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#satan
reality-detective · 2 days
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Satan talked smoothly and led many followers into deception. 🤔
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radarchives · 16 hours
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trashytoastboi · 2 days
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Seven Days of Sin Event
~Angst Alphabet Shorts part 1~
> Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, Belphegor
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Lucifer
I: Injured: How do they handle themselves when they’re injured?
🎶 He’s more likely to hide the fact that he’s injured. He doesn’t want you all to worry or fuss over him. At most he might trust someone to help him out if he’s not able to hide it completely. He trusts you enough to tell you when he’s injured. Only because you’ll notice and worry if he keeps it from you as he has in the past. Lucifer always believes he has to handle things himself and hide anything he believes to be weakness, including his injuries. 
M: Mistakes: How much do they want to fix the mistakes of their past?
🎶 Lucifer once upon a time tried to go back. That's all he wanted, all he thought about. Going back and fixing everything before it was even done. Why did things turn out the way that they did? He never could bring himself to understand. But now… After finding out the result of their choice, he’s content. Now that they had come to terms with their grief and adjusted to life, then things have happened and they created a new home and memories. Now he doesn’t dwell on the wish to go back as much. 
V: Vent: How do they get rid of feelings they find unnecessary? 
🎶 He buries his feelings, pushes them aside or finds an outlet like working. Lucifer never entrusted anyone with his worries or he felt that it would be an unnecessary burden for people so he bottles it up. Until it explodes into the messiest breakdown that you’d never see, because he holds it together until he’s alone and can just let everything consume him violently. Snot, tears, spit, everything. It’s a mess, he’s a mess. He’d never allow anyone to see him in such a way. 
Q: Qualify: What parts of themselves do they consider dangerous? 
🎶 His determination to protect his family. There’s no depths that he would not stoop to if it’s for their sake. Lucifer may be prideful but he’s willing to cast it aside for the sake of his brothers and let no one stand against him. He’s scared of what he’s capable of doing for them. 
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Mammon
A: Accident: Would they blame themselves if you died in an accident?
💰 He would blame himself, saying he should have stopped you. Or at least been there to prevent the situation from happening. He’d question himself, he’d punish himself. Why wasn’t he at your side? What was so important that he left you alone and allowed this to happen. If you were there you’d tell him not to blame himself. It was an accident, something no one foresaw. No one could have predicted it, or stopped it and Mammon tearing himself apart while believing otherwise is a painful sight for everyone to see. 
R: Rock: What weighs them down?
💰 Sometimes he thinks back to the days in the celestial realm. He’s moved on, as best as he can and he’s living his life now. Albeit as a demon, a far cry from the divine being he once was. Sometimes he’ll do something, amplified and compelled by his sin and he’ll catch himself wondering why he’s like this now and why he couldn’t return to the way he was before. 
Y: Yearning: Do old memories make them yearn for your touch 
💰 When you said a tearful farewell to everyone and left the Devildom to return to the human realm. Mammon was LOST. He didn’t know what to do without you there. Every day he got up he’s the first one running to your room to get you, only to knock on a door that no one was going to answer. He’d miss you, and all the affection you’d give him. The hugs when he was sad, holding his hands to stop him from pickpocketing a poor unsuspecting soul, or how you would praise him and touch his head. He misses all of that so much. Why’d you have to leave? 
Z: Zest: Add your own letters (A/N: Treating this like a wildcard and will just put a random headcanon) 
💰 Mammon does not know how to deal with grief. Even hypothetically, you’ve had the conversation with him, the question of what he’d do when you pass. It was inevitable, you’re human, your lifetime is not long enough to match his. You would grow old, eventually passing on and you’d have to part ways permanently. Mammon couldn’t bring himself to answer because he refused to think about it. He can’t imagine it. A world and you’re nowhere in it. 
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Leviathan
I: Injured: How do they handle themselves when they’re injured?
🎮 He’s not a baby per se, but he’s not hiding it. Honestly he wants you to dote on him. He’d tell only you and ask you to keep it a secret. He’s good at handling the pain because he’d tell you it’s just a little scratch when in actuality it’s a lot more dire and deep than he led you to believe. He wants to feel that someone cares and so he’d tell you, the person who Levi knows would treat him tenderly and kindly while he’s healing. 
M: Mistakes: How much do they want to fix the mistakes of their past?
🎮 Levi had too many things he wanted to fix. Sometimes anxiety would make even the most mundane mistake one worthy of fixing. If he sits and considers all the things he wanted to fix then the anxiety would swallow him whole. The big, the small, the tragic and the things that brought about real changes in indescribable ways. He wants to go back, he wants that redo button but in the moments when he’s content with life he really thinks about it. Is that what he truly wanted? At the risk of losing what he had now? Sometimes the thought alone eased it. 
R: Rock: What weighs them down?
🎮 The way he is. He says, his self depreciation always leads into dark territory and he can name more flaws than things he likes about himself. He sees himself through the worst lens and believes himself to be useless amongst other names he’d gladly label himself with. He regrets the way he is, it’s a heavy thing. It takes a bit of encouragement, a lot of steady affirmation to convince him of otherwise and he craves validation to convince him. A single bad word can tear down any positive self esteem he builds up. 
Z: Zest: Add your own letters (A/N: Treating this like a wildcard and will just put a random headcanon)
🎮 Genuinely wants to get better at connecting with people. He believes most of his problems would be solved if he could just connect with people. He says the wrong thing and will retreat, punishing himself for it. It was an honest mistake but would they see it that way. Levi goes into things always assuming people hate him and want nothing to do with him. Never do open invitations with him, unless he’s invited specifically he will assume that you don’t want him there. 
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Satan
O: Outrage: What makes them angry?
📚 A lot can set him off, he’s volatile. He doesn’t mean to be and he’s trying to work on it but it’s hard when he’s surrounded by people that drive him up the walls. Satan honestly hated the fact that he felt no respect from anyone. There was nothing but fear, and evasiveness. People had no respect for his personal space and it irked him, how they would touch him without his consent when all he wanted was to be left alone. Or when they would come into his room- his ONLY safe space and take away the very thing that made it safe. 
P: Pressure: What stresses them to the breaking point? 
📚 Satan has a lot of triggers and sadly unlike most who can calm down and get back to normality, his emotions stack up. They stack, and stack until they have no more outlet aside from OUT. They explode and so does he. Most of his outbursts aren’t caused by a simple momentary anger, it’s a piling effect of things that were simmering under the surface. The more people are afraid of him, the more he tries to control himself, fails to do so and it makes it worse. He grows fearful of himself and it becomes a vicious cycle. 
T: Time: What if they had a limited time to live?
📚 He wouldn’t tell anyone. He’d leave. He’d go somewhere where he could be alone and spend his time doing things he likes until it was time to say goodbye. He would do so, alone, peacefully and no one would know. That was his initial answer when you asked this question the first time. His relationship with his brothers changed, grew and became something precious. His relationship with you- evolved into something deeper. Had you asked him this question again, he would want to be supported by all of you, and loved until the moment he leaves with you all by his side. 
Y: Yearning: Do old memories make them yearn for your touch? 
📚 Satan tries not to dwell on it too much, he doesn’t want to deal with the extra emotions. The answer however is yes, he’d remember you and your absence grows only more pronounced. He’d think of when he could lay his head in your lap, reading his book while your fingers played with his hair. It was calming, he could fall asleep, feeling safe with you. That was no longer there and you, his safe space, are no longer there. He’d remember your touches as something calming, filled with love and safety. He feels lost without it. He misses it. 
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Asmodeus
E: Emotion: What emotions do they tend to push away the most?
💅🏻 Insecurity - Asmodeus never wants to doubt himself. He ignores it, when he looks at himself and doubts his appearance, his existence. Feeling too far removed from what he once was, Asmo needed to embrace this new life. Find security or distraction so his thoughts didn’t discard who he’d become, so his past self couldn’t scorn him and look down on him. Asmo piled on compliment after compliment, found people to cater to his dire need to be praised and validated, to be praised as beautiful. He needed to hear it so much that he himself could believe it. 
G: Great pain: What is the most painful thing they’ve witnessed?
💅🏻 The fall of his brothers and himself. The moment all of those who were once his allies treated them as traitors, the fight was vicious. There was no choice though, this is what they chose. To save their family, and protect Lilith. Asmo would never forget, not really forget. He could get moments of peace when his mind was far too occupied, focused on the moment that he couldn’t think about it. The moment he saw despair and regret, the utter pain that encompassed them all and the forced shame they felt. 
K: Kill: Would they kill for revenge? 
💅🏻 10/10 He absolutely would. Should someone hurt you or his brothers, Asmodeus is vindictive enough to hunt them down and kill them. He wouldn’t grant them the mercy of a quick death either and would get really sadistic about it. He’d forget himself and gladly become the monster when exacting such a brutal revenge. To send a message, to put himself at ease, even when he knows revenge is empty and cold. It wouldn’t bring anyone back or change what had been done. 
R: Rock: What weighs them down?
💅🏻 Self destructive tendencies. Asmo is aware of them and he hides them well. Most people wouldn’t notice his unkind habits because he disguises them so well. Asmo knows what he’s doing, he wants to stop but he finds comfort in them. So he continues to do them every time he feels overwhelmed, he does it to feel a semblance of control. The result is met with him talking himself down, trying to stop doing it but he always falls into familiar habits. 
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Beelzebub
S: Sorrow: Would they feel empty after your death?
🍔 He’d be so lost without you. Beel would fall back into the deep pain of grief, a feeling that you helped him heal from and now he’s got to experience it with you. It’s too much, he’d be feeling so much at once that wouldn’t be able to decide what feels worse than the other. The sadness? The disbelief? The anger? Cycling through reasons of things to blame for your passing. Himself? You? Beel prays, something he hadn’t done for a long time. He wants to wake up from the nightmare because this is not reality. Everyone knows it’s hard on Beel when he doesn’t even eat. 
U: Urge: How badly do they get the urge to see you after separating?
🍔 Beel misses you terribly. When you go back to the human world. He’s always messaging, calling, asking when you’re going to be back. When he can see you again and hold you. He’s missing you. He’s asking Lucifer every second day if he could go see you and Lucifer of course says no so Beel resorts to plotting with his brothers to secretly come and visit you. 
L: Loss: What was their greatest loss? 
🍔 Lilith. For all the brothers it was the hardest loss they had to experience, but in particular for Beel and Belphie who held a deep relationship with Lilith; it was the most devastating loss. Beel blames himself for so much, and still believes it was his fault that she died. Gradually, things get better. They do and the feelings that suffocated him became a little lighter, enough to let him breathe. He still shoulders the weight of her absence, and guilt. 
Q: Qualify: What parts of themselves do they consider dangerous?
🍔 His strength when it’s misused, or when he’s hangry. Beel has no control over himself during that time and can only see the destruction he caused after the fact. His insatiable hunger, when left to get out of control, is the most terrifying thing and people have been hurt as a result. His brothers struggle to control him or reign in his strength and can only watch when he's wreaking havoc. 
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Belphegor
W: Wild card: A random angst headcanon 
⭐ Started sleeping a lot more not only due to his sin. Belphie used it as a way to escape from everything when he first fell into the Devildom, the loss of Lilith, the loss of their home and their wings, when he and his brothers became demons and were forced into an unfamiliar and hostile place. Sleeping was the only quiet he found, away from his thoughts, his feelings and his reality. Dreams were better. 
C: Crying: Are they much of a crier?
⭐ Secret crier. He hides it well and he won’t make a peep. He’d bury himself under his pillows and sob his eyes out silently just to get all the feelings out. He sobbed himself to sleep every night when they first got to the Devildom. He knew everyone was struggling and couldn’t talk about what he was thinking about or feeling so he opted to cry alone. It was easier that way so he believed. 
H: Humiliation: How could they be humiliated? 
⭐ The early days of settling into Devildom, humiliation became a part of daily life. With the outright hatred and hostility from the demons towards the brothers who had just fallen. They went out of their way to sabotage them, to chase them away and highlight their differences and how they were not welcome anywhere. That separation, distinction and mockery of what they used to be is what caused relentless humiliation everyday for Belphie. 
K: Kill: Would they kill for revenge 
⭐ I mean for the sake of a grudge he held against all humans he nearly killed you- had it not been for Barbatos. It’s very likely for him to kill for revenge. He’d have no qualms about it, he’s got a motive and a means and if that person hurt him, or those close to him. His first solution is homicide. He’s very quick from point A to B with violence.
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Taglist: @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf @roninfromtheops
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anarcho-satanism · 3 days
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I made this satanic "mantra" using the well-known passage from Revelation 12:9 about Satan and adding the Ego Eimi (I Am) of Jesus. In this way, I "perverted" the Divinity of Christ by attributing it to the Devil. I present to you the text in Koine Greek, the transliteration, and the English translation.
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booknerd693 · 3 days
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Going to a new church this upcoming sinday. Gonna learn the word of jayzus all over again! Got banned from the last church I infiltrated, they caught on after they started doing routine "sweeps" by my house and seeing the "Fuck the Holy Ghost" sign. Oh well. Definitely not the type of "Devil's work" for all Satanists, but it is doing the Devil's work nonetheless. Thing is, this next one is going to take a lot more convincing, and "Hail Mary's" because everyone there knows that I am a very devoted Satanist, and pretty notorious in the area at that. One of the old preachers there has already confronted me with concerns, not liking the idea that I'm showing up at all. But wouldn't that just be un-christian of him to not welcome me with open arms? Well fuck, looks like he's got no choice, because I was invited by the clergy themselves anyways.
Hail Almighty Lord Father Satan! Good to be back on the rollercoaster of mindfuckery. Biggest gig I've done yet. After this maybe I'll have the nuts to infiltrate a mega-church and spread the word of SATAN worldwide. This is great.
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metalheadgirlie · 11 hours
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k-i-l-l-e-r-b-e-e-6-9 · 13 hours
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vera-deville · 2 days
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I told you I would send in a request, so here it is! This is an Obey Me one, if that's alright!
First off, have you ever seen Little Shop of Horrors? If not, please do! One, it's essential for this ask and it's also just a great movie! No pressure though!
Now, onto the real ask! So, if possible, I'd like to request a florist!MC. But a florist who's kind of like Seymour.
(Here's where the whole Little Shop of Horrors thing really comes in)
They come to the Devildom with Audrey II. It's got its roots wrapped around the MC's waist, and it's vines wrapped around their arms while snug. Of course, it's heavily off-putting because.. well. There's a humongous and terrifying plant just.. attached to this human.
But the brothers don't mind it, until months into the MC's stay as an exchange student when Audrey II starts talking. Then, they're all freaked out. They're even more freaked out when the MC is not only fine with it, but is willingly talking to it like it's normal!
(Bonus if they see the MC prick their finger and then just.. let Audrey II clean It off.)
(Yes, this came to me in a dream in the middle of a 20-minute-nap.)
So, what would the brothers think of this?
Feed Me Seymour!
05/17/2024 - 05/30/2024
Pairing: No pairing (you can think of the interactions as either platonic or romantic) Word Count: 3,351 Warnings: Reader pricks their finger, but they'll be alright; mentions of chapter 16 Gender: Gender Neutral (as it was not specified in the request) Tags: @g0dwat3r (if any of you would like to be added to my Obey Me taglist, please let me know)! Notes: Okay, I really love your brain Touya, because this is already a fantastic idea, but you know what I started thinking about? Morticia Addams. I don't know if you've seen the old Addams Family series, but Morticia has a carnivorous plant called Cleopatra, and I really wanted to include her in the story. I didn't, but I'm definitely thinking about writing it.
In which Y/N has a rather interesting plant friend(?)
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"Congratulations!
We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at the Royal Academy of Diavolo.
Please return this letter with your sign to confirm your participation.
We are looking forward to welcoming you as part of our new exchange program.
Yours sincerely,
Diavolo"
Huh? Royal Academy of Diavolo? Exchange Program? What was happening?
You tried to open your eyes, but there was nothing to see. Just pitch-blackness. It would have been more terrifying, but the soothing presence wrapped around your waist and arms helped. Quite a bit, at that. Clutching the stem of rice flowers close to your chest (although careful enough to not break the stem), you kept trying to see through the darkness for something, anything.
Soon enough, there was a voice. "We welcome you, human, to the demon student council."
The voice was stern, but pleasant, drawing your attention away from the darkness and to a room that was materializing in front of your eyes. It looked like a really goth courtroom, and you truly would have spent more time admiring the place if it wasn't for the ridiculously tall man who arose from the chief judge seat.
The man in question was handsome. Very much so. With burgundy hair, and a well-fitted suit, and skin so coppery sweet, it was no wonder that you couldn't help but stare.
And if you weren't so caught up in the man's appearance and the fact that you had no idea what on Earth was happening, perhaps you would have noticed that you weren't the only one staring.
You had to physically will yourself to pay attention not only to the man when he started speaking but the others in the room as well.
"Welcome to the Devildom, Y/N."
Astonishment enraptured your being for the simple reasons that this complete stranger somehow knew your name, and that every single person in the room was blessed with extremely good looks. The astonishment, unfortunately, did not go unnoticed.
"...Oh pardon me. Feeling a bit shocked, are we?" Asked the man with red hair. "Well that's understandable. You've only just arrived, after all." Arrived? Arrived where exactly? "As a human, it will probably take a little while for you to adjust to things here in the Devildom."
Okay yeah, this was some sort of really weird dream induced by your lack of sleep this past week. That's why there were really handsome dudes and that's why one was telling you weird stuff. Since it's a dream, there was no problem with going along with it, right?
"The Devildom?" You ask, feeling yourself relax a little more, now knowing that this is a dream.
"Yes, exactly, the Devildom. I see that you catch on quickly. Excellent." He replied.
Well, that didn't really answer anything.
You were about to ask for a better reply than that when he said, "I suppose I should start by introducing myself." Curious, you give him his moment. "My name is Diavolo. I am the ruler of of all demons, and all here know me." Cool. The dude's a demon king. Still not the weirdest thing you've ever dreamt. "And someday soon, I will be crowned king of the Devildom." Oh, he wasn't king yet. Then how's he a ruler already? You know what, it's probably best not to think too hard about it.
The so called ruler of the so called Devildom proceeded to explain about a school called R.A.D. and about a bunch of other stuff. The other demons (plus one that came in really late) introduced themselves as different demons of different avatars, and the more they spoke, the more you couldn't shake off a particular feeling.
It all felt too...real. You'd dreamt all sorts of things before, but a part of you somehow always knew that it was just a dream. But you didn't feel that this time. It felt far too real. The anxiety slowly crept back into your bones, a chilling effect settling over your being as your throat seemed to have something invisible lodged in it.
You tried telling them that you weren't meant to be here. That you were meant to be back home. You still had to finish your bouquet for Mrs. Harris, and you had a new shipment of peonies arriving in an hour. You hadn't finished watering all your plants. You hadn't cleaned up the shop. You still had so much left to do! You couldn't just be whisked away to some other world (that you still weren't entirely sure was a dream or not).
But alas.
You were told that there was no way they could send you back.
And if that wasn't bad enough, you had to go to school. You had assignments. You had tests. Oh and you were in what was basically hell.
Ain't that swell?
Throughout this whole ordeal, the plant around your waist remained dutifully wrapped around your figure, even nuzzling against your neck when she felt your discomfort.
Without much of a choice, you steeled yourself for the days in this foreign world that awaited you.
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The latest human addition to R.A.D. was a little...odd. None of the brothers nor the demon prince in the room wished to point out the very large plant that had wrapped itself around the human like some manner of serpent, especially since the human was completely unbothered by it.
Most of the brothers found it odd, of course. Solomon never walked around with a giant plant stuck to him, but then again, Solomon wasn't necessarily normal himself. A few of the brothers didn't find it in themselves to keep their thoughts quiet. Mammon in particular straight up screeched when he saw the plant, and maintained his distance (both emotionally and physically) and still the human did not seem to mind the plant.
Asmo found the plant ugly.
That was really the only way he could describe it.
It was ugly.
Satan had read stories of plants like this. In one book he read, the plant ended up eating a whole bunch of people. He only hoped that this was not a case like that story.
Beelzebub didn't really have an opinion on the plant. He could eat it, but it didn't really look too appetizing.
Diavolo himself was worried at first, because he was sure that humans didn't simply walk around with giant plants attached to them. When he told Barbatos about this odd situation, the ever loyal butler offered to look into the matter discreetly.
He found nothing.
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It had been many months since you had been whisked away to the Devildom (which you are now infinitely more familiar with). It was strange at first, and it took some getting used to, but you did it. Now, whenever you woke up to face the day ahead of you, you didn't do so in fear or anxiety or anything else.
You had grown accustomed to this new world.
In fact, you'd go so far as to say that you'd grown fond of the place.
Audrey II seemed to agree with this. Every morning, Audrey demanded a large meat dish to satisfy her hunger. The brothers assumed that you were a very hungry individual (Beel felt a deep hunger coming from you at all times), and didn't think much more of it. Every now and then, Audrey would crave a Backstabbing Sandwich (apparently it was particularly delicious), and you, having no other choice, entertained her food whims. What's the worst that could happen?
It was after the whole incident with Belphegor that you brought Audrey with you more often wherever you went. Though you and the brothers had slowly gotten past the incident, the trauma it left behind did not magically go away. Audrey II being the sweet thing she is, had no qualms to being carried around the Devildom (despite the lingering stares and questions that were thrown your way).
Today was a day that Audrey II would be coming with you. You were heading off to the flower shop you owned on Dogma Street. You originally were looking to open the shop at Silent Street, but Dogma Street caught your eye. The street itself was the biggest electronic district in the Devildom, and when you first proposed the idea to the brothers (and Diavolo and Barbatos) to open a flower shop there, they were quick to advice you not to. Why would you open a flower shop at a street primarily known for its electronics?
Still, you managed to push through, and you ended up becoming the quaint owner of a little shop next to an eatery on the street.
And wouldn't you know, it actually did pretty well.
Of course, since you were a student, you couldn't be at your shop full-time, and that's where two lesser demons come in - Terror and Dolor - a pair of siblings who often fought, but shared an interest in flora. They would take care of the shop in shifts, and seeing as you gave them the housing area right above the shop to stay in, you could make sure that they would be at your precious flower shop at (mostly) all times.
Today was planned to be their day off, which was fine by you, seeing as you hadn't been to the shop in a week and you desperately wanted to see your babies (plants) again.
You opened the door, causing a sweet bell to ring, signifying your arrival to your empoyees.
"Y/N!"
"You're back!"
Smiling, you greet your employees, Audrey still wrapped around you.
Terror and Dolor fawned over Audrey (they're really the only ones in the Devildom who do that apart from you) while you went inside to get your apron. Working at the flower shop had quite a few benefits. You could make your own money, go to work at your own time, and most importantly, you could be surrounded by the things that you love the most - flora (and Audrey).
Your flower shop was quaint (despite its large capacity). Many customers have complimented it, saying that it felt homely (which is exactly what you were going for, so mission accomplished successfully you supposed). Even Asmo loved the place, and oftentimes would post selfies from just about everywhere in your shop.
"Dolor, how's that order with the Bloody Acokanthera Oblongifolias going?" You asked the demon pruning Audrey II.
"Just finished it this morning! We shipped it along with the invoice for the flowers. The customer notified us that they would be making the payment by the end of today." Dolor replied.
Shooting a smile of satisfaction at him, you shooed the brothers out your shop, wishing for them to have a lovely day to do...well, whatever it was they did outside the shop. Right before they left, Terror told you that a certain demon butler had visited the shop earlier and left a letter for you, and how she placed it in your office.
With that in mind, you walked back into your shop, petting Audrey II as she sat on a table before walking into your office and grabbing the aforementioned letter.
Even without the knowledge from the siblings that Barbatos had delivered this letter to you, you would have been able to tell that it was he who wrote the letter. By this time in your adventures in the Devildom, you had come to recognize the handwriting of those you know. And while a few had impeccable writing (in cursive too), no one's writing was as elegant as Barbatos - not even Lucifer.
The letter read:
"Dearest Y/N, I am pleased to inform you that Lord Diavolo requires a fresh shipment of Dark Roses for an upcoming event at the castle. I sincerely apologize for the short notice, but please note that the master and I truly would have given you more time to prepare the notice had we been able to do so. We shall need enough roses to fill out the Crimson Room. I estimate that the number be around 50. We will need the roses delivered by tomorrow. Thank you, Barbatos"
You smiled, already having a good idea as to why the roses were needed. Some of the higher officials (not including the brothers you lived with) had been a little too finicky with their positions and though not a threat to the heir of the Devildom, they were starting to get on his nerves.
No matter.
Despite how sweet Diavolo seemed (and actually is), even the Crown Prince of the Devildom had his limits. Oh well. Those officials would get what was coming to them.
Your job was to simply provide the best roses for such an event.
With a newfound vigor, you made your way next door (you had originally bought two plots in the street and simply joined them together to create one shop. This area was where you kept some of your best grown flora (the rest were in an undisclosed location only you and a few others knew about). Typically, you the plants you grew in this area were popular - loads of customers would buy them. The rest of your plants were grown in the aforementioned undisclosed location. Despite this, there was one type of flower you grew in your shop which was by no means popular, but rather extremely rare.
Dark roses.
You fondly recall you and Barbatos planting a fresh batch of dark roses at the Demon Lord's Castle, and how he had given you some seeds to grow for yourself. What started off as a few roses quickly became much more, and now you were the exclusive propagator of dark roses in the Devildom. It was a monopoly you gladly encouraged (something Mammon also did).
The first step was to cut the roses. The roses had to be cut in a specific manner - a 45-degree angle and they had to be put in water immediately. This same method was used with roses back in the human realm (and gardeners would use the stems to grow new roses out of), but there was one key difference between the roses from back home and the dark roses in the Devildom. One of them could actually survive a little while without having to be immediately placed in water.
The other could not.
And that's part of the reason why dark roses were so rare in the Devildom. They were ridiculously hard to grow in the first place, but cutting them was an even bigger pain.
Luckily, you had loads of experience with these finicky things, so you had this in the bag.
After some time, you'd harvested almost 60 roses (some extras, just in case), and it was time to remove the thorns from their stems. Removing the thorns from the roses could be done using one of two different tools you had available in your shop. The first one were rose thorn cutters (made specifically for that purpose) that didn't look too different from a pair of nail cutters. The logic was that you'd slide the tool up to the top of the stem, press down on the handles gently, and then drag it down the stem, thus cutting off the thorns.
Though very efficient, the second tool was your favorite - a simply knife. Roses were woody in nature, so all you had to do was simply slice all around the stem of the flower. Admittedly, this took a lot more time than the thorn cutters, but in a way, it was stress relieving. You were sure that you'd end up using the thorn cutters, but you'd enjoy using the knife for as long as you could.
And so you got to work - de-thorning all 60 something roses by hand.
You'd gotten through more than half of the roses when you heard the bell of your shop jingle. Turning around, you saw none other than the brothers you shared a house with. But in doing so, you'd accidentally run the blade of the tool you were using right across your finger.
Woops.
Hissing, you pulled your gaze from the brothers and back to your finger. You could see the cut, but it took a moment for the blood to come out. It was painful, and you weren't too good with cuts (a little ironic, considering your profession), but before you could whisk your finger away to wash off the blood, Audrey II yelled, "Feed me! I'm starving" before she chomped down on your finger.
Of course, she didn't actually bite off your finger, but she sucked the blood out, and it made your finger more sore than it was already.
It wasn't anything out of the ordinary, of course. You'd gotten hurt loads of times when working (and even when you weren't working), and if there was blood (which there usually was), Audrey would just lick it off for your. Same old.
The brothers had seen you talk to Audrey II plenty of times before, hell (literally), you'd talk to just about every plant you came across, but never had they seen Audrey II talk to you.
If that wasn't shock enough, you just wiped your hands down on your apron before turning back to face the brothers and greet them with a smile as though you hadn't just nicked yourself and had your plant(?) lick your finger for you.
Of course, the greeting faltered on your tongue as soon as you saw the faces of the brothers.
Asmodeus spoke up first.
"Sweetie, your plant just talked!"
"Yeah?" You asked rhetorically. "What about it?" You watched as the brothers tried (and failed) to come up with words to say, although you didn't really understand why they were struggling so. Even Levi was stunned. In an attempt to make a joke (and to stifle the stifling atmosphere), you said, "It's not like you guys didn't know that Audrey could talk."
One look at their faces, and you knew that you were wrong.
"Wait, you guys actually didn't know that Audrey could talk!?" You asked, stunned at this new revelation.
At last, Lucifer gathered himself. "Ahem. We were not made...aware of the fact that your plant was sentient." He sure looked uncomfortable trying to explain his mind without offending you or Audrey.
"What do you think all that meat was being delivered for every morning Lucifer?" You asked sardonically.
"Wait, I thought that yer the one eatin all that meat!" Mammon exclaimed. Bewildered, you shot him a look conveying as such.
"How the hell would I eat 2 whole pounds of meat every single day genius?" You retorted.
"We just thought you were hungry." Beel offered.
"I'm a human. I'd literally die if I ate that much meat every. single. day." You enunciated the last words.
"I'm rather fascinated by Audrey II. How did you come to meet? Was she always this size? Did she always have a deep carnivorous craving?" Satan asked consecutively. Before you had a chance to answer any of them though, he continued, "Actually, now that I think about it, it makes sense! I've been an utter idiot! All the signs were there, and I've read about these kind of plants in A Complete Guide to Carnivorous Plants and How to Care for Them!"
You didn't even bother reminding him that you were the one who recommended the book to him.
Belphegor seemed to be the most chill (although you could still see some semblance of surprise on his sleepy visage).
Figuring that this was probably going to take a while, and you had a whole bunch of Dark Roses to prepare, you invited everyone to grab a chair and sit while you worked.
It turned out to be a good choice, because you ended up finishing a few hours after you'd originally thought you'd finish, and by the end of the day, Audrey had made (official) friends with each of the brothers. In fact, you would say that Audrey and Asmo got along particularly well.
And yes, the roses turned out spectacularly, and the House of Lords were reminded once again of who was truly in charge.
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Author's Note: I took some liberty with the Reader's personality in this fic. Seymour's a very timid guy, and (spoiler alert), that's what ultimately lead to his demise (in my opinion). Being thrust into a world full of demons, I think you're gonna need a little more tenacity that Seymour, so I made the Reader timid, but not Seymour-level timid (if that makes sense). The second thing I took a decent amount of liberty with is making Audrey II not entirely evil. She is after all a villain in the original story, but I made Audrey a little bit like Cleopatra. (Sorry if that's not what you wanted)! Masterlist
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