Charlie: Dads? I'm Bisexual
L煤cifer: Oh, Bisexual? I thought I named you Charlotte! :D
Alastor: Ugh! Really? And you dare call yourself a father! Allow me to show you how it's done!
Alastor: Hi, Bisexual! I'm Aroace, pleasure to make you acquaintances! >:D
Charlie:
Charlie: I think I'll go back to bed, proud of you, Al...
Poor Charlie is stuck in a eternal loop of dad jokes. Save her!
@mikka-minns ? May I tempt you with some Queerplatonic Radioapple being cringe co-parents to Charlie?馃憖馃憖
@madamealtruist
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GODDAMNIT
man, I was just scrolling and now I'm a goddamn Raidioapple shipper what the FUCK
Ok ok-
And now I'm going to elaborate just because.
I was expecting someone out there to ship Lucifer and Alastor the second I heard Hell's Greatest Dad. I mean- two people singing/arguing over being father figures? Sounds gay to me /pos. The internet sure does love it's enemies to lovers (me included. I'm hopless lmao.)
BUT. I have specifics for this ship.
I hate it when people just look at Alastor's aromanticism/asexuallity and just go "nah. I'm just gonna do it anyways." I used to headcanon Alastor as complete aroace in the sense that he just can't feel that way for someone (this is not meant to sound like "oh he can't love anyone :( he's incapable" I mean specifically a romantic/sexual relationship.) Then fucking short ass king of hell arrives, and Alastor just IMMEDIATELY chooses violence.
I didn't think much of that besides "oh that's a little interesting," and then I stumbled across Radioapple and had to take a double take. My brain needed to figure out how that would work, like how it would start, flourish, ineract, yadda yadda-
.....so now I consider Alastor Demiromantic-
(I'm still goddamn writing jeez-)
Read on if you like random people looking wayyyyyy too much into fictional characters.
Headcanon timeeeeeeeee
When Lucifer and Alastor first meet, Alastor is surprised Lucifer doesn't know who he is. Up to this point, everyone knows about the terrifying radio demon, so it must be a little weird for someone to be completely ignorant to his existence. Especially when that person should probably know the ins and outs of what's going on- ....because he's the fucking king of hell.
This is something new for Alastor. It made him curious. When you're curious, you try to learn more right? So, Alastor starts pushing Lucifer's buttons, seeing how he reacts. On Lucifer's end, Alastor's just being a smug asshole. However his true intentions are information on the esteemed oh-so-powerful king of hell. Maybe Alastor doesn't quite know where this fascination comes from, but regardless he wants to learn more. I can picture him progressively bothering Lucifer more and more (this is his unique way of getting to know him semi-discreetly)
As well as figuring out what ticks him off, Alastor would also probably passively learn things Lucifer likes. For instance, he finds out what Lucifer's favorite alcoholic drink is or something- bare with me- Let鈥檚 say Lucifer has a rough day, and it's very clear to everyone in the hotel. While he's frustrated in his own room, he hears a knock at the door. Answering it, he finds his aforementioned favorite drink. At this point, he wouldn't know who left it. But after a while, he'd be able to figure out it's Alastor through process of elimination. (This is inspired by a comic I saw! :))
Now we've got Alastor trying to discreetly be kind to Lucifer, and Lucifer is aware without his knowledge. And Lucifer would call him out for it lmao. Slowly, they'd start acting friendlier towards each other. It would take a long, long time though. The slowest slow burn of them all. They'd hang out more, do things, kick angel ass, have friendly banter, do stuff with Charlie. Untill Alastor finally realizes that he might have a crush on Lucifer. Though, I feel he'd take a while to fully figure that out, do some soul searching, maybe go to Rosie for advice.
Then they'd confess. Or they wouldn't lol. I can totally see them going on what is essentially a date, even though they just consider it "hanging out". It would be a quiet relationship. Something you'd miss if you aren't looking for it, but it is there. They both just need someone they can rest with in my opinion.
These ideas are probably sporadic and nonsensical- but I 鉁笍don't care鉁笍 I just needed to rant about the old timey deer man and the short depressed apple gremlin.
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Teaser for upcoming Lucifer x f!reader smut
"You, are terrible." You push him away gently, and he follows your hands with a childish frown he doesn't even bother to conceal.
"If I ask nicely enough can we stay?" He leans back against the back of the sofa, puffing out his chest in the way he knew you loved. "I'm not a Saint, I don't think I can make it through a meal with you looking like this."
"Like what?" You ask deftly, enjoying toying with him as you begin fastening your heels.
"Like I could just eat you up." You immediately know what he's insinuating, and the point is only proven more with the way he cups his chin with his hand as he watches you, fingers placed purposefully either side of his lips. Anyone else wouldn't pick up on the concealed gesture, but you know him better, and you narrow your eyes at how hard he was chipping away at your resolve.
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Chrollo doesn't understand why you don't react to him the same way you do to the books you read. To him, you groan and look away before doing everything in what little power you have to move away from him, but while reading those books, you flush and giggle adorably, smile plastered on your face for a considerable amount of time.
When he pins you to the wall while conversing, you're quick to duck under his arm and get away with a quite random excuse, but reading about the same gesture being done by the male lead in a book makes you sigh happily. Is his execution wrong? Should he flirt with you more? The previous try at that had been a disaster with you calling him creepy.
Maybe he should slowly work his way up, classify the gestures and actions into categories of teasing and more intimate. He could start testing the waters with the former and slowly work up to the latter, making the eventual victory of finally, finally getting you to flush and fluster with a non-sexual act all the more sweeter.
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