somebody please talk to me about sneeg im going fucking insane

chewing on you

Okay, whatever floats your boat 😂

Just went to your profile and found out this was an Ambien Thing™️. Happens to the best of us lol. I hope you got some good rest!

there's something to be said about death, about the lasting impact you have on people when you take that last breath. while some people have some knowledge of exactly how that's going to touch those that loved them, i don't think anyone ever really knows how deep that really goes, how far reaching that circles goes - regardless of whether they've lost people before.

(long post so under the cut)

TLDR; Not okay, would love some asks or something to help distract me from everything going on (i'm getting to the ones in my notifications tonight if i can) but i may end up having to take a hiatus.

i sit here now, typing this up at 1 in the morning, unable to sleep tonight because my mind cannot stop racing yet feeling like it's moving through molasses, cannot stop thinking about technoblade - no. alex. i can't stop thinking about him and all the good he did, how he was taken far too young, how life isn't fair, and how some people, like my family, don't seem to understand that it is, in fact, possible to get attached to celebrities like this.

but in reality, it's not just him, is it? no. it's my brain's inability to properly grieve. it's my family dog that i'd had since 2009 that died from sarcoma last september, it's my fiance's sibling who died from far too many cancers to list at only 15 in january. alex, for some reason, was what kicked my brain into gear. i have been in shutdown mode since that video went up. i have been crying, sobbing off and on all day. and now i can't sleep, no matter how hard i try. i've taken my xanax - 2mg, for those curious - and i sit here, staring at my wall, and it's a fruitless venture and i know it. sleep isn't coming. neither are the tears, but solely because i've cried so much that there is nothing left.

i am suffering, truly suffering right now. and the only one i knew really personally was my dog. so that makes me think about what alex's friends feel like right now, how they're doing - are they okay? are they eating? are they sleeping? - and it's making me think about just how much my fiance has been hiding from me about their grief. and i feel so useless.

if god exists, why do i still feel like this?

Sometimes I wish we would start calling out the performative radicalism on this site for the poser bullshit it is. "Remember, it's always morally correct to kill a cop!" "Don't forget to firebomb your local government office!" "Wow, it sure would be a shame if these instructions on how to make a molotov cocktail got spread around!"

Okay. But you're not killing cops or firebombing government offices. You are posting on a dying microblogging website to a carefully-curated echo chamber that has radicalized itself into thinking that taking the absolute most extreme position on any subject is praxis but that anyone discussing the most practical way to effect actual change is your sworn enemy. You do not have the street cred OR the activist cred to be talking about killing cops, babe.

Everyone wants to talk about how Senshi is a tumblr sexyman but...Senshi is actually attractive. Like even aside from the fact that he's pretty good-looking he's a nice, sweet guy and he can cook and loves doing it. He's a perfectly eligible candidate for marriage, which kind of goes against the spirit of a tumblr sexyman.

Chilchuck, however? Chilchuck is a tumblr sexyman. What the fuck do you people see in him

can't believe we're all adults being forced into the club penguin level of censorship in 2024

EVERY SINGLE DAY there are MILLIONS of characters in their late 20s who get falsely accused of being father figures to teenagers when in reality the description of "weird older cousin" or "step-sibling that moved out before you were born" is 1000000x more apt

personal rules for winter ❄

We are well beyond canary in the coalmine warning levels with the way trans people and particularly trans women are treated on this site.

Maybe you've heard the metaphor of allowing wolves and sheep to share the same space, welcoming everyone. You end up with just wolves because allowing them in that space makes it unsafe for any sheep. Or the story about how a nazi goes into a dive bar and is refused service. The bartender then explains to someone else at the bar that if you serve them once they tell their friends and before you know it you're the nazi bar they all go to and normal customers don't feel safe.

Terfs and other bigots are seeing these targeted harassment campaigns succeed against trans women and rejoicing. They see Tumblr ban them and officially stand by those decisions as endorsement for their harassment. It's a sign to bigots across the internet that Tumblr is a good place for them.

And what's more is that a lot of us probably don't realize just how much trans women contribute to Tumblr. The women banned recently were sources of site-wide memes and posts I wasn't even aware originated from them.any years old memes and references can be traced back to trans women on this site.

How many of these folks have to be removed before this is no longer a site you want to be a part of it? Sure you cultivate your own experience, but you can't follow or interact with people who aren't here. And if I wanted to interact with the nazis and terfs I'd go to reddit.

I encourage everyone to reblog this. Trans women shouldn't have to be the only ones speaking out against the bigotry they're experiencing. They shouldn't be the only ones risking their blogs being nuked by staff. We have to stand with them.

(2012 minecraft parody voice) I am mining... there are no blocks of sand.... you are digging down with me.... hand in unbreakable hand... and I hope we mine.... I hope we both mine.......

I must not respond to the bad take. Responding to the bad take is the mind-killer. Responding to the bad take is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face the bad take. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past, I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the bad take has gone there will be nothing. Only I (and my good takes) will remain.

fionna and cake but simon drops increasingly wild anecdotes about his life

Whew, got a little bit of time before going back to the grind (middle of the week my beloathed) anyone want to send in some asks while I am taking a break?

consider the sperm whale and the squid. an ancient rivalry that dates back millions of years. we know the whales eat the squids. we know the squids do not make it easy for them. we know this because of the scars the whales carry, scars on the outside of their body, and on the inside as well. how badly must you want something to endure wounds inside your mouth? inside your gut?

consider the whale, who is harmed by what sustains her. consider the squid, whose flesh is soft and delicious but refuses to go down easy.

did you know? if you do your laundry you can get your clothes back

me lately once again