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lena-in-a-red-dress · 11 hours

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Blue and Fire Engine Red Pt 9

“Are you sure you want to do this? I won’t go easy on you.”

Lena’s voice is light in its challenge, but edged with true competition.

It’s been more than a month since their confrontation, when they’d mutually agreed to keep things going. For much of that time, Lena had existed on tenterhooks, waiting for some other shoe to fall. But Kara was patient, and when nothing happened to threaten their happiness, Lena had finally relaxed, bringing a return to her playful confidence.

Kara bares her teeth in a grin. “Bring it.”

Today is the day of the intramural baseball championships, pitting the best of FDNC and NCPD against each other. They’d thought it would be fun to participate, neither thinking they’d ever manage to face the other in an actual game. Yet here they were, Precinct 42 facing off against Station 13.

“Hey!” Nia calls from the bench area. “No cavorting with the enemy, Lieutenant!”

Lena’s face creases into an exasperated eyeroll. Kara cherishes the sight, the memory of her girlfriend’s guarded features still fresh in her memory.

“Duty calls,” she drawls, leaning in for a final pre-game kiss.

“No smooching the enemy either!”

Lena huffs as Kara guffaws, giving Lena a swat to the butt as they split to return to their respective teams. Kara hears Lena say something about psyching out the competition, but Nia’s disbelief is equally audible.

“Sure, Jan.”

Kara jogs a lap around the diamond, doing her best not to stare at Lena’s legs as she does a series of lunge stretches. When Lena moves to side bends, the edge of her jersey rides up to expose a slice of skin that makes Kara nearly trip over her own feet. When Lena turns and bends backwards, stretching her spine, her grin tells Kara that she knows exactly what she’s doing.

Suddenly, Lena pauses mid-stretch. Though she straightens casually, Kara sees her eyes scan the field, then the bleachers, searching for something. Concern flashes through Kara, but before she can approach Lena, Winn Schott trots towards her.

“Hey Danvers. You ready to crush your girlfriend?”

His smile is broad and bright, and Kara automatically smiles in reciprocation. She hadn’t spent much time with Officer Schott before joining the team, but over the course of the season she’s learned that he’s a good sport, playful yet dedicated. She likes him.

“You know Lena,” she returns, “she’s not one to do things halfway.”

Winn’s nose wrinkles. “Okay, did not need to know that about you guys.” He earns a smack to the shoulder, and breaks into giggles. “Okay, okay, you know I’m joking!”

Glancing back over the field, Kara sees that Lena has been similarly wrangled, circled up with her teammates. Her focus seems to be entirely on the huddle, so Kara lets her shoulders relax.

“Come on,” she tells Winn. “Let’s get going.”

The game is close. Too close. It comes down to the final inning, with two outs and the bases loaded. The Hot Shots are at bat, trailing by one, but the Moody Blues need only one more out to end the game. From her position at shortstop, Kara swallows with anticipation as Lena steps towards the plate. The rest of her team cheers, while Kara’s jeers. Kara remains silent, mentally calculating how Lena might play it. She’s been hitting hard all game, making Kara’s team work to collect the ball and wing it back towards the bases before doubles and triples can turn into full homers. And in this suspenseful moment, Kara wouldn’t put it past Lena to fire a line drive directly into Kara’s knees.

She settles in, watching Lena’s relaxed strides to the plate, casually knocking the bat against her cleats to dislodge the packed dirt. Then, she settles into her ready stance, and waits. The pitcher winds up and drives the ball over home plate. Lena doesn’t swing. On the second, she even dodges as the pitch careens too close to her, much to the Hot Shots’ outrage. After a warning from the umpire, the exhausted pitcher takes a beat, spits, then readies himself.

The pitch is so fast Kara barely registers it’s been thrown, but the answering crack of the bat is unmistakable. Kara traces the arc of the ball up, up, and away, across the field and over the scoreboard on the far end, out of sight. Home run. Lena takes her victory lap at a trot as the other runners cross home plate one after the other, picking up her pace when she sees her team surging towards her in celebration.

While Lena gets showered with praise and gatorade, Kara laughs as her team groans and curses, sprawling on their backs in the dirt, exhausted. It’s been a tough one, giving as good as they got, but where the other officers wallow in disappointment, Kara feels exhilarated.

“Jesus,” Winn says, panting as he crosses to her from second base. “Is she superwoman?”

Kara shoots him a cocked grin, and after a beat of staring his eyes go wide. “Oh! God– Danvers, I did not mean it like that!”

Slapping him on the back, Kara chuckles. “Later, Schott!”

She trots over to the other team, wading into the crowd of bodies until she’s planted herself in front of Lena. She grips Lena’s face with both hands and kisses her soundly, dust and sweat and all. It surprises Lena, evidenced by the slight glaze in her eyes when Kara draws back.

“Good game,” Kara all but shouts to be heard. As Kara smiles up at her, she sees the tiniest wrinkle appear between Lena’s eyebrows. Green eyes lift to scan the area around them, her chin even swiveling to check behind her. Kara’s hackles lift; she knows that look– the sense of being watched.

“What’s wrong?” she asks.

Lena doesn’t respond, and Kara realizes that she hasn’t heard between the din and distraction. She touches Lena’s arm, pulling her girlfriend’s attention back towards her.

“Everything okay?”

Lena blinks, staring for a long moment before she shakes her with a disarming smile. “Yeah. Of course.”

“Hey lovebirds!” Nia calls. “Come on! We gotta treat the losers to pizza and ice cream!”

“It is tradition,” Brainy confirms. “To ease the sting of failure.”

Kara turns back to Lena, smirking. “Oh darn. Guess I’ll have to wait to give you your prize at home…”

Lena’s gaze sharpens as her words register, her previous distraction swiftly turning to hunger. “You know, I have some ice cream in my freezer–”

“Nope!” Kara chirps. “Come on, babe. Pizza and ice cream wait for no man.”

Under the din, Kara hears a plaintive whimper. Her insides melt as she settles her hand into Lena’s hand and gives a promising squeeze.

All in good time, it says. All in good time.

—

Later that night, Kara wakes up deliciously sore, and not just from the game. She lengthens her body under the covers, stretching some of the ache away. It’s a few bleary moments before she understands exactly what’s woken her.

Lena twitches and jerks in the bed beside her, her brow furrowed with anguish. Her lips move indiscernibly, silenced in sleep. A nightmare. Kara reaches to shake her awake, but retracts her hand at the last moment. She’s heard stories of unsuspecting partners trying to rouse their loved ones awake, only to be made part of the nightmare itself. She knows Lena would never consciously attack her, but in sleep? With a monstrous trauma and undisclosed past hanging over her? Kara knows better than to believe she would be an exception to the possibility.

Suddenly, Lena spasms, lashing out with a long arm. Kara only just manages to dodge before rolling out of bed and onto her feet. “Shit,” she hisses. She flips on the light on her bed stand, casting a glow throughout the room. Lena’s movements are more noticeable now, rocking to either side as though to dislodge something sitting on her chest. Her arm flails again before clenching the sheet in a white-knuckled grip.

Kara considers her options, but before she’s able to make a decision, Lena bolts upright with a sharp gasp, so suddenly that Kara flinches back in surprise. Lena’s head whips back and forth frantically, scanning the room. She jumps when she sees Kara standing beside the bed, eyes flying wide before recognition hits. For a brief moment they can do nothing but stare at each other. Kara’s sure her eyes are as wide as Lena’s which soon glaze with tears. Finally, Lena sighs, deflating a little as she wipes a hand over her face.

“Fuck,” comes the inevitable mumble. Kara watches tentatively as Lena scans the room again before slowly sliding her legs over the side of the bed, turning away from Kara. Her night shirt clings to her in cold sweat, and her hair hangs limp around her shoulders.

“You okay?” Kara asks, clearing her throat.

Lena nods without looking up. “Yeah.” Her voice is little more than a croak, and does nothing to reassure Kara. In the end, Lena sniffles huskily and swipes again at her eyes. “I’m going to get some water. You can go back to sleep. Sorry I woke you.”

With that she slips out of the room as quiet as a wraith. Kara stares after her, at a loss for what to do next. In the quiet that follows, she realizes she’s also trembling, her body stiff with adrenaline.

“Fuck,” Kara echoes Lena’s sentiment. She drops onto the side of the bed, resting her elbows heavily on her knees as she rubs her cheeks. She doesn’t feel afraid, but her body does. Only when her hands stop shaking does she rise and venture from the bedroom. Lena doesn’t look up when Kara enters the living room, but doesn’t protest when KAra settles down next to her.

Her shoulders are hunched, arms crossed around her middle, a glass of water forgotten on the coffee table. They sit in silence for several long minutes– Lena not ready to speak, and Kara loathe to break the quiet. Finally, Lena forces herself upright, lifting her head to reveal solemn features.

“You were smart,” she says roughly. “Getting out of bed.”

Kara takes it as an invitation to take Lena’s hand, who allows their fingers to intertwine. Clearing her throat, Lena looks at her.

“Did I hurt you?”

“No,” Kara promises, shaking her head quickly. “I’m good. Are you good?”

Lena doesn’t respond. Tension still limns her frame, her breathing almost shallow as they sit, as though Lena can’t pull in a full breath. An idea pops into Kara’s head, and she gives Lena’s hand a squeeze. “Hey. Wanna go for a walk?”

The offer is accepted with a quiet nod. After pulling on their sweatpants and sneakers, they step out into the night. They’re the only ones on the street at this hour, and they hold hands as they silently walk towards the nearby park. When the scent of sleeping trees drifts across their senses, Kara finally feels Lena start to relax. The air isn’t quite chill, just cold enough to bring a tint of pink to her partner’s cheeks.

Halfway across the bridge spanning a small creek, Lena draws to a stop against the wrought iron rail. Kara watches her turn her head to the sky, eyes reflecting every star peeking through the cloud cover. Soft moonlight dapples across Lena’s skin, and Kara feels her heart lurch, stuttering a little with an emotion she can’t quite describe.

“Thanks,” Lena murmurs. “This was a good idea.”

Kara slides closer, until the warmth of Lena’s shoulder melds with hers. “It always helped me, when I had nightmares. After the shooting, there were nights I felt like I was still in that bathroom stall, with the walls closing in.” She smiles thinly. “Sometimes a little breeze is enough to ground a person.”

“Or blow them away entirely.” Lena’s voice is even, but low. Vulnerable.

Kara gazes at her. “Is that how you feel right now? Like you might blow away?”

Lena sighs, then turns her gaze from the sky to Kara. “Let’s just say it’s not the breeze keeping me grounded.” Her thumb brushes the back of Kara’s hand in soft circles, sending a thrum of something deep through Kara. She leans her head against Lena’s shoulder, gazing out across the trees lining the creek while Lena returns her attention to the sky.

“It’s actually one of the things I miss about the desert,” Lena says gently. Kara hums a low question. “The sky. You could see the whole Milky Way out there, painting the entire sky. It was… breathtaking. Even on the most miserable days, it still awed me.”

You awe me, Kara longs to say. You are breathtaking.

She doesn’t.

“Maybe we could go camping,” she suggests instead. “Chase the open sky.”

Lena grunts, but the sound of it doesn’t completely nix the idea. Kara bumps her with a hip.

“I could see you on a Harley for sure.”

Finally, Lena laughs. “Nah,” Lena returns. “We’ll take the truck– sleep in the bed.”

“With all the rust mites? Psh.”

“All right, fine. Just some bedrolls around a fire. Like Xena and Gabrielle.”

Kara grins. “Can I be Xena?”

“Nope. You’ve the soul of a poet, Miss Artiste.”

It draws a chuckle from Kara. When Lena lifts her arm, Kara tucks herself against her, soaking in the proximity.

I love you, she wants to say. I cherish you.