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angelbaby-fics · 1 year

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Daddy's Baby Day

Pairing: Cg!Bucky x Little!Reader x Flip!Steve

Word Count: 820

A/N: It ain't much but its honest work! No really, it feels really good to finish something again!! I was sort of unsure about writing one of my cg characters as little for the first time & I'm still not totally sure if I'm very good at it but I just thought this idea was so cute & my little 40s boys have been heavy on my mind lately 😌💕 Enjoy! And I love you guys!!! 💕💕

You and Bucky were sitting on the floor, building castles with your wooden blocks, when you both heard the front door slam. The bang of the door into its frame sent your tower tumbling to the floor, but you only giggled at the chaos. You were in a good mood that day; Steve, however, was not.

Steve immediately stormed into his and Bucky’s bedroom, slamming that door as well. You looked up at Buck with worry in your eyes, but his comforting smile let you know he’d make sure everything was okay. Bucky got up and knocked on the bedroom door, while you remained on the floor, monitoring the situation from a distance. When the door opened slightly and Bucky slid in, you inched closer to try and hear the conversation from behind the now again closed door. You couldn’t hear very well, but from what you could gather, Steve had once again been underestimated for his stature, and he came home feeling dejected and insecure, like he did on far too many days.

You knew how he felt. Being little, many people often assumed you couldn’t do things for yourself, that you always needed help. You didn’t really mind, though, you liked being helped out, especially by your daddies. But Steve wasn’t little, he was a caregiver, so instead of feeling comfy and calm when someone tried to assist him without asking first, it made him feel helpless and small.

‘That’s it!’ you realized.

Maybe being small is exactly what Steve needed. He spent so much of his time working hard to prove himself, denying help and pushing himself just for the sake of others. That’s how you’d felt before finding yourself in the care of Steve and Bucky, so maybe that’s what Steve really needed; not help, but care.

Confident in your reasoning, you got up from the floor and set off on a mission. In your bedroom, you had a little basket of all sorts of pacifiers, as your daddies liked to spoil you. You grabbed one, a blue one with stars that you thought Steve would like, as well as one of the soft blankets from your bed, and made your way to your daddies’ room. You could still hear them talking as you approached, the stress obvious in Steve’s voice as Bucky tried to calm him down. You knocked softly, but they couldn’t hear you, so you quietly let yourself in. The tension in the room immediately dissipated as soon as Steve and Bucky saw you enter.

“Hiya, angel,” Steve said, exhaustion radiating from him. Despite this, he still held his arms out for you, never letting his caregiver persona falter in front of you. For now.

You reached up with the pacifier, attempting to put it in Steve’s mouth for him.

“What’s this, baby?” Steve asked, subtly dodging the pacifier and taking it in his hand instead.

“Paci makes me feel better. Maybe it helps daddy feel better too?” You responded.

“Aw, thank you sweetie, but daddy isn’t a baby like you.” Steve said with a hint of sadness in his voice.

“Well… maybe daddy can be a baby if you want to. Daddy can have a baby day, too.”

“Daddy can’t be a baby, he’s gotta take care of you, huh?” Steve chuckled, mussing up your hair.

“That's what Baba’s for! Baba takes care of baby AND daddy-baby! Right Baba?” You asked, pleading eyes staring holes right through Bucky’s heart. And to his surprise, Steve was looking at him just the same way.

Bucky started internally kicking himself. How many times had Steve secretly needed this and didn’t have the courage to ask? How many times had Steve been on the verge of regression himself, but never gave himself the permission? The love Bucky felt for you was the same love he felt for Steve; the most important thing to him was knowing that the both of you felt that love.

“Of course, my little loves!” Bucky replied, placing a hand on each of yours and Steve’s cheeks.

You could see Steve smile softly as he let himself relax, even just a fraction. Regression was new for him, despite having these feelings in the back of his mind, he’d never let himself entertain them. Steve quickly realized he felt lost, the combination of being little and being inexperienced in this littleness setting in at the same time, both of them building on each other. Steve’s smile dropped, and his cheeks flushed bright red.

“I-I don’t know how…” He whispered, his voice shaking, not nearly as strong and confident as it usually was.

“That’s okay, Stevie, I teach you!” You exclaimed, and Steve perked up at your little nickname for him.

“Okay.” He said, and you took that as a sign to wrap your cozy blanket around his shoulders. Immediately, the tension evacuated his body, as Steve let himself feel cared for for the first very time.

#steve x little!reader #steve rogers x little!reader #daddy!bucky #daddy!stucky #daddy!stucky x reader #daddy!stucky x little!reader #little!steve #little!steve rogers #pre serum steve x reader #pre serum steve x little!reader #little!reader #marvel agere #agere fic #chloe's fic

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vrisrezis · 7 months

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omgomgomg would you do satoru, suguru, and shoko taking care of a child. (maybe a random child that they found bc they tend to pick up random children or a bio kid) like have you seen those pov tiktoks like "pov: you got pregnant in collage and now your baby's being raised by college students" or somthing. like i can imagine satosugu teaching (if its a boy) the kid to be a gentlemen and like open the door for auntie shoko! or somthing like that. and if the kid was girl, like keeping her away from the boys "cuz thats what dads do" or smth like that.

INGOOGN TO CRY RN

Tw for child abuse; erm this is a college au but curses and jujutsu sorcerers still exist

- Satoru is the one to find you. At this point in his life, he knows he shouldn’t keep adopting more children. Especially when he’s a teenager. He already has megumi, suguru recently found mimiko and nanako, but the male couldn’t resist. You were littered in bruises and cuts when he found you. You looked no more than three years old. There’s no way he in good conscious could leave you there and not take you for himself. So he crouched down to meet your level, a grin etched his features despite the worry he felt for you. As if he wanted to reassure you.

- he asks you about your parents, and you give him a honest shrug. So he takes you in for now.

- “Satoru…” suguru trails off, seeing yet another child in his arms. However, suguru doesn’t dwell on it, seeing the state you’re in. “Oh jeez…” he trails off, his motherly instincts kicking in as he’s quick to grab shoko to help heal you up.

- even shoko, would show great worry towards you.

- and from then on, you were stuck to those three like glue. Nothing would separate you four. They were stuck with you, you were stuck with them.

- satoru would eventually figure out that your parents were dangerous curse users that seemed to have put you in that weak state, so him and suguru personally went out to see them :)

Now, the parental experience:

- naturally, satoru and suguru have a very different way of raising a child. Suguru raises you to be a upstanding citizen while satoru raises you to be a menace to society. As a result, you will be a very confused little lad for a long time.

- satoru is a clingy dad, spending as much time with you as possible. However, satoru keeps you away from curses energy/curses talk all together. He wants you to experience being a child, since he never really got to.

- satoru introduces you to sweets really quickly (duh), and is a terrible influence cause he is constantly giving you junk food and therefor teaching you bad eating habits

- he also just spoils the hell out of you, so when it comes to you he can never say no to you, so you need to be taught by the others you won’t always get what you want

- satoru teaches you how to be confident, if you’re ever unsure about something he builds you up! But honestly with how much he does and with how over the top he is about it, you’ll probably end up with an ego like his

- satoru also doesn’t see a reason for you to respect your elders and this includes himself, suguru, and shoko. Respect them because they’re good to you, not because they’re authority figures or older than you.

- dresses you up :} you are not going out looking like shit, ever! He is such a diva and therefor you will be too. It’s just the order of things.

- suguru is a loving father as well, but not nearly as clingy as suguru. He lets you have your space, as he knows he needs his every once in awhile.

- suguru had a habit of spoiling you, but he does know he needs to discipline you (unlike satoru) if you do something bad. He’s the stricter of the two but even then he is not very strict.

- suguru tries to teach you good eating habits, good etiquette, and overall being a polite person that does things for others.

- while suguru believes confidence is a good thing for you to have, and he certainly uplifts you when you feel insecure, satoru is way more dramatic about it.

- sugurus “of course your big and strong, cute too.” vs satorus “you’re a god compared to them, don’t let those dirty rags get to you.”

- suguru ofc wants you to respect your elders too so he’s actually very strict about this. He will not budge on it, satoru shut up.

- suguru helps you with hygiene a lot since you’re still very little and your old family didn’t really teach you. He helps with ur hair and brushing ur teeth and showering heehee

- also can I say they are both so supportive of uuu

- like , your four years old , you are a little boy , you want to cosplay peach ? Zelda ? No problem they’re both so supportive of it

- no makeup tho ur too young

- born a girl ? Wanna wear boyish clothes? Totally fine they also don’t care

- either way tho satoru plays Barbie with u

- so does suguru but satoru plays more bc he is a #barbiegirl

- suguru is more into bratz tbh

- ofc they’re supportive of longer hair and other things too ! :D they love u

- satoru does encourage violence but only when it’s necessary ok . Fight back . Don’t start fights tho. (Secretly tho he’s telling u to start fights, it would be funny)

- suguru yells at him everytime tho

- satoru tends to be affectionate through gift giving, as he’s very bad with expressing his love through his words. Suguru is the opposite. While of course he likes to buy you things he doesn’t nearly as much as satoru, sugurus love often expressed through his vocal cords.

- aunt shoko is a fun aunt can I just say?

- your parents are so protective even if they are chill, so having your even chiller aunt shoko around is amazing

- you can talk to her about anything cuz she won’t rat you out to your dads, she won’t get mad at you, she’s just so understanding

- plus it always helps she has banger advice.

- she also knows how to take care of you a lot better when you’re a lot younger, like satosugu don’t know what they’re doing at first lmao

- shoko helping you with any boo boo’s :,(

- satoru has a habit of buying you two matching clothes so to piss him off shoko buys you clothes to match with her and he’s like >:(

- shoko NEVER smokes around you, in fact you probably don’t even know she does it

- she likes doing your hair

- when you get old enough though she is gonna be the reason you smoke your first blunt just sayin

- she kinda just starts being mama shoko instead of aunt shoko but … u didn’t hear that from me

- she helps you learn a lot of school shit since obviously given the financial situation, satosugu can’t take you into school right away, but shoko is there to help you learn for the time being :)

- doesn’t matter if your a boy she’s giving you a little pink bow to wear

- she likes just being a cool aunt ok

- anyways these 3 r soo good to u they will kill anyone that hurts u

#suguru x reader #geto x reader #geto x you #geto x y/n #satoru gojo x you #satoru gojo x reader #gojo x reader #gojo x you #gojo x y/n #shoko x reader #shoko x you

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brighttears · 1 year

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Puppy

Joel Miller x reader

No physical description, no use of y/n, gender neutral

Summary: Now that Joel had discovered what he was missing, he can't get enough of you (you turn Joel into a soft and squishy mess)

Word count: 783

Warnings: mention of sex, kind of pet name? (Puppy)

A/n: I got an ask about love languages and I’m going to do a full thing for that but I’ve had this lil thing lying around for a while and it hits a lot of the bases so i figured i’d post it on its own

—

Physical affection is not something people associate with Joel. He hadn’t either, until you—he hadn't realized that he'd been deprived of it until he drank your water. Like anyone dying of thirst, though, he needed to start slow. First, just with a few drops on his lips, then sips, and then he could have as much as he wanted.

His first few drops were nothing more than the sight of you, taking you in every chance he got. As soon as he got that taste, it was over. The air is thicker in your atmosphere, any sound other than you is dulled, he cannot multitask when you’re in the room. It took him an unusually long time to talk to you and he’d never approached someone with such nervousness, but it was impossible to stay away. He sipped in your voice, your laugh, the way you said his name, he savored your every word. He swished the memories of you in his mouth in between your meetings, organized just for you and him because he needs you entirely and all to himself, also because he was starting to get looks from Tommy and Ellie, who’d spotted the change in his and your body language. Joel wasn’t ready for anyone else to know, he wasn’t ready for the purity of the relationship, and the time he owned to think of you later on, to be spoiled with pokes and teasing.

And then, you were his, as he was yours. He had belonged to you from the second he saw you, but now he could tell you. Once the dam was broken the desire to swim in you filled him up. That’s when he learned about touch.

The first time was scary and unsure and you let him take his time. You only waited for him to submerge himself, but it didn’t take him long.

A quick stroke of your cheek moved into circling thumbs on your hands, locking pinkies, then to soft embraces, then longer ones, then the lips, and then he put them all together and it was off to the races.

He let himself dawdle on you, often stalling, asking “one more” for every 5 goodbye kisses. He needed the extra seconds to make up for the time had to sit on his hands when you were in the company of others, which was his own fault, but still, after months, he wasn’t ready to share the You that belonged to him and the time he spent with you.

You’d found a private spot where you could lounge in grass under stars. You also found that this was the best place for your secret sex. It was the most romantic thing Joel had ever experienced. Sure he’d cleverly organized dates for some private time in his youth, but they’d never been like this, because he’d never been in this kind of love.

You made sure to let him know that every inch of your body, heart, and soul were his and only, and he couldn’t help proving to you that he was yours just the same. The first time he told you he’d follow you to the ends of the earth, you’d begged the star that hung above you that it was true.

It takes a few long, regretful moments for Joel to drag his hand from yours, savoring the curves and creases of your palm on his fingertips. He gets so caught up in you every damn time you meet, and leaving, even if it's just across the way and only for the night, still hasn’t gotten any easier. He can never get enough of you.

“I’ll see you in the morning, Joel.”

“I’ll see you in my dreams.” At any other point in time, Joel would have guffawed at the notion of such a cliche sentence leaving his mouth in full seriousness, and he was aware of this, but what could he say? You’d turned him into this soft mess, and he loved it.

“Aw shucks, puppy, you kill me when you tell me things like that.”

“Well don’t make me say somethin’ cornier than ‘see you in my dreams’ or I’ll puke. One more kiss before I go, though, darlin’.”

“Just one more.” he adds after five. You give him an extra two.

“Ok, I’m shutting the door, go get your beauty sleep.”

Once again, he could come up with the most sickeningly corny reply but your lips have put him in a daze, so all he says is “Goodnight.” and sways on your doorstep with a plump and red cheeked smile.

#the last of us #the last of us fic #joel the last of us #the last of us fanfiction #the last of us hbo #joel miller the last of us #tlou #tlou fanfiction #joel tlou #tlou hbo #joel miller tlou #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller fan fiction #joel miller fluff #joel miller fic

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crabonfire · 2 years

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unsure if it’s been done before, or if you’re comfortable with it, but mercs as parents ? :]

the way I gasped when I saw this bcs omg yes!!!! mercs as parents babeyyy B)

Mercs as parents!

characters: all mercs!!

warning: none!! some are a tiny bit sad but still hapy

NOTE!!! sorry this is very...long overdue. when exams came out I just got writers block, I had to focus on exams...thank god they are ending in a couple days GAHSHHDHDHFHF

also some are shorter than others...m very sorry bbg :(

♡Scout♡

• aw

• I don't know this is honestly really cute

• he has some... Doubts. Like any parents do, but seeing the happiness on your face and your child(ren) s face whenever you talk to him? that makes all the worry go away baby.

• such a good dad. he smothers them with love and affection, definitely pretends to be santa claus on Christmas (if you celebrate it) and teaches those kids to be tough.

• DEFINITELY takes them out to play baseball. your kids are baseball fans take it or leave it.

• I really don't have much to say other than the fact he'd be a great dad, I think this will teach him a lot about himself and make him a better person, I love dad scout.

♡Soldier♡

• I feel like he'd be a bit too aggressive on the child(ren) at first, not understanding how fragile they can be until he really sees them.

• he's much more gentle and quiet around them, trying his best not to scare them.

• I think he has some gender role problems to deal with, so talk through it with him.

• but anyways, he's a great dad honestly. he cradles them and plays with them everyday, making sure that they are always happy.

• he may not understand much of a child's need or their limits, and you two may fight about that. But understand that he will definitely learn, give him time, he is trying his best.

• he's not good at comforting, but he's great at pep talks and hyping his kids up!!!

• he teaches them to be brave and strong, telling them stories from when he was in war. Its all fake, but who cares honestly.

• overall decent dad, just needs to change some of his habits.

♡Pyro♡

• WOAHHH

• Super understanding parent.

• I feel like he went through a ton as a child, explaining why he acts childish sometimes, so I think he's be a very understanding parent when it comes to his kids.

• very patient, and fun!!

• I bet for a fact that the kids love him, spoils them a shit ton.

• he loves to draw with them, putting their drawings up in your shared bedroom so he can admire them when he wakes up.

• he's a bit doubtful of his ability to parent, he thinks he's a bit too unprepared. But as long as your here, he's not too worried.

gosh I love pyro

♡Demo♡

• this guy was SO PUMPED when you two decided to have kids

• but oh boy is he anxious.

• he will not drink ever around them.

• he's quite sweet to his kids, calling them lad or lassie, along with cute ass nicknames because he just loves them so much.

• loves to hug them and carry them whenever you go out, piggy back rides, princess carry, whatever it is, he loves it.

• he likes to mess around with them a lot, and probably the type of dad to go with their kids dumb ideas even though they might go horribly wrong or are just stupid.

• he loves his family. does he think he's a bad parent sometimes? Yeah, but every parent does. You just give him a hug and he'll forget all about it.

my man fr!

♡Heavy♡

• i love misha :( my big mercenary man misha:((( I love him sm....

• gosh I'm smiling as I'm typing this ok

• he's the best dad ever.

• he's strict, of course he is. but you've seen this man in the comics, he knows when to let loose.

• he cooks for them everyday, making them school lunches, teaches them Russian, and teaches them to defend themselves if it needed to be done.

• he's also so sweet, and he tells you and his kids he loves them everyday. Heavy is not embarrassed, why should there be a need to be embarrassed? He loves you guys.

• he loves to read them stories before bed, and he loves to give them bear hugs and carry them.

• when the kid(s) saw him, he was scared that the kid(s) would be scared of him. But when they hugged him and gave him a bright smile, he melted into a puddle and chuckled, giving them a forehead kiss.

is the reason I love heavy because my dad left me for 7 years of my life and even as he came back he still didn't give me affection till this very day? maybe. but we'll never truly know.

♡Engie♡

• Hshdhdhjfjfjfj men. I LOVE. MEN.

• ueeuueue....ue...:(...ueue,,,uee!!! ;(((

• so...so sweet. MAN.

• calls them all sorts of nicknames.

• this man has never had any doubt in his life.

• he will kiss, hug, carry, cradle, comfort, just smother them with so so much love.

• makes inventions for them, and if any of them are ever interested in engineering his heart will explode due to happiness.

• he spoils those mfs so much you gotta tell him off sometimes. He's honestly so sweet it hurts.

• he will take so many pictures, and have them on both a physical album, and one he keeps in a camera he made himself. So that incase one is lost, he still has the other.

• I...I don't know man. He's the perfect dad. I genuinely don't know what else to write.

engie..kiss me challenge? UM...sir why do you as a man have cute lips? for me to kiss them? whore

♡Medic♡

• hell nah.

• he probably just wants one kid, he thinks more than one is a mistake LMAOOOO

• he's not very affectionate, not that he doesn't want to be, but he's scared to overwhelm the child.

• overall tho, he's actually quite sweet.

• he'll leave the affection up to you, but of course he will spend time with the kid...its his kid too after all 💀

• he likes to call them nicknames too, and likes to ruffle their hair a lot.

• probably will only bond with their kid over scientific stuff or whatever the kids into, he has to tone down the insanity a bit, but they are sweet together. The kids a bit messed up like he is to be honest, and he finds that endearing.

"Papa look!! I drew an anatomically accurate heart! Do you like it?"

"Oh mein gott, zhis is quite beautiful! The detail... Amazing work mein schatz :) ruffles their hair "

• he doesn't understand or relate to children much, but he tries, he really does. He will spend days trying to find a solution to make your child feel better if they were ever sad. He's a good dad, and he will try to be the best if he can.

aww he's so baby girl

♡Sniper♡

• aw baby girl

• definitely has a lot of doubts, but he's happy.

• like medic, probably just wants one kid.

• if it was a girl he'd definitely call them "daddy's little girl"

• he's always smiling around them, they just make him so happy.

• he's honestly struggling every day, having to ask you for comfort or advice on if he's doing it right. Doing what right you ask? Parenting.

• but just be there with him through it all, he's a great dad just anxious.

• he talks to his kid about how to survive in the wild, showing them his collection of cool yet a bit weird stuff from his past work experiences. Some are a bit...too weird. Remind him to not show the kid the animal eyes he has in a jar from that one time he fought off a radioactive iguana.

• him and the kid get along pretty well, to be honest...he's starting to change his mind about only having one kid.

♡Spy♡

• sobs

• he doesn't want to...at first.

• well,,,he doesn't want to mess up like he did before. How he left scout, left his past behind, he doesn't want to do that to you because of his cowardness.

• but in the end, he loves you, and he loves the child, so he will try his best.

• he's a great father, have you seen him in that one Christmas comic?

• he will smother that child with love and gifts, and will train them to be kind at a young age.

• he's still extremely doubtful of his ability, but just comfort him. he's doing great, he just can't seem to understand that right now.

• but he's sweet, he loves them, and you, and isn't embarrassed to admit it (like misha!!!)

• he's a bit distant from the child at first, but as time goes by it'll all be fine. he doesn't want to hurt his child, not again.

sobs. Great dad, major issues.

done!!!

YAY!! sorry I haven't written in months,,exams.

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watchmenanon · 1 year

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'Stranger Things 3's' teenage purgatory

Hunter Ingram StarNews Staff

[WARNING: This story contains mild spoilers from "Strangers Things 3." Only read if you have watched the new season or don't mind being spoiled.]

Being young, gay and confused about what it all means can feel like the weight of the world bearing down on your shoulders.

For Will Byers, that internal crisis is only amplified as the actual fate of the world sits on his shoulders and his soul – yet again – in Netflix’s “Stranger Things 3,” the third season of the wildly popular nostalgia-tinged sci-fi series.

In many ways, Will (played with earnest emotion and incredible range by Noah Schnapp) is the heartbeat of the beloved series. Sure, superhuman Eleven (Millie Bobby Brown), who now has two evil KOs under her belt, is the breakout of the show. But it’s Will who acts as the story’s catalyst, having first been pulled into the Upside Down in season one and forever branded with a connection to the grim parallel dimension.

Yet, there’s another element of Will’s story that informs what has become a near-constant fight to understand who he is – it’s possible Will is gay.

It’s a notion that was briefly hinted at in the first season, sparking plenty of online theorizing and postulating about whether or not the shy teen’s journey to another dimension and back was all one big metaphor for the internalized struggle of coming to terms with one’s own sexual identity.

That theory is given its best credence yet in season three's third episode, when Will’s best friend, Mike (Finn Wolfhard), puts him down in an argument over their friendship and girls by blurting out it's not his fault Will doesn’t like them.

It's a jarring but fleeting moment between the two strained BFFs, one followed with a few seconds of silence as they process the once-unspoken truth now suddenly voiced out loud.

Mike wields this information as a weapon, not because he doesn't accept Will, but as a selfish defensive measure. He apologizes, but Will still retreats to his once-safe space, Castle Byers, only to realize its yet another reminder of the childhood and the innocence that has been stolen from him repeatedly.

Through tears and screams (again, Schnapp is incredible), he takes a baseball bat to his hideaway and tears a picture of him and his friends to shreds – and who can blame him?

Will has been kidnapped and sent to another dimension, rescued and returned home only to be possessed by the very darkness that imprisoned him and then subjected to an exorcism. Through it all, it was his family, friends and those endless days crowded around the table playing Dungeons & Dragons that tethered him to his home, even as it slipped further away.

Much of the first part of season three sees him all but begging his friends to forget their newfound hormones and girlfriends to play D&D and just be kids again – you know, like the old days before they were thrust into an inter-dimensional battle with world-ending stakes. As that chance for some familiar sense of normalcy fades away, Will is unsure where he can take shelter anymore.

That’s how it can feel coming to terms with being gay. For those who struggle with it, as so many do, any threat to the fragile existence you build for yourself to get through the day and feel OK can be overwhelming. Like watching your glass house crack all at once – or worse, in excruciating slow motion.

For three years now, Will has been a stranger in his own body, sharing it not only with a supernatural presence trying to use their bond to infiltrate our world, but also with an all-too-familiar anxiety about who he is – something we all feel, gay or not.

But what’s more unsettling is seeing how Will has found his new normal in the chaos.

As soon as he realizes the threat of the Mind Flayer has reawakened, he buries his hurt, confusion and anger in the name of saving the world. He deflects apologies from his friends because there’s work to be done.

That self-sacrifice for the greater good of those around you is something the LGBT community also has plenty of experience in. So often, we are forced – or feel obligated – to push our own self exploration deep down to make it easier for those around us, casting aside the important work we owe ourselves to find out who we are.

The third season of “Stranger Things” doesn’t spend much time with Will’s journey and that's a shame, especially considering it was through his struggle that were first introduced to this wild world. His story is even given less narrative attention than Robin's own coming out revelation late in the season.

But if you’ve personally experienced the trials of a sexual identity crisis, you recognize the subtext.

Feeling comfortable in your own skin can be a lifelong journey, one that can seem as though someone has turned your life upside down. In Hawkins, Will Byers knows that better than anyone.

#will byers #noah schnapp #byler #<target audience #st articles

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apprehensiveacorn · 11 months

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ACORN IT'S BAD

THE PROGRAMMINAGDAODIHGAOIDSHAISHGOAHODIAHDGOA SPARROWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWAIHGAOIDHGAOIHGOAIHWOIHWOIHOIHQOQHROWIEHOEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I’m gonna be honest, I’ve been doing nothing but reading demon slayer fanfiction for the last few days, and I popped in to see how Tumblr was, and I saw this ask, and I was like, “Oh, I missed an episode. Time to go watch that!”

And HOLY HELL, HALF AN HOUR???? We have been spoiled, gang. We hold hands with an equal amount of freakout on our faces. Pacing, thinking, gnawing on my nails

Before I go all theory-deary, the MUSIC BRO. OH MY. The music was so fucjing cool!!!!! Cool music, cool visuals, cool tone of voice, EVERYTHING WAS COOL!!!! And the shrieker at the end? AGEJKAKWNDKIWUSBEJWN

Watch Sparrow become Pama from Minecraft Storymode (that giant fucking robot that mind controlled people w/ those redstone button looking contraptions)

This episode was also really heckin’ interesting for other reasons, too

It seems like the Sparrow we know and love has not been as fully integrated into the mechanical thought processes of a copper golem as we thought.

So, the new copper golem body, on a very basic and obvious—though no less important—level, functions with the same goal as a human body; to keep the body alive.

Second thing I noticed, it seems as if the copper golem’s body functions operate using a proper ai system. An artificial intelligence with a purpose, but still specific wants and needs. However, while a human’s body cannot think for the human, Sparrow’s body’s ai system seems like it can.

While, for humans, if we are hungry, we—ourselves—think of ways to get food, whether that’s a trip to the grocery store or an elaborate trap to catch rabbit or dear. For Sparrow, however, when his body requires something that he does not have (ie. Copper for sustenance) it thinks and problem solves on its own, only giving the proper conscience (Sparrow) instructions on how to get what it needs. It’d be like your body telling you which screws and where for a shelf.

This explains the “part of me is so unsure, but the other part of me knows exactly what to do”

It could also explain the “Objective Updated” text. The body’s AI believes that the conscience (Sparrow) is not willing to put needs over wants, so it influences the conscience (Sparrow) to do so. ie, “dig” and “be more efficient”.

Almost like a parent directing a child. Just, way more controlling lmao

Sparrow was planning to go see people, but he was out of food, so he would have been hungry the whole time. In need of sustenance = not operating at full capability = higher chance of death or failure = worst case scenario.

Then there’s “Be More Efficient”

Not fully efficient = wasted energy. Wasted energy = more sustenance consumed to make up for it. More sustenance consumed = less in reserve = more work to get more.

Efficiency is good. It means doing the most work with the least amount of energy possible. Efficiency is optimal. That’s why Sparrow’s body wants Sparrow to act with the the utmost efficiency.

It’s a self defense mechanism employed by Sparrow’s mechanical copper golem body.

This—theoretically—could affect his sense of self, his sense of reasoning, maybe even his independence. Because why would he have to think much if his body has already done it for him? Why would he want to spend his thought energy on making new machines when his body is already working it out for him, feeding him instructions, giving him orders? Hypothetically, probably won’t happen in canon, it would be very interesting if Sparrow created a sort-of codependency on his own body. If someone wrote a fic on that I would implode

Idk if I’ve explained this well or not, but to make up for the four (💀💀) days it took to word it well-enough, take these screenshots!

#acronage #new life smp #new life sparrow #nlsmp sparrow #nl!sparrow #nlsmp #nlsmp spoilers #nlsmpblr #nlsmp owen #owengejuicetv #new life smp spoilers

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thekoopalingsandstuffs · 5 months

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(Long ass ask, for Christmas!!!)

Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays to everyone, but it is time for some gifts! :3

Everyone!!!! *gets a plate of cookies each, and Spewart gets non dairy cookies* Enjoy the cookies :3

Roy *gives him plushes of everyone in his life that he cares and loves* Merry christmas to you and hope the best for you Your a lovely person ane you deserve the world

Ludwig, I hope your day is wonderful.. I decided to jump the ball on your gift but I do hope you can enjoy it or if you don't like it, gice it to someone that probably will. *gives Ludwig the theremin*

Iggy, *gives him a moby huge (basically 5 ft dildo)* Unused but I had no use for it anymore, it was a joke gift i got but if you can use it. Have fun.

Morton, I didn't want to do the same as I did last year so I decided to try something out. *Gives him a bunch of different ingredients for baking like stuff to make like cookies, muffins, mooncakes, etc* I hope you enjoy the holidays :3

Wendy, *gives her a massive make up kit, but is has a lot of different things, eyeshadow, lipgloss, blush, etc* I know how much you love makeup and decided to spoil you as for it. Enjoy yourself.

Larry, I hope that your day is nice... *gives him more hair spray paint, Christmas colors though* Make yourself look like a pretty Christmas tree but I do hope your day is swell...

Lemmy, since you liked my last Christmas gift and also the homemade knives. I made you more! *gives Lemmy three homemade knives, they are better then the last homemade ones but still have their flaws* Sorry if they are not perfect..!

Junior. Well, I was rushing to find something for you for Christmas and unfortunately i ended up getting two things for you. *gives him a six foot tall Geronimo Stilton plush. And then a plate of homemade cookies* Been making cookies like mad. And made extra :3

Nibbles, *give her a medium rare 18 pound prime rib* Dig in sweetheart, you are a good chain chomp and you deserve the world.

Spewart, I am truely unsure to as of what to get you but I did have a idea.. *gives Spewart a box of yarn and some knitting kits* I do hope they come to use one day or make yourself something that makes you happy.

Rango, *gives Rango some packets of different flavors of weed* I thought you would want some. Maybe you can put them in some brownies or smoke them. Either way, enjoy yourself

Hariet, *gives her a pretty light purple veil for like either for wedding or for like Halloween stuff* I was unsure on what to get you but I do hope you enjoy it..

Topper, *gives him some rock music albums and some are limited edition covers and a small bluetooth speaker* I do hope you enjoy these, you are a good brother and I hope the best for you for the following years. :3

Pealsey, I am unsure on what to give you. But I do hope this is alright. *gives Pealsey a pure gold sword cover* More for it you are doing something and don't want your sword to be ruined type things. I hope Christmas is wonderful for you...!

Nabbit, I hope you enjoy this dress... *gives Nabbit a wedding dress, semi looks like the one that she stole but its in a light purple color instead* I had tried to find exact but I could not unfortunately. I hope you like it..!

Motley, I know you do not celebrate but I don't want you to feel left out as of gifts. *Gives her a Lemmy themed colored hat* I know how much you love Lemmy and Hats, so I got you a gift that fit both. I hope you enjoy your day!

Popple, do not tell anyone but have this... *gives him a tracking device for scanning houses to find out if the house is worth robbing or not* I do hope it comes to use and you can use it. Have a good holiday Popple.

Persephone, I know you may be a queen and such or don't expect gifts but I do hope you enjoy this. *gives her a some earrings that are little crown with the colors of orange, green and dark purple-pink* Enjoy your Christmas...

MERRY CHRISTMAS

-D

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daisyandbilly · 1 year

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Let’s talk about episodes 4, 5, and 6 of Daisy Jones & the Six! This is kind of late because I have written and re-written this review 8 times.

(Spoilers galore — do not continue reading if you don’t want to be spoiled)

Let’s start with the good! Immersion. Episode 4’s house party was what I’ve been waiting for in terms of set and scenery. The smoky rooms, the people, the noise, the outfits, the wood paneling of the house. I think the house party will forever be a favorite part of this series for me. It was a happy addition. Although it didn’t exist in the book, Camila bringing Daisy into the fold and getting Billy to put aside his ego for the sake of his art and the band was great. She saw the potential of them and orchestrated a thing of beauty. Lots of mess but also beauty! Seeing the band interact outside of a strict music setting was a joy. Can we get more of that?! Daisy holding Julia: chills. Another full circle moment, they’ve always been somewhat connected.

I still don’t like that Daisy didn’t actually have a career until she met the Six but their first performance was great. Billy’s annoyance, Daisy’s false bravado, her crashing the stage after the first song, The Six’s excitement. All so good. Camila clocking Billy for his rudeness during the interview. So good!

I have zero notes for Simone thus far, she has been a delight to watch and I can’t wait to experience her New York disco days.

I loved everything about Karen and Graham’s little surfing side quest, down to the car his… girlfriend(?) was driving — i want it! When she pulled him inside of the house my eyes popped out of my head lmao. Karen jokingly using her jealousy to shame the poor girl for her love of Barry Manilow threw me off a liiiitle. It wasn’t a huge issue at all, it’s just that in my head she would’ve been too cool to say that, girls girl and #girlboss and all.

These episodes were some of my favorite so far. The tension and initial anger and the music were great. I love understanding the context of songs and this was so special. More Fun to Miss and Regret Me truly hit even deeper if that was possible. Watching Billy and Daisy go back and forth when writing the album felt very frustratingly satisfying. It’s such an important chunk of the book and I wouldn’t have minded it playing out a bit longer but I’m unsure if that’s because I still feel thrown off by the pacing of the show. We only have four episodes left.

Now let’s get to the elephant in the post. Unfortunately I have been spoiled left and right while running this blog. I knew about the kiss (and a few other changes that I won’t spoil, don’t worry.) And as much of a fangirl moment that I had during it (I still gasped and leapt from my chair), when it was over… I was left scratching my head. The excruciating what-if aspect that looms over the book has been replaced with a handful of cliches. There is no guessing or later revelation, it’s all been laid out.

I hate that I agree with the critics again, I swear I never thought that would happen, but once Billy initiates the kiss a lot of the plot has been stripped of its nuance. This is now a show about a very real love triangle. I know things must change for adaptations and they really wanted to lean into the Fleetwood Mac aspect of the band’s relationships but something about the dynamic between these characters is off especially this version of Camila and Billy as we continue with the season. We’re supposed to feel love and instead it’s translating as obligation.

Book Billy’s faithfulness to Camila after he got sober is what he held onto with a vice grip. And although he loved her and emphasized that he chose her above all else, the weight of temptation everyday constantly crushed and guided most of his decisions when he was with Daisy. They were magic onstage because it was where they could be together and burn all that pent up energy. Daisy replaced his addiction and because of that she was the temptation he never fully lost himself in because of what happened the first time. Watching them together on stage was meant to be akin to the dynamic of The Civil Wars. Profound longing mixed with unbridled inhibition and the sadness of the reality of their situation.

Here he’s already given into the temptation that he was supposed to ultimately struggle with when he made a decision at that bar in Chicago. And once Daisy vocalizes her anger/hurt at him bringing Camila to the Aurora cover shoot, the triangle has been solidified. This feels like an affair, just one that didn’t have enough gas to take off. I understand the idea of and see the tweets about conflicting point of views and unreliable accounts (due to who is interviewing them) and while I agree (I do!), that just doesn’t hold up here. Daisy’s shame that Billy rejects her after she kisses him is meant to get her on the path to running away to Thailand, marrying Niccolò and falling deeper into addiction. The idea of her leaving because of the same Rolling Stone article that she exposed Billy for is ??????? And seeing Camila here being relegated to a wife standing by her man cheating a second time as long as he doesn’t love Daisy is so… weird. Not even a little fling with Eddie could even the score but honestly good for her! (this is meant to replace that “lunch” with Greg/Gary Egan that happens in the book). I hope they don’t turn Camila into a placeholder; just another obstacle for Daisy and Billy to endure especially now that they’ve chosen to shorten the age gap between the interviews because that would be depressing.

Do I still love these characters? Absolutely. The show is doing a wonderful job of capturing a lot of emotions and I can not emphasize enough how much I love this cast. I know these are deeply flawed characters and they eventually experience the consequences of their actions and selfishness but we’re still supposed to be rooting for them. I do think they’ve forgotten to slip a few redeeming qualities for Billy in tho 👀.

Rating ⭐️ — 4 out of 5

24 hours later and Im still going back and forth with this rating lol

Also why Greece? Nothing wrong with that change, just curious

#love you sam riley camila everyone! but the writers deserve a little jail time #daisy jones and the six #djats #taylor jenkins reid #djats spoilers

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spyrkle4 · 2 years

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An update for Heroes of Flowers since the Tempest of Hearts almost is over

it’ll be awhile... not like 2 months long but like a couple weeks hopefully until the next HOF update (im thinking maybe September?)

And thought I’d share some of what’s coming up and what’ll happen!

If you’d like to prefer being kept in the dark I’ll put it under a “read more” n.n

So Phase 3 (Which will be after the interlude story) will be the end of what I’d call the “main” story of HOF and it takes place during the fugitive arc in the show timeline... tho im not doing the fugitive arc plotline bc Snooze would get conked on the head with a broom by an angry Ari everytime he went into the Lucky Cat and also I’d like to keep my braincells

(Tho Chief Cruz will be a part of Phase 3 even if he isn’t the “big bad”... but like in the “ok grandpa let’s get you back to bed” energy everytime he rants about superheroes and supervillains XD. Not rly but I think you’ll like how I write him)

Phase 3 instead covers an arc I’ve dropped hints of... which I like to call the Galaxian arc since the big bads of that are the Galaxian Pirates, my own little supervillain team. Not stating that my og arc is gonna be better than canon (even if the bar is low) but I hope you guys enjoy (I shall be posting their refs as they show up tho so you’ll like em).

Like I said, not saying im better than canon (which is a loaded subject tbh im not going into that), but I had a fun writing my own little twists to the latter half of Season 2 and I hope you enjoy them!

But there’s an interlude fic before that which’ll be called Heroes of Flowers: Curtain Call and it follows the aftermath of COM and be mostly focused with the Fern fam, with the nerd gang (+ Ari) getting a break in the bg. It’s basically the calm before the storm

It’ll also be the canonical debut of Jackie the emotional support Rabbit, an OC I’ve drawn before but he hasn’t shown up in HOF yet. (A bit of trivia about him tho is he’s based off of a Pokemon character of mine, Jackie the Buneary from one of my stories LPM), this drawing is from the cover of Curtain Call and this is all you’re getting of it for now

(Jackie isnt one of the main characters of HOF but he is one of my favorite side characters to write, his debut sidenote is kind of later in the story, but I hope you’ll enjoy CC! It was fun giving the Ferns the spotlight, something that miiight’ve carried over in FFP because I had way too much fun writing my emotional support found family)

Phase 3′ll be called Fallen From Power and it’ll be posted after Curtain Call but wait there’s more!

I’ll also be posting a side-story called Heroes of Flowers: Karmi’s Spots which will have Karmi having her own adventures outside of SF featuring a lovable spotted family in Camden and two OCs that may or may not be related to some canons.

KS was really self-indulgent/fun, I enjoyed writing all the shenanigans and it’s also a crossover with an underrated TV show I really like. Tho dw I tried my best to be noob friendly (if you haven’t seen the show), but I can always go into details in the ANs, still hope you enjoy it!

there will be some references to Fallen From Power in it, I’ll be sure to mention which chapter the reference is at the start of each chapter if there is a reference so you don’t get spoiled if you haven’t seen said chapter... tho ur free to take the spoilers out of context I’m not one to tell people how to read n.n;

unsure how i’ll update but im thinking of doing an every-other week thing, one week I’ll post for FFP and one week I’ll post for KS!

Anyways hope you guys enjoyed and I hope you’re hyped to see what I have in store. I had a lot of fun writing these 3 future installments and I’m excited to share them with you guys!

I just had to talk about the future of HOF since after TOH (and I mean Tempest of Hearts, not The Owl House, so many people get them mixed up its so funny XD), hope you guys have a good one!

#heroes of flowers #bh6 fanfiction #fanfics

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lotho · 2 years

Text

Opinions For Pasion De Gavilanes 02

NO BUT I WILL FUCKING RANT ABOUT S2 ANOTHER DAY AND WHY I DROPPED IT BUT HERE I AM GIVING OFF MY OPINIONS FOR THIS LOVELY LOVELY NOVELA

Also spoilers

Oscar is not a fucking cheater.

I have herd complains on how he is a dick and such in the beginning, but for me he was a funny dick. He also gets really good development as the series goes on, he also loves Jimena like a fuck ton.

Even if he is greedy and money hungry he still clearly cares for the people in his life and is actually really grateful, like when he gave money too Leandro for his business and supported him.

THEN WHY DID THEY MAKE HIM CHEAT?!?!?!?!??! HE WOULD NEVER CHEAT, DID YOU NOT SEE THAT BOY WHEN HE WAS AWAY FROM JIMENA????? HE LOVES HER SO MUCH MORE THAN A ONE-NIGHT STAND. ALL THE REYEYS LOVE THEIR WIVES TO THE POINT THEY WOULD NEVER CHEAT ON THEM OR EVEN STARE AT ANOTHER WOMEN!!!!! THEIR LEGIT SO FUCKING LOYAL, UGH THIS PISSES ME OFF SO MUCH. DID THEY NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH HIS AND JIMENA’S CHARACTER??????

2. The Twins are pretty funny (02)

No reason I just think the twins are pretty funny. They're assholes and perhaps murders but I find them pretty entertaining. There spoiled kids for sure and sorta freaky/weird for having a threesome with the same girl. But I find they really funny and actually way better than Juan David’s character! Who in bye next one-

3. Juan David Is a pretty boring/bad character

Maybe I just simply do not like that he is just a cheap version of Juan Reyes, or maybe because HE IS FUCKING A MOM AND HER DAUGHTER. He is suppose to be the leader of the family, the oldest of the second generation of the Reyes, his role is sorta suppose to be mentoring his siblings and younger cousins while also growing alongside them. But he as much depth to him a slice cheese sandwich. They could have put him as being stressed for being the oldest, having to be like his father and be mature and shit. Oldest child syndrome or something idk I just really don’t fucking like his character I think its a waste.

4. Franco’s Absence(?)

Okay he is kidnapped or something, idk I didn’t go that far cause I felt like episodes started to get worst as it went on and that the actor was busy with his own shit but what I didn’t like was how the characters reacted to it. I feel like it is a trend were they see the worst in Franco due to misunderstandings but this one pisses me off.

The brother Reyes just accepted that he left the family???? In the beginning of the series ever since Libra died both Oscar and Juan are quite a bit protective of Franco, hell their really protective towards each other! The Reyes I know would not accept one of them being missing after all the shit they went through and having the many enemies they do. They also know he really loves Sarita, and probably his kids. But then they really accept his absence?!?!

Also when did he leave? His kids seem to know nothing about them.

Though the clips of him coming back and him and Sarita is really comforting and cute, got I hate how they treated this adorable couple.

5. Gabriela Is Done Dirty.

Like wtf, why is she still the worst? Where did the character development go!?!?!??!??!?! I hate that they made her into a villain again.

Tho I do like and hate how they still kept her as the same villain, how they kept she was sorta sexism towards her daughters in the beginning kept happening with Gaby. Her traditionalist ideals harming the people she suppose loves, but idk.

6. Andres’s Treatment as LGBTQ+ Character With His Love Interest

I just herd of the spoilers so take this from a grain of salt, so I am unsure if this is totally accurate or not.

So apparently Andres got with an older man and that is just a really fucking stupid trope in novelas I really hate. To make things interesting the young gay character has to be with an older man character? I hate that LGBTQ characters need some sorta of taboo instead of having a normal romance like the straight parings.

I do actually really like Andres tho, he is likable character and is like a passive but more confident Franco.

Leandro was one of my favorite characters in the original and though that even if his is the stereotype gay man, he was a great character all the round and was super funny. I think he is pretty decent rep for the time.

So I am sorta disappointed with the rep with Andres with his love interest, overall though he is alright. (Also for anyone still watching is Juan still homophobic? Like in the original he is canonically homophobic and Franco is more or less not with the Oscar scene but idk.

Also random but I love the scene so much It makes me laugh a lot.)

7. Family means nothing in 02.

The whole thing with the first season was about family, how your suppose to be together no matter what and support even with each other downfalls. The brother even after everything loved each other and care so much, the same goes with the sisters.

The second gen of Reyes fucking do not like each other. I saw the pictures of Gaby and Andres saying they don’t care for the twins, the twins fighting the older brother constantly, Juan David sorta looking like he thinks with more with his dick, so on so forth. The fights between the brother and sisters still had some sort of love towards them and they still protect each other. I feel no familiar connection towards these fuckers and I hate it. If these guys went poor like Juan, Oscar, Franco or deal with a force like Fernando like how the sisters did, I think they would have actually killed each other among themselves.

8. Villains suck.

I cannot actually name any of them currently but they are so not iconic like in the first season.

That is just a simple fact, enough said.

9. No good Ships

I hate the Juan David with Rosario I hate Juan David with Muriel (she could so MUCH better)

I hate Andres with the older dude.

Gaby with her boyfriend is eh, the dude is just not interesting.

Norma and Juan are still bland as ever.

Oscar would NEVER CHEAT ON JIMENA.

THEY DEPRIVED US OF SARAIT AND FRANCO AND I CANNOT FORGIVE THEM FOR THAT

The friendship with Andres and Muriel is pretty good I guess.

(Glad they stopped the Juan David love triangle with Andres tho)

10. The Plot Is just overall a mess and Where are the other characters?

The plot lines in the original were connected, in this one it is just all over the place.

WHO CHEATED ON WHO? WHO GOT KIDNAPPED? WHO IS THIS CREEP?

And I know that some actors couldn't come on the show again but fuck man, I miss Eva. I also thought their uncle would stay in contact at least? What about Ruth and Benito? The two brothers and their family who own the grocery store?What about my queen pepita? I know they brought back Panchita with a different actress but they just completely butchered her character, what ever happened to her being the voice of reason?

Rip Sebastian Boscán, his life was taken away too soon.

#pasion de gavilanes 2 #pasion de gavilanes

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seospicybin · 2 years

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omg the last innings !!

With a heavy heart, I have to tell you that this will be the last and the saddest chapter 🥲

I had to stop writing it at some point because I got carried away.

Here's a little snippet for my Innings enthusiasts:

(Warning: Not proofread.)

"Come, lay down with me," you said to him as you lay on the bed.

He glared at you, "it's a bad habit to nap after lunch," he said.

"I'm not saying we're going to nap, we're just laying down," you whined, "and also, I've been in heels for hours," your eyes shot to your swollen feet.

He walked up to the end of the bed and kindly took the high heels off of you, gave you foot rubs.

You giggled because it tickled you, "come here, please!" You patted the pillow next to you, puffing it for him.

He caved in and took his shoes off before climbing the bed, lying next to you.

You delightfully hummed the moment you rested your head on his chest and your hand on his stomach, "this is nice,"

Seungmin put an arm around you, holding you close on the bed and you were right, this was nice, just laying close next to each other like this.

"Can we go over our plans again," you told him.

He softly laughed then glanced down at you, looking at you resting with your eyes closed on his chest.

"I'll be going and play some more baseball while you apply for your dream job, and get accepted and we'll be living our best selves," Seungmin paused to look at you, unsure if he should continue.

You looked up at him, "go on," you encouraged.

"And we'll meet every weekend and perhaps go on vacations to somewhere exotic once or twice a year. I'll be winning mvp and you'll be winning some pullitzer awards and we'll continue living our best selves," he finished.

You let out a dreamy sighed, "I always like it when you laud out our plans like that, it would be better if I can make that happen,"

He squeezed your waist, strongly denied your remark, "don't say that!"

"You'll do great!" He convinced you then pressed a kiss on your forehead.

But his kisses weren't enough to put you on ease, you nestled your head deeper into his neck and put your hand around him, "Things are changing and it scares me," you sadly muttered with your mouth so close to his ear.

He held you tighter, wrapping you with his arms and gripped your arm to let you know you weren't alone.

"Change is not always a bad thing," he caressed your head affectionately.

You turned your head at him and he was looking at you with tenderness in his eyes, you wanted to believe his words so much but the anxiety was still there.

You leaned in and kissed him to make it go away.

Your hand made its way down to his tie and carefully loosened it around his collar.

Seungmin stopped you, "I still have practice to do today," he said to you.

You scoffed, "I'm not trying to do anything. I'm just helping you loosening your tie cause it looks stuffy,"

"What did you think I'm trying to do here?" You raised an eyebrow at him.

"Nothing," he replied with an awkward laugh.

You laughed at him and nuzzled your head back in his neck, closed your eyes, enjoying his warm embrace. You listened to his steady breathing and syncing it with yours, your fingers found their way to clasp with his on his chest.

Seungmin understood your anxiety really well and he knew that him leaving for another city didn't help, you needed him as much as he needed you.

He felt like he was partly responsible for the reason why it scares you so much.

"Even if things don't work out, you still have me," he said to you, along with a caress on your cheek.

But he didn't hear any reply from you, he tilted your head up just enough to see that you were sleeping.

He held you close instead and softly kissed your cheek, "you can always come to me. I'll protect you," he said to you then placed a chaste kiss on your lips despite you couldn't return it in your sleep.

Oops I spoil too much 🥲

#spicy mail #last inning

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apollogivesmevisions · 4 months

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theres this game i played recently -- didnt finish it yet -- called 'Umurangi Generation'. Not to spoil anything but it had a very strong message for me, simply put. amongst other things, it had this weird feeling that I couldn't quite name when I first played it. Recently though, with... many things happening in the world and a few in my personal life as well, I think I got ahold of it a bit better

It feels like there's no real reason to keep going. Why study, or grow, or work for a better life, if I'll end up under tyrannical capitalism, in a corrupt world that's slowly drowning, with death threats for me specifically, as a {insert minority}?

Umurangi Generation isn't depressive, and it has its own message and things to say, so I won't talk in its place because I probably wouldn't be able to put it into words without misunderstanding it. If you have a few hours of free time though, it's free on itch.io i think. It's maori too, and is just. beautiful. you can take pictures of your friends in it

For a while I was in that weird, drowning like feeling, where you feel the air leaving your body, but feel so alien to yourself that there's no more drive to even struggle in the waters. metaphorically

last week though, a friend that I rarely talk to invited me to this music hall thing--never had seen one before, had no idea what to expect. what i discovered was an incredibly powerful, funny, and full of life group of queer artists. i felt a bit ashamed to have even been so depressive, and even worse, pessimistic about myself and the world

there was this actor, who did a monologue. He had a shirt with "PD" written on it (that means something like faggot, in french). he said it was the first time he was turning 31. well, he thought at least. because surely, he must've been 31 before, and even more, but there had been so much people to erase anything that would've kept track of how old he was, it felt like he only started all over again. and he said yeah, it was normal there was more of him, of us, now, because we kept living, and we were going to keep living.

(to be clear--thats a queer metaphor for the numerous times in history where we've been killed, erased, etc)

it kind of stuck with me. my friend told me i was crying when he said those things. i don't remember doing so

Recently it's felt like I can't even sleep enough to rest my eyes and cry

But his words stuck with me, because, yeah. I'm still here, and we're still here, and there's so much that's been lost, but we know what we saved. It's all been burned before and we're still here.

And I don't know. i don't know where I'll be in five years or more, i know I'll still have suicidal thoughts, at least for a while, and I don't know what'll happen with the world, the people that are drowning and those that are being murdered, and the rest of the world that seems so uncaring.

But like, I know there's still people now. There's still people to tell the stories of so many that are dead, and there's still openly queer folk dancing and giving joy to other people in music halls, and there's still things to fight for, and be proud of. because it's not done, it's not finished, and there's still so much to fight for

I don't know

There was also this artist (named THÉA on music platforms, she's great) who sang some stuff which really moved me. one of her songs is named "Ennui" (Boredom) and it says "We don't have any goal, or real place, no big war, or great depression. Our big war is spiritual. Our great depression, it's our lives."

(im pretty sure thats a quote from somewhere else. unsure though)

And yeah, it feels like there's nothing more to believe in. And THÉA isn't a depressive artist to listen to, listen to the lyrics in "Juste Amis" (Just friends)

But there's this weird dread i see in people, i guess born after 2000, and in myself, that engulfs you whole and yet feels so alien. Umurangi Generation talked about it. in its end game credits is written "Dedicated to Umurangi Generation. The last generation that has to see the world die."

Often now, it feels like that. Born too late, in a dying world that can't stop nervously convulsing like a dead fish.

I don't know. If there was nothing else, I wouldn't be here. I know there's still love in this world, and it'll still keep going when I'm gone, and the clouds can make me cry because of how the sun bounces off of them, and I have friends that are lovely, and there's passionate and powerful people who are alive, now, and are doing something, and i collect poetry about lesbians and about the beauty of gendered languages and about queer people in my phone

and yet, I can't finish this on a happy or hopeful note. I don't know how to. I wish I could, but when I try to summon my passion, it's full of rage rather than love. But I want to love this world. I want to believe I can have a life in it. I want to believe I can make a change and help people

i don't know

#suicide mention #suicide tw #slur #uhhhh a lot of stuff #death mention #depression tw #rant #personal rant #veesprophecies #something like poetry?#could name this uhhh... 'how to grief a world that isn't dead yet'#re: that post about making stable communities to fight an increasing loneliness in an uncaring world as a form of rebellion by the youth #free to rb unless this starts becoming popular

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they2aproblem · 10 months

Text

Post #001: Final Fantasy XVI

The first thing I want to say this is my first attempt at writing a “review” so if it’s terrible, please be gentile. I am happy that this first “review” will be on Final Fantasy XVI because it’s a game that I found myself enjoying. I have completed all the side quests, and I completed the main story. I plan on picking it up again at a later date to go for a 100% run.

The game itself is a mixed bag, there are parts of the story that have flashes of brilliance but then there are parts where the pacing just slows down to a crawl. There are several instances where the characters are explaining the situation rather than having the characters react to what is happening to them. Despite that, the English voice actors are talented enough to be able to convey the needed emotion when appropriate. There are points where the story gets serious but then there are moments of levity that pulls back on the seriousness. The story never gets to the point where it feels like it’s completely hopeless, and it also it never gets to the point where there are no consequences for your actions. It always feels like you, as the player, can fix whatever problems Clive is facing at the time, whether they be problems caused by an external force or be they self-inflicted problems. While I enjoyed the story in its almost entirety, about 3/4ths of the way through the game the story hits a temporary rough spot. Unfortunately, like past Final Fantasy games, the main quest is centered around the concept of crystals.

The battle system is the most fun I’ve had with a battle system in a Final Fantasy game. I’ve seen complaints that the Final Fantasy XVI battle system is similar to the battle system of Devil May Cry. I have never played a Devil May Cry game, so that comparison is lost on me. The battle system is so involved that you can chain elemental attacks together. I will never be able to master the battle system to the point where I’m pulling of a 500-hit combo. I feel that Square anticipated that there would be some gamers out there that couldn’t put in the time to master the battle system and altered the battle system to be more forgiving in some aspects. Unfortunately, the bosses and some enemies have so much health that at points it feels like you’re not doing any damage at all. As with all Final Fantasy games, XVI has summons, where it differs is how they are used. Explaining how summons used in game would spoil important parts of the story.

The graphics of this game take full advantage of the PS5 capabilities. The magic attacks look amazing, and they look like they cause some major damage if it weren’t for the fact that bosses and certain enemies were damage sponges. Without spoiling too much of the story, the graphics look best during certain battles.

I see a lot of criticism of this game. I’ve seen the sales figures for this game drop from week to week. It is getting out there that this game is not meeting expectations. I hope that I did not follow the crowd and mimic the negative reviews from YouTubers like I have done with past Final Fantasys. Final Fantasy XVI is a decent game and I urge everyone who was on the fence before and eventually decided against buying it to give this game a chance. Play the demo first if you are still unsure. It is not the best Square has to offer, but it is still a game that provides an enjoyable experience.

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trumanlilac · 2 years

Text

/ / 1 0 - r o b b e r s / /

The sun crept through the blinds, shining against Matty's closed eyes and causing him to wake. He kept them tightly shut for a moment, just to keep them from burning when they'd finally open. Ellie was beside him in his arms, still asleep. She had a pretty kind of dirty face, God only knew, but he'd never leave her...even if he tried to from her pushing him away she always begged him to stay internally and he knew it. Surprisingly he had almost forgotten entirely that she'd spent the night, and that they'd slept together as well.

He hadn't slept so well in months, and probably wouldn't have at all if he hadn't been so spoiled by Ellie in bed. He felt bad that it was simply a time of need between them both to make it happen, rather than some sort of special significance...but if he thought about it for a while longer, there was a special significance. That they cared about one another, that they knew one another for so much time.

He slowly moved his arm from under her, hoping not to wake her. She turned over on her side, continuing her sleep. He got out of bed and went to the drawer, searching around for two beanie caps.

Ellie turned around to see him, covering her mouth as she yawned, "hey, what time is it?" She asked.

Matty turned around, pulling out a beanie and tossing it onto the bed, still searching for the second.

"It's seven o'clock or something like that." He said.

She hugged the blanket close, remembering she wasn't wearing a top, "I need to call my parents." She looked around for her blouse and pulled it over her head, getting dressed.

Matty pulled out a black bandana as the search for another beanie became unpromising, sitting back down on the bed, "can you hand me those scissors." He pointed to the table beside her, completely engaged in his task in which Ellie was unsure of.

She reached over and grabbed them, handing them to him and watching, "what are you doing?"

"Making you a balaclava." He said, carefully and skillfully cutting a circle through the center of one of the beanies.

"What?" She asked, crawling over to his side of the bed and resting on her knees as she watched.

"For today...I know the exact shop it would be easiest to rob. We can talk about it over breakfast, I have a couple bucks. I can use it all on breakfast because we'll be getting more when we're done anyway." He smiled as he said so.

"Matty...I thought we were just...kidding." She said slowly.

He looked up at her, "kidding? You can't be serious..."

She nodded, "you can't be serious, Matty, we can't rob a shop...that's just stupid."

He sighed, putting the scissors and the beanie down, "Ellie, would I have went on like that last night if I were kidding? Would I have even said that at all if I was kidding?"

"Well...it's--"

"The only thing you can do to make your situations better. Ellie, you need this. Together we can make it happen. We can help Alex out, help your parents out--"

"What's in it for you?" She asked, concerned in his adamant views in which he forced upon her, no one could be so pushy unless there was something in it for them too.

"Helping Alex, you, and money of course. What else?" He got up and grabbed a cigarette from the drawer top, lighting it up. The smoke hazed around him and made its way to Ellie.

She sighed nervously, grabbing the beanie and looking at it. Matty watched her, waiting for her to realize they needed this.

"What shop?"

"The liquor store your brother and I go to."

----------------------------------------------------------

Ellie looked down at her pancakes, not hungry even the slightest. She'd normally be starved at this time of the morning but she just didn't have it in her to eat. She watched Matty who looked exactly the same, yet forced himself. He was cute the way he ate and looked around the room, his hair uncombed and his shirt unbuttoned slightly.

She'd almost began to look just as messy as him, with her hair all over the place and dressed in his clothes...they both wore all black, and his pistol sat in her purse. She too, looked around the room nervously. It was almost as if everyone knew...everyone knew what they were up to and what they had on them...from the gun, to the cocaine they'd stored for later.

She'd always vowed to never do anything too hardcore involving drugs, but it was as if they were the only thing bringing her joy, next to Matty. Ellie didn't know where her life was heading but she had never felt so infinite and alive.

"I'll be back," she looked at him, running her finger against her nose to show him what she meant.

He nodded as she took her bag and headed into the bathroom. She pushed the door open and looked around, roaming through her purse, taking out the coke and quickly lining it up against the mirror shelf. Her heart raced in her chest almost burning as she tried to hurry before anyone could come in. She threw her purse on the floor as she could hear footsteps, snorting the substance and feeling the rush. She rubbed her nose as it stung, holding it and hoping not to bleed as she knew could happen.

She looked at herself in the mirror quickly for reassurance, then finished the line. The door swung open just as she finished, a young woman and her kid walking through. She smiled awkwardly, and attempted to fix her hair. She saw them go into the stall from the mirror, she then grabbed a napkin from the dispenser and took out her lipstick, writing on it, chuckling to herself in the thought of Matty's look for the day.

If she didn't say anything else before they'd possibly get caught or not, it was this. She grabbed her purse from the floor and headed back out into the diner. Matty sipped his orange juice, turning around to see her. She sat down, his shirt hanging off her shoulders. Struggling to keep it up she slid him the napkin and laughed slightly.

He opened it and read, You look so cool, xoxo.

"You too." He laughed also, forcing down a bit of pancakes.

She pushed her plate aside, speaking quietly. "So, the guys are driving, we're going in..."

Matty nodded, finishing, "you have your backpack, fill it up with the cash..."

"And then you have the gun, and tell them to put it in."

He continued to nod, taking a napkin and wiping his mouth, "and then as soon as we come outside, they'll be coming and we'll be going."

Ellie smirked, the affects of the coke took away her nervousness and she was now pumped for anything.

"Ready?" He asked.

She nodded and took one last sip of her orange juice, Matty took out his wallet and looked at the bill, pulling out the exact amount.

------------------------------------------------------------

Matty looked at Ellie as they grew nearer to the shop, she too looked at him, realizing that they'd either win or lose together. He reached out and grabbed her hand, lacing his fingers with her's. It reassured her that everything was going to be okay and even if it wasn't it still would be because she wasn't alone. His palms were sweaty and so were hers, clearly out of nervousness.

They looked down the streets they'd cross, making sure it was clear, seeing George, Ross and Adam parked in Matty's van where they'd told them to. Matty nodded to them, signalling that it was time. George sat up, getting ready.

Matty looked at her one more time before she put on his homemade balaclava. He remembered when he found her, she was much younger than she was now. She'd gone from being just his mates little sister that he'd watch grow up, to now his partner in crime...and she was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. She looked up at him through her big green eyes, he pulled the bandanna around his neck up over his nose, she kissed him as it would probably be the last time...feeling his lips through the fabric. At last she pulled her balaclava over her face.

She handed him his gun, and together they ran into the shop.

#sex chocolate rock n roll #trumanlilac #the 1975 #matty healy #george daniel #ross macdonald #adam hann #fanfiction #fan fiction #fanfic #fan fic #matty healy fanfiction #the 1975 fanfiction #writeblr #writers on tumblr #writer on tumblr

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jameui · 3 years

Text

MOVIE DATE

PAIRING: Hwang Hyunjin x Manager!M!Reader

GENRE: Angst, Fluff

WARNING: Hyunjin being a jerk

SUMMARY: You boyfriend, Hyunjin took you out on a date to watch your favorite movie.

You sighed in exhaustion and as if the world was trying to test you, a fast running bicycle came your way causing you to jump to the side, so fast that you forgot about the takeouts you had in your hands and at a blink of an eye the neatly boxed items fell to the ground, all the food now spilled on the floor with your eyes widening in fear. "Shit!" You yelled out and tried to get back to the restaurant again, but as soon as you got there the line was already long and it'd take you ages to get to the counter to order, again.

You were at your way to your work with your phone squeezed in between your shoulder and ear as you talked to your co-manager on the other line who seemed agitated for your tardiness, while you tried to balance the foods you were made to order. "Yes, sir. I'll make sure that won't happen again." You told the male before the call was cut short when he decided to hang up all of a sudden.

Looking around, you saw a chinese restaurant that had the smallest line, so you went there and bought the food there, even though the orders of the group was not exactly what they wanted for you to buy. You just couldn't go back empty handed.

After a few minutes of walking, you finally arrived at the venue of the fansign event and got there just in time before Stray Kids were called to the stage for their activity to be done, but the moment you got there you saw that the people present were already eating their food away. They noticed your presence entering the room whilst their head turned to look at you. "I... Good morning, everyone." You greeted them. 'Guess their manager got their food delivered.'

You didn't get a reply, except from the group who was more than happy to see that you had food on your hands. "Hyung! Thank God. I was starving." The group's youngest, Jeongin said as he helped you put the foods down on the table. "You're seriously a life saver."

You smiled at him giving him a muttered thanks that earned you a smile from Jeongin. Honestly speaking, Jeongin was the second best person you ever liked in the group, the first being Lee Felix since he was the only person to ever approach you on your first day since he was able to see how much you were so nervous. Felix was also one of the members who taught you korean, the other being Bang Chan. You had always knew the group back then, and now and you were damn thankful that you got the opportunity to be in their circle.

Knowing how young you were to be working for them, they treated you nicely, not because they needed to, rather cause it was in their nature to be caring. Well, at least except one person. You were the closest to Felix who treated you like his personal manager and a friend as well, going out on friendly dates with you to the park, dog cafés, just anywhere Felix would find interesting to visit.

Who's the person that seemed irritated whenever you were around you ask? Why, the one and only visual king, Hwang Hyunjin. He doesn't actually treat you bad, but the way his eyes would always turn dark or displeased when you show up in his line of sight made you feel so small and felt totally unwelcomed. That was then, apparently, since today the male looked a little too quiet and didn't even bother to look at you. Believe me or not that's actually the kindest thing he's done to you.

You would try to go to him to try and talk to him, worried by his silence. You just furrowed your brows and sighed completely aware that no matter how much you try to talk to him he won't even dare to acknowledge you being there for him.

"M/n, are you just gonna stand there? Come and eat." Chan told you, but you just politely declined his offer with the shake of your head before telling him that you had just taken your breakfast and that you were full, more and you feel like your stomach's gonna burst. "Hm, suit yourself, but I'll be leaving mine untouched, so you can eat it when you get hungry, yeah?"

"You're so kind, Chan." You gave him a smile that got Chan smiling also showing his deep dimples that you could just dive in it anytime soon.

"Hey, hey, hey! We've known each other the longest. Why do I still have to call you 'hyung' and M/n doesn't?" Jisung, one of the group's rapper, pouted with folded arms as Chan chuckled before ruffling the kid's hair that Jisung angrily shook off.

"Well, since he's not that spoiled, unlike you." Chan answered Jisung who gasped dramatically. "And he also gained my permission, so—"

"Whenever or not he's around, is he the only person that ever comes into your mind?" That all too familiar voice spoke out, all your heads turning towards the person. He scoffed and stood up with a smirk on his face, probably in disbelief that the whole group was talking to you and always thought about you. "I mean, come on. There's gotta be something else to talk about other than this... person." You felt his eyes look at you while your eyes stared at him with rising anger. "There's sports, other artists, songs, music, so many and you chose to pick him as the topic of your talk."

"Hyunjin, that is very disrespectful." Chan gritted out, but Hyunjin knew better than to listen or to even stop.

"I'm really not, hyung." Hyunjin's smirk grew wider eyeing you with a suspicious look on his eyes. An idea popped in his head as he opened his mouth to talk. "But, if you want to, I could show you how disrespectful I can get." Without any warning, he took the take-out container and bottled drink in his hand and gave you no second to react as he poured all of its contents onto your head with a loud gasp coming out of you. "There. I'll call it a masterpiece even."

"Hwang Hyunjin!" Bang Chan's voice boomed through the whole room a still smirking Hyunjin turning around to face the older male who was fuming with anger. "You—"

"Chan!" You called out to him before things got a little out of hand. For pete's sake their going to just fight because Hyunjin had made a mess of you? You were not even worth the fight. "No. I'm fine. I can just quickly change, that's all. I'll be right back and I better get no reports about you two fighting." You told the two, Chan rolling his eyes.

You got out of the room and ran as fast as you can to the nearest restroom, cleaning yourself as soon as you arrived. Times like this you would immediately bawl your eyes out, but with the constant behavior that Hyunjin showed to you, you grew used to it. Heck, you even sometimes feel that the other boys only act like they liked you being there and when you weren't, they'd stab you behind your back. "Goodness, why won't this get off."

"Need help?" A raspy voice came from the entrance of the restroom, turning your head around to see Felix leaning himself on the door frame with his arms crossed, then untangled them to let his hands rest inside his pockets and stepped inside as you smiled at him. "Do you need more tissue?"

You shook your head at him, your attention back on your stained favorite shirt wiping them clean with the tissues the place's restroom owned. "Nah, there's plenty here. Besides, I'm all dried up now." You said and showed yourself to him, Felix knitting his brows in worry.

He seeped air through his teeth and cocked his head to the side, unsure if you should be wearing that now dirty shirt when you'd be with them during the activity the whole time. "I don't think you should be wearing that."

"Why? It's my favorite sweater." You chuckled half-heartedly.

"Yeah, I know, M/n, but it's dirty. Plus, I think it gets pretty uncomfortable seeing that stain on your shirt and it gets sticky. Yeugh." Felix pretended to barf which got you laughing softly. Felix, though not trying to be funny, whatever he does it always seemed so funny to you.

"Fine, fine. I'll go change, the problem though is that I didn't bring an extra shirt with me today." You told Felix scratching your nape.

"Really? Well, I guess we have to borrow from one of the group's." Felix suggested, but your eyes grew sizes bigger upon hearing that and waved your hands.

"No way, Felix! I have already done enough damage, I can't afford to borrow a shirt from one of the members, or to you even." You told him, but it all fell on deaf ears as Felix refused to listen. "I'm just trouble, Felix. You don't have to worry about me."

Felix hummed with two fingers pinching his chin gently. "Yeah, I don't think so." He took your wrist and started to drag you back to the dressing room. "Come on, I know there's someone willing to let you borrow a shirt." You just sighed, knowing that Felix won't even dare to change his mind when he had already set them on something.

Alas, as you two got there, none of the members even had a spare shirt to let you borrow. They were very willing and even tried to look around if there was anything, but to no avail. Although, there was one last person you didn't ask. "Hyunjin. You were the cause of this mess, you let him borrow your shirt." Felix sternly told the older male who pilled his brows together.

"What?! No way! Are you telling me I'd offer to do something for that guy? No!" Hyunjin retorted making Felix growl.

Felix was so ready to throw punches at the male who didn't seem to be bothered by the situation, but you just put a hand on Felix's shoulder and assured him. "That's alright, Felix. My sweater was thick enough to not get my undershirt wet. Although, I'm grateful for your effort." You smiled at him and sighed.

Just in time, you heard a call from one of your co-manager that the group was already being requested to be at the stage right now. You gave them an encouraging smile as they all did the same. "Alright boys. It's time to go out there and meet millions of your fans."

The group all shouted, excluding Hyunjin, hurray and hurried out to get on stage, you following behind after you were able to discard your sweater, leaving you only on your black t-shirt. You shivered at the cold now that you were left with a thin clothing that wasn't appropriate for the type of weather you were having and not mention that the place was fully air-conditioned.

Your shaking was not too evident, but one of the members, Seungmin, was able to notice it. Feeling pity he made his way to Hyunjin and tried to convince him. "Jinnie, M/n's cold. Please lend him your jacket, at least. He'll get sick if he continues to get exposed to the cold."

"Better for him."

"Hyunjin, please... Besides, you're already wearing thick layers of clothes why not let M/n borrow." Seungmin reasoned out and solemnly knitted his brows to persuade the male, Hyunjin rolling his eyes at his bestfriend and huffed before taking his jacket off of him and handed it over to Seungmin who silently squeaked. "Thanks, Hyunjin." Hyunjin brushed it off with a 'whatever', the younger of the two jogging his way towards you and gave you the jacket he got from Hyunjin. "I noticed your shivering, so I want you to take this jacket and no, you can't say you can't accept it."

You nodded your head at him and took the jacket from his hands. "Thank you, Seungmin."

"My pleasure." He smiled at you with those puppy dog like smile. He skipped back to reunite with his group while you put on the jacket that Seungmin offered you. You were still in thought though how Seungmin was able to convince Hyunjin to let you borrow his jacket. You knew Hyunjin owned the jacket since he wouldn't let them go since the moment you arrived.

You noticed how the jacket was too big for you, since the sleeves of the piece of clothing only let your fingers peek out through the holes while the flaps reached further down your hips, but it totally felt cozy and smelled like... Hyunjin. How do you explain it? You don't even know where to begin. It was him. The reason why you wanted to work with Stray Kids. You didn't want to look like you were some type of stalker, but all you ever wanted was to befriend Hyunjin.

The befriending process didn't go the way you actually thought it would go. Everytime his eyes met yours or you heard his voice you'd get all flustered and so nervous that your tongue always gets tied, the words you want to tell him gets trapped inside your mouth. It all started to be just an admiration towards the slightly older male until your determination to become his friend gradually became an unknown feeling towards Hyunjin, until realizing later that you actually liked the group's rapper, despite all his bad treatment towards you.

Back to reality, you hugged yourself and took in the wonderful scent the artist gave off until one of your co-worker nudged you. "Hey, stop sniffing the clothes. You totally look like a sasaeng."

"W-what? I wasn't sniffing anything." You denied it earning an eye roll. Later, you heard the whole place bursted into shouts of joy and excitement as Stray Kids made their appearance on the stage greeting all their fans inside and outside of the place. They all took their turns taking the mic to express their happiness and gratefulness to their ocean of fans that filled up the whole place.

Soon, the group was seated at a long rectangular table that was a perfect fit letting all the members seat on their respective seats. There were chairs as well settled in front of the table with each settled across a specific member.

You were appointed to keep guard and stand behind Hyunjin, in any case of fans throwing shade at him or any forms of harm or hate towards the member who had just been caught up in a supposed bullying rumor.

The line started to form as people who were present inside the place took their turns to talk to each member and get a sign from them. So far, you could only wonder how paranoid the company was to keep you on guard of Hyunjin when all these people here are Stays and they wouldn't do such thing to throw hate to any members in the group. Right?

The line was still too long to be gone in just minutes making you sigh, hearing your tummy rumble hoping that no one heard that. You now finally regret not eating that noodles that Chan offered you, the hunger finally hitting your system as your tummy continued to grumble. You pursed your lips and forced your eyes closed while you brought your head down in embarrassment. 'Fuck... why now?'

After a short while, the line was starting to get shorter and shorter, you thanking the heavens for the fast passing by of the time. But, the moment you least expected to happen happened. You felt a harsh tap on your legs and another and another after it finally took your attention, getting a little shocked that the action was done by the person who hated you the worst. "Take it before I change my mind." He told you. You complied and bowed at him politely as he tuts his tongue. "Who would even think of going to work on an empty stomach?"

'You... poured it on me?' You thought then shrugging it off before you looked at the treat offered to you by Hyunjin. You wondered what type of bread it was and hesitated, although Hyunjin's back was facing you he was able to sense your hard time on trying to eat what he gave you.

"It's not poisoned, M/n." He whispered as he signed the album that had his photo on it, then looking up at the fan who would like to talk to him.

Their talk wasn't audible to you, but you opened the packaging of the nicely wrapped pastry and bit on it with your body facing the wall so your back was turned against the people to cover yourself while you ate. One of your co-manager did notice your unwanted behavior and stomped his way to you and took the baked good from your hands and threw it to the ground to step on it and crush it good. "What do you think you're doing, L/n?! You're being inappropriate right now." He gritted out to you with a small voice almost like a whisper so no one else would hear you two. You bowed your head subtly before a hand was placed right below your chin as you looked up at him confused. "Spit." He ordered, referring to the food you were chewing.

You nod your head and spit out the food that was in your mouth into his hand while he picked up the wasted food and left, then threw it all at a trash can. "Fuck." You sighed as you held your chest and slowly turned around to face the non-existent line, the group now interacting with their fans.

Just looking at them now, you were able to remember when you were the one who was there seated at the chairs shouting out the name of the person you would call as your bias, which is no other than Kim Seungmin. At least, when you still didn't take the job to be one of the group's manager. Usually, it would only take one manager to manage the group, but why did this group require another one? You questioned yourself. It was all unexplained to you, but all you gotta do was to just be glad that you get to be friends with the people you see as your role models.

"Hyunjin-ah! When did you start trading jackets with your manager?" The question came out as a shout that got everyone laughing, including the group. You were only able to chuckle knowing that it was Seungmin who convinced Hyunjin to let you borrow his jacket.

Hyunjin didn't get to answer the question, when another fan spoke from the crowd that got every fans' attention. "Are rumors true that you don't treat Manager L/n well?"

Chan furrowed his brows and picked up his microphone. "Where did you get this story?" He chuckled trying to make it sound that it wasn't true and just pure bluff. Chan looked at Hyunjin with the face that told Hyunjin that he should start treating you well if he didn't want the netizens to know about his treatment towards you. "Anyways, it's seriously not true."

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A few minutes later and the event was finally finished and the group was bidding their goodbyes to their fans as they started to walk backstage. You waited for them at their waiting room with a handful of bottled waters for the boys to pick up once they get inside. The door soon opened revealing the group with a tense atmosphere following them that got you so confused. "Hey—"

"Hyunjin. If word gets out about your mistreatment to M/n, that would be a serious damage to our image and to M/n as well, 'cause he's obviously in pain because of you!" Chan yelled at the trouble causing male who only rolled his eyes paying no heed to his warning.

"Atleast, I never went too far as to really hurt him physically." Hyunjin deadpanned Chan growling at his response. Your eyes flickered to Hyunjin, then to Chan not knowing what to do in this situation.

"You are seriously being a jerk right now, Hyunjin." Chan fumed in anger while Hyunjin just continued to act deaf and played on his phone. Chan, giving up, sighed and plopped down on his seat. "Ayayay."

They took turns in getting your glances as you thought of a way to calm the atmosphere. You had already been their manager for a over a year now and this was the only time that Hyunjin ever spoke up to Chan and, to top it off, with sass and without the slightest feeling of being bothered. That was the moment you felt like you had enough. You've had enough with all these things. You were tired of yourself to even think that Hyunjin would finally soften up to you and be his friend. You were wrong to even apply for this kind of job. The group wouldn't be fighting if it hadn't been for you appearing in their lives all so suddenly. "Guys... let him do as he pleases. I'll be the one to take of whatever the netizens hear."

Chan raised his eyes up at you with furrowed brows. "What do you plan on doing? Whatever it is don't do it."

You smiled and nodded. "I won't, Chan." You held up the bottles in your hands and turned on a toothy smile. "Water? Anyone?" They all sighed in relief and got their turns in picking their own bottled water, the last one not being picked up by Hyunjin, so you decided to give it to him. You brought the cold drink to his face making him flinch as he looked up at you. "Thank you for the bread, by the way." You told him and giggled. "I've already packed your jacket in your bag." You informed him and patted his back.

The once crazily terrifying atmosphere now turned into a more comfortable one, the one you always would want to see. You didn't know what got you the courage to speak or blurt out whatever you had in your mind, but you looked at Hyunjin and said: "Hyunjin, can I talk to you privately?" Thankfully, their loud voices was able to distract themselves from hearing your request to Hyunjin who sighed and nodded his head. He stood up from his seat and started to move outside of the room. You followed behind closely, feeling intimidated by the month older's tall figure. "Hyunjin..."

"Cut to the chase, M/n. I don't have much time." He told you as you nod your head in understanding and fiddled with your fingers.

"I know, you'd probably like hearing this, but could I have the permission to quit as your group's manager?" You asked him, his forehead creasing that made him pull his brows together. "I was able to notice what the group had become the moment I became your manager—"

"And do you think quitting would change it?" Hyunjin asked you with a raised brow. "If anything, it'd probably—no, it would break their hearts to know that you quitted. If you do so, you're not only quitting as a manager, but as their friend as well."

"And you're able to say that after you purposely tried to have me fired or suspended from work by offering me that bread?" You sarcastically answered, Hyunjin clearing his throat.

"Well... that wasn't my intention. I didn't even know it'd get you fired." Hyunjin replied making you chuckle.

"Yeah..." You replied with a sad smile. "But, I don't wanna be the reason why you and Chan would always fight. Stray Kids is Stray Kids because they're fun and loving, caring. And I don't want to change that by being around the group." Hyunjin never replied anymore and you sighed. "I'm heading back now." You said and as you started to walk back inside, Hyunjin spoke.

"I wish you never entered our life, at all, M/n." He told you that got your heart broken into pieces. Sure, you admitted that he never liked you even just a bit, but him saying it so bluntly to you, it's like he does really mean it and could only care less. You were about to speak when Hyunjin beat you to it. "If so, I wouldn't be able to garner these undeniable feelings I have for you."

You froze. Were you hearing right? You just cleaned your ears this morning, well you do it everyday. Is your ear trying to play with you? "W-what?"

"DAMN! WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT?!" You gasped with your mouth full of popcorn, your boyfriend, Hyunjin seated beside you at the movie theater. He smiled at you admiring how cute you looked with your shocked expression that was being illuminated by the big screen. "Jinnie! Look, they're gonna kiss! AH!!" As the two actors in the movie was about to kiss, one of the movie's cast bursted out of the door cutting the kiss and earned a few 'oh's and 'I hate you, Chan's. "Chan is such a cock blocker."

"Watch your mouth, babe." Hyunjin told you making you pout.

"It's true, though!" You retorted and Hyunjin could only laugh at your cuteness and honest opinions.

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