyle put his entire rumpelstussy into that performance.
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Before Deluca -- introductions
1700 held promise for my hometown—a tiny seaside port near the tip of Calabria, in Southern Italy, you need not know which—we had seen some fame and a great deal of loss and were running headlong into a fresh year with a fresh century on top.
But right then it was not yet 1700, it was the eve of the last night of 1699 and I, well, I was pensive, cautious, perhaps even cynical while I stood gazing at the moonlit sea. My family consisted of silk traders; producers and vendors and while I contributed to their business for thirty of my forty-five years…I had nothing to show for it. Nor did I particularly want anything. Being foreman had served me well for the last fifteen of those years, and I earned much in my place among my workers, not only their respect and admiration but valuable skills I could take anywhere.
I was fine with my life, comfortable even. My family, on the other hand, wished me wedded. And I was ‘running out of time’ to provide them mewling grandkids. Truth was we had appearances to uphold, and an unmarried man of my age not beholden to the arts or sciences did not bolster the family image. A wife and child, however, would.
And so I was subjected to undesired gatherings and private parties thrown solely to introduce me to available socialites. These soirees were attended entirely by women, of course, always women. My mother was on a mission and, “Dear, sweet, worrying mother of mine, I adore your concern and all you do for me…but I prefer the affections of men,” was not an excuse I could employ to dissuade her.
She would not have taken well to its truth.
So that evening, as time ticked down to a new year, I was pensive, distracted, bordering on brooding. But watching the ships come in, especially in the gloom of night, when none but the dockworkers were hustling about—in delightfully less than they wore during daylight hours—often improved my mood.
Despite growing up around ships, watching them come and go and marveling at all the colorful folk who came and went with them, I had never sailed. Not until the dawn of 1700 would I even set foot on such a vessel—and soon after I would forget the safety and comfort of solid ground. Yet we are discussing the night before, when my future sauntered off one of those ships. Whether I wanted it, asked for it, agreed to it…well, that was as unclear then as it is now.
But his presence heralded magnificent, insurmountable change.
#writeblr#snippet#writing#novel#before deluca#what is consistency#i shared the next bit before this one like a fool#oh well#this is just for fun anyway
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