Tumgik
#i don’t want to kill myself bc i think they’d be better off without me i want to kill myself because i want to know how they would react
fleshdyke · 1 year
Text
shsjeiegjshebr
#man. getting upset about stupid shit. again#yesterday we had an assembly at school for the end of the year awards and whatever#and the only friend i had in the class i was in when we went down left early to go find the rest of our friends#so i went down and found a spot and i already sort of knew this would happen#but i got there pretty early and i watched my whole friend group come in. and they didn’t even look for me#it’s like they didn’t even notice i wasn’t there. and they just walked over and sat down on the other side of the room#and i guess they were all having fun sitting next to each other. i was sitting alone having to listen to some seniors saying really awful#things behind me. idk#they didn’t text me and ask where i was or say anything about it afterwards#like they just completely didn’t notice i wasn’t there#and if they did they don’t care enough to ask where i was#and i’m making them seem a lot worse than they are but like. MAN that hurt#like all i want is a friend. that’s it man. that’s all i’ve ever wanted. i just want someone i can rely on to sit with me at an assembly#i’m not suicidal i really do want to live but. god i just want to know what would happen#i don’t want to kill myself bc i think they’d be better off without me i want to kill myself because i want to know how they would react#i want them to know how much stupid shit like that affects me man. yk. and i know how callous that is and i hate it but god i think about it#so so so much. like#they’ve gotten a whole new friend group and tell me that we’re still really good friends but man you can’t fucking lie to me like that#like you can’t tell me that we’re as close as we used to be because we’re not. i know they don’t like me anymore and it’s fine becuase i get#it i wouldn’t like me either i have to spend all day every day with myself#but like. all i’ve ever wanted is a friend#and i want to just break and start yelling at them for this because i feel so fucking alone but it’s not their fault and that would only#drive them away more#like i feel like the only thing that would bring them closer to me would be to try and kill myself but i don’t want to do that yk#not actually at least. i’ll daydream about it 24/7 though. i’ll think of that as the better timeline#and i don’t want to bring this up to them bc i already have once before and they pretty much told me its not their problem#and again i’m making them seem so much worse than they actually are but this is just how my brain interprets this#and i kind of want to attempt but not die but like my mom’s best friend died this morning and i can’t fucking do that to her#like more than anytjing else i just want a friend. i don’t blame them but like. is that so much to ask#vent
4 notes · View notes
pxedpiper · 3 years
Text
Horizon (21)
Plot Summary: Once a princess of a kingdom you loathed to call yours, you have somehow found yourself aboard a pirate ship, stuck on the ocean waves. Now you try to figure out how to escape them, but as you continue to journey with them, you find yourself wondering if you even want to.
Pairings: Ateez x Reader (Kim Hongjoong x Reader)
Content Warnings: Mentions of death and sexual implications throughout the fic, nothing ever specified in detail
Previous / Masterlist / Next
A/N: Y'all ever just spend all night writing 23 pages of a chapter because you got possessed by the god of writing suddenly???? yeah that was me with this chapter bc HOOOOLYYY SHIT she's a long one! Not that I'm sure anyone will complain with that but like damn i really did go off here. Chapter warnings though: this does contain child abuse (though I don't think it's incredibly descriptive??? i tried my best) as well as uh smth near the end that i think y'all will like (eye emojis bc i'm on laptop) I hope you guys enjoy this EXTREMELY long chapter !!! i'm about to go pass out lmao
It wasn’t hard to corner Seonghwa; thanks to him spending a lot of time in the kitchen, it was easy to catch him during a time no one else was likely to interrupt. You casually strolled in, trying not to make it seem obvious that you were there for a reason.
“Hello, Seonghwa,” You greeted, “Are you busy?”
“Not terribly, just preparing dinner for later,” He replied, not looking at you, “I would like some help, however, if you’re willing.”
“No problem,” You jumped up, “What do you need?”
“Make sure these vegetables are cut up properly,” He instructed, handing you a kitchen knife, “It’s no dagger, but I don’t think I need to doubt your skills with a blade, now do I?”
You confirmed, “Jongho’s mother showed me what to do when we first went to his home, remember? I can handle this.” You began to chop the vegetables, letting a moment pass before you spoke up again. “Seonghwa?”
“Yes?” He answered absentmindedly, clearly focused on cooking.
“I couldn’t help but notice… Every time that Hongjoong brings up the possibility of seeing your families, you act differently. You and Yunho both, truly.” He froze in place at your words. “And I remember before, you told me it’d been six years since you’d last seen your family. I didn’t want to ask more at the time, because I was still new to the crew and didn’t want to pry, but I hope by now I’ve earned enough trust to be able to ask, Seonghwa.”
“It’s not a matter of trust,” He sighed, leaning forward onto the counter, “I don’t like to talk about it. It isn’t important, anyway.”
“Of course it’s important, it’s about you,” You replied, looking at him, “And I’d say it’s only fair, considering you know everything about my family. If you really don’t want me to know, then I’ll stop asking, but I think it might benefit the both of us if you still get upset over it.”
He was silent for a moment, thinking over your words, before sighing again, “I know by now you know the common theme amongst everyone in the crew, correct?”
“Yeah, that Hongjoong saved you all in some way,” You instantly responded, “It applies to me, too.”
“Well, I was the very first person he saved,” He began, “I was his first crewmate. He met me right as he’d stolen The Utopia from it’s former owner.”
“That recently?!” You were shocked, “That means you’ve known him since before he was the Pirate King!”
“Yes, Yunho and Mingi, as well,” Seonghwa nodded, “But I won’t go too deeply into that. You see, before I was a pirate, I was just a sailor, I’d go out sailing for food to help feed my family, my parents and little brother. But one day, a storm came with no warning, and we weren’t prepared. I was the only survivor of that crew.”
“Oh my god,” You almost whispered, “How did you survive?”
“To this day, I’m not sure,” Seonghwa admitted, “It was almost like I was meant to survive, like I wasn’t supposed to die there. Maybe one of Maddox’s tricks, now that I think about it, but who could tell for sure? The point is, I was alive, but still adrift in the middle of the ocean. I thought that if the storm didn’t kill me, surely the hunger or dehydration would. But that’s when Hongjoong came, barely managing the ship all on his own. He noticed me sailing on my own and brought me aboard, giving me something to eat and drink while he was at it.”
“That sounds like Hongjoong,” You smiled fondly, thinking of your captain.
Seonghwa matched your smile, “Yes, and I was so thankful. I felt as though I owed my life to him, and after finding out that he was in need of crewmates, I quickly volunteered to join. He was surprised, but not exactly in a position to turn it down. And thus, I became his quartermaster.”
You tilted your head slightly, “But, what about your family? What happened to them?”
“What, indeed,” He sighed, “I know you’re no stranger to how pirates are considered by the general public. I couldn’t go back as a pirate, what if they’d shame me or want no part of me anymore? Who could blame them if they did? I thought it better to just let them think I was dead, then they wouldn’t feel the shame of having a pirate as a son. But, even now…”
“You feel guilty over it,” You finished, catching on to what he was about to say, “Seonghwa, I really don’t think you need to worry. While, yes, maybe at the time they might’ve had a bad reaction, by now I’m sure they’d just be glad to know you’re alive, pirate or not. Maybe it’s time you finally saw them again, let them know you’re still here and thinking about them.”
“I can’t,” He shook his head, “At least, not now. I’m not ready to face them yet. Besides, with the war looming over our heads, there’s no guarantee I’d even survive, and how cruel would it be to show up in front of them only to die, this time genuinely? It’d be too much, for both me and them.”
“I understand,” You nodded gently, holding onto both of his hands, “I won’t tell you that we’ll definitely make it out of this, because I don’t know for sure, and we could all die in this war. But, I want you to promise me that if you make it out of the war alive, you’ll go find your family. They need the closure, and quite frankly, you need it, too. Can you do that for me, Seonghwa?”
“I… I’ll try,” Seonghwa hesitantly stated, “But I can’t promise anything. Let’s focus on winning this war first, shall we? Then we’ll see about me finding my family.”
“That’s good enough for me,” You grinned at him, “Now, do you still need help with dinner, or can you handle it by yourself?”
“I can take it from here, (Y/N),” He chuckled, almost as if he were amused. As you turned to leave the kitchen, you could hear him call after you, “(Y/N?)”
“Yes?” You turned to face him again.
He gave you a sincere smile, “Thank you. For listening.”
“It’s no problem,” You returned the smile with one of your own, “After all, what are friends for?”
~
Later, as you searched the ship for Yunho, you ran into someone near the bow of the ship. Looking up, you quickly saw that it was Eden.
“I’m so sorry, Captain Eden,” You quickly apologized, “I was looking for Yunho and wasn’t aware of my surroundings.”
“It’s fine,” The older man waved off, an almost disinterested look upon his face, “I was actually meaning to speak with you myself, Your Highness, without Hongjoong keeping watch over you. I had something to ask you.”
“Please, don’t call me by any titles, as I already said I have none,” You reminded, “But alright, what do you need?”
“How come you haven’t left the crew yet?” With that question, the mood changed so suddenly that you could hear a pin drop.
Unsure of what his meaning behind this question was, you hesitantly replied while trying to maintain a friendly air, “I’m sorry, I’m afraid I don’t-!”
“I mean to say, how come you haven’t left the crew and freed them of this war yet?” Eden cut you off, doubling down on his question, “You know there’s no possible way for a ragtag group of pirates to win against the Royal Navy, why not just give yourself up and spare their lives?”
Dropping the friendly air, you narrowed your eyes and frowned at him, “And where exactly do you come off speaking like that when, quite frankly, it’s none of your business?”
“You asked for my help and my charge is your captain, so, quite frankly, it is my business,” He replied, matching the hostile air, “I agreed to help for his sake, not yours. You’ve given me no reason to believe you’re not a detriment to this crew.”
“Maddox said-!” You started, but were once again cut off.
Eden scoffed, “Maddox? You mean the madman down at Tortuga who you all now claim to be the ocean? Do you really expect me to believe that?”
“You said to Hongjoong earlier that you believed him because he knew better than to lie to you,” You argued, becoming increasingly more annoyed with Eden’s attitude the more he spoke.
“I did, yes, and I did believe him. I believe that he believes it, not that it actually happened. How you convinced him of such magic, I’m not sure, but I don’t care,” He responded, “I want you to leave Hongjoong and this crew, forever. They’re all too caught up in their love for you to realize that you’re leading them to their deaths, but if you truly care for them as much as you say you do, then you’ll go back home to your castle and call off this war.”
“How fucking dare you talk to me like that?” You stepped forward, enraged as you leaned in close to his face, “I may not have titles any longer, but I won’t be talked to in such a matter. Who exactly do you think you are to be giving me such an order?”
“Your captain’s captain, if you’ve already forgotten,” He returned your glare with one of his own.
You let out a slight scoff, “Yes, you’re his former captain, but you’re not mine. You have absolutely no authority over me, and so I don’t have to listen to a single fucking thing you have to say. I don’t care if you don’t believe me, I’ll prove it to you one way or another. Just you watch.”
“I’m telling you one last time, leave the crew and go back home, unless you want to see the crewmates you love so much die in front of your eyes,” He warned once again as you turned around, not backing down in the slightest.
Whipping around, you leaned in close once again, whispering harshly, “I’m not going anywhere, do you hear me? I made a promise to Hongjoong that I would stay on this ship, that I would never leave, and my promise to him means more to me than any authority you have over him!” Having finally had enough, you pushed past him, still fuming at how much he’d riled you up. Now you definitely needed to find Yunho, he always knew just how to calm you down.
~
Eden gave a small smirk as he watched the girl storm away, practically seeing the steam run out of her ears at how angry he’d gotten her.
Making his way over to Hongjoong’s quarters, he took a seat across the younger captain, “Well, she’s definitely a feisty one, that’s for certain.”
Hongjoong groaned, putting his quill down so he could put his head in his hands, “Don’t tell me you gave her one of your ‘tests’...”
“I had to make sure she was ready to fight alongside you all,” Eden replied, his tone almost innocent, “This is her family we’re going against after all, we can’t afford for her to pull any punches.”
“Yes, well, now I’m afraid she may end up punching you before anyone else, the way you do things,” Hongjoong sighed, leaning back in his chair, “So, what then? Did she meet your standards?”
“I think had we gotten anyone else we’d be in trouble,” Eden answered, not looking at his former student, “Despite her royal upbringing, she’s a perfect fit amongst you all. I guess you could call that irony, you being the Pirate King, and all.”
“Yeah, she was always a perfect fit, even if things started out rocky at first,” Hongjoong smiled softly, thinking of the girl that had taken his heart.
Eden didn’t miss the look on his face, speaking up, “I know you, Hongjoong, I know that look. And even if I didn’t, I could see it the minute I saw you with her. You’ve fallen for her, haven’t you?”
“Deeply,” Hongjoong admitted, not wanting to even try to argue it, “Like you wouldn’t believe. I’ve had… infatuations before-!”
“You’re telling me,” Eden scoffed, remembering some of the antics Hongjoong had gotten up to as a young teenager.
“But,” Hongjoong continued, giving a glare to his teacher, “It was never anything as… intense, as this. It’s almost indescribable, just every inch of my being wants to be near her. It was hell when she let herself get captured, Eden, pure hell. I barely know how to contain myself.”
“If you feel this strongly about her, you should tell her,” Eden advised, “It won’t do any good to just sit around on your feelings, letting them build up until they put you at a disadvantage. It’d be best to tell her the next time you see her.”
“We’re about to go to war, Eden,” Hongjoong sighed, “One or both of us very well could die, and then where would that leave us? What would be the point of confessing if we may not even live to see a future together?”
“Alright then, let’s think about it, shall we?” Eden humored his student, “Let’s go through the different scenarios. Number One, you live and she dies.” Just the mere thought of it caused Hongjoong to tighten his fists; he absolutely could not let that happen. “Now, would you want her to have died never knowing of your feelings, and have yourself live on knowing she never knew? Or would you at least want her to know before she passed, know that there was someone on Earth that loved her deeply?”
Hongjoong was silent, not knowing how to respond.
“Number Two,” Eden continued, “You die and she lives. Would you want her to live with the regret that you died for her, but never knowing why outside of you being her captain? Would you want her to live with that guilt?”
“No,” Hongjoong spoke softly, staring at the desk in front of him.
“Number Three, you both live. Then you can both live on happily as whatever you want, whether it be a pirate and his crewmate or as two civilians settling down in a town somewhere. It seems that there’s a pretty clear answer to me,” Eden concluded.
“You left one out,” Hongjoong pointed out, “We could both die. Then what?”
“What does it matter then, Hongjoong? You’re just trying to give yourself reasons not to tell her about how you feel,” Eden argued, “Besides, if you tell her now, at least you can say you had some time together, even if it was short. Some time is better than none at all, you’ll do well to remember that. You need to tell her, Hongjoong, before it’s too late.”
Hongjoong was silent for a moment before he sighed, “I’ll think about it. Besides, I don’t even know if she feels the same way.”
“She definitely feels the same way, she was damn near ready to kill me when I told her to leave you and the ship,” Eden scoffed.
“Right, well-!” Hongjoong continued the work he was doing, then paused, “Wait, you did what?”
~
You were still steaming with anger as you tried to find Yunho, almost missing the blue haired boy as he ran into you as well.
“Hey, watch it there,” He chuckled, clearly not upset until he saw that you were, “What’s wrong? Did Wooyoung call you princess again?”
“No, it’s not that, it’s that I can’t believe that Hongjoong was raised by such a rude, no-good, infuriating bilgerat of a man,” You ranted, anger still clouding your head.
“Okay, let’s calm down a bit before he hears you, I doubt that’ll make the situation better,” Yunho grabbed onto your shoulders and tried to calm you down, “Let’s go to the railing and talk, alright? Like how we used to back when you first came on board.”
“Alright,” You nodded, taking deep breaths to calm down, “Let’s go.” Once you were at the railing where you liked to watch over the ocean, you informed Yunho of your altercation with Eden, relaying every detail.
“Ah, it seems you’ve been given one of Eden’s ‘tests’,” Yunho chuckled, understanding the situation now, “Don’t take it to heart, he likely meant none of it. It’s just what he does to every new crew member, to make sure Hongjoong isn’t surrounded by anyone who’ll hurt him. It’s like you said, the man’s like his father, and he wants what’s best for him, even if neither of them will admit it. He can take it a bit far though, damn near almost got killed by San for doing the same thing.”
“I think I’ve had quite enough of people giving me tests,” You grumbled, thinking of when Maddox had sent the storm to test your willpower on your first voyage to Elysia.
“Yeah, I don’t blame you!” Yunho laughed, “But like I said, he meant none of it. If anything, he probably respects you more now due to your response. You put Hongjoong before him, which is what every crew member should do for their captain. For once, your temper actually worked in your favor.”
“Oh, shut up,” You stuck your tongue out at him playfully before you both burst into laughter at your antics. It was silent between you two, before you spoke up again, “You know, this is a lot like before, you and me at this railing while you tried to calm me down. I didn’t trust anyone back then, but now I trust you all with my life, isn’t it funny how things turn out?”
“Yeah, I remember,” Yunho smiled, gazing out into the ocean, “Nearly thought you’d and Yeosang would end up killing each other, the way you two fought. Now here you both are, ready to fight side by side. I’m almost proud.”
“I have something to admit,” You started, “Nothing bad, but when we last saw Maddox, he gave me a mission of sorts. He told me to get close to every crew member, to find out everything I could about them, to strengthen our bonds, I assume. If I’m being honest, I’d almost forgotten about it because it seemed to happen naturally, but there’s one more person I still don’t know a lot about, and that’s you, Yunho. And, I figured, you were the first person on this ship that I began to trust, so how fitting is it that you’re the last person that trusts in me?”
“If I’m being honest, I kinda figured that’s what you were doing,” Yunho admitted, “And, well, I suppose it was going to happen sooner or later that I’d tell you my past. I don’t mind telling you, but I’m afraid it’s quite bittersweet. Not tragic, like Mingi’s, San’s, Yeosang’s, and Wooyoung’s, or complicated as Seonghwa’s. Just… bittersweet.”
“I’m listening,” You encouraged, holding onto his hand.
“I used to live in a small town, way far away from here, clearly, with my father and younger brother,” Yunho began, “My mother died when my brother was very young and I’m sorry to say he went not too long after. I was fairly young myself, so it didn’t really impact me as much as it would now, but it changed something within my father. He became increasingly overprotective, to the point where I was essentially being kept captive in my own home. I wasn’t allowed to go out, and anytime I tried I’d get yelled at. I’m sure you can relate to that feeling.” He looked at you, the smile on his face not matching his words. You merely nodded, allowing him to continue.
“However, try as he might, he couldn’t stop me from looking out my window at night and seeing the stars, all sparkling and beautiful. Sometimes, if I was lucky, I’d sneak outside my home through the window and climb up onto the roof to be able to get a better look. I guess if you wanted to be poetic about it, you could say the stars were my first love,” Yunho had a fond look on his face as he told the story, “And so, from the minute I learned to read, I spent all my time learning about the stars and anything that comes with it. That’s how I learned to be a navigator; my love for the stars was the very thing that gave me my role on this ship. And that’s where Hongjoong comes in.”
“Hongjoong and Seonghwa had just made it to shore when I saw them; my former home was by the ocean,” Yunho continued, “They’d just met themselves, I believe, as I remember them telling me that Seonghwa had just become Hongjoong’s first crewmember. They’d stayed in town for a few days before they spotted me, looking at them through the window. I still don’t know what possessed Hongjoong to try to talk to me, but he walked right up to the window and introduced himself, Seonghwa trailing behind him, trying to stop him. I was surprised they’d even bothered, but I was overjoyed, as well. They were the first people beside my father who’d actually talked to me. I told them about myself, and why I was stuck inside, and you wouldn’t believe how angry Hongjoong got, him and Seonghwa both. They both promised that they’d find a way to bust me out, and that I could go with them as a pirate as their third member. Well, it didn’t take much to convince me, that’s for sure. I agreed instantly, and they set their plan for that night.”
“Once it was dark, Seonghwa caused a distraction, luring my father outside and away from the house, while Hongjoong snuck in and helped me carry whatever I needed out to the ship. Once we made it out, Hongjoong gave some sort of signal to Seonghwa to let him know that we were in the clear, and Seonghwa snuck away from my father. By the time he made it back home, I was already on the ship. I never knew what he did when he realized I was gone, or even what became of him. I joined the crew as their navigator and never looked back since,” Yunho concluded, “I don’t really feel bad about it, because I know I’m a lot better off than I would’ve been back there, but at the same time, I feel for the poor man, you know? His wife and child die, and his only remaining son runs off, never to be seen again. If I didn’t remember how bad it was, I might’ve been inclined to return, but as it stands, I don’t really ever want to see him again. I’m happy now, I don’t really need any sort of closure, not any he could give me anyway.”
You nodded for a second, understanding, “We’re a lot more alike than I thought, our stories are so similar. Now I understand what you meant when you said that you know how I felt back when we first talked.”
“It takes one to know one,” He agreed, still looking off into the ocean, “Though, I will say, it is nice to finally let it off my chest again. The crew knows, of course, but… I suppose it takes someone who knows exactly what it’s like to be locked away from the world to fully understand the weight of it. I’m glad you were the one I could properly talk about it with.”
“It’s no problem,” You smiled at him, giving him a slight nudge, “Consider it returning the favor for listening to me talk back then. Now we’re even.”
“Now we’re even,” He nodded, smiling himself, “Now, let’s go join the rest of the crew, shall we? I suppose by now Hongjoong will have found out what Eden said and demand he give you an apology, so let’s see how the rest of the crews make fun of him this time.”
~
The rest of the trip to Eysia was calm, unlike the first time when Maddox had created that storm to test you. This time, there were no tests, only calm waters as you reached the island.
“The water is calmer than usual,” You pointed out, “Almost as if it’s expecting us.”
“You think Maddox knows we’re coming to see him?” Wooyoung asked, looking out into the water.
Yeosang replied, “It’d be a shock if he doesn’t, he seems to know everything, doesn’t he?”
“Well, he is the ocean,” You shrugged, “He probably hears us talking right now. I guess we’ll know for sure in a bit. We’re reaching land.”
“I still can’t believe there was such an opening amongst those rocks,” Eden frowned, but not in contempt, but rather confusion, “How’d you manage to spot it the first time?”
“That would be thanks to (Y/N),” Hongjoong came up, a proud smile on his face, “She’s got an amazing eye, she’s the best lookout we could’ve asked for.” Flustered at the praise, you looked down and smiled, not meeting Hongjoong’s eyes. “Now, are we ready? We’re heading to shore now. Who’s coming? I know (Y/N) is joining.”
“Captain, do you even need to ask? Of course the whole crew is coming,” San sighed exaggeratedly, as if he was tired of Hongjoong not knowing what to expect from them.
“Yeah, I just hope that we actually get to go in the cool looking cave this time and not be forced to wait while (Y/N) goes in alone again,” Wooyoung added, pouting at the memory of the last time the crew was at Elysia.
“I’ll be going as well, as Captain of my own crew,” Eden told Hongjoong, turning to look at him, “I’ll need to meet him for myself if we’re truly to get help from him.”
“Understood,” Hongjoong nodded, “Let’s go, then.” Once you made it off the ship onto dry land, you were met with a familiar face.
“Welcome back,” Elysian greeted, a genuine smile on his face, “It’s nice to see you again. And welcome to you, Eden. It’s nice to meet you for the first time.”
“Right, you as well,” He answered somewhat awkwardly, “I’m guessing you’re the Elysian they’ve told me about, then.”
“That’s correct. Like what Maddox is to the ocean, I am to this island, thanks to (Y/N),” He shot you a grateful smile, “Now, I understand you all find yourselves in a tricky situation. Maddox is expecting you all.”
“Yes!” You could hear Wooyoung softly cheer to himself.
“Lead the way,” Hongjoong said, ignoring Wooyoung’s little outburst. It didn’t take long until you were back in the cove from before, where you last met with Maddox, this time surrounded by the crew you’ve come to love.
Said man smiled at you, having been waiting, “Hello, again, (Y/N). It’s been quite some time.”
“But not for you, has it?” You guessed, “You’ve been seeing everything we’ve gone through since we left, haven’t you?”
“That’s correct,” He nodded, the smile on his face not fading.
“Damn lot of good you were, we could’ve used your help during some of the things we went through,” Mingi scoffed.
“We could use your help now,” Hongjoong added on, looking at him with a determined look.
“I could not and cannot be involved,” Maddox answered, “If I were to, I’d be disrupting things too much and fate would be changed. Things must follow a certain path, and I must remain impartial as the deity of the ocean. In some small cases, I can alter things to fit fate’s path, but anything of this magnitude I must stay out of.”
“So, you’re essentially saying you’re useless,” Eden spoke dryly, arms crossed as he looked annoyed.
“Not necessarily,” Maddox contested, “(Y/N), Hongjoong, could you two please step forward?” Looking at each other, the two of you did what he said. “(Y/N), I promised you that the next time we met, I’d tell you everything about how the two of you met before and how neither remember. It’s time I keep that promise.”
“We already have a suspicion,” Hongjoong spoke, “A dream I had, we think it’s a memory of our first meeting.”
“You’d be right,” Maddox nodded, “But it’s not the full story. The truth is, I was the one who wiped both of your memories.”
“You what?” The both of you spoke at once, shocked at the information he’d just given you.
“The two of you met before you were ever supposed to,” Maddox began to elaborate, “Sometimes, things like that happen naturally, which is why it’s my job to fix them so fate doesn’t end up changing. I had to wipe your memories of each other to make sure that when you met again, you’d be complete strangers.”
“Well, can you give us those memories back?” You asked, “Or, at least tell us what happened?”
“I can,” He confirmed, “It won’t hurt fate for you to know now that you’ve met and grown close as intended. If you both wish it, I can return your memories back right now.”
You looked to Hongjoong, who nodded, “Do it. I need, no, we need to know.”
“Very well, then.” Maddox spoke, “Then, I’ll need you both to close your eyes, and think back to when you were children…”
~
“(Y/N), are you sure we should’ve snuck away from the guards?” Your brother asked you worriedly, “I mean, they were given to us for a reason!”
“Oh, relax!” You laughed, practically skipping in the town square, “We’re the prince and princess, we should know about how our kingdom works, and what better way to learn than to see it firsthand? Come on, this helps you more than me, you’re the one who’s going to be king after all!”
“Hey,” He stopped you, grabbing onto your shoulder so you could face him, “I know Mother and Father remind you of that all the time, but you don’t need to remind me. Once I’m king, I’ll make sure you have some sort of power, not be some bride they think they can marry off.”
Smiling, you took his hand, “Well, that’s very sweet of you, but we’re here to have fun, not talk about what kind of king you’ll be. Now, come on, let’s go see what’s out there!” You led your brother away, running down the streets as you both laughed and giggled. You were twelve years old, and your brother fourteen, and it felt like the world was before you as you both took in the sights and sounds of the town. It wasn’t as grand as you were expecting, but it was something different than the castle walls, and that alone was enough to get you excited. However, it wasn’t long before that excitement came crashing down.
There was a crowd gathering in the street, and you could hear someone’s cries in the middle of it, it sounded like a young boy’s. Making your way through the crowd, you pushed your way up front where you could finally see what was happening; a young boy around your age with light red hair was getting whipped and kicked around by people much older and heavier than him, and everyone only seemed to be watching. He was covered in blood and mud, and you could see scars littering his body which told you that this wasn’t the first time this had occurred.
You whispered to your brother, who had caught up to you, “What’s going on? What are those men doing to him?”
“Those are slave traders,” He whispered back, “I didn’t know there were any in this kingdom, they sell people off and treat them terribly. Looks like that one got him mad about something, he’s giving him a real beating…” In horror, all you could do was watch as one of the older men kicked the boy again, causing him to spit out blood upon impact.
“How come everyone’s just watching, why don’t they do anything?” You hissed, growing increasingly angry at all the people just standing idly by.
“Look at him, what do you expect them to do? They can’t just take him in a fight, and I’m sure he’s probably got some dirt on all of them to keep them quiet. All they can do is watch.” At this, another blow was dealt, and you’d finally had enough.
“Well, I can’t watch this! Come on!” Without thinking, you quickly rushed towards the boy and grabbed his hand, ignoring your brother’s instant cry of your name. “Come on, get up!” You rushed, taking advantage of the fact the slave traders seemed so shocked, he’d frozen in place. Quickly as he can, the boy rose to his feet, and at an instant you were off, holding onto the boy’s hand as you took off running, your brother quickly following.
“Quickly, follow me!” You urged, knowing you were likely to be chased, “We can’t let them catch us!”
“(Y/N), you’re going to get us in trouble!” You brother hissed out, managing to keep up with your pace, “What are you thinking?!”
“Run now, talk later!” You answered, continuing to run.
Your brother admonished, “Do you know what you’ve just caused?!”
“How was I supposed to just leave him there, he’s all bloody!” You argued, gesturing to the boy, who’d remained quiet, confused on what was happening, “They would’ve beaten him until he died! He’s not that much younger than you, you know!”
“I-!” Realizing you were right, your brother sighed, “Alright, fine! But when Mother and Father find out, it’ll be on your head!”
“That’s fine with me, now let’s go!” Quickly, the three of you found a small alley to hide in for the time being. It was then you turned to smile at the boy, “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure you make it somewhere safe, alright? Just trust me. What’s your name?”
You could see that he was still slightly hesitant, but he spoke in a soft voice, “...My name is Hongjoong. Kim Hongjoong.”
“I’m (Y/N), and this worrywart is my brother (B/N)!” You introduced yourself and your brother, continuing to try to make the boy more comfortable with the two of you.
“You mean… the prince and princess of the kingdom?!” The boy’s, Hongjoong’s, eyes widened as he realized who he was in the company of.
“That’s right! Which means you’re the safest with us!” You grinned, “Hey, how old are you, anyway? You look pretty young to me…”
“I’m… twelve years old… I think…” He trailed off, not knowing for sure what his actual age was since he never knew his parents.
Your grin widened, “Hey, that means you’re the same age as me! That’s amazing!”
“(Y/N), we need to know what to do with him before the slave traders come and find us,” Your brother reminded you, “We need to think, fast.”
“Well, can’t he just stay with us in the castle?” You frowned, not wanting to part with your new friend, “That way he won’t go back to being a slave!”
“Look at him, do you really think Mother and Father would agree to letting him stay in the castle?” You pouted, but as much as you hated to admit it, your brother had a point. With how grimy and bloody Hongjoong was, there was no way your parents wouldn’t turn him away at an instant. Just as you were about to speak up again, you could hear the slave traders beginning to catch up.
“Quick, no time to talk, let’s go!” You grabbed onto Hongjoong’s hand again and ran, your brother following close behind. You made it to the docks, where you could see a ship loading it’s cargo and saw an opportunity. “Hongjoong, go on that boat! Hide in a barrel or something, but make sure you get on that ship, alright? It’s your best chance to escape!”
“But, what about you two?” Hongjoong asked, uncertain about the situation, “What will you do?”
“Don’t worry about us, we have guards looking for us,” You assured, “We’ll be fine, just have to deal with a bigger punishment from our mother than usual, is all. You’re what matters here, Hongjoong, if you don’t go now, you might not have another chance! Now go!”
He made his way to sneak onto the ship, but turned back to face you again, “Will we meet again?”
You smiled, glad to know he wanted to see you again, “I’m sure that someday, we will. Now, go on then! Be free!” He nodded quickly, giving you a smile in thanks, before he rushed out into the cargo hold and hid from view. Just then, you heard the slave traders catch up behind you, clearly out of breath.
“There they are!” One called out, “Where’s the merchandise?”
“You’re too late!” You provoked, “He’s long gone from here. Now you can’t ever hurt him ever again!”
“Why you rotten little…” The man tried to march towards you, but stopped at your brother’s words.
“Ah, ah, you wouldn’t want to hurt the prince and princess of the kingdom, would you? Especially not with the guards right behind you?” Turning around, the slave traders did indeed find the guards that were looking for you both behind them, looking none too pleased at the situation they were looking at.
The wind blew as you grinned. It seemed like karma really did exist after all. But oddly enough, it seemed like you were already forgetting what you were so happy about…
~
Your mother slapped you across the face, the impact making you land heavily on the tiled ground. You didn’t look up, refusing to meet your eyes as you touched your stinging cheek, your brother standing right behind you.
“Do you have any idea what you’ve done?! Not only did you sneak away from your guards, you caused a scene in the middle of the square, right in front of everyone, and even dragged your poor brother into it with you! Do you know how much shame this brings both us and him?! You stupid, stupid child!” Your mother continued to yell, hurling insults as you stayed on the floor.
“I just…” You spoke softly, trying to remember what you had done in the first place.
“Just what? What explanation could you possibly have?!”
“I-I don’t remember.” You looked away again, knowing you just made things worse.
Your mother scoffed, “You don’t remember? How could you not remember what just happened today? Horrible child, and it’s a question of why (B/N) will be the one in charge?”
“Well, then tell me!” You raised your voice unexpectedly, “Tell me what it was that was so terrible, that it makes me a horrible child!”
“I- Well-!” It was clear that your mother either wasn’t expecting that response, but it only infuriated her more, “Idiotic girl, you should know what it was! I shouldn’t have to tell you of your own wrongdoings!” It was clear that she didn’t know either, but you didn’t notice at the time.
“Why not, it’s never stopped you before!” You fought back, clearly having had enough of this treatment.
“Enough!” Your father spoke up, having watched the whole ordeal, “(Y/N), you’re not to step foot outside of these castle walls, do you understand me? Clearly you’ve proven that you can’t be trusted to go out, not even with your brother.”
“What?! But what about (B/N)?! He joined me, too!”
“(B/N) is going to be king someday, he needs to be out in the town for the people to know and trust him.”
“But that’s not fair!” You argued, close to tears at this point. “You always treat him better than me! We’re both just as guilty of the same thing!”
“That’s enough, (Y/N)! My word is final!” Your father shouted, “Now, go to your room while your mother and I think of a proper punishment for (B/N).” Tears welling up in your eyes, you quickly ran back to your room, slamming the doors behind you and not letting anyone else inside as you cried.
~
Meanwhile, with Hongjoong, he now stood in front of Eden, who had found him stowing away in the cargo hold, and was now staring down in front of him with a cold look.
“Now, let me get this straight,” The older man spoke slowly, “You are a former slave, who managed to find the courage to escape his tormentors, and stowed away on this ship to find freedom? Did you just plan on us never finding out?”
“I… admit I wasn’t thinking much at the time…” Hongjoong answered softly, keeping his head down. In truth, he couldn’t quite remember what had happened or what he’d been thinking, but that was the best explanation that he could come up with.
“No, clearly not,” Eden drawled, “And what were you planning to do once we reached land? You really did not think anything through, did you?”
Hongjoong stayed silent, knowing he was right.
Eden stared at the boy, thinking, before he sighed, “As much as my entire being hates to admit this, I must say you do have courage if your story is true. And I can’t in good conscience let you out on your own when you don’t have a clue on how the world works, especially not with you being so young. So, I propose this: you become one of my pirate’s crew, and you’ll have food, drink, and safety for as long as you stay. If you choose to leave later, that’s fine, but for now, I’d say it’s in your best interest to agree. So?”
Hongjoong didn’t even need to think twice about it, looking Eden directly in the eyes, “I’ll do it. I’ll become a pirate.”
“Very well,” Eden nodded, “I’ll teach you everything you need to know myself, but it won’t be easy, got it? If you’re going to stay on this ship, you’re going to pull your weight, understand me?”
“Yes, sir!” Hongjoong instantly replied.
“Good, then from now on, I am your captain, and you will refer to me as such,” Eden declared, “Welcome to the crew, Kim Hongjoong.”
~
Opening your eyes, you were shocked as you saw Maddox in front of you again. Looking around to regain your bearings, you could see the rest of the crew and Eden, watching you both with rapt attention. You turned to Hongjoong to see him in much the same state you were, shocked and dazed.
“That was…” You trailed off, not sure where to start.
“The two of you were always destined to meet, but that would’ve been too soon,” Maddox explained, “Had I not intervened, things could’ve turned out for the worst. But, I knew that one day the two of you would meet again, so I took your memories so I could return them now, in this moment.”
“I…” Hongjoong still seemed a bit dazed, but he quickly shook it off, “We can’t focus on that right now. Maddox, we’re about to go to war, and we need some help. Are you sure there isn’t any way for you to help us?”
“I cannot,” Maddox confirmed, “But there is someone who can.” He turned his head to Elysian, who seemed confused.
“Me?” He questioned, “Why me?”
“I created Elysian, which means he has abilities similar to my own, albeit weaker, and can travel away from the island. Furthermore, due to him being my creation, he has no obligation to keep fate in line, nor does he know what will happen unless I tell him, so he’s the perfect person to bring along with you. I can’t say that you’ll win, but I can say that he’ll be a big help,” Maddox explained.
You walked up to Elysian, “Will you help? We need every person we can get right now.”
He smiled gently at you, “It’s because of you I was given a name and given a purpose. Of course I’ll help you in your time of need. It’s not even a question.”
“Thank you,” You sighed with relief, “And thank you, Maddox, for showing us the truth. Even if I’m not fond of the fact you stole our memories in the first place, I at least understand why.”
“Thank you for that, at least,” He responded, “I wish you all the best of luck. May we meet again soon.”
~
It was late at night as you were on the deck, practicing your sword training. You figured that with a war on the horizon, it was best to make sure you brushed up on all your skills, even the weaker ones. You were sure you were alone, until you heard a familiar voice come from behind you.
“How is it that you’re never asleep when you’re supposed to be?” Hongjoong smiled at you, watching you practice.
You stopped and laughed, answering, “I could say the same thing to you, captain. What do you need?”
He was silent for a minute before he spoke up, “Care to talk a walk around the ship with me? I find there’s a lot on my mind… A lot I need to get out.”
“Of course, no problem,” You replied, sheathing your sword, “Let’s go.” The two of you walked slowly, silence filling the air aside from the waves hitting the hull of the ship.
Finally, Hongjoong spoke up, “That… was a lot we learned today, wasn’t it?”
“It was,” You agreed, “But it was as we expected. I helped you escape onto Eden’s ship.”
“(Y/N), you saved my life,” Hongjoong spoke blatantly, but with clear emotion, “I surely would’ve been killed had you not interfered. I know Maddox says we were never meant to have met there, but now that I know, I can’t imagine things having turned out another way. I owe my life to you.”
“You don’t owe me anything, Hongjoong,” You shook your head, “You saved my life back at that auction, as far as I’m concerned, we’re even. You don’t need to give me anything, least of all your life.”
“What if I want to give you something else?” Hongjoong asked, “Not my life, but something close to it?”
“Like what?” You asked, confused as to where he was headed.
“Like my heart.” At those words, you stopped in place and looked at him, seemingly paralyzed at what he just told you.
It felt like time froze still for a moment before you could finally find your voice and say, “What?”
“(Y/N), I don’t think I need to tell you that you’ve become very important to me in the time that you’ve been on this ship,” Hongjoong began, “Of course, all my crew members are important to me, but with you, it’s beyond that. For a long while now, you’ve been the most important person in my life, and now with my memories returned to me… It’s clear. You were always the most important person in my life, you who saved my life, it has always been you. From the moment we first met eyes at the auction, to when we finally faced Elias Sweet and dealt with him for good, to even just recently with Reeves, you were the person I was fighting for the most. I fell in love with you, so deeply, and I can’t afford to hide it any longer.”
“I- But why now?” You asked, trying to regain your bearings, “We’re about to go to war, why would you tell me this now?!”
“Because, if there’s anything those memories taught me, it’s that we are meant to be together,” Hongjoong affirmed, taking your hands in his, “There’s no logical reason to believe that we would’ve met ever again after I got on that ship, but here we are now. There were so many times where things could’ve gone wrong, but they didn’t. Maybe it was Maddox’s doing, maybe it was fate, I don’t care, because I know now that we can make it through this. We’ll survive this war, because the two of us are together, and once we’re together, we can do anything. I believe in us, do you?” By now, you were crying due to the overwhelming emotions.
“Of course I do!” You cried out, holding onto Hongjoong’s hands tightly, “Hongjoong, I love you so much! I just- I just!” You didn’t know what else to say, and good thing too, because Hongjoong took that moment to grab your face with one hand and kiss you deeply, the other hand trailing behind your back to pull you closer. You kissed him back with the same intensity, your arms wrapping around his neck as you pressed your bodies together. The two of you broke apart for air only to kiss again, and again as they only grew more passionate.
Eventually, Hongjoong rested his forehead on yours, whispering, “Stay with me tonight, in my quarters. Please.” You could tell what he meant by that request in his eyes, and you felt your body grow hotter at the thought.
Even so, you still nodded and agreed, whispering back, “I will.” Not wasting a single second, he picked you up in his arms and carried you to his quarters, kicking the door closed behind him.
What happened the rest of that night was between you and him.
217 notes · View notes
hearts-hunger · 3 years
Text
half-cocked || javier peña x reader
Tumblr media
Read on AO3 | Masterlist
Summary: Javi’s your boss, and he’s so damn stubborn. You’d have to be crazy to go off half-cocked twice in one night, right?
Pairings: Javier Peña x DEA Agent!Reader
Genre: smut, porn without plot (18+ only!)
Word Count: 2.8k
Warnings: god uhhh filth, oral (m and f receiving), thigh riding, choking, praise kink, dirty talk, hand jobs, unprotected sex, dom javi, sub reader, fluff at the end bc i think smut always deserves some fluff ♡ also, totally unbeta-ed.
A/N: full disclosure i was drunk on vodka cran and listening to “drew barrymore” by bryce vine when i wrote this, so it might be terrible or it might be really good. i just want javi to lovingly & tenderly top the fuck out of me :) let me know what you think!
Tumblr media
“I told you not to go near those guys.”
Javi crossed his arms over his chest, waiting for you to answer, to explain why you’d done the exact opposite of what he’d told you to do. You felt yourself blush, face heating with anger and embarrassment and something you refused to acknowledge.
“I thought I could get something out of them,” you said, going on the defensive. “They know something, Javi. It would have been stupid to pass up an opportunity to get some intel from them.”
You watched the way his jaw worked.
“No, what would have been stupid is if you had gotten hurt,” he said, his voice tight with frustration. You almost wished he would yell at you and get it over with; this cold anger was harder for you to bear.
He’d expressly told you to stay away from the group of narcos you’d been tagging for a week, and he was your boss. But you knew you could get something from them - they’d talk to you quicker than they would talk to Javi, and you both knew it. You never disobeyed a direct order, especially not from Javi, but he was being so stubborn. You went ahead and questioned them anyways, and Javi had caught you red-handed.
“You don’t think I can take care of myself?” you asked coldly.
He ran a hand over his face. “Of course you can take care of yourself,” he said. “But you’ve been here for two minutes, alright? Sometimes you have to trust my judgement. I’m not a complete idiot. If you fuck around with these guys and go off half-cocked, you’re gonna get yourself killed.”
You opened your mouth to protest, to say you’d done the job without getting hurt. You knew that was beside the point; you’d gotten lucky with these guys - you could have just as easily gotten shot for your trouble, and both you and Javi knew that.
He cut you off before you could say anything. 
“You answer to me,” he said. “Are we clear? I don’t care what kind of wild ideas you have in your head about catching fuckin’ Escobar all by yourself. If I say to steer clear of a bunch of narcos, you do what I say. Not whatever bullshit you come up with. Got it?”
God, you could have screamed.
“Yes,” you managed. You started to leave, but that wasn’t enough for him. He took your arm in a grip gentle enough not to hurt but firm enough to show you how deadly serious he was.
“Yes what?” he asked.
You felt your face heat again. “Yes sir.”
You could have sworn you felt a fucking switch flip. The air in the office was suddenly hot and constrictive; you met his eyes and felt like you were on fire.
He was so close to you, so close you could feel his warmth and smell his cologne. You could see where his pulse beat furiously under his jaw; his eyes were dark as they met yours.
He gave a hum of agreement. “That’s better.”
You couldn't think of anything to say; you were completely consumed with him, the way his hair fell across his brow, the way the top two buttons of his shirt were undone, the way his skin looked so sunkissed and warm.
For the second time that night, you went off half-cocked; you pressed your mouth to his and hoped against hope it wouldn’t cost you your job.
His response was immediate - he opened his mouth against yours and took your tongue, one hand still holding your arm and the other moving to hold your waist securely against him. You carded your free hand through his hair, whining a little; god, but he could kiss. Your breath came in sharp gasps as he hooked your leg over his thigh,  drawing your heat closer against him.
“You want this?” he asked, breathless.
“Yes,” you said. “Yes, sir. Please.”
He sighed against your mouth. “Fuck. Alright.” He ran his fingers over the seam in your jeans. “What do you want?”
You could barely think straight; something you’d imagined countless times came to mind, and you decided to try your luck.
“Can I ride your thigh?” you asked, needy. “Please, sir.”
He groaned. “Yeah, pretty girl. Whatever you want.”
He stumbled backwards, one hand out to make sure you didn’t crash into anything; he found his desk chair and took a seat, looking up at you like you were the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.
“Come on, baby girl,” he said, patting his thigh. “Right here.”
You did as he said, straddling his thigh, feeling a rush of heat before you’d even moved. You put your hands on his shoulders and let him kiss you, deep and hungry.
You started to move against his thigh; his hands roamed all over you, desperate, needy. You rocked your hips, pressing yourself against his thick, muscled thigh. Your breath started to catch in your chest; he put his hands on your hips and pressed you down against him, each movement of your hips dragging over his thigh. 
“Javi,” you breathed. You gripped his shoulders and pressed yourself against him. 
“Tell me how it feels, sweetheart,” he said, kissing your neck.
“God - oh, fuck, feels so good,” you managed. “Oh, Javi - ”
“Such a good girl for me,” he said. “Getting yourself off on my thigh - what a good girl.”
“‘M close,” you whined. You were almost embarrassed with how quickly you’d come to the edge.
“That’s alright, baby,” he said. His big hands moved over your breasts. “Come on, honey. Take what you want from me.”
Your eyes fluttered open long enough to see his face, all flushed pink; he bit his lip when you moaned, his head leaning back like he was getting off on your whines.
“Oh, Javi, I’m gonna cum,” you said, desperate and a little panicked. Though you’d gotten yourself off thinking about him before, you’d never gotten off with him, much less while riding his thigh. Maybe this was crazy. Maybe this wasn’t - 
“Good girl,” he said, almost like a sigh. “Fucking gorgeous, getting yourself off on my thigh.” 
Your nerves faded and you wrapped your arms around his neck, moving your hips sharply against his thigh; when he kissed you, it was surprisingly tender. He kept his mouth against yours as you reached your high.
“Javi,” you said desperately. “Fuck, fuck - oh, god - ”
He held you against him as you rode out your orgasm on his thigh, moans tumbling from both of you. He sucked right below your jaw, murmuring words of praise.
“Thank you, thank you,” you babbled, leaning against him as you came down from your high. You could feel how hard he was through his impossibly tight jeans; you palmed him and kissed at his neck, sloppy and sweet.
He couldn’t help a choked laugh. “You’re welcome, baby,” he said. “Anytime. But really, you did most of the work.”
He lifted you off his lap, ignoring your slight protest; he stood you up and fumbled with the button on your jeans.
“Let me taste you, baby,” he said. He knelt in front of you, looking up at you from under his long, dark lashes; you would never have guessed he could look this needy. You couldn’t do much but nod your head.
As he started to pull your jeans down, you had a sudden moment of clarity. “Javi, wait, wait.”
He stilled, looking up at you for direction. “What’s wrong?”
You fumbled with the words. “I didn’t - you haven’t - ” You swallowed. “Let me get you off.”
He chuckled, a wry grin spreading over his face. “Patience, baby girl. You’ll get your turn.”
God, your mouth practically watered at the thought. He quickly put any other thought out of your mind as he helped you shimmy out of your jeans, his ease and control only making you more flushed. He made quick work of your underwear, pausing only a moment to comment on how wet they were.
“Hmm, someone enjoyed themselves, I see,” he teased.
You blushed. “Shut up.”
He grinned up at you. “Make me.”
He didn’t wait for a response before he nosed at your heat, gently bringing your leg over his shoulder. You grabbed the corner of his desk, your whole body like a live wire with desire and overstimulation. You’d only just come down from your last orgasm, you couldn't possibly - 
“Jesus Christ,” you gasped, tangling the fingers of your free hand in his curls as he went straight to business, eating you out like you were his last meal. The sounds he was making - god, they were downright sinful. You didn’t think you’d ever enjoyed a man going down on you with such pleasure or such skill.
“You taste so good, querida,” he rasped, catching his breath. “Fucking delicious, baby girl.”
You tugged a little on his hair, incoherent whines falling from your lips as he sucked on your clit. “Javi, fuck, oh, god, please - ”
“Gonna cum, beautiful?” he asked. “Gonna cum on my tongue?”
A sound came from your throat that almost sounded like a sob. “Yes, please, just - ”
You didn’t know what you were asking for, but evidently he did; within seconds, his tongue dipping into you and his nose nudging at your clit, you came so hard it made your legs shake.
“Javi, Javi, Javi,” you pleaded, like a prayer. He sucked your clit through your orgasm; when you finally came down, he grinned up at you and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
“You’re so beautiful,” he said with feeling. “You sound so gorgeous when you cum, baby.”
You steadied yourself on his shoulder as he stood, shaking with residual waves of pleasure. He kissed you, salty with your own taste, pulling your hips against his.
“I wanna suck you off,” you said, almost begging. “Please, Javi.”
He groaned against your mouth. “If you want to, honey.”
You put your hands on his shoulders and pushed him down until he sat back in his desk chair, knees spread for you. You knelt in front of him like he had just done for you; your hands were shaking a little too much to easily undo his belt, and he did it for you. You pulled his cock out of his boxers and gave him a few quick strokes. 
“Fuck,” he bit out. You waited before you did any more; you wanted to be told what to do, but you were mortified to admit it. 
“What is it, baby girl?” he asked. You looked up at him, your hand wrapped around his cock, begging him to understand. 
He gave a quiet hum, seeming to realize what you wanted. He put his hand to your throat, just firm enough to let you feel the pressure of his fingertips. He met your eyes, looking for permission; you put your hand on his wrist and held his gaze.
“You like this, sweetheart?” he asked, giving you every chance to say no.
You looked up at him from under your lashes. “Yes, sir,” you said, incredibly coy for someone who still felt the pressure and heat of his tongue between your legs.
He studied your face. “You like to be controlled, huh, baby girl? Wanna be told what to do?”
You ran your hands up his thighs, just enough to tease, pushing him a little; he tightened his grip, just enough to make you still.
“Don’t be naughty,” he warned. He leaned forward and kissed you. “Tell me what you want, sweetheart.”
“Javi,” you managed. “Wanna suck your cock, sir.”
“I don’t know, dollface. Only good girls get what they want. You disobeyed me earlier, didn’t you?”
You couldn’t help the whimper that escaped you. Now you were getting down to it. You’d disobeyed him and, like it said on your DEA profile, Agent Peña was in charge of any disciplinary action that needed to be taken in your case.
“But you’ve been such a good girl,” he mused. His thumb ran under your jaw, caressing the place he’s put a love mark earlier. “You won’t disobey again, will you, baby?”
“No,” you breathed.
His grip tightened. “No what?”
“No sir,” you whined.
“Good girl,” he praised. He moved his hand from your neck to your hair, brushing it back with intentional tenderness. You took that as your permission and moved your hand up and down his cock, drinking in the sounds he made as you pleasured him.
“Oh, fuck,” he breathed. A string of Spanish curses fell from his mouth, somehow melodic; you took him as deeply as you could manage, swallowing around him, running your tongue up the underside of his cock. He tasted so good, and his breathy moans were like music; you put your hands on his thighs as he tangled his fingers in your hair.
“So good, baby, god - ” His voice pitched up sweetly. “You’re so good. Fuck.” He only just managed to keep himself from fucking his hips against your face, trembling under your hands.
“Wait, baby, hold on,” he gasped. You came off of him with a pop and looked up at him, waiting for direction; he swiped his thumb over your bottom lip.
“Don’t wanna come yet, sweetheart,” he said, his chest pumping. Sweat shone on his chest where his button-down was undone. “And if I let you go any more, I’d be done for.”
“Yes sir,” you said breathlessly, your voice hoarse.
“Fuck,” he breathed. “Good girl.” He stood and brought you up with him.
“I want you,” you said petulantly, your hands roaming everywhere. “Please, Javi.”
“Hold on, honey.” He took both your wrists in one hand. “You’re gonna do as I say?”
You kissed him hungrily. “Yes. Please. I want to do what you say.”
He kissed you and bit your bottom lip. “Bend over my desk, baby girl.”
You did as he said, pushing files aside to brace yourself against his desk; you felt him draw close to you, giving himself a few strokes before he drew his cock between your legs.
“Easy, baby,” he soothed, putting one hand on your hip, holding you steady; his other hand gently brushed over your ass. “Can you be patient for me?”
You pushed back against his hips. “Yes, sir. I want you.”
“I know, honey,” he said. He reached around to circle your clit with slow, deliberate movements, making you give a breathy little moan.
“You sound so pretty when you’re needy,” he praised.
“Please,” you said. You were confident he knew what you meant.
He leaned down to kiss the back of your neck. “Since you asked so sweetly.”
He pushed into you quickly, all the way to the hilt; you gasped as he filled you, warm and tight and almost too much.
“Alright, baby?” he asked gently. You knew he was being sincere, and he gave you a moment to settle. You took a deep breath and moved against him, desire and pleasure washing through you with even that small movement.
“Please, Javi,” you whined.
He started to move his hips against you, each stroke deep and intentional. His hips snapped against yours at a steady and delicious pace, filling you, dragging across the spot that made you moan and whimper.
“Fuck, you feel so good,” Javi said, his voice tight and heavy with desire. “You’re so beautiful, baby. Can’t believe I get to be with you like this.”
“Javi,” you keened. His fingers circled your clit, bringing you to the edge as your pleasure grew. “You’re so good, Javi, oh - fuck - ”
You tightened around him as you tried not to cum, wanting to finish with him. His grip on your hip tightened.
“‘M close, sweetheart,” he said.
“Fuck, me too,” you gasped. “Oh, please - ”
“Cum with me, baby,” he managed. “Come on my cock, sweetheart.”
He pushed into you and pressed deeply against your clit; your orgasm washed over you with blinding pleasure, and you called out his name like a prayer. As you tightened around him, he came too, groaning like you’d torn his heart out of his chest.
“Christ,” he breathed, leaning his head against your back. He kissed your neck and stood you up as he pulled out of you, steadying you as your legs shook with ebbing waves of pleasure.
“That was incredible, sweetheart,” he said breathlessly. He turned you around to face him, holding you close, leaning his forehead against yours.
“Thank you, Javi,” you said.
He gave a quiet laugh. “Anytime, querida.”
You wanted to kiss him again, but feared it might be too intimate; he pressed his mouth to yours and kissed you tenderly, slowly.
“Don’t disobey me again,” he said, though his warning was gentle and you knew it came from a place of worry and care for you.
You shook your head. “No, sir.”
You could feel his smile against your mouth. “Good girl. Such a good girl for me.”
Tumblr media
tag list: @tv-saved-the-teenage-girl​​, @punkgeekchic​​ ♡
let me know if you want to be added to my pedro pascal character taglist!
371 notes · View notes
nagitolovebug · 3 years
Note
Oh no what happened when bebi and kamukoma got separated by ff? Also it would be amazing to read about the whole bebiverse if you ever did want to write a whole fic on it!!!
>:3 Izuru knew it was coming. How could he not? In the days approaching Bebi's first birthday, he has a decision to make- take his family and run, or let the FF take them and see what happens. Ultimately, he decides letting the FF take them would be the path of least resistance, less strenuous for everyone. So he does nothing. He watches his husband plan for Bebi's birthday party, pile of horrible, handmade plushes and blankets waiting for them. The day they turn one, their parents take them to the beach. Izuru didn't want agents rooting around and destroying their home. They watch Bebi toddle on the beach, smiling silently. They were always a quiet baby. They hadn't even cried when they were born. He sees the FF agents approaching on the horizon, far earlier than he had anticipated. He thought he'd have more time with them. He kisses Nagito like he's never gonna see him again, holds him close to feel his heartbeat. "Nagito. Whatever happens next, do not doubt that I love you." "Izuru..?" And then he holds Bebi's face and it hurts him looking at their eyes and how they stare at him like they know. "My precious child. You have irrevocably changed my life for the better. You are the most important thing in my life, and I love and cherish you deeply. If you remember anything of your father, remember these words, my dear Bebi. I love you, and always will." Izuru had been under the impression the agents coming for them were peaceful, not putting up a fight as they were surrounded. Nagito had no idea this was going to happen at all. "IZURU, TAKE BEBI AND RUN!" It's the first time Nagito has ever been in any way authoritative with Izuru, but Izuru knows this is the safest for everyone so he doesn't. Especially because he doesn't wanna separate his family. And Nagito's heart breaks when Izuru lets himself get shackled. Nagito is backing away desperately, holding Bebi bundled up so tight in his arms, pressed against his chest "Don't touch my baby- don't TOUCH MY BABY- STAY AWAY FROM ME! PLEASE, YOU CAN'T DO THIS! LET GO, LET GO- IZURU! IZURU, PLEASE, PLEASE, HELP SOMEBODY HELP ME, THEY'RE TAKING THEM, PLEASE DONT TAKE AWAY MY BABY, PLEASE-" Izuru twitches, hearing the screams, clenching his fists and his jaws, eyes stinging at hearing someone he loves beg so desperately and not being able to do anything about it. A god for the very first time feeling helpless. He's never felt more human. He wishes being human didn't mean being disgusting and ashamed and useless. Nagito manages to slip the ring he had received from Izuru around his neck onto his baby's neck (a keepsake in case they're never reunited) before his is tased in the back by an agent, crumpling to the ground immediately as someone grabs his baby, thrashing and kicking and screaming himself hoarse demanding the give his baby back, don't touch his baby, give them back. When Bebi is ripped from their father's arms, they begin to wail, horribly- sounds they had never made before wrenched out of them in fear and confusion. Izuru hadn't expected they'd use force. Watching his husband crumple to the ground makes him see red, incapacitating one of the agents detaining him and ready to kill the other. Until Makoto Naegi approaches him holding Bebi. There's blood on his jaw and he could kill Naegi faster than he could blink, but he wouldn't try anything- not when his baby was in danger. "Don't hurt my child. Don't touch my child. ....please. They haven't done anything." "My sins are mine alone. Free Nagito and Bebi. I'll comply without struggle." "I'm sorry, Izuru-kun, we can't do that." Izuru flinches. Nobody except Nagito called him that. Junko did once and he tore a clump of her ugly pigtail off her head. "Don't call me that. Free my husband and my child at once-" "We won't hurt you. I promise. The baby will be safe while you all receive treatment. I'm here to help you, not to punish you." "You tased Nagito-" He sighs. "I made them promise not to use force. Byak- Togami’s men are...not used to such delicate situations. I really am sorry. Komaeda-kun has been
through a lot, right? I dont wanna make his rehabilitation any harder by worsening his health." "If any harm comes to either of them-" "I will not let anything happen to Komaeda-kun or the child-" "Bebi." "Bebi, Kamukura-san. I swear on my life." "What is your pathetic life to the safety of my family? Pray that your life is all you lose if you break your promise. If there is a single scratch on either of them, I will make sure you and your loved ones suffer before I crush you under my heels. I swear on my life. And that's a promise that holds weight." He turns away. "Put us in the same room. I wish not to be separated." "....of course." The moment they're left alone together, Nagito slaps his husband across the face. He's incensed. He's grieving. He doesn't understand why his husband didn't save their baby. "Don't speak to me. Don't look at me. You let them take Bebi away. We're done." He isolates himself in a lone corner on the ship, back turned to Izuru, curling in on himself and sobbing. Izuru eventually goes over, wraps himself around Nagito, allows Nagito to thrash and weakly try to hit him before he turns around and bawls into Izuru's chest, Izuru rubbing his back and pressing a single kiss to the crown of his head. "...I'm sorry. I didn't want to put Bebi in danger. I'll get us out of here soon." By the time they are ready to be put under, Nagito has finally grown compliant and is entirely in a daze, Izuru coercing him to calmness with constant promises of their escape. On their way to the pods, he hears the softest, "Papa?" and goes berserk. “Bebi, please give me back my Bebi, I need to hold them.” He headbutts the person escorting him and they pass out (how lucky!) and dodges agents jumping for him and runs to Bebi. They're all reaching for their guns thinking he's gonna hurt the kid but he falls to his knees and just holds them, and he can't even do it properly bc his hands are shackled, but he touches them all he can to make sure they're alright and the sobbing is haunting. "Please don't take them again, I'll do anything you want, please don't take my baby, my baby, they're all I have- please, just an hour, fifteen minutes, just- just let me see they're ok, I need to see for myself that they're ok-!" And it's...the notorious, fearsome Servant....begging. It's incredible to see him reduced to that. Bebi's just got their chubby little arms around Nagito's neck and they're resting on his shoulder and it's the quietest and calmest they've seen Bebi since they were taken- they cry incessantly for the longest time, only stopping when they pass out. Nagito rocks them and pets their hair and frantically checks their ribs, their heart, making sure there’s no bruises. Izuru never got to say goodbye. He chooses not to go see Bebi when Nagito lashes out. Makoto turns to him but he just holds a shackled hand up. "It'll only make it harder." And he doesn't say for whom. Nagito kisses Bebi's face and their head and pets them and whispers, "I love you so much, more than anything in the world, please stay safe until I come back for you. Bebi, my darling baby, I will come back for you. I won't leave you. I'm so sorry." And then asks Makoto to jab him with the tranquilizer so he doesn't have to watch his baby get taken from him again. The last time Bebi sees their papa outside the pod is when his arms go limp around them and he's dragged away.
This impacts them all for years to come. The entire family gets a certain anxiety around Bebi's birthday, so much so that Bebi never wants to celebrate. Bebi (and Hajime, for that matter) has nightmares of their Papa screaming and terrible separation anxiety, latching onto the items they had with them during the program (Nagito's jacket and Nagito's ring)- if at any point they do not have those 2 items with them, it's likely they'll panic. Bebi didn't have their own room for the longest time because Nagito would wake in a panic and have to check and make sure they were still in the house, or insist they slept on the bed in between him and Hajime. Later on, if Nagito or Hajime are away on missions, or they are apart from the twins, they'll spiral into panics insisting that their being apart will result in someone's death. The trauma from being separated from their parents is hugely influential to how they interact with their family and their motivation for reviving the NWP...and starting another killing game.
34 notes · View notes
sewercentipede · 2 years
Text
i completely deserve to be miserable but not make other people miserable by my misery !!!! I’m destroying someone else’s life and psyche and causing them deep trauma bc of how I am and i feel like the only thing i have actual real power over is whether I let myself stay in their life and continue reducing them to a traumatized shell of a person or I leave them so that they can have a chance to be happy, heal from the damage I’ve already caused them, not suffer more trauma and abuse, respect themselves, not be full of resentment and fear and trauma-responses anymore
It just sucks that I have already caused so much misery for someone else because they now have deep wounds that they have to contend with for as long as it takes for them to heal from and still probably deal with their whole life
I don’t wana leave them but I am just growing rapidly worse and worse over time and it’s like the amount of problems I have to work on, versus the amount of permanent problems I’m causing them in the meantime, Its absolutely going to be a net negative for them
I wish I just never came into their life in the first place.. that was the biggest mistake & If I could go back in time to undo that I would. all Ive brought them is detriment that they don’t deserve . But going into it I didn’t know that all I have to bring to the table as a person is negativity and abuse
if id known the type of truly awful person id be and how much I’d suffer and cause suffering to others I’d have killed myself as a teenager at how bleak my future would be and how much of an irredeemable monster id become. and ik suicide causes suffering too but my family has each other to lean on and they would cope and heal together and by this time it’d be ~15 years later and they’d have made what peace they could with it by now and probably only think well of me . Idk I’m just saying stuff probably.
I don’t want to get back on benzos but i do. bc ive come to a Turning point where I cannot cope with anything In life, anything, any small thing, at all. the distress is horrific. and it’s really destroying his life. I’m destroying his life. benzos make me able to cope. but I destroyed his life with my past benzo addiction too. So it’s a catch22. I don’t know what to do except leave him to save him, and get back on benzos to avoid killing myself.
it makes me sad but oh my god he doesn’t realize how much better off he would be without me causing all these problems for him to deal with and I am witnessing him kill himself inside little by little and become an anxious fearful person he never used to be because of me and my abuse
13 notes · View notes
chrisevansgoodgirl · 3 years
Text
if you’re going crazy, just grab me and take me
summary: after the worst year with this fucking family, Ransom proposes on ❄️ chrstmas eve  ❄️ it obviously doesn’t go over as well as his emotionally-stunted ass thought it would.
warnings: every god damn word in this thing is a problem. rough smut. choking, anal, hair-pulling, biting, this shit makes the first chapter seem light, i’ll just say that. a lot of fighting. verbal and physical. there’s some fluff but don’t let ransom trick you like he’s obviously tricked me.
word count: this shit is almost 25,000 fucking words 😂😂😂. i dead ass kept being like why the fuck am I taking so long to post this? Then I saw the word count and I 😳🤭🤗😂 someone pls tell me i did not just devote 25,000 words to exposing myself as a weak ass hoe for Ransom. pls tell me this is a fever dream. i can’t.
pairing: ransom drysdale x reader
a/n: holy fuck, am i a disaster. i apologize, i kept falling asleep and wow, i’m just confused about my entire process for writing this bc it was abnormal af.
part one: x part two: x (however, you don’t really need to read them to understand this mess? pretty sure.)
Tumblr media
Christmas Eve:
It somehow felt that the entire hellscape that you were currently living in had simultaneously transpired yesterday but also years ago. That was the common feeling one was left with in times of so much exposure to Thrombeys. It was a whirlwind, but there were the good moments, and then the really bad moments, but then the kind of fun moments… It was a rollercoaster, honestly. One you had incorrectly believed you could cope with.
Meg and Joni had called you in a panic from the ski lodge they’d gone to in Canada. There was talk of stopping all flights, how were they going to get home? And lord, what about their home? Were they really supposed to stay there? Since being cut off, Joni had made some career moves that were smart, but she still had to scale back. They were in a much smaller place than before, one that was only temporary—Joni claimed as much about one million times while signing the papers for it.
Jacob had been the next to call, a hysterical Donna could be heard in the background. They had also been moving into another home because of financial issues. You weren’t sure what the ploy was with having Jacob call. Out of everyone in the family, he was the one you spoke to the least, maybe in competition with his irritating mother. Perhaps that had been the angle, were you really going to leave them isolated with their possibly murderous son in such a small house in an unknown neighborhood?
The answer was no. You weren’t going to leave out any Thrombeys. The Drysdales, on the other hand… You had made your terms quite clear. So, with the news of a quarantine sweeping across the country, these overprivileged people flocked to the house they had once called their own. But it was your house now, and that meant it was well within your right to exclude Linda and Richard.
The night you had told Ransom about it was…quite a night.
March: the arrival,
Your grand idea was to deliver the news quickly, over a drink when he was in the best mood he could be. You casually told him that Joni and Meg would be arriving first, then Walt, Donna, and Jacob.
He stared for a long time before simply stating, “I will not let them in the house.”
You rolled your eyes. “Ransom—”
He leaned forward, slamming his glass down on the table between you. “It’s not happening.”
You arched an eyebrow. Was he trying to be intimidating? Oh, you would be just terrified if you were an elderly author or poor nurse tasked with caring for the mentioned author. Seeing as you were his girlfriend, he was out of luck on that.
“I will lock the doors,” he declared, standing to place his hands on his hips. “Not one of those assholes is getting in here. You understand me?”
Instead of answering, you grabbed your drink and returned to the magazine in your lap. That was probably Ransom’s greatest source of irritation, when you decided you were done with the dramatics and ignored him.
He scoffed. “The fact that you think this is happening… It just goes to show—you call me a narcissist, but clearly, you are the narcissist! It takes one to know one!”
It takes one to know one? “Are you five?”
He crossed his arms over his chest.
With a soft sigh, you turned the page. It was silent for several seconds and you weren’t sure if he was trying to build up to something or if he just had nothing else left to try. Whatever it was, you told yourself you were ready for it. How many years was it now? You couldn’t be surprised anymore.
“Are you only with me for sex?”
And you stood corrected. Narrowing your eyes, you looked up at him. “I’m sorry?”
“You clearly don’t care about my feelings—”
“Ransom, seriously, shut up. This is happening, okay? Your family is scared right now, you could try being human. This was their home for a time, of course, they want to be somewhere they feel comfort—”
“No, I’m putting my foot down.”
You rolled your eyes again. “You don’t have a foot to put down. This is my house, too.”
“Too,” he repeated firmly. “Too!”
“Ransom,” you snapped, getting to your feet and throwing the magazine on the table. “Stop acting like a child. They will be here tomorrow. I’m going to bed and if you wanted to join me, that would be great.”
He sat back down, a clear indication that that was not happening.
Things with Ransom, since the last argument, hadn’t been as tense as you thought they would be. Majorly, nothing really changed. Well, sex changed. You guys just weren’t doing that, which was major, because of the rate at which it had been occurring. But other than that, nothing changed. He wasn’t ignoring you, he wasn’t not touching you, there was very simple no sex. At all. But was that something you were okay with? Hell no. It was getting old and you were getting fucking tired of it.
“Fine, if you don’t, just know that I am keeping track.”
“Track?” he narrowed his eyes. “Of what?”
“How many nights I’ve slept without you and how many nights you’ve gone without fucking me.”
“After your last indiscretion, did you really expect anything else? Which you still haven’t apologized for, by the way.”
“Apologize?” you scoffed. “For keeping a fucking vibrator? What do you want me to say, Ransom? Sorry that I have yet to give you total control over my body?”
“That is exactly what I want to hear.”
Without another word, you simply rolled your eyes at him and stormed off to the room you had once upon a time shared with your boyfriend. Not that he officially moved out. In fact, he was still sleeping in there and kept his shit in there. But he was not falling asleep with you nor was he was present when you woke up.
You had no idea what he was doing in there and you were trying to be human, unlike Ransom. Everyone deserved privacy. Besides, he’d made you your sunroom and it afforded him a lot of forgiveness. It was this tiny extension of the house that had huge windows and was just small enough to fit your yoga mat, a couch, and about a billion plants. You read there a lot, you also escaped Ransom a few times. You could understand his desire for an office. But as frequently as he was using it? That was scary.
Admittedly, it was difficult to stay mad at him when you walked through the house that you’d almost now completely rebuilt together. The only exclusion being the office. It had been one of those Harlan rooms that you’d never actually been in prior because you were not family. Weeks ago, you watched Ransom remove everything, add new things, but you still hadn’t been inside. He didn’t so much tell you that it was his own personal room, but it was very clear in how he locked the door. Like, all the time.
You had already been prepping for bed, knowing that the discussion was going to be exhausting. You threw yourself straight into bed, not overly optimistic about the possibility that you were going to fall asleep.
Maybe it was the argument, the mention, the acknowledgment that you guys weren’t having sex. Did he even care? It didn’t seem like it. That caused concern for you. You’d always thought that you would be much older when the two of you would be having no sex. You wondered if things were changing, if your relationship was changing.
Officially, it was hopeless. You were not going to fall asleep. You were just about to get back up when you heard him walking up the stairs, you froze, held your breath, hoped that maybe he wanted to end this. Instead, he walked by the room and to the end of the hall, where said office was.
Fine, fuck him. You just had to get up and moving, there was no shortage of shit you had to prepare. Jacob, though terrible, was family, and a teenage boy. You were going to set him up in a smaller room on the bottom floor. Harlan usually had live-in staff stay in that room if they ever fell on hard times. You figured he would enjoy the privacy. Walt might even enjoy not sleeping in the same room as the next Ted Bundy.
Meg’s room was the most used since she stopped by on weekends sometimes when Ransom was gone for the day or stayed out late. They always met in the kitchen when morning came to argue and give you a headache, however.
She probably needed towels in the bathroom. She might even end up wanting different sheets. Jacob would need more sheets. Was there a color you should give him in the case that the little psycho killed someone, if you wanted to prevent stains? Joni’s room had been cleared out except for major furniture so you wanted to get that set before the morning. You had intended to set all of this up at some horribly early hour, but you were too annoyed to try sleeping. What better time than now?
Did you even have food? You would probably need to go to the store in the morning. You would make a careful list and ensure that no one would need to leave the house again because you were not going to let one of these rich idiots get you sick. Food, sheets because as you were walking through the linen closet, you discovered that you didn’t have really any sets of sheets. Then, you would need laundry detergent, fabric softener. Not all the rooms had pillows—
“What the hell are you doing?”
Ransom found you madly scribbling on a notepad in the center of Joni’s room. You didn’t bother to look at him when you answered, “Making a shopping list.”
“May I ask what for?”
“We have no sheets or pillows or food…or really anything, Ransom. Are we fucking vampires?”
He sighed as he made his way to you. “Okay, it’s time for bed.”
“Go away if you’re not going to be helpful.”
“No, get up now.” But he was met with nothing but silence. Instead of trying another round of verbal communication, he effortlessly grabbed your arms and picked you up.
“Ransom!”
He abruptly took your face in his hands. “They’re lucky they even get to be here. You’re not doing a single thing for these people.”
“Stop, okay? This is our house, we have to have these things—”
“No, you stop. Stop trying to do anything for them because no matter what, they’re going to complain.”
You glared. “Are you trying to help? Just go back to your stupid office and leave me be.”
He arched an eyebrow at you. “It is time for bed. I’m taking you to the room—”
“I’m just going to sneak out as soon as you leave for your office, so don’t waste my time or yours—”
He abruptly threw you up over his shoulder.
“Ransom!” you shrieked in absolute panic, he had never done this. Dragged you kicking and screaming? Yes. Literally pulled you along the floor by your legs? Yes. This? No, not once.
He was quick to get to the room, worried about how exactly you would react, what you were willing to do to make him drop you. He tossed you down on the mattress.
“You’re such an ass! I have to—”
He silenced you by pulling off his T-shirt.
So, he interrupted you because he wanted to have sex? After he had been withholding it? You feigned an unbothered expression. “Ransom, fuck off.”
He scowled. “Why did I have to find you? Why did life bring you to me? Personally, the meaningless fucking was fine for me, a lot less trouble.”
You scoffed. “Do you think I like being with you?! You’re the worst person I’ve ever fucking met, possibly the worst person on this fucking planet!”
He rolled his eyes. “Get on your knees.”
“You are not serious.”
“I am.”
“No, you’re seriously fucking insane, but you’re not serious in that you actually think that’s going to happen!”
“Get. On. Your. Knees. You can do it on your own or I can do it for you.”
You weighed your options. You wanted to have sex with your boyfriend, you wanted to be close to him. However, if he left you after you sucked him off, you might end up killing him. But what could you do? Ransom was apparently in a mood.
Whatever theatrics that were going to occur tonight were already planned, you realized. If he was going to walk away, he was going to walk away. No amount of arguing or any other behavioral tactics were going to change that. You would hit him, you were sure of that, but at least you could get back to making your home presentable.
You reached back for a pillow and gave him a challenging look. He arched an eyebrow at you as you slowly jumped off the bed, laid your pillow at his feet and got to your knees.
“The fuck is this? You suddenly a princess?”
“I’ve always been a princess,” you declared. “One day, a wonderful man or woman, who’s going to give me an even bigger house, is going to know it.”
He glared. “What the fuck is your problem? Do I need to start paying you to keep your mouth shut?”
You snorted. “You have money?”
And that was, apparently, a line crossed for Ransom. Furiously, without another word, he yanked his pants open and shoved them down with his boxers.
Instead of staring at his cock in front of your face, you looked up at him.
He sighed. “Y/N, suck my cock.”
You shrugged. “Why?”
He took himself in one hand and grabbed your hair in the other. He brought your mouth to the head of his cock and waited patiently. You did nothing, simply kept your gaze on him. Rolling his eyes, he pulled at your hair.
You attempted to keep your lips clamped but he continued yanking until you opened your mouth to cry out. Then, without hesitation, he shoved his cock down your throat. You gagged instantly, hands snapping up to shove at his thighs. He wouldn’t budge, he kept you there no matter how hard you tried to push him away—which, admittedly, since you were so wet, wasn’t very hard—or how many times you gagged.
His free hand touched your cheek. “You’re fucking beautiful like this.”
He could fuck off—as soon as he was done coming, you would walk away. You didn’t even want to be fucked by him anymore. But sadly, you had missed the taste of him, the feel of his skin on your tongue.
When he finally pulled you off his cock, you gasped for air. Then, once again, he was thrusting back in. You were choking on him, eyes watering, throat burning, drooling, sniffling, hands begging to be let up again with how hard they gripped his thighs.
But Ransom only let you off when he wanted. The second time, he allowed you to try to catch your breath. Your head was spinning since you were not quite getting oxygen back fast enough. You were blinking away those tiny black spots appearing behind your eyes. He used one hand to wipe away the tears on your cheeks and whatever was falling down your chin.
Then he was bringing you down once more. Holding you in place, he began fucking your mouth slowly, gently, two words that normally did not apply to Ransom. He took his time, he wanted you aching and craving him, and you really fucking were. You thought you wouldn’t feel a thing if he walked away after thing, but now, you knew you were going to set that office on fire if he tried it.
As he neared his end, he grew noisier. You liked that about Ransom, he didn’t hold back due to some insane fragile masculinity thing—no, that was often displayed in less conventional ways. He liked fucking you and he liked letting you know.
He picked up speed eventually, paying no mind to the sounds of you choking every time he thrust in a tad too hard. You didn’t even care, you knew you would be soaking wet, if you just reached down and felt…
He yanked you down when he was coming, buried deep in your throat, reveling in the feel of your throat moving around him, trying not to choke, trying to breathe. “Don’t make a mess, baby, swallow everything I’m giving you.”
You tried, really, you were not just playing your usual game of disobedience. But he really was choking you, so when you tried to swallow, things did not go according to plan. You gagged, nothing was swallowed. A mess you did create. On him, the floor, yourself, the pillow.
Ransom pulled you off and then grabbed your arm to haul you up. His hand still in your hair, he forced you to look up at him, bending your neck back almost uncomfortably. You were still struggling with lack of oxygen and just about fell into him completely, clearly being bratty was not on your mind.
He waited patiently, as if he wanted an explanation. No, you did not intend to do the opposite of what he had told you, but you weren’t about to let him know that. “Baby,” he cooed. His hand slid up from your arm to your neck where some of his cum was sliding down toward your chest. “What was what?”
“Out of practice, I guess. It’s been months since you’ve touched me.” Okay, it had just barely been two months yesterday, but if he could be dramatic, you were allowed as well.
He arched an eyebrow. “Considering you only need to say one word to me, I don’t think you really want it that bad.”
“You’re right, I don’t.”
His expression fell. He had hoped you would desperately blurt out an apology, clearly. Without another word, he shoved you onto the bed.
You stared up at him, face composed. “Don’t you have an office to be in?”
“You seem very jealous of that office, baby.”
“Why would I be? I finally get to be away from you.”
He leaned forward and grabbed your shorts and panties. The way he ripped them off you was damn near violent. You both wanted something rough tonight. “Then why is your pussy wet?”
You shrugged. “Couldn’t be for you. I can’t remember the last time you made me come.”
He leaned over, slowly crawling his way up your body.
Without prompt, you reached between your bodies and pulled your shirt over your head, arching a little more than necessary.
He took your forearms and pinned them to the bed. “Tell me how bad you need me.”
You shook your head. “I don’t.”
“I’m not joking.”
“I’m not joking,” you countered. “I. Don’t. Need. You.”
He took your jaw in one hand, forcing you to meet his stare. “Y/N, seriously.”
He really wasn’t joking, but again, neither were you. “Ransom, if you walk out before you fuck me, I will leave you. Do you understand me? I’ll fucking disappear, and you will never ever see me again.”
He smirked. “I understand.”
“I need you,” you breathed, free arm sliding around his shoulder, clinging tight. “I really fucking need you. I need you inside me. You know it’s been too long.”
Smiling like he just won the lottery, he rolled onto his side a little, turning your hips with him. “Yes,” he agreed. “Too long, baby, I’m sorry.”
You knew he wasn’t. You felt his tip at your entrance and you held your breath. He was a dick, yes, but you had been absolutely starving for his touch, his attention.
He pressed inside and it stung almost as bad as it had the first time. You turned your head away, hand pressed to your mouth to keep quiet. You hadn’t noticed your eyes were filled with tears until he touched your cheek and you blinked in surprise. You weren’t sure what you were crying about, the pain or the relief of finally feeling him.
You kept yourself turned from him, hoping he would just drop it. Of course, he wouldn’t. Of course, the one time you were willing to give Ransom a pass to be a complete ass, he wouldn’t want to take it.
“Sorry, baby girl,” he cooed. He had stopped, letting you adjust to him. However, Ransom didn’t have an ounce of patience and you knew his restraint was slipping. “I’m sorry, I’ll make it better.”
You also knew he wasn’t sorry. You squeezed your eyes shut until he was buried inside you. Feeling so full was something you had missed but feeling wanted was what you had been longing for. He could say the words, he could give you lingering looks when you were wearing a dress or a tight top, but it wasn’t the same. It didn’t convince you like when he just grabbed you and used you to satisfy every sick desire he had.
He grabbed your face and forced you to turn back but your eyes were shut. Instead of trying to get you to look at him, he kissed you. His lips moved over yours until you were finally curling into him, his arm wrapped around your back and pinned you against him.
Intimate, close, slow, but so fucking hard, that was how he made you come the first time. There were no words, just grabbing each other, gasping into the kiss, biting one another’s lips, tongue and teeth, scratching nails, pulling hair. He watched your face as you were coming down, hips still snapping up, fingers brushing along your cheeks.
He rolled onto his back and brought you with him. You hissed at the ache of this new angle, using your knees to pull off just a little. He took your hands and set them to the headboard. The way he stared up at you, like he was worshiping every inch of you, it made your skin burn.
“Ride me,” he ordered.
Hands gripping the bed, your hips began to roll. Ransom stared the whole time, where his cock was disappearing inside you, your moving breasts, your gorgeous, soft body. He used one hand to pinch your nipples alternatively and the opposite hand to focus solely on your clit.
You were breathless, shaking, chasing after that climbing high. You let the headboard go in favor of grabbing his hands, dragging them up to circle around your neck. As he began to apply pressure, you continued bouncing on his cock, unashamedly screaming now that he was stifling the noise.
Watching your eyes fill with tears, hearing those strangled sounds tear from your throat, it was enough to get him there as soon as your cunt started to tighten. He was coming with you, squeezing your neck tighter, so tight you tried to pull his hands off you.
But it was futile, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. He threw you down, rolling over so he was on top of you. You wrapped your legs around him, spreading your thighs and taking him in deeper.
He set one hand to the mattress to hold himself up but kept his other hand on your neck. He leaned over, forehead pressing to yours, breathing hotly against your skin. “Say it again.”
“Say what?” you choked out.
“You know.”
You always knew. He had only asked you for this one other time since you’d said it that first night. You stopped caring that he was probably never going to say it back. “I love you.”
His hips finally stilled. You weren’t sure what his response was going to be, but you knew what it wasn’t going to be. Yes, you’d stopped caring, but were you okay with it? You weren’t entirely convinced. But what were you going to do? Leave Ransom? That seemed highly unlikely.
So, you decided to speak before he could. “Even though you’re a fucking loser.”
He scoffed, shaking his head. “And I guess you’re hot enough to keep around even if that mouth annoys the hell out of me.”
That, you suspected, was as close as he was going to get to ever stating his feelings for you. “Are you going to let me get back to my list?”
He rolled his eyes. “No. Not done yet.”
You arched an eyebrow. “Really? You lasted, like, three minutes—”
He gave you a sharp look. “Must be my age, I guess I’ll need a minute before I can go again. But you, baby girl,” he grabbed one of your hands and brought your fingers up to his lips.
You watched closely as he kissed every knuckle before he brought your hand down and pressed your first two fingers to your clit. You shuddered. “Ransom, wait—”
“Since you like getting yourself off so much, you’re going to—”
You sighed. “Ransom, please—”
“And I’m going to watch until I’m ready to fuck you again.”
You pouted up at him. “You said it was time for bed.”
“I changed my mind.” He pulled your legs from around him and sat back to watch you. He pulled one thigh further from the other and gave you an expectant look. “I wasn’t asking, baby.”
Tumblr media
For what felt like the first time in years, you were woken up by your boyfriend with his hand between your legs. You were laying on his chest, he was kissing the top of your head, tracing patterns along your spine and just barely teasing your clit.
All he needed to know was that you were awake and then had you pinned underneath him before you could say a word. Last night was nice but now the sun was shining through the blinds and you could see all of him. The freckles on his skin, the fine lines around his mouth because he does actually smile even if he doesn’t want anyone to know. And all his muscles—ugh.
“Good morning,” he said softly.
You smiled. “I have to get up and start getting ready.”
“No, baby. The only thing you need to do is open your legs so your boyfriend can fuck you like you deserve to be fucked.”
“Oh, deserve?” you scoffed. “I always deserve to be fucked. What changed your mind?”
He shrugged his shoulder. “Does it matter?”
Few things did when it really came down to your relationship with Ransom. It was all one huge give-and-take and neither of you shied away from taking advantage of that lack of communication.
He kept you there for nearly half an hour, insisting that you give him just one more finish, but he’d done that nearly four times. The reason you were able to escape was that there was someone at the door. As Ransom when to see who it was, you ran for the shower.
You were surprised when he joined you. One of your favorite things in your entire relationship was taking showers with Ransom, but it rarely happened. Whether that be because you were always on a time limit when you were getting ready or because he woke up later than you.
He wrapped his arms around your waist, chin resting on your shoulder.
“I miss taking showers with you, you’re warm.”
He turned to kiss your cheek. “You going shopping?” he muttered against your skin.
“Yeah, we don’t have anything either. We’re out of your favorite cookies, you know.”
He hummed. “Okay, just be safe. Wear a mask and try not to touch anything you don’t have to. Put everything in the back of your car, I put hand sanitizer in there so use it before you touch anything inside.”
You scoffed as you looked back, eyebrow arching. “You sound scared.”
He shrugged. “Well, you know… I just don’t want you to get sick.”
You smiled a little.
“Because I don’t want to have to take care of you.”
“Ugh, Ransom!” You brought your hand up to flick his forehead, but he caught your wrist and used the opposite hand to turn you around.
His arm slid across the small of your back and he picked you up to walk you to the shower wall. He pinned you against it completely, the shower head was almost directly over the two of you. Instead of attempting to watch him, you closed your eyes and pulled him into a kiss by his hair. He angled his hips up and easily thrust inside you.
Your mouth dropped and you gasped, he used that as his chance to bite down on your lip. You were sore between your legs, but the ache was a reminder that Ransom had put aside his pettiness because he had wanted you so badly. You brought your leg up to hook around his hip and used that as your leverage as you began to roll your hips.
He shuddered and bit harder on your lip still trapped between his teeth. He only let it go so he could turn down and press his mouth to your shoulder. “Slow baby, fuck me slow.”
You did as he directed. You slid off his cock and then slid back down, using all the restraint you could muster because you couldn’t wait until his broke. You couldn’t wait for him to grab you and take charge.
His hand slid between the two of you and he began pressing down on your clit, just slightly.
“I could kill you, Ransom,” you blurted out. “You better not ever go so long without touching me again.”
He nodded. “I promise, I will not.”
If you had a question about his tone, it died when his hands finally grasped your hips. “Tell me what you want.”
“Hard,” you pleaded. “So hard, please. I want to feel you all day, I want it to hurt until you’re inside me again.”
And goodness, did he make it hurt. He fucked you until you could no longer stand, until you weren’t able to coherently tell him that you weren’t sure you would ever be able to on your own again.
He had to set you on the floor of the tub when he knew it was time to get out. You weren’t sure why, and if you had been in a better mindset, you would have remembered the importance of always asking Ransom questions about his actions. However, all you could do was stay still, a little dizzy, vibrating pleasantly all over.
It somehow felt like hours but only seconds that he left you alone. When he was standing you back up, you still didn’t have the good sense to ask what the hell he was doing, but you absolutely melted when he pulled you from the shower and wrapped you up in a warm towel. A towel that had clearly just come out of the dryer—this man, that he could be so perfect and just chose not to be, deserved to be in jail. Yeah, the murder thing was a strike against him, you guessed, but this? Unforgivable.
Tumblr media
When you got back home, there were several cars that you had never seen. Somehow, despite not getting an inheritance, the Thrombeys still knew how to make money. Which just made the whole Harlan thing even more annoying. Why all the dramatics? Rich people didn’t get poor the same way poor people got poorer. It was merely a showing of greed.
But you could not dwell on things like that, otherwise, this whole thing was going to go bad much quicker than you had suspected. You also couldn’t be the one that made it go bad. You weren’t an actual Thrombey or a Drysdale—and never would be since you fell in love with the least committal one of them all. You, despite extending your home and kindness, needed to be a lot more behaved than Ransom.
As you were bringing in the groceries, you glanced at the cars. There were five in total and you shuddered to think Jacob was driving. He was about that age, of course, but still, yikes. Meg and Joni probably showed up separately, which meant Donna and Walt did as well. Okay, weird, but you long ago stopped trying to guess why these people did what they did.
You wrestled with the front door for a moment and the noise of it brought in Joni and Meg. The older woman was completely decked out in crystals, unsurprisingly, you had just read an about how crystal shops were doing particularly well at this time.
“Hey, guys,” you greeted.
“Thank you so much for letting us stay here,” Meg immediately responded, taking some of the bags from your hands.
Joni followed her daughter’s lead. “Yes, honey, let us help you.”
Okay, suspicious. These people rarely did a thing that would constitute as the simplest of work—save for Meg, of course. “Thanks, but Ransom really should be helping me.” You gently pressed the door back with your leg, not shutting it completely but trying to keep the cold at bay. “Ransom!”
“He’s in the kitchen,” Joni informed.
“Great, we can head that way.”
On the walk there, you found Donna and Walt were in what was now one of many family rooms. They greeted you a tad overenthusiastically—regardless, you couldn’t stop, you’d just deal with it later.
“You didn’t need to go shopping for us,” Donna said.
“Oh, it’s fine,” you assured. “We needed a few things, I thought I’d get it done all at once so you guys wouldn’t need to worry about it.”
As if given a cue, they all began to thank you again. Again, you would need to deal with this when your arms were less full and there weren’t about a million bags in the back of your car.
You led the way to the kitchen, Meg and Joni on your tail. “Was the trip over here easy enough?”
“So weird,” Joni claimed. “People are literally going insane. I went to my usual crystal shop before I got here…”
Typical. She proceeded to tell you about how she had an “altercation” with a woman for a tiger’s eye finished into the shape of her animal spirit guide—which you were forgetting at the moment, a swan or something.
You stopped trying to recall those past conversations in case she quizzed you about what your animal was—she had stressed the importance of finding it and you promised you would the next time you saw her—when you saw Richard and Linda sitting at your kitchen table. Ransom was at the counter, a glass of whiskey in hand.
You merely glanced at them before turning to him. There were no words at all for the rage you felt at that moment. Joni had stopped speaking and was working to get the bags she’d taken from you onto a flat surface so she could grab the rest.
“Y/N!” Richard greeted. “Thank you so much for letting us stay here.”
You lifted your eyebrows at Ransom.
“She obviously didn’t know, Richard,” Linda pointed out. “Because she’s been trying to steal my son away since the day that she met him.”
You turned to her. “Are you—?”
“No, no, no,” Joni interjected. “She didn’t mean that!” She set the last of the bags down and touched your shoulder. “She’s joking!” She turned to Linda. “You’re joking, right?”
“Of course,” Linda claimed, unconvincingly with a smirk that you had come to recognize as smug. Not that you’d seen it much on her, but her son, on the other hand…
Speaking of Ransom, he looked beyond exhausted. Only, he wasn’t, he was just trying to convey that because it was clear that he didn’t intend to have this discussion with you. It never was a discussion, because, for some reason, he made all the excuses in the world for his mother and would obviously choose her over you.
Suddenly, in your mind, things all fell into place. Richard and Linda probably got here after all the others, the rest had been set to get there around noon. He’d kept you in bed to stop you from getting home before them because then you could keep them out of the house, you could have caused a huge scene. Now? It was clear that you were outvoted, the rest of the family probably would have thought of you as unreasonable if you kicked them out now.
Fine, it was all fine. You weren’t going to argue about this, not then. It would give Linda joy to see you have a complete meltdown. Ransom had already humiliated you enough by doing this completely behind your back, you weren’t going to give her anything else.
You turned to the counter to grab his keys. “Well, then you get to go back to the store.” You threw the keys at his chest, probably harder than you should have, and turned to head back out to your car.
It was silent until you exited the room, then Linda felt the need to voice her opinion no one asked for. “I’m just saying, I wouldn’t marry her. She’s shopping for essential items the day company was planned to arrive?”
You turned right back around but Meg was there to usher you back outside. She knew you needed a moment of fresh air and a moment away from Linda. Meg was a rather sympathetic person, she understood completely where you were coming from. In her mind, you were right and Ransom was so wrong for what he did, and Linda was wrong as well. But she also told you, this was how this family went. Linda was at the top now that Harlan was gone. If you sincerely wanted to be with Ransom—and she was confused about that—you would have to suck it up.
That much you agreed with, to an extent. It was clear that you were never going to be able to fix these people completely, but you were trying to create boundaries. Linda could not hit your boyfriend, her son. But how was she going to learn that if Ransom didn’t give a damn? She wasn’t.
You were suddenly wishing you’d accepted the invitation from your parents to stay with them until this all settled down. You had been too scared, however, because of the distance that seemed to be growing with Ransom. Now, you just felt like an idiot.
He lied to you. He did this behind your back, and he used intimacy to distract you from his plans, and that was absolutely disgusting. You couldn’t get over that. You felt used, by the one person you’re supposed to be able to trust more than anyone else in the world.
“Meg, can we have a minute?”
You turned away as soon as you heard Ransom off to your side. If you had a minute with him, you would probably murder him.
“Um,” she started, shifting awkwardly.
“It’s fine,” you assured. “Can you start putting away the groceries, please?”
“Yes, I will do that,” she eagerly confirmed. Meg liked to feel helpful, she often felt guilty about her privilege and wanted to be anything but another typical Thrombey. It was refreshing given all the other extreme personalities you would have to be living with for a while.
“I bought enough sheets for every single bed in the house for the next ten years,” you informed. “Those are fine. We’ll just need more food, probably—”
Ransom reached out for your arm, but you jerked away from him.
“Don’t touch me.”
“Hey—”
You finally turned to him. “I am not talking about this. You lied to me, you did this behind my back—”
“She’s my mom—”
“And I’m your girlfriend!” you hissed back. “And I am so fucking tired of this and you. Last night, you had sex with me to distract me so you could fucking sneak your parents in here. Who does that?!”
“That’s not why I had sex with you—”
“Really?” you demanded. No, you wouldn’t be having this talk, it wasn’t happening. Turning away, you sighed, “It doesn’t matter. I’m done talking to you about this, I’m serious. Do whatever the fuck you want, Ransom. That’s what you always do anyway. I’m done caring.”
“Look, we can’t be fighting with these people here—”
“You should have thought about that before you lied to me.”
“I didn’t lie—”
“I’m having a really hard time right now not running you over with my car,” you asserted, “So I’m going to go back inside. I just need you to go to the store for me, okay? Please, can you do one thing, literally, Ransom, just one thing to help me feel, like, 10% less stressed about all of this?”
“Okay. Yeah, I’ll go to the store.”
“Great.” You started to pull out more bags from the car.
“Can we talk about this later?”
“I don’t know yet.” Hell no, but you weren’t going to tell him that. With full arms, you stormed around him and back into the house.
Later, when he got home, he discovered that you had moved out of the bedroom. Yes, you had moved your shit to another room, locked it, and acted as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
April: the parents’ bedroom,
It was six in the morning, you had just failed at finishing your yoga routine due to your pounding headache. You’d thought a smoothie would make you feel much better, but see, that was with the condition that everyone else was still asleep.
Not the case.
Joni and Richard were currently in the middle of a debate about anti-maskers. Joni, surprisingly, given all her healing crystals shit, thought anti-maskers were idiots. Richard, on the other hand, believed this was a free country and people should have the right to choose anything and everything because “that’s America”.
You had a blender full of ingredients and when you finally got to turn it on, it was comparable to an orgasm. If only because you and Ransom were back to a no-touching arrangement. You could barely stand to look at him.
They seemed unbothered by the blender, their argument only getting louder. You went to the cabinet to grab some pills, anything that would make your head feel better. Could anything with these people? You weren’t overly optimistic about that prospect.
You took your place back at the blender, leaning down to fall into the pain of that instead of the politics conversation. They did this often. Last week, it was whether people should vote this November. Prior, it had been traveling bans, canceled events, whether unemployment should be giving people as much as they are. Linda and Walt interjected sometimes, even Meg because she couldn’t remain silent on a few occasions, but you, Ransom, and Jacob all but steered clear of it.
You felt a hand on your shoulder and stood up straight. You didn’t want anyone knowing you weren’t feeling well. Richard and Walt always acted like you were dying, Joni would start with her crystals and lectures about the importance of meditating.
Thankfully, it was just Ransom. He had been out, he was wearing a scarf, a heavy jacket, and his pale cheeks were flushed red. He nodded out of the room and you followed because silence seemed too tempting.
“What is it, Ransom?”
He narrowed his eyes. “I need a reason to speak to you?”
Your eyes fell shut and you pressed your fingers to your temples. He wasn’t being serious right now, was he? He wanted to have a conversation right now? You felt on the verge of death.
He touched your shoulder again. “Are you okay?”
“Just a headache. Not a big deal.”
“Not trying to be an ass—”
You opened your eyes. “But you’re so good at it.”
“I told you this was a bad idea.”
“Ransom,” you sighed, shrugging his hand off.
He caught you before you could turn away. “Hey.”
“Ransom, please, I don’t want to talk about this.”
“I don’t want to talk much either.”
You narrowed your eyes.
He shrugged. “You know I know how to make you feel better when you have a headache.”
You hummed. “Sex? Why? Are you trying to distract me again? Were you hoping I wouldn’t notice your inability to wake up at a reasonable hour for me, but how willing you seem to wake up at 5 in the morning to have coffee with your mommy?”
“I wasn’t asleep,” he insisted. “And she heard me come downstairs.”
“Yes, great cover. So convincing.”
“I do not wake up to have coffee with her every morning. I haven’t been sleeping well.”
You lifted your eyebrows. “Really?”
“Yes.”
“Good.”
He glared. “It’s because I hate sleeping without you.”
“You made me sleep without you—!”
“That was not what you think!”
You narrowed your eyes. “It wasn’t a temper tantrum over the vibrator?”
“No, okay, stop. We’re not going back, okay? No talk about the past, we need to talk about now. You’re the one that made me promise that I wouldn’t withhold sex—”
“I’m not withholding sex, Ransom, I just have no desire to be around you.”
He rolled his eyes. “Doubt that.”
“If you’re having issues sleeping, maybe you should ask your mommy to read you a bedtime story and—”
He pressed his hand over your mouth and started dragging you across the room.
Immediately, you started screaming at him. What the fuck? And you continued to do this until you realized he was leading you to Richard and Linda’s room. Eww, if you didn’t want to talk to him, you certainly didn’t want to talk to her.
But despite your struggling, he forced you into the room and slammed the door before you could escape.
“What the hell?” you demanded.
“This fight is over.”
“No, it’s not!”
“You’re being ridiculous.”
“I’m being ridiculous because I care about you? I’m done, I can’t do this anymore. My parents want me to stay with them and I think I should—”
His eyes widened at you. “This is your god damn house—”
“You clearly don’t think so! I had one condition, just one fucking condition. I wanted her to apologize for trying to physically assault you and somehow that makes me the villain in this situation?”
“That’s not what I’m saying—”
“You went behind my back, Ransom.”
“I’m sorry about that.”
Wow, was that an actual apology? It didn’t matter. One apology a month later was too small. “Look, it’s too late, okay? I’m exhausted and I just want to go home—”
“This is your fucking home!”
“No, it’s your mother’s fucking home and it always will be if you let her do whatever the fuck she wants!”
“She apologized!”
“Oh, please,” you scoffed.
He reached into his pants and yanked out his phone. Easily, he found one of the last texts that they had exchanged and turned it to you.
Don’t tell your psycho, fragile girlfriend but I am sorry. I shouldn’t have acted the way that I did. I understand that it was out of line, it will not happen again. Can we come over? You know I don’t want to be alone with your father.
It took three seconds to go from partially angry to very, absolutely, completely outraged. You smacked the phone out of his hand and it clattered to the hardwood floor. “I’m going to fucking kill you, Ransom!”
He threw his arms up. “For what?!”
“Why didn’t you fucking tell me this earlier?!”
“She would have known that I told you.”
“And?!”
“And,” he began, “I…don’t really know what I thought would happen.”
You shoved at his chest and he didn’t even have the energy to step back simply to make you feel better. He didn’t move an inch because you shoving him was like a cat trying to push a lion. “You are such a fucking mommy’s boy! I’m done with this whole thing, I’m done with you!”
“No, you’re not!”
“Yes, I am! You can’t make me stay here, you can’t make me—”
“You love me!”
Your eyes widened. He made you tell him you loved him, never said it back, and now he was using it against you? “You are dead! Do you understand me?! I’m going to run you over with your fucking Beemer! Then I’m going to get a new boyfriend and I’m going to let him fuck me in that stupid fucking car!”
He grabbed a handful of your hair and your hands flew back to scratch at his forearm. He shoved you back onto the bed and made the mistake of rolling over to attempt to get away from him. He grabbed both of your wrists and managed to get them into one of his hands, then yanked down your yoga pants.
“You are tearing them, you ass!”
And then he smacked your bare skin hard enough that it echoed, loud enough that you were sure anyone in the kitchen could have heard it. Your entire body burned with humiliation, but you loved the pain. How had you survived so long without him doing this?
“Shut the fuck up,” he ordered.
“Are you seriously trying to fuck me in your parents’ room?” you snapped.
“No, I am going to fuck you in my parents’ room,” he corrected. “What? You’re not into this anymore? This wouldn’t be the first time.”
“They sleep here,” you reminded. “This is weird given your obsession with her.”
“I changed the sheets this morning.”
“Are you fucking serious? You’re her maid now?”
He smacked you again and you pressed your face down to muffle your scream. “No, I just always knew that I was going to fuck you here today.”
You waited until the pain subsided before you turned your face, Ransom was still working the yoga pants down, a task that seemed impossible with only one hand. “Where were you today?”
“I had a meeting.”
“With whom?”
“None of your business.”
“Yes, it is my business, you fucking dick! If you’re not going to let me go home—”
He spanked you again, harder now, it seemed like an angry action, not just a retaliating one. “You are home, this is your fucking home and if you suggest otherwise again, I fucking swear—”
“What?” you demanded. “You’re going to tattle to your mommy?”
“I should fucking strangle you,” he growled, and before you could say anything, his hand was at your pussy. He scoffed. “You are seriously this wet? You have so many fucking issues.”
“One issue,” you argued. “You.” But that was a lie and he was more than right. You could hear him moving his pants out of his way and you were nearly shaking with the need to feel him.
Abruptly, he shoved his cock inside you and you both moaned as you adjusted around him. It was loud, obscenely loud, there was no question about what you two were doing, and you honestly didn’t care anymore. Had he gotten bigger? No, that wasn’t possible. You were pretty sure it wasn’t.
You felt him moving to tear off his coat. “Don’t you dare throw that coat on this floor, Ransom.”
But he did and he did it so eagerly, like he wanted to irritate you. The floors were hardwood, Linda had her dogs in the home, and their fur got everywhere on Ransom’s clothes. He hated you, you hated it because he just threw things away—didn’t even donate them because he’s such a beast.
Next, you felt his scarf around your wrists and started struggling.
“What the fuck are you doing?!”
“Shut up,” he snarled.  “You’re lucky I’m not fucking gagging you.”
As his hips began rocking just slightly, he grabbed your jaw and turned your head back. His lips found yours immediately and while you two were sharing a sloppy, unskilled kiss, he began driving his hips into you as hard as he knew you needed him to.
His skin was slapping against yours noisily, the bed was creaking, moving on those extra hard thrusts. He spread your legs out as wide as he could and held them there, fingers digging painfully into your skin.
Things became very clear to Ransom at that moment. You were underneath him, completely at his mercy since you were bound now. You were pouting, pretending that you didn’t like this, and he wanted to fuck that disobedience out of you. He sat back up, holding your hips as he kept steadily moving in and out of you. “I’m going to fuck your ass.”
You blinked once, twice. “What?”
He never pulled out, but he did lean over and start yanking on the drawers of one of the bedside tables.
“What are you doing?” No, he wasn’t going to actually…fuck you there. He’d never done it, he’d never even asked about it even though you brought it up a few times. He’d located your plugs that one time, he knew you were into it. But nothing. Why now?
“I know he has to have something,” he insisted.
“I don’t want to think about your parents like that.”
“Oh, no, just think of my dad like that,” he joked.
You shook your head. “Eww.”
“Oh, eww?” he checked. “Since when? You realize you can never talk about fucking him again, right? Looks like you’re going to have to provoke me in other ways now.”
“I didn’t mean ‘eww’ like that,” you claimed, “I meant ‘eww’ that your mom isn’t fucking him, and I definitely should be, because he totally deserves it for being such a great husband and father, but sadly, I’m here with you instead.”
“You’re such a fucking brat and—got it.” Ransom rarely moved fast, preferring to act like the cocky ass that he was, making it clear that he had all the time in the world to do whatever the hell he wanted. Because you were never going to say no. But now, he was acting like he was in a race.
Your body tensed up as soon as you felt the sharp cold against your skin. Ransom took his fingers and spread the gel over your skin, you gasped when you felt one of his fingers teasing your hole.
He did this a few more times, just making sure that you were properly prepped before his first finger dipped inside you. He set his free hand to your back when you tensed. “Relax,” he ordered. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” you assured. You’d done this in the past, liked it, but it had been a long time since.
He started pumping his finger in and out and you began to squirm. You were trying to stay still and quiet, trying to hide how good he was making you feel, but he knew. When you pressed your hips back, he added his second finger and you winced.
His fingers already had you feeling so full. That was what you loved most about being with Ransom, you felt almost incomplete whenever he wasn’t in you. Your body was made to take his, to mold to him completely.
“Here’s how this is gonna go, baby,” he began. “You’re going to start sleeping in our bedroom again. Because I am the only man on this planet who can touch you like this and you’re going to stop being such a brat and taking that for granted.”
You scoffed. You were taking him for granted? Of course, every day you didn’t wake up on your knees for him was probably ‘taking him for granted’.
“Yes?”
You nodded, cheek pressed to the mattress. You didn’t care about winning anymore, you needed to be fucked. You lifted your head to look back at him. “Yeah.”
He pushed his third finger as slowly as he could.
You kept your attention on him, watching as his fingers disappeared inside your ass. As he moved his fingers back and forth, he started to tilt his hips. You were hyperaware of everything, you knew where his cock and fingers were, the wall between your two entrances was thin enough that you could feel it all.
He always thought of you as an insatiable, greedy little thing but even he was surprised when you said you wanted more. You wanted his cock, not his fingers, and he figured you were ready for it because you were soaking his length and the sheets.
As he positioned himself over you again, he pulled his cock out of your pussy and you whimpered. He brought his cock up and spread the fingers inside your asshole to open you up for him. You had never experienced Ransom gentler than when he pressed just the tip of his cock into you. You observed in awe, mouth dropped, panting, desperate, soaking. You knew when you were going to feel him, but you were not prepared at all. His cock was bigger than any plug you had used and you were aching.
He groaned when his fingers were out and all that he could feel was you squeezing the hell out of him. “Fuck. Think you can get on your knees for me?”
You nodded but made no moves to do so. He did instead, lifting your hips, and then grabbing your upper arms to keep you there. You pressed your hips down, swallowing more of his cock, whining and moaning at the painful stretch of him.
“Fuck yourself,” he told you.
You were shuddering, body screaming at the uncomfortable angles you were moving. You pushed your hips up until you felt the head of his cock and settled back down until it felt like it was too much, over and over until he knew that your muscles weren’t capable of continuing.
“Almost there,” he promised, lips at your ear. “Almost taking all of my cock, baby.” He let his hands slide down a little, toward your elbows for leverage, and then he started thrusting. He was careful not to go too deep, listening to the sounds you made because words were not your strong point when he was inside you.
You leaned over a bit, unable to hold yourself up completely. You were hovering over the pillows, his hold on you tight enough that you weren’t worried about falling forward. You were practically choking on a scream when one of his hands moved around you to your clit, immediately feeling lightheaded.
You folded over more and Ransom released your arm to grab your hair. Since you weren’t strong enough to hold yourself up completely, he was yanking on the roots of your hair. Your thighs were quivering because you were using them as your only source of balance, and all of that distracted from the painful stretch of his cock driving into you more and more each time.
Your pleasure was slowly climbing. By the time you were coming, your pussy was dripping onto the sheets, you were sweating, shuddering, gasping for air that you couldn’t seem to get enough of.
And he was only halfway inside you. He shoved two fingers into your cunt and used his grip on your hair to shove your face down on the mattress. All his weight pressed down on you until you were flat on the bed, trapping his arm between you and the mattress.
He left you with some space to work, you rode out your high by fucking yourself on his cock and fingers. You were drowning in the sensations, overwhelmingly full of a man that you knew would eventually drive you crazy.
When your body fell limp, he released your hair and grabbed your hip, guiding you to another devastating orgasm. “You still doing okay, baby?”
For a moment, you could only respond with a moan. His thumb brushed over your clit and you gasped. “Daddy, please, please, please—!”
“You think you deserve it, baby?”
“Please make me come,” you begged.
He waited until you were finishing around his fingers and finally, shoved his cock in completely.
You buried your face in the bed, screaming, sobbing, crying his name. He brought his hand from your hip to your hair, petting and shushing you, and that was all you ever needed from Ransom.
He gave you only seconds before his hips were rolling, his fingers pumping in and out of you, thumb rubbing your clit. He paid no mind to you, he simply used your body, no matter how much you were shuddering and shaking from the aftershocks of your orgasm.
It was almost immediate that he pulled out after he finished and climbed off the bed to pull you with him. Your legs were shaking, but he held you tight to keep you up. He turned your back to him so he could watch his cum drip out of your ass.
When he turned you back to him, he gathered his cum from the inside of your thighs and ran his hand across your mouth. Fucked out, covered in him, you never looked more beautiful.
“This is your home,” he told you. “If you say it isn’t again, you won’t be able to walk for a very long time. Understood?”
You shrugged. “I’m not sure I’m convinced yet.”
Ransom tossed you onto the bed like you weighed nothing and went to the door just to lock it. Was it weird that you thought you might get something out of Linda pounding on the door while her son was absolutely pounding you?
May: the anniversary,
It was Linda and Richard’s anniversary and that meant that everyone living in the house had to celebrate because the Thrombeys were starting to face withdrawals from not receiving enough attention from others.
Joni and Walt had decided to cook dinner that night and it surprisingly did not end in disaster. There were some presents, the family was trying their hand at online shopping and as the days ticked by, more and more packages were showing up every day.
The night was ending with a game of charades, something you and Ransom elected not to take part in beyond watching. The first team was Meg, Walt, and Richard. The second team was Joni, Linda, and Donna, and Jacob was the referee. They needed one, every single game because they were oddly competitive and whenever things got too aggressive, they were given a card, from green to red. Red meant disqualification, you’d only seen it happen twice in all these years, but it was great when it did happen.
You couldn’t help but watch Richard and Linda. They’d been married for so long now, so you didn’t understand why Richard had had his affair when he did. She wasn’t overly young, she had no money, it just didn’t make much sense to you.
You were on Ransom’s lap in the chair in the corner of the room. He had been drinking all night, so you chose not to. You guys were a better team when you were coordinating like that. He was always weird about his parents, you figured that was why he’d been off all day.
“Do you think you could ever forgive someone if they cheated on you?” he asked.
You turned to him, eyebrow arched. “I would murder you.”
He scoffed. “Come on, be serious.”
“I am being serious, Ransom.”
“If I were going to cheat on you, I would have already done it. I meant in a general sense.”
“I don’t think you love someone if you cheat on them,” you reasoned. “So, would I forgive? Maybe, I guess, whatever that even means. But would I stay? Hell no.”
“Right?”
“You talking about your parents?”
“It’s so weird, isn’t it? I mean, not really. Men are men and don’t they all eventually cheat?”
“You are playing with fire having this conversation with me.”
He scoffed. “I just don’t get it, why would she stay?”
“I don’t know,” you admitted. “It seems like you all have your, like, comfortable environments. You don’t really want to leave them…at least she gave him that killer black eye.”
“Yeah,” he recalled with a small smile. “But…I don’t know, I don’t completely blame him, either.”
“Ransom,” you warned.
“No, I’m not saying it’s my mom’s fault, but…she doesn’t exactly love him either. Maybe he thought she used to.”
“Maybe she did.”
“Yeah, maybe…I don’t know, if you’re blackmailing someone essentially—”
“She’s not blackmailing him.”
“He has no money,” he insisted. “He’s terrified. She holds it over him constantly.”
“Ransom, right now, choose. Me or money?”
He turned to you. “No hesitation, I would choose you.”
You were almost surprised to hear that, you thought…you had always thought you were Ransom’s second love, honestly.
“What? Were you expecting something else?”
“I don’t know.” You didn’t want to make him think you thought so low of him. It was a pretty vile accusation.
“You do, that’s fine…because I do believe that if we didn’t have money, it would tear us apart.”
“No, it wouldn’t,” you argued.
He arched an eyebrow at you. “You love your diamonds and this house. And I like spoiling the hell out of you… I know those are simple things, but to have to work for things? We couldn’t make it.”
“Well, he obviously wasn’t that scared, or he wouldn’t have cheated. That was my point. You’re acting like money is the most important thing, if it was, he wouldn’t have risked it.”
“True. I don’t know if I would be able to deal with it.”
You wrapped your arms around his neck and laid your cheek against his. “Ransom, baby, you’re jealous of inanimate objects and you once fucked me every day for a week and didn’t let me come because you thought I was talking to my ex.”
“It depends how it started, that’s all I’m saying. People aren’t perfect, you know.”
“I am,” you declared.
He scoffed. “You let me fuck you while you were dating that ex.”
“You coerced me,” you argued. “I was innocently in my own room and you just showed up—”
“So, you’re saying I seduced you?”
You rolled your eyes. “Can we go to bed? I don’t think there are going to be any fistfights tonight.”
“I’m sorry, baby, I know you were looking forward to that.”
“A bit,” you admitted.
“I’ll tell you about the time my mom tackled Joni at my high school graduation.”
You gasped. “I love when you tell me stories.”
Ultimately, things had gone back to normal with you and Ransom. He was sleeping with you more nights than not, he was in his office much less, things seemed to be in a much better place.
June: the affair,
Until June rolled around.
Then all his office shit started up again, the late nights, the insane number of hours. You tried to be understanding, but then he was abandoning you at family dinners and there was the time some moron rear-ended you and you had to call Walt because Joni and Meg weren’t picking up their phones because it was five in the morning, and Ransom wasn’t either because Ransom wasn’t a reliable boyfriend.
He had been apologetic, and you were just relieved that it had been an overall easy situation, so you didn’t hold it against him. Not until you had to borrow his phone to call yours because you had once again misplaced it. You were, once upon a time, a very organized, together person. Then the Thrombeys moved into your home.
You saw dating apps. Dating apps! On his fucking phone. You had no idea how to react, so you just didn’t. You made the mistake of letting everything grow, everything just pile on top of one another until you were at your breaking point.
Linda liked to poke at you and normally, she couldn’t. Because normally, Ransom was around. Because Ransom knew how his mother was and he knew how you were, and he just didn’t want anyone to end up dead.
That changed one morning when you were making pancakes and she came in for her early morning coffee. She asked where Ransom was and that was really the start of it because she did know. She found it hilarious that Ransom had his own office and never let anyone else in. She hated that she wasn’t allowed in but was placated that you weren’t either.
But you told her where he was anyway because you were attempting to be civil. She pointed out how much time he was spending in his office and you pretended it was common, she then asserted that that was how Richard was behaving during his affair.
And honestly, why hadn’t you thought of it before? He had to be having an affair, you always heard him typing in his office. He was clearly on some website, probably some BDSM chatroom, and you were going to fucking kill him.
It all made sense now, last month when he’d asked you if you would forgive cheating. That was just Ransom being Ransom, he was trying to guess your reaction if you ever found out. Well, you hadn’t been exaggerating, you would kill him.
You stormed up to the office and started pounding on the door. The rest of the family was going to hear you, but they were smart enough to know they better just mind their own business in their rooms.
“Ransom!” you yelled after minutes of no answer. Again, you were met with silence and that was when your irritation became fury. “Ransom, I will kick this fucking door down! You know these doors are old and weak and I can do it!”
Long story short, the doors were stronger than you thought, and you could not do it. The low point of your life was probably having to crawl to Meg’s room and ask her to call their super-expensive home doctor because you had done something terrible to your foot.
Ransom showed up three hours later after you had been all wrapped up and the family was fawning over you. You were being forced to sit on the couch and they would not stop asking you if they could get things for you. You were already wearing three different crystals, Walt had made you hot chocolate, and Jacob was checking his horror movie collection for your favorites.
“What the hell happened?” Ransom demanded.
You glared at him. “Where were you?”
“I was out for a walk.”
“And you didn’t take your phone?” Richard pressed. “We were calling you non-stop.”
“I left it up in my office,” he informed, moving to your side. “Are you okay? What happened?”
“She tried to kick down your office door,” Linda answered.
Ransom gave you an incredulous look. “I’m sorry?”
“You should be,” you retorted. You never argued in front of the family because you and Ransom were a team. Yes, you fought, but you never wanted to give the family insight on the cracks in your relationship because you knew they would exploit them.
“Enough,” Meg cut in. “No arguing, Dr. Fields told her to take it easy.”
“You had to call the doctor?” he questioned. “What did you do?”
“Fracture,” Linda informed, “Not that big of a deal. Please, continue arguing.”
Everyone else glared at her while you and Ransom glared at one another. It was then that Jacob reappeared with one of the Saw movies. Typically.
August: the book,
You had taken to sleeping in Meg’s room with her because Ransom was a demon, but he wouldn’t try to enter her room. Ever. So, you comfortably stashed yourself away there every night and stayed there most mornings until noon. She didn’t mind. You’d gotten her a tv in there, so you watched Netflix a lot.
You had yet to confront Ransom with your accusations because you were scared. This family was obscene, being part of it was insane, every single person here was terrible in their own right. But you liked talking to Meg, you liked gardening with Joni, you liked reading the newspaper with Walt in the mornings and talking about the crime section. Even Jacob wasn’t the worst company, he liked to watch Dateline with you.
Ransom was convinced that you were just mad at him because you fractured your toes and couldn’t do yoga for a while. You were fine with him believing that because then you would have to have the conversation.
It was an odd situation to be in. You were sure he hadn’t physically done anything, but you weren’t sure if that should make you feel better or worse. He was connecting with someone and after your conversation, it was clear that he also believed you couldn’t cheat on someone you love. Given that he’d never said he loved you, you were rightfully concerned.
Did he ever love you?
Did you just spend almost 7 years with someone who was never going to feel that way about you? Did you throw away all those opportunities with someone else? Did you stupidly choose Ransom over your family?
Did you let this happen?
You had said you couldn’t forgive it, but now you understood why Linda did. If you love someone, you just don’t want to lose them. You hope that they don’t betray you, but what about when they do? It’s not easy to just leave.
You still loved Ransom, you always would. You didn’t want to lose any of the relationships you formed with the family, but it was different with Ransom. You didn’t want to, obviously, but you also couldn’t. You couldn’t imagine a life without him, you couldn’t imagine moving on, you couldn’t imagine being with someone else.
What did that mean?
You weren’t sure about the long-term answer, but short-term, it meant that you were going to pretend. He wasn’t cheating, he didn’t have dating apps on his phone, he didn’t even have an office as far as you were concerned.
Nothing. Everything was perfect.
Until Jacob’s birthday. You weren’t aware of it before, but unsurprisingly, he was a fucking Leo. You made a mental note to investigate the astrology of certain serial killers Jacob reminded you of, but you would do that with Meg later.
You were helping Walt and Joni cook this time. Apparently, they were the only Thrombeys that knew how to cook and were pleased to have another addition to the small team. It wasn’t a particularly difficult meal, lasagna with garlic bread, but it was Jacob’s favorite.
The plans had been made the week prior, Ransom was going to do one thing for you. Just one, you asked for so little. He would pick up the cake at noon and hide it in the second kitchen. Hide because Jacob wasn’t aware this was happening. He didn’t like to be the center of attention and if he knew this was happening before it was actually happening, he would do anything he could to stop it.
But come 2 PM, three hours after the cake was set to be picked up, you received a call from the bakery. You had let them know that your boyfriend was going to pick it up and you left his name with them and everything, all Ransom needed to do was show up.
The woman on the phone informed you that that didn’t happen, and they were about to close because of pandemic hours. You promised you would be in before she needed to shut the doors and since you were comfortable with your window of time, this was done. Over. First, you were going to yell at Ransom.
You quietly made your way to his office and listened with your ear pressed to the door. You didn’t make a sound until you heard him typing, then you started banging on the door with both hands.
It was seconds later that he answered the door, a confused look on his face over your apparent urgency. He looked like he’d pulled an all-nighter and smelled like a lot of alcohol. “What?”
“What the fuck, Ransom?”
“What? What do you need?”
You tried to open the door, but he held it in place.
“What the hell are you doing?”
You were getting into that office because you were going to find out what he was doing, he was not going to continue to lie to you. You kicked his shin and when his leg buckled, you shoved your way in.
“Hey!” He hurriedly shut the door behind you. He did not want anyone else getting in.
It looked like a normal office. There was a full bookshelf of titles that you couldn’t read because your anger was blurring your vision, there was a desk, a laptop, chairs, a bar cart, not a thing out of the ordinary. What the fuck was he doing in here all day?
There was only one logical answer. You finally turned to him, hands on your hips. “Who is she, Ransom?”
“What?”
“I know you’ve been cheating on me and I’m not going to play this game with you! I just want to know who the fuck she is!”
“Are you out of your mind?!”
“Yes, I’m out of my fucking mind! I’ve been living with your psychotic family since March, dealing with their shit on top of yours, and you are now cheating on me! Please explain to me how anyone else wouldn’t also be out of their mind!”
“I’m not cheating on you!”
“Really?! Then what the fuck are you always doing up here?”
He paused at that.
The camel’s back broke. This was officially over. You turned around and rushed to his computer. He only took a second before he realized what you were doing and followed you there.
“I swear to everything above, if you are in some pathetic chatroom—”
He leaned over you just as you reached for the laptop and slammed it shut. “I’m not cheating on you!”
“Then let me see your fucking laptop!” You didn’t care that he had his hands planted on it, you still grabbed the opposite ends and tried to pull it out from under him. It wasn’t a logical plan since he was much stronger than you, but you weren’t necessarily operating on logic.
“You are crazy,” he asserted.
You moved your hands to the top edge of the laptop and threw your entire body back into Ransom. More than anything, it probably shocked him into moving back. Had you known that it was going to work, you probably would have been better about keeping your footing. Since that wasn’t the case, you both ended up on the floor and for a split second, the laptop was only in your hands.
You dove forward, just inches from the door.
Ransom rushed after you, grabbing your leg to pull you back down.
You knew he was going to get you under him, you wrapped your arms tight around the laptop and started screaming. Joni or Richard might feel inclined to call the police if they thought the two of you were honestly fighting.
Ransom slammed his hand down on your mouth as he crawled over you, knees pressed to your hips to keep you pinned there. “What the hell is wrong with you!?”
You didn’t say a word and you didn’t let your hold on the laptop waver for even a second.
“If I move my hand, you better not scream again,” he warned.
Obviously, you were going to. As soon you could, you yelled, “Call the police, he’s going to kill—!”
Ransom covered your mouth again, eyes wide at you. “You have lost it!”
It was then that you realized you needed to do something. He had the upper hand, and he was going to get the laptop away from you if you did nothing. You started swiping at him with both elbows and knees, never catching anything, but making him nervous enough to back off a little.
Fuck it, he was done trying to be reasonable with you. He moved his hand again, but only to start fighting with you over the laptop again.
“Let it go!” you shrieked.
“You let it go!” he countered. “It’s mine!”
“Not anymore, cheater!”
“I’m not fucking cheating on you!”
“If you have some online BDSM girlfriend, I’m going to fucking kill you!”
“What? What the hell goes through your mind!?”
“You’re constantly in here and you won’t let me in, and you never tell me what you’re doing, you never tell anyone else either—”
“Because I hate my family,” he reminded.
“And clearly, you hate me!”
“I don’t hate you, you’re being childish.”
“Tell me her name, Ransom, or so help me—”
“I’m not cheating!”
“I saw the dating apps on your god damn phone!”
“I am not cheating!”
“Then what are you doing?!”
“I’m writing a book!” he hissed.
You froze. He was what?
He kept his voice quiet, “That’s where I was a couple months ago, the meeting that I told you was none of your business. I only had a few chapters, but I got a deal out of it—”
“Get off me.”
He blinked in surprise and then hurried to do so, helping you up, no longer interested in stealing away the laptop.
You held onto it because you weren’t yet sure if you were going to use it to cause severe bodily harm to him. He was writing a book and didn’t tell you? You didn’t know he was interested in writing at all. You didn’t know he could sit down and write more than one entire sentence. He was always moving around, throwing himself into mindless activities.
A book?
You were hurt. Getting a book deal was major and he didn’t tell you he was trying for it, but then he didn’t even tell you that he’d gotten it. He had this huge thing in his life that he kept separate from you and that hurt your feelings.
“That’s was the apps were,” he explained. “I was doing research. Honestly, I’ll let you see the profiles, they’re not even pictures of me. I haven’t spoken to anyone either, it’s just very basic—”
You held the laptop out to him.
He slowly took it back from you, preparing for any other extreme reaction you might have. What he wasn’t expecting was complete silence, he figured you must have been confused by this. It was rather sudden, even for him. “You going to say something?”
You debated for a long while. You wanted to ask why he was pushing you away. You wanted to ask if it was because he didn’t think you were supportive, if he just didn’t want you to know, then you wanted to know why that was. What had you ever done that made him think he couldn’t tell you about this?
“I have to go get Jacob’s cake.”
“Shit!” He ran his hand down his face. “I completely forgot—”
“Don’t worry about it.” Then you were rushing out, ignoring the curious looks from the family on the way.
October: Ransom’s birthday,
It had been seven weeks since you found out about the book and seven weeks since you last had an actual conversation with Ransom. That was your doing purely, and he made the attempts, but you ignored them.
Linda was thrilled. This was different than when you and Ransom were fighting, because fighting indicated that you had the desire to win, he had the desire to win, but then that meant a resolution would follow. If you were ignoring him, what did you want? She hoped it was the end of the road for the two of you.
You weren’t sure. About anything. But you just had to go day by day and listen to yourself. Up to now, you weren’t sure what you wanted to do. As time went on and you were left to wallow in your hurt feelings, you were wondering if maybe this was the end.
Seven years and he didn’t tell you he was writing a book? That was insane, that was inexcusable. You didn’t get to have any part of your life not completely exposed to Ransom and you were okay with that. Obviously, he didn’t feel the same.
Seven years, a nearly dead modeling career, no skills, no aim in life. You had no idea how you would start all over. You had no idea how you would live your life without being Ransom’s girlfriend. It was practically a title, like the queen, and you loved it. You loved him.
But he didn’t tell you about the book! How could you get over that? Well, you could talk to him, but you were not going to do that. You just weren’t ready because you would want to know why and all the answers that were playing out in your mind were not going to make you feel better.
It didn’t matter, or more correctly, it couldn’t matter. Ransom’s birthday was coming up and Linda was trying to fight you on everything.
It was October, the worst of the pandemic was over, wasn’t it? No, you didn’t think so and anyone with two solid IQ points wouldn’t either. She wanted some family over, some of his friends—Megan, you had heard her mention to Richard. You didn’t want a single person in your house, no one outside of the family.
She suggested going to a restaurant then, but you knew Ransom hated when they threw him parties like that.
She wanted him to have a red velvet cake and you knew that Ransom hated red velvet. He preferred lemon, but he told you that you were never allowed to get him a lemon cake because he would eat it all. He was fine with chocolate, didn’t hate it, didn’t love it.
If you weren’t going out, then she wanted catering from his favorite restaurant, and a minimum of 30 people over, the house was big enough for it. It wasn’t even his favorite restaurant, the one she wouldn’t stop talking about, you knew for a fact Ransom did not like 30 people, and the house was not big enough for it.
On top of all of that, she kept asking you what you were going to get him. She just didn’t want to get the same thing. Why would that happen? Why would she get him the same thing as you? You had no idea, but she insisted on knowing. Problem was, you didn’t have an answer to give her. You had no idea what you were going to get Ransom.
Three days before his birthday, Ransom found you on the floor of the kitchen with an icepack pressed to your forehead. It was three in the morning, you had most of the lights off, only your phone and laptop providing light. Even in the dim kitchen, he could tell that you had been crying, eyes puffy and red, tear tracks down your cheeks.
He had been in his office, more writing. He’d only come down for a glass of water, sure that no one else would be awake at such an odd hour. This was the first time in a long time that he had seen you alone, and this naked. Usually, you were surrounded by the family, Joni being the greatest culprit. And since you still weren’t sleeping in the bedroom, he hadn’t seen you in your tiny shorts and bralettes.
He sat down at your side, setting his hand on your thigh. “Hey, is everything okay?”
You tossed the icepack onto the floor. “I never got stress headaches before your family moved in.”
“Yeah, I noticed that.”
It was silent for several moments after that, you were thinking about how you wanted to approach this topic. It was clear now, in your mind, why he hadn’t told you about the book. “I never listen to you.”
He turned to you, eyebrows pulled together. “What?”
You were already crying again, tears rolling down your face. You had felt terrible these past few weeks and you were finally beginning to understand why. “I don’t listen, I’m a terrible listener.”
“No,” he protested. “You’re not a terrible listener—”
“I have no idea what to get you for your birthday. I never know, I never get you a good present.”
“Yes, you do,” he argued. “And you don’t need to get me anything—”
“Of course, I do!” you blurted out. Was he insane? This was his birthday, you couldn’t not get him something for his birthday. “This is why you didn’t tell me about the book, right?”
His eyebrows shot up. “What?”
“Because I don’t listen,” you explained. “Why would you tell me about it if I wasn’t even going to listen, right?”
“Baby,” he sighed, “That’s not why I didn’t tell you. I wasn’t trying to keep it from you, honestly—”
“You didn’t tell me you were writing, you didn’t tell me you were trying to get published, and then you didn’t tell me about the book deal.”
“I know…I was going to.”
“But?” you prompted. “How could you not tell me about any of it?”
“I was worried.”
“Why?”
“Because of fucking Harlan. He’s the world’s best mystery author, for whatever fucking reason. I was worried that you wouldn’t think I should do this. I was worried about how it would look. I don’t want to follow in my grandfather’s footsteps like the rest of my pathetic family.”
“So, were you just never going to say anything about it?”
“Well…maybe. There’s something else… I wasn’t sure I was going to use my name, so it was completely possible that I could keep you from ever finding out about them. And if you ever got suspicious, maybe publish a few of the others under my real name.”
“Others? What are you talking about?”
“So…my book deal is for, at the very least, three books. In a series. If they do well, I can do others, with the possibility of keeping this series going…whenever I feel inspired to do so.”
“Okay…what’s the series about?”
“A woman.”
You narrowed your eyes.
“A very mean woman,” he clarified. “She’s a black widow, you know, marries rich men, murders them, takes the money…and I’ve sort of been using your name.”
Your eyebrows slowly rose. “You’ve been writing about me?”
“No,” he immediately protested, then sighed. “Okay, a little, but she’s beautiful. I mention that a lot, I promise.”
Yes, you were relieved. But was he completely off the hook? You slapped his shoulder. “Are you serious?”
“Hey,” he held his hand to the skin that you had just smacked. “Ow, maybe don’t hit me just days away from my birthday if you didn’t get me anything.”
“God, Ransom, I was really hurt.”
“I’m sorry about that. Really, I know I rarely ever apologize and sometimes, I don’t mean it, but I mean it now.”
“Well, can I read some of it?”
He smirked. “I don’t know, baby girl, you haven’t been behaving lately. You tried to break into my office, hurt yourself, and then did break into my office to steal my laptop. You thought I was cheating on you.”
“I saw dating apps, Ransom.”
“After we talked about my parents—”
“You lock yourself in your office for, like, 20 hours at a time—”
“And some BDSM chatroom? Because you’re normal in bed?”
You rolled your eyes. “Look, I’m sorry for accusing you of cheating, but you should have told me about the book. Which you apologized for, so it just cancels out. Let’s do what we usually do and just pretend it never happened.”
“You told Joni to call the cops,” he reminded.
You shrugged. “I miss Wagner, he probably would have been over here immediately.”
He snorted. “Okay, we both made mistakes, but you’re right.”
With his agreement to move on, you climbed onto his lap and wrapped your arms around his neck. “Please?”
“I’m not completely convinced yet,” he teased.
Rolling your eyes, you kissed him. “Now?”
“You’re getting closer.”
You scoffed and kissed him again, reaching into his sweatpants to pull out his cock. It didn’t take long to get him hard and as soon as you did, you used your other hand to pull your shorts aside. You broke away from the kiss to watch his face as you slowly slid down his length.
His hands gripped your hips and he nodded. “Yeah, you can have whatever you want.”
You smiled. “Perfect, let’s get it now.”
He snorted. “Wow, now you’re a fucking comedian?”
“Well, you’re an author,” you retorted.
He nodded once. “You have a point. I vaguely remember what I wrote, want me to tell you?”
You nodded. You wanted to hear it in his voice, you were going to demand that he read it to you anyway.
“Her first husband was a writer,” he informed.
You lifted your eyebrows. Was that supposed to be clever?
“He often wrote poetry about how devastatingly beautiful he found her.”
You rolled your eyes a little, turning down to stare at his chest. He was wearing a shirt, but you could still see the muscles through the white material. “How did she kill him?”
“Scared him to death, she is very scary.”
You bit your cheek to prevent a smile.
“His fault, though. He was never healthy, did a few drugs he shouldn’t have. Drank too much, never ate right. He had a weak heart anyway.”
You hummed.
He wrapped his arm around your back and rolled you over onto the floor underneath him. He pulled your thighs apart before placing both hands on the floor for balance. Slowly, he pulled out and drove back in hard.
You gasped his name, arms winding tightly around his torso.
“He loves her skin,” he asserted.
You nodded encouragingly, you wanted him to tell you everything. “Mhm.”
“Loves how soft she is, especially her thighs, and he loves how she bruises.” He was steadily rocking his hips, speaking just loud enough that you could hear him over the wet noises of his cock sliding in and out of your body, but quiet enough that you were sure no one else would hear.
You reminded yourself you were downstairs, on the kitchen floor, it was important to remain quiet. Ransom’s family had caught you in a lot of low moments over the years, but this would take the cake. You turned your head, burying your face in the bend of his neck.
“He loves her neck, how perfectly it fits in his hands. He loves her lips, how they look wrapped around him, or when she’s smiling—”
“You wrote that?” you breathed.
“This isn’t some school-book-report shit like what Harlan was publishing.”
“Those weren’t children’s books,” you felt inclined to point out.
“Well, mine have sex.”
You snorted. “You’re going to write about other men fucking me?”
“A woman here and there,” he explained. “That’s why they have to die such horrible deaths.”
You laughed briefly, pressing your mouth to his shoulder when you worried you would moan.
“He loves her legs, how tightly they wrap around him.” As he spoke, he lifted your legs one at a time, pressing them to the sides of his body as a cue to hook your ankles together. “He loves her arms, how easily he can pin them above her head.” Again, he did just that and you were forced to lay flat on the floor, clamping your mouth shut to stifle the noises spilling out.
After managing to get both wrists in one hand, he placed his opposite forearm off to your side and set all his weight there. You could feel it in the way he got heavier against your hips, trapping you between him and the floor, controlling every aspect of how he was going to make you come.
He stared down at your face for a moment, watching you struggle to keep your composure as he was fucking into you harder now. He leaned down and your eyes fell shut, he kissed over both eyelids and said, “He loves her eyes, even when she’s looking up at him, demanding something, a new diamond necklace, a car, but won’t actually say the words because she’s so fucking spoiled.”
You smirked and he felt it, and his hips snapped up harshly to get it to stop. It only worked for a moment. You were smug, Ransom was pouring his heart out to you and confessed that he liked that you were spoiled? You would never let him live this down.
“He loves her cheeks,” he started kissing across your face and you couldn’t help but smile, “Especially when she’s doing that.” He stopped to pay special attention to your nose, “And he loves her nose, even though she hates it. And he loves when she pouts,” he lowered his mouth to give you several chaste pecks, until you were pouting because he wouldn’t just kiss you.
With a scoff, he finally let you kiss him back. It didn’t last long before he was on the move again, pressing his lips to your chin and proclaiming the fictional character’s love of that, then your jaw, your clavicle, and once he tore your bralette out of the way, your breasts.
As he continued to move down, he was sliding his cock out by the inch and you were trying to stop him from getting too far, you were desperately pulling at him with your legs, but Ransom was much stronger than you.
“He loves her stomach,” he muttered into your skin as he descended and finally, his cock slipped out. Because of that, he had to let your wrists go but you knew better than to try to move them.
“Ransom, please—”
“And he loves her hips.” As he pulled down your shorts, he kissed the skin he exposed, almost frantically alternating between left and right. Once the shorts were down, he spread your thighs and looked up at you. “And he fucking loves her pussy.”
You let out a strangled, high-pitched sound as he dove down and wrapped his lips around your clit. He stared at you the entire time as he sucked for a few seconds, then flicked his tongue back and forth, only to repeat the pattern until you were crying and squirming, staying in the position he had placed you in.
When he knew you were close, he pulled back. He only set small kisses to your aching center, hands moving up and down your hips, your stomach, your thighs. “He loves how sweet it tastes, he loves how fucking tight it is, how it feels like his cock was made to be inside it—”
“Ransom, please,” you blurted out. Your arms were stinging with the desire to reach down for him, but you knew that would change the path of this entire night. You just needed to be fucked. Simply. Intimately. None of the elaborate shit you both usually tried.
In seconds, he had made his way over you and was inside you again. You wrapped yourself around him, arms and legs, and held onto him tight enough that you were sure he wouldn’t be able to get away again.
“He loves every fucking inch of her,” he stated. “Because she’s his, she belongs to him and she’s never going to belong to anyone else.”
You scoffed. “But she kills him?”
“Well, she’s a complex woman.”
You rolled your eyes. “I’m not complex.”
He arched an eyebrow.
“I just want you and this house, and I want all of this shit to be over so we can get rid of your family.”
He kissed you shortly. “That makes two of us, baby.”
There was a difference between loving something about someone and truly being in love with someone. You’d always loved things about Ransom, but it took you about a solid year to confidently admit that you were in love with him. He could say that he loved everything about you, but that was not him finally saying it.
“Does she love him?” you wondered.
He shrugged a shoulder. “He thinks so.”
“Does he love her?” This wasn’t asking for too much. Ransom could hide behind this fictional creation of his and say yes, and you would never ask again. You just wanted to hear it once, that wasn’t unfair.
He considered his answer for a long time, breaking eye contact to look down at where his fingers were hovering over your shoulder. He began to trace shapes there, still contemplating. “Sometimes…she thinks so.”
“But does he?” you pressed.
Again, more silence. He was trying to gauge what he could get away with. He always knew this was going to wear on you eventually, but he never thought it was going to be during one of the times he was inside you. How could you not feel how he felt about you? “I think—”
“Are you fucking serious!?”
You immediately knew whose voice that was—Linda. Shutting your eyes, you let your head rest back on the floor. The headache you had been crying over earlier was returning.
“RICHARD!” She turned out of the kitchen and began storming back to her room. “Richard, wake up! You need to talk to your son! Is there no place in this house anymore that is sacred?!”
Ransom sighed deeply and you looked up at him. “Well, do you want to make you come first before we go upstairs?”
You shrugged. “Okay. Hurry up, we don’t have to be quiet anymore.”
November: thanksgiving,
Ransom was on his best behavior, you theorized that was because he didn’t want you to again ask him for more of that insane basic human emotion. Whatever, you could not dwell. There were people dying in this world, and you wanted to waste time crying over your boyfriend who gave you everything you wanted, but just wouldn’t say a certain word to you?
Well, the answer was yes, but it was Thanksgiving and the Thrombeys had about a million and one weird-ass family traditions. That meant you were short on time to be pouting.
It was a freezing, perfect day. It had snowed all night and the house looked like something straight out of a Hallmark movie. Yes, this was going to be a complicated day with a lot of personalities that were butting heads because everyone had been together for way too long, but you were feeling festive. You wanted to make the best of the day and you planned to force the rest of the family to follow your lead.
The start of the traditions was donating money. You were the one who brought it up as soon as Richard tried to skip down the list. It always started with donating. Harlan would write checks for half a million dollars and let every member choose where they wanted to donate, the past three years you were included in that. Harlan always liked you, probably more than he liked some of his actual family.
“I’m just not sure,” Donna was saying, “We haven’t made much money this year.”
“Are you kidding?” Meg demanded. “Your husband’s publishing company is still seeing sale increases.”
“Because of the death of the author,” Linda pointed out. “Meaning, we should be a lot more frugal. The money will not be coming in the same way that it was.”
“This is not up for debate,” you snapped. “Everyone pick a god damn charity. Harlan insisted on this every single year, and we are going to continue it. Unless you all would like to provoke his ghost to come murder us. He died in this house after all!”
“It’s money,” Ransom pointed out. “We have more than enough, some people don’t have any.”
Linda rolled her eyes. “My son is just trying to get you to have sex with him.”
You glared.
“Mother,” Ransom sighed. “This isn’t a discussion. Just pick your damn charity.”
“Donna, it’s fine,” Walt promised. “Meg’s right, we’ve had a great year. And Y/N is right, Dad always wanted us to do this. I will start with my usual charity, Homes for Our Troops.”
“Fantastic.” You took the check as soon as he handed it over. “Donna?”
“American Cancer Society, of course.” She held it out for you and then looked to Jacob. “I think this year—”
“I have a charity picked,” Jacob informed.
Everyone fell silent. Likely, everyone’s immediate suspicion was Trump’s request for donations since he was still insisting the election was fraudulent. However, no one said anything because no one wanted to be the first victim of Jacob’s impending murder spree.
“Can’t I pick my own?” he pressed.
“Yes,” you answered. “You can, because everyone can pick their own charity.”
“Yeah,” Walt echoed. “Of course.”
He wrote the name down and slid the check across the table to you.
Ransom’s hand tightened on your thigh, a reminder not to let anyone antagonize you this holiday.
“Canines for Disabled Kids,” you read. “Jacob, that’s really great…I didn’t even know that was a charity.”
He shrugged. “Yeah, well, I like the idea that they can have dogs as friends and don’t have to make human friends. Humans are so stupid.” Then he returned all his attention to his phone.
“And we’re back,” Richard muttered.
Donna’s head snapped in his direction.
“Okay,” you interjected. “Joni?”
She chose a foundation interested in ending childhood obesity, received a snide comment from Meg about how even her acts of kindness were vain, and you intervened before it became bigger than that. Meg chose an organization that works to stop childhood prostitution, Linda went for homeless youth, and Richard selected Make-A-Wish Foundation. Walt felt the need to sarcastically commend him for his originality.
“Enough,” you said before Richard could respond. “My dearest Ransom, what have you chosen?”
He smiled at you. “Animal Legal Defense Fund. Their tagline is: all our clients are innocent.”
You nodded. “They are. All animals are innocent.”
Linda rolled her eyes. “Can we move on?”
“Okay, mine is—”
“I can’t believe you don’t have a problem that she’s basically brainwashing our son,” Linda interrupted, turning to Richard.
“Linda, please,” Richard sighed.
“My charity,” you spoke loudly, gaining their attention once more, “Is Planned Parenthood.”
“Are you out of your mind?” she demanded. “You want to donate your money to abortions?”
You glared. “That’s not all Planned Parenthood does, but…yes, I do. Babies suck, if a woman doesn’t want to have it, she doesn’t have to.”
Joni nodded. “I agree, completely. I’ve been learning in my group about how we are only placed on this earth to offer up our vibrations to one another. Our obligations do not exceed that. We don’t have to be anything! Not a mother, not a wife—”
“Oh, shut up!” Linda barked.
“Mother, calm down,” Ransom dismissed. “I don’t believe for a second any of you have not either had an abortion or been an accessory to one in the past.”
“I would never!” she gasped, pointing a finger at him. “And you better not ever let her!”
“Yeah, don’t worry about that happening. I’ve been thinking about eliminating that possibility, surgically—”
Linda’s mouth dropped.
This was, of course, untrue. Ransom would, first, never sacrifice any part of himself for that reason. Second, the matter had not been discussed yet. You guys weren’t even thinking about marriage, so of course, children weren’t being brought up. But that morning, Ransom woke up in the mood for chaos, and maybe you sort of did, too.
“I wanted a second child,” she told Richard, “You said to stop after Ransom because he was “perfect”.”
“I did say that,” he muttered to himself, a look of pure regret on his face.
You smiled at Ransom. “You are perfect.”
He kissed you, gaining disapproving noises from most of the table.
“I will never be a grandmother!” Linda yelled, burying her hands in her hair and resting her shoulders on the table.
You glanced at Ransom.
He nodded toward the kitchen. “Now that that’s done, let’s start cooking.”
Tumblr media
Joni and Meg were currently searching the entire house for the Christmas decorations. They always ended up getting put in the strangest places and since you and Ransom had moved in and not known where they were, you moved basically everything. It was possible that you were going to have to make do with the decorations you and Ransom had been using for the past five years at his house.
You had, however, purchased a lot of lights because the Thrombeys loved their blue lights. Tacky, you wanted the yellow lights and made sure to buy enough that even a single blue light needed to be on that house. Ransom was excitedly awaiting his mother’s reaction to that.
Every year, Richard and Walt would put lights on the house while the dinner was cooking. Ransom should have helped but no one actually thought Ransom would lift a finger, so no one wasted their breath. He was only helping you cook because, as mentioned, he was pretending to be a good boyfriend.
But he was a monster, a true monster that was currently squashing even more of your dreams. “The answer isn’t just no, it’s fuck no.”
You glared. “I wasn’t asking for permission.”
“You asked if it was a good idea.”
“I think it is.”
“Then why did you ask me at all?”
“Because I thought you would be nice for a second, just a second, Ransom. I’m not asking for a lot.”
“We are not getting Jacob a dog.”
“Why not?”
“Because I hate dogs.”
“Well, I hate you,” you hissed.
He rolled his eyes. “Enough of the dramatics. This day is tiring enough already—”
“We’ll get him a small one, it doesn’t need to be those huge horses your mother calls dogs. A chihuahua, maybe. A Pomeranian, a dachshund—”
“Absolutely not, we already have Joni here, I don’t want some yappy animal—”
“Ransom!” you whined. “If we get him a dog, he might not become a serial killer.”
“He already is a serial killer, love, these are just the early years when he’s finding himself. The answer is still no.”
“Ugh, fine, can you just make the pie crusts, please?”
“How many?”
“Three.”
“Three? For what?”
“Pumpkin, apple, pecan, Ransom. The same things your family has served every single year I’ve been here, and presumably, all the ones before that.”
“Ugh.” He stood at the counter reading the recipe, muttering his disapproval, up until he saw the ingredients on the counter. “What is all of this?”
“Um, you know that recipe in your hand? The final product doesn’t just appear.”
“No, what is all of this…gluten-free flour, oat flour? Where’s the normal flour?”
“That is normal flour, Ransom.”
“No,” he argued. “No, it’s not.”
“It’s normal to some people,” you countered. “And this year, it’s normal to us. Joni went out and bought the groceries. If you wanted something, you could have done it yourself.”
“You wouldn’t let me leave the house! You kept saying I was going to get sick and die.”
“You could have ordered them!”
“You can’t be serious. On top of this dreadful year, you’re trying to make us eat healthy food on Thanksgiving?”
“Ransom, make the pie crusts!”
It was silent for several minutes, probably because you were using the mixer to make the pumpkin filling. As soon as it was off, Ransom was acting like you’d asked him to perform surgery.
“What does toss mean?”
“What?”
“It says to toss the ingredients.”
“Um, like, stir, I guess.”
“You guess or you know?”
“Just fucking stir, Ransom. I make pies all the time.”
He huffed. “No, oh, no. No, this is telling me to touch things with my hands, that’s disgusting and I’m not doing that.”
You turned back, eyes wide. “Ransom!”
“I’m not touching butter with my hands!”
“What is wrong with you!? It’s cooking, you have to use your hands to cook!”
“I don’t like touching butter!”
“How would you know? You’ve never cooked a day in your life!”
“I’m not touching it,” he claimed.
You took a slow breath in and released it while counting to ten. “Then switch with me and make the apple pie filling.”
“Great.” He walked to your counter as you walked to his. “What is this? What’s in this bowl?”
“The pumpkin pie filling. Cover it and put it in the refrigerator. That’s where the apples are.”
His next question came after he pulled out the bag of apples. “These?”
You turned back, blinking. “Yes, Ransom, those are apples.”
“I have to cut them?”
“And peel them.”
“That’s going to take forever.”
“Ransom, I’m about to smack you.”
“This is a lot!” he pointed out. “Why are we the only people cooking?”
“We’re not, not anymore,” you decided. “Get out, you can go help your father and Walt with the Christmas lights.”
“And you’re going to cook alone?”
“I basically already am.” You turned around to walk to the sink to wash your hands. Unlike Ransom, you weren’t making one pie crust at a time, and you would only need to do this once. When you turned around, you knew Ransom was behind you, but you had no idea what he was doing.
You only saw how close he was when you felt something wet and cold against the side of your face. Whatever it was, he dragged it all the way to the opposite cheek. You smelled and tasted the frosting that you had made for the sugar cookies.
He peeled the frosted star-shaped cookie off your skin and ate one of the corners. “Your blood-sugar seemed low, I thought I’d help.”
You tore the cookie out of his hand and shoved it directly in his face.
He scattered back, eyes wide in shock—as if he expected anything less? “What is wrong with you?!”
You grabbed the retractable faucet from the sink and turned the water on.
“Do not!”
It was a warning you ignored. Within seconds, he was slipping along the kitchen floor, rushing back to you to get the faucet out of your hands. As soon as he had it, he turned it on you, and you screamed like a cat about to be thrown in a bathtub.
“Stop it!” you ordered. “You are ruining Thanksgiving!”
“You’re ruining it!”
You elbowed him hard enough that he dropped the faucet, then kicked your heels off to run to the counter with the cookies and frosting.
“Don’t you dare!” He rushed after you and wrestled the cookie out of your hand, ultimately crushing it into crumbs that scattered all over the counter and the floor.
You shoved your opposite hand into one of the bowls of frosting, whipping around to place your hand on his face.
“What the fuck?!” But he leaned down, clearly uninterested in an answer, and pressed his face into your hair.
“My hair?!” you shrieked. “I’m going to kill you!”
There were several sets of steps that you both heard, but neither of you wanted to let the other get the upper hand. When the family finally found you, you had slipped, ended up on your ass, and Ransom was holding you down, claiming that you caused too many problems when you were on your feet.
“What the hell is going on?!” Joni questioned.
“Ransom, get off of her!” Meg pushed her way between the two of you, pulling you onto your feet. “Oh, my god, what is going on? Are you okay?”
Well, you were both soaking wet, layered in frosting, furiously trying to get another cookie to throw at the other. Were you okay? Only physically. Mentally, you weren’t sure either one of you was ever on solid ground there.
“Enough!” Linda yelled. “What is this insanity!? We need to be eating in less than an hour and as per usual, you two can’t go five minutes without fighting! That’s it, everyone get out of this kitchen! This is why I cook, this is why I do everything! I’m the only one that can!”
She turned away to open the door to usher everyone out and you took your chance to get some type of retaliation that you had been longing for since before the damn stay-at-home order.
You were able to reach for a cookie before either Meg or Ransom could stop you, and no one had ever dreamed your target would be Linda, so for a detrimental moment, their reactions were nonexistent. Essentially, everyone could only stare in pure horror as they realized the cookie was darting straight for the back of Linda’s head. Which, in your defense, wasn’t your exact intention. You thought her back, not her head…but well, there was a reason you weren’t a professional athlete.
Gasps filled the room as soon as the cookie contacted Linda’s head, then again when it fell to the floor. Linda slowly turned, eyes wide, jaw set, shoulders tense—that must be where Ransom got it.
“This is my house,” you reminded. “You do not get to order me out of my kitchen!”
She looked at Ransom, silently urging him to make his alliance known right then. Before he had to say anything, yelling sounded from outside the house. Walt and Richard had yet to finish the one job they had, everyone figured that was the cause of the disturbance.
Quickly, you all made your way out to the front of the house. Richard had his leg wrapped up in a mess of lights and was hanging from the edge of the house. The same vines of lights were also wound around Walt, who was hanging onto the house for dear life.
“Oh, my god!” Donna yelled. “Oh, my god!”
“Are you serious?” Linda demanded. “There is a pandemic! You guys seriously want to end up in the god damn hospital during a pandemic?”
Joni sighed in utter frustration. “Walt, just hang on. We’ll get Richard down—”
“Oh, my god!” Donna continued, despite the lack of panic coming from literally every other single person present. Even Walt seemed less alarmed than her. She started running to Richard and on any other day, it would have been an effortless plan of action. On this day, that Massachusetts had just seen a hell of a lot of snow, when the pavement was dangerously icy, she fell.
Meg screamed. “Oh, my god, I’m calling Dr. Fields!”
“He’s a doctor!” Joni pointed out. “A physical doctor—he won’t know how to deal with this sheer stupidity unless someone broke a bone!”
Donna, now over her initial shock, was attempting to get up.
“Donna, I think you’re hurt,” Meg said. “Just stay—”
Jacob was cautiously moving closer to her, directing her to stay put when Walt had finally lost his battle with the house. His hands slipped off and he went sliding down the edge of the roof. Richard hit the floor first, eliciting more screams from Meg and Donna, and then Walt followed onto several snow-covered bushes, and everyone lost their minds.
“I’m calling Dr. Fields! I am fucking calling Dr. Fields right now!” Meg repeated, shaking so much she could hardly get the phone out of her pocket, let alone find which one she had placed it in.
Joni began making her way through the snow to check if Richard was okay.”
“Oh, my god!” Donna was still repeating.
“Mom, just stay down,” Jacob said.
“Jesus,” Ransom snapped. “How hard is it to put these god damn lights on this god damn house?” He was following Joni, confident in the theory that his father was simply being dramatic. Walt, on the other hand, might have needed medical attention.
Meg watched her feet as she was walking back inside. “Dr. Fields, we have a serious emergency right now. I think everyone’s dying!”
Ransom and Joni were helping Richard sit up when he turned back to you. “Hey, get inside, you’re wet and going to get sick.”
He had a point, so without argument, you turned to do so. You felt the boniest of hands on your shoulders before you were shoved down face-first into the snow.
That was when Joni started screaming. “Oh, my god, call the police! She’s going to kill her. Meg, call the police!”
Meg ran out of the house and saw what was happening and once again, started to panic. “Dr. Fields, you need to get here immediately!”
Before you even fully processed what had happened, Linda was on top of you turning you onto your back.
“You stole my house!” she screeched.
“Linda!” Richard scolded.
You saw her hands go for your throat—later, everyone would claim she was probably doing something else, she obviously wasn’t going to choke you. You did the only thing you could think to do, you grabbed a handful of snow and shoved it in her face.
She toppled over and you made your way on top of her. You weren’t going to hit your boyfriend’s mother, but you did proceed to throw snow in her face until Ransom had gotten you off her.
The grand total of injuries was seven. Yet, the total of injuries that had occurred directly in the incident was five. Donna had a bruised tailbone, Richard had a broken leg, Walt had a sprained wrist, your knee was cut up fairly terribly since you fell on it when Linda pushed you, and Linda had stitches on her cheek because the first time you threw snow at her, there was a huge block of ice that you weren’t aware of. After Richard pointed out that you hadn’t started the altercation, she punched him, and he now had a swollen eye. After Ransom had gotten you inside, Meg, in her state of panic, hadn’t seen the door was shut and walked straight into it, and her nose was broken.
You weren’t sure how this family had managed more disaster with nearly 300 fewer people, but there you were. Ransom had forced you into the shower to get all the frosting out of your hair and to hopefully prevent the cold he suspected you were going to catch given the tiny outfit you were parading around in outside.
He lured you out of the shower with a mug of hot chocolate. Every space heater in the house was gathered in your bedroom and as soon as you were in his reach, Ransom wrapped you up in at least three heavy blankets.
When he sat you down on the bed, he pulled your leg out so he could tend to your knee. You felt like a child with him sat next to you with a first aid kit, too-delicately prodding at your irritated, aching skin. He was babying you.
You didn’t feel guilty for what you had done to Linda, but you did hate that Ransom was in the middle. “I’m s—”
He held his hand up to you. “Don’t.”
“But—”
He turned up to you. “Babe, she attacked you.”
“I…threw a cookie at her.”
He snorted. “Yeah, that was a little crazy.”
“I am sorry,” you huffed. “We said we weren’t going to let them bother us today.”
“You finally told her this was your house. I’ve wanted that since we first moved in. I know what we said, but all in all, I think we gained more than we lost.”
“What did we gain, Ransom?”
“Well, she knows you’re scrappy so she might think twice before pushing you again.”
You rolled your eyes. “Anything else?”
“Everyone is going to be preoccupied taking care of each other, Joni doting on Meg, my mom basically doing everything for my dad, Walt and Donna being overly protective of one another…”
“So, we can have sex in the kitchen and there’s a higher chance we won’t get caught?”
“That was exactly what I was thinking.”
You shrugged. “If we got Jacob a dog—”
“You know what?” he cut in. “Get out of these blankets, I haven’t spanked you in a long time even though you’ve deserved it about five times over by now.”
He made a show of attempting to get you out of the blankets even though you both knew he wouldn’t do it. You laughed the entire time until Ransom laid himself out on top of you, uncaring about how heavy he was.
“Is everyone okay?”
“They’ll live.”
“Well, I know Meg will—she’s going to get a nose job.”
He snorted, rolling his eyes. “You are just going to have to live vicariously through her.”
“We kinda ruined Thanksgiving dinner.”
“I did not,” he argued. “The turkey is almost done, the pies are in the other oven, also almost done—”
“All three?”
He nodded. “Yep. Jacob, believe it or not, was happy to peel and cut the apples.”
You rolled your eyes. “I swear, Ransom.”
“As soon as everyone stops acting like they’re dying, we’ll be able to sit down…well, Donna might not be able to sit down.”
You laughed. “Your family is insane.”
“And clearly, you fit right in.”
“Clearly,” you muttered. Unfortunately.
Christmas Eve:
Sometimes, you wished that you had listened to him when he said this wasn’t happening. Because then you wouldn’t have needed to worry about so many god damn people! It would just be you and Ransom in absolute seclusion, but no. No, you would never have it so easy during this fucking holiday.
How difficult was it to pick up the presents that you had ordered? You picked them out, you organized it all, you had only asked Ransom to drive to a single location and obtain them for you. Why hadn’t he? Because he was sleeping at 2 in the afternoon.
What did you have for Jacob? Not a damn thing. You had no presents for the teenage delinquent you were terrified of. You weren’t family, he was going to store you away in the basement and torture you until he got bored. Ransom probably wouldn’t even realize you had been missing until Jacob placed your body parts all over the house. And three of Meg’s presents were also missing, you knew Linda was going to make another comment.
You would hit her with more ice. After you strangled her son, of course, who was currently hot helping in any way at all.
“Ransom, put your fucking drink down and hand me the tape!”
“Are your fucking hands broken?!”
“I’m holding the box!”
He slammed his drink down on the bedside table and angrily stormed his way to where you were surrounded by boxes, wrapping paper, and a million other things he wasn’t even aware you’d spent money on. This was too much for his family and he was just waiting for you to realize that they were nowhere near worth the effort you constantly put in.
Ransom picked up the tape, tore a piece off, and placed it between where your fingers were resting on the box.
“Thank you so much,” you responded, pure sarcasm.
And god damn, he had had enough of your fucking tone. “You are driving me insane!”
“I’m driving you insane?! Your family has been ruing my whole fucking life since March!”
“I didn’t want them here!”
“Well, I’m a human with actual empathy for others, so I logically knew that that was not an option!”
“You were going to leave my mother out of your precious sanctuary!”
“Because she’s abusive!” You shoved your hands into your hair and shook your head. “I’m done, absolutely done. I can’t have this conversation with you again. Your mother sucks, why is this news to you? I’m so sorry for trying to hold her accountable for her actions. Oh, but of course, every time someone tries to make any of you face the consequences for your actions, you act like it’s a hate crime!”
He glared. “I hate you.”
“I hate you!” you seethed.
“I can’t fucking believe I actually want to do this!” he turned away, scrubbing one of his hands down his face. “You make me so fucking crazy.”
“Do what?” you demanded. “What the hell are you talking about now? What god-awful thing have you decided to do?”
He made his way to the bed, tearing open the drawer to the bedside table on his side. He was muttering quickly under his breath and even if his speech hadn’t been so hurried, it was quiet enough that you had no chance of hearing anything.
It was silent for several moments before he turned back to you and threw something on the bed. He gestured to it then crossed his arms over his chest.
Since your bed was a mess of dark blankets, you weren’t sure what you were supposed to be seeing. You stood, carefully stepping your way out of the present-wrapping station you had created and neared the bed. You stopped dead in your tracks when you saw a tiny black box against the mattress.
You looked back at him, eyes wide, pleading. No…no, that was not happening. He wasn’t actually…
“Marry me.”
“What?!”
He actually seemed surprised by your reaction. He leaned over, snatched the box off the bed, and stomped back to you. “Marry me.”
“You’ve lost it,” you accused. “You’re actually literally insane. You need to be committed!”
“Yes, it’s insane that I want to marry you but for some fucking reason, I do!”
“Oh, my god, Ransom!” You slapped the box out of his hands and that was just too much for him. “I’m not fucking marrying you, you’ve never even told me you love me!”
He hurriedly picked up the box, tossed it back onto the bed, and then grabbed you by your arms. “You’re seriously fucking bringing that up now?”
“What does that even mean?! Yes, I’m bringing it up now. You marry someone when you’re in love with them and since you haven’t said it after seven years, I understandably doubt your feelings for me.”
“You are such a fucking brat.”
“You’re a brat!” you yelled, more exasperated than you’d ever felt. “You’re such a fucking entitled brat! There’s no other way to describe you. You just think I’m going to say yes and give you everything you want when you can’t even say you love me!”
“This is absolutely fucking ridiculous.”
“Just fucking say it, Ransom! If you love me, just say it!”
“You will not bully me into saying something that I don’t even deem as important.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
“Love is a word! Okay? It means nothing. My parents fucking say they love each other, then my dad fucked someone else. Neal and Joni said they loved each other every god damn second that they could but guess what. He still died. And don’t even get me started on Walt and Donna, their “love” created the next great serial killer of this wonderful fucking country!”
You were speechless, Ransom never talked to you like this. He never brought up the fucked-up aspects of his family that had consequently fucked him up as well.
He finally let you go when he realized you weren’t going to say anything, turning to walk away. You startled when he banged his hand against the wall. “God damn it!”
“Why do you make me say it to you then?” you demanded.
“I don’t know!” he admitted.
Again, you were both silent. You were thinking of the best way to respond, and you certainly couldn’t come up with that, but you knew what you wanted to say. “I’m not marrying you.”
He laughed.
It was a terrifying sound that gave you chills. He was going to kill you, you were 90% sure. As soon as he started walking toward you, you turned away to run to the bathroom, but Ransom had always known that would be your plan.
He effortlessly caught you and dragged you back to the bed. He shoved you down, pinned your arms to the mattress to stop you from hitting him, and slid his hips between your legs to make it impossible to kick him. “You’re going to marry me.”
“You’re going to force me to marry you?”
“I’ll drag you to the fucking courthouse if I have to.”
“The courthouse?!”
“I want to give you a wedding, the obscenely priced, overly dramatic show that I know you want. But if you won’t say yes, you leave me no other option.”
You rolled your eyes. “Then I guess that’s what you’ll have to do because my answer is no.”
Luckily for him, your outfit was not overly complex. He knew you weren’t wearing anything under your skirt because his hand was between your legs for most of dinner that night. You didn’t let him make you come because you were throwing a temper tantrum over the situation with the presents, but he was evidently not deterred.
After he moved your wrists together and kept you held there, he used his free hand to get his pants out of the way. In seconds, he was fully inside you and was offering you no time to adjust.
You realized why when you felt his hands moving over your head. Turning up that way, you saw him fumbling with the box. He was going to put the ring on your finger, and you had the sinking suspicion you might not be able to part with it if you saw it. But no, this was not happening.
You managed to get one of your hands free and yanked on his hair.
He kissed you because he had nothing left to do but bite your lip. Hard. He didn’t even falter when you cried out.
He was the idiot who let you keep your shoes on and you were limited on where you could get your heel. You did yoga, but you weren’t some contortionist. You had one option, and that was stabbing your heel into the side of his ass, and it was completely his own fault.
Finally, he pulled away and was forced to let you on top, which was the only advantage you needed. You smacked the box off the bed. However, now that he wasn’t overly concerned with holding you to the bed, he could pull your hair until you relented and fell back onto the bed.
He rolled over several times until you were both on the very edge, managing to kick your heels off in the process. He never stopped driving his hips into you, knowing that the only advantage he had was how weak you always got for his cock.
You could hear him reaching around blindly on the floor but with each brush of his skin against your clit, you got less scared about the idea that he would get the ring on you. You knew you didn’t want it. You knew you didn’t want to marry him and there was no way in hell you would willingly say yes, but fuck, you wanted to come.
You touched the side of his face and he finally looked back at you.
“Say yes.”
“Fuck you.” You pulled him down, your lips meeting his. There was blood in the kiss and your lip was throbbing, but you couldn’t care. Not when he was fucking you this violently, this angrily. He’d never fucked you like this before. You were no stranger to Ransom being a cruel lover, but there had never been so much pure wrath.
He had located the box, you could tell when his fingernails stopped clicking against the hardwood floor. You were panicking, not fully thinking through your plans, you just knew you needed to be able to reach the box. You threw all your weight at him and he was barely balanced as it was.
Despite his anger, he still had more of a mind than you—probably because he wanted something out of this, he needed to be mindful to get his way. He basically let you throw him on the floor because he worried about the results if he managed to fall on you.
Instead of retaliating any further, you grabbed his hand and brought it down to your center. He needed no further prompt than that, his thumb began to circle your clit as his other hand grabbed your hip and moved you along the length of his cock.
Where was the box? On his chest, he set this there because he was the cockiest fucking asshole in the world. He saw you eyeing it and smirked. “Go ahead, baby, take it, but you know I’ll fucking stop.”
That was unimaginable. Both hands reached for the one he had on your hip. You continued rolling your hips like it was the last time you were ever going to get to, dragging his hand up to your mouth.
“I swear if you fucking bite me,” he warned.
No, you weren’t going to do that. Yet. You choked yourself on his fingers, stifling all the pathetic sounds that were spilling out from you. Ransom simply enjoyed the show, enjoyed you fucking yourself on his cock, enjoyed you staring at him with those smoky, delicate eyes as you sucked on his fingers.
He stopped touching your clit once he felt you coming. He used that hand to hold you up on your knees and thrust his hips into you punishingly. You were dizzy, disastrously satiated and overstimulated. He finished with a shaking moan, a tell that he was trying to be quiet.
It wasn’t late, the family was undoubtedly aware of what was going on.
He turned down, staring at the place you were still connected. Ransom waited until his cum was spilling out of you and then yanked you back down to take his entire length. If there was anything that Ransom did love in this world it was filling you with his cum and watching it slowly pour out.
You only allowed him to do this several times before you finally bit down on his fingers. His hand lifted from your hip and tore your hair back hard enough that you opened your mouth to yell at him. When he could pull his fingers from your mouth, he wrapped that hand around your neck and pulled you flat down, your chest to his, the ring box trapped between you and him, digging painfully into your ribs.
He slammed you into the wall and you brought your legs up to hook around his waist. “Sorry, daddy, I didn’t mean to bite you.”
“After I get this ring on you, I’m gonna make you call your parents and tell them we’re engaged. And I’m gonna fuck you and make you call me daddy, just to remind your father how much of a daddy’s girl you used to be.”
“Why call when you could Facetime?”
“Then I’m gonna have you choking on my cock, baby, all they need to see is the ring on your finger.” The hand in your hair wedged its way between you and him and he located your clit once more.
It was too much but you knew Ransom wasn’t going to care. Begging him to stop would just provide him enjoyment and that was the last thing you wanted him to have. He kept his other hand around your neck because he knew you would say something that would annoy the fuck out of him if he let you.
When you were coming, his hips were moving once more and his hand abandoned your clit to move the box. You felt it sliding along your skin until it was gone and then you realized he wasn’t holding your neck anymore. He had your left hand held clutched in his and you felt the cold band he was sliding onto your finger.
You couldn’t do much, you had lost and you knew it. But you could leave a few more marks on him, so you latched your free hand onto his shoulder and dragged your nails down his back, and you bit down on his shoulder harder than you probably should have. He was a fucking animal, it seemed like he didn’t care at all. He just wanted to get the ring on you, and once he had, he grabbed your face and shoved you back.
You knew he was trying to get you to look at the ring, but you refused. Your eyes were slammed shut and nothing was going to change that.
He walked you to the bathroom, pulling out to bend you over the counter because he knew you would instinctually lift both hands up to the edge. Once you had, he shoved his cock back inside you and grabbed your jaw to angle your face in the direction of your left hand. “Look at it.”
“Fuck. You!” you growled.
He smacked your ass and even though you shrieked like he was murdering you, you did not open your eyes. He repeated this several times until his own hand was stinging almost unbearably. New plan.
He used his feet to kick your legs apart further and you felt a sharp, sudden slap against your cunt. Your eyes snapped open and a scream tore from your throat. He almost felt bad until he saw your attention on the ring. Was he an ass? Yes. But had he won? Also, yes.
That fucking asshole. His hand dropped to rub over your aching pussy, cock still moving at a painfully fast pace. Ransom was fucking furious and the only way he could take it out on you was by fucking you this way.
You couldn’t say you had any complaints about it. Tomorrow, when you were pretending you couldn’t stand to look at him, you would be bruised and sore everywhere that he had touched you. You would be wet all day thinking about how it happened.
The fucking ring. A huge cushion-cut diamond set in a halo on top of a diamond-encrusted band. It wasn’t simple, it sounded like it, but there was something so beautiful about it. Fuck, you wouldn’t let this ring go unless you were dead. Because he was right. You liked money and diamonds and you were materialistic, and this was from Ransom and you loved everything he gave you. And at the end of it all, even though you were saying no to him, he shoved that ring onto your finger because you were his and that was never going to change.
“Say yes.”
“No.”
“Fine.” He reached for your hand but stopped when he saw you make a fist.
“Try to take this ring from me and I will fucking kill you, Ransom.”
He scoffed. “Great, I’m gonna get my phone to Facetime your parents.”
You rolled your eyes. “Fuck you.”
“Not yet,” he pointed out. “First, I need to fuck your mouth, but then—”
From outside, the dogs started to bark.
You let your head fall onto the counter and groaned. “I fucking swear, every fucking time we’re fucking—”
He pulled out and rushed from the bathroom.
“Hey!” you called out. “What the hell?”
“Shit, shit, shit,” he muttered to himself as he searched for where he’d thrown his pants. When had he even gotten them off?
“Ransom?”
“Wait there,” he directed and then he dashed out of the room.
“Excuse you!” It wasn’t like you had much of an option, your legs weren’t working yet, and you were sweating and gross, and bruised and your lip was swollen and clearly bitten.
After several moments, he hadn’t come back. What the hell was he up to? You winced and hummed, made any noise that made you feel slightly better, as you tiptoed around the room looking for something to put on. You settled on one of his shirts and slowly, pathetically made your way downstairs. “Ransom?”
No response.
“Hello, anyone?” If someone else was around, you could force them to look for your boyfriend instead of having to do so yourself. But it seemed that you were out of luck on that.
The dogs were still barking like crazy, but why was no one else reacting? And why did Ransom care? He never paid attention to the dogs. You followed the sound of their barking, they had moved from the backyard to the side of the house. Which was odd because they never went there.
The garage? Your suspicions were confirmed when you heard Linda complaining about something, being constantly interrupted by Joni, Walt, and Ransom. Okay, again, unusual. He tended to ignore his mother, not argue with her.
His eyes widened when he saw you in the doorway. “No, no, this has to stop. I need everyone out of this room.”
“What the hell is going on?” you questioned.
“We don’t want to alarm you,” Donna began, “But—”
“Pretty sure he has drugs,” Meg claimed. “Like, hardcore drugs. Heroin, probably.”
Your eyes widened at him.
He glared. “I don’t have drugs, don’t be ridiculous.”
You gasped, pointing in the direction of the dogs still barking outside. “Those are German Shepherds, they’re drug dogs!”
Meg gasped, nodding at you with wide eyes. “I’m calling the cops.”
“Knock it off,” Linda scolded. “Ransom, show us what you’re hiding right now, or we’ll tear this room apart.”
He rolled his eyes, storming over to the corner of the room where a sheet was laid over something. “Fine, merry fucking Christmas.” He yanked it off one of the old kennels Linda used for her dogs when they were being trained.
There was a long list of things you were suspecting to see. Three sleeping puppies? No, they were nowhere on the list. And then you realized that was why he hadn’t gone to pick up Jacob’s present.
“You got me more puppies?” Linda inquired.
You, along with most of the room, glared at her.
“No,” Ransom snapped. “One is for Jacob and one’s for Meg.”
Both Jacob and Meg excitedly ran to the cage, startling the puppies awake. Much to Ransom’s dismay, the baby talk began without a second thought and the puppies were whining and making those small noises that always irritated him.
One for Jacob. One for Jacob. Then…the third. Oh, god.
He turned to you with a sigh.
“Yes,” you said, “Yes, yes, a million times yes!” You ran across the room, ignoring all your aching limbs and threw yourself into his arms. “And I’ll stop being so mean to you, and if you want to do this at the courthouse, I won’t even be upset because you’re so good to me and I’m awful to you. I’m sorry!”
“It’s okay,” he assured.
“No,” you protested. “It’s a million times not okay! I’m so sorry.” You pulled back to touch his face. “I’m really, really sorry. But I’m going to be the best wife in the world—”
“What?” Joni cut in.
That was the only thing in the world that could have drawn attention away from the puppies.
“Wife?” Linda repeated.
You checked with Ransom and he nodded. He had been looking forward to this. All you had to do was hold out your hand and Joni and Meg were excitedly shrieking. There hadn’t been a wedding in the family in so long.
“Wow,” Walt said. “Ransom? Engaged, showing commitment? This is the strangest year I’ve ever lived.”
Ransom rolled his eyes.
Before another word could be said, Linda collapsed onto the floor. Richard and Walt were the only ones who felt alarmed at the situation, while everyone else moved in closer to see the puppies.
“Which one is ours?” you wondered.
“Yours,” he corrected. “And the blonde one. She was the least yappy I could find on such short notice.”
Your eyebrows pulled together. “Where did you go?”
“The pound, obviously.”
“I fucking love you,” you blurted out, grabbing his face to pull him down into a kiss.
Once again, the room echoed with disgusted sounds.
“Which one’s mine?” Meg wondered.
“I couldn’t care less,” he admitted.
“I’m gonna name mine Hugh,” Jacob announced.
Ransom gave you an expectant look.
“I love you?” you tried.
“Gonna need a lot more than that.” He picked you up and because you knew Ransom wasn’t going to accept any kind of attitude from you for a very long time, you hooked your legs and arms around him and willingly went.
“I’ll take care of your dog until you guys are done being gross!” Meg promised.
chris tags:
@onetwo3000​ @chris-evans-indian-fanfic​ @donutloverxo​ @kleohoneyao3​ @cevans-fics​
ransom tags:
@la-cey​
280 notes · View notes
siswritesyanderes · 3 years
Note
This is a series of asks bc, while I do LIKE all the charas of Fantastic Beasts individually, much of the romantic pairings dont sit well with me. By that mean the messy love polygon w Newt & I think I finally figured out why & I'd like another's opinion on it. For starters, Newt's attraction with Tina is too fast for me considering he was friends w Leta, got expelled out of Hogwarts for Leta, carried Leta's photo in his case, & basically loved her for YEARS. But this is all undone by a [1]
jaunt in NY having met a woman, who he admittedly went on a huge adventure w, over the course of maybe a few weeks. He's so taken w her she replaces Leta's photo w her own &, after refusing to go to Paris for Dumbledore, leaves immediately once he finds out she's there. I just find this unbelievable. I can rationalize it from Newt's perspective where Tina is a fresh breeze sweeping into his life on (percieved) unrequited pining, but this is my conjecture based on my understanding of Newt. [2]
The audience shouldnt be left to rationalize endgame couple of the mc on their own. & the whole thing w Leta is so messily handled I dont think they can save it even if they bring her back in FB3. How she feels for Newt vs Theseus & unresolved lingering affection, etc. She & Newt were SO important to each other & we SEE that & they dont HAVE to get together, but they need proper resolution bc they have actual history between them. God Leta in general deserved so much better. [3]
But my main gripe is that this love polygon serves no purpose to what I believe is the main selling point of FB: the world. HP having love stories makes sense bc we're following the story of a boy as he goes through adolescence & his journey through that via school is part of that, which is why the romance feels fitting. It's a very personal story. FB on the otherhand is the best peak we have at the wider wizarding world beyond school. HP introduces the world of magic, but FB rlly expands it [4]
To that end Jakob & Queenie's relationship is the only one I find myself liking, bc it's deeply tied to the world setting, the series' biggest selling point (in my opinion, should have said this earlier). It underscores the attitudes of the period & the conflict they face feels suitably substantial & not like filler. There's a moral question between them of are they worth it? And how far should they go to be together?
Imma be real hear & say FB2 was rlly Queenie's movie & they should have been ballsy & just make Queenie the mc for FB2, bc her story was actually considerably more important to the overall development of the story than Newt's, which mostly came off as a rushed & a tad clichè soap drama. & making it about Queenie I think builds more room for good conflict & independent narrative for Tina that would serve her chara better. [5? 6?]
If I bad to be REAL ballsy, I'd say my big issue w/ the relationships in the FB series & how it enhances or impedes the main story & what I believe to be it's biggest attracter (the setting) could have been solved if they made Newt's romantic interest a muggle. It attaches a deeper meaning & relevance to them & the story so it felt more deeply that they truly moved WITH the narrative rather than beside it but I guess Im just picky. Thx for putting up w this! [Final]
(My response below the cut.)
Yeah, pretty much all of this is right.
Regarding the Tina thing, it was definitely rushed, especially since there was literally nothing romantic between them in the whole first movie, except maybe the end part where they're stumbling over their words. Despite knowing how movies work and knowing that they were the male and female lead, I still found that completely out of left field, because they don't really share any interests and I didn't feel like they felt anything in particular for each other before that. She really wants to be an auror and feels really intensely about it; he just wants to travel the world and write about magical creatures and take care of them. I don't see a lot of compatibility there, and the movie didn't really do anything to reconcile that gap.
Jacob and Queenie made sense, because they actually sowed some seeds for it. It's not even about the fact that they both like to cook; they showed an interest in each other throughout. They noticeably like each other. Newt and Tina never really had that, to me, so it was bizarre for her to become his primary motivation in the second movie.
Queenie's trajectory in movie 2 overall bothers me, so while I agree it would have been better if they'd centered it more around her, I definitely think they needed to drastically rewrite pretty much everything she did. Enchanting Jacob at the beginning never sat well with me; I usually only have to say this in the Descendants fandom, but if one half of the ship is magical and the other half isn't, we can't have the magical one enchanting the non-magical one for romantic reasons without addressing what a violation of trust that is. Like, Jacob would be justified for never trusting her again, over that. Also, the fact that she apparently holds it against people if they think bad things about her is not something I would expect from someone who has been a Legilimens as long as she has, and not a detail I like, at all. Especially since it was used to give her justification to be mad at Jacob after she enchanted him in the first place. I find it sad, because Queenie was definitely my favorite character in the first movie. (Also, joining Grindelwald was a nonsensical thing to do. I can only assume she's there to spy on him or something, because it makes literally no sense.)
As for Leta, I really don't like how that was approached. First of all, I don't like how their mention of her in the first movie was "She was a taker; you need a giver," because once we actually met the character, that only made me resent Queenie for representing her that way. Leta deserved better in pretty much every way, and they definitely shouldn't have killed her off like that. I find the whole situation really iffy from a racial standpoint. The first black character to be written three-dimensionally in all of HP lore, and they make sure to preemptively tell the audience that she's a "taker", kill her in the same movie we meet her, and manage to trivialize her death by turning it into a little "Who was she saying 'I love you' to?" mystery. I like her relationship with Newt and Theseus, and I'd definitely want to see more of it.
Yes, it definitely would have been better, thematically, if they'd made the love interest a Muggle. (I'd honestly say they should've paired Newt with Jacob, but I know they're unwilling to do that. That would be kind of cool, though, to see the movie shaping up with two male characters and two female characters and have the men end up with each other and the women just live their lives as humans.)
With the story they ended up telling, though, I don't think that is needed; since Queenie is already dealing with the wizard/Muggle storyline, Newt could have a different conflict. Maybe his love interest should be a werewolf or something, to tie in the wizarding world's unresolved dislike for "half-breeds". And if he were in a relationship with someone already regarded as a creature, the wider wizarding world might take a different view to his studies and look down on him a lot more. Idk, a thought.
And then, with Leta/Theseus and Grindelwald/Dumbledore (if they were willing to actually deal with that), they'd pretty much hit every controversial beat they've got: wizard/Muggle, wizard/"half-breed", interracial, homosexual. Credence and Nagini are both creatures, kind of, but I still like them together, so their relationship doesn't have to tie into any theme; it just has to be developed way more.
On the whole, Crimes of Grindelwald felt like they skipped a movie. It feels like they needed a middle installment to make these relationships happen, instead of jumping from "Do Newt and Tina maybe have feelings for each other?" to "Newt loves Tina and Tina is possessive enough of Newt to be outwardly upset with him when she thinks he's engaged to someone else," and creating a whole relationship between Credence and Nagini that we see none of.
The fact that Queenie and Jacob were done well in the first movie gives me a fair amount of goodwill for them, but that goodwill only offers enough cushioning from the botching that movie 2 did that I'm near-indifferent to the ship, now, instead of actively opposed. I'd like to see things improved, but as it currently stands, I'd be just as happy seeing them end up not together as together. The fact that Leta's relationships with Newt and Theseus were more interesting than any of the aforementioned makes it that much more ridiculous that they killed her. What ship am I supposed to care about how? If I can't go into the next movie delusionally hoping Newt and Leta will get some moments, or enjoying the Theseus and Leta content, then I'll just be sitting there waiting for Credence and Nagini to share a screen, and who knows when that'll happen?
29 notes · View notes
itsclydebitches · 3 years
Note
I’m the tin foil hat anon and I wanted to thank you for the response on my bb submission, you make great points. Although I was frustrated that some of them raised even more questions I didn’t think of myself… UGH… lol the S2 wait is gonna be painful
On the point of crosshair thinking his chip was removed a looong time ago(meaning before bracca or even as early as ep1) it wouldn’t make sense bc of his response to Hunter’s “you tried to kill us, we didn’t have a choice”. He says “and I did?”. So he seems to be aware he couldn’t control himself in all their previous encounters. Does it mean he knows his actions were due to chip then?
And you say crosshair avoiding the “when” question can be due to him not caring if the horrible actions he committed are chip or himself and it’s meant to show that he truly is despicable and evil. It could be the case because he shows absolutely no remorse or regret over slaughtering civilians, never apologizes to his brothers for not only trying to kill them but almost successfully incinerating(!!!) them. On top of that (apparently) without a chip he casually murders his own squad without a blink of an eye right in front of them.
On the other hand, he shows care for Omega’s safety in that episode and wants a better place in the universe for his brothers(even if it’s obviously a mistake). He sounds hurt and betrayed by them yet he still wants what he thinks is best for them. He seemed genuine and sincere in that moment. Even after they refused to join he protected them against the droids. He had multiple opportunities to shoot Hunter or others in the back but never did(and looked like didn’t even consider it). BUT after all of that he decides to raise his gun and try to shoot hunter who already has his gun drawn?! And in front of the whole squad holding him at gun point!!! WTF was he thinking?! WHY? I know they rejected his offer but still. Did his reveal completely change his plans? I just don’t understand. I know he is meant to be “complex and nuanced character with layers” but what a mood swing lmao
As much as I loved and enjoyed the bad batch overall I’m beginning to think that all these inconsistencies aren’t meant to be a crafty set up for next season. What they most likely are is just writers being vague on purpose so they don’t write themselves into a corner.
And as to why the batch and Omega didn’t even try to rescue their brother could just be so that Hunter and Crosshair would have this drama and disagreement at the end. Despite brad rau claiming their argument was over ideological differences. And Jen Corbett saying in that same cursed interview that the batch always love and support each other no matter what because they’re family. Well, I guess not crosshair, he doesn’t count anymore lol
And I agree with you I’d rather see the batch acknowledging they could have done more to try and rescue him than go into the chip details. However, I have a suspicion the real reason or explanation on why they never went back for him isn’t going to be brought up ever. Even *in universe* it simply does not make sense. Just makes me sad seeing how many people also try to come up with explanations. That should have been the writers job to provide something besides Hunter’s “you tried to kill us” bc that’s a weak argument and a total bs since he was SHOCKED to learn crosshair doesn’t have a chip.
Btw sorry for the long posts lol I just found your takes very intriguing
The season two wait is something awful and I only just started it lol. No worries about long asks though! My blog has become quite meta heavy over the years, so this is normal for my inbox. Besides, it’s a bit of a pot and kettle situation. It's not like my answers are particularly concise :D
Okay first, I have the unpopular (?) opinion that Crosshair was never planning to shoot Hunter, partly for the reasons you lay out here. You’re right, it doesn’t make sense, and rather than just accepting that he had that kind of “mood swing" (which would be pretty bad writing based on everything else we've seen) I think it does make sense that this was never his intention at all. Rather, it’s just a setup to make the audience think he’s about to shoot Hunter—that’s the obvious goal of that moment: the shock, drama, confusion, and then relief—but that doesn’t mean that in-universe that was ever Crosshair’s goal, even for just a split second. Omega leaves the pod. Echo, crucially, says that he can’t see her, setting up that Crosshair with his enhanced sight is probably the only one who could. He grabs his rifle off screen and as he does, Hunter leans over the side of the pod as he prepares to jump in, precisely where Crosshair needs to aim to hit Omega. Hunter is in his way. He’s directly in the line of fire, not because Crosshair is aiming for him, but just because that's where Omega is and they're both aiming for her: Crosshair with his rifle, Hunter ready to dive. The little shift Crosshair makes reads to me as him ensuring he doesn’t hit Hunter, despite him being right where he needs to aim, not him full on changing targets.
Even if we choose to read it as him deliberately aiming at Hunter—because yeah, the scene is meant to be ambiguous—I don’t think he, like, meant it meant it. Crosshair, as we’ve seen throughout TBB and TCW, can be pretty antagonistic. He likes to do things to get a rise out of people, like staring at regs until they snap at him, or pushing Rex’s buttons until he swings. If he was choosing to aim at Hunter in that moment, rather than Hunter just being in the way, I think it’s only bravado. Remember the “Don’t make the same mistake twice. Don’t make me your enemy” line? Crosshair has a need to remind others of his skill and power—whether it’s playfully like in TCW, or more seriously in TBB—and that’s likely what this is here. “Hey, Hunter. Look. I got my weapon back. I’ve got you cornered. I’m about to save our sister when you can’t. Remember that I’m good and you need me.” Those feelings of abandonment are tied up in that need to be needed, so when Crosshair is seething at being left behind, brutally showing them how he can get a drop on their leader and doing the thing they can't (save Omega) is a great way to remind them of what they threw away/re-boost his own self-esteem. But none of that means shooting Hunter was ever a real possibility. Because nowhere else do we see Crosshair willingly trying to harm his team. He does while under the chip’s influence, but then he never hurts Hunter when he’s captured. He kills his new team before they can hurt the batch. He helps them fight off the droids. There’s a tussle, but it’s not choreographed like either he or Hunter truly intends harm. Crosshair demonstrates no aggression during the entire escape, willingly gives up his weapon after saving Omega, and just stands there as they leave. If this guy actually wanted to hurt them, he would. Which is more likely, that Crosshair had a split second of real murder intent across two episodes of doing everything possible to help his team, or that this was just a mean bluff?
But personally, I don’t even think it was a bluff. I think the coincidence of Crosshair needing to aim there and Hunter already being there is just meant to imply an attack for the audience, not imply that Crosshair, in-universe, ever intended to hurt him, even for just a second. If he had, he wouldn’t look so surprised and sad when he realizes the others are pointing their weapons at him. If he was out to shoot Hunter, even if only for a moment, seeing his brothers come to his defense would be expected; a given. But if he only ever intended to save Omega, then seeing their weapons trained on him would produce the emotions we saw: shock that they’d turn on him and then severe disappointment. From Crosshair’s perspective, he didn’t do anything wrong and never intended to do wrong either. Hence, looking away in disbelief that his need to aim through Hunter was taken as a serious threat. He's realizing that they honestly believe that he would hurt them. Not the chipped version of him, but just him, all on his own.
As for the rest of his characterization, I think your point that “You tried to kill us” is a weak argument is pretty important. Meaning, Crosshair knows he didn’t attack his team and nearly kill them, the Empire controlling him like a puppet did. He (arguably) doesn’t owe them an apology for something that he was as much a victim for. However, we usually expect one anyway—like Wrecker still apologizing to Omega—because that's how people who have hurt loved ones react, whether the hurt was intentional or not, but that guilt is currently overshadowed by his fury that they left him behind. For him I think it’s a bit of a circular problem. Yes, he nearly killed them… but he wouldn’t have nearly killed them if they’d come back and rescued him. With the obvious disclaimer that the Empire is the real evil here, Crosshair as a threat is a bit of a problem of the batch's own making. If they’d done the right thing and gotten him out, there wouldn’t have been these scary moments like the engine incident. If they’d at least tried, then Crosshair likely would have been more guilt-ridden because he hurt his brothers who were trying to help him. As it stands, he tried to hurt the people who claim they're his brothers, but who left him behind. That's why he presents this second chance as magnanimous: from Crosshair's perspective, they haven't done anything to earn his care, but they're getting it anyway. An apology though? That's pushing things too far. If when Wrecker turned the group had locked him somewhere in the ship and gone off planet, leaving him there under the justification “Well, he tried to kill us!" would Wrecker still return with apologies for his actions... or would he be primarily pissed at being left like that, withholding apologies because they did him harm intentionally, whereas he did harm under another's control? I mean, maybe he'd be forgiving (the huge difference between his and Crosshair’s personalities is another factor), but also maybe not. Having Crosshair apologize for the near-death experiences requires 1. For him to feel responsibility for something that was forced on him and 2. For him to not be absolutely furious at the batch for abandoning him. They've gotta work through that before Crosshair can acknowledge that guilt.
Killing his second team on the other hand… idk if the batch cares, honestly. It was the killing of civilians that they balked at, not other fighters like themselves. Even the Jedis’ execution, something they clearly didn’t like, wasn’t enough to turn them from the Empire, presumably because the Jedi are capable of defending themselves. They fell in battle. It’s only when the Empire asks them to kill kids and untrained civilians that they go, “Absolutely not. This organization is evil.” Murder of other fighters was, you know, not great, but not worth defecting over either. Crosshair’s second team is made up of fighters who have been trying to kill them, so they’re definitely fair game. If we removed Crosshair’s plan from the situation and the batch was just fighting their way off Kamino after a capture, would they have also killed the team without a blink of an eye? Probably. It's self-defense. The second they raised their blasters it became a battle and, unless you’re specifically out to stun someone for some reason, battles end bloody. The shock is which side Crosshair was on, not that one side was willing to murder the other. It’s definitely messed up from our perspective that Crosshair laid a trap to murder his team to prove a point… but from the batch’s perspective? Crosshair killed a bunch of imperial fighters who were threatening them during a battle. That’s just an average Tuesday for them, nothing much to get upset over.
And omg don’t get me started on Crosshair wanting to find Omega a family! Like yeah, it’s obviously a #mistake and his faith in the Empire is Super Messed Up but... the underlying motivation is so good. It’s another situation where there’s no easy answer. Which is more important: Omega’s emotional health where she grows up with clones like her, the people who are now 100% her family, or her physical health, where she stays some place where she’s not always getting shot at, kidnapped, at risk of going hungry, etc.? It’s easy as the audience to go, “Of course she belongs with her dads!!” but if you choose to read the story through any realistic lens, Crosshair absolutely has a point about this being terrible environment for a kid, the exact point the batch themselves were making until Omega begged to stay. I love my feral, compassionate child but let me tell you, I YELLED when she yeeted herself out of that pod. This is a traumatized, formerly isolated kid with absolutely zero self-preservation, combined with, at times, a lack of basic common sense that’s inevitable in children (like not realizing she can’t pull a very heavy droid up through the water). As emotionally gutting as the thought is and, in this particular case, a Very Bad Idea, I really can’t fault anyone for raising the possibility that she go somewhere else, somewhere she’s likely to survive into her teens 😅
13 notes · View notes
pendragaryen · 4 years
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
The things that stay with us...
This was supposed to be my last BFSN-post while the show is still airing - the last BFSN-entry right before the series finale. But now it’s just... a FSN-post? Call it a Big-Hug-post. A Hug-Gratitude-post. Or whatever you prefer. Though in my heart Bellarke will ALWAYS be canon (and nothing can ever change that): They didn’t give it to us in the actual show (a show, whose narrative clearly told us otherwise all this time, but well.. whatever...). It’s too much honour to grace such a disappointing last season with a BFSN, dearies. (Or... even more so now? ;P ) So, call it what you like i guess! ;). Honestly, i didn’t want it to end.. just like that... without any last words to you, the kindest, most tolerant and beautiful minded fandom i’ve ever been (proudly!) a part of since 2016. (The selfie lies. It’s not current. I’m sorry, i can’t show you my face these days.. This is from the day just before it all went inevitably down with this season: BB’s death. So... enjoy: That smile’s for you, fam! ;) 2nd pic: The tattoo i got almost two years ago now, on Sept. 22nd 2018, and that never fails to remind me of my emotional support person and the fact, that after every “down” in life there will come an “up” again <3<3<3 )
What makes the whole experience of this last ever season of The 1OO for me so incredibly sad is.... Well, please bear with me if you will... My english STILL isn’t the very best... But i’m trying to put my feelings into words:
Last year, when we got the news that S7 would be the final season, i DREADED this moment. I was AFRAID of this last day (and the hours) before the actual finale. And why so? Bc I am a person, who’s an incredible loser when it comes to let go of the things i love so dearly. Like The 1OO. I... in times i was OBSESSED with it, with the story, with the chacracters and the way they’ve been written, so credible, so tangible in their actions, nothing was just bad or good and even the villains actions had been understandable to some extend. It was amazing! I felt with almost every character! I LOVED it. (And to be very clear here: I’ll never STOP loving The 100′s 6 seasons, that are still existing for me!)
But what i wanted to say is: I dreaded the moment when l would have to let it go. THat inevitable moment, when this show with all its storylines and characters, that have been a part of my life for the last years and that i love so dearly, really ends. Forever. It would end and i wouldn’t be ready to let go, bc it means the world to me. Bc it changed me in more than just one way - no, even better, bc it made me want to change myself! “To do better...” *ugly crying...* THis show SAVED me in a way and in a time, where i was in a very dark place in life, in a very dark mind space (constant illnesses, termination of my job due to these illnesses, an ugly lawsuit etc. pp) , this show and its actors, especially one Robert Alfred Morley (yes), who helped me to look at myself and my mental insecurities and illness from a whole new point of view. I wasn’t ashamed of myself anymore. I felt... relieved. Understood. I even felt kind of loved for what i am, even with my anxieties. (There may or may not come a point or even a person in everyones life, that helps to develop this new kind of view on themselves. And for me this person was and always will be Bob Morley. And whatever happens, i’ll always love him for his open- and kindness and be thankful for his inspiration. I still call myself lucky to have talked with him a couple of times. I treasure these moments. Always.)
So, i was AFRAID of this day, when this all would come to an end. I KNEW it would wreck me, i would be devestated, i would be so incredibly sad, that i won’t be able to put it into words.
And here i am now. I AM sad. I AM devestated. But for so very different reasons that i could never imagine in my wildest nightmares... This last season... Season 7--- no i won’t start again. Not AGAIN. But... just that: What they’ve been creating for us here... it really overshadowed my joy of watching this show throughout this last season, yes even BEFORE that horrible murder of my all time fave and comfort character. I take back whatever i said about S6 or even S5. THIS... S7 was the season, that didn’t feel like the show i fell in love with anymore. Though changes CAN be refreshing and exciting... these changes haven’t been that for me.
Look. The thing is: Even WITH Bob’s request for time off and everything... There would’ve been PLENTY options for the writers to actually make it all make kind of sense! THEY COULD’VE DONE IT BETTER! If they’d really wanted to, that is... And here’s the point: I think they didn’t WANT it. For whatever reasons, whatever happened bts, they decided to do it like they did. And no-one’s able to understand their choices or the characters anymore - those characters we used to know so well, these characters i felt with over the course of so many seasons - who i could understand! EVEN THE VILLAINS! And now... look at the thanks we got. I can’t understand shit anymore when it comes to S7. Bc nothing makes sense. When i see even the GREATEST meta-writers among us surrender in their posts - than it’s really sad times for this fandom...
It’s not even just about Bellarke anymore. Sure, i AM disappointed that they’re not canon now. But then they shouldn’t have arranged the whole story around these two! “The backbone of the whole story”!!! I am laughing. In that case S7 was SPINELESS! Let me tell you. Everyone’s just... flailing around... great little side storylines, but somehow... disconnected from each other and all over the place. That’s how it felt for me to watch this season. And i’m feeling so exhausted by now... I never stopped hoping... I always thought, at some point it would make sense. I’ve read all your great metas AND I WANTED TO BELIEVE! It made perfect sense! (I seriously felt like Fox Mulder from time to time this season... and the lack of sense in the storyline as well as the complete absence of my personal faves (yes i include Clarke (Eliza) here, bc heck, she was so sidelined this season too, self inflicted or not) - all these things had been the “UFO’s or aliens i was hoping to see” one day... Guess i was wrong.)
I’m babbling... Sorry. But it will be for the last time in that kind of form. Promise.
At the end of the day (at the end of all things.. sigh, Frodo... i see you... *blinks back tears*) I am so glad that you’re all here with me, in the same boat. That I’m not alone feeling this kind of lost and baited and betrayed. Bc whatever you like to call it: The narrative promised us otherwise. Did JRott OWE us canon Bellarke? NO. Of course not. But HIS STORY did. The story he’d been telling us for SIX GD YEARS! THAT is what makes me so mad. But most of the time (and despite the selfie above) i’m just sad. Sad and disappointed. I know it will pass one day. And that i’ll find joy in watching S1-4, even S5 except for a couple of scenes, and certain episodes of S6 again. But now is not the day. Even IF they’ll give these characters a “happy ending” in some transcended form or whatever, in the afterlife maybe,... S7 is ruined for me. It wasn’t even a bliss for me before, but it was certainly ruined after they killed “The Heart” - pointlessly (THIS is what will haunt me even years from now..).
Today is the day for saying goodbye. It aches my heart, that we’ll have to do it the way we have to now. But at least we are together. So let’s raise a glass in honour of all the hours of joy and excitement this show brought us over the years, maybe even the tears and laughter, let’s raise a glass for the outstanding performances of the cast and the great storylines some writers developed for us. I am thankful beyond words. Let’s raise a glass to this awesome, talented fandom! I’ve met and talked to dozens of you guys througout the years, and it had always been a pleasure! I hope we’ll stay in touch! <3<3<3 And last but not least: Let’s raise a glass for Kass Morgan. This is HER baby in more than just one way. Without her vision... there wouldn’t have been a show. Or even Bellarke. CANON Bellarke, that is! ;) And i LOVE it!
These are the things that stay with us, these are the things we will remember.
So, have fun with the finale tonight guys! Or should i say: Good luck? ;) I won’t watch now. I haven’t watched since 7x13, and i won’t start again tonight. Not even for the finale. BUT... i’ll probably do it some day in the future. I’m still kind of curious after all. And there are still some characters i want to know how it ends for them. It‘s just... i don’t want to support any ratings. I don’t want to support JRott anymore. But i’ll probably get back to it - if what y’all will write about it afterwards looks promising or not... ;)
See you on the other side!
(Tags under the cut)
Hugs and love to you, dear fam! Tagging @together-is-my-favourite-place @natassakar @geekyogicheese @immortalpramheda @carrieeve @bellamyblake @angelbellamy @burninghoneyatdusk @iwearplaids @wankadi @katersann @nvermindiseeyou @ruggedmurphy @clarkgriffon @poppykru @broashwhat @malclmbright @kizo2703 @cominguproses13x @clarkeindra @tenmonologues  @shialablunt @sometimesrosy @zavens @wonderingwhyy @charmainediyoza @the-suns-also-rise @lee-em-dee @bellamynochillblake​ @junebugninja @songhyeri @underbellamy @talistheintrovert @jeanie205 @bellamys11thfreckle @doontpanic @clarkegriffinblake @goddess-clarke @eyessharpweaponshot @hostagetakerandhistraitor @infp-with-all-the-feelings @theatre-steph @historyofbellarke @as-inevitable-as-morning @bisexualbellamyblake @little-oxford-st @delicatebluebirdruins in no particular order (i am so sorry in advance, if i should’ve forgotten someone... >.<), and yes, i include you too @merlination my Danny, bc without you, i wouldn’t have started watching The 1OO in the first place... ;)
119 notes · View notes
cinnamon-roll-seth · 4 years
Text
Happy Medium (Part Two) || Rafe Cameron x Maybank!Reader
Part One
Tumblr media
Request: hi! um this is oddly specific but i had this idea so... can you possibly do an imagine where rafe and the reader are dating and rafe is like super super sweet (and she makes him a better person🥺), but the reader is also jjs sister and he gets really mad when he finds out about the relationship bc he is really protective of her, but at a party or something a touron messes with the reader and rafe sticks up for her so jj starts to come around to the idea of their relationship
“Babe come on. It’s your birthday, you have to have a party!” Rafe pleaded, pacing around his room as you laid on his bed reading some fashion magazine Sarah had given you.
“No I don’t. Lots of people don’t have parties on their birthdays.”
“Y/N you’ve had a party for your birthday every single year since like forever. It’s how I had your birthday memorized even before we started dating.”
“Yeah and no offense but most of those parties ended up getting ruined by kooks. Besides, it’s not like JJ or any of my friends will even be there so what’s the point.”
“But the kooks wouldn’t be there to ruin it this time. Please, just let me throw you a fun party for your birthday. It’ll take your mind off everything that’s been going on. You can get wasted off your ass and I’ll stay sober to take care of you.”
“Promise?” You ask, looking up from the magazine.
“Promise,” He grins.
“Fine. But I require fruity drinks that are going to taste like pure sugar but still get me fucked up after like five sips. Beer is getting really old.”
“Of course. Anything for you Sunshine. Hey I gotta go meet up with Topper and Kelce about something. I’ll be back in an hour, you good to stay here?”
“Yeah. Rose was gonna teach me how to make some Greek meal that she learned how to make when she visited there, since I’m always saying I want to go.”
“Alright well, have fun. I’ll see you in a bit,” He leans down to plant a kiss on your forehead before disappearing out his bedroom door.
-
“Oh hell no,” JJ growls, seeing Rafe standing on the porch in front of him.
“Wait,” Rafe sticks his foot out and stops him from closing the door, “Please JJ, it’s important.”
“What the hell do you want? I thought I made it clear that I don’t want you hear. Leave.”
“Y/N‘s birthday is in two days. I’m throwing a party and I want you and the other three to come. She’s been having a really tough time these past couple weeks and I know she’d be happy if you guys came.”
“A party at your kook house surrounded by other kooks, yeah not interested. Didn’t think Y/N would ever be interested either but I guess you got your claws deeper than I thought. I trust you’ll tell her happy birthday from me?”
“Okay dude, what is your goddamn problem? I get it, you don’t like me, but Y/N is your sister. You’re supposed to be there for her but no. Instead of supporting her and being happy that she’s happy you and your friends have all been complete assholes towards her. You guys have cut off all contact and have completely alienated her because you all have too much pride and hatred for kooks to accept that she’s in a relationship with one. I’ve sat and watched for two goddamn weeks as she’s been borderline depressed, struggling with the fact that you all have disowned her. You know you guys think we’re the bad guys but you have stooped so low as to treat one of your own like complete shit simply because she fell in love with one of us. This isn’t fucking Romeo and Juliet, get over yourselves. We’re not having the party at my house, it’ll be on the beach because I know she’ll be most comfortable there. And for your information, she didn’t even want to party. I begged her to let me throw her one so I wouldn’t have to watch her be sad on her own birthday. I came here to ask you if you’d come because I know it would make her happy but if you’re going to show up acting like that then don’t bother. Goodbye JJ,” Rafe rants angrily, stepping back to exit the porch while leaving your brother standing in the open doorway in shock.
-
“Jesus you look beautiful,” Rafe grins, watching as you do a little spin in the party dress he’d bought you. You told him not to but he insisted and who were you to tell him no.
“Stop, you’re making me blush,” You laugh.
“As you should be because you look gorgeous. You ready to go? I told everyone to start showing up at six.” You nod and he grabs your hand, dragging you out of his room.
When you get to the beach the sun is just starting to set and the beach is already packed. You and Rafe walk through the crowd, searching for Kelce and Topper, who were in charge of protecting your girly alcohol. You clutch your boyfriend’s hand, overwhelmed by the amount of people you don’t even know shouting happy birthday at you.
“Yo Y/N! Happy birthday! Don’t worry, we got the good stuff!” Kelce shouts as you near the pair of boys, handing a bottle of pink lemonade UV out towards you. (A/N: Fun fact, I got waisted off of Pink Lemonade UV on my 18th birthday and ended up puking all over my aunt. Good times lmao. Drink responsibly kids.)
“What, no mixer?” You ask, taking the bottle from him.
“Oh we got that covered,” Topper replies, holding up an old milk jug full of some pink liquid. Pink Lemonade probably, it’s a good thing that’s your favorite drink.
“Well thank you boys. I’m honored,” You smile, pouring a generous amount of alcohol into your plastic cup, followed by some of the pink lemonade.
You continue to hang out with Rafe and the boys, drinking, laughing, and just genuinely goofing around. While pouring your fifth drink you look up and watch as a familiar group of pogues walk along the beach, through the crowds of people.
“What the hell are they doing here?” You ask Rafe, pointing towards them.
“I asked them to come. I figured you’d like it if they came. With the way JJ reacted I didn’t actually expect them to show.” He replies, looking shocked to see them.
“Can you hold this for a minute? I’ll be right back.” You give him a reassuring smile while he takes your drink.
You head for your brother and friends, planning to confront them, until a random touron steps in front of you, blocking your view. He must’ve already been there for awhile, as he’s clearly wasted off of his ass.
“Damn girl, where you headed to?” He slurs as you gently trying to brush past him.
“I- um- can you just let me by please?” You ask politely.
“Now hang on a minute,” He grabs your shoulders, “Just stay a minute. You know, you’re one of the hottest chicks I’ve ever seen.”
“Thank you, but I have a boyfriend. Now can you please move?” You ask again, more insistent this time.
“What a shame. Surely he’d be okay with sharing though. I mean sharing is caring, right?” He looks up and down your body hungrily, making you shiver in disgust.
“No. Get off me.”
“Don’t be so mean. I’m only trying to have fun,” He leans in so you can feel his breath on your neck. You try to squirm away but he’s clutching your shoulders so tightly that you’re stuck in place. You whimper at the pain his death grip is causing. His lips barely make contact with your skin before he’s harshly shoved off and you watch in a blur as Rafe pins him to the ground and begins to punch him repeatedly.
You blink back tears as Sarah runs up to you and wraps her arms around you comfortingly. From the other side of the fight you see your friends staring at you with wide eyes, clearly they’d just witnessed that entire thing. Rafe doesn’t stop beating on the guy and nobody really does anything to try to stop him anyway. Blood splatters the sand as he screams angrily in the boys face.
“Rafe stop! You’ll kill him!” Sarah yells finally as the guy begins coughing and choking on his on blood. She turns to you softly, so nobody but the two of you can hear, “Y/N you have to tell him to stop. He won’t listen to anybody but you.”
“R-Rafe. Baby, please stop.” You plead softly. Immediately your boyfriend stops and stands so that he’s standing over the injured touron.
“Don’t you EVER lay a hand on a woman without her consent ever again. Now leave or I will fucking kill you,” He spits, watching as the bloodied boy scrambles up off the ground and limps away.
Everyone starts going back to their partying, bored as the fight has ended. Rafe walks towards you and pulls you out of Sarah’s arms and into his own, petting your hair soothingly.
“I’m sorry you had to see that. Baby, I’m so so sorry.” He whispered comfortingly.
“It’s okay,” You tell him honestly. You were a bit shaken up but you felt so much better the second you were in Rafe’s arms.
“Y/N,” JJ says cautiously, stepping towards you.
“Look man. She’s already dealt with enough crap in one night so if you’re gonna get on her ass about being with me then just go away.” Rafe tells him but JJ shakes his head.
“No. I- uh- I came to apologize. Y/N, I’m so ashamed of how I acted. You told me that you were dating Rafe and I just, I just lost my shit. But you’re my sister and no matter what I should always support you and be there for you. These past few weeks I’ve been a horrible brother and I feel so shitty. It’s just that after years of getting the shit beaten out of me by him I didn’t want to believe that you were actually dating him. I felt a little betrayed. These past two weeks I’ve expected you to walk through the door telling me you’d made a mistake, begging for my forgiveness. I was only thinking about myself. I didn’t think about your happiness and I’m so sorry.”
“JJ I don’t know what to say. You abandoned me. You turned all my friends against me. You made me feel like a bad person for being happy.” You reply softly.
“I was angry. Anger does horrible things Y/N and I’m not proud of it but I’ll admit that I got those anger issues from Dad. I know that I can never take back how I treated you these past two weeks but I want to make it up to you. Please Y/N, I know it might take awhile but I’m willing to do whatever it takes until you forgive me.” He pleads. You’d never seen JJ Maybank beg for anything in his life until now.
“What about Rafe? I know you don’t like him and I’m not going to stop dating him.”
He turns to your boyfriend, “I still hate you...but I’ll tolerate you. Seeing how you protected my sister tonight and listening to how you talked about her the other day I know you love her. That’s all I ever wanted for Y/N, for her to be happy and loved. Maybe someday I won’t dislike you so much but for now can we just agree to get along for her sake?”
Rafe nods his head, “Happy medium?”
“Happy medium.”
Taglist (I hope I didn’t forget anybody 🥺)- @butterfliesinthenightsky @copper-boom @khiaraaa-in-spacee @n1ghtsh4d3-67 @jj-maybabe @ilovejjmaybank @starrystarkey93 @outerbanx96 @delinquentstarkey @justcallmesams @starkeysgirl @yeslifeofateen @frankiebcanon @tovvaf
302 notes · View notes
taeyongdoyoung · 4 years
Photo
Tumblr media
summary: you are a mermaid and you save a handsome man from drowning but little do you know it’s not his first rodeo when dealing with mermaids. seonghwa, a former prince, is currently hongjoong’s first mate and boyfriend. hongjoong is the captain, the pirate king of the most savage crew across the seas. and you want nothing to do with them. not because they’re pirates, but because they’re humans…
ship: mermaid!reader x prince/pirate!seonghwa x pirate!hongjoong
genre: little mermaid!au, pirate!au, romance, ANGST, fantasy
warnings: suicide mentions, murder mentions (rip ariel), depression, panic attack, threats, someone loses a hand (bc let’s be honest, it wouldn’t be a pirate story without hooks), manipulation, betrayal, kidnapping
author’s note: mingi has a cameo, i made him a huge asshole (so sorry, irl mingi), just a reminder that everything i write is completely fictional! mingi is a a total sweetheart, i just needed a villain for the story to develop lmao
word count: 3k
chapter one ☠️ chapter two ☠️ chapter three ☠️ chapter four ☠️ chapter five ☠️ chapter seven ☠️ chapter eight  ☠️chapter nine ☠️ chapter ten ☠️ chapter eleven ☠️ chapter twelve ☠️ chapter thirteen☠️ spotify playlist
You finally felt ready enough to face Seonghwa and let him explain himself. It was only fair, after all. You couldn’t take Hongjoong’s word for it, considering how he felt about you. You had to hear Seonghwa’s side of the story in order to make a proper decision. So, when you swam back to the ship all by yourself (because you didn’t want to deal with Soojin’s cheerful remarks right now), you were happy that Hongjoong wasn’t anywhere to be seen. You assumed he would drown you himself if given the chance. Luckily, you saw Yeosang nearby.
“Yeo!” you whisper-yelled. “Can you call Seonghwa for me?”
“Y/N!” Yeosang seemed surprised to see you. “I’ll get him for you rightaway.”
“Great, thanks!”
“Are you…okay?” he was obviously concerned.
“Why wouldn’t I be?” you lied, because you didn’t feel like getting into it in front of Yeosang.
“Just asking,” Yeosang replied vaguely and went to call Seonghwa.
Soon enough, you were faced with him. It had only been a week of no contact with the gorgeous man and you felt like you had missed him for an eternity. You quickly reminded yourself of the reason you’d come here. You couldn’t go easy on him.
“I need to talk to you,” you stated directly.
“I understand,” Seonghwa sighed. “What about?”
“You know what,” you observed. Judging by how guilty his pretty face looked, he knew very well. And he’d spent many sleepless nights considering it. Serves him right, you thought.
“Do you want me to deny it? Because I can’t,” Seonghwa’s voice broke. “It’s true. I knew Ariel and loved her and she died because of that. You have every right to hate me. What more can I say?”
You looked away, overwhelmed by the painful realization Hongjoong had been telling the truth. But he’d left something out, you knew it.
“Tell me the whole story,” you insisted. “You didn’t kill Ariel yourself, right?”
“Of course not!” Seonghwa cried out.
“Then give me a reason to forgive you for keeping this a secret!” you continued. You couldn’t imagine Seonghwa to be the bad guy. You just couldn’t.
“The local tales have got it all wrong,” Hwa admitted. “I was going to marry Ariel, I didn’t give a shit about that princess my parents were trying to set me up with. See, the thing is…they just couldn’t let me be happy. They bribed the sea witch into turning Ariel into sea foam. When I found out, I was so heartbroken I considering ending my own life. But I had to avenge her death, first. So, I tricked the witch into transforming her body into an exact replica of mine. Her greed was so big she really thought I was just going to hand her my kingdom on a plate. After she was done with the magic, I killed her. I made sure my parents would find the body, because I wanted them to suffer for what they’d done to Ariel. By the time I was done executing my revenge, I didn’t want to die. I knew I had to keep living. For her.”
Your eyes were welled up with tears. Seonghwa’s story was completely devastating. And looking at him now…you knew that was the whole truth. You couldn’t have it any other way. But you also couldn’t bear staying. Not yet, at least.
“Seonghwa…I appreciate you telling me all this,” you murmured. “But I’m going to need some time alone, okay? I loved Ariel, too, you know? And this is just…a lot to take in, yeah?”
Seonghwa nodded sadly.
“I’m going to respect your decision. If you want to talk again, you know where to find me, right?”
“Right. Take care, Seonghwa,” you closed your eyes and sniffed lightly.
“You too, Y/N.”
“And…Seonghwa?”
“Yeah?”
“Remember I don’t hate you. I could never hate you.”
And with that, you swam away.
☠️☠️☠️
Seonghwa’s POV
This shit hurt like hell. I thought my heart had been at its limit when I found out Ariel had been turned into sea foam. Or when I realized Hongjoong had betrayed my trust. I didn’t think it could take any more heartbreak. But here it was. Still beating despite everything I’d been through. I remembered the time I’d wanted to kill myself. Put an end to all my suffering. I felt that wish slowly returning to me. But I couldn’t imagine inflicting such pain on Y/N or my crewmates. Not even Hongjoong…Because even though he stabbed me in the back, I still cared for him deeply. I also thought about Y/N’s last words to me. She didn’t hate me. Despite all I’d had done, she couldn’t hate me. I kept repeating that to myself. She just needed some time to figure things out for herself. If she could potentially forgive me…why couldn’t I forgive myself?
“Hyung, your hands are shaking!” Yeosang interrupted my distressing thoughts all of a sudden. He grabbed them tightly. “Just, breathe, okay?”
I tried to do as he said. But I felt so numb. So weak. So…alone.
“Everything will be fine, hyung, I’m here,” Yeosang kept repeating until my hands stopped shaking. Then, he held me while I fell asleep without saying a word. I was too weak to even open my mouth. What had become of me? I needed to pull myself together.
☠️☠️☠️
In the morning, I couldn’t find Yeosang in the room. I was just about to thank him for everything he’d done for me. I was feeling a lot better and wanted to cook him some chicken to show my gratitude. When I came out of the room, I asked Wooyoung and San if they had seen him, but they said they hadn’t, which was slightly troubling. Me and Hongjoong still weren’t on speaking terms, so I didn’t bother looking for him. I would find Sangie myself. After an hour, I had searched the whole ship. And there was no trace of Yeosang. Which was extremely distressing. Where could he have gone? Without telling anyone? Not me, not even his best friend Wooyoung. Well, desperate times called for desperate measures. So, I found myself forced to reach out to Hongjoong.
“Have you seen Yeosang?” I asked him without even knocking on his door.
“Oh, so now you want to talk to me?” Hongjoong scoffed.
“I don’t want to,” I groaned. “But I’m worried about him. No one’s heard from him for the past hour. I couldn’t find him anywhere. It’s weird.”
Hongjoong put a hand on his forehead in a tired but unsurprised manner. He obviously knew something I didn’t.
“Hongjoong, where is he?”
“Set the course for Mingi’s territory, I’ll explain everything once we get Yeosang back.”
“WHAT?” I yelled, completely terrified for Yeosang’s life. “WHAT WOULD YEOSANG BE DOING IN MINGI’S TERRITORY?”
☠️☠️☠️
Yeosang’s POV
In retrospect, coming here on my own was a very bad idea. But when I woke up in the middle of the night found a note next to my pillow, saying “Come alone if you don’t want your friends to get hurt,” signed with Mingi’s name, I just couldn’t refuse the challenge. I thought I could take him down once and for all. After he’d sold us out for more treasures and a bigger ship, I wanted nothing more than to get rid of him. But I had overestimated my abilities.
“Where is my ring, Kang?” Mingi roared angrily the minute I set foot on his ship.
“What ring?” I played dumb and gave him the most innocent smile I was capable of.
“The ring you stole from me, you bastard!” Mingi hissed. “Fight with me again. Winner keeps the ring.”
“I don’t have your ring,” I admitted. How could I? I had given it to Soojin…But I would never tell Mingi that. I couldn’t risk him going after my sweet angel.
“You lost it?” Mingi screamed in frustration.
“Whatcha gonna do if I did?” I smirked mischievously. I shouldn’t have asked, damnit. Shouldn’t have provoked him.
Mingi lunged at me with his sword. I pulled out mine quickly and fought back. But fuck me, he was faster and more skilled than the last time I’d faced him. He’d been working out, too. Why did I come here again? Ah, yes, thinking it would be noble to sacrifice myself. As long as my friends were safe, right? Well, guess what, dumbass. If I died, what’s the guarantee Mingi wouldn’t come after my friends, anyways? I fought him as hard as I could but I was so tired…I hadn’t been sleeping much the last coupled of days, because I was too busy comforting Seonghwa and making sure he wasn’t going to do something stupid to himself. And now, all these sleepless nights were taking their toll on my sword performance. One moment of distraction and I would be dead. Mingi could spot my frailness and took advantage of it. So far I was managing to give as good as I get. But I knew this couldn’t last forever. I had come totally unprepared for a fight. When Mingi cut off my right hand, I could barely register what had happened. I just stared at my bleeding arm and the limp hand lying on the ground. Mingi was staring, too. He couldn’t believe what he’d just done.
“Fuck!” I screamed in pain and no sooner had I said that than Hongjoong and Seonghwa appeared from out of nowhere and attacked Mingi’s ship with guns blazing. Thank God. Then, I passed out.
☠️☠️☠️
Hongjoong’s POV
“Shh, let him rest,” I whispered to Wooyoung who was being way too loud once we had safely returned to our own ship. Recap: we took Mingi by surprise, which is why we were lucky enough to succeed in disarming him and snatch poor Yeosang away from him. Mingi had not expected us to find him so quickly but the thing is, I knew him all too well. So, locating him hadn’t been difficult. It was watching the consequences of my mistakes that was hard. Because of my softness, Yeosang had lost his hand…If only I had killed Mingi when I’d had the chance. But he used to be one of us. I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. We’d almost gotten executed by the army for being pirates because of his betrayal. And for what? More treasures? A bigger ship? Insignificant things when compared to having a purpose in life, having a family. But who was I to judge him? After all, I had been guilty of treason myself. The way I hurt Seonghwa…I could never forgive myself, even if he, by some miracle, did. I was such an incorrigible asshole.
“What happened?” I heard Yeosang’s weak voice pull me out of my self-deprecating thoughts.
“Well, for starters, you lost a hand,” I informed Yeosang, thought I doubted my input would be of much help.
“I can see that, jackass,” Yeosang rolled his eyes. “How did you get me out in time? How did you beat Mingi?”
“We were just lucky, that’s all,” I lied. I was doing an awful lot of that recently. Yeosang didn’t have to know what I’d given up in order to get there on time. It would break him. And he had already been through hell.
Yeosang narrowed his stare in suspicion, but didn’t push it.
“Where is Seonghwa?”
“He’s resting,” Wooyoung responded. “You should, too, pal, you look like shit.”
“Thanks,” Yeosang groaned sarcastically.
“Listen, Sangie…I know you probably don’t want to hear any of that right now, but this is just a reminder that we’re here for you. And this isn’t the end. You can always learn how to use a sword with your left hand and…”
“You’re right, Cap,” Yeosang cut me off. “I don’t wanna hear it.”
I nodded in understanding.
“Get some sleep, yeah? We’ll talk again…once you’re ready.”
Wooyoung gave his best friend a supportive squeeze of the arm and we left Yeosang to his own devices. He’d be okay. He was a strong one. But me? I was way past saving…
☠️☠️☠️
Seonghwa’s POV
“You promised you’d explain everything once we get Yeosang back,” I grabbed Hongjoong by the collar of his shirt. “We got him back. How did you know he would be on Mingi’s ship? And how on earth did you make the ship move so fast?”
Hongjoong closed his eyes to hide himself from me. But I wasn’t going to let him. He would tell me the truth or he would have to say goodbye to me. For good.
“Seonghwa…”
“No, Hongjoong. You will tell me everything right now or I’m walking out of here, you hear me?”
Hongjoong opened his eyes, fear evident in them.
“Where do you want me to start?”
“At the beginning.”
“But you have to listen without saying a word. Telling you all this is going to be quite difficult for me. If you have any questions, ask me after I’m done. Can you do that for me?”
I nodded.
“So…you know how Yeosang stole this really pretty ring from Mingi back when he betrayed us? But what you don’t know is that this ring was the only thing Mingi had left from his lover. Now, I don’t know her identity but whoever she was, she meant the world to Mingi. See, the problem is…Yeosang gave that ring to Soojin. And I somehow…suspected that Mingi would find out the ring was missing. That he would come looking for the ring. And I was right. It’s just a miracle we got there on time.”
I tilted my head slightly. Something didn’t add up. I didn’t trust Hongjoong’s bullshit explanation. He was keeping something from me. Again.
“You suspected it? A miracle? Do you take me for a fool, Hongjoong? What are you not telling me?”
Hongjoong bit his lower lip as if it to keep his precious secrets from spilling.
“Mingi’s lover was the sea witch you killed. The same who turned Ariel into sea foam.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I hissed angrily.
“I wish I was. A couple of hours ago when we were on his ship, Mingi confronted me about it. He said he knew she wouldn’t just disappear from him without a trace. I told him she was dead. I’d buried her body. Well, your body. ”
“Hongjoong…” I clenched my fists and gave him a warning look that was self-explanatory.
“I didn’t tell him you killed her, of course,” Hongjoong replied quickly. “But I did tell him it was mermaids who killed her,” he announced proudly. What the fuck?
“You didn’t…” I said in vain, even though I already knew he did. He was that big of a dumbass. “What if he comes after Y/N? After Soojin? They’re innocent, Hongjoong! How could you involve them like this?”
“Was I supposed to let Mingi come after you? We barely escaped him...”
I shook my head in disappointment. He was insane. Then, it hit me. He was still hiding something. Something bigger.
“How did we get there so fast?”
Hongjoong gulped nervously.
“Don’t make me…” he begged.
“Make you?” I laughed maniacally. “You dug your own grave, sweetheart.”
Hongjoong flinched as if I’d struck him. Had I gone too far? Maybe. But he started it.
“I won’t tell you,” he was adamant about it. “I’ll tell you anything else but not this.”
“Then, we’re done here,” I turned around and started walking away.
“No, Hwa, please,” Hongjoong begged and tried to take my hand but I shrugged him off.
“You don’t get to keep things like that from me, to betray my trust again and again, and then ask me to stay,” I whispered.
🧜‍♀️🧜‍♀️🧜‍♀️
Reader’s POV
“How long will it take you to forgive Seonghwa?” Soojin sighed, exasperated.
“What’s it to you? You can go see your precious boyfriend whenever you want,” you snapped at your sister.
“Yeah, but it’s way more fun when we go to our pirates together!” Soojin explained.
You laughed sarcastically.
“Since when are they our pirates? They are humans, Soojin, not property!”
“Okay, okay,” Soojin lifted her arms in the air, surrendering. “But seriously…we should go talk to them again. I have a bad feeling…I don’t know how to explain it, I just…I’m worried about Yeosang. Please?”
You agreed reluctantly.
“But if everything’s alright, I’m going back here,” you announced.
Soojin nodded excitedly. The two of you swam up. Once you reached the surface, you realized Soojin had picked an awful time to check up on Yeosang. It was too dark. And as you approached the ship, you were overwhelmed by a gnawing sensation. Soojin had been right. Something was awfully wrong. The ship seemed exactly like Hongjoong’s…And yet, there was something strange you couldn’t quite place. Did it look bigger at night? How was this possible? You had seen it at night when you’d saved Seonghwa from drowning…And it did not look like this. Had your memories deceived you? You could tell this was certainly a pirate ship. But why were you doubting it was the pirate ship you’d been looking for? What were the odds to run into other pirates in the middle of the night? You were fairly certain you could recognize Hongjoong’s ship anywhere. And yet…
“Yeosang!” Soojin started screaming mournfully. “Where are you?” You could tell by her voice that she was worried sick about her pirate boyfriend. And for a good reason.
“Shh,” you pressed your hand against your sister’s mouth. “Quiet. Something’s not right.”
She blinked at you in confusion.
“What do you mean?” she mouthed.
“I don’t know,” you mouthed back. “But before we found out, can you keep it down?”
Soojin nodded, obviously trusting your judgement. She was uncharacteristically anxious, too. Instead of her usual cheerful self, she was being very jumpy.
“Listen…let’s come back here when it’s daylight, okay?” you suggested. “I’m sure Yeosang will be fine.”
“Just let me try calling his name one more time, yeah?” Soojin murmured hopefully.
“Soojin, no!” you tried to stop her but it was already too late.
“YEOSANG!” Soojin cried out.
It was in that moment the fishnets fell upon you.
To be continued…
39 notes · View notes
Text
Liam & Edie
Liam: [a picture of Rio with her eyes crossed out like 1. Miss you and 2. Guess who I just talked to]
Edie: ofc she did 😑
Edie: what’s the damage
Liam: 0 to us I deflected the - to Lexie
Liam: do you want her framed for jumpscaring herself or is there anyone else
Edie: That’s all she cared about?
Edie: Bitch
Liam: it just didn’t take no time to convince her we’re perfect for each other
Liam: bc we are
Edie: yeah we are 🥰
Edie: surprised she copped to anything of the sort though
Edie: clearly can’t resist being nice to you
Edie: Lexie needs to calm down
Edie: 🤔 I mean, be kinda fucking hilarious if everyone reckoned she was doing it to herself
Edie: but maybe I’ve been too mean already 🥺
Edie: what do you think?
Liam: I think it’s pretty close to showing everyone her true colours if we do, Lex has gotta have been talking to your sister about me, I could tell, she thought I was a dick before I talked her round
Edie: She wouldn’t be happy for me unless you were a total 🤓 with no dick
Edie: that’s just what she’s like, crazy
Edie: but also not a stretch to see Lexie being a gossipy cow, I’ve heard her on other people before so
Edie: why would I give a fuck if her life is ruined
Liam: she basically accused me of wanting to hit you up for one reason and then wanting to immediately dip, if she thinks that’s what I’m like that’s only coming from one person
Edie: She’s pathetic
Edie: it’s clearly her saying it because you didn’t sleep with her
Edie: it wouldn’t be hard to spoof some shit, make it look like her
Edie: and she has nothing to say it was me, or you like she thought, and it weren’t no one else so she’s fucked, basically
Liam: [send her some shit that you’ve already started to work on because you knew she’d agree with this plan and the bits of the Rio convo where you said you’d try and find out and made it sound like you thought it was her but obvs it couldn’t possibly be hehe]
Edie: You’re so smart
Edie: She deserves this, she was definitely bitching about you, you can tell from how hard Rih said she weren’t
Liam: don’t be upset with me, but I was thinking about how Lexie also deserves to see us together and you happy and I invited them both to your show
Liam: you did say you want your family to take your music seriously
Edie: I’m not mad
Edie: You invited Rih too so she isn’t going to think you’re trying to get back with her
Edie: and I get to rub that and the fact I’m talented in her face?
Edie: It’s a good idea, baby
Liam: still, if you wanna create me in game and spend your time testing out different murder options, I won’t be mad, I should’ve asked you if it was a good idea before saying yeah to having us all there
Edie: [an 8-bit Liam but obvs we’re making an 8-bit us to smooch him not murder him, a lil gif moment of this or whatever it would be]
Liam: you only want a play through where we 👩🏼‍❤️‍👨🏻
Edie: that might make the thread 🤮 but idk if they’d be 😱
Liam: we’ll keep it off thread
Liam: [send her the floor plan to where your dad lives/holiday cottages so she can build it in sims like my boo would, live your dreams kids]
Edie: don’t need to make 50k nerds jealous, I get you
Edie: [just nerd out with that]
Edie: I’ll show you how generic the 👶 is
Edie: very rude
Liam: if the mods and cc don’t fix it, I’ll pretend I don’t 👀
Edie: the 👀 are already insane colours
Liam: no match for yours in real life
Edie: [pics forever]
Edie: [obviously also make your enemies to actually kill and send that]
Liam: if you sent it to Lexie nobody’d believe she created herself looking that accurate
Edie: harsh reality of a sim
Edie: the alpha CC does look like her facetune attempts, tbf
Liam: at least you can make her try to seduce the grim reaper instead of me
Edie: she’ll have ample opportunity to meet him
Edie: [all the dramatic deaths cut with her sim when they get hysterical]
Edie: I’m still mad at her
Edie: Rih blatantly thinking it was me too, not surprising but still 🖕
Edie: how’s it been today
Liam: only bc she knows how smart you are and most people who Lex hangs out with ain’t, I barely had to cover for you so she don’t really wanna think it
Edie: story of her life
Liam: how 😡 are you
Edie: it’s exhausting being mad at her, there’s nothing to do
Edie: people like Lexie, you can fuck with, or care even less than that
Liam: would it make you feel better to fuck with Lexie more
Edie: I wanna make you feel better more
Edie: you must be feeling as bored and crazy as me, if not more
Liam: if I could feel anything it’d be 💔 you’re not happy or here
Edie: is it worse
Edie: nothing
Edie: maybe that’s stupid
Edie: nothing seems preferable sometimes but only sometimes, which is maybe what takes it over feeling too much
Liam: it’s isolating, everyone expects me to feel too much, that’s acceptable, even years after
Edie: acceptance would be easier
Edie: you have me
Edie: no matter what
Edie: idc if no one else gets me, you do
Liam: I dunno what it says about people that they’d be happy if I was going round punching holes in walls but I know my ma would
Liam: she looks at me like she’s waiting for it, watching for a massive crack or something
Edie: they’ve got their reason, they want the reaction
Edie: then they can link a and b and ???
Edie: problem solved, not really
Edie: but they understand it and can wash their hands of you
Edie: that’s what they give a shit about
Liam: yeah
Edie: enough sympathy and hot meals dropped off and you’ll be ‘fixed’
Edie: you weren’t even the sick one
Liam: get enough hobbies, a part-time job, a girlfriend, move the fuck on
Edie: right
Edie: it’s so
Edie: I can’t think of the word
Liam: “she’d want you to be happy/have a life” no she fucking wouldn’t, she wanted it for herself
Edie: dead people get sainted
Edie: no room for who they actually were, better and worse
Liam: she’d hate me having any of those things just to rub in her face
Edie: what was she like, between being sick
Liam: I’ll show you
Edie: do you reckon she’d want you to remember what she’d want for you then, instead of how she was at the end
Edie: not to be like every other cunt about it
Edie: not that simple, or at all
Liam: she was a teenage girl, she’d probably want me to do more fitting in too until I’ve completed the coming of age shite milestones everyone else is, instead of telling other teenage girls from the internet how fucked up I am 😏
Edie: I think that might be a milestone so 👏
Edie: the bullshit of your sister not having her own life to live dealt with then, in this scenario
Edie: we have to find what you want
Edie: even if that’s not 🤵👧🐶🧒👰 with me
Edie: not gonna be Lexie about it, you know
Edie: I’ll still help you find it
Liam: I want you, not to be gay about it
Liam: to see where this is gonna go, how far I can take it before it ends
Edie: then let’s do it
Edie: what can I do today
Liam: what would you be doing if you could do anything
Edie: that’s the problem
Edie: I wanna be with you
Edie: but I don’t know what we’d do yet
Liam: I said I’d show you what my sister was like, the quickest way to do it is to act like nothing matters, your behaviour has no consequences
Liam: it’s not about me at all, only what you want, what’s gonna happen
Edie: and I can’t hurt you
Edie: because you don’t feel anything yet, yeah?
Liam: you can’t hurt me
Edie: you promise
Edie: do that and then we can do what I want
Liam: how do you want me to promise
Edie: 🤏🩸
Edie: mine is 📫
Liam: [brb father he’s gotta go draw some blood and put it into something she can wear as jewellery like Angelina Jolie and record the endeavour to send to the bae]
Edie: [that’s exactly what we gonna send, I know you can legit buy them so I’ll find a cool pic tah, his poor father so confusion]
Liam: [great minds boo]
Edie: kiss it better for me
Liam: [send her another video boy we’re in this deep]
Edie: god
Edie: okay, what do you do to relieve stress, let go and let off steam
Edie: do that
Liam: what do I do or what should you, bc I have an idea that I think would make you feel better about your sister
Edie: you can start by telling me what I should do because I’m intrigued
Liam: she said she’d lose it at Lexie if she did anything to you, if you lower your IQ by at least 100 you could have fun trashing her room but making it look like she did it herself to frame you, you’d have to wait til she was forced out with her family and bc there’s no check in or selfie proof everyone would just think they’re covering for her, but that’d be the only boring bit
Liam: your sister would feel bad for falling for it and believing you might be involved at all
Edie: I definitely don’t want to see her at mine ever again
Edie: I’ll do it
Edie: Bet she has a shrine to you
Liam: a curse would explain me being dead inside
Edie: she has no ✨
Edie: so whilst I’m ripping the heads off all her 🧸s
Edie: you’ve gotta do…
Liam: 🏊 the only thing there is to do
Edie: your da didn’t come prepared? 🔥🪓
Liam: he’d be prepared with a 🧯 more like but I don’t need his help 🔥🪓
Edie: you should see if anyone is around, like anywhere
Edie: see how easy it is to 👀 them without getting caught
Liam: it’s like you know me inside out
Edie: I do
Edie: I’ve got X-Ray 👀s
Liam: next time you miss me you can do an artistic rendering
Edie: of all your vital organs
Edie: not to kill the mystery and show myself up as a fake fan on the forums
Edie: but I think the outside view of you is a lot prettier 😳🥰
Liam: ok I’ll not send you any in the 📫
Edie: only the non-vitals, tah 😏
Liam: what’s left Alexis hasn’t got in her shrine
Edie: she 🥺 so hard you gave her your gallbladder
Liam: 10% risk of shitting myself side effects after it’s gone, 100% chance of that putting her off wanting to jump me, I’d do it
Edie: no need to do that now I’m here
Edie: no one is gonna wanna jump her when she’s outed as 😵🥴🤡
Liam: I’ll keep the scalpel sharp for lads who wanna get with you when they realise you’re 🤩🤓😎😇😈
Edie: I’m not complaining
Edie: I only want you around, ever
Liam: I’ll be going nowhere without you ever when I get back
Edie: Good
Edie: because I feel like
Edie: it’s like I’m doing so much to fill my time but I still just think about and miss you constantly
Liam: I’ll climb a tree and call you from the top
Edie: Describe your view the best you can
Edie: like I’m there too
Liam: facetime’ll make you feel like you are
Edie: not quite VR but I’ll take it
Edie: talking to you feels like our own 🪐 anyway
Liam: [do climb a tree and call her because what a mood just like you’re Elizabeth Allen]
Edie: [save that tree henny]
Liam: [do we wanna skip to his bday now or is there anything else you can think of that you wanna do while he’s still away?]
Edie: [hmm, we probably know the vibe, she’s busy with all the things they’re gonna continue when he’s back, also finding the first house they can break into and stay in, fucking with Lexie loads more]
Liam: [yeah and if we do think of anything specific later we can skip back it’s chill]
Edie: [let’s do it]
2 notes · View notes
lyssismagical · 4 years
Note
Hey, you know... if you ever wanted to write another Parkner glee au (bc i found the other two you wrote and I'm obsessed) I think the Bash episode in s5 would be pretty cool. If you can't swing it, that's fine. Just a suggestion but mostly good job I love what you've done with the others 💖💖💖
Glee AU #3 – Bash (S5 ep15)
{TW: Homophobia, Violence}
 Ever since they moved to Boston together, things had been relatively calm. There hadn’t been any conflicts between any of the roommates, no terrible injuries, no issues with moving out, they’d been happily enjoying the adult life.
Harley and Peter were going to MIT, MJ going to Harvard, and Ned at Tufts University.
They were living in a decently nice apartment not far from all three of their campuses, and close to where Betty, Ned’s girlfriend, was going, Yale.
It was theirs in a way that most things weren’t. They paid for it all on their own, and they were continuing to pay rent, pay their bills, and buy groceries all with their own hard-earned money.
For Harley, the best thing about the past couple months in Boston was Peter.
They’d been dating since Junior year and now they’re living together, sleeping in the same bed, going to school together, having date nights all the time.
At first, MJ had said, quiet and concerned, that she was worried this would be too much for their relationship. She’d always been observant, and it was true that they were used to a lot of time apart. Especially with Harley spending the summers in Tennessee and Peter spending most nights Spider-Manning, they’d never really spent this long together.
But their relationship flourished.
Instead of feeling claustrophobic in their relationship, they basked in the time they could spend together.
They had more arguments, but they had a lot more time to communicate their problems and work through them. They were good for each other in that way.
The peace they’d all been basking in made it so surprising when the first headline appeared before them.
A friend of a friend was in the hospital after being beaten up in an alleyway, left unconscious in the rain, simply for being gay.
Peter hadn’t been Spider-Man in months. After Mysterio the summer before and the additional stress of moving to Boston and MIT, he’d made a deal with May and Tony that he’d put Spider-Man on the backburner unless absolutely necessary.
Everybody had expected, sitting around their dining room table, newspaper laid out on the center of the table, that Peter would be swinging through the streets to bring justice.
Instead, Harley found Peter in their bed, blankets tugged over his head like he was hiding from the horrors of the world.
“You okay, darling?” Harley asks gently. He sits on the edge of the bed and waits patiently as Peter slowly pulls the blankets off his head.
“No,” he says, eyes wide and glossy. “I know Travis wasn’t the only one with that way of thinking, but I guess it felt like the world was righter after Travis had changed for the better.”
Harley silently curses himself. Of course a headline like that would bring back unwanted high school memories.
Travis Wright had bullied Peter for three years, even going as far as threatening to kill Peter after he’d kissed Peter. A year or so later, after Harley and Peter had met, Travis had found Peter again, had admitted to being gay himself, had been projecting his own internalized homophobia on Peter, and told Peter he was becoming a better person.
“I’m so sorry, honey,” Harley murmurs, tugging Peter into a hug. “I promise you, you’ll be okay. We’ll keep you safe. We can have MJ’s boyfriend bodyguard you or something. Or we could even call Happy, get a real bodyguard-”
“I’m Spider-Man, Harls, I’m my own protection. I just- I worry about you. I know you’ve always been the kind of guy to fight back and you’re strong, but these guys- they’re always stronger and I don’t want anything to happen to you.”
Harley smiles gently at his boyfriend, kissing his forehead. “Is this the perfect excuse for you to walk me to class in the morning? I wouldn’t mind riding the subway with you.”
It’s a silly kind of joke to be making in such a scary time, but Harley’s always been the kind of person to make badly timed jokes.
It does it’s job, though. Peter offers a watery smile and links their hands together.
Peter does end up walking Harley from class to class, even if it means being late for his own, and even if it means nearly losing his job when he’s late.
He’d do anything to keep Harley safe, that had never been a question.
Except for the small fact that Peter’s a busy guy. He’s always been the kind of person to fill his workload to the very brim, to never give himself even a second of spare time.
So he’s not too surprised when one of the days, he’s waiting just inside the autoshop he works at, waiting for Peter to show up, when MJ hops out of a taxi instead.
“Peter called,” she explains, looping their arms together to start their trek back to their apartment.
If anybody threatening shows up in their path, they can just pretend to be dating instead, so neither of them are very worried about anything happening. And either way, it’s only a fifteen minute walk back to the apartment.
“Did he get caught up?” Harley asks, not a hint of anger or disappointment in his voice.
“A coworker asked him to cover her shift because her sister got in an accident. You know how he is. He called me on his break, very flustered and asked if I could walk you home.”
Harley frowns. “I’m capable of taking care of myself.”
“He knows that,” she says, squeezing his arm. “He’s just protective and he worries about you, about all of us, really. He’s even had Ned being careful not to take any shady routes home after classes.”
They make it home without any problem, unsurprisingly. Ned’s sitting on their couch, video game controller in hand. Betty’s stretched across the cushions, head in her boyfriend’s lap. She’s staying the long weekend at their apartment.
Harley immediately makes his way to the kitchen to start making dinner, and he hears MJ talking to Betty and Ned in the living room.
Maybe that’s why, when the call comes, it’s such a surprise.
It’s supposed to be a domestic, sweet Friday night with the five of them, eating Harley’s homemade dinner and bickering about which movie to watch.
It’s supposed to be the kind of night where everyone turns in early from a long week of hard work, followed by a late Saturday morning breakfast of Peter’s wonderful pancakes and MJ’s expensive coffee.
It’s supposed to be followed by Saturday Dinner Potluck where Flash and Harry come to visit, and Gwen sometimes makes it out to join them, and everyone makes a bit of food to share.
That’s not how it goes.
*
It’s late and the four of them are half-asleep around the living room, not worried about their missing fifth member, unsure when he’ll make it back from his late shift.
Harley’s phone rings from the kitchen, just loud enough to heard over the Friends episode that plays on the TV, more background noise to their hushed conversations than anything.
Harley extracts himself from the couch, coaxing MJ’s legs out of his lap and Ned’s head from his shoulder, socked feet padding quietly across the hardwood to the kitchen.
“Hello?”
As soon as the news is delivered, he slips into one of the breakfast bar stools, heart pounding in his chest as he utters a quick goodbye, fingers moving to dial Harry.
Harry, living just a few hours away in his own house with his boyfriend, answers his ringing phone, assuming wrongly that it’ll be Harley confirming Saturday Potluck.
Flash stirs against his chest when Harry drops his phone in horror and surprise at the news.
Tony’s asleep when his phone rings.
Pepper and Morgan are sleeping on the couch next to him, the credits of a Disney movie rolling on the TV.
The news is told before he can even get out a greeting.
He wakes Pepper, tears already shining in his eyes.
May’s working a night shift when she gets the call. It’s late and the worry spikes faster than imaginable. She’s gotten too many late night calls from any of the kids to know what it means.
The news still makes tears spring to her eyes and her knees go weak.
Harley’s been pacing the waiting room for nearly two hours by the time Harry and Flash burst through the doors, faces echoing Harley’s panic.
“Is he okay? What happened?” Flash demands, hands trembling as he grabs Harry’s and squeezes tight.
Harley opens his mouth to explain the story he got from the man who talked to them earlier, but nothing comes out.
“There’s been a few attacks recently,” MJ says, materializing at his side, hand on his shoulder. “A group of people who aren’t happy with the positive changes with gay rights who’ve been targeting people. I guess… There was this guy, Charlie, who was getting attacked in an alleyway, and- you know Peter. He’s never been the kind of person to stand by while someone else is in trouble.”
“Is he going to be okay?” Harry asks, paling when Harley and MJ are quiet for too long.
Harley swallows thickly. “He should be. He’s got Spider-Man on his side, and Charlie called the cops as soon as he got away. But the group, one of them pulled a gun.”
The boyfriends sink into a set of chairs across from them, knuckles white where they hold hands.
“But is going to be okay?” Flash’s voice is shaking almost as badly as his hands. “This isn’t even close to the first time he’s been shot.”
Before Harley can give an answer, not that he can really think of anything good to say, a nurse comes out of Peter’s room.
“Parker family?”
They must look like a strange bunch. Harley, MJ, Betty, Ned, Harry, and Flash, but the nurse barely even blinks when they turn to her.
“Is he going to be okay?” Flash repeats.
The nurse smiles. Not one of those plain and sad, sympathetic smiles, the kind of smiles that Harley was given when he was told his dad was never coming back. The kind of smiles that he was given when the principal at his first school told him there was nothing he could do about cruel words.
It’s not that.
It’s a genuine, good news smile.
“Yeah, he’s going to be just fine. His body’s still working through the anesthetics from the surgery, but everything went well and he’s all patched up. You can go in to see him, but I’d recommend not crowding his room when he wakes up.”
All eyes immediately turn to Harley. He’s Peter’s boyfriend, he’s not exactly sure if that takes priority over best friends, but he understands that they’re giving him the opportunity to see Peter first and his heart warms.
He nods quickly, thanking the nurse as quick as his clumsy tongue will let him, and his shoulders finally relax.
“He’s in room 248 whenever you’re ready.”
The nurse smiles once more before she heads back down the hallway she came from.
“Are you sure?” Harley asks when the two couples sit down again.
MJ smiles, patting at his shoulder. “Go see him. Come get us when you’re ready to. We’ll all be okay waiting for a little while longer.”
That’s all the reassurance he needs before he hurries down the hallway, awkwardly trying not to sprint, but desperate to see his boyfriend as quickly as he can.
He barely manages to slow himself when he bursts into Peter’s hospital room, eyes wide and burning with tears.
This is the one downside with being in love with Peter Parker.
Having to get used to seeing his loved one in a hospital bed too often, even if it’s never for very long. With Peter’s enhanced healing, he’s never been in the hospital for more than a couple days, but it also makes him think he’s invincible and jump into fights without a second thought.
Even now, in a scenario where Peter was supposed to be walking home from a shift at work, where he was supposed to join them in their living room, maybe offer to crack open a bottle of wine for them, snuggle up against Harley’s side.
Even then, Peter ended up in the hospital.
How much is the world going to throw at him for simple existing? How unfair is the universe for throwing this at him too?
Harley finally moves, eyes unable to stop staring at the cuts and bruises that litter his love’s pale skin.
He carefully slides into the space next to Peter in the bed, tears burning at his eyes as he gently presses a kiss to Peter’s temple.
“Nothing’s going to harm you, not while I’m around,” he promises.
He presses his nose against Peter’s neck, tucking his head in the crook of Peter’s shoulder, and he tries not to make it too obvious when the tears fall.
*
Harley jerks awake when he feels a kiss to his cheek.
His eyes dart around the room, remembering where he is and why, and the pain sparks in his chest, nothing physical but something so deeply emotional because his Peter was hurt.
“Hi,” Peter says, squinting up at Harley. His cuts have mostly healed, red lines left in their wake. The bruises have gone from the scary hues of black and purple down to softer yellows and greens. He’s half-smiling but there’s something awfully wrong about it.
“Are you feeling okay?” Harley asks, immediately regretting the words. “I mean, obviously you’re not, but I just- I don’t know-”
Peter winces and he rests his mouth against Harley’s jaw for a long moment to compose himself.
Eventually, he sighs and says, “I’ve been shot before and this isn’t my first being beaten up, that’s for sure. It’s not even my first time being beaten up for being bisexual. That was pretty much my whole junior year.”
Harley nods silently, gently threading his fingers through Peter’s hair. They’re close enough together, squished up in the hospital bed, that Harley can see the flush of Peter’s cheeks and the tears that pool in his eyes.
“But this felt so different. Travis, at least he knew me, right? He was never going to kill me, despite the threats he made. He was just a scared kid, you know? Those people, they saw a guy with a rainbow pin on his bag, and they wanted to kill him. They saw me protecting him, and they wanted to kill me too. That’s not- That’s not right.”
“It’s not,” Harley agrees because he isn’t sure what else he’s supposed to say. “I know, but Charlie, the guy you saved, he gave a full statement to the police, and it should be enough to track those people down and have them arrested.”
Peter sniffles, chin wobbling. “I’ve just never been that scared before. I was so worried for you that I wasn’t even thinking about me when I was walking home that night. I thought- I guess I thought I’d be okay because I’m Spider-Man. But I wasn’t Spider-Man.”
“I’m so sorry,” Harley says. He kisses his boyfriend’s forehead, grabbing his hand and threading their fingers together. Peter’s knuckles are busted, blood still staining his fingers.
*
Peter’s released from the hospital that night.
He’s still weak and beyond tired, but he throws on a brave smile as Harley helps him up and into the sweatpants and t-shirt MJ brought for them.
Harley hails them a taxi and he never lets go of Peter’s hand for the whole trip home.
“You okay?” Harley asks for the thousandth time when they reach their apartment door.
“I love you,” Peter says instead, kissing Harley before he smiles. “I’m good, I’m alright.”
Harley opens the door and leads Peter into the apartment.
The dining room, kitchen, and living room are all filled with people.
May, Gwen, Tony, Pepper, and Morgan made the four hour road trip to Boston. Harry, Flash, and Betty are still hanging around. Ned and MJ are setting the dining room table. Abbie and Macy got the nearest flight from Tennessee.
There’s food laid out across the table and MJ spots them first, lighting up in a smile.
“Saturday Night Potluck,” she explains, jogging over to pull Peter into a tight hug. “Don’t you ever do that to me again, you hear me?”
“No promises,” Peter says, but he’s smiling brightly and he looks so much younger, worry lines smoothing out and the nicks and faded bruises look more like tricks of the light, not a traumatic experience painted so much deeper than his skin.
Tony’s there next, but he doesn’t take it as well. “Are you kidding me, Parker?”
Harley can tell the anger comes from the right place, and he rolls his eyes. “You couldn’t wait even one day to reprimand him?”
“Was I stupid to think you’d be safe here?” Tony demands, completely ignoring Harley. “Was it stupid of me to think that sending you off to University would mean you’d be safe? What were you thinking, Parker? What if they’d all had guns, huh? What if- They could’ve killed you.”
“I know.” The smile’s faded from his face and it makes Harley want to punch Tony. “But I’ve been dealing with these kinds of people for as long as I can remember. I’ve got my healing, Tony. I can’t just stand by when things like this happens.”
Tony’s expression crumples and he tugs Peter into his arms. “Please, for the sake of my old heart, please don’t do anything like that again. I can’t handle getting anymore calls like that, okay?”
Peter squeezes Tony, but doesn’t bother making that promise.
Everyone knows, all too well, that Peter’s guilt complex mixed with his heroic compassion, he’d never be able to give up helping people. It’s just what he does.
“Saturday Night Potluck!” Ned calls out, arms spread wide to show off the arrangement of too many lawn chairs around their much too small table, covered in different dishes and foods. “Come eat!”
Harley smiles and wraps an arm protectively around Peter’s waist to lead him to the table.
Life is about weighing the good with the bad, and Peter, despite having been through so much bad, still has plenty of good constantly surrounding him.
He has his strange, inexplicable family. He has Saturday Night Potlucks and Friday movie nights. He has this.
Harley squeezes his hand.
He’s still here, still standing, still going to view the world in the same optimistic, hopeful way that he always has despite everything that’s told him not to, still going to stand strong and brave, still going to stand up for what he believes in despite the consequences he might face, still going love because love is enough to conquer hate.
He’s still here.
Taglist: @littlemissagrafina  @spideygirl2003 @romeoandjulietyouwish @c-artara @shadedrose01 @likeaphoenix13 @pj-hermes-tonystark-obsessed @you-get-killed-walk-it-off @kitkatwinchester  @emo-girl10  
87 notes · View notes
hollowisthyname · 3 years
Note
🖊 Onyx!
I am. so sorry. I have been writing this for over a month at this point I think?? I've got a lot on this character but I'm not good at writing it down, so..... ah. yeah :') hopefully I got enough in this to justify the wait, but either way let's go!!
[as per usual, infodump under the cut]
TW // brief mention of suicide in the paragraph where I explain how they died, mentions of death throughout (ghost character, kinda hard to avoid)
Onyx Hart: ghost, performer, and excessive flirt. they are extremely fun to make up stuff about, especially bc they're one of my only extroverted characters. I have so so many ideas for them and they're one half of the third "cannon" pair of characters ("pair" meaning they have backstory together and I associate them with each other so it's easier just to think of the two of them as their own little group. the other two are Marcel and Sorrel, and Cory and Rhys).
they have black hair that goes down to a little above their shoulders and then flips out (think Kokichi, but slightly less drastic), and the.... sides? of their hair, like the parts that go in front of your ears or something, are much longer than the rest of it, about to the middle of their chest. their skin is v pale bc they're kinda anemic and don't spend much time in the sun, and their eyes are really bright green and reflective like a cat's. they've got freckles across the bridge of their nose and they kinda glow. I don't have all the details of their outfit worked out yet (bc I just changed it a bunch ehehe) but their general style is v punk. ripped denim stuff, chokers, pins, etc. they wear mostly dark colors but with bright accents, it's extremely cool :] the kinds of clothes they wear for performances are..... very different. their color palate for shows is black and gold, and they wear a lot of flowy stuff- silks and whatever makes them look extra cool flying through the air like they do. it's definitely fun to watch, but they're actually pretty hard to get around in. Onyx is not a fan.
so. ah. for all I've thought about this character, I don't actually have a backstory for them fully formed or written out at all. I know some basics- performing has always been a big part of their life, of course, but the reasoning for that varies. they come from a family of acrobats, they ran away and joined the circus, they were recruited by Lavka very young..... so many possibilities. so instead of trying to decide on one now, let's skip to the part I know more about!! enter Lavka, the ringmaster :D
very brief explanation of Lavka: fallen angel/deity, amnesia, still powerful and malicious enough that he decides to create a.... what do I even call it? magic circus thing??? and it traps people or he kills them or something. it's bad but very cool. think of him as like, a siren, but tall and with a lot more eyes.
the thing about a circus is, you need acts. and Onyx is the star of the show. Lavka went around recruiting people to work for him and thought they'd make a good central act. they were great, and the two of them worked together for a while. aaaaand.... that's as far as I've gotten :') I have virtually no concrete story for them, and seeing as the thing that would probably prompt them to leave the circus is meeting another of my characters and I've been avoiding deciding anything for that..... yeah.
it's the same thing for how, exactly, they became a ghost. they died by suicide during a performance, but I don't know when, how, or why. gotta work on that but I'm awful at backstory and I can't always think abt it without triggering myself :') I think my brain lets me create either a personality or a backstory for a character and. not both hgdf
however!! this brings us to their personality, which I somehow completely forgot to do earlier even though I've come up with much more for it than the backstory!!!! I said extrovert and flirt already, but I don't think that encompasses just how good they are at talking to people. hardly anyone could work a crowd the way they do- Lavka and Marcel can both be good with people as well, but they all do it in very different ways. Marcel becomes whoever people want them to. Lavka radiates power and charisma. and Onyx is just impossible to look away from- they're always doing something, and it's always flashy and spectacular and amazing to see. even when they're not performing, there's just something kinda irresistible about them. they're also a very good liar, which- esp when combined with Marcel's ability to completely change how they act at the drop of a hat- has gotten them into some. situations (it's gotten them out of them too, though, so it kinda evens out) Onyx is the kind of person who will push themself past their limits to keep up appearances and please everyone. and once they can't take it anymore, they completely shut down. they'll shut themself off from everything and everyone until they have the energy to go back to acting the way they always do in front of people. usually when this happens they go completely nonverbal, and are very easily overwhelmed. it's a stark contrast from how they usually act, and they only trust a handful of people enough to actually interact with them when they shut down. most of the time around people they're constantly being charming and performance-y, but when they're just with close friends they chill out some. they're still p energetic most of the time, and they love pulling pranks on.... everyone (especially Elis, and Cory's their partner in crime for pranks) but they're not trying to make everyone love them all the time. they have HEAPS of anxiety btw, they might be great with people but that doesn't stop them from worrying that no one likes them. they're very much a people-pleaser and have trouble saying no and setting boundaries, but at the same time they have no problem with confronting someone they don't like or who hurt anyone they care about. (it seems contradictory but it's not I promise)
and then we have their whole story with Everest. I think I explained this before but I'm not sure and you've probably forgotten by now, so basically: I came up with an Onyx-centric "au" where Onyx is one of two humans from a human world to get transported into a magical one. and from that came Everest, complete opposite to Onyx and their best friend. Everest is also mostly not included in my main story bc he's my newest character and I don't have as much about him, but he's cool and I love their whole opposites-attract dynamic. I really don't have any more backstory for this version than I do for the main one, and I'm kinda wavering between the two of them running away and getting transported together, or them not knowing each other before getting sent to the magic world but ending up in the same place and becoming friends. anyway that whole thing is kinda confusing but v fun!!
now it's time for a list of facts that don't need whole paragraphs!!
- Onyx knows sign language p well bc of going nonverbal a lot (they all have to so they can talk w Rhys effectively, this is my explanation for them lmao) - they really want to perform with Elis (they have wings, great for acrobatics stuff) but Elis absolutely hates the idea - I originally came up with them for a. wattpad applyfic. absolutely fucking amazing reason I know - they're just transparent enough that it's kinda unnerving but you wouldn't really know why unless you knew what you were looking for - various other species ideas for them are selkie and nine-tailed-fox spirit - Onyx's pronouns are actually they/it and a lot of neopronouns but I usually just use they/them bc I either forget or worry abt being judged (for absolutely no reason lmao)
Tumblr media
a moodboard I made for them!! I need to remake it bc I figured out how to make them better but I still really like how this one looks :D
1 note · View note
Text
Not a Ninja (A+S) Neji x Reader
Tumblr media
Okie doke. Here we go. Chapter 1 of this book. This is actually my first ever Naruto oneshot ever, so don't judge too much hehe. Smutty-Chan returns in this one bc she helped me with coming up with some of this one.  Let's get on with it so yall can get your daily dose of Neji. (We're gonna make the reader and Neji 16 in this one, which is lowkey young for a smut fic, but oh well.  Then Naruto and Sasuke are 12 here, bc whatever) This one is also a pretty long story (7233 fucking words (including A/N and shit) I am so fucking sorry) because I went too far with the backstory before you get to interact with Neji bc Im an annoying bitch, but whatever I hope you read and enjoy anyways! :))
   You sat on the roof of your house, waiting for your friends to get home from training for the day.  You hated not going to train with them, but that's just the way it was.  Finally, you see the blonde haired boy running down the street towards you, a raven haired boy trailing him.
   "Y/N! Guess what!" Naruto yells at you as you jumps down from the roof landing in front of him.    "What is it?" you question, wondering what had him so excited.    "I passed Kakashi's test, I'm gonna be a ninja. Believe it!"    You knew Kakashi.  He had actually taken you under his wing.  He knew you needed it. Someone to look up to and trust.  He served as a big brother and without him, you'd probably be dead.  Knowing Kakashi, you knew what his test was.  He could be a little tough on his students which makes you worry for Naruto, but you know Naruto needed the discipline.    "I'm glad you guys passed," you said as Sasuke finally caught up, "I didn't wanna have to slap Kakashi for failing you.    You and Naruto laughed, and Sasuke even broke a smile.    "Kakashi would kick your ass," Sasuke teased you.    "Yes, I could, but I would never," Kakashi says, standing on the roof where you previously sat.    "You're gonna give someone a heart attack doing that one day," you looked up at Kakashi.    "Shut it. I actually came to tell you that your parents left for a mission earlier. Didn't know if they told you or not."    "As if they'd tell me anything," you scoff and turn around as Kakashi jumps down next to the three of you.    "I'm sorry, kid, I'm sure they were just busy."    You knew Kakashi was only being nice.  He was usually tough on you, but when it came to your parents, he knew that being hard on you would be worse and push you away.    "Yeah, sure," you knew they left without telling you because they didn't care.    "Well, I've gotta go, I have to meet someone for ramen," Kakashi said, jumping to the roof again before leaving.    You smirked, knowing he was going to go meet Iruka. Even though they'd been dating for quite sometime and they both came out a while ago, Kakashi still got all awkward when he mentioned dating Iruka.    "Y/N, I'm sorry they left without saying goodbye," Naruto comforts.    "It's fine, I could care less at this point," you shake your head as Sasuke puts a hand on your shoulder, attempting to comfort you.    You know you shouldn't complain.  So many people don't even have parents. Like Iruka, Naruto and Sasuke, for example.  You rly didn't have parents in the typical sense, though.  They were usually gone or just ignored you.  They had two reasons.  One being that you were friends with Naruto.  They were pissed because they hated him like everyone else.  You, on the other hand, saw him as human and took him in as a little brother type person.  They hated that.  The second reason was because you didn't inherit the kekkei genkai.  This also caused them to keep you from enrolling in the academy.  They thought you'd never be good enough without it.  Your brother inherited it, though.  He was nicer to you than your parents, but he was typically out on missions and official business.    He was the best thing you had.  Until he passed when the nine tails attacked.  This is another reason you didn't hate Naruto.  You wanted to show other people who lost loved ones that day that Naruto wasn't the monster they said he was.  You visited the memorial everyday, which is where you met Kakashi.  He reminded you of your brother, but he was even kinder to you, and always made time for you.  Something your brother never did.  This is why Kakashi was one of your two favorite people to look up to. The other, of course, was Iruka, who was always a kind, respectful, and loyal.  Three qualities you always found important.    "It's fine, guys, really, don't worry about me," you let them off with a small laugh.  You knew it didn't fully convince them, but it made them sure enough that they could leave to train some more.    All of a sudden, Kakashi showed up again.    "Y/n," Kakashi spoke from the roof.    You jumped up to join him.    "Were you here waiting?"    "No, I actually made it all the way to the ramen shop and sat down with Iruka before I realized I forgot to tell you something," Kakashi admitted, rubbing his neck.    "Well, then what did you forget to tell me?" you laughed at what a dork he was when nobody else was around. You were really lucky to have him.    "Your parents told me to let you know that you're going to be staying at the Hyuga's while they're gone."    "Well fuck my life."    "First off, watch the language," he scolded you like he was your parent. He basically was though, "Second, what's wrong?"    He sat down, his legs dangling off the edge of the building. You sat next to him, copying his sitting position, your legs swinging over the edge.    "You know I'm 16, right? I can cuss if I wanna," you pouted.    "Yeah, yeah, I just don't like you growing up so damn fast," he sighed, "Now what's wrong?"    "I hate the Hyuga's son. Well I don't hate him, really. He's a great ninja, strong and smart.  I want to be like that. But, he always looks down on me because I'm not a ninja."    "Well, you're just as strong as any ninja. I've been training you like I would any ninja.  While your parents didn't put you in the academy to be an official ninja of the hidden leaf, you're still one of the strongest people I know. Even without the kekkei genkai of your family."    "Really? You think so?"    "Of course I do," Kakashi reached out a hand to ruffle your hair, "You're a very strong young woman, and an even stronger ninja."    "Thank you, Kashi, it means a lot coming from you," you send him a gentle smile.    "There you two are," Iruka sighs as he looks up at you from the street.    "Why don't you join us?" you yell down.    Iruka then jumps to join the two of you on the roof.  He sits down next to you on the side opposite Kakashi.    "I heard a little of what you were saying," Iruka admitted.    You expected a lecture on how you shouldn't doubt yourself.  You weren't too far off.    "You're an excellent fighter.  In my mind, I consider you a ninja.  I call you a ninja when I talk to others about your strength.  You doubt yourself because you don't have a headband.  That's no reason to doubt yourself, you know?" Iruka put an arm around your shoulders, pulling you closer and into a side hug.  You let your own arm slide around his middle, hugging him closer.    "I'm glad I have you two," you spoke to the two ninja sitting next to you, "Before you guys, I had nobody. I was completely alone.  I wanted to kill myself.  Then you two showed up and gave me hope.  Thank you for that."    Tears were now spilling from your eyes as you shoved your face into Iruka's vest.  You squeezed him even tighter, but not too tight, you didn't wanna hurt the poor guy.    "Sorry," you spoke as you pulled away and wiped you eyes, "Ninja don't cry."    Then you looked up to see Iruka sporting some teary eyes of his own, then to Kakashi who had no tears, but had a look on his face to show you that your words definitely had an impact.    "I'm so glad you didn't," Kakashi broke the silence, pulling you into another tight hug.    He then let go, allowing you to just sit there with them.   The three of you sat there in a comfortable silence for a while before you realized something.    "Hey Kakashi?"    "Yeah, kid?" he responded.    "If my parents told you to tell me that I'd be staying with the Hyuga's, then they weren't just caught up in something.  They purposely left without saying goodbye. They just chose to leave me here without saying goodbye."    Nobody spoke.  You knew Kakashi probably felt bad.    "I dont blame either of you for that.  They just hate me, nobody can change that.  I wish they'd just put me up for adoption. I mean, at least then I wouldn't deal with them."    "Well, I'd adopt you," Iruka chuckled as he ruffled your hair.    With these two constantly ruffling your hair, you had no idea how you kept it neat.    "I wish you could, then it'd be like a real family.  The three of us."    "Yeah, that would be nice, wouldn't it," Iruka agreed.    "I wouldn't exactly mind either," Kakashi also agreed, scooting over and pulling the two of you into a group hug.    You sat like that for a moment before Kakashi released the hug.    "You should get to the Hyuga's before it's too late," Kakashi said, standing and pulling you up with him.    "But Kashiiii," you whined, leaning on the silver haired ninja, "Can't I just stay with you?"    "Sorry kiddo, I've gotta talk to the hokage, then I'm off for a mission with Iruka," Kakashi sounded guilty.    "Well, I'd better get to the Hyuga's before it gets too late," you said, repeating what Kakashi said a minute earlier.    "I'll come with you," Iruka said, standing himself, "Then I'll meet Kakashi at the gate for our mission.    "Sounds good to me, Ruka," you said with a small smile.    Kakashi nodded and hugged you again with a kiss to your forehead before he leapt away towards the hokage's office.     "Shall we?" Iruka asked, offering a hand.    "We shall," you laughed, taking his hand.    The two of you jumped off the roof, heading toward the Hyuga's.    "I'm really glad that you and Kakashi are together.  I think you make him really happy," you told the man walking next to you as you could see the Hyuga's in the distance.    "You think so? I'm glad," the male said with a small blush at the mention of Kakashi.    "I think that you make him happier everyday. I've definitely noticed a change in him since you guys started dating," you smiled.    "Well thank god.  I've actually been thinking of proposing," Iruka said quietly.    "OH MY FUCKING GOODNESS YES!" you yelled.    "Y/N! Quiet! And doesn't Kakashi always tell you to watch your language?"    "Well, yeah, but I don't see Kakashi anywhere, do you?"    "I do," Kakashi said from behind you causing your eyes to go wide.    "I though you were going to the hokage," you spoke.    "Ended early, so I thought I'd catch up with you guys," he shrugged.    "What? No lecture about cussing?" you joked.    "Well, you said it yourself, you're 16, you can say whatever you want."    "Really?" You were surprised that he didn't lecture you.    "No. Now stop cussing, you're too young," Kakashi deadpanned.    "Rude," you huffed.    "Now, let's get you to the Hyuga's," Kakashi walked closer, grabbing Iruka's hand, which made the younger man blush.    "Whatever, sure. But I'm still not happy about staying there."    "Oh come on, it won't be THAT bad," Iruka told you.    "Hey Iruka, can I talk to you for a minute?"    "Sure, go ahead," Iruka said still walking.    "No I mean.  Well how do I put this? Love ya, Kashi, really do, but this is more of an Iruka and Y/N conversation," you spoke, looking at the ground.    "Okay, I'll wait here," Kakashi dropped Iruka's hand.    Iruka walked towards you as you left to stand far enough away that you were out of Kakashi's earshot.    "What's up kiddo?" Iruka said.    "Well you know one reason I don't wanna stay with the Hyuga's," you spoke quietly, just in case Kakashi might hear.    "Right, you don't like Neji because he talks down on you," he nodded, signaling you to continue.    "Well there's another reason," you spoke, a small blush growing.    "Which is?" Iruka waited for you to respond.    "Well, I may, or may not, have a small, and by small I mean huge, crush on him too," you spoke quickly, hating what you had just admitted.     "So you hate Neji?" you nodded, "But you have a crush on Neji?" you nodded again.    "Yep, that's the problem."    "Well, why do you like him?"    "I really like that he's a strong and intelligent ninja.  He's very good at whatever he does and he seems as if he'd be loyal.  Not to mention his looks, I mea-" Iruka cut you off.    "I do not need to hear you thirst over how cute you think a boy is, y/n, you're like my little sister, and I'm not sure my heart can take it," Iruka explained.    You giggled at the actions of the older man.    "Anyways, why do you not like him?"    "Well, he always reminds me that I'm not a ninja, and I can't stand it.  He reminds me of the kind of ninja I want to be, but never will."    "Maybe talk to him about it.  Tell him what's up.  Or you show him your stuff and maybe he'll back the hell off," Iruka spoke sternly.    "Wow, Ruka, getting a little heated, bud."    "I don't like when people look down on you because you don't have a headband.  You could probably kick most of their asses.  I hope you do one day."    "Okay, calm down, I'll figure it out," you pulled him into a hug, "Let's get back to Kakashi so we can leave.    "You're right, I was told that you had to be there by three, and it's already 2:30."    "Ready?" Kakashi asked as you walked back over.    "Yup,"you said, already beginning to walk.    You saw Iruka send a worried looking Kakashi a reassuring smile.  You guessed it was a silent promise that you were fine.    It seemed like you shouldn't be here yet, but time passed so quickly as you joked with Iruka and Kakashi.  Yet here you were, standing at the Hyuga's door.    "Well, kid, here we are," Kakashi spoke.    "Yeah I know," you deadpan.    Kakashi reached forward and knocked on the door.  Hiashi answered the door.    "Y/N, hello," he greeted you with a surprising warmth.    "Hi," you spoke quietly.    You turned to say goodbye to Iruka and Kakashi.  You hugged them both, allowing them to give you a kiss on the forehead.  You waved goodbye as they left.    You then turned back around to face Hiashi.    "Come in, y/n, make yourself at home," he smiled at you.    You really didn't peg him as a kind type, you assumed he'd be harsh and cold to you.  Maybe it was because you were the child of his closest friend, your father.    "Thank you, sir," you bowed before entering the house.    "Just call me Hiashi," he told you before closing the door behind you.    "Is that Y/n?" a woman called from the kitchen.    As you walked towards the voice, you found a woman who you assumed to be his wife.    "That's me," you laughed.    "Welcome, y/n, would you like something to eat, I just set out some snacks here, you're welcome to have some," she smiled kindly.    Then Neji walked in. Well shit.    You grabbed the first thing you saw without knowing what it was before thanking her and running off to find somewhere to sit outside.    As you finally sat down on a bench outside, you took a look at whatever snack you had grabbed.  It was a carrot. A whole ass carrot.  Not even like a baby carrot.      "Is that a carrot?" you hear a familiar voice ask from behind you.    "I think it's a carrot, I don't know much about carrots," you said in a mocking voice, making sure the sarcasm showed, "Just because I'm not a ninja doesn't mean I'm fucking stupid. I know what a carrot it, Neji."    "Yeah, whatever, I just wondered why when you had a whole plate of snacks to choose from, you chose the carrot that was about to be chopped for dinner."    Shit, of course you grabbed the one thing that wasn't on the fucking snack tray.    "Well, did you ever think I just like carrots?" you shrugged it off.    "I just didn't think you ate anything other than ramen with Naruto," he spoke.    "Who said I was gonna eat it?" you winked at the boy now standing in front of you.    Now, of course, you weren't gonna do anything dirty with the carrot.  That is just downright unsanitary.  Probably would cause an infection.  But you liked to tease people.  Making people uncomfortable was something you enjoyed.    He'd never admit it, but Neji's cheeks now sported a light dusting of blush due to your comment.    "Y/N, that is inappropriate," he spoke, turning away.    "Oh, come on, I'm not actually gonna fuck a carrot, Neji."    "Y/N, that still isn't appropriate," he said again.    "Well, a lot of things I say aren't appropriate, but here we are," you laughed.  Neji was your favorite person to annoy.    "Is this what you do with your time? Come up with stupid jokes to annoy people?  Is that what you do instead of training to become a ninja?"    "Neji, shut it, I've had enough. I can't stand to stay the night in the same vicinity as you while my parents are away. I'm going to ask Hiashi if I can just stay at my house instead."    "I can agree with that, I'll even help you convince him."    The two of you walked back to the house in silence.    "Excuse me, Hiashi?" you spoke to the man standing in the kitchen with his wife.    "Yes, Y/N?"    "I was wondering if I could go stay at my house while my parents are gone. I'll still come to check in with you and let you know I'm alright.  I just feel more comfortable in my own house," you spoke, nervous because he may say no.    "I agree with Y/N, she told me her feelings on the situation, and I see where she's coming from," Neji spoke up.    "I'm not so sure, I'm supposed to watch you, you're my responsibility, after all," he spoke, unsure.    "I still think you should allow her to go home if she feels she should," Neji fought for you to leave.    "Well, if you really want her to stay at her home, then you go stay with her, that way she won't be alone," Hiashi spoke towards Neji.    "I really don't think that's necessary-" Neji began.    "Too late, I've made up my mind," Hiashi spoke, "Go get your things for the next few days to accompany Y/N while her parents are gone.    "Alright," Neji walked away.    "Thank you, Hiashi," you bowed, then turning to walk to the door.    "Of course, Y/N, be careful and check in with me frequently," he told you.    "Yes sir," you walked out the door.    A few moments later, the door opened and Neji walked out with a bag of what you assumed was clothes.    You walked in silence with a grumpy Neji.    "You know I'm not too happy about this either. I didn't think he'd make you come with me."    "Whatever, too late now, let's just hurry up so it can be over," Neji spoke calmly.    It was going to be a very rough time for you.    The two of you arrived at your home.  You showed Neji to a guest room and left him to go cook dinner.  You made a simple ramen dish for the two of you, calling Neji down for dinner.    "There's your dinner, hope you like it," you said, putting the dish in front of the ninja sitting at the table.    You left to grab your own dish and two glasses of water before sitting down across from Neji and starting to eat.    "Thank you for the food, Y/N," Neji said, finishing his food and standing up to take his dishes to the kitchen.      You stopped him, now done with your own food.    "I'll get the dishes. You are my guest after all," you said with a fake smile, "You just go up and get some sleep, I'll clean."    He looked as if he were going to disagree, but shut his mouth and left anyways.    You finished cleaning and went to check if Neji needed anything before I went to bed myself.  When I knocked on his door, I got no response, so I assumed he was asleep.    You then went to your own room and got ready to go to bed, stripping to nothing but a pair of underwear and a tank top.    You laid in bed forever, tossing and turning. Not being able to sleep sucked.  Finally, after a struggle, you fell asleep.    After sleeping for a while, you woke up with a certain feeling in between your legs.  Your mind just loved having some wet dreams and leaving you to wake up feeling some kinda way.    You decided to glance at the clock, wondering if you could do what you wanted without being woken up by Neji.  You saw that it was 12:00 am.  Well, Neji would be asleep, so you figured it would be fine.    You took your hand and slid it down your body to the bottom of your tank top before pulling it over your head and throwing it across the room to the dirty clothes basket.    You then let your hand wander across your exposed skin, landing on your chest and playing with your boobs.  After teasing yourself for a while, you finally slid your hand down to where you needed it most.  You played with the waistband of your underwear, allowing yourself to pull them down your legs and off of you completely.    You took your hand and started just rubbing your fingers up and down, feeling how turned on you were.  This caused you to let out a small moan. Jesus, you had barely even touched yourself and you were already moaning.    Then you heard a knock on your door.  Shit. It was obviously gonna be Neji, he was the only person here.    You quickly covered yourself with your blankets and told him to come in.    The door opened, revealing a shirtless Neji. Oh dear god, now that you've seen him shirtless, your crush is never gonna go away.  He probably doesn't wear a shirt to bed.  You found yourself picturing his chest against yours as he pulled you in for a kiss.    Neji gained you focus by speaking.    "I thought that I heard a loud bang like someone fell, so I thought I'd come check on you."    "Oh, I heard it too, it was just the neighbor, he comes home drunk sometimes and falls on his face when he reaches his porch."    "Oh, okay."    He was about to leave and close the door when he stopped and looked back up at you.    "Are you alright, you're really flushed?" He asked, sounding genuinely concerned.    "Oh, uh yeah, I'm fine," you prayed he didn't notice your underwear on the floor.  You also hoped that if he did notice the underwear, that he didn't notice that they were fucking soaked.    As if the universe was just telling him everything you didn't want him to see, he looked down and noticed your underwear. His eyes darted from you to the underwear and back to you.    "Oh, I see why you're flushed," Neji smirked at you. He actually did something other than frown at you.  You though to yourself that you may die from seeing that damn smirk.    "It's not what it looks like," you tried to save yourself.    "Really? It isn't?" He spoke as he stepped in the room and shut the door, "because I think I know exactly what it is."    He took slow steps to your bed.  Almost teasing you.    "Nope, definitely isn't what you think," you knew this was a lost cause, but you weren't gonna give up so easily.    "Well, then, if you weren't doing what I assume you were, then lift up the blanket," he crossed his arms across his chest, the smirk still resting on his face.    "Well, I guess you've got me there, I can't lift up the blanket," you admitted to the boy in front of you.    "Well, you could always lift the blanket anyways," he took a few steps closer, eventually reaching the bed and sitting down beside you.    "What?"    "I said, you could always lift the blanket anyways.  If you don't want to, you don't have to, and I'll leave and we can ignore this, but I'd be just fine if you did lift it," he winked at you.  He was giving you an out, not pressuring you, but boy was he sexy while he was doing it.    You reached out and wrapped your hand around the back of his neck, pulling him so he was right in front of you.  He was so hot with his hair down and you were so overwhelmed. Your crush was a few inches away from you, your lips so close to touching.    He closed the distance, tired of waiting for the kiss.  You immediately let yourself melt into his touch.  You lips moved against his own and you found a steady rhythm.  A minute later you pulled away for air.    "Neji, I, wow, that was, wow," you spoke, flustered.    "I agree," he chuckled.    Oh dear god his chuckle.  You'd never heard him do anything other than be serious. His chuckle was surprising, but it was music to your ears.  He must've noticed the stupid grin on your face because he spoke up.    "What?" he looked confused.    "Nothing, your chuckle is just really cute," you admitted, looking down.    He took this as a chance to lean down and capture your lips in another passionate kiss.    Now kissing him was great, but kissing wasn't gonna cure the need between your legs. You decide to speed this up by flipping him over your body and onto the bed next to you.    "Hey Neji," you said before crawling out from under the blanket.    "Yeah?"    "Promise not to judge me.  Nobody's ever seen me like this before," you said shyly.    "Of course I won't," Neji responded, his voice becoming soft.    You then pulled the blankets off and moved to straddle the boy.    "Y/n," he whispered out.    "I knew it was stupid, forget it," you said, beginning to crawl off of him because you were afraid he didn't like the way you looked.    "Hey," he spoke as he grabbed your waist, holding you close, "where are you going?"    "I knew you'd think I wasn't pretty, I just knew it," you got insecure all of a sudden.    "You are absolutely beautiful, Y/N, your personality, your face, your body. It's all perfect to me," he let his thumbs trace patterns on your waist.    You raised your head from his shoulder to look at him.    "Really?"    "I wouldn't lie about that," he kissed you again.    He began to pull away from the kiss, but before he could you grabbed his face and pulled him into an even deeper kiss.  This kiss quickly grew heated.  You felt like you were under some sort of spell.  The way he kissed you felt unreal, it made you feel like you were loved.  You could stay here with him like this forever.    Unfortunately, you both needed some more oxygen, so you were forced to break the kiss.  You both pulled away and you rested your forehead on his.    You took this moment as a chance to grind your hips down onto his to test the waters.  Luckily for you, he seemed to enjoy the kiss just as much, so when you rolled your hips against his, you earned a deep groan.  It came from his chest and he closed his eyes, allowing his hips to buck up slightly.    "Is that okay?" you asked Neji, not wanting to push too far.    "Yeah, it's good," he was breathing a little harder than normal.    With a sudden confidence gain, you gave Neji another deep kiss before kissing your way down his body.  When you reached his waistband, you stopped and peppered his hip bones and lower stomach.  He didn't seem to mind you staying like that for a while.  After teasing his skin for a while, you brought one of your hands to his lower thigh, before lightly tracing up the inside of his leg and reaching the bottom of his shorts.      You let your hand move further up his legs, still over his shorts until you reached his prominent bulge.  You let your hand apply pressure there, causing Neji to let out another groan.  You would never get tired of hearing him sound like that.    "Y/N," he almost begged.  You didn't take Neji as much of a sub in bed, but here you were, on top of him, causing little whimpers to leave his mouth.    Deciding he had been teased enough, you finally reached to his waistband with both hands, to which he responded by lifting his hips, allowing you to take off his shorts and boxers in one go.    Now, being a virgin, you had never been in this situation before, so seeing his size took you by surprise.  You knew enough about sex to know what was supposed to happen, but knowing and doing are two different things.    Still unsure of what to do, you moved your head towards him and began to lick up and down Neji's hard member.  You decided to just go ahead and go all in, finally taking him in your mouth, lips wrapped around his head.    His hips bucked up into your mouth, which took you by surprise, but it wasn't all that bad.    "S- Sorry," Neji moaned. He clearly didn't mean to buck into your mouth like that, but you assumed that he was just enjoying it, so his hips bucked subconsciously.    You pulled off of him then, kissing your way back up his body before reaching his face again.    "It's alright," you kissed him on his lips.    As you were kissing, Neji saw an opportunity to flip you over, allowing him to hover over you.    Something about the way he was just inches away from you, his left arm holding his body above you was downright erotic.  His chest was pressed right up against yours, both of your bodies covered in a thin sheen of sweat. He let his right arm roam your body, landing at your knee and pulling your leg up around his waist, grinding against you.    The feeling of him grinding into you with no clothes was amazing, it made you see stars.    He moved his way down your body, copying your actions from earlier.  He left marks down your body, nibbling every once in a while as he lowered to where you needed him most.    The view of him in between your thighs was almost enough to cum right then and there.    "Can I?" he mumbled in between kisses to your inner thighs.    "Y- Yes, please," you breathed out.  You needed him.    He wasted no time in putting his mouth to work.  You moaned and your back arched as his tongue flattened while he licked in between your legs.  Your hands made their was to his hair and grabbed as he ate you out.    "Neji, oh god, oh please," you moaned, encouraging Neji even more.    After hearing you moan his name like that, he gained the courage to let his tongue to dip into your heat and curl up.    "Oh, god, Neji, I'm gonna, I'm gon-" you were cut off by your own moan as pleasure took over your body.    Your back arched, your grip in Neji's hair tightened, and you moaned so loud, you thought the neighbors would hear.  As your back arched, Neji's hand supported you by placing it on your lower back.    Neji kept eating you out, allowing you to come down from your high.    After you had come down, Neji worked his way back up your body, kissing you gently when he reached your lips.    "Neji, please, I just need you," you moaned, bucking you hips up so he would get the hint.    "Are you sure?" Neji asked you, rubbing against your entrance.    "Yes, please Neji," you moaned out.    With that, Neji took his time in moving in, not wanting to hurt you.    After he was fully inside you, he stopped to let you adjust.  He seemed to know what he was doing, he knew just what to do.    "Are you ready for me to move?"      "N-Not yet. It's my first time, sorry," you felt like you were taking to long to adjust.    "It's okay, and it's my first time too, so don't worry," he gave you a few gentle kisses, as if to reassure you.    After Neji had kissed you, you felt comfortable enough for him to move.    "Okay, you can move now," you spoke quietly.    "Are you sure?" God, he was so sweet, he didn't wanna hurt you.    "100%"    He then pulled out slowly before thrusting back in, gaining a stead rhythm.  The pain started to dissipate, turning to pleasure,    "God, Y/N, feels so good," Neji let out a moan as he picked up his pace.    Then, as if his mind decided to clear up all of a sudden, his hips stopped and his eyes went wide.    "What? What's wrong?" you asked worriedly.    "Condom," Neji was freaking out because he had forgot about condoms.    You giggled.    "Why are you laughing? I'm being serious."    "Because I'm on birth control for my periods," you were still chuckling slightly.    "Well, you could've told me that before now," Neji let out a breath of relief.    "Well, now you know, so could we get back to what we were doing?"    He just shook his head at how goofy you were being, before thrusting again.    You moaned at the sudden attention.      He held your body close to his as he moved inside you.    The two of you were in your own world, the only thing that mattered was the person in front of you.  You completed each other, moving together perfectly. You'd be happy to stay like this forever, with Neji holding you close.    "Y/N I'm really close, I'm not gonna be able to last much longer," Neji moaned in your ear.    "Me too, Neji, please don't stop," you barely got out the words as he hit that special spot inside you.    You moaned louder that you had all night.    "Yes, oh god, right there, Neji, right there," you nearly yelled.    He kept up the pace, but made sure to hit the same pace inside you with each thrust, wanting to give you the most pleasure you had ever felt.  If that really was his goal, he was definitely accomplishing it.    He had already given you one mind blowing orgasm tonight. Yet you thought he may raise the bar even higher with the next one.    "Fuck, Neji, oh I'm cumming, Neji, oh," your back arched even further into the male above you as you reached your peak.    Neji kept thrusting as you came down from your orgasm, moving to reach his own high.    You spasming around him sent him over the edge.  He grunted your name over and over as he weakly thrusted a few more times before stilling inside you.    Neji then collapsed on you, moving to lay his head on your chest.  You smiled down at him as he laid there, breathing heavily.  You moved one hand up to rest on Neji's back and trace patterns on his spine.    "That. Was. Amazing," Neji breathed out, looking up at you.    "Agreed," you replied, also out of breath.    After a few moments of silence you spent just looking each other in the eyes, Neji finally spoke.    "I'm sorry," he whispered.    "For what?" was he sorry for having sex with you? Did he regret it?    "For looking down on you all those years.  I only did it because I knew if you tried you could be a great ninja.  I guess in my mind, I was just trying to push you to become the ninja I knew you could become," Neji spoke softly.    "It's alright, Neji, in a way you did encourage me to become stronger.  You encouraged me to train hard with Kakashi every day so I could still be strong," you explained, "The only reason I wasn't in the academy with you was because my parents never believed I'd be good enough without my family's kekkei genkai."    "Well screw them, you're absolutely amazing," Neji huffed out, moving to hover over you again, resting his forehead on yours, "you are a strong, gorgeous, and intelligent young woman, and I love that about you."    "Thank you Neji, it really means a lot to me," you smiled, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him in to kiss you.    He was the first to pull away from the kiss.    "Now, I'm gonna make up for all those years," he spoke.    "What do you me-" you were cut off when you felt Neji's hand rubbing up and down the inside of you thigh.    Neji then let his hand spread your legs even wider, nudging your leg away, giving him access to what he was looking for.    He didn't take long to tease you, quickly taking his finger to rub a few circles around your hole before slipping in.  Your breath was already picking up again, still enjoying the attention he was giving you.    "Oh Neji, god, feels too good, don't stop," you moaned to the ninja hovering above you.    Your breath was speeding up even more.  You had no clue how he managed to make you feel so good.  I mean, he said he was a virgin.  How the hell did he know how to please a woman like this?      You bit your lip to hold back your moans, feeling slightly embarrassed by how good he made you feel.    "Don't hold back, Y/N, let me hear how good I make you feel.  Let me hear you."    Oh dear god, Neji was gonna be the death of you.  It seemed like every word out of his mouth caused you to melt.  You really need to calm the fuck down or you'll have a damn heart attack.    "Does this feel good? You like that?" he said, curling his fingers up as he thrusted them as deep as he could.    "Fuck, yes, yes, feels so good Neji."    He then moved down your body, leaving a trail of kisses on your skin.    While he used his fingers to pleasure you, he let his tongue focus on playing with your clit.  He then removed his fingers and switched the position of his fingers and his tongue.  His tongue was now moving in and out of you at a fairly quick pace as Neji's fingers moved to play with your clit.    He then stopped everything, pulling away from you completely.    If only you knew what he had in store for you.    He moved up and grabbed your hips before flipping the two of you over, letting you sit on his hips.    You decided to take control of the situation and do something you had always thought about.    You slid yourself down Neji's body, stopping when you were straddling one of his thighs.  When you were settled there, you began to slowly move up and down Neji's thighs, grinding yourself down and pleasuring yourself.    "Mmm feels so good, Neji, god yes," you moaned.    "Come up here, Y/N," Neji motioned for you to come back up to where he was.    You obliged, moving up to straddle his hips again. He took his hands and grabbed your hips, lifting you off his hips and moving you beside him.    "Can you get on all fours for me, Y/N?" he asked you.    You obeyed him again, moving to get on all fours.  As you settled there, Neji laid down, his face right in between your legs.    He took your hips in his hands again, pulling you down to his face.  Oh my fucking god, he wanted you to sit on his face.  You definitely weren't gonna protest.    He brought one of his hands up to thrust into you, while his tongue took care of everything else.  Oh, this was definitely how you die.    You were no gonna last long like this if he kept up with what he was doing.    "Neji, oh fuck, god it feels so good, keep going, just like that."    Your words caused him to moan into your core, sending another jolt of pleasure up your spine, shivers moving through your body.    "I'm gonna cum soon, Neji, you make me feel so good, fuck."    This caused him to speed up his actions, moving faster than he had all night.  He knew how to hit every single pleasure point in your whole body.  Everything he did, every movement he made, made you feel perfect.  Every damn thing brought you closer to the edge, but his words are what finally put you over the edge.    Neji pulled his mouth away from you to encourage you.    "God, you're absolutely beautiful, Y/N. Are you gonna cum for me? Cum for me," Neji said to you, his voice sounded so god damn sensual.    That was it, you came for the third time that night, back arching again, Neji's fingers still moving inside you, working you down from your orgasm.      After you came down from the peak, you moved to lay on Neji's chest, your breath coming out more as gasps.    "God, you are absolutely amazing, Neji," you spoke as you moved your head to look at him.    "You're amazing, Y/N." he replied, emphasizing that you were amazing, while implying that he wasn't.    "Oh shush," you giggled, dropping your head back down to his chest.    Neji took one of his hands to your hip, the other resting behind his head. The hand holding you traced patterns across your hips and lower back.  You drifted off to sleep on Neji's chest, loving the feeling of his chest rising and falling with his breathing.    Maybe Neji Hyuga wasn't so bad after all.
~fin~
That was not what I first imagined when I started writing but here we are. SO sorry for the weird carrot joke, but it was part of the prompt I was given so I had to roll with it. Oops. Vote, comment, and suggest ideas if you'd like, it'd really help me out. Thanks so much!!
-Smutty-Chan
46 notes · View notes
i am very much enjoying my vague void! it's currently blasting hozier at full volume and that's almost louder than my internal screaming (don't worry, everything is fine, i just saw a spider)
i've never once in my life have followed a recipe correctly. all of my measurements are completely random and whatever happens happens. it is no longer in my hands. whatever eldritch entities exist take the wheel. and i absolutely refuse to spell anything in english without autocorrect because y'all have way too many double letters and random vowel placement
thank you! sadly, i won't have a break right now, because we just had christmas vacations, but the start of the new semester is always pretty chill. and you're absolutely right, i should take up necromancy! the snow and the cold will add to my mysterious vibes. i just need to get a big black cape with a hood to complete the aesthetic
i definitely picture everything above 5'6 feet as the same height. 5'7 and 6'2? the exact same thing. no difference here
how is morepork a real bird name. it's just... more pork? but the bird is magnificent. i completely approve of your first order as bird queen, not that you need approval from mere peasants like me, but it's a great order. ohhh salps look really cool, and it does look a lot like it! when you said boob implant i thought of mermaids and them using salps as boob implants but then i realised wait wouldn't jellyfish be better for that? because of their shape? ignoring their little leggies they're quite boob shaped, no? and then i realised that i was thinking about mermaids and alive boob implants... if i had to think it, you have to read it. i'm sorry
i was sold before but now i'm even more sure that i want to hire you. and I'll make sure to have lactose free cheese for the backflips (unless you want the lactose version? i'm not judging). will the biting of ankles cost extra?
that sounds like a brilliant set-up for a horror movie where they kill off all the children one by one. it's absolutely horrifying. if something like that would've happened to me i would've most likely just passed out. whatever happens afterwards is not my problem. and now i really don't want to know what the hell your leg was caught on because that seems like knowledge that would get me killed
ah so you're a fellow dirt eater? according to my mom my favourite thing to do outside when i was a little kid used to be eating sand. just shovelling handfuls of it into my mouth and crying when my mom made me spit it out. which i refuse to believe. if there are no photos it didn't happen
you warm climate people are starting to make me think that i'm better adjusted to the cold than i thought i am! it's either that or our buildings are better heated. i definitely don't know if anyone else calls hot water bottled hotties but i like it so from now on i'm using it
that's so cute! i was clearly a way more selfish child because when i found any amount of money i just kept it and bought candy as soon as i could. i clearly couldn't save money then and i can't now. we have stores like that (or i'm assuming that they're like that solely based on how they sell lollies) and they used to be my favourite thing because you could get so many lollies for such a small price!! and my mom even used to let me order for myself sometimes so i always felt like a very big girl jsjshsbsjk
also the fact that i can't send pictures on anon is a crime (yes i know why and it's good that that's not possible because can you imagine anons being able to send pictures? oh no is all i have to say about it) but anyways. because i have this one super cursed photo that reminded me of you and now i can't share it :((
duuuuude, sick void bro. sounds like a vibing void. I feel like I haven’t seen a spider in awhile. Other than daddy long legs. But they’re chill. They mind their own business. 
I nearly always follow recipes exactly. My mum is like oh cook this for about 7 minutes? Yeah sure. I’ll take a wild guess. I’m like they say exactly 7 minutes so I’ll set a timer for 7 minutes and start a stopwatch so if it does seem to need more than 7 I can keep an eye on the extra time and be aware of exactly how long it takes me for next time. Other people are like oh let's see I have [lists 5-10 things in their fridge], hmm...oh I know what I could make with that! I’m like I have beans in my freezer because one recipe required them and no other recipes I know how to make do so what am I supposed to do with these now,,, this is stressful,,, basically I barely know how to cook and recipes are the only things saving me in that area. That is entirely fair. Except for the fuck duck, and murder is not the word you want surely, situations, it’s pretty helpful.
Ohhh I see. At least the start is chill! For a little! Before your entire situation spirals out of hand and you’re behind in every class and it’s taken you a whole day to read 10 pages and you’re exhausted and it’s only week 2. Just me? ok. fair. anyway. I want a cloak so bad. One of my uni friends tempted me to class because she said she was wearing a cloak so my depressed ass honest to god dragged myself out of bed and to said class just to see it. It was worth it. They’re incredible. Everyone should own a big cloak for the aesthetic.
I’m glad it isn’t just me hahaha. I can visualise my own height in feet but everything else is just the same size that is a vague amount taller than me, mentally.
It’s also known as the ruru. But the name morepork amuses me. It’s named after the call it makes haha. It does sound like it’s asking for more pork if you know to listen for that. thank u for ur approval, it means a lot, turns out becoming bird queen didn’t ACTUALLY get rid of my anxiety disorder weirdly enough so validation is great! lmaooo. What if the jellyfish stung them tho? At least salps wouldn’t do you dirty like that. The mermaids would just look like there are hundreds of bugs crawling around in their boobs, flesh shifting as they float around. Which is a vibe. If you’re into that. Jellyfish WOULD make a more solid, single, implant, some of them are definitely boob shaped. But that’s kinda boring no one’s gonna be traumatised by that. Salps on the other hand...yeah, that sight will DEFINITELY traumatise someone.
To be PERFECTLY honest I haven’t done a backflip in years but for lactose-free cheese? Dude. I’ll be going back to training. Gonna be the best backflip you’ve ever seen. As long as it’s not Tasty cheese I am content, but lactose free IS better. The biting of ankles will not cost extra, it is a pleasure to be allowed to do that.
Oh it absolutely would be. It’d be very funny if it reached the wider world bc people would probably be like ok but who would send kids into the bush like that,, it’s an odd concept. meanwhile everyone who grew up in nz is gonna be like y’all, you’re not gonna fuckin BELIEVE what i experienced growing up, it’s real dude. On one hand, I feel like murdering kids in a movie is questionable, on the other hand, It exists, so maybe people would be down for it. I feel like it’d be a good concept even if it wasn’t murdery tho. Like psychological horror? I’m not sure if I’m using that category correctly I don’t watch much horror. A kid following the rope but then being shifted into a different horror dimension but they never take the blindfold off because their teachers said not to and they’d probably have to let go of the rope to do it...I feel like this could work super well as a short film. The viewers see everything. The child just knows something is off and no one is coming when they call for help. I am so down for this. I also do not want to know what my leg was caught on. Some things I am better off not knowing.
yes! I am a fellow dirt eater! We had a sandpit at home (that’s a little bold. It was a large plastic shell that my parents filled with sand. technically a sandpit. but not fancy sdflsdkfsdf) but I don’t think I ever tried to eat it. Then again, I possibly did and just don’t remember because there’s no photo evidence of that one. I’d have to ask my parents sdfhsjdfs, I would however fully believe them if they said yes. it’s very characteristic of me. I don’t doubt it for a second. muuuum that’s my emotional support sand don’t make me spit it out smh the disrespect these days.
Oh I’m absolutely terrible even by most people’s standards around here when it comes to cold and hot temperatures. I remember sitting in the sun in my school shirt and school jersey in summer on a blazing day like it’s a bit chilly, isn’t it? Meanwhile my friends were in the shade absolutely dying from the heat. Likewise in winter I’d be shivering, teeth chattering, dying with my long sleeve thermal, my school shirt, my school jersey, my school jacket, my longs, warm socks and sneakers and gloves and school scarf while ppl would be walking around in a shirt and shorts like it’s a bit warm this winter huh? my body didn’t learn how to thermoregulate and it shows. But yeah NZ does also have a reputation for shittily insulated buildings and such. It shows. skhdfsfs if it’s not common use maybe don’t say can i have a hotty to someone without context but otherwise go ahead lmao. it’s a fun shortened version.
I was typically a very good saver, to the point where my extended family started gifting me gift cards and vouchers for Christmas and my birthday because if they just gave me money I’d put it in my bank account to save towards uni once I hit like, 12 years old. Which I think was a smart move. But apparently, I’m supposed to buy myself ‘something nice’ with it. I think I’m still an okay saver but I’m not as strict anymore. I’m aware of how much I can spare and I’m not just like you can never get anything for yourself ever, so I do get lil things for myself sometimes. oooo yay! At least you know what I mean. But yes. They were the gold mine for lollies. Absolutely terrific stores. My mum would be like hey lindsey how about you order? And I’d be like mother, I am 7 years old and I have an undiagnosed anxiety disorder everyone assumes is child shyness why would you think I would want to do that. Instead I will whisper my choices to you. After therapy tho I felt pretty rad for picking my own lollies by myself. I was like 13 at that point but sdfkjhsdf listen I got there in the end.
sdfkjsdfkjhsdf I like that a cursed photo reminded you of me. That’s all I need to hear. Tumblr said no anon dick pics but they also said no anon cursed photos either,,, very sad. for the latter part. the first part thank god. If I could turn on photos on anon I absolutely would just to see this but I don’t think I can :(
2 notes · View notes