All eyes are set and all expections are bound to fall on shoulders. Not a single coherent thought passes by the walker, just a clear command of an action. To walk.
Continuity requires familiarity. An achiever has only one goal in mind. To continue achieving exemplary recognitions. Achievement requires willingness to be put under strains and pressure for a long period of time with the intention of finishing. I have never felt anything close to any achievement in studying.
But hearing, “You can’t force someone to do something that they don’t want to do.” and then right after that, a comparison—the root of all sadness and my madness. All that I did, all the effort I put, and all the time I spent feels wasted on the tongue that says it’s not enough and unworthy after everything. Because I did want to do it, but right now, it’s just too far out of reach and my head is once again full of do better’s.
In this house, education is deemed as something to absorb every second with gratefulness. But what I want is far from what is in this house. If this unfamiliarity to an environment I will have to live through with the rest of my life persists, will I be able to continue living at all?
All eyes are set and all expections are bound to fall on my shoulders. Not a single coherent thought passes by my mind, just a clear command of an action. To endure.