#i'm allergic to shutting the fuck up today actually
Text
"I gazed again at that sad, dark house- the place that had been a prison. Elain had said she missed it, and I wondered what she saw when she looked at the cottage. If she beheld not a prison but a shelter- a shelter from a world that had possessed so little good, but she tried to find it anyway, even if it had seemed foolish and useless to me."
interesting! interesting! much to think about in regards to the "the prison is actually the dusk court" theory! interesting!
#pro elain#YEAH ITS A CRACK THEORY MIND YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS!#i'm allergic to shutting the fuck up today actually
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
Cryptid!Eddie x Reader | PART FIVE
⇠Part 1 | Part 4 | Next⇢
Warnings: A little bit of lite angst. Fluff. Shenanigans.
Down in the shop, you opened the door to greet Lucas, who stood nervously before a small group.
"Wait, Robin?" You questioned.
She shrugged and tried to smile.
"You know we're not open today, you didn't have to come in." You said.
She cleared her throat, "Um I'm here with them, actually, so...um." she stammered.
Your mouth opened to reply, but only a breath of air followed after. Instead, you stepped to the side.
"Of course, um you know take the lift just there, He's in the studio waiting. Hope no one's allergic to cats." You spoke, closing the door behind them.
You couldn't fight the feeling out of place. "Make yourselves at home there are, refreshments and-"
"____? What happened to your shoulder?" asked Lucas.
"What?" you questioned in surprise.
You followed his pointed finger and found your wrappings were peeking through your collar. Your hand rested on your shoulder as you frowned slightly.
"I am sure it will be a topic on the table today. Please just go upstairs. I think he'll be happy to see some friendly faces. He's a little nervous." you tried your best to divert the topic.
"Let's not start this on a sour note. Or freak them out, they're all a little spooked as it is." you thought, looking the odd group over.
"Did Eddie..." Robin's question faded as you offered a strained smile.
"Please just head up. It's perfectly safe. I'm just going to make a few drinks in the kitchen. It's cold this morning." You said to her.
"Everyone ok with Cocoa? Cider, Tea and Coffee is also on the table." you offered.
"I'll take a cider if that's fine." spoke a man with feathery hair.
"Whoa, wait, we're putting in orders like we're here for breakfast now?" Asked the tall brunette. A light scowl on his face.
Robin wacked his arm quickly with the back of her hand, "Shut up, ____ offered, it would be rude not to." she said in a hushed hiss.
"Coffee for me please, black and no sugar." said the man next to him, sporting a Mayhem Tee.
"Alright, I'll be up soon." you answered, stepping away from the lift and heading for the Kitchen.
"Six is a lot of people, and Lucas said some were out of town? No wonder he was upset to know Eddie didn't reach out to anyone." you mind fussed while making the orders.
Up the lifted, you entered your studio with drink carries atop of a wooden tray. Being careful to enter quietly, as you'd been more than a few minutes and were sure Eddie and his friends would be deep into explanations.
Opening the door, you slipped inside, pushing it back closed with your foot.
Looking up, you were met with a stiff scene.
Eddie stood near your divider, stone still as he held his tail in his hands, wringing it. His gaze was cast away from the stunned group of friends.
No one had seated themselves, and the snacks were left untouched. The room left so silent you could hear the agitated swishing of Toad's tail.
"That's not ideal." you thought, letting your eyes drift between them.
Clearing your throat, you walked between them and set the tray next to the snacks on the coffee table.
"Sorry if I interrupted anything." you said.
"We haven't exactly gotten started." Eddie murmured.
"Dude, you're - you've got-" The brunette fumbled his words, gesturing towards Eddie with his hands. "Lots of new things and you're humongous!" his voice pitched.
"Steve!" Robin scolded.
"He is kind of humongous...." Lucas admitted trying to hold in a smile.
"DUDE!" the man sporting a hellfire shirt cheered, rushing towards Eddie with a grin. The Cider man and Mayhem man followed after him. All three mobbing Eddie into a fearless hug.
"What the fuck, man!"
"Where have you been?"
"What witch did you piss off?"
The trio mobbed him with various questions and Eddie was left baffled, mouth opening and closing like a fish. He looked over his three playful attackers and continued to fail at forming words.
Then, like a fountain overflowing, laughter boiled up from his chest and he returned their hug. Enfolding them in his wings.
You exhaled in relief, "that's better." you thought.
Picking up a platter of cookies, you held it out to those left, and each took one.
The mood eased into something more comfortable as everyone listened to the excited exchange happening on the floor of your living room.
After a long round of introductions, and welcome homes, the real conversation began. Perching yourself further away from the group, you listened in.
"So you don't remember anything? Not how you got back here, or what caused this change?" Lucas asked.
"No, not in the slightest. I barely remember speaking with Dustin before everything went dark. I um...." Eddie began to fidget, taking a glance over his shoulder to where you sat.
Arching a brow, you gestured for him to continue. This was quickly becoming a theme anytime he began to speak of his current experiences. Looking for a nudge to go on.
"I woke up, and I was," Eddie exhaled his face twisting, "I was st-standing over some homeless guy, and He was... I had," he tried explaining with his hands, but the group still appeared lost.
"Smashed him?" Jeff guessed.
"Tickled the guy?" questioned Grant.
Steve's head snapped to grant direction, "tickled?" he asked.
Grant shrugged, "would be disturbing, wouldn't it?"
Eddie's words flowed slowly, "No, I ate the guy."
The room fell silent.
Eddie shook his head, "I probably was planning on eating ____ last night when they found me. If it hadn't been for them and the other monster. I don't know... If I'm tired, the need to feed is weaker." he explained.
Casting his eyes up to his friends, his gaze pled with them. "It why I didn't reach out to anyone. I didn't want to put any of you at risk. Not when things were seeming to be back to normal." said Eddie.
"Normal?" Gareth questioned, the word tumbling out sharp and hoarse.
"Dude, there's no normal without you." said Jeff, as the three band members glanced at each other in agreement.
Eddie bit his lip and attempted to fight off the water in his eyes through a smile.
"How'd you end up...you know, here? With the Hellgate Madman's kid?" Steve asked.
"Steve!" Robin scolded, "I swear, if you get me fired-"
"You won't be fired, Robin. I'm used to it." you sighed, "It was all over the news."
"That's you?" Jeff asked.
You simply nodded your head and munched on a cookie.
Eddie's expression was dry as he muttered, "Can we not with that nickname? Please?"
Steve and Robin glanced at each other with brows raised.
"Anyway, I was following Wayne. I'd been tailing him in the evenings before he headed off to work ever since he recovered." Eddie said. He crossed his arms and grimaced, "He should have retired by now."
"The old guy, spent most of his retirement fun on private detectives...to look for you. Lawyers to get you pardoned once everything was over." Grant stated carefully.
Though, his gentle delivery didn't stop the distress on Eddie's face.
"Shit." Eddie whispered, his claws digging into his arms.
You picked up a cheese square from your paper plate and tossed it. Eddie jumped slightly when it bounced off the back of his head and released his claws from his skin.
"Wayne came here to pick up lunch on the way to his shift, I felt the urge to feed, and I was desperate to stop it, so I hoped in the dumpster and well...got found." Eddie confessed.
All eye fell on you. You sat up straighter under the pressure of the many stares.
"You just let him in?" Lucas asked.
"Look like, well-" Robin started.
"Yeah, I thought ____ was nuts too." Eddie murmured.
"I thought he was a dog, I didn't see him at first. Then he spoke to me, and I thought it was some homeless man. I offered him something warm and - It wasn't until after that I saw him." You explained.
The memory of the night vividly repeating in your head. The look in his eyes. Hopeful and frightened beyond belief.
"Evil things don't look that scared." you spoke quietly.
"And I know better than anyone that the outside doesn't always match the soul within." you turned your gaze away from the group and looked at Eddie.
"You had the same hopeful fear my brother used to carry with him everywhere."
You turned to the group, "so I let him in. Turns out, he's kind of a big ol' puppy." you snickered.
Eddie blushed, "Jesus." he muttered.
Robin got up and wandered to the kitchen counter, helping herself to some of the cheese and crackers.
"So...is there a way to get you back to normal?" She asked.
"Or a way to get y our memories back?" Robin added.
"Hell if I know." Eddie sighed. " I dream about things, they feel real like memories only. Only when I'm sleeping and they're nightmarish. I'd like them not to be memories..." he said.
You frowned, "Demons eating you alive from inside, if they feel real enough to have you speak in your sleep the way you did...the might be memories." You thought, focusing on Eddie.
He stole a glance your way and winced. "I don't know where the other one came from, but I'm glad it threw me around a bit. It's likely the only thing that stopped me."
"So you've got to be worn out at the end of every day, and need meat?" Lucas asked.
"That's easy enough, it's like when get got that meat to lure Dart." Steve said.
"Only a lot more, a whole lot more." Lucas murmured, eying Eddie carefully.
"I get large shipments in from a butcher in DC. Friend of my moms. I can help with keeping him fed before feeding time. Otherwise...he just needs to eat, right?" you asked, looking around.
"You've been on your own all this time, right? Finding food in general couldn't have been easy," you said to Eddie, "That had to make everything worse. Your body has been in survival mode for years. Getting regular meals every day will probably help things."
Eddie gave a nod, "____'s got a point." he said.
"When Dustin and Will and the others come back, we'll start trying to figure out where you might have crawled out from, where the other monster might have come from." Lucas said.
"Yeah, and I'll call Nance, If anyone can think of an idea about your memory, it's her." Steve chimed in.
"In the meantime, maybe it's best to focus on calming your...cravings. If we can curb those down into fewer episodes, things will be easier. And we can reunite you with Wayne without you worrying so much." you said.
Eddie nodded, "Yeah. That all sounds good but. Where do I go?" He asked.
You chuckled, "You said you were staying here. Although, I'm putting you to work as security and manual labor."
"I can work." Eddie said quickly.
Gareth held out the cookie platter, "um..." he lulled.
You laughed and tilted your head towards the stove, "in the oven is round two. They should be cooled off." you said.
It'd become rowdy in your little studio, Robin, Steve and Lucas shouted mercilessly at the game, while Eddie sat among his bandmates trying to take in waves of information and events he'd missed over the past few years.
You sat with Toad, giving her all the scratches she required to make up for the noise you'd brought into her castle.
"Oh!" grant gasped, it alerted the other two men who looked equally dumbfounded.
"Shit that right!" Gareth laughed.
Eddie looked between them wordlessly when Jeff hoped to his feet. He caught a set of keys that Grant tossed to him and bolted for the lift.
"Be right back, we brought you something!" Jeff called as the doors closed.
When Jeff returned and the lift doors opened, Eddie instantly rose to his feet. You watched as he took extra careful steps towards Jeff, his arms held out and eyes glued to the black case he carried.
"Hey! Out the way!" Steve shouted as Eddie's large frame blocked the play.
Eddies words fluttered forth in a whisper, "she still lives?" he asked.
Jeff lifted the case in his arms and opened it. Eddie's eyes shinned like headlights. You crane your neck, trying your best to catch a glimpse of what was inside.
Reaching out for the contents, Eddie stopped himself. A pitiful gaze fell on his claws. "I can't," He murmured.
You sighed and chucked a cheese square across the room, dotting the side of Eddie's head.
He closed his eyes in a muted chuckle.
"Remember what I said?" you asked him.
With a nod, Eddie turned to you, "I do, but this is different." he said.
You set Toad down, and she made her way to the cracked window. Joining Eddie and his bandmates, you peer into the case, marveling at the crimson crackled guitar inside.
"Oh, that's the one you mentioned..." you murmured, recalling his recounting of his experiences with 'Vecna' and the strange place.
You looked up at Eddie, who's eyes won't leave the instrument.
"It's not different, it'll be easy." you told him, your eyes falling on the guitar, the corner of your mouth curved up. "Once a guitarist, always a guitarist. You just need a reminder." You reasoned.
"Exactly, what they said. You already know what to do, man." Gareth chimed.
"Seriously guys, this is touching, but the game!" Robin called out, swiveling from side to side to see around them.
Grant took up the guitar and slipped its strap around Eddie, having to stand on his tiptoes even with Eddie bent over.
Eddie gazed down at his guitar and sucked in his lips, hands hovered in position but too afraid to touch it.
"I've got three more pieces of cheese." You warned him.
Eddie's fingers curled around the neck of the guitar. "I hate to break it to you. But there's no way I'm touching these strings without them snapping." he muttered.
A wild grin formed on Eddie's face, "But just holding her again feels so good." he said, looking at everyone almost blissfully.
Lucas tore his eyes away from the small patch of game he could see, "I might know a guy who I bet knows what we can use to make stronger strings." he said.
"Sinclair, you pull that off, and I'll owe you for life." Eddie stated.
"And, Nutty over there will give you free cookies." He added.
"Nutty?" You questioned.
Eddie stuck out his tongue, "It's not Yoda."
You threw all three pieces of cheese you'd kept in your hand.
Eddie stood crouched in front of the shop kitchen's many ovens. Watching the cookies you'd have delivered to Wayne as they baked.
The tip of his tail swished about happily, it'd been doing none stop since his friends arrived and fell into their casual norms.
"He'll like these, uncle Wayne used to love when miss Simmons next door would bake him things." Eddie said.
You busied yourself by chopping the apples for tomorrow's pie filling, trying to get a head start.
Eddie stood up and turned to join you, leaning onto the counter and resting his chin in his hand. "I thought chefs chopped fast." he teased.
"I'm tired." you said.
Glancing up at him, you asked, "why don't you wash those claws and put them to good use?"
He held up his hands and wiggled his fingers, claws clacking together. Turning, he walked to the sink and washed his hands.
Scooting over to make room, you rolled a few apples over for him.
Eddie studied the fruit for a moment.
"Take your time, there's no rush, this will be good practice for you-"
With a single swipe, there was a refreshing tear.
Your head snapped to look over, there the apple lay evenly cut. Your mouth fell open, and Eddie held his head high with pride as he repeated the swipe with the other apples given to him.
"How's that?" he smirked.
You shoved the remaining apple pile in front of him, causing him to laugh.
"Where are you going?" Eddie asked you, turning his neck to follow as you made your way to a set of hooks on the wall.
You plucked a black apron from the wall mount and returned to him.
"Stoop, please." you said.
Eddie did as you asked, allowing you to slip the apron around his neck before moving to tie it up behind his back.
"Congratulations, you are now the Lucky Pot's new Legumier." you said.
"What? In layman's please?" He asked.
"You chop up all fruits and veggies." you answered.
"Ah, can do." Eddie said with a salute.
"Night prep can keep you busy, hopefully." you said.
Eddie smirked, "do I get paid?" he asked.
You blinked a few times, "what a roof and free food not enough for you?"
He paled, "that's not what i- I didn't - I was just-" Eddie's panic died down as he glared playfully at the amused glint in your eyes.
"You're messing with me." he muttered.
"You panic so easily!" you laugh.
"Look, you're here now, and I never go back on my word. Your place is solidified until you can go back out into the world." you promise.
Eddie smiled and stuck out his long pinky, "you swear?" he asked.
Hooking your pinky around his, you nodded, "I swear."
"On Toad's honor?" Eddie grinned.
"On our high queen's honor, yes." you chuckled.
A worrying smell ruffled its way up your noses, your eyes widened in panic, "The cookies!" you yelped.
As you rushed to the oven, slipping on mitts, Eddie's tail flung out. He took hold of the oven handle and tugged the door down, allowing you quick access.
You swiftly grabbed the tray and set it atop the stove.
"You're quick with your tail." you exhaled.
Eddie rubbed the back of his neck, "I wish I could say I meant to do that. But," he shrugged and took his tail up in his hand, "this thing just does what it wants, it's like it has a second brain." he muttered.
"Well, thank you, Eddie's tail, for your assistance." you teased, "maybe I should hire it instead..."
"Nope, we're a package deal." said Eddie.
For a moment you're taken in by his smile, it was good to see. Maybe things would work out alright for him.
"Baby steps, that's all it takes." you thought, watching Eddie go back to chopping.
____ slept soundly, exhausted from the events of the last couple of days. Eddie fed and munched on leftovers from the gathering. Tossing cheese squares into his mouth and failing to catch them.
His mind buzzing about all the new possibilities. It'd been a long time since he'd felt the levels of hope he currently had nestled inside.
"Wayne somehow seems to know just what I need even when not trying." he thought, looking towards the room divider.
Eddie left Toad to sleep alone on the back of the sofa and, with a large jump, hooked his claws into the ceiling. He crawled across it until he'd made it passed the divider.
Siting up, he hung upside down from his feet, hair dangling as he peered at ____. Watching their steady breathing, buried within blankets.
A tingle crept down Eddie's spine.
"The blanket!" his mind screamed, Eddie looked towards the window. "I left it back at the quarry..." he whispered. Crawling across the ceiling, Eddie plopped down on the ground before the window.
He quietly opened it higher and crawled out into the night.
"It should still be there." He thought.
Tag list:
@eddiesgirlforever @fan-girl-97 (← wasn't sure if you wanted me to reply or not! But yes, I've added you 😊😊) @obsessivelycraftygothfandomwitch
~ Just let me know, tag list is always open if anyone wishes to be added ❤
⇠Part 1 | Part 4 | Next⇢
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x you#cryptid!eddie x reader#demo!eddie x reader#eddie fic#sofiiel cryptid!fic#no reader physical descriptors#no use of y/n#eddie munson fic
79 notes
·
View notes
Text
FHJY Spoilers || my live thoughts as I watch episode 5
okay so I'm watching it late again because I had bowling. i actually did really well today if anyone cares🔥 there was also a few other personal things that stopped me from watching it for a bit.
NO MORE FANTASIZING ABOUT IT!!!
hey hey hey hey let's go ♪♪
the synod is so blue
EMILY IS SO CUTE I LOVE HER OUTFIT
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this episode idk how to explain it I just don't feel ready.
OH MY GOD THE BOGGY MINI HAS A HAT OH MY GOD I'M CRYING
EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP BOGGY HAS A HAT OH MY GOD
GORGUG MINI WITH CHOLE
The art team is so powerful
"Someone grab those teeth"
It's spicy in the dome tonight ‼️‼️
the hat on adaine and boggy make me want to cry they're so cute
WET BOGGY KISS
FIG IS THE GREATEST SECURITY GUARD 🔥🔥🔥🔥
ally chomp noise is so good
I love Brennan just rolling stuff and not saying what it's for
shittering
HEY GIRLIES
"(Murph whimpering with uncertainty)" that's how I feel every second of my existence
I NEED YOU TO DRIVE STRAIGHT THROUGH THE DOORS OF SEACASTER MANOR
Fabian dancing upset is so funny
twenty five armor class 🔥🔥🔥
dancing between the legs of a centaur?!??!??
HE WANTS TO JUMP ON A TABLE??????
oh thank god he made it
Riz is so good at hiding
murph reading the spell description is so satisfying, I need him to narrate an audio book
200% blood D: good god
Riz flossing
FIVE ATTACKS
"is that allowed?"
"And I'm stuck with her and her minus 3 Dex"
STOP ATTACKING CASSANDRA
"I'm useless" "no, you're not" "I'm useless!" "no, you're not!"
Riz fornite dancing
"I want you to profile them"
CONOR COUNTERSPELL
"he's on the security detail now" oh my god
"he's my intern" OH MY GOD
"He's gonna leak it all on discord" hhehehehehhehe
"I rolled a zero initiative" ON THE BATTLE ABOUT HER GODDESS???? oh my god
"Is this what Ragh's mom absorbed?" Zac Oyama you are a genius
NAT 20 PERSUASION!!!!!!!
"It just sounded loud because of all the plastic breaking"
"Don't spoil it, is it a buff Kristen?"
"Roll on the back of my motorcycle, I love you!"
there's so many good one liners
ooh!
worth a try
not nightmare king related?
attack the orbs!
CAT GRINDERS
Kalina is actually so hot, I need her
EMILY IS SO GIGGLY
NOOO WHAT IS GOING ON WUUWUEHW
CASSANDRA??????????????
SHE'S ALLERGIC TO SHRIMP??????
"I think this is someone else's fault and not mine"
"I WAS IN PARTY MODE"
"This is some Gilear shit" "I think I need to go to the hospital"
oh my god I feel unwell from giggling so much
ADAINE NAT 20
"Do I suck?" "You? No!"
yah!
rage Adaine sounds powerful I need her to multiclass into barbarian /j
SAVE CONOR. SAVE CONOR. SAVE CONOR.
NOOOOOOO CONORRRR
rage conor kinda 🫦
KALINA SAID RAGH BARKROCK????????
SHE'S FUCKING SHIMMYING
18 doesn't hit kalina??!?!??
FABIAN ON THE CLOCK
"WE HAVE TO GO NOW."
AND KALINA DOES WHAT??????? HUH??? HUH HUH HUH???? HUH???? WHAT???? HUH?????? WHAT? KALINA WHAT???? HUH???????????? HUH??????????????
lower than a nine pls pls pls pls pls pls pls
THAT'S A 3 🔥🔥🔥
evil kalina is still hot
"oh come on man!"
i miss ayda aguefort
every stage of grief in ally beardsley they're such a mood
CLERIC DOWN...
BARDIC SHRIMPSIRATION
just looking for nat ones....
I DON'T LIKE ALL THESE DICE ROLLS
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHAT IS GOING ON WHAT WHAT WHAT HUH WHAT HUH WHAT IS GOING WHAT
bop bop
CANTER COUNTERSPELL
the ball has gotta go (but not The Ball™)
"Interesting. Well. I'm done talking to you I think."
GORGUG NAT 20!!!!
he still listens to his ex's mixtape.........
three point stance...
no pressure kristen
does Cassandra need to accept her anger and manage it healthily...?
i need to be hugged by buff Kristen I think that would fix me
there is so many box of dooms...
wait. wait. Kristen is channeling rage to her advantage..... what if she multi classes into a barbarian that would be kinda sick
omg they're switching it up
WHY ARE THEY ROLLING SO BADLY?????
"Girlie, are you still mad at me, girlie?"
nonna crit
ADAINE IS SO CLOSE
"he's gonna blow up the world"
i don't like this dramatic music
SHATTERS THE CLOCK??????
"Oh gross"
TIME QUANGLE??????
WHAT IS GOING ON???
OH MY GOD CONOR COUNTER SAVED THEM
fig nat 20 on understanding time loops
AT WHO'S SIDE????????
HUH???
"a master you deserve" WHAT.
oh no.... did adaine's job place just got ruined? does she have to show up to her job now? is she still going to get paid???????
"Did your god get turned into toxic positivity."
RAGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
"I buttered up!"
"(Gasp) oh my god!" Hangman is so cute
oh my goodness my face hurts from giggling from the party
I miss Ayda Aguefort so much
wait I don't think fig should be doing the shrimp jump because her luck is so unbelievably bad. this could go South so fast.
FIG NAT 20 ON THE SHRIMP JUMP
THE THOUSAND YARD STARE ALLY HAS..
I don't like how epic Brennan is describing it because I have a bad feeling with fig and her condition
"This is gonna be a great year."
Mother of Tartar Sauce
RAGH IS JUST GONE
oh my god that was an incredible episode
See you it the Tartar
#fhjy spoilers#fantasy high junior year spoilers#spoilers#d20#dimension 20#fantasy high#d20 fantasy high#dimension 20 fantasy high#fantasy high junior year
29 notes
·
View notes
Note
If you get this, answer with three random facts about yourself and send it to the last seven blogs in your notifications - anon or not, doesn’t matter. Let’s get to know the person behind the blog!
I'm allergic to peanuts, tree nuts, legumes, and coffee. And also shutting the fuck up.
I have two dogs and three cats.
Today's my last day of working an actual paid job before I'm focused full time on writing an original novel 😱
19 notes
·
View notes
Note
Your art reminds me a lot of another GHS artist! They made a ton of awesome backstory hcs for the cast but I forgot their name :( Anyhow, what are your headcanons for the cat boy himself
Thank ya sm!!! (⋈◍＞◡＜◍)。✧ i try my best to have as much fun w/ my art :33 anyways glad yuo asked about my neko zombie headcanons its time to headcanon dump about this fucking cat :333
Young adult, he has aged during his years of being in the lost world btw (i hc guests can age!!)
Ofc though its gon CHANGE physically in the interp im not gon do that stupid thing where characters are aged up in media and all that rlly changes is they get taller and grow just the tiniest fucking facial hair or something like that
Neko Zombie autstic c-ptsd system collectively he/they/it + any cat themed neos blast
Speaking of Neko Zombie's system, he has UDD!!!!!!!!! 💥💥💥 they have two "main" alters. A host and cohost!
considering both alters have completely forgotten their names, Neko Zombie has basically become a "collective" name for them.
The host is y'know, Neko Zombie. The ambitious, rebellious cat deeply determined to help anyone achieve the goal he can never, get the hell out of Gregory House.
The cohost is a prosecutor, they are responsible for Neko Zombie's "wild facade". They are completely nonverbal, only making noises of that of a aggressive cat. completely driven by instinct, anger, and an overwhleming amount of fear. They are not evil, though. Only wanting to protect the body, and survive.
The host is a transmasc enby aro lesbian and the cohost is a triple a battery (AGENDER AROACE SWAG!!!!!!!!!!)
OK fanlore wooooo
The only surviving "child" of a family who gaved Gregory House some "competition".
..if competition meant trapping lost souls in a purgatorial hell of a hotel. He had second guest type situation. Being unwillingly transported to a hotel than just after you try to escape it you're just. Interrogated into the family like a fucked up toxic found family.
The competiting hotel in question, was definitely more professional and more fancier like then gregory house. I'm saying fancier as in your room would probably look like this:
Needless to say, of course having a more high quality soul-trapping horror hotel in the lost world would ring the alarm bells of any soul-hungry rat! Well, that's what Gregory Mama thought. Already keeping her eyes on her competitor, the final straw was when one guest got out of the hotel, had their existential crisis realizing reality sucks ass, and ended up going to the COMPETING hotel!
So, she decided to take matters into Gregory's hands.
Basically, think of the process of dissolving a company into another company.
Take that litreally.
After the competiting hotel was no more, and Gregory House ended up with a few extra rooms, Neko Zombie's family's souls and any guest originating from the dissolved hotel were took out and promptly eaten by Mama.
...Though, a be a cruel mix of pity and pettyness lead to Gregory insisting that the formerly human child of the Neko family be spared. Fast foward to today with the help of a young Clock Master and here we are today with one fucked up cat!
OKAYYYY now for just more headcanons. Uh he's white + native american 2 me :3
Ironically, they were very allergic to cats as a human. Most furred animals actually. So he would have pet turtles or a goldfish maybe.....
He ended up at the hotel sometime at the early 2000s. 2001 or '02
Having your eyes and mouth sticthed shut I think it hurt like high hell to talk or blink the first few days after?? Idk
Maybe as he aged he looked more like his modren design... With the emo hair in his SE design .......
ANYWAYS!!!!!!! Tysm again i love talking about my headcanons like alot
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
NCT As Shit My Little Brother Has Said
My brother is 22 yeare old and some of the shit that comes out of his mouth is truly astounding.
Taeil: I may not be the biggest or the strongest, but I certainly am.
Johnny: (Me: can you try to not be late this time?) Look, you'll be lucky if I show up at all. Don't push it.
Taeyong: What the ACTUAL fuck is wrong with you?
Yuta: (after putting out the small fire he started by spraying down the entire kitchen) I said I'd handle it, and I'm HANDLING IT
Kun: Before we do this, I just want to point out that I said it was a bad idea.
Doyoung: Say Moth Man one more time, I swear to God.
Ten: Look, I'm secure enough in my sexuality to acknowledge when another man is attractive, and that guy was SMOKIN
Jaehyun: What do you think? Should I go for loveable dork or less loveable dork?
Win Win: You CAN hug me, but I really rather you didn’t.
Jungwoo: Oooo ground sloth.
Lucas: Duuuuuuuuude. DUUUUUUUUUUUUDE.
Mark: Perhaps I shall partake in an adult beverage.
Renjun: Hey have you ever heard of the concept of shutting up?
Jeno: Sorry, I can't be a skeleton for Halloween. I'm allergic to bones
Haechan: If she kicks it, can I move into her room?
Jaemin: (making two gummy worms touch) and SMOOCH
Chenle: I had like 14 Redbulls today and now all I wanna do is FIGHT
Jisung: I am the baby of this family and YOU WILL TREAT ME LIKE IT
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Happy Birthday
It was 3 am, and Purpled wasn't able to sleep.
He was quietly sitting in his room, petting DogChamp while he was sleeping. Purpled eyes couldn't stop staring at the date showing in his communicator, a strange feeling slowly consuming him.
7th of July.
Purpled's birthday.
He sighed, deciding to do the same he did every year: get a small cupcake, place a match on it, and eat in the early morning. It wasn't a big deal, really.
He left his little tent, heading over towards the restaurant in Las Nevadas. It wasn't open for the public yet, but it was the only place they could have access to a proper kitchen. Purpled opened the Staff Only door, hearing the strange banging of pans and someone whispering swears. Probably another resident trying to have a night snack, Purpled couldn't blame them at all. He stepped in and stopped right away.
Well, he didn't expect to see Fundy in an apron, mixing something in a bowl and an immense mess around him.
"Uh… what are you doing here?" Fundy asked, immediately noticing Purpled's presence.
"What are you baking?" Purpled asked back, not wanting to answer.
"I asked first." Fundy replied, crossing his arms.
Purples sighed, no patience for that at the moment. "I just came here to eat something. Now, you go."
Fundy's ears twitched a little before pressing against his head. "I'm… baking a cake." He muttered, going back to mixing the ingredients.
Purpled, for a split of second, got happy with the info, but quickly dismissed it. No way it could be for him, just one person knew his birthday and Fundy certainly wasn't him.
Purpled noticed orange and green food coloring placed on the table, curiosity now flooding in. "So, did you just get a craving for cake in the middle of the night?" he played as a joke, going back to his search for a single cupcake.
"Nah, man… it's my birthday." Fundy replied, still talking in a low voice.
"No way!" Purpled said before he couldn't contain himself, getting himself into a mess as soon as Fundy stared at him, confusion all over his body language.
"What do you mean by 'no way'? It's not like being born on July 7th was a crime."
Purpled pondered his answers.
He could lie, say he didn't expect it, or that Fundy shouldn't bake the cake for his own birthday, or any shitty lie like that.
"It's my birthday too." It's what came out.
Fundy's eyes widened, then a smile appeared, to Purpled's surprise.
"Dude, that's neat!" Fundy said, now moving towards the cabinets in search for something. "Your favorite color is purple, right?" He stopped for a while, and then went back for the search. "Oh Void, that was a stupid question."
Purpled was still in place, watching as the fox picked a purple food coloring and went back to the cake making, adding more ingredients. "I just need to make more batter so we can have more cake, but it will be fine."
"Wait, wait… what are you doing?" Purpled approached Fundy, watching as he divided the dough into three different recipients. "Our birthday cake." He replied, pouring each food coloring into a different bowl and starting to mix.
"So… the colors represent us?" Purpled asked, just so he could be on the same page.
"Yep."
"Orange is you, purple is me."
"Yep."
"So, who is the green one?"
Fundy went silent for a while, and then opened a sad smile.
"Back before the revolution, when it was just us in a van… we didn't have so much money for food." Purpled didn't get the connection, so he kept waiting. "So, there couldn't be two cakes at my and Tubbo's birthday."
Fundy put each batter into a different cooking pan, putting one into the oven.
"So, Wilbur would bake a single cake, two layers, one orange, the other green." Fundy smiled a little, nostalgic. "It became a tradition, even after L'Manberg came to be."
He decided to use the other ovens in the kitchen, placing the other cooking pans.
"Each year, we had our birthday together, no matter what. Even if we were angry at each other, or we had to hide from the big bad dictator. One time, I had to enter his presidential office to force him to take his head out of the papers."
Purpled just listened in silence, quite in awe. Fundy was really someone that had lived through a lot, and somehow, still held on to little comforting traditions. It must be nice, having something like that.
"But… since L'Manberg has been gone…" Fundy sighed. "I kinda haven't celebrated my birthday. I decided to try this year." He laughed quietly. "And hey! This time I have you! It's not so pathetic."
Purpled chuckled, nodding along. "Well, it's the first time I celebrate my birthday with another person. It's not pathetic."
Fundy beamed, still in a good mood, and took the cakes out of the ovens. He waited for a little while, staring at Purpled, who just stared back. "Don't you think you are going to just watch. Come here and help me."
Purpled shrugged, taking a place right beside Fundy. They stacked one cake over the other, and started to decorate.
Minutes later, they had a somewhat pretty cake.
"It works." Fundy says, after thinking a little.
"It's the first time I decorate a cake, so it's beautiful."
"Eehh… At least it will taste good. It has chocolate." Fundy pointed out.
"Aren't foxes allergic to chocolate?"
"Irrelevant ."
They finished the icing and contemplated their creation before Fundy grabbed the plate, leaving the kitchen and hoping that Purpled would follow him, which he quickly did, even if he didn’t know where.
“If I ask where are you going, will you asnwer me?”
“I mean, it’s not only our birthday, is it?” Fundy contemplated as they passed the toll booth, making Purpled think a little. Yeah, it wasn’t only their birthday.
“Hey, so… Can I call someone else?” Purpled asked, communicator in hand already.
Fundy didn’t even finish saying yes and Purpled was already typing someone’s name into his contact info, waiting for just a few seconds until the other person answered his call.
“Punz? I need you to come over. Now.”
Meanwhile, Fundy was standing in front of a wall of lava. The heat was almost uncomfortable and was definitely unwelcoming. But Fundy had to come back home before Yogurt woke up, so he had a schedule to fill.
“Yo, Tubster!”
No replies.
“Cut the scene, I know you are there!”
Still no replies.
“I can literally see your shiny armor on top of the outpost, you idiot!”
Seconds of no answer, and then the lava started to go down. And so there he was, Tubbo Underscore, with the entire glory of someone who hasn’t slept in the last 2 days. Fundy knew that look pretty well.
“Why do you have a cake?”
Not a hello or good night. But Fundy was used to that.
“Do you know what day it is today?”
“Uuuuh…… Juuuuuunee..?”
Fundy waited to see if Tubbo was joking, all that was left it was silence.
“Tubbo…. That’s a month.”
“But it's the right month.”
“No, it’s not.”
“Are you sure of that, boss man?”
Fundy just stared, kinda worried for Tubbo, cake still in hands. “Today is July 7th.”
“Hm…”
They just stood there, Fundy being able to see the cogs turning in Tubbo’s head. Finally, it clicked. “Oh fuck! Today is July 7th!”
“Yes it is!”
“It’s our birthday!”
“Yeah!!!”
“Holy shit… I haven’t celebrated it since…”
Tubbo shut, eyes unfocused. Since L’Manberg was done. Since last time, at a tiny office with the height of presidential work on his shoulders.
“I know, I haven’t either.”
They faced each other again, and it was different now. It was a look that only them could have, suffering all of that. The cramped days at the van, L’Manberg, Schlatt, New L’Manberg. They could say something about it, some apologies, some “I missed it”, but they weren’t like that.
“I have a couple of cookies and regen potions at the back. Want me to get a couple of them for us two?” Tubbo smiled a little, trying to get back to their old routine.
“It's us three. There’s another birthday boy outside.”
“Wait, who?”
Purpled conveniently walked towards Fundy’s side, giving Tubbo a little wave. “Make it four, actually.” He showed the communicator. “I called Punz, also a ‘birthday boy’” He made quote marks in the air.
“Why do so many of us have the same birthday?” Fundy asked to no one in particular. Tubbo just shrugged, but Purpled had something to say about it.
“I mean, it’s not my actual birthday. I have no idea of when my birthday would be in this world.” He casually said, antennas slightly glowing in the night. “So, I just decided to snatch Punz’”
“Dude, I wish it was this easy to change birthdays.” Tubbo said, thinking. I’d change to something like…”
“4/20.”
“Fundy, you’re a genius”
“I know.”
Purpled smiled a little listening to them talking. It was comfortable, somehow, being part of something like that, even for one night. “I should have gone for 10/10” He added to the talk, taking out some blocks and starting to build a little desk for them to place the cake, outside of both Las Nevadas and the Cookie Outpost. Tubbo laughed, thinking about other funny birthdays while automatically helping. Fundy placed the cake on top of the desk, just staring.
“Wait. We have orange, purple and green. What’s Punz’ color?”
Purpled thought about it, but Tubbo already had a solution “The icing is white. He is white. Solved.”
“I’m what?”
Punz appeared out of nowhere, probably from an enderpearl. “You’re white, like the icing.” Tubbo explained.
“Also, you’re a birthday boy.” Fundy helped.
“There’s four of us” Purpled finalized.
Punz just stared at all four, letting out a sigh and taking off his armour. "Really, Purpled? I thought you were in trouble.”
“I’m never in trouble, you should be smarter than this.”
“You just… decided to throw a party?”
Purpled shaked his head, pointing towards Fundy. “It was his idea.”
Punz looked at the other two, they were arguing over the number of candles. Fundy wanted to put only four, Tubbo wanted to put as many as it could fit. For a moment, Punz could see two different people there, fighting over stupid shit as a third one just stared, amused. It was so familiar, but so different. It hurt.
“But hey, you don’t have to stay if you doesn’t wa-”
“Get me a chair, it’s free food.”
Purpled smiled, a real one for once, and gave him a chair.
The four of them sat on the table, Fundy being the one to stood up after finally settling with a normal amount of candles on the cake.
“Ok, now we sing.”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“We ain’t singing, bossman”
“It’s sad if it's for ourselves.”
“It’s not??”
Purpled saw this banter would drag until sunrise, so he picked a bottle, catching everyone's attention.
“Lets keep it simple, boys. Happy Birthday to us.”
Punz gave him a small smile back, grabbing a potion for himself. “We made it through another year, what a win.”
Tubbo laughed to himself, joining the toast. “Still one life left, gotta keep like that until next year.”
Fundy was the last one, a grateful smile on his face. “Glad we have each other this time.”
“If the cake is good, I will come to next year’s party.”
“So it was nice meeting you, Punz.” Tubbo joked, making the rest of the table laugh a little.
And there they stayed until the sunrise slowly appeared in the distance, bathing them in a golden, lazy light.
“Damn, this was fun.”
“Not the best cake, but I’ll come back.”
“Fuck off.”
Tubbo was asleep on the table, finally able to relax. Fundy poked him, with no reaction.
“I can carry him inside, don’t worry.” Punz guaranteed, getting up.
“Thanks man, I have to go before my kid wakes up.” Fundy smiled, getting the empty cake plate.
“You have a kid?”
“Yeah, his name is Yogurt and that gremlin needs to be kept on a leash.” Purpled interrupted, earning a weak slap from Fundy. “Shut up, my kid is not a gremlin, he has just a lot of energy.”
Punz laughed, picking up Tubbo like a sack of potatoes, still with no response. “Thanks for the party, guys.”
Fundy smiled back, waving. “Happy birthday, Punz.”
“Happy birthday, boys.”
And they walked in opposite paths.
----------------------------------------
Taglist!
@a-wild-rosette @fishjuice @blipblipimafish @thenerdistrying @beepboopgalaxies (bc i know u like my writing for some reason) @geminisync (bc i want ur clout) @oakskull (bc if i press u enough u will read it <3)
#Not a commission#fundy#tubbo#punz#purpled#dream smp#HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE BIRTHDAY BOYS#hope u guys like it :D#i speedrun this
109 notes
·
View notes
Text
HAUNTED HOUSE !
HALLOWEEN TXT EDITION!
txt x neutral reader !
WARNING !: cursing! knifes! haunted house! JYP AND 6IX9INE!
a very crack and dumb one shot i made.
“MANE IF YALL DONT SHUT THE FUCK UP!” taehyun shouted as they were walking up to the line since everyone began to nag.
"this is why i wanted to go trick or treating instead." beomgyu pouted and folded his arms as he and the rest of the group waited in line to go inside of the haunted house.
well it was more like a haunted barn, where they would all get on a hayride and be driven throughout the barn and be spooked supposedly. "trick or treating?? how old are you again?" kai mocked him,
"no offense but i'm starting to think you were right when you said beomgyu was still mentally 9 years old because.. this is starting to get worrying. what 19 year old is trying go trick or treating?" yeonjun added in agreement, while taehyun shot him a dirty look for throwing shade at his best friend.
beomgyu’s first instinct was to scoot closer to (y/n), but he then fired off a clapback of his own. "the only thing that's worrying is that wig you're wearing, who the fuck are you even supposed to be? lord farquad on crack?" gyu fired back at yeonjun, who was now touching the short black bob on top of his head.
soobin couldn't help but laugh, even though it was his own boyfr- bestfriend getting flamed and soon, everybody else in the group let out laughter at gyu’s clapback. even taehyun, who couldn't stand beomgyu, was practically crying laughing at what was said.
"actually, i'm supposed to be dora," yeonjun replied, gesturing to his pink t shirt and bright orange jeans. "and soobin is.. well diego." he pulled soobin closer to him after saying that and kissed his forehead, before ruffling his blueberry curls a little.
"wait.. ain't dora and diego supposed to be cousins?" taehyun asked, his mouth curling in disgust, "i don't think that's positive..." kai added.
“cousin lovers.” (y/n) said making yeonjun smack their arm.
it was a wonder how they didn't annoy the others waiting in line for their ride, since they would fight every second. meanwhile as the group turn drew closer and closer, beomgyu found himself regretting agreeing to come here.
it was weird.. he loved horror movies, but he despised haunted houses because even though both were fake events, being in a haunted house was just so up close and personal you know?
if it wasn't for it being (y/n)'s birthday (lets just pretend ur birthday was on halloween.) beomgyu wouldn't have came, and he would have probably just stayed at home and took pictures of his costume for instagram before going over to hyunjin’s to watch scary movies.
(y/n) noticed that beomgyu looked uncomfortable amongst all of the roasts and jokes flying amongst the group and they decided to ask what was wrong.
"gyu, why do you look so sad? being sad is my job," (y/n) asked as the group continued to move up in the line. "i'm not sad," beomgyu answered. "i'm just nervous, i don't like haunted houses.. i had a really bad panic attack the last time i went to one, and i don't wanna have one and ruin your birthday or anything.. i probably should have just stayed my ass home."
"nah, you not going to ruin my birthday, you're my friend and i care about you... it won't be that scary, it's literally a haunted barn. you know what barns have? cows and chickens. now who's scared of cows and chickens? nobody. except blades of grass."
the little pep talk made gyu feel slightly calmer. "thanks," he replied, fumbling with the thick leather choker around his neck. "your costume is really cute by the way. i like the face paint."
"thanks, it was kai’s idea actually," they responded with a chipper edge to their voice. (y/n)' costume consisted of a sweatshirt and sweatpants with a skeleton printed on the front, and his face was made up to look like a skull.
after beomgyu was calm, he found himself overhearing a conversation between hueningkai, taehyun, and his knives.
"no tae, you can't bring your knives in here with you," hyuka shook his head as taehyun kept asking if he could run back to the car real quick and grab his knives "cmon kai, just in case a demon wanna try some shit"
"well.. can i get my ouija board?" tyun asked, his lips twisting into a devious smile. "i just wanna talk to the demons, it's halloween, and if it's any day i should be allowed to do this, it's today."
"ain't there no demons.. this is a barn. you wanna talk to demonic horses and shit?" yeonjun pokes in the conversation and raised an eyebrow.
"yes? of course i do, the fuck do you think i am?" taehyun whined, pointing to the devil horns on top of his head as the group finally made it to the front of the line and were waiting for the tractor to come back so that they could get on the hayride.
finally, after they all stood around and handed in their tickets to the clerk in front of the line, their tractor was ready, pulling along the hay covered cart as it came to a stop in front of the barn entrance, waiting for the group to board it.
"wait, hay? y'all ain't say there was going to be hay..." soobin complained, his skin already itching just by looking at all that hay. "y'all do know i'm allergic to hay right?"
"bitchhh, we been said it was a hayride involved," hueningkai snapped, "what you done caught the (y/n) disease where you forget everything every minutes or what?"
"aye i don't forget everything, i just be high," (y/n) cut in as they handed in their tickets to the clerk. "and i'm allergic to hay!" soobin cried out, scratching his forearm.
soobin actually is allergic to hay, but it wasn't something severe, he just got irritated by it and it caused his skin to rash up, not like his skin didn't already look as if it was full of rashes.
(that not true btw)
"oh well," hueningkai replied in a deadpan tone, shrugging. "guess you'll just die then."
after they've all handed in their tickets, everyone began to board the hay filled cart, with everyone obviously choosing to be closest to their besties.
when they got onto the cart. soobin was snuggled up to yeonjun, playing with his diego the explore backpack trying to ignore the itchy feeling the hay gave him.taehyun was resting his head on (y/n)’s shoulder, whining about his knifes, beomgyu was clinging onto kai for dear life, because he was still scared after all.
"i better not hear none of y'all screaming like no pussies after we get in here," yeonjun started after the tractor began to start up and drive them into the dark, cool barn. "how y'all gon be scared of demons when i'm taehyun a whole demon. y'all scared of him now?"
"actually, yes, i'm scared of him just a little bit," beomgyu answered, his tone groggy.
"considering he tried to kill me on multiple occasions and almost succeeded, yes yeonjun, i'm scared of taehyun and he make me fear for my life." soobin added on, slightly flinching at just saying the word taehyun.
"that was before i became positive," taehyun suddenly flashed soobin and beomgyu a toothy smile, "just like i'm positive that none of these demons or zombies or whatever the fuck is in this barn is gon' do shit to us."
"tae if you don't shut your ass up, there’s no demons in here, nor is there any zombies, they are paid actors. you wish you was in a horror movie so bad," hueningkai cut in, once again ruining tyun’s fun.
as of right now, nothing scary was going on. just the typical music playing throughout the barn, random screams, and plastic skeletons appearing out of nowhere. shit that made little kids be scared of, but anyone else wouldn't be phased. not even beomgyu was phased by what was going on, and he was the main one who was scared to come along.
but then.. things started to get more spooky. the people who were sitting on the edge would start to get grabbed and poked without warning, and people would come up on side of the cart out of nowhere and scream or otherwise bring attention to themselves, which would catch them off guard obviously, but shit like that was to be expected at a haunted house.. or in this case a haunted barn.
but soon though, things began to get downright creepy.
as they were sitting in the cart, slightly startled and caught off guard by the jumpscares, but not too shaken up, not even beomgyu was that scared, as he made sure to sit in the middle of the cart to avoid being randomly grabbed or touched by these strangers in costume, and it was just amusing to people like taehyun or (y/n), they weren't prepared for what started to happen next.
soon the music that sounded as if it was from a demonic nursery cut out mid note, and it was replaced by an old, gravely sounding voice that began to sing happy birthday very terribly and off key.
and they thought this was creepy, considering it was gus' birthday, but they considered it was a coincidence. "damn (n/n), they singing happy birthday to you, that's wild," yeonjun noticed, laughing at the 'coincidence'.
"see, i told y'all they’re really a skeleton, how else would they know that we're here for their birthday, hmm?" beomgyu added matter of factly causing the others to let out laughter.
so even though it was somewhat unsettling, it didn't become horrifying until the voice replaced "happy birthday to you," with "happy birthday (y/n)."
the place then became a chorus of "did yall hear that shit?" and "yeo what the fuck?!" after they noticed that, with (y/n) in particular being especially shook that there seemed to be a demon singing specifically to them, and their eyes went wide as the voice continued to serenade them, albeit poorly.
"see, this ain't it no more." soobin announced and hueningkai nodded in agreement. "h-how do they know it's (n/n)' birthday? much less who (y/n) is?" beomgyu asked as he held onto (y/n) even tighter than he was before. "i'm scared now."
"that's what we all want to know," yeonjun answered before reaching up to adjust his wig, before feeling nothing but his real hair tied back. he knew his wig didn't fall off or get snatched off, he had it secured with bobby pins, because it was one of his mother's wigs and he didn't want to lose it, but it had just completely disappeared.
"uh...my wig is gone," yeonjun announced and soobin just nodded. "same."
"no i mean it's for real gone... my dora or lord farquaad or whatever the fuck wig i was wearing earlier just.. disappeared into thin air." yeonjun continued to explain as he continued to search the surrounding area for it, just in case it fell out of his head but it was actually gone.
"see, i told y'all asses there were demons in here, but y'all didn’t wanna listen now y'all getting your shit taken, and demons are singing happy birthday to (y/n) and shit, and now y'all shocked," taehyun added with a huff.
"tyun, ain't no demons in here. if there were demons in here, they would do a lot worse than steal hats and wigs and sing happy birthday, believe that. they'd be torturing us psychologically, and- wait, where the fuck is my sheep hat?" hueningkai touched the top of his head, where his costume top was missing from, and now he was heated.
"yeah, we gotta get outta here."
more shit like that continued to happen with the voice continuing to reference them by name, and reference stuff that only people that know them would know, like soobin almost running someone over once, or yeonjun’s furry suit,and then, near the end of the ride, it all came together in the worst possible way.
a single echoing voice with a thick new york accent screaming "SCUUUUM GANGGGG!" followed by a laugh in the distance that sounded a lot like jyp’s laugh.
and in that moment, all of them literally hopped off of the cart and ran towards the exit.
#beomgyu#beomgyu smut#bts smut#soobin smut#smut#txt#txt smut#yeonjun smut#hueningkai#taehyun#txt x reader#txt reactions#txt imagine#kpop reactions#kpop#halloween imagine#yeonjun#soobin#choi beomgyu#choi soobin#choi yeonjun#kang taehyun#huening kai#bts#kpop imagines
157 notes
·
View notes
Text
Incorrect quotes from the smp.
Evelyn: *sends a long and felt message on how she cares about her friends*
Angelique: Are you being held at gunpoint?
..................................................................................
Adrian: *baking a cake*
Kenny: Let's write milf on the cake.
Adrian: WHY?!?!
Kenny: cause Henry said to write something you like on your cake.
………………………………………...................................
Evelyn or Henry: I have never felt more joy since I was in high school and the teacher said that my work was the best among everyone and that was the confidence boost I needed to realise I am the baddest bitch ever.
………………………………………………….......................
Kenny: I want a spicy chicken sandwich, actually two, with no fries and plain water.
Evelyn: I will strangle you!
………………………………………………….......................
Jayda: From now on I will now be known as the Cat Queen, bow down to your new ruler and hold fear in your hearts about the power I withhold.
Missy: ALL HAIL THE CAT QUEEN!!!
………………………………………………….......................
Vance: WHO THE FUCK MADE ME A FLOWER CROWN IM ALLERGIC TO POLLEN.
Angelique: I did.
Vance: Of course you fucking would.
…………………………………………………
Missy: *watching a movie* Wait, is this platonic or romantic? I genuinely can't tell the difference.
Kenny: Honestly who cares. We can't let some guy from old England tell us the difference.
…………………………………………….............................
Kenny: All in saying is that we should at least fuck our friends once just to understand the feel of it.
Anyone: I'm not having sex with you.
Kenny: >:(
…………………………………………….............................
Everyone: if there is one thing you need to know about me is that I am a sad queer kid that romanticises everything in their life but has never been held in the arms of anyone who genuinely loves me.
…………………………………………….............................
Missy: Is it just me or does the Khan Academy guy actually sound kinda hot?
Kenny: FINALLY SOMEONE FUCKING SAID IT. I'M NOT ALONE ANYMORE!!
…………………………………………….............................
Evelyn: WOULD YOU STOP PLAYING NOBODY BY MITSKI ON REPEAT!!
Kenny,through tears: I've bEeN BiG anD sMalL, AnD bIG aNd SmAll aGAin......
…………………………………………….............................
Henry: It's times like these where I wish you could just shut the fuck up.
Kenny: What I just said is that doctors can perform brain surgery while the patient is awake.
…………………………………………….............................
Evelyn: Kenny we aren't friends anymore, you're going in the DNI section of my tumblr bio.
Kenny: SHAWTY IS GIVING ME A FREE SHOUT OUT!!
………………………………………………..........................
Evelyn: Okay Jackson, you had your turn with the kitten now it's our turn.
Jackson: NO!
Henry: Give her to us Jackson.
Jackson: If any of you dare to take Kiki (his cat) I will not hesitate to place a lego piece after every step you take.
Everyone:*slowly backs away*
………………………………………………..........................
Anyone: If you ever meet a straight guy and he says he does musical theatre, that man is the biggest liar known to our generation and is living in a closet made of glass.
………………………………………………….......................
Milonia: I feel like you were a lesbian in your past life.
Missy: Oh definitely 100% agree.
………………………………………………….......................
Kenny: The reason I am so disappointed in myself is that I am a whore living in a virgin's body. I have been fucked 78 times in my head but never in reality.
………………………………………………….......................
Evelyn: I would rather get stabbed 54 times in the chest by a toothpick and pour lemon juice into my eyeballs than to share a bed with you.
Adrian, who snores way too loud: Understandable, have a good night, hope you sleep with one eye open.
………………………………………………….......................
Angelique: OMG!! I love the look you are going for today, the eyes bags from crying yourself to sleep over a boy that doesn't care about really compliments the "I didn't get enough attention as a child and now I get overly attached to people way too quickly", you're killing it!!
Vance: 🖕😐🖕
………………………………………………….......................
Lyco, for some reason: I would eat the communist manifesto.
………………………………………………….......................
Evelyn: I'm not saying I wanna die but if I was in a dark alley and someone just stabbed and left me there to die............. I wouldn't be disappointed.
Quotes from @sanderdarksides, I hope you don't the fact that I tweaked some things.
#my ocs#phantomsmp#incorrect quotes#tw strangling mention#tw sex mention#death tw#tw stabbing mention
6 notes
·
View notes
Photo
Here's a picture of my face. You're welcome.
#shut up rosie#my face#idk how active I'll be today#so have this I guess???#also television flash guy is allergic to dogs like me so that's something???#I've had only 2 hours of sleep for the past 2 days can you tell?#and I would sleep today but it's a week before and HUGE con so I have a fuck ton to do so rip#I'll let you guys know if I die later#but that just means I'm gonna have a lot of caffeine to keep me alive#I'm talking a lot wow#i don't really care#if you read this far you deserve a gold star#but also like tell me if you did because I actually wonder if people ever read my rambly stupid tags#also I'm really blown away that my one Ivy pic got so much attention???#like thank you????#I'm probs gonna reblog it again today just to see if it gets anymore notes#I'm a curious bean#I'm still talking away huh?#DID YOU GUYS HEAR WE'RE GETTING MORE WONDER WOMAN STUFF ON THURSDAY???#i'm exciiiiited#I wonder what it is#haha 'wonder' haha#okay I'm gonna stop now#this was fun#we should do this more often#I'm gonna go get coffee now#byeeeeeeeeeeee
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
Incorrect quotes again.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Smalls: Well you see, the explanation is perfectly simple and scientific. It was because shut up. Shut up is why.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
JD: I'm feeling it! What am I feeling? Death, probably.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Kingston: Sometimes I get so caught up on being gay that I forget I’m actually bi.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
JD: It's not ugly, just aesthetically challenged.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Tags: I'm a nice person, but I'm about to start throwing rocks at people.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Smalls: The risk I took was calculated but, man, am I bad at math.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Tags: I only have two emotions: exhaustion and stress. And I’m somehow always feeling both simultaneously.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Tags, digging their grave: Long story short, this is my grave.......Want me to make you one too?
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Akuma: If I can't cause tiny bits of chaos every day, I think my body will shut down.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
JD: I'm allergic to death.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
JD: Fuck capitalism. It's a rigged system that keeps us poor and it isn't fair. You shouldn't need to work three jobs to afford basic necessities.
JD, playing Monopoly: Sorry, if you wanted to win you should have tried not being poor.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Tags: What doesn't kill me better start running, because now I'm fucking pissed.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
JD: Could you maybe just like… stab me… right in the gut. Just REALLY twist it in there. ‘Cause that honestly seems less painful than this conversation.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Kingston: My dad has a spiked collar.
Kingston: *dog
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Kingston, in the hospital: Will you visit me when I get out?
Akuma: Lol nah, I hate graveyards.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Akuma: Don’t go picking a fight with me. I could make your life difficult.
Tags, sarcastically: Wow. I wonder what it’d be like to have a difficult life.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
JD: I think I need a hug...
Kingston: Good thing I'm hug shaped!
*45 minutes later*
JD: You... you can let go now.
Kingston: No, I absolutely cannot.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Kingston: My only talent is being stress.
Smalls: Don't you mean stressed?
Kingston: No.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Smalls: I can't imagine what Akuma is planning. But I can tell you two things. We won't like it and it won't be legal.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Smalls: Nice rock.
Kingston: Thanks, Tags gave it to me.
Tags: I threw it at you!
Kingston: Isn't he the sweetest?
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
JD: Last night I found out Kingston is a sleep talker.
Akuma: Oh, really?
JD: "The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell." Right. In. My. Ear. At 3am.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
JD: *sneaking in through their window*
Kingston: *turning in his chair and flicking the light one* You want to tell me where you've been all night?
JD: I was with Tags?
Tags: *turning in his chair* Wanna try again?
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
JD: I know we’re not exactly friends, but-
Kingston: What do you want?
JD: I've been stuck with Smalls for 2 weeks and he's been drinking all the soy sauce.
JD: Help.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Smalls: Is there anyone here who’s actually straight?
JD: *raises hand*
Kingston: *puts her hand down*
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Akuma: Kingston and I were crossing the street, and this man drove by and honked at us.
JD: What did you do?
Akuma: They chased him to the next red light, and reached into his window, and-
Kingston: *walking in* Who wants a steering wheel?
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Tags: I just found out from JD today that when Akuma died and the service did the 21-gun salute at his funeral, Kingston said, “They should aim at the coffin to be sure.”
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Smalls: So anyways have y'all seen Tags?
JD: I think they went in Kingston's room 'studying'.
Akuma: Doubt that. I heard groans there.
*Meanwhile in Kingston's room*
Tags & Kingston, fighting:
1 note
·
View note
Last Seen Blogs
