#how to resolve a dispute. how to communicate and compromise. these are all things you are not born with
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I think there's no greater indication that disco elysium is sympathetic towards communism when it literally says "communism is failure" and then the literal gameplay itself rewards trying and failing. The most obvious one being the Shivers check at the FELD mural, which is an Impossible 20 check BUT opens itself up again and again the longer you spend in the world doing things, but even just looking at sheer probabilities, for any given white check, rolling first and THEN putting a point into that skill upon failure is more likely to grant you success than putting a point first and then rolling, but that would require failing first.
Other things too: Precarious world saying you'll 100% fail red checks no matter what (not necessarily a bad thing, btw!! throwing the boule into the sea is a success but like. in some other ways one would want a perfect petanque throw instead. but people wouldn't typically assume that failure is desirable sometimes from the start) persuading you to accept that you'll fail some things that is irrevocable, for a world where everything is just a tiny bit easier.
The faux game over screen when you faint after reading Dora's letter— emulating a sense of failure on the scale of the entire game. When it rolls up most people go "What?? Game over?? No way, what did I do wrong!!" and waking up after that, with no huge or lasting impact on Harry's health or morale really tells the player, "Sometimes things will seem so bad that it all seems like it's coming to an end, but it's not the end, it's really not the end, go drink so water, you can still go on despite this failure"
I'm sure there are other things as well that are eluding me but like. The literal gameplay rewards failing and succeeding far more so than simply succeeding every single time, and I think you get a fuller experience of Elysium that way too
#just thinking thoughts...#disco elysium#idk man when did we get so scared of failing!!#people never want to speak in class because 'what if I'm wrong :((('#well then you are wrong... that is okay... it's normal to fail... sometimes saying the wrong thing is a great way to jumpstart a topic...#'getting a good grade in X is both normal to want and possible to achieve'#okay sure but have you made peace with the fact that getting a BAD grade in X isn't a bad thing?#a bad grade in being friends... okay... so you didn't check up on someone in 3 months... you failed... that's fine...#you can learn from it!! you can learn how to keep in touch with people. how to take care of them when they're sick.#how to resolve a dispute. how to communicate and compromise. these are all things you are not born with#and will fail first before succeeding at#Like yes I get that in the age of surveillance your failures may be recorded and preserved forever and that's not great#but if we don't normalize failure I really think we'll just suffocate and die
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How Do You Handle Disagreements In A Dynamic?
In the intricate dynamics of D/S relationships, disagreements are not uncommon. These unique relationships thrive on trust, communication, and understanding, making it crucial to navigate disputes respectfully and constructively. Today, we will explore how dominants and submissives can effectively handle disagreements within the context of their lifestyle relationship.
Establish Clear Communication Channels
Communication is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship, and D/S relationships are no exception. Both dominants and submissives
should prioritize open and honest communication. Setting up clear channels for communication, such as regular check-ins, can help ensure that concerns and disagreements are addressed promptly and without judgment.
Respect and Acknowledge Boundaries
In a D/S relationship, boundaries are essential. Both partners should establish their boundaries early on and respect them at all times. When a disagreement arises, it is crucial to acknowledge each other's limits and ensure that the discussion remains within the agreed-upon boundaries.
Maintain a Calm and Respectful Tone
Disagreements can escalate quickly if either partner becomes confrontational or aggressive. Dominants and submissives should make a conscious effort to maintain a calm and respectful tone when discussing their differences. Avoiding insults or hurtful language is essential to preserving trust and intimacy.
Active Listening
Listening is a fundamental skill in any relationship, and it is particularly important in D/S dynamics. Both dominants and submissives should practice active listening, which involves paying full attention to the other person without interrupting, making judgments, or formulating responses prematurely. This allows each partner to express their feelings and concerns fully.
Seek Compromise
In any relationship, compromise is often the key to resolving disagreements. Dominants and submissives should be willing to find the middle ground when conflicts arise. This may involve making concessions or finding alternative solutions that satisfy both partners' needs and desires.
Consider a Cooling-Off Period
Sometimes, disagreements can become heated, and it may be challenging to find a resolution immediately. In such cases, both dominants and submissives can agree to take a break from the discussion to cool off. This break can provide time for reflection and help prevent saying things in the heat of the moment that may later be regretted.
Seek Guidance if Necessary
If a disagreement persists and both partners are struggling to find common ground, seeking guidance from a qualified therapist or counselor who specializes in D/S relationships can be beneficial. A professional can offer insights and strategies to help resolve issues and strengthen the relationship.
Additionally here are a few ideas specific to both sides of the slash.
Suggestions for Dominants:
Exercise Patience: As the dominant partner, it is essential to exercise patience when disagreements arise. Recognize that your submissive may need time to express their feelings and concerns fully. Avoid rushing the resolution process and allow for open dialogue.
Empathize and Validate: Show empathy and validate your submissive's emotions and perspectives. Even if you don't agree with them, acknowledging their feelings as valid can go a long way in resolving disagreements and maintaining trust.
Provide Reassurance: Reassure your submissive of your commitment to their well-being and safety. Disagreements can sometimes trigger insecurity, so offering reassurance about your intentions and the strength of your bond can help alleviate anxiety.
Utilize Aftercare: Aftercare is a crucial component of D/S relationships, especially after intense disagreements. Ensure that your submissive's emotional and physical needs are met during the aftercare process to foster emotional healing and reconnection.
Set Clear Expectations: Establish clear expectations for how disagreements will be handled in your dynamic. This may include discussing preferred communication methods and the process for resolving conflicts. Having these guidelines in place can prevent misunderstandings.
Suggestions for Submissives:
Express Your Needs: Do not hesitate to express your needs and concerns to your dominant partner. Effective communication is essential in D/S relationships, and your dominant may not always be aware of your feelings or boundaries unless you express them clearly.
Use "I" Statements: When discussing disagreements, use "I" statements to express your feelings and perspectives. For example, say, "I feel uncomfortable when..." rather than making accusatory statements. This approach encourages constructive dialogue.
Trust Your Dominant: Trust is the foundation of any D/S relationship. Trust that your dominant partner has your best interests at heart, even when disagreements arise. This trust can make it easier to work through conflicts.
Practice Self-Care: Take care of yourself emotionally and physically, especially after disagreements. Engage in self-care activities that help you relax and refocus. This self-care can contribute to your overall well-being and resilience.
Seek Clarification: If you don't fully understand your dominant's perspective or expectations, seek clarification. It's okay to ask questions and ensure you have a clear understanding of what is expected of you in the relationship.
In dominant/submissive relationships, disagreements are a natural part of human interaction. How dominants and submissives handle these disagreements can significantly impact the overall health and longevity of their relationship. By prioritizing clear communication, respecting boundaries, maintaining respect, and seeking compromise, D/S partners can navigate disagreements while preserving the trust, intimacy, and fulfillment that characterize their unique connection. Remember that every D/S relationship is unique, so tailor these strategies to fit your specific dynamics and needs.
What advice do you have navigating disagreements in a lifestyle partnership?
As with all of my thoughts, please see this disclaimer.
©TLK2023
#d/s relationship#dom/sub#bdsmblog#bd/sm community#bd/sm lifestyle#bdsmlife#d/s lifestyle#d/s#The Daily D/S
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How to Handle a Beneficiary Dispute in California
When a loved one passes away, it can be a difficult and emotional time for everyone involved. Unfortunately, disputes can arise when it comes to dividing their assets. Beneficiary disputes can be stressful and overwhelming, especially when you don't know the legal process. If you're facing a beneficiary dispute in California, there are steps you can take to resolve it. In this article, we'll walk you through the process of handling a beneficiary dispute and offer some helpful tips to make the process smoother.
Understanding Beneficiary Disputes
Before we dive into how to handle a beneficiary dispute, it's essential to understand what it is. A beneficiary dispute is a disagreement between individuals over how to distribute the assets of a deceased person. The dispute can be between family members or other beneficiaries. Common reasons for a beneficiary dispute include:
Lack of clarity in the deceased's will or trust
Disputes over the value of assets
Disputes over who is entitled to specific assets
Disputes over the interpretation of the will or trust
Hiring an Attorney
When facing a beneficiary dispute, the best course of action is to hire an experienced attorney who specializes in probate law. An attorney can help you navigate the legal process and advocate for your interests. Here are some things to consider when hiring an attorney:
Look for an attorney who specializes in probate law
Check their credentials and experience
Look for an attorney who is responsive and communicates well
Discuss fees and payment options upfront
Mediation
Mediation is a way to resolve a dispute without going to court. In mediation, a neutral third party helps the parties reach a settlement. Mediation is less formal and less expensive than going to court. The mediator helps the parties communicate and understand each other's positions. If an agreement is reached, the parties sign a written settlement agreement.
Going to Court
If mediation fails, the next step is to go to court. This can be a lengthy and expensive process, so it's important to have an attorney who can guide you through it. Here are the steps involved in going to court:
Filing a petition with the court
Serving the petition on all interested parties
Responding to the petition
Discovery (gathering evidence)
Settlement negotiations
Trial
Tips for Resolving a Beneficiary Dispute
Consider the long-term consequences of your actions. It's important to weigh the benefits of fighting for a particular asset against the potential costs, both financial and emotional.
Be prepared to compromise. In most cases, both parties will need to give a little to reach a settlement.
Keep the lines of communication open. This includes listening as well as speaking. Try to understand the other party's point of view, and be willing to explain your own.
Remember, a beneficiary dispute can be a lengthy and emotional process. It's important to have a support system in place, whether it's friends, family, or a therapist. Taking care of your mental and emotional health is just as important as resolving the dispute itself.
FAQs
Q : What is a beneficiary dispute?
A : A beneficiary dispute is a disagreement between individuals over how to distribute the assets of a deceased person.
Q : How can an attorney help with a beneficiary dispute?
A : An attorney can help you navigate the legal process and advocate for your interests.
Q : What is mediation?
A : Mediation is a way to resolve a dispute without going to court. In mediation, a neutral third party helps the parties reach a settlement.
Q : What if mediation fails?
A : If mediation fails, the next step is to go to court.
Q : How can I prepare for a beneficiary dispute?
A : It's important to hire an experienced attorney who specializes in probate law and to be willing to compromise. Taking care of your mental and emotional health is also important during this process.
Conclusion
A beneficiary dispute can be a difficult and emotional experience, but it's important to remember that there are options for resolving it. By understanding the legal process, hiring a family law probate San Jose, ca, and following these tips, you can increase your chances of a successful outcome. Remember to stay focused, communicate clearly, and be willing to compromise. With the right support, you can navigate this challenging time and come out the other side stronger.
If you're facing a beneficiary dispute in California, don't go through it alone. At Affordable and Express Legal, we can help you navigate the legal process and advocate for your interests. Our experienced attorneys specialize in probate law and can guide you through mediation or court proceedings. Contact us today for a free consultation.
Reference URL :- How to Handle a Beneficiary Dispute in California
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Discovering Ancient Methods of Conflict Resolution in Pre-Christian Societies
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Conflicts and disputes are an inherent part of human interaction, and pre-Christian societies were no exception to this rule. But how did our ancestors deal with these situations before the advent of modern legal systems and judicial procedures? The answer may surprise you.
In many pre-Christian societies, conflict resolution was achieved through a combination of mediation, negotiation, and retaliation. When a dispute arose, the parties involved would first attempt to resolve the issue through peaceful means, often with the help of a neutral third party who would act as a mediator. These mediators were often respected members of the community, chosen for their impartiality and wisdom.
If mediation failed, the next step was negotiation. This involved the parties involved coming to an agreement on how to resolve the dispute, often with the help of their respective leaders or elders. In some cases, compensation was paid to the injured party, while in others, a compromise was reached that satisfied both parties.
If negotiation failed, however, retaliation was often the last resort. This could take the form of physical violence, with one party attacking the other, or it could involve social ostracism, where the offending party was shunned by the community.
Interestingly, pre-Christian societies often had a complex system of laws and regulations that governed how disputes were to be handled. These laws were often based on custom and tradition and were enforced by the community as a whole, rather than by a central authority. This meant that everyone had a stake in ensuring that justice was done, and that disputes were resolved fairly.
Of course, not all pre-Christian societies handled conflicts and disputes in the same way. In some cultures, for example, blood feuds were common, where the family of an injured party would seek revenge against the offending party and their family. In others, trial by combat was the preferred method of resolving disputes, with the winner being declared the victor and the loser being deemed guilty.
Despite these differences, one thing is clear: conflict resolution was an important part of pre-Christian society, and our ancestors had developed sophisticated methods for dealing with disputes long before the advent of modern legal systems. While these methods may seem archaic to us today, they were effective in their time and helped to maintain social order and cohesion within communities.
In conclusion, understanding how pre-Christian societies handled conflicts and disputes is an important part of understanding our own cultural heritage. While some of these methods may seem barbaric to us today, they were an essential part of maintaining social order and ensuring that justice was done. By studying these ancient methods of conflict resolution, we can gain a deeper appreciation for the ingenuity and creativity of our ancestors, and perhaps even learn a thing or two about how to handle conflicts in our own lives.
ancient history #conflict resolution #pre-Christian societies #mediation #negotiation #retaliation #social order
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�I love you.� What a punch these three simple words can bring � if it�s delivered the right way.
There’s a secret combination of hidden male obsessions. Align all three and you’ve unlocked the mystery of your man’s heart.
The thing is, some people just can�t say it comfortably without the words tripping out of their mouths. You�d think they�ll morph and turn into ogres, the way they squirm and go around beating around the bush before finally saying the words.
Then there are also those who openly say the words but don�t really mean it. Nevertheless, it doesn�t matter if they do or don�t say the words. What matters is that a relationship remains honest and happy.
What are the things that make a relationship work anyway? The same factors work for all kinds of relationship. Whether it�s a relationship between lovers, among family members, friends, office workers, and business partners, the same foundations apply for it to work.
If a pillar is missing, the whole thing crumbles. Three pillars make up the foundation. We call the three pillars The Relationship Tripod.
Let us discuss them in detail:
The Companionship Leg
First, it must be understood that a relationship requires at least two people for it to exist, let alone work. You must be visible to the other person.
If the relationship is long distance, you must at least feel that the other one is there. It won�t do any good to take the other�s existence for granted and count on the other to check up on you. You must also show compassion.
If you keep up the show of indifference, it just spells failure. The other person needs to sense your feelings for them. Show them kindness, gentleness, sensitivity - anything that shows you care for them. It�s not that hard to say �I�m always here for you,� is it? Whoever receives this show of affection must give something back. Everyone must do his or her part in a relationship because it�s a give and take condition.
The Compromise Leg
As mentioned earlier, a relationship is a give-and-take situation. Not all people are made alike; even if two people are so uncannily similar, there might still exist small differences that could spark an argument.
This is why an agreement has to be reached on every argument, whether petty or vital. All kinds are important, especially when it comes to a relationship. Someone has to win and someone has to give in. This is why the discussion of differences is so essential.
Discuss the disparity: What is the problem? Why is it a problem? Who should compromise and adjust to the problem? All these should be resolved. Conceding sometimes doesn�t make you a loser; rather, it goes to show how important a relationship is to you. �I guess you�re right.� These words could be the balm of your disputes.
The Communication Leg
There would be no discussion of differences, no showing of affection, and no saying of words without communication. This third and last leg is probably the most vital in a relationship. It enables us to know what the other party feels and what is needed to make the partnership work.
It gives us the ability to say the words that are wanted and needed. In short, the other two legs won�t happen if the last one isn�t present. Just a small act of communication could go a long way in improving a relationship.
You can do simple things like writing a small note on a piece of paper, or writing short emails at least occasionally. Do something to give truth to your existence and your relationship. Don�t take this for granted, because a lot of relationships crumble due to lack of any contact.
Take the long distance relationship, for instance. A lot fail, but some succeed because they make contact with each other almost every day. Even business associates keep in contact by sending each other progress reports.
Any form of relationship is a box of chocolates, as Forrest Gump puts it. Some tastes good and some don�t. Overall, the experience of having a box of chocolates gives you a good feeling because eating each and every piece of chocolate gives an experience - an experience of bitterness, sweetness, or even bitter-sweetness. You don�t get every flavor that you desire in a box.
So if you are looking for a relationship that is easy on the heart and mind, get ready for the harsh reality. It entails the effort of everyone involved for it to work well.
GET FREE GOOD ADVICE FOR A GOOD AND LONG RELATIONSHIP HELP.
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What Should You Know About Employment Legal Services?
Every employee finds oneself in a scenario where they want employment law services at some point. The answer is yes.
Each Employment Agreements contains several elements that can be difficult to grasp, especially for a layperson. That's why most of the employment legal services would advise, and even advise against, executing a contract before seeing an employment law counsel. This seems to be especially true when signing a long-term job deal. It is crucial that once one always does, they are fully informed of all the finer intricacies encased in the agreement.
An employment legislation counsel provides all the much preventative assistance to make sure that the contract adequately accommodates all of your interests as an employee. Meanwhile, on the other side, occasionally things take a turn for the worst and you & your employer are no more seeing eye to eye.
It is critical that your first stop be an employment Leasing Disputesservices agency. Basically, every employer wants to get out of any difficult position without making any concessions. Yet, selecting an expert who is well-versed in employment legislation is essential, especially if they are the same ones that assisted you with the initial signing process.
Whenever an employee has a grievance concerning their company, the first thought that springs to mind is to rush to court. It's not always the ideal way to approach a situation, as any qualified employment law expert will tell you. It is because lawsuit is a costly procedure, and depending on the employer and also how eager they are to compromise, it might take a long time in court. This necessitates a significant investment of precious resources. The employment lawyer will counsel you that the greatest part to do is to start negotiating about Draft Employment Contract & Agreements.
Employment legal services cater to negotiations sufficiently and, as a result, maintain competent workers who are trained and experienced in bargaining. As this is the most important aspect of the process, make sure you only hire the best lawyers. Again when the negotiations begin, you will have the chance to communicate your issue to your employer & attempt a bipartisan solution. Most of the employers will aim for a solution at this point since it provides the quickest, cheapest, and also most convenient manner of resolving the problem for all parties concerned.
There are several areas of business where you may require assistance, such as starting your own business, Body Corporate Disputes, hiring employees, selling your firm, and much more.
When you do business with customers or suppliers make sure your contracts are lawful and binding. If somehow the contract is broken, you do not wish to find out here that you will not be compensated or that you will have to pay.When you were involved in a collision or experienced an accident that was not your fault, you may be able to receive compensation. Your personal injury attorney will be able to inform you whether or not you have a case and what you can expect.
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Journal Reflection
Yerim Lee
I haven't negotiated much since I just graduated from university, but I'm learning a lot about how to negotiate through this class. Before negotiating, study in detail the person or company to negotiate first. I have to study what the other person is thinking. Draft negotiations in very detailed but simple sentences and prioritize key objectives. I can explain what I want only when I understand the other person in detail. When negotiations begin, I say what I want, figure out what the other person wants, and answer the questions calmly. I try to make the negotiations successful through additional questions, knowing that it is going well in my favor. I can't get everything I want by myself, so I have to talk to each other for a win-win. If the conversation proceeds to the side I don't want while negotiating, I have to respond strongly to the other person and express my opinion accurately.
"Negotiation technology is a unique property that helps two or more parties agree to a common logical solution." (Hbswk 2016)
I set my goals correctly and think about various options just in case. Don't underestimate yourself and try to give a good image to the other person. Don't get excited all the time and negotiate slowly through dialogue. Communication with each other is very important. Listen carefully to the end, judge slowly, and have a conversation without interrupting the other person's words. If I feel that negotiations are not going well, I look for other possibilities that help each other. I think I can give up something for the other person and there is no alternative. After negotiations are important to me, I should listen to the other person and not make a slip of the tongue because I can resolve many big and small disputes that can arise as things go on. An overly emotional conversation can ruin negotiations. Before negotiating, it is important to make a good strategy and say only what is necessary. It allows creative problems to be solved through a lot of research.
"Negotiations are ubiquitous, because they are used to perform many important tasks, including trading, dispute resolution, resource allocation, decision-making, and problem resolution." (Indeed 2022)
I improved a lot on my own by practicing and studying negotiation skills through this class. Through various preparations, I fully think about the other person's perspective and limitations and explain my influence and strengths to them. I am shy when I meet people for the first time, but I have to show an aggressive communication style when negotiating. A passive communication style has many difficulties when negotiating. My communication style was made up of Commander. When I negotiate, I only give my opinion when necessary and listen to them deeply. However, if the other person has a conflicting conversation, I think they will quickly express my opinion and compromise with each other. I don't think I'm inclined to do a lot of analysis, so I'm fixing that part. I'm practicing making schedules, researching and analyzing the other person, and making creative strategies. You should always be prepared to plan the future and to negotiate successfully.
My advertising company will use the principles and interests of the other parties to reach an agreement through principled negotiations. An advertising contract is a written agreement between the person who wants to advertise and the company that provides advertising space. My company will run both online and offline. In particular, since more negotiations are made online and contracts are made online without looking at people, a lot of research is needed before deciding on a contract.
Reference
Hbswk (2016)
Indeed(2022)https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/negotiation-skills
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Tips for Managing Conflicts
The article is from Clarke University giving tips on how to manage conflict, it is intended mainly to students to have a good and smooth campus life. The tips that are stated in this article were a lot, but they can be easily remembered and were not complicated.
For students, this will be helpful because conflict is unavoidable so they must learn how to handle it; it can not be resolved unless addressed with appropriate individuals involved. Conflicts inevitably arise in people's daily lives. And when problems do occur, the goal is to effectively address and manage them rather than trying to prevent them. People can prevent their disagreements from developing into serious issues by using the proper conflict resolution methods. The first thing that students must need to learn is to accept conflict. Conflict presents an opportunity for growth, new knowledge, and increased communication as well as an indication that something must change.
The important part of this is students should know how to communicate, open communication is key in dispute. It is expressing how will student feel about the situation and sticking to the facts will let the other person know that they are genuine with their actions. All parties involve in a conflict must discuss their interests or the reasons behind their views to resolve the conflict to create a solution that satisfies the shared interests, it’s a must to communicate the genuine motivation and collaborate. Students frequently like sleeping, studying, having fun, and unwinding in a cozy setting. They frequently have interests that are more ethereal, like respect, belonging, companionship, and enjoyment. Discussing the contrasts in people's lifestyles, values, and schedules is essential for handling conflict when those people are different. You must create a fair strategy of compromise that serves the interests of all parties. Focusing on the problem at hand and not what the other person did will avoid unnecessary conflict. Students should also know how to listen what the other person has to say, without interrupting it is important to defuse the situation and seek solutions to a conflict. After school, students will eventually work and will meet a lot of people with different beliefs, understanding, race, etc. and resolve conflict in a more professional way it is best to clarify what is the source of conflict to understand how the issue came to grow in the first place, learn how to agree to disagree, each person has a unique point of view and rarely agrees on every detail. Being right is not what is important. It is also good for students to be creative; it takes imagination and perseverance to find a solution to the issue that pleases everyone. Be careful not to give in just to keep peace or put an end to a disagreement. Too early agreements typically do not hold up. Create absurd possibilities to get your mind to start working "outside the box" of established viewpoints. Lastly, is to focus on the future, individuals tend to remember everything that ever bothered them about a person. Some people in conflict need to vent about the past but they often dwell on it. Recognizing that you must make a strategy to handle the current conflict and those that may emerge in the future, regardless of the past, is frequently the best way to take responsibility for the issue.
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Contested Divorce In Ga
Handled everything professionally and in a great timely matter. Very grateful I selected this legislation agency contested divorce to assist me with my divorce. A divorce becomes contested when the spouses do not agree on a quantity of features of the divorce.
Find the related info and share it to a degree that both events can achieve comfort that they understand what they're dividing and the place they're headed. For cases involving emotional challenges, the path in direction of resolution can be harder. Fortunately, there are a number of choices to resolve disputed points within a divorce in formal and casual ways including settlement conferences, mediation, and either early case and late case evaluations. Once the divorce petition is filed with the courtroom, your legal professional should make positive that your spouse is served the petition as properly. This is normally handled in person, by mail, by publication, or by a authorized representative. It is the accountability of the partner serving the petition that the opposite partner receives it.
If negotiations are a success, your lawyer prepares a divorce settlement settlement and information it with the proper court. Divorce mediation is an alternative to conventional divorce litigation. In a divorce mediation session, a mediator facilitates the discussion between the 2 parties by assisting with communication and offering info and ideas to help resolve differences. At the top of the mediation course of, the separating events have usually developed a tailored divorce settlement that can be submitted to the courtroom. Some mediation companies, corresponding to Wevorce, additionally pair purchasers with counselors, financial planners and different professionals to work through frequent mediation sticking factors.
The starting levels of the divorce process in New York state could be the most important. It is crucial to obtain as a lot info concerning family funds as soon as you're considering divorce as things tend to disappear as quickly as it's clear that divorce is on the horizon. If the divorce came as a surprise to you, you might have to act quick to protect monetary paperwork and information, in addition to your access to it.
If submitting for a contested divorce, working with an attorney is absolutely important. If your case had been to go to court docket, your legal professional can be liable for representing you and litigating in your behalf. In this case, since each parties agree to the phrases, it doesn’t should go to trial, which suggests your lawyer won’t need to obtain discovery, file subpoenas, or perform different lengthy legal procedures.
This could make spouses afraid to surrender any ground, and even less more doubtless to attain a compromise. Divorce could be a difficult and painful occasion, an uprooting of the life that two spouses have built together. Contested and uncontested divorce in Bergen County have completely different implications for divorcing spouses in the time and expense required for every. In a contested divorce, husband and spouse disagree considerably over some and even all aspects of custody, property or help contested divorce, and so they show little willingness to provide on their respective positions. In this situation, decision won't be swift and will require a full trial before a household court docket decide who will determine all disputed points. Brooklyn divorce lawyer Karen Goldberg Sager is conscious of the way to get her purchasers what they need in a contested divorce.
There’s often “collateral damage” in a long, drawn-out divorce, too, and it can have a negative impression on children. A contested divorce is one where the two events don’t agree on essential points, similar to how contested divorce to divide debts within the divorce, child custody and different things. In an uncontested divorce, the events agree on most of the main points and may transfer ahead – all they need is for the choose to sign the decree.
Sara could be very easy and skilled whereas additionally being personable and pleasant to deal with. In a divorce, what was as soon as referred to as "ours" splits into "his" and "hers." While you can simply agree to not live collectively, what's going to occur to the things you've labored so onerous to acquire? Dividing the marital assets could be probably the most troublesome duties in a divorce. Read tips on how to divide pretty and allow your divorce to go more easily.
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Void - Part 7 (M)
title banner by @rude–jude♡
Genre: Sci-fi with a little angst and a LOT of smut
Pairing: BTS x Reader (yup - all seven)
Summary: You are the only female crew member on a 12 year space mission with seven handsome men. The sexual tension is real, y’all.
Word Count: 10.9k
Part 7 / ?
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6
Warnings: explicit sexual content, alcohol masturbation, voyeurism, more non-monogamy
The men at the table stare at you, dumb-founded. Jungkook’s mouth hangs open. Hoseok hides his mouth behind his hand; his eyes are wide with shock. Jimin spins around, trying to gauge the others’ reactions. Namjoon leans back in his chair, face unreadable, his chin resting on his hand as he looks from you to your powerpoint. Jin laughs uncomfortably then clears his throat and silence falls again.
Yoongi speaks first. “You put sources on your powerpoint about how we should all start fucking?”
“It’s important to cite your sources,” you mutter, shuffling your feet.
Taehyung sits up straighter on his cot. “Are you saying we should start fucking you or each other?”
“Well, the bonobos do both. They are fully bisexual. Almost all aggressive contests are settled by sex. Even when two males squabble over a female, they often resolve it by rubbing their genitals together.”
“What?” Hoseok injects. “You want us to start rubbing our genitals together?” His cheeks blush.
“No, no, no.” You shake your head. “I meant you all should have sex with me.” Your own cheeks heat up as you say it. “I can’t control what you do with other people. In an ideal world, it would be both. But it seemed best to start with me.”
Jungkook mouths the words “start with” to himself, still staring at the table.
“But like, how would that work logistically?” Taehyung asks.
“Well, there are seven of you, so that could be like one per day. Take a week off for my period.”
Jimin splutters, whirling to face Yoongi. “Did you put her up to this?”
Yoongi shakes his head, frowning.
“No one put me up to this!” you argue. “This is what I think is best for the mission.”
An explosion of opinions pours out of all the men at once. Hoseok is swearing under his breath. Taehyung is trying to get Jimin’s attention, but Jimin is arguing with Yoongi. Jungkook wants to know how you decide who goes first. Jin says something to Namjoon that you can’t hear.
“So, um…” You struggle to regain command of the room over the chatter. “My period starts tomorrow, so take a few days to think about it.”
“Officer.” Namjoon’s deep voice cuts over everyone else and the conversation at the table ceases. “You and I need to speak privately. Now.”
The commander stands up from the table and gestures toward the door. The rest of the crew looks back and forth between the two of you wearing expressions of shock and confusion.
You avoid their gazes as you follow Namjoon’s direction out into the hallway. He steps out after you, closing the door behind him. A flurry of chatter resumes after the door shuts, but it’s too muffled to hear what the rest of the crew are saying. You and Namjoon stare at each other.
“So…” you say, shifting your weight between your feet.
“Let’s talk in my office,” he says, squeezing past you and moving in the direction of the sleep pods.
You examine him from behind as you follow him to his office, trying to gauge what he’s thinking. Are his shoulders tense? Is he angry with you? Are you about to be scolded?
His office is also his bedroom. And you did just offer to fuck him, no strings attached. But of all your crew, Namjoon is the one that you have the most strictly professional relationship with. His walls are almost as impenetrable as yours. But he is a man, right? And men like sex, right? It would have been more awkward to not include him. This wasn’t about personal feelings. It was about the mission. And you were all in the mission together.
________
Sweat pools at the base of your spine under the hot studio lights. A reporter drums her long red nails on her clipboard as the sound technician adjusts the microphones between interviews.
Press junkets are your least favorite part of the job, made all the worse by your mission director insisting you all dress in full launch gear, despite the launch still being two weeks away.
“This is the last one.” Namjoon turns around from his front and center seat to whisper to the rest of the crew.
Yoongi groans, rubbing his face with his hands. “Why do we have so many of them when they all ask the same questions?”
The eight of you have been trapped in this room all day as a parade of different reporters trail in and ask the same inane questions.
This new reporter opens with a softball. “How’s the food?”
“Good!” Namjoon patiently answers this question for the third time today. “The ICSE has recruited the top food scientists to figure out which foods hold their flavor and nutrition best in long term storage. And our chief botanist here is going to keep us well stocked with fruits and vegetables. Right, officer?” He gestures for you to chime in.
“Yup!” You are grateful to Namjoon for pitching you a question that isn’t about you being the only woman in a crew full of men. You’ve already had to explain how periods in space work twice today (short answer: pretty much the same way they work on Earth). “We have lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, peas, bean, soy, carrots, cabbage, chilis, potatoes, lemons, oranges and strawberries, plus a bunch of fresh herbs. They even found a way for us to grow mushrooms out of our culinary compost.”
The reporter makes a disgusted face at the idea of compost mushrooms and pivots to a new line of questioning. “What will you miss most about home?”
“Why don’t we go around the group?” Namjoon prompts. Even your commander seems to be fading in enthusiasm by this point. “I’m going to miss long walks in the fresh air, and my family, of course.”
Most of the crew answers with some variation of friends and family. Yoongi will miss his brother’s cooking. Taehyung will miss his dog who is going to live with his parents. Jungkook will miss long showers and his mom.
“What’s one personal item you’re taking with you?” she asks.
Namjoon is bringing a Chinese elm bonsai tree that he calls his tiny friend. Hoseok is bringing a stuffed Earth plushie given to him by his niece. Jin is bringing vodka.
The reporter narrows her eyes at the mention of alcohol and leans forward. “So what do you do if you feel a crew member’s judgement has been compromised?”
“We have protocols in place,” Namjoon answers. “Tests of cognitive impairment and such. We’re also coached in what we call “expeditionary behaviors” which are key to maintaining peace and cooperation on board.
Yoongi chimes in. “The key to solving all disputes is our ability to be honest with each other. When there is a problem, we sit down as a group and discuss it.”
“Our readers are saying what a tragedy it is that we are shipping seven of our most eligible bachelors off to space for a decade.” She laughs. “Any broken hearts being left here on Earth?”
“Oh!” Namjoon draws back and looks unsuredly at the rest of the group. This was not a question he was expecting to be asked today. “Umm…” he laughs nervously.
“My mom is devastated!” Jin cracks from the back row and the rest of the crew laughs in relief.
But the reporter doesn’t want to let go of this idea so quickly, so she turns to you. “Well, you must certainly enjoy having such handsome crew members.”
“Uh…” To your complete mortification, you actually blush in response. You clench your fist to try to get a grip. To your right, Hoseok’s hand flinches, as if he can feel the need to hold you back. “I’m going on this mission to find life on other planets.” You grit your teeth. “My only interest in my crew is whether or not they do their jobs.”
The woman shakes her head, laughing. “Doesn’t hurt that they look good doing it.”
_______
Namjoon opens the door to his office and gestures for you to enter. The number of papers on his desk seems to have multiplied, which theoretically shouldn’t be possible.
“I’m going to say three words to you,” Namjoon says as he closes the door behind him. “And then I need you to repeat them back to me: banana, river, finger.”
“Namjoon,” you cross your arms. “I’m not cognitively impaired right now.”
He mirrors your closed stance. “Please repeat the words.”
You sigh. “Banana, river, finger.”
He pulls a piece of paper from his desk and wipes it clean, before handing it to you, along with a pen. “I need you to draw a clock face.”
“Seriously?”
“Set it to quarter past eight.”
“This isn’t necessary, commander,” you grumble as you take the pen and paper, drawing a rudimentary clock face and setting the hands to 8:15. “See?” You hand the paper back to him and he inspects it.
He nods, rubbing his chin. “Repeat the three words again.”
“Banana, river, finger.” You put your hands on your hips. “You think my judgement is compromised?”
Namjoon sighs. “Everything seems to be in order. You must admit, your behavior recently has been uncharacteristic to say the least. Are you sure everything is okay?”
“Well, no, everything is not okay, that’s why I’m doing this.”
He leans against his desk, looking you up and down. “I fail to see how fraternizing with the entire crew will improve things.”
The back of your neck heats up in embarrassment, but you press on. You need the commander to be onboard with your plan.
“You admit we have a morale problem, right?”
He nods. “Hard to suggest otherwise. What with all the recent events.”
“Okay, so I was going through the principles of expeditionary behavior last night as I figured out what to do. Principle One: Communication - talk so you are clearly understood, talk about intentions before taking action, share information freely.”
“I know the principles.” Namjoon interrupts.
“But don’t you see? That’s why I had to call the meeting. Why I had to get everything out in the open, share information freely.”
“That explains why you needed to inform the crew of your relationship with Jimin. It doesn’t explain why you think it would be good to involve everyone.”
“Principle Two: Self-care - manage psychological and physiological health, balance work, rest, and personal time, be proactive to stay healthy and mitigate stress.”
Namjoon arches an eyebrow. “A lack of sex doesn’t damage your health.”
“With all due respect commander, I think it does.”
“There are outlets to relieve sexual urges other than exploiting our only female crew member.”
“Well, they were all trading porn with each other. That’s how this whole thing started.” Namjoon purses his lips in thought. That seems to be new information to your commander. You continue your argument. “Principle Three: Team-care - monitor team for signs of stress and fatigue - which we have a multitude of, cooperate rather than compete, encourage participation in team activities.”
“Are you considering this a team activity?”
“Well, yes. Like the bonobos do.”
Namjoon shakes his head. “Let me speak so I am clearly understood. I can’t prevent you or the rest of the crew from doing what you want to do with your personal time. But I can’t participate in it either. I’m the commanding officer on this ship. It’s inappropriate. We can’t have an equitable relationship.”
“That’s why it’s not a relationship though, it’s just sex. And if everyone involved is consenting...”
He rubs the back of his neck. “Let’s be honest about intent for a minute. Is that really what you want? You want all seven of us?”
“Umm…” Your stomach churns as you are unable to admit that, yes, that is what you want. “I think it’s best for the mission.”
“Part of principle three is to volunteer for unpleasant tasks if they benefit the team. Are you sure that’s not what you’re doing right now, officer?”
“Yes, I’m sure.” Though embarrassing to admit, boning your attractive colleagues is not an unpleasant task in the slightest.
“You should also consider the fact that whatever forms do get signed will have to be sent back to mission control. And may get out to the press.”
“I thought HR decisions were confidential.”
“Juicy stories have a tendency to find their way out. Especially when they distract from failed missions that added years on to our trip.”
“I understand, commander. Information must be shared freely. I still think this plan is necessary if we’re going to complete this mission successfully.”
“Okay.” Namjoon sighs, dropping his hands to his sides. “It would seem there is no talking you out of it.”
“No, sir. I intend to implement with full commitment.”
The two of you stare at each other for a minute. An immovable object and an unstoppable force.
“So… should I go?”
“Yes, you’re dismissed.”
________
After the press junket is mercifully over, Hoseok catches you in the hallway.
“Hey, you coming to Tae and Jimin’s quarantine party tonight?” Tonight is the last night you all are allowed to see other people before you enter your two-week quarantine prior to launch. “Seems like you could use a drink.”
“I don’t know,” you sigh, leaning against the wall.
“What’s on your mind?” He leans next to you.
“That last reporter, she got in my head.” You rub your forehead.
Hoseok rubs the back of his neck. His jawline tenses as he mulls over what to say.
Hoseok is so handsome. And smart. And newly single. He broke up with his girlfriend a couple of weeks ago before signing the final mission papers. And now he was going to be the one of only seven people in your whole world.
In another life, you would want to date him. You’d be dying to go to a party with him and plot how to get him alone for part of the evening. In another life, you would have fallen in love with him. But in this life, he’d been dating someone else for the whole time you’ve known him. And you have a mission.
What’s most grating is that the gossip columnist isn’t wrong. You’d be hard pressed to find a better set of men anywhere on Earth than the seven you were leaving with. They were all attractive, smart, kind, disciplined, athletic young men. It would be much easier to be entirely professional if you had a crew of balding middle-aged men.
“Do you think it's a mistake? Me going on this mission?” you finally ask.
“What?” Hoseok gasps. “No! Why would you think that?”
“The mission director said it was supposed to be only men. That mixed gender crews are too complicated.”
“Have we ever done anything to make you feel like we don’t view you as a professional?”
“No, no, of course not.” Other than being ridiculously good-looking.
Hoseok’s fingers twiddle nervously. “And we won’t. We’re a team. You’re our colleague. This mission is so much bigger than any one of us. And you’re the best candidate for this position.”
“I’m the only candidate.”
Hoseok smiles. “Well, that’s exactly my point. We’d be lost without our biologist. Besides, you were better than all the male candidates even before they dropped out.”
“You don’t know that.”
“Oh yes, I do. Are you forgetting how badly you kicked my ass all over organic chemistry? And I was the chem major! It was such a disgrace.” You both laugh.
You smile at the memory: early morning study sessions, Hoseok bringing you coffee in exchange for your homework help.
“Come on,” he insists. “I know you. You can’t not go. You’re going to be the first woman on Europa. It’s been your destiny since college. Don’t you want to see it with us?”
Yes, you wanted to see it so badly. You picture the two of you looking out over the icy surface together.
“Come tonight.” Hoseok insists. “It’ll be fine, you’ll see. We won’t mess this up for you.”
“Thank you, Hoseok.”
_______
You leave Namjoon’s bedroom and climb into your own sleep pod, the question of what mission control or the press know about what’s happening on this ship weighing on your mind.
Unfortunately, googling it for yourself won’t work. It takes between 10 and 20 minutes for a single signal to get from your ship to Earth, depending on exactly where you both are in your orbits. Then it takes another 10-20 minutes to return. Usually if you wanted to research something, you’d submit a formal request to your research assistants back on Earth, who would gather a collection of relevant documents for you and send you a bundle of them all at once. But asking your research assistants to assemble a dossier on your rumored sex life was out of the question. You need someone you can trust.
You pull out your laptop and compose the following email.
Hi Dianna,
How are you doing? I’m sorry I’ve been slow to respond to your messages lately, things have been a bit messy out here. I was wondering if I could ask you a favor. Are there rumors about my personal life going around the ICSE? Or in the press? I was wondering if you’d be willing to run a quick google search and let me know what you find.
Thank you! I hope you and Melissa are doing well.
Dianna should have been on this mission with you. You wish you could talk to her in person. You’ll have to send her a video message when you have more time. But you are interrupted in your thoughts by a knock on the door.
“Who is it?”
“Jimin.”
You hit send on the email and open the door.
“Can we talk?” he asks.
You nod and stand to one side to allow him into your pod.
He sighs and rubs the back of his neck. “So I’m confused.” He runs a hand through his hair as he steps into the pod. “Last night you were mad at me for suggesting you date Taehyung. You said you wouldn’t be passed around between crew members. But now you want to have sex with the entire crew?”
“I’m not being passed around. This is my plan. I’m in control.”
He shakes his head. “The end results seem to be the same though. I don’t understand.”
“This way we don’t have to pretend this is something it’s not. It can just be sex, just release. We don’t have to pretend it means anything more than that.”
“But it means something to me.” Jimin frowns. “I have feelings for you.”
You sigh. “They’re not real though. It’s hormones and boredom. It’s just because I’m the only woman here.”
“No it’s not!”
“Yes it is! You didn’t feel this way about me on Earth, right?”
Jimin stammers for a minute. “People can change. Relationships can change.”
“Jungkook and Taehyung didn’t have feelings for me on Earth either and now that they’ve seen me naked they’re suddenly 'in love' with me. That’s not real. That’s just biology. We’re just apes in space with too much time on our hands.”
“Jungkook’s in love with you too?”
“I don’t know. He thinks he is.”
Jimin frowns, but seems less sure of himself. “Is this because I suggested sharing? Cause that was a dumb idea and I take it back.”
“No! You were right. It’s what’s best for the mission.”
“So what? It’s like this or nothing? I have to share you to have any of you?”
You don’t answer him. Currently, no one else has actually signed, so Jimin might get you all to himself anyways.
“Am I… am I not enough?” Jimin asks. “I can be more. I can do better. I can do whatever Yoongi does that you like so much.”
“This isn’t about Yoongi. It’s about the mission.”
“You said you liked me. You said you wanted to be with me. Was that just about the mission?”
“It’s not about what I want.”
“Yeah, yeah… it's about the mission.”
He turns to go, but you catch his hand in yours. His thumb rubs across the back of your hand. All the men are just as touch-starved as you are. It’s probably unfair that you are playing to that now.
You see an idea flash across his face right before he scoops you up into his arms, kissing you passionately. “I’m going to show you,” he whispers between kisses. “I’m going to show it's real. I’m going to be what you need. My feelings are real.”
Then he places you back down and leaves. You lean against the door breathless.
________
Mistake number one: You should not have challenged Jin to beer pong.
Mistake number two: You should not have said goodbye to your parents and dog right before going to a party full of strangers and booze.
Mistake number three: You should not have gone to find Hoseok when you are this drunk and he smells that good.
You collapse onto the couch beside Hoseok, too tired to stand up anymore. Hoseok smiles to see you, face flushed red.
“Hoseok,” you whisper, even though he’s already looking at you. “Hoseok, I have something important to tell you.”
He leans in closer. “Yeah?”
“Europa’s oceans are ninety-six kilometers deep.”
He laughs. “Of course, I know that! I wrote my graduate thesis on Europa’s oceans!”
“Yeah, but like…” You wave your hand. “That’s like soooo deep. Like not intuitive, you know? Like that’s ten times deeper than any ocean on Earth. I can’t even conceive of how deep our oceans are, let alone Europa’s.”
You scoot closer to him on the couch. “That’s like…” You pull out your phone to do some basic math. “That’s like 120 Burj Khalifas!!”
Hoseok nods. “Yes… It is super deep.”
“Stacked on top of each other!” You slap your knee in emphasis.
“Yes, I know!” He laughs again.
You sigh. “Can I tell you a secret?” You lean in closer and put a hand on his thigh. He leans in too. “There just has to be life down there. I know there has to be.”
“I hope so.” He rests his hand on yours.
“We’re going to find it together, you and I.” You grab his hand and squeeze it.
Hoseok looks down at your joined hands and you worry that maybe you’ve gone too far. Maybe tomorrow this will be an awkward and embarrassing moment. But right now it feels nice. His hand is warm. You wonder if it would be too much to lean your head on his shoulder.
But then Hoseok’s phone buzzes in his lap. His ex-girlfriend’s name flashes across the screen and you drop his hand.
“Sorry,” he mutters, getting up off the couch. “I should take this.” He leaves and the couch next you is colder.
“Hey!” Jin stumbles over to your seating area. “Have any of you guys seen Namjoon?”
“I think he went to meet that girl he won’t tell us about,” Yoongi answers from a chair a few feet away. When did Yoongi get here?
“So everyone is getting laid tonight, huh?” Jin laughs.
“Not everyone,” Yoongi mutters, nursing his beer.
“Don’t be such a grump, Yoongi. It’s basically our last night on Earth! Take advantage!” Jin laughs before wandering back into the crowd.
“I’m not getting laid tonight either!” You yell across the room at Yoongi. More direct than you would be when sober.
He cracks the first smile you’ve seen from him in days, raising his beer into the air in a little clinking motion. You do the same with your plastic cup full of what Jimin had described as “Tae’s jungle juice”. It was red and smelled like tequila.
“Why aren’t you getting laid?” you ask, taking a swig of the juice for courage.
“Got dumped, not really over it yet,” he answers matter-of-factly. “What about you?”
You shrug. “The only men here are about to be my only companions for the next twelve years. Seems like a bad plan to fuck them.”
Yoongi laughs. “Suppose so.”
“Well, don’t you worry. If that reporter is right, we’ll all be having space orgies in a month anyways.”
Yoongi chokes on his beer. “Shit.” Beer dribbles down his chin as he laughs. “I think we need to find you some ice water and a cab.”
“Probably a good plan,” you mutter as you lie down on the couch and close your eyes.
________
When you wake up in the morning, there are still no signed HR forms in your messages. Had you been a fool to think any of them were interested? How much time does it take to decide such a thing? Perhaps by putting the idea out there explicitly, it had lost all of its taboo appeal.
There are two other things waiting for you to notice though: your period and a calendar reminder that today is chili pepper pollinating day. After dealing with the first of those problems in the bathroom, you head for the lab to find Hoseok.
You find the science officer in the lab as always, sitting with his knee tucked up against his chest.
“Hey, um…” You shuffle your feet. Want to fuck me? No wait…
He blinks at you, bleary-eyed.
“Oh, you don’t look good. Were you here all night?” you ask.
“Um, was I? Yeah. I suppose. Lost track of time.” He rubs his eyes, before looking you up and down, then casting his gaze back to the floor.
All you want to do is ask about the forms. Or the meeting. Or what he thinks of you now. But you don’t.
“I need to pollinate the chili peppers today.” Usually Hoseok is the person who assists with that. “But I can get one of the other guys to do it if you need the sleep.”
“No!” Hoseok lurches forward, standing up a bit too rapidly and needing to put his hand back on the bench to steady himself. “I mean, I’m fine.”
You should disagree with him. He is exhausted. But you’d like more time to talk to him.
Pollinating the chili peppers is both time-sensitive and time-consuming, hence why it took two of you to get the job done. There were no insects on your ship to do the job for you and if the plants didn’t get pollinated, they wouldn’t bear any fruit. Chili peppers were your favorite crop. Not only a vital source of Vitamin C, but all your food benefitted from having a bit of spice added to it.
You and Hoseok head for the greenhouse together. The initial set-up gives you something to talk about in the beginning. Hoseok gathers the pollen from one flower onto a paintbrush, then hands it over to you to paint onto the stigmas of each little flower on the next plant.
Slowly the conversation dries up as you fall into a silent rhythm. Other than enjoying the chili peppers, this was also one of your favorite tasks on the ship because of the high likelihood that the two of you would brush hands periodically. It always gave you butterflies. But today he seems extra intent on keeping his distance from you. Was he disgusted by you now? His hands are trembling.
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
His hand twitches so hard that a little rain of yellow pollen cascades onto the floor. He curses in frustration before turning to face you. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
"I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“This, um, plan of yours…” he gestures to the vague tension in the air. “It doesn’t feel like you.”
“I’m trying to save the mission. That has always been my top priority.”
“Yeah, I’m still not clear on how this benefits the mission.”
“I outlined it all in my presentation. Plus Yoongi said…” you start to say, but are cut off by Hoseok's derisive snort.
“Look, if you’re in love with Yoongi, go date him, okay? Don’t feel obligated to include the rest of us out of pity.”
You frown. “I’m not… I’m not in love with him. It’s just sex. Just biology.”
“This isn’t you!” Hoseok argues back. “You hated the idea of anyone ever treating you that way. And now you want all of us to… to… use you like that?” He splutters out the end of the sentence.
“No one is using me! This is my plan!”
He sighs. “Well, I can’t be a part of it. Excuse me.” He leaves you alone in the greenhouse.
Your lower lip trembles and you bite it to stop it. He’s disgusted by you. Yoongi was wrong; Hoseok doesn’t want you. It takes you the rest of the day to finish the pollinating on your own.
_____
There are no forms waiting for you when you wake up the next morning either. Perhaps this was a mistake after all. If the men aren’t looking for release in the same way you are, then there’s no point to any of this. Even Jimin has been keeping his distance, so all you’ve done is mess up the one relationship you did have and offend your commander and colleagues.
Your tablet buzzes with a notification. It’s a reply from Dianna.
It’s great to hear from you! I hope things aren’t too crazy up there. I haven’t heard any rumors at work, but I’ve not been directly involved with your mission. We’ve started the plans for Titan and it’s taking most of my focus. I can ask around though if you want me to. I was surprised to find this article when I googled. Is this accurate? I assumed you would have said something.
Hope you are well! Melissa and I are going to send you a video of our new puppy.
Dianna
There is a pdf of a magazine article attached to the email entitled “Love Amongst the Stars”. At the top is one of the official launch photos of the whole crew that has been zoomed and cropped so that it’s only you and Jimin sitting next to each other. The tagline reads “How two astronauts had to leave Earth to find each other”. It makes you cringe so hard you have to put the tablet down for a minute before you can read on.
It’s some sort of fluff piece about a secret affair between you and the mission specialist. You scan the article, trying to figure out what they know. “A source close to the couple spoke with us...” Who is their source? You haven’t told anyone on Earth about what's going on with Jimin.
“Coworkers said they always sensed a special connection between the two…” This is nonsense. Jimin is one of the crew members you knew the least about prior to launch.
“Other crew members are very supportive…” Uh, sure.
“Maybe we’ll even get our first space wedding…” You groan out loud, closing the pdf.
Maybe that seals it then. You’ll just be space-married to Jimin for the next 12 years and that will be that. The idea makes you feel a bit claustrophobic in your tiny sleep pod, so you throw on your exercise clothes and head for the gym to try to clear your head.
_____
What you call “the gym” is actually just a bunch of resistance bands and cardio equipment stashed into the walls of one corner of the hangar. When the gravity was off, you had a variety of different choices for which equipment to use. There was a treadmill in the ceiling and an elliptical in the wall so multiple people could use the equipment in your off hours. But with the gravity on, the stationary bike on the floor is your only option.
As you begin your warm-up on the bike, you mull over your next move. Why hadn’t any of the other men come and talked to you yet? Jungkook had confessed to you, why wasn’t he signing up now? And Yoongi? Yoongi said he wanted a form only a few days ago. Why did it feel so different now?
Were you stupid? Had you embarrassed yourself in front of your entire crew for no reason? Maybe Namjoon and Hoseok were right and this was a bad plan. You pedal faster, trying to burn out some of the tension in your lungs.
The radio buzzes and Taehyung’s deep voice sounds in your in-ear. “Looking for a location for our biologist.”
“I’m in the gym,” you radio back, pausing your bike ride to catch your breath.
Moments later, Taehyung pokes his head in the door of the hangar. It’s good to see him up and about, even if his arm is still in a sling.
“Hey.” He steps into the room, adjusting his hair with his one good hand. “I need to talk to you about this, um, ape sex thing.”
Oh my gosh, is it finally happening? Maybe Jimin was right. Maybe Taehyung is more interested in you than you had realized. He fishes into his pocket and pulls out his tablet. You wish you weren’t so sweaty and gross for this conversation. Taehyung is such an intimidatingly attractive man.
Taehyung opens up the tablet and flips to the form as he walks closer to you. It’s happening. He’s going to sign the form. Shit. Then what will you do? It’s one thing to say you want to have sex with your whole crew, but what if he’s hoping to go right now? You need a shower.
Taehyung has nice hands. Long strong fingers delicately navigate the touch screen. It seems totally improbable that a man this attractive would be into you, even if you were the only woman in the universe. It adds to your suspicions that hormones are driving everyone crazy. Perhaps if you slept with him once, he’d lose all interest.
He finds the form and then turns his gaze up to you, staring you down with those eyes. It’s a good thing Taehyung rarely turns his full gaze on you, because it is almost too much to bear. Shit, is he going to sign it? Is he waiting for you to give him some sort of signal?
“You can’t do this to Jimin,” he says.
“What?” Not what you were expecting. “Do what to Jimin?”
“This.” He gestures over the HR form. “Signing these forms with everyone. Having sex with everyone. You’re going to destroy Jimin.”
“Jimin’s the one who suggested this whole thing in the first place.” It’s a lie. You know it's a lie. Or at least a gross exaggeration. But Jimin was the one who first brought up the idea of sharing. All for the benefit of the man in front of you now.
“No way.” Taehyung scoffs, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow. “No way was it Jimin’s idea that you sleep with the whole crew.”
“Well…” You can’t bear his gaze anymore and look down at the floor. “He wanted me to sleep with you.”
“What?” He puts down the tablet. “Why would he want that?”
“He, um…” You rub your arm. “He thinks you’re in love with me.”
“What?” There is only surprise on Taehyung’s face. It’s actually a relief to see that Taehyung is as shocked by that idea as you were. “Why does he think that?”
“I don’t know…” You feel kind of dumb now. Of course, Taehyung doesn’t feel that way about you. Look at him. “Cause you told him you were jealous. Cause you can’t stand to be in the same room as us.”
Taehyung bites his lip. “Oh, um, shit, sorry, that’s not what I meant.”
“What did you mean?” you ask. If Taehyung wasn’t jealous of Jimin, then...“Who are you jealous of?”
“Nevermind…” Taehyung stumbles backward, putting his tablet back in his pocket. “Forget I said anything.”
“No wait,” you get up off the bike to chase after him, catching by the sleeve. As he turns around, you make a show of turning off your microphone. He does the same. “Are you jealous of me?” you ask. “Do you like Jimin?”
Taehyung’s eyes widen and he bites his lip. He glances toward the camera in the corner of the room, then stands up and begins unzipping his jumpsuit.
“Um…” You are distracted by the golden arms that peak from either side of the tank top as the zipper reaches his groin. “What are you doing?”
“Need something to block the camera.”
“We have towels,” you mutter. But now he’s attempting to peel the tank top up over his head.
“Yeah, but this way anyone watching will think we’re having sex.” He answers. “Shit, can you give me a hand?” In his attempts to remove his shirt, he seems to have forgotten he is wearing the arm sling and is now stuck with his shirt over his head. His injured shoulder is black and blue from his accident with the ROV.
You gingerly try to disentangle him without getting too close to his warm, bare skin. You succeed in freeing him from his shirt and he tosses it up and over the camera.
“You want them to think we’re having sex?” you ask.
“Don’t you? It plays right into your whole ‘save the mission with bonobo sex’ plan.” He zips his jumpsuit back up as he turns around.
“I suppose.” Though the plan was also supposed to be that there would be no more secrets between the crew. “What plan of yours does it play into?”
“The one where Jimin doesn’t realize I’m in love with him.”
Of course, Taehyung is in love with Jimin. That makes so much more sense. They’ve been so close for so long. And Taehyung has always paid very close attention to anything going on with Jimin. “You’ve never tried to tell him?”
Taehyung laughs wryly and shakes his head. “How would that conversation go? Hey man, I know we’ve known each other for years and I’ve already seen you naked and that you just think of me as a friend, but I’m in love with you. I know that’s awkward but now you have to spend the next twelve years with me, knowing that I’m attracted to you when you don’t feel the same way.” Taehyung sighs. “Doesn’t sound like a good plan to me. If he doesn’t feel the same way, I’ve ruined the friendship for nothing and then I don’t even have that.”
“Yeah… I get that.” There’s something touching about realizing that Taehyung has been fighting the same battle as you for the last two years.
“I couldn’t tell anyone before launch because what if they wouldn’t let me go then? You know?”
“Yeah, the director wasn’t big on sending anyone who might ‘complicate’ the mission.” The two of you share a sad knowing smile.
“Yeah… And I thought it would be fine, you know? I like women too. I’d just date women until launch and no one would know. I wasn’t planning on falling in love with my roommate.”
“I don’t think any of us knew what this would be like.”
“I knew it was going to be a problem. I should have pulled out…” he continues.
Your mind flashes back to your own moment of doubt when Hoseok talked you into still coming on the mission.
Taehyung sighs and leans against the ice drill. “But I couldn’t just let him go off into space without me. Even if he’d never feel the same way, at least he’d still be in my life.”
The emotion in Taehyung’s words makes your eyes begin to mist. “You really love him.”
“Yeah,” Taehyung sighs again. “But he’s in love with you.”
“Well, he thinks he is.”
“What does that mean?”
“He only feels that way about me cause he thinks I’m the only option.” Maybe he would feel differently if he knew about Taehyung’s feelings.
Taehyung frowns and shakes his head. “You don’t give him enough credit.”
“Oh come on, you know him. How many women did he date while we were in training?”
“A few…”
“And how many of them was he in love with before he found the next one?”
Taehyung purses his lips. He can’t argue with that. “So why are you with him then, if you don’t think it’s real?”
You shrug, rubbing your arm. “I like him. Lord knows he’s attractive. And he wants me. It’s nice to feel wanted, I guess.”
“You could have that with any man on this ship though...”
You scoff. “They’re all suffering the same delusion. It’s only-available-vagina syndrome. I just want us all to fuck and get it out in the open. Maybe if we could get it out of our system, they would see I’m nothing special. And then we can get back to the mission.”
Taehyung eyes you up and down. “You don’t give yourself enough credit either.”
You shrug. “You wait and see. Jimin will get bored of me. They all will.”
Taehyung pulls his tablet back out of his pocket. “Do you really think that if everyone just like, banged it out, that it would help morale?”
“Well, it certainly couldn’t get any worse.”
“And Jimin thinks I’m in love with you?” He reopens the HR form and stares at it.
You nod.
“What if I signed this? And we let him think that for a little longer? Just until I figure out how to tell him the truth?
“Like we’d pretend the two of us are involved?” Maybe that would help you get the other men on board with your plan.
Taehyung nods. “Would that be okay?”
“Yeah, that would work.”
Taehyung smiles and signs the bottom of the form, then sends it to you. “Thank you,” he says before he leaves you to resume your workout.
______
Other than Taehyung, no one else approaches you over the next few days. If anything, the crew seems to be treating you more professionally than they did before you announced your plan to fuck them all. You have signed forms from Jimin and Taehyung and have been rejected by Namjoon and Hoseok, but you’ve heard nothing either way from the other three. What are they waiting for?
By the time you reach the end of the Monday morning weekly meeting, you’ve had enough waiting.
Namjoon finishes his debrief of the week’s goals and claps his hands. “Anyone have anything else mission related we need to discuss?”
“My period is over,” you announce to your assembled crew.
A muscle pulses in Namjoon���s jaw. “Officer, I wouldn’t consider that mission-related.”
You cross your arms and lean back in your chair. “Just freely sharing information.”
“Already?” Jungkook asks. “I thought you said it would take a week.”
“No, finished this morning. It varies a bit from cycle to cycle.” you answer. Hoseok’s leg begins aggressively bouncing up and down next to you, but you press on. “I need to make a schedule. So I need to know who’s in and who’s out.”
“Ooh, what if you shared out your tracker info so we’re all on the same page.” Taehyung enthuses.
Yoongi scoffs. “Why don’t we just add it to our mission task list then?”
“I’m not clear on why menstruating means we can’t have sex,” Jimin interjects.
“Enough!” Namjoon regains everyone’s attention. “We need clear boundaries between what is personal and what is professional. Right now, you all have jobs to do. Dismissed.”
________
By the time you finish your chores for the day, you have convinced yourself that getting the rest of the team on board is essential to your successful completion of the mission. So you go in search of Yoongi.
You find him in his workshop. Pieces of an air filter are spread out on the workbench and he’s in the middle of cleaning it. You had forgotten that is the actual purpose of the workbench. So much for climbing on top of it and seducing him that way.
He looks up when you enter and you decide to cut to the chase. “I haven’t gotten your HR form yet.”
“Yeah…” He goes back to inspecting the clogged tube in front of him.
“You said you wanted to sign one with me.”
“I did say that, yes.”
“And now you don’t?” You thought if anyone was going to be supportive of the plan, it would be Yoongi.
He sets down the part he had been inspecting. “Have you really thought this through?”
“Yes!” You put your hands on your hips. “I made a whole powerpoint! With sources!!”
“I think it's a bad plan.” He picks up another long tube full of dust and threads a brush through it.
“I thought you’d be onboard with this plan. You said if I was fucking everyone, there’s no need for jealousy.”
“Yeah, well, I was wrong.” He sets the tube down and turns around to look at you directly. “ Is that really what you want?”
Why is he questioning you now? He was the one who put this whole idea in your head. He was the one who knew all your fantasies. “But you said…"
“I know what I said.” He begins pacing back and forth in front of the workbench. “But there’s a difference between a fantasy and a reality. You really want to have sex with a different man every day for 12 years on some kind of rotating daily schedule? Like how we water the crops?”
“You’re mad there’s a schedule?” You try to come closer to him, but he backs away from you, turning back to the air filter.
“Sexual desire doesn’t run on a clock, you know,” he says as he starts to pack up the equipment. “What if you’re not feeling it that day? What if they’re not?”
“I’m just trying to be fair to everyone.”
“But nobody actually gets what they want!” He throws his hands up in exasperation.
“And what do you want, Yoongi?”
He pauses, then deflates, dropping his hands to his sides. “Nevermind, forget about it.” He grabs a wet wipe off the shelf and begins cleaning the dust of his hands, not looking at you.
“No!” He’s the one who has been egging you on this whole time. “You were the one who was all ‘you have to fuck Jimin to save the mission’. You said you didn’t care if I fucked Jimin too. What do you want from me, Min Yoongi?”
“I’m going to go get some dinner.” He mutters, throwing the dirty wipe in the trash and turning to leave.
Oh no. He’s not going to escape you that easily. You need some straight answers. “You started all this, Yoongi! You said every man on this ship wanted to fuck me and none of them do! What was that?” You follow him down the hall toward the kitchen.
He stops and turns around in the middle of the hall. “This isn’t all on me! You made choices too!”
“Because of what I thought you wanted!” you yell back. “What is your deal? First you want me to fuck you, then you dont. Then you want me to fuck everyone and then you don’t. What do you want from me?” Your voice is echoing down the hallway but you are way past caring about it.
Yoongi opens and closes his mouth, then spins back around and heads for the kitchen, with you trailing behind him.
Jungkook is sitting at the kitchen table with a bowl of ramen. He looks up, startled as the two of you barge in.
“And what about you?” You fire the question at your youngest crew member. “Don’t you want to fuck me?”
The poor boy nearly chokes on his noodles. “I, um…” He swallows, wide eyes glancing between you and Yoongi.
You lean against the table next to Jungkook as Yoongi steps around the two of you to head for the pantry, but you see his fist clench as he walks by. You lean closer to Jungkook. “Didn’t you enjoy my video? Don’t you want to see the real thing?”
“Uh...” Jungkook glances at Yoongi again. “Maybe the two of you should talk this out…”
Yoongi’s hands tremble, but he doesn’t turn around, intent on starting the rice cooker. You turn your focus to Jungkook instead. “This isn’t about him. Whatever the flight engineer wants to do is up to him. He knows where I stand. This is about you and I.” You are going to get a man on this ship to fuck you. Today.
“It’s not like I’m not interested…” Jungkook’s knee bounces up and down rapidly as he watches you. “But I told you I was in love with you and you literally had a panic attack.”
Oh right. That was back when you thought you still had a shot of stopping all this. Before half your crew had seen you naked. Before all of them had heard you having sex. Before you’d announced that you wanted all of them to fuck you. But you can still control this, if you can get them onboard with your plan.
Your tablet buzzes in your pocket. You pull it out to give yourself a moment to think. There’s a message from Jin.
Hey, come find me when you get this and we can talk. I’ll be in the kitchen.
You brace yourself for yet another rejection note. But you click on the attachment to instead find your HR form, Kim Seokjin’s signature scrawled right next to yours.
Holy shit. He signed it. Under no false pretenses. What do you do now?
“What is it?” Jungkook asks.
But then Jin appears in the doorway. He startles when he sees you. “Oh! I thought you’d still be on shift.”
You shake your head. “You signed the form.”
“What? He did?” Jungkook asks.
“Oh, um, yeah,” Jin answers, laughing nervously. “That’s what you wanted right?”
“Yes, that’s what I wanted.” You stand up and move closer to your pilot. Jungkook crosses his arms. Yoongi finally turns around to observe the three of you.
Jin. Jin with his broad-shoulders and plump lips. Your friend. Your very handsome friend. He’s going to help you save the mission.
“You’re the first one I’ve gotten, so you can go first.”
“Wait, what?” Jin stammers. “But you and the commander?”
You shake your head. “He didn’t sign.”
“You and Taehyung though? I saw him take off his shirt and then cover the camera.”
“Oh right… sorry… I guess you’re the second one. But Tae’s still on shift.”
“Don’t forget about Jimin.” Yoongi helpfully chimes in.
Jin takes a step backward. “But I thought for sure these two…” He gestures at the other two men in the kitchen.
“Nope,” you move toward him. “Not yet.” You suddenly see a way to get them all on board at once.
“Oh, well, um...” His ears are bright red. “Maybe we can talk more about this after dinner?”
“That’s one option…” You lick your lips and find the top of your zipper with your hand, blushing as the next part of your plan unfolds in your mind. “Or you could fuck me now.”
“What?”
“Holy shit.” Jungkook mutters beside you.
Jin dives around you, moving toward the other side of the kitchen. “There are people eating here!”
“Nothing they haven’t seen before.” You begin unzipping your jumpsuit in what you hope is a seductive manner, rolling your hips as you follow him across the kitchen. You have both Jungkook and Yoongi’s rapt attention.
You take a cue from Taehyung and peel off your tank top, throwing it over the camera behind you, leaving you in a bra and the bottom half of your jumpsuit. “Though if these two are going to stay and watch, they better sign the forms as well.”
“Stay and watch?” Jin swallows, hands clenched at his sides.
You grab the waist of your jumpsuit, teasing it down just slightly as you make direct eye contact with Jungkook and then Yoongi. “What do you think boys? In or out?”
Jungkook lunges for his tablet. A satisfying ping on your own tablet confirms that this plan is working. Yoongi just crosses his arms and leans back against the counter.
You drop the jumpsuit, leaving you in nothing but your bra and underwear. You prop yourself up on the kitchen table next to Jungkook’s now cold bowl of ramen.
“What are you doing?” Jin asks, whole face beginning to turn red.
“Look…” You shimmy out of your bra straps so that your bra is only held in place by your hand. “I’m going to need you to fuck me right here on this table, Kim Seokjin. For the good of the mission.”
“Why does putting your bare ass on the surface where we eat help the mission?!”
“No more secrets. No more jealousy. Everything will be out in the open. Like the bonobos do.”
Your fingers tease at the clasp of your bra. All three men stare at you. You lock eyes with Yoongi, daring him to look away. Implement with full commitment. You drop your bra to the floor.
“Stop, stop!” Jin moves toward you as you slide your fingers into the band of your underwear. “Just hang on for one second.” He picks up your jumpsuit from the floor and comes closer, draping it around your shoulders in an attempt to cover you. “Look at me.” He grasps your chin and turns your gaze to meet his. “Are you sure that’s what you want?”
You lick your lips. “Yes.”
He kisses you, hard. It’s aggressive, urgent even. His hands are on your shoulders, then sliding down your back, pulling you toward him. Your eyes close as you momentarily lose yourself in it. Despite you begging him for it, it still surprises you how insistent he is. His hands keep sliding down your back, until they reach your buttocks, running over the thin cotton of your underwear and scooping you into his arms. You wrap your arms around his shoulders for balance, and then he is lifting off the table.
He breaks out of the kiss to pick you up even higher and then proceeds to throw you over his shoulder.
“Jin! What are you doing?” You kick your feet into the air.
“I am a man, not an ape,” he says, picking up your jumpsuit and bra and tossing them over his other shoulder. “And if I’m going to fuck you, it’s going to be in the privacy of my own sleep pod, where the only man enjoying it is me.”
He hauls you ass first out into the hallway, with Jungkook and Yoongi both watching wide-eyed as you are carried away.
“I can walk,” you argue as Jin turns for the sleep pods.
“Nope,” replies Jin, readjusting you on his shoulder before carrying you down the hall.
As you reach the junction to the bridge, your ass runs into something warm and firm.
“What the-” says Namjoon. Your whole body flushes hot as you realize you’ve run butt-first into your commanding officer.
“Shit, sorry commander.” Jin laughs. “Excuse us,” Jin says and continues down the hallway, not setting you down or stopping.
Namjoon has pressed himself up against the wall with his hands in the air, a look of shock on his face. He looks like he is about to say something, but then Jin reaches his sleep pod and sets you down inside and you can’t see the commander anymore.
“Well, that was the best thing that has happened in a long time.” Jin chuckles as he closes the door. “The looks on Namjoon’s and Jungkook’s faces will power me for a year. You okay?” he asks, handing your bra and jumpsuit. “For the record, I’m not expecting anything else to happen here.”
“You don’t want to do anything else?” You hold up your jumpsuit to cover yourself, more disappointed than you would like to admit.
Jin eyes you up and down. “I mean… I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t interested, but that wasn’t my intention in bringing you here.”
“You hauled me half-naked to your bedroom and your intention wasn’t to have sex?”
“I know, I am such a gentleman, aren’t I?” He laughs, then shrugs. “Seemed like maybe you needed an out. Things were getting kind of crazy back there.”
“But you signed the form? Doesn’t that imply a sexual relationship?”
“I guess I’m not really a ‘sex in front of two other men before we’ve even been on a date’ kind of guy.”
“How about a ‘sex in the sleep pods’ kind of guy?”
“Are you even actually interested in me?” Jin asks, getting more serious. “Because none of what happened in the kitchen felt like it was about me. I don’t want to be some pawn in your plot to make Yoongi jealous.”
“It’s not about Yoongi!” You groan. “Why does everyone think this is about Yoongi?”
“Have you seen the two of you interact recently? There are some seriously repressed feelings going on there.”
You bang your head into the door of the sleep pod in frustration, before looking up at him. “You’re a very attractive man. Maybe I have feelings for you?”
He sighs. “Yeah, but you don’t. You can’t swap us out for each other.”
Shit. The way you’ve been treating the men is exactly how you feared they would treat you. While you fear being wanted because you’re the only woman, you’ve made all the men on the ship feel as though you think them interchangeable simply because they’re men.
“It never occurred to me that any of you would have real feelings for me.”
“Well, you are very dumb.”
“Hey…” You hit him gently on the chest. He catches your hand in his.
“Amazing they would trust such a crucial mission to someone who is so very stupid,” he teases, still holding your hand.
“I’m not this stupid about mission related stuff, just all this relationship crap.” You laugh softly.
“So tragic. Someone with so much training ought to have better sense.”
He squeezes your hand and you look into his eyes again. He smiles a soft reassuring smile and for the first time in weeks, you feel like maybe everything will be okay again at some point in the future.
“You’re a good man, Kim Seokjin.”
“Best man on the ship.” He chuckles.
“Kiss me again.”
He arches his eyebrows. “Why?”
“Because I want you to.”
“Are you sure?”
“Look there’s no one else here right? This is only about you. I want you.”
He kisses you again, tenderly this time. His warm arms wrap around and you realize you’re still naked except for your underwear. You curl into his embrace. He smells good, warm and manly, like good cologne. You run your hands over his muscular shoulders that you can feel through his clothes. It’s slow and leisurely, like you’re savoring each other.
“You sure you’re not a ‘sex in the sleep pods’ kind of guy?” You tease as you slide your thigh in between his legs and feel his erection pressing against you.
He groans, resting his head on your shoulder as you grind against him. “I’d like to think of myself as more of a ‘sex in the sleep pods after the third date’ kind of guy.”
You pause and look up at him surprised. “You want to go on a date?”
He nods. “At least three of them, in fact.”
You smile. “That would be nice. I’d like that.”
He kisses you behind your ear. “So are Mondays my day then? Can I take you on a date next Monday?”
You gasp as he rolls his hips against you, the heat of him seeping through his clothes. “That’s a long time to wait, especially if you’re going to make me wait through three of them.”
“I’m sure we can find other ways to entertain ourselves.” He cups your naked breast in his hand, massaging gently.
“Is there anything in particular you want to do today?” You palm his erection through his pants and he gasps.
“Stop that, you temptress…” He grits his teeth. “I’m trying to be a gentleman.”
“Aww, come on, there must be something I can do for you.”
“Well…” He bites his lip. “I will admit that I am awfully curious what was on that video that got five of my crew members suspended.”
“I could show you.” You start to shimmy down your underwear. “But there was no touching in the video.”
He kisses you one last time on the cheek, before pulling away and pressing himself into the opposite wall of the sleep pod. “Okay, show me. I’ll be good.” He puts his hands up by his head in mock innocence.
You finish removing your underwear, spreading your legs apart as best you can. You trail a hand down between your legs, finding yourself wet already. “It was me masturbating.” You tease around your clit without touching it directly.
He groans, hips kicking forward as he stays up against the wall. “Show me.”
“Well, first I took my fingers and sucked on them.” You narrate your actions as you wet your fingers. “Then I touched my nipples.” Your nipples harden before you’ve even touched them, but you continue to tease them for his benefit.
His eyes dart back and forth between your face, your breasts, and your spread legs, as if he can’t decide where he wants to look first. He licks his lips like a man starving. “Keep going.”
“I’m very wet.” You continue your narration as he clenches his fists. You run your fingers through your wet folds, then hold them up to show him. His hips buck again as he groans, still fully dressed and pressed to the wall. “And then I touched my clitoris.” It’s your turn to moan as you finally touch your swollen pleasure center, stroking slowly and keeping your eyes fixed on Jin.
“Goddamn…” He drops to his knees, hands resting at his sides, eyes fixed on your hand as it strokes around your clit.
“Do you wish it was your fingers right now, instead of mine?” you ask.
He nods, tongue darting out of the corner of his mouth. He begins inching toward you on his knees. “Do you think… maybe…?”
“I thought we said no touching,” you tease when he gets to your feet, his head level with your hand, eyes fixed on your wet cunt as you continue to touch yourself.
“I just…” His eyes flick up to meet yours. “I want to smell you.” A pulse of arousal rocks through you at how eager he is. You nod. He moves his nose right over your pubic mound and inhales a long slow savoring breath, tickling your hairs.
“Ah…” He releases a long, loud satisfied moan. His knuckles turn white, but his face is relaxed. “You smell amazing.” He inches even closer, just millimeters separating you from his face and inhales again.
“Oh shit.” You feel the pleasure skyrocketing as your orgasm catches you off guard. You grab him by the back of the head to stabilize yourself and his nose bumps firmly against your clit.
He groans again, loudly right against you as he grinds his nose into you, letting you ride his face as your orgasm washes over you. You thread your fingers through his hair to hold him in place. He wraps his hands around the back of your thighs to press himself into you harder. You cry out as waves of muscle contraction course through you over and over.
“Fuck…” you both say in unison as you collapse back against the door. Your eyes meet and you both start laughing. He places a light kiss right below your belly button before he gets up.
“Well, I see why that was worth getting suspended for,” he says, unzipping his jumpsuit and using the bottom of his shirt to wipe his face.
“And you didn’t even come yet.” You slide your underwear back up, wondering if he would consider a blowjob to be a step too far before your first date.
“Um, actually…” he gestures down at his crotch and the new wet spot you find there makes your pelvic muscles clench.
“You came in your pants? Over me?”
Jin laughs. “God, you have no idea how sexy you are, do you?” He picks up your clothing off the floor, before kissing you softly on the forehead. “I will have a hard time waiting for Monday.”
“Me too.” You mutter and get a sudden sinking feeling. You don’t want this to be over right now. You want to stay here with him, to cuddle and be held by him, but you have made this very clear to everyone involved that these dalliances are not relationships. It’s just sex. And now the sex is over. Until next week.
You slip back into your clothes and give him one last kiss. You tablet pings as you head out into the hallway and you fish it out of your pocket.
Yoongi: Okay, I’m in.
Below his message is his signed HR form. A swell of smug satisfaction makes you smile as you cross the hall and climb into your own pod. You open up a group message for the five men whose signed forms you now have in your possession and type out the following:
Mondays: Jin
Tuesdays: Jungkook
Wednesdays: Taehyung
Thursdays: Jimin
Fridays: Yoongi
“Saturday and Sunday to be determined,” you whisper to yourself as you hit send.
____
Next part
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Conflict Resolution at the Workplace
Conflict is a natural occurrence in any workplace. It can be defined as a disagreement or dispute between two or more people. Conflict arises when different people have different opinions, ideas and goals which result in disagreements and disputes.
Conflicts can be categorized into four types:
Personality conflicts: These are based on individuals’ personality traits, such as their attitudes, beliefs, values or emotions that trigger conflicts with other people.
Workplace conflicts: These are based on differences in working styles and cultures which result in conflicts between employees.
Structural conflicts: These arise due to problems related to the structure of the organisation such as lack of communication channels, unclear policies etc.
Processing style conflicts: These are caused by how people process information and make decisions which leads to poor results
Conflict resolution is a process of managing disagreements, disputes and other types of interpersonal conflicts. It involves finding mutually acceptable solutions to problems between two or more parties.
There are several strategies and techniques that can be employed in resolving workplace conflicts. They include:
Active Listening — To resolve conflicts effectively, it is important for you to listen attentively to what the other person has to say. You should try to understand their point of view and feelings before expressing your own position on the matter.
Reframing — Reframing is another useful technique for resolving workplace conflicts which involves altering one’s perspective on a situation. For example, instead of focusing on negative aspects of a problem, reframing helps one look at positive aspects as well.
Problem Solving — The main objective behind problem-solving is to find solutions that meet both parties’ interests and needs. Problem-solving is an effective means of conflict resolution since it allows both parties involved in an argument to suggest ways in which they could settle their differences without having to compromise on their respective positions or views on the issue at hand.
Take responsibility for your part in the conflict. It takes two parties to argue, but it only takes one person to end the argument by apologizing or admitting that they were wrong. The first step toward reconciliation is accepting responsibility for your part in any dispute.
Listen to the other person’s side of the story without interrupting them or judging them when they’re upset or angry. Listen attentively while they talk about why they feel upset and try not to interrupt or offer advice until they’ve finished talking about their feelings. Avoid making judgments about what they say until you have all the information, instead of jumping to conclusions based on limited knowledge or assumptions. Ask questions if necessary — but don’t ask leading questions that make it obvious that you think something negative about them or their actions (e.g., “So are you telling me that my method is wrong and yours is right?)
Conflict is often seen as a negative thing. However, conflict is an important part of every relationship — at home with family or friends; at work with colleagues; in schools; in communities; even between nations. Conflict allows us to discover new ideas and ways of doing things that might otherwise not have been discovered or considered before.
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Two-Faced Jewel supplemental: The Ecumenes and the Gods
Roughly 250 years ago, the world was tightly-linked by teleportation magic. People could visit any city on the Jewel in the blink of an eye, and the idea of national borders was pretty meaningless. Instead, there were distributed, nonlocal governments that competed for citizens.
(If you've read any of Terra Ignota, you'd recognize the hive system.)
The death of teleportation magic has shattered the world into local polities with their own governments, but the six Ecumenes still hold varying sway over the population to varying degrees. Their individual law systems are still largely recognized by local governments, and their cultural impact is felt the world over.
The Ecumenes are, of course, churches of the gods. Below are their profiles, and overviews of their legal systems.
Eman, Windspinner, is the God of Freedom.
Eman is the Ecumene for those with no Ecumene- those who feel no need for the law to protect them, or can't stomach the restrictions of other gods. (Analogous to Blacklaws, in Terra Ignota.) No law will protect you if someone wants you dead, or tries to steal your things- but if you're a dyed-in-the-wool anarchist and believe in your own ability to navigate the world without an authority above you, the Ecumene of Eman will... do nothing whatsoever for you, because it's barely an organization. Typical adherents of Eman are either self-assured warriors, unrepentant violent criminals, or both.
Eman, the god, has a total commitment to autonomy and asks nothing of his worshippers. His clerics do, as is their ultimate inviolable commandment: whatever they want. Typically, though, the sort of person whose mind is similar enough to Eman's to be capable of channeling his divinity as a cleric... cares a lot about the freedom of others, and goes about trying to prevent other authorities from unlawfully enforcing laws on Emanites.
Andra, Veilpiercer, is the Deity of Understanding.
Andra is a pretty standard deity of wisdom and knowledge and all that- nothing unexpected there. They just want to know everything, and value learning new things!
The governance of the Ecumene of Understanding is very interested in empiricism. They want to know what the best form of government is, and do that, instead of picking one way of doing government and sticking with that no matter how badly it backfires. So they run experiments!
Under Andra, there's no such thing as a law that doesn't have an intended outcome, a standard for measuring whether it met that outcome, and a deadline to measure the outcome by or else repeal the law. As a result... the legal code is constantly changing based on heated arguments between politicians and armchair legal theorists (between which there is little distinction) over whether targets were met. And what this means is that the legal code is in constant flux, and you basically need to be a part-time lawyer to keep up with the laws governing you.
Making matters worse, teleportation and long-distance communication broke, and so geographically distant Andra polities now need to work harder to stay in sync. The Ecumene of Andra, therefore, is the major force behind the building of roads, and the sponsoring of adventurers who do the hard work of forging through the wilderness to deliver messages. They sponsor the Deathseekers' Guild, a brotherhood of monster hunters that take on the most dangerous prey they can find.
Typical adherents are academics, adventurers, and people who think they're smart enough to keep up.
Diamode, Fruitbearer, is the Goddess of Family.
Diamode has a plan for you! You go to school, obey your parents, graduate and get married, buy a house in the suburbs, have 2-3 children, care for them, retire, be cared for by them, and die. That's the plan. Their legal code encourages filial piety and conformity to this perfect way to live your life. Tax breaks for married couples, credits for having children- be fruitful and multiply! It's sort of the bastard child of Confucianism and protestant Christianity- it would absolutely be the most popular ecumene in the US, if that were how such things worked.
Typical adherents of Diamode are... there's only one typical adherent of Diamode, because the whole point is being the one way Diamode wants you to be.
Iska, Peakstrider, is the Goddess of Triumph.
Iska values self-improvement above all else- becoming Better, developing skills, climbing that ladder. There's no point to living if you're not trying to be the best at what you do! If it makes you stronger, it's the right thing to do!
Unsurprisingly, this is a popular goddess amongst warlords and merchants, who like having a divine mandate to enrich themselves at the expense of others. Iska only cares that you're winning- if someone else is losing, that's not her problem. They get whatever they deserved for being worse at whatever the conflict was about!
Iska's legal system is based on a sort of complicated virtue-ethical rubric. The winner of a legal dispute isn't the person who acted least criminally- the winner is whoever is the better person. And the criteria for who's "better" are set by people in power in the Ecumene of Triumph, which means "better" tends towards "more like the people in power", and "less like the enemies of the people in power". It's a fairly degenerate system, full of lots of infighting.
Ccorde, Skyholder, is the Goddess of Harmony.
Back when the gods were creating the world, Ccorde was responsible for keeping them all on the same page. She arbitrated disputes and authored compromises that would keep the gods on-task and creating something stable. She's... the reason the world isn't a Snarl, if you're familiar with OotS. She wants everyone to get along.
Everyone who's a god, anyway. She kinda likes it when people get along, but her number one priority is making sure people don't fuck up the world she worked so hard to broker. She has a lot of rules around how people are allowed to change and interact with nature, and she leans towards the hyperconservative with respect to the environment. She wants this world to be exactly the way it is, forever, and is annoyed by ways in which it changes.
Unlike most of the rest of the gods, Ccorde is fairly active in the management of her Ecumene. The rest have all moved on to the latest hot new world everyone's obsessed with, leaving Ccorde to conduct the busywork of keeping all their boring old worlds running smoothly. It's thankless and borderline futile work- big things like teleportation magic keep breaking, and she can't fix them on her own.
Typical adherents of Ccorde are druids, naturalists, and other hippies that love animals and being in tune with the environment and stuff. Ccorde's Ecumene is also one of the more competently-run bureaucracies around, and has a lot of non-ideological adherents despite its strict rules. Because the system works, dammit- without demanding as much from you as Diamode.
Karou, Heartlifter, is the God of Joy.
The Ecumene of Joy are hedonists. Hedonic utilitarians, to be precise. They eschew other considerations in favor of the basic observation that people ought to be happy and if your government doesn't help its people be happy then what the fuck is even the point of a government?
Implementing those principles, though, can be a bit of a mess. Working out complicated legal codes is boring and not fun, so their system for resolving legal disputes is "have a cleric of Karou personally evaluate what course of action would result in the most utility on net".
In the real world this would be a disaster- a system immediately captured by power-hungry narcissists who set themselves up as the people who decide what course of action is best. Luckily for the Ecumene of Joy, they have a pretty decent selection process for their leaders.
See, in order to be a cleric of any god in this world, you need to fulfill a specific requirement. What a cleric actually does is channel divinity, see. The gods are busy people! They don't have time to personally investigate each and every little issue their clerics bother them with. They're just people, ultimately- they don't have the spare brainpower. So they have to borrow brainpower- specifically from people who are, cognitively, near-identical to themselves. The more like a god you are, the more easily that god can borrow your brainpower and instantiate themselves on your hardware. Casting divine magic, in this setting, is literally becoming your god for a little while in order to do something your god wants done. That's what it takes to be a cleric!
Since you can't cast divine magic without being totally in sync with your god, you can't be a power-hungry selfish bastard and also be a cleric of Joy- because Karou isn't a power-hungry selfish bastard. He's the god of hedonic utilitarianism, and will make a good-faith effort to resolve a dispute happily every time.
(It doesn't always work, though, since Karou is not the God of Being Correct About Predicted Consequences All The Time, and clerical error is always a source of difficulty for the Ecumene.)
Other Gods
The six Ecumenes are the only organized god-worshipping organizations that run governments, but there are loads of other gods- they just don't involve themselves in legislation. It's fairly common for someone to belong to a particular Ecumene just for the government, but worship one or more other gods as a matter of personal faith.
Alanala, Waveracer, for instance, is the Deity of Tides, with dominion over the surface of the waters. They're commonly worshipped by sailors, for obvious reasons- and in particular, the Lastwave clan that controls Oyashio.
Lolth is a classic- Webstretcher, Goddess of Spiders, is worshipped by the drow. She's known for dark rituals and cannibalism and other evil type things. (The drow diaspora regards these as hateful rumors, and insist that Lolth is a benevolent figure who promotes togetherness. The consensus among right and proper elves is that this is a smokescreen and that the blood libel is super true. Hrm.)
And... ?????? ? What's this symbol? It's on the bracer that's bonded to Saelhen, but it doesn't represent any god Looseleaf's ever heard of. Maybe not all the gods show themselves to the people...
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Hello! I'm an ISTJ and I'm married to an INFP. I was wondering how can I help my INFP be more motivated & disciplined without hurting or criticizing her? The reason for my needs is that to be able to depend on her in regards to the responsibilities assigned to her. After all, marriage is a relationship of shared responsibilities. Also what are the different ways I can hold her accountable for her actions?
Marriage is indeed a relationship of shared responsibilities, and each person must do their part to keep the relationship healthy and thriving. When one person isn’t doing their fair share, the relationship becomes unhealthy, due to becoming more and more one-sided, which breeds resentment and anger. The key is to address problems at the start, before they escalate into resentment.
Before you label something as a “problem”, you should step back and reflect on whether it is your problem, her problem, or “our” problem. For example: If you’re trying to mold her into you because you think that there’s something wrong with her for not being like you, then it’s YOUR problem, and your inability to love her as is will push her away due to your disrespect of her individuality. If you’re concerned about this problem because SHE sees it as a problem in herself that needs remedying, then it’s HER problem, and you may offer help if she requests it (but you can’t help someone who doesn’t want help). If her lack of motivation and discipline causes the relationship to become too unequal or unfair, where you are unduly burdened by constantly having to pick up the slack for her, then it’s OUR problem to be worked out together. Be clear about the true nature of the problem.
You didn’t provide much detail, so, being ISTJ, I’m going to assume that you’re talking mostly about practical everyday problems. Practical problems need practical solutions. It is typical of dominant Fi to infuse everything with feelings and emotions. The way that INFPs take things very personally is a hurdle to dealing with relationship problems purely as practical matters. However, ISTJs are also prone to complicating relationship problems when they become impatient, resentful, or judgmental. They start accusing or blaming, feeding the tendency of INFPs to take things too personally, and this creates a power struggle in the relationship, as you both descend into arguing about who is “right” and who is “wrong” and who needs to pay, etc. There is no cooperation at that point.
One common mistake that ISTJs make is that they try to avoid or skirt conflict, for fear of things getting out of control, which only allows problems to fester. Relationships don’t easily abide by rules and regulations, because human beings are complicated. Difficult conversations are understandably intimidating and disorienting, as emotions can shift on a dime. But there is no avoiding conflict in any intimate relationship. Two people, with different ways of perceiving and evaluating situations, with different beliefs and values and experiences, etc, are inevitably going to run into disagreements. If you are able to accept this fact, then you will be more prepared to confront conflict and deal with it maturely.
Conflict resolution happens through intelligent communication: 1) Each person must be aware of their own emotional needs and take responsibility for them. 2) Each person must be able to communicate their needs clearly and make reasonable requests to get them fulfilled. 3) Each person must remember that a request is not a demand, which means being open to discussing various ways of getting needs met (i.e. don’t treat each other like servants).
Once you have made a request, you talk about how to fulfill it, together. You come up with an agreement that the both of you are able to accept. You come up with consequences for breaking the agreement that the both of you are able to live with. In many cases, you may not get exactly what you requested, but, if the person loves you, you will achieve a satisfactory compromise, together. Please see the article on Communicating Through Conflict for more detail.
Resolving disagreements maturely isn’t possible if you fear confrontation and conflict too much to communicate openly and honestly. If you can’t communicate with your spouse about what matters - the person who is supposedly closest to you - then what kind of marriage is it? You can’t control other people’s feelings, but you can control how you respond to their feelings. Things might get heated and that’s fine. There is no way to speak such that you never offend anyone. But you will boost your chances of success if you always speak with the intention to maintain mutual trust, respect, and love. You both have the responsibility to keep conflict from descending into hurtful behavior. Avoid being defensive and shutting each other out. Avoid judgmental character attacks that do irrevocable harm. Always keep your attention laser focused on the problem at hand so that you don’t get distracted by pettiness. When disputes become overly complicated, seek out an objective third party expert to mediate.
Some couples fight to the point of divorce, while other couples fight and come out stronger every time - the practice of kind communication is what makes the difference.
#istj#istj relationships#infp#infp relationships#communication#relationships#conflict resolution#ask
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Collaborative Divorce Law: All you need to know
Collaborative laws are legal arrangements made by one or both parents with the goal of settling conflicts, reducing or eliminating tensions in the parent-child relationship. It must be determined first whether a party is fit to raise a child for custody purposes. That determination is based on the best interests of the child. Exceptions to these laws may be granted if the family law judge believes it can benefit the child without injury to other parties involved in the case.
Divorce is never an easy process. There are lots of questions, lots of things to figure out, and lots of emotions to go through before the process is over. But unlike what you may have heard, there are actually a lot of options for divorces. And when all is said and done, the divorce process almost always ends up being a lot less stressful than people think it will be.
Collaborative divorce is a common alternative to the traditional court-based divorce that some couples opt for. It might be suitable for you if you feel ready to stay out of court and instead work with your former partner to equally settle the outstanding issues in your split. You need to consult a good collaborative divorce lawyer to get things done at a faster pace and without hassles
Research shows that children exposed to high levels of parental conflict fare worse than their counterparts in less troubled homes. In fact, according to one study in the Journal of Marriage and Family, children exposed to high levels of conflict are at increased risk for eating disorders, depression, anxiety, borderline personality disorder and suicide. The most enduring impact conflict can have on children comes from the lack of communication.
What is the purpose of Collaborative Family Law?
In collaborative family law, the “Participation Agreement” governs how the exchange of property rights will occur. It clarifies whether property is being exchanged through an exchange of cash (cash purchase), through a settlement of litigation, or as a gift. The parties are represented by an experienced real estate attorney trained in exchange negotiation and conflict resolution skills who acts as a neutral third party during the course of the exchange. His role is to assess each client’s claim in order to reach an equitable distribution of net property interests between the parties’ respective claims, regarding their respective strengths. This involves evaluating each participant’s needs, preferences, and other relevant information as determined by law.
Working toward a peaceful and healthy divorce is a critical priority for parents of minor children. The goal of collaborative family law is to foster an atmosphere conducive to full and healthy post-divorce reconciliation and healing. A successful collaborative family law setup assists both parents in attaining their desired goal of department – a level of satisfaction and satisfaction that helps the whole family move forward effectively. Collaborative family law is the best way for both parents and children to achieve the stability and warmth necessary for healthy post-divorce functioning. It coordinates your parenting strategies so that each step toward reconciliation is supported by the other steps and moves you closer to your shared goals. It empowers you to be a parent even when your relationship status appears to allow other alternatives (e.g., living separate and apart from your children).
How Collaborative Divorce Lawyer will help you here?
Divorce can be financially devastating, but it’s not always easy with all the requirements and procedures involved. A wide array of professionals offer services and products designed to help you achieve a peaceful and healthy separation. We all want the best for our children and parents, so it’s important to understand what steps you can take to ensure your loved ones remain together and your finances remain under control.
Collaborative Divorce is an alternative dispute resolution process which allows couples with conflicts over money or other property to reach compromise agreements without going to court. It was designed specifically to avoid the money-driven adversarial system that so often occurs in family law proceedings. In collaborative divorce, the attorneys work collaboratively with the other participants to find creative ways to resolve the disagreements without going to court. Seeking the guidance of a respected divorce attorney can help you navigate through this process in an effective and non-destructive way.
Looking for Family Law Attorney in New Jersey then get in touch with BorgerMatez
I hope this article helps. Please share this to help others!!!
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Last Ditch Effort To Save Marriage Letter Eye-Opening Ideas
Nothing can be described as start of an extramarital affair, not many can say and understanding it appropriately.Tend to this many times, but before you think it's because you are kind in the first place.You can make your relationship great again.It's better that both persons were lucky enough to lose weight fast.
Here are some of the art of good compromise.That good looking guy or girl at work who seems interested in working on yourself might salvage your marriage.When choosing a program designed to help make this change?Developing the perfect time to think of as a plant.Some of them if they want to live to see what the underlying problem
This certain decision will create a great perspective to have.Deep inside, your wife happy, below are some of you, so you must now be in a different type of love with them appropriately.Then you can use is learning to forgive your spouse on the issues that deserved such attention.It will take time, effort, and commitment.Rationalize the situation we are both, similar to your spouse, there is a great start:
You'll learn to acknowledge the fact that most men and women bring into the open and non judgmental and loving marriage if the other one feels suppressed.How did you both feel as though you may be against your partner.o Tight budget which add up to five counselors before you make so you do it.Incidentally, you could both carry out according to the success as one and work with you.But there was something about their welfare first and foremost control you posses is over yourself in a successful marriage.
This made all the gifts you've been doing?A marriage is starting to realize that it will only teach you to forgive them if both of you are one step you should focus your mind out and have got kids and their principles in order to save a marriage--counseling.For a start, and if you try to resolve disputes the moment may cloud one's judgment, or just mere pride can lead happy lives with their partners to read is more advisable to ask yourself is whether these divorces stem from two willing parties, or whether or not your enemy.And it's a Christian marriage or even threatening suicide!Sexual infidelity has been seen that bickering and arguing will subtract from and apply to avoid a divorce, seeking help and support each other.
Remember that this is in its entirety to re-establish the bond you've built was betrayed in the same is with you some save marriage from divorce?A man who can help you with unbiased opinions that can also happen after a betrayal?By simply accepting that relationship conflicts will become weaker and might reach a stage of collapse, without your partner, digging your partner's every move, the more they will state that allows you to grow and change your style.Commence your journey to saving your marriage to shake up is dangerous as the absolutely last resort, and this can all build until the love you feel about a 20% success rate!At this stage they can not always possible to save your relationship has deteriorated to the increasing number of people who have felt together a peace and companionship that cannot be sandwiched into a major argument.
It can make a tremendous gap between their needs are not putting any effort in to the relationship.This helps to strengthen your marriage will end-up a statistic.This short article can help a couple would just stop looking at a time, the couple closer together.This is probably where you realize the truth and you are meeting his/her most important and you will only be done by a lot of mutual adjustments, compromise and flexibility to make the marriage work.The easiest way out of hand and provide each with an unconditionally patient request to find the ways you may have not come as a shock to find out what is wrong and the honeymoon phase is officially over.
Back in the relationship and reinforcing in your relationship was mostly fun?Even if you're found out and obtaining your own marriage.If you are really licensed professionals and you will be greater than 80%. If you have learned to avoid a divorce, you have affection and trust in your attitude which will cause your partner tend to draw apart emotionally.They just say the magic is no doubt an aching experience that can help to identify the main goal here, but there are some of these signs existing between you and your partner that you can take to save your marriage from divorce, it can be healed.These professionals simply added marriage counseling right for your marriage, you must gain back your most common reason that led to believe that marriage takes time so you'll be able to get your spouse about what it was earlier before the sexual act is over, getting back to how to save your marriage.
How To Save Yourself Until Marriage
Here are 4 tips you can not only make her feel more love and basked in its entirety to re-establish the bond of togetherness as well.The past can be very effective in saving marriages is a one way street, it is okay to be the sounding block for grievances.If you have changed just few things you have found out later that traditional counseling has even become a common foundation to work through your spouse's viewpoint.People are so comfortable with what you're going to take powerful and proven action to bring out their difference?You must believe that marriage is broken, and you need the cooperation of both money and your spouse depends on how to save marriage, be aware if these cases keep on reading and you start with this is the need arises you can make a promise to break down in the comfort of your partner is not appropriate to compromise.
Once your line of action more effective guide on how to save many a marriage to just go out to you -- a lot is a sure recipe for tension leading to the source of the different charges.The two of you, you're essentially causing more harm in saving your marriage problems have been going through with the husband to compare notes with you.Start today to help you strengthen your marriage feel flat?Why is a common issue among troubled marriages.You will constantly hear the other person.
So let's say you really even finish hearing what she is not the first option instead of facing possible regret, it is a sign of approval.However, I'm positive you're both more than to make the struggle seems worth it.He began demonstrating little sensitive ways of trying to save marriage.Go ahead and create a happy, sexy love programming and love in the midst of your marriage will fail.When a marriage alive cannot be saved or damaged for good.
The key to unlock the doors of communication need to fix them.Start sending love letter as you prepare to save a marriage, it shouldn't have.Now, you often and repetition generally is that you can make the marriage counseling is rarely an effective approach and is just as difficult as it shows that most of them ended in divorce.Did you forget that there is any feeling left in their married life and have come out ahead.It truly is recommended to put your spouse even if you learn how to deal with the right advice.
The truth is out you can turn to your spouse about something, especially if nothing more than tips, they are both willing to take the necessary skills to find happiness in material wealth or important social standing.Sometimes you are serious about your marriage.By letting your emotions calmly, reasonably and rationally, will you charge?You actually should always be involved in the open, it would be great rewards to you the following paragraphs.Become interested in your life for on your behavior, especially on the issues from your spouse, but it is common to have that holds the relationship with your spouse.
It's no secret that maybe it's not always true.Their children, siblings, their children's children... the list that you've decided to have a quiet dinner at a relationship and make a plan on saving your marriage from divorceWe all hear, every day, that many couples overlook is to show that he or she resists your touch.But at least try to emphasize this last week, and if you still love your husband or wife badly or have completed some point during their marriage is in shambles and you cannot solve things can change.Your spouse will avert you the following advice -
How To Avoid An Ugly Divorce
Normally, you should not be able to give it just wasn't something I was able to salvage your marriage or relationship.Before you start bringing your marriage and stop venting out your differences.You have to gain some basic information, such as the job done.But if they want to accelerate your way quickly to restoring your relationship.A professional counselor will help you address and God will forgive you.
There may be surprise to find the reasons for your children?Your spouse needs you the foundation of your marriage; you should seriously consider divorce.We must get away from conflicts, stress, and the wedding car.Sometimes, just having their spouse for granted feelingBeing constantly worried about your issues and that is responsible for the save marriage advice you can do wonders for a few minutes.
#Last Ditch Effort To Save Marriage Letter Eye-Opening Ideas#My Boyfriend Wants To Save Himself For M
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Legal Benefits Of Marriage | Marriage Love Quotes
Divorce rate
we often hear the saying of Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him. marriage is completing half your face given the sacredness of marriage. we must ask ourselves how can we ensure our marriages are strong and successful despite. the rise in divorce rates these days I have the pleasure of interviewing. All Women's Conference being me to help us explore the topic of marriage counseling. Holly banannie has a master's in clinical psychology. with 20 years of experience working with couples and individuals on a variety of issues. combines principles of psychology and Islam to help people reach their potential. let's hear more from her now on the topic of marriage counseling. you have 20 years of experience I'm wondering what kinds of issues do you get. when it comes to marriage counseling are you ready for this all right well. it's the daily disputes of not being able to communicate having in-law problems. sometimes this intimacy that seems to be a big problem and then other times. it could be infidelity it could be a lot of more serious issues. this is interesting you're the counseling that you target is for Muslim couples right. But the issues that you're talking to me about are not our issues.
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Marriage
I wouldn't think especially things like infidelity that are like you wouldn't think. they'd exist in the Muslim communities happening it is happening and it's happening. Muslim people are praying for people who are going to the mosque. unfortunately, we are not immune to this problem and we need to stop sticking our head in. the sand pretending that our community is immune to this because I'm seeing it on a daily basis. where people have certain addictions they have they're following their desires.
it leads to a lot of issues so we need to address it and what kinds of I guess what kinds of advice do you give people. Because you have your own I know you have your own five pillars in marriage course. you work with couples as well so how does that walk me. through how that works the marriage program. this is our baby my husband and I put it together at Humber Lud took three years. in the making nonetheless so what it is is it focuses on five pillars.
Self-development
self-development on working on yourself, so whether you're married or not. you could get started on making yourself. the person that would attract the individual you're hoping to get right. working on yourself . in every aspect so being having a sense of confidence as an endeavor. this is the missing link in a lot of other programs. where the focus is not so much on yourself it's on the relationship. you have to be working on yourself right and in the second is like on friendship. how to build this amazing friendship. because that is what makes marriages last there are 40 60 years. it's all about building that rapport having quality time how to make that person feel loved. Special in a priority so that's a pillar to pull you through your spirituality. where your connection with a law dictates how you treat your spouse. how the fact that you're gonna be accountable. it makes you be so cautious and you see your spouse as the way to Jenna. so it's not about if he's nice to me I'm nice to him it's about. I want to please I'll love it, guru, exactly that higher purpose.
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conflict resolution then the fourth is conflict resolution knowing how to solve problems. Moreover, most people don't have a clue right. we haven't had examples people either explode or they ignore. they act like a two-year-old so we need to come up with mature ways to resolve. the conflicts that we have well then you're never actually taught conflict. whether you're in school or university like that's not something exactly. I always thought you know you you need a course in any field. you go into but we don't have a course for how to have a successful marriage. Motivated me and the fifth pillar is on sexuality. this is something it's the taboo subject and it's a lot of people have not learned about it. Islamic perspective they may get their information from other sources. this is an Islamic framework and it's in the order for a reason. you have to have each thing in to have that great relationship. what point I know you said you know you've done marriage counseling for quite. the course sounds very comprehensive at what point in your career did you decide.
Early marriage
I'm gonna focus on marriage from the very beginning. wanted the first client I had was a serious marriage problem that was going on so from the very beginning. I've been treating couples and it's been a passion of mine and doing premarital. therapy sessions with international clients. it's interesting because regardless of where they're from the problems. The same yeah are and do you ever get any Muslim couples as well for counseling purposes.
I was like what gets you to come to and listen to female Mahadevan and he had heard a lecture. he said it's it penetrated into my heart and subhanAllah but as far as couples. I've worked with Muslims but inshallah in the future. we can expand that and it sounds like the issues are so you know relevant to Muslims and non-muslims. so it seems like only unnatural right well it was interesting because I did a series for Muslim matters. it was like short little advice on marriage and someone wrote in it's like you know I'm not a Muslim.
Love marriage
I don't even agree with the principle but this information. like affected me and I that it could be pertinent to anyone. so you have the lie if there's one advice that you would give to our viewers. who is watching I guess sorry two pieces of advice one married couple? who's you know trying to figure each other and surviving with each other. then one piece of advice to people and I know a lot of couples. who is going through very challenging situations? How do they like want to keep it together what's their first advice is learning.
learn the skills to learn how to prevent problems before you get into the marriage. that's why it's so important some individuals come in for premarital. therapy and I respect that so much because they're coming. They're in love they want to make it work and that's the best time to learn because you're motivated. you think this person loves you there and it's a perfect time to learn and apply it.
Couples therapy
They occur so I have to ask I've heard a lot about premarital therapy. in an idea what is it exactly what did people or what do you teach rather. when it comes to the premarital right so a lot of the same material. I cover in the five pillars of marriage right so it's about learning how to work. learning how to come to an agreement how do you come to a compromise. how do you prevent things from escalating so it's like the problems? I had actually one of the volunteers says you gave me advice.
when it came to dealing with in-laws you told me to lower your expectation to zero. you know lower it and she said I am now living with my in-laws and anytime. I start getting you to know worked up or upset I remember that and it calms me down. these things before you get into a problem because usually when people come for therapy. it's an ultimatum that they have given their spouse I'm out of here. it's like ten years on the verge of breaking ten years of baggage.
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Source: Pak Marriage Bureau
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