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sylvie-writes · 3 years

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So Confused

word count: 1433

pairing: dad!steve rogers x wife!reader x sarah rogers

summary: steve and sarah get you a gift yet your husband is a bit confused as to what it is.

a/n: this is a birthday gift to myself hehe. i meant to get this out earlier but life happened lol.

please excuse mistakes this was written on mobile. the writing is very straight forward because i am tireddd.

For days on end Steve had been on mission. Not one for the Avengers, but rather for personal reasons per se. He was on the hunt for the perfect birthday gift for you. In the past he had always had no trouble but that was during the honeymoon phase and felt it was about time to step up his game, ever since your daughter had been born, that is. This year he has absolutely no clue what to get, but luckily he could enlist the help of his mini me who had the perfect gift in mind.

The two of them had snuck out this morning while you were still sleeping. Unfortunately they had to wait until the day of your birthday to get your gift because in the past you’ve had a knack for unintentionally finding the hidden presents.

“Are you sure this is it, little doll?” Steve and Sarah were standing in the middle of the home appliance store looking thoroughly confused by a cardboard box. The man’s hands were on his hips while his daughter mimicked the action.

“I’m sure, Daddy!” Sarah went to go wrap her arms around the large box since it was at her level, but it was heavier than she had intended it to be and instead looked up to her dad for help. He easily scooped it up as if it were a piece of paper.

“Well, if you are sure this is it, what is it for?” In one hand Steve held the white and green cardboard box and rested it against his waist while the other hand held Sarah’s hand to keep her close. As they walked to the checkout line, Steve’s eyes scanned over the big bold letters on the box that read “Roomba.”

“Silly Daddy! It’s a rowbot vacooooom.” The smaller blonde giggled at her dad’s confused face and he moved his gaze to look down at her with a goofy smile.

“Next!” The cashier called them next in line and Sarah broke away from her dad to run up to the lady and greeted her while Steve followed suit.

Mumbling under his breath he picked up his pace, “Wow, times really are changing.”

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMY!” Two lovely voices awoke you and a little girl jumped on the bed to snuggle up as a larger man sat beside you on the edge.

You greeted them both in return with a kiss to their cheeks before Sarah was readily sitting criss cross in your lap. Her tiny hand gave you a white envelope that had been colored in almost every color crayon you can imagine. In the child’s best handwriting, written in squiggly letters was your name along with a disproportionate heart that made you giggle. It was the kind of artwork that a parent valued because it was their child’s and not since it looked like Davinci’s art, heavens knew it was anything but that.

Opening the card made your heart melt as you read the wording in the card, ones in Steve’s expert cursive but Sarah’s own words. Steve’s handwriting was so elegant and old fashioned. You loved when he wrote anything for you, whether that be a note telling the dishes were clean or a letter he sent when off for work.

A tiny tear pricked at the corner of your eye for Sarah’s letter was so sweet and endearing, especially for such a young girl. You couldn’t have gotten a better kid. With much love, you pulled her into your arms and pressed messy kisses that tossed up her hair and made her laugh.

Next, Steve crawled into the bed a bit more when you scooted over for him. He handed you his own card that was, in fact, a letter written on fancy cream stationery with gold foil. It accented the jet black ink of the pen and the smooth strokes that came from Steve’s penmanship.

In his letter were words of appreciation to you for being the loving woman, wife and mother you were. You could tell it was straight from his heart. Steve was always so genuine and you loved him ever so for that.

Not even a second after you put the letter down and pecked Steve’s lips was Sarah excitedly clapping her hands.

“Momma! We got you a present!”

You cocked your head like an intrigued puppy.

“Oh really? What did you get, baby?”

She shook her head, “That’s not how it works, silly goose! Daddy has to get the gift and then you can open it!” Her words didn’t hold any malice or demand, just lots of excitement for giving a gift, that she knew was perfect, to her mom.

Steve quickly got up and returned in no time to your bedroom and placed a huge box wrapped in unicorn paper (Sarah’s doing) in your lap as your daughter had moved to the side.

She watched with much interest as you opened the paper slowly and your jaw dropped when you saw the box. Sarah was relieved to see your reaction.

Inside your box, it was a robot vacuum, something you had been dying to get as there was just not enough time to clean the house by yourself. Even with Steve and Sarah’s help, it was a constant struggle and this little device would help quite a bit.

You let out an excited squeal yourself, something that Sarah often did, and you launched yourself at Steve who was now standing at the bedside.

“Oh Steve! Thank you! I love you so much, I will literally have your babies. You surely know a way into my heart.” A million kisses were placed on his lips and he shook his head before you continued to shower him in affection. Actually, Steve was struggling really hard to not laugh and get the words of truth out.

“It wasn’t all me, sweetheart. It was really your daughter!”

You turned to your daughter and goofily ran over to her with open arms. Scooping her up off the bed you sound around with her in your arms.

Setting down Sarah, you returned back to Steve.

“You must think I’m so crazy, getting excited over a vacuum. God, I’m getting so old.” You made a sound of disgust towards the end and Steve laughed.

“If anyone in this house is old, it’s me. (Y/n) I don’t even know what this thing really does.” Steve widened his eyes for extra effect and you were shocked that he didn’t know. After all, he worked with technology far more advanced than this yet a cell phone could stomp him. He was such an old man and you never stopped teasing him about it. You were relentless with your jokes but Steve enjoyed them nonetheless.

“Oh, well, it’s a vacuum that goes around the house on its own. Y’a know so we don’t have to spend an hour every day doing it ourselves.”

He opened his mouth in awe while you both watched Sarah unpack the box.

“Ma would love this. I remember how bad she wanted a vacuum, just a simple one cost more than our grocery spendings.”

You intently listened to Steve’s short story of how his father had saved up to get his mom a vacuum for her birthday and you smiled at the irony of the recollection. Here their son was, doing almost the same thing for his own wife.

“Times have changed so much, darling, and I’m so glad I have you here to help,” Steve unwrapped his arm from your waist and instead turned to place his hands on your face.

“You are always so patient with me, I just love you so much.” With that, your husband kissed you slowly and for what seemed like minutes. That was until Sarah started to noisily take the styrofoam from that box that you both pulled away and turned to her.

She was awfully excited over the vacuum herself and you found it hilarious. Sarah caught you both glancing at her and waved you over to help with the styrofoam that was crumbling and looking like snow on the bedspread. No one wants to do laundry, let alone on their birthday so you both rushed over to prevent the mess from growing.

After setting up the device, you taught Steve how to work the vacuum from his cell phone, Sarah scrambled through a list of names and you found loads of entertainment in both of them. They were quite the pair and you were so glad to have them in your life, especially on your birthday

#steve rogers #chris evans #steve rogers x reader #dad steve rogers x reader

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littledraga · 3 years

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Messenger Roomba

It had been a quiet day at the manor, for once. Something everyone had been trying to make the most of it. Especially The Spine, as he sat in his room, pouring over a new song. Lyrics had been bouncing around in his head for a while now. He just had to make them make sense.

While he was working away, scribbling in a notepad, a Roomba slipped into his room. Without doors, it wasn’t uncommon, and he hardly gave them a thought. At least until they bumped into his leg and beeped.

He glanced down and raised an eyebrow. There was a piece of paper stuck to their head.

Strange, he thought as he picked up the folded paper to read what was inside. Likely someone had just missed a trash can, but it wouldn’t hurt to look.

Hastily scribbled on one side in glittering ink, it simply read: ‘Hi Spine!’ and was signed with a large R.

Spine sighed and gently pinched the bridge of his nose. Really? He thought to himself. Sitting up a little, he pinged Rabbit over the wifi. “You can just ping me if you want to talk, Rabbit. You know that.”

Nothing.

Another sigh and he put the paper down on the desk. Rabbit and her weird ideas. There were easier ways to talk if she had something to say. It wasn’t like their rooms were that far apart either if she really needed him.

Intent on throwing away the note and getting back to work, Spine noticed the Roomba still sitting there, waiting.

“Oh, fine! But only because it’s you,” he told them as he turned the paper over. In a neat manuscript, he wrote back: ‘Hello, Rabbit.’ And signed it with an S. Putting it back on the Roomba, he smiled at their excited beep as they zoomed away.

A messenger Roomba, not the weirdest thing in the manor. Not even the oddest Roomba. Rollie had finally learned to roll without their training wheels. It was a proud moment for Spine. If this one wanted to pass along notes, he supposed it didn’t really hurt.

Hopefully, that would keep Rabbit busy for a while, and he could get back to work. He wanted to, at least, get the idea written out before turning in for the night.

He at least had a few moments of peace before Roomba came rolling in again and beeping to get his attention. Another note was placed carefully on their top. Picking it up, he opened it up to read it.

‘Whatcha doin’?’ was scribbled on it with the same glittering ink. He didn’t have any expectations that it would be important if she was sending notes via Roomba, but she could have at least put some effort into it, honestly!

All the same, he turned it over again. ‘I’m working on a new song.’ Maybe that would give him some peace.

That was a short lived hope as another note came in shortly after. This was probably the worst way they could be communicating right now. But he humoured her and read the next note.

‘Me too! I’m stuck on the chorus. How many ‘La’s are too many?’

He groaned and put his head in his hand. If she wanted to talk about music like this, they’d be there all night. It wasn’t worth the effort. Instead of answering, he wrote back. ‘Rabbit, this conversation would go a lot faster if you just pinged me over the wifi.’

Less time between visits this time. Rabbit had sent her lyrics over with a few question marks on top.

This was easier at least. Relenting, he went over her song, jotting down notes in the margins, and corrected some spelling mistakes. Honestly, for a bot with built in internet access, why did she misspell so many words? Once he thought he had caught everything he could mention or help with, he sent it back with the Roomba who beeped happily along.

He at least got more time to work on his own song while she read through his notes. It was good to know she at least took his advice seriously, even if she rarely took him seriously any other time.

A simple ‘Thanks’ and a doodle of Rabbit giving a peace sign was all she sent.

He supposed it was polite to thank him, but, ‘Rabbit, the Roombas have work to do.’ He tried to remind her as he sent the Roomba off to, hopefully, get some work of their own done. And maybe, just maybe, he could finish his too.

Or she would just ignore when he reminded her of things she didn’t want to do. But this time, it was a bit longer.

'Isn’t this neat! It’s like sending secret messages! Like before everyone else got on wifi!’

Ah. Now he understood where these notes were coming from.

There had been a time when they were the only ones that could connect wirelessly, at least within the manor walls. Rabbit must have missed it. Now that Spine was thinking about it, he did too. They had told each other jokes and comforted each other when they couldn’t speak.

Sometimes it made the lonely nights in the labs easier. When they were too far away to talk with each other, or when they were too nervous to power down. They could at least talk and feel like they were still in the same room. It reminded him that he wasn’t really ever alone, even if they couldn’t be together.

Now with cellphones and tablets, everyone was buzzing around. A constant drone they had to block out to get some peace. They didn’t talk as freely as they used to.

Grinning a bit to himself, he wrote back. Opting to be just a little cheeky, he didn’t have to be serious all the time. ‘Just be careful they aren’t intercepted.’

Work all but forgotten, he waited for the next note to come.

He didn’t have to wait long.

‘Nah! This one is faster than GG, I checked.’ Along with the note, Rabbit had doodled GG sitting down and pouting.

The Spine couldn’t help but laugh, hard, when he saw it. GG must have been upset to lose. And likely hated that she wasn’t in the know.

‘Good! Then maybe we can get some peace for once.’

‘So! What song are you working on Spine-o!’

Right, he had been working. Looking the paper over, he hummed softly. He could explain it to her. Or he could just send it to her with the help of the Roomba.

Beeping happily, they scooted off down the hall and to his sister’s room. In the distance, he could hear GG yell for them to come to her. He laughed.

When he got his notepad back, it was covered in little hearts in different colours.

He smiled as he looked it over and sat it back down. Along with his music, there was another note.

‘Did you get dumped again?’

Steam rushed through his vents as he heated up. ‘No!’ He hastily scribbled back and sent it back. He hadn’t had a date to get dumped by, but that was hardly the point. Rude!

He was still pouting when the Roomba came back again.

‘We’ve got a real nice blender that just came in the other day, I could introduce you.’

Chuckling, he shook his head while he put the note on his desk to respond.

‘No thanks, Rabbit. We don’t have the same tastes in appliances.’ Still chuckling to himself, he sent the Roomba off. They spent the rest of the evening talking before he gave up on his song and laid down for the night. It was nice to just talk for a while.

In the middle of the night, the Roomba rolled in again, gently bumping into his bed frame.

Groaning softly, Spine rubbed his face before blindly reaching for the Roomba and the note. He didn’t mind the notes, but they needed time to recharge and rest. If it was an early morning pun, he was going to ignore her.

It wasn’t a pun. There were no words at all, just a poor doodle of a sad face. It took his brain a moment to warm up enough to understand what that meant.

It was a bad night again. She hadn’t had one of those in ages. Or maybe, it had just been ages since she had let anyone know. That was concerning, she should know she could always come to him if something was wrong. Rabbit may have been the oldest, but he was the support of the manor.

Sitting up, he tried to wake up enough to go check on her. Only, she hadn’t come when she knew she could. He tried to ping her over the wifi, only to be greeted with silence. So, that’s how it was.

Padding over to his desk, he turned on the desk lamp and pulled out a piece of paper. ‘It’s all right, Rabbit. I’m here whenever you need me,’ he reminded her and sent the note off.

He leaned back in his chair while he waited. Time seemed to drag on forever while he sat there, minutes ticking by too slowly for his liking.

Eventually, the Roomba did wheel their way back to him. He hardly waited for them to stop before grabbing the note.

‘I know. It’s just hard talkin’ about it. Ya know?’

He smiled softly. Yeah, he understood that just fine. If she didn’t want to talk about it, that was just fine.

‘It’s okay, you don’t have to.’ Spine couldn’t draw like his sister, but he doodled a little guitar with musical notes floating around it.

On the really bad nights, they sang together or made up silly stories to distract each other from what was bothering them. It wasn’t the same as connecting to each other, but they talked through the night, changing lyrics in songs to be silly and making jokes until light started to filter into The Spine’s window. He hadn’t even noticed how late it was.

‘How are you feeling?’

‘A lot better, thanks.’

It was a relief. Spine knew he couldn’t make everything go away. Things were never that simple, even when your brain’s composed of wires.

‘I’m glad.’ He doodled his own face with a thumbs up. Or well, as close as he could manage on his own.

When there came no reply, he worried a little. She probably just fell asleep, likely had none at all.

Putting away his pen, Spine looked to his bed. There was time to get some more sleep, at least, but he thought better of it. It wasn’t like he needed a full night's sleep. He wasn’t human after all.

Putting on a fresh suit, he was adjusting his fedora when the Roomba finally came back. Kneeling down, he gave them a pat. “Thanks for all the help, buddy. I really appreciate it.”

Instead of a note, it was a picture. The two of them were sitting at the duck pond and laughing. He could get a hint.

Getting a fresh piece of paper, he carefully sat the picture on his desk to keep.

‘I’ll see you soon, Rabbit. Don’t forget the feed, you remember last time, don’t you?’

Having a messenger Roomba was nice, but nothing beat talking face to face.

#spg #fanfic

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ashintheairlikesnow · 4 years

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Kauri and Keira

CW: Implied/referenced noncon/serious dubcon, implied/referenced abuse

He slides out of the bed when the world is quiet, when Owen’s breathing is deep and heavy. He doesn’t weigh that much, really, so it’s easy to shift his body slowly, back and back, without disturbing anyone.

The sheets are soft as silk against his skin - he’s so lucky he lives somewhere with such a good bed, some owners make their boys sleep in the boxes they came in. He pulls on the black jogger sweatpants and matching sweatshirt Owen brought home last week - how lucky, so lucky that his owner lets him wear such comfortable, soft things - and he’s so quiet, and moves so slowly, that his collar doesn’t even clink against itself.

He places each step carefully, but he doesn’t really have to. This place - condo, but he’ll forget that in a second - is new, top of the line Owen says. Owen is always saying how nice this place is, how good it is that he gets to live here.

They used to not allow pets, but they make an exception for nonproductive, Owen had bragged to him once, the two of them bundled on the couch to watch movies. There are movies the booklet suggests they not watch - a short list - but Owen doesn’t seem to care.

He likes when Kauri is scared, and he can hold him and make him feel better, pet through his hair and whisper that he’ll never let Kauri get cut up like the person on TV. He’ll never let him bleed like that. All the ways that Owen hurts him don’t really count as hurt, not compared to those other owners, the other pets.

It could have been so much worse.

Owen’s touch is safe, is the only safe place, the only safe thing.

645898, what do you say?

T-Touch is safe. Their touch is s-s, is safe, whoev-ever they are.

Look at him, he’s still buzzing, don’t you think?

All their nerves buzz after a jolt like that. He’ll be fucked up all day now.

Yeah, well, at least yours reacts. Mine just stares at me now.

Stop overusing your baton and he wouldn’t.

He earned it, cheeky fuck. Again, 645898.

Touch is s-safe. I want to be tuh-… touched. W-Want to be. It’s s-safe. The owner’s touch is s-s-safe.

See? Was that so fuckin’ hard? Your owner’s touch is safe, right? Say it again.

Oh-Owner’s touch is s-s-safe. Soh-horry, my voice won’t-

Yeah, don’t fuck up next time. 645898, lights out.

The lights are out as he creeps through the bedroom door, closes it silently behind him. The only sound is the low whirr of the nearly-soundless appliances in the kitchen, and Kauri smiles to himself, fingertips trailing the weird stone countertops that Owen was so proud of, had spent so much money on.

Clean enough to eat off of, and sometimes he made Kauri do just that.

In the dark, Kauri is a little nervous, but it’s not so bad. Everything has a place and stays there except for Kauri, really, and Owen doesn’t mind that he walks around at night as long as he doesn’t wake him up. Kauri doesn’t need much sleep - how long has it been, 645898, three days? - and as long as he’s back in bed before Owen wakes up, so he can be right there, it’s okay, Owen doesn’t mind.

A lot of owners don’t let their pets roam at night.

Kauri is so lucky.

“So fucking lucky,” He sneers, and feels a thrill of fear up his spine, but no one hears him. No one else is here but Owen, and Owen won’t wake up until his third alarm goes off, even though Kauri is usually up before the first

Out into the living room, where the cool floor turns to a soft carpet under his bare feet. He finds her just where he thought she’d be, in her docking station underneath the couch, beeping contentedly in the darkness.

“Keira,” Kauri whispers. “Keira, are you up?”

Hello Kauri, the Roomba replies in its slightly digital female voice. Owen had asked for the Roomba to have a female voice - you got to pick, he told Kauri, who had only nodded silently like he understood. Time: 3:15 AM. Cleaning routine commences?

“No, not yet. You might wake him up if you get stuck again. Can you come out of your station and sit with me?”

The Roomba is silent for a moment, then whirs out of the docking station on its tiny wheels, a perfect flat black circle with two blinking red spots on the top, like eyes. Kauri smiles, a little, and pats it on the shiny part on top, where he imagines she likes it. The whirr of her little wheels changes, and it sounds like a purr. Affirmed command. Kauri directs.

“I don’t direct anything,” Kauri says softly, and when he moves back across the room Keira follows at his heels, moving effortlessly over the carpet, bumping into him a couple of times in what he pretends is affection.

The doors to the balcony don’t squeak or creak - Kauri is careful to keep the hinges nice and oiled, although he’s not sure how he knows to oil them, because he can’t remember every being taught. Kauri opens them up and lets the cooler night air in, taking a deep breath. It smells like the trees with white flowers down below, along the walkway, where he has never been.

He knows it smells like the tree-flowers, because Owen told him so.

Owen tells him all about these things, and he is so nice compared to other owners, who don’t tell their pets anything at all. Owen is very careful to be ethical and humane, and he never leaves bruises.

But there are other ways to hurt someone.

Commence balcony? Keira asks, whirring at the edge of the doorframe. Kauri assist. Kauri assist. Kauri assist-

“Yeah, I got you, girl, hold on.” Kauri drops into a crouch, picking the Roomba up carefully by the middle part where her circle is widest. The wheels keep spinning as he holds her and moves out onto the balcony, but when he sets her down again she moves over to a corner by one of the big planters - this one has some kind of miniature tree in it, surrounded by flowers that Kauri carefully waters and gives plant food at Owen’s direction - and settles in, beeping her happy little contented noise. “There, that’s better. Go ahead, we’ll be outside for a little bit, okay?”

Gratitude. Grateful. Kauri is good. Keira balcony commence.

Kauri beams at the praise, and settles into one of the thick padded outside chairs, pulling his knees up to his chest. “Thanks, Keira. I just thought maybe I could look up tonight, and you could come out with me.”

Kauri is good. Keira grateful.

“Kauri is grateful, too,” Kauri replies, but really he isn’t. Owen is very kind to him - he’s so fortunate to have someone buy him who is so kind - but he can’t be as grateful as he’s supposed to be.

He looks up at the dark night sky, clear as glass that he can look up into and see the stars. The condo practices minimized light pollution, Owen tells him. It’s far enough from the city to avoid more than a hint of the reddish orange glow of those lights, off in the distance Here, the condo is surrounded by old trees allowed to keep growing and carefully managed. There is no one but the condo people for miles and miles and miles.

There are no lights at night between midnight and 5 AM. Instead, over Kauri’s head, the sky is a riot of white pinpricks he used to know the names for, and doesn’t remember anymore.

He sits quietly, looking up at them, letting them wash over him. All their designs turn into pictures if you connect the little dots, the sense that there is something so big out there and he is only the smallest, tiniest part of it, and so it doesn’t matter if he is hurt, because there are bigger hurts out there, and he is only dust on a planet orbiting a distant sun-

645898, what do you remember?

Kauri’s fingertips start to tap on the arm of the outside chair, nervously.

I-I-… I don’t know, it hurts, please stop, please-

Tap. tap.

No. I asked you a question. What do you remember?

Taaaaap. Tap. tap.

Taaaap. Taaaap. Taaap.

Taaaaap. Tap.

Tap.

Taaap. Taaaaap. Taaaap. Taaaap.

Tap.

Taaaaaaap.

N-Nothing! I don’t remember anything! I don’t remember, I’m sorry, I don’t know-… I don’t know anything!

Good. Get 645898 back to his Cubicle.

Keira beeps once, and he thinks she might sound worried, but he keeps his eyes up on the stars, and he lets his heart beat faster.

Tap. Taaaaap. Taaaaap.

Tap. Taaaaaap.

Taaaaap. Tap.

Taaaaap.

Pick up the pen.

N-No! I don’t want to do this! I don’t want this!

Pick. Up. The. Pen.

I don’t want-… Stop! Stop hurting me!

Kauri’s breathing has gone shallow, stutter-skipping breaths that make Keira beep again and he shakes his head at her. It’s only safe to think at night, when Owen is sleeping. Owen didn’t buy him to think, Owen bought him to be pretty, to have blue eyes and black hair. Owen paid a lot of money, Kauri is an investment, and he’s lucky he’s worth so much money or he could have been sold to someone worse.

“L-Lucky,” Kauri whispers, but his voice shakes.

Taaaaaap.

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap.

“I’m lucky.”

Tap. Tap.

Kauri heartbeat accelerating, Keira says, and her robotic voice drops a little, a mockery of the kind of concerned whisper Kauri sometimes uses with her. Kauri physical condition deteriorating?

“No, I’m f-fine,” Kauri says softly. “I’m fine, Keira, thank you. Thank you. Just, just give me a second. I’m okay. I just need-”

I need him to not be touching me right now.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

He remembers stars, before. Lying on his back on a blanket in the grass, with Keira beside him, only it was a different Keira, then, and he was a different person. They had a book with constellations in it and they were pointing out all of the different ones, laughing like idiots.

645898, unacceptable incorrect thought aberration.

No, please, I didn’t mean to, I didn’t mean-

Unacceptable. Come here.

N-No! Please, please don’t do it, please-

Then learn to fucking forget when we tell you to, 645898. Dumbass

Please, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I-… I-…

“I’m so lucky,” Kauri whispers. “I’m so lucky that I’m not in the facility anymore. I need to not go back to the facility. I need to not go back. I need to not-”

There’s a beep and small thump, and Kauri looks down to see Keira bumping the leg of the outside chair, scooting back, and then bumping again. Kauri reassurance require. ‘I don’t want this’. Keira provides. Reassurance Kauri. Keira provides. Kauri assist? Kauri assist. Kauri assist-

He unfolds his legs and leans down, sweeping Keira up into his arms, holding her rigid little metal body with the wheels spinning, although they settle and stop once he has her on his lap, his hands resting on the smooth curved plastic and metal shape. Her little red lights look right up into his eyes. She whirrs, softly.

Kauri reassurance require, Keira intones, and Kauri tightens his hands on her, just a little bit. Keira provides. Keira reassurance provide. Acceptable?

“Yes,” Kauri replies, and then he holds her up in his arms, vertical, hugs the rigid, unforgiving metal and plastic to his chest. “Kauri reassurance requires.”

645898, say it again.

Touch is safe, touch is s-s-safe, touch is-

“I’m so lucky,” Kauri says, voice soft and sweet. “I’m so lucky I have you. I’m so lucky I signed the contract. I’m so lucky I have Mr. Owen. I’m so lucky, I’m so lucky, I’m so lucky.”

Keira understands. Reassurance Keira provide. ‘I don’t want this’, Keira beeps, and Kauri holds her tighter. Kauri heartbeat elevated. Keira reassurance. ‘I don’t want this’.

“Me neither,” He whispers. “But I’m so, so lucky.”

Tagging @pepperonyscience who asked to be tagged but I’m pretty sure someone else did and I can’t remember who they were! Aaaahh! I’m sorry. If you want to be tagged for Kauri updates, please leave a comment on this and I’ll make an actual honest-to-God list I can keep track of

#whump #isolation #isolated whumpee #whumpee #conditioning #brainwashing #tw: implied/referenced noncon #box boy #box boy cinematic universe #Kauri #Owen Grant #Erase to Control #tw: implied abuse #intimate whumper #creepy whumper #whumpees r us universe #conditioned #brainwashed #Captivity

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me-and-my-gaster · 6 years

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ESSY!

Ok, so... I am so glad I got to know you, @messedupessy , you fucking sunshine from up north, you amazing crocs flavored icicle queen, my ultimate doom when it comes to going down with ships, my bestest frozen neighbor of them all. To honor the day of your börth and to show how happy I am to have you in my life, here. Have the thing I wrote.

It’s on AO3 too now, because ye.

Two

Stretch stopped pushing the big cardboard box on the floor and straightened himself with a tired groan. He heard his joints pop and for a moment wished his brother was around to scold him for making those inappropriate sounds. Being alone in his brand new solo apartment meant there was no loud berating incoming, but the lanky skeleton smiled at the thought anyway.

He shuffled towards the kitchen, feeling it was the time for a very well deserved break and a snack. Despite his low-effort way of living, he had spent a whole day moving his things from the house he shared with Berry - something that astounded even him. Stretch was sure he was going to laze around the boxes and postpone unpacking them for months from now. He had a reputation to uphold.

There wasn’t much in the kitchen yet but he remembered he managed to snatch a bag of toast bread on his last trip to the small mall around the corner. The skeleton decided this was an appropriate reward for all the heavy lifting and being a proper adult he did.

Not really feeling like unpacking the toaster and plugging it in, Stretch resorted to simply putting a thick layer of butter and honey on a few slices. Just as he was wondering whether to bother and search for some plates he heard a soft creak behind him.

Glancing over his shoulder, Stretch saw a familiar blue hoodie right at the door sill. Immediately, he smiled at his skeleton friend and turned around to face him. His lazy grin faltered a little when he saw the weary expression on Sans’ face.

“You look tired.”, he said in a matter-of-fact tone as he looked over the smaller skeleton’s slumped frame with a worried attention.

The other skeleton was wearing his usual, non-work attire consisting of a blue hoodie, dark loose pants and, of course, pink slippers. Whatever it was that made him look so not-well at least allowed him to be comfortable.

“Maybe...”, Sans shrugged as he muttered that. “There was a skele-ton of work today. Had to stop or Paps would start searchin’ for the real me.”, he chuckled half-heartedly at his own joke.

Stretch nodded with a small smile. “Tell me ‘bout it. My bro was close to callin’ an exorcist on me too. Heh.”

The small skeleton seemed reluctant to enter the kitchen, with one of his feet still firmly on the living room floor. Stretch wasn’t surprised at that at all - it would probably take time for him to get used to the new apartment too. Every room in here still needed a lot of work (or lazying around) before it feels more... his. More like home.

“Wanna eat?”, Stretch looked at the toast sandwich in his hand and motioned at the other skeleton with it, breadcrumbs falling on the floor.

For a moment, Sans looked like he wanted to decline but that seemingly simple gesture was all he needed to shuffle towards the tall stools in the middle of the room. He sat at the table, his feet dangling over the floor and slippers threatening to fall.

It wasn’t the first time for one of them appeared in the other’s kitchen for a late evening snack, so Stretch knew that his friend would accept whatever he was preparing at that time. He continued spreading butter and honey on the toasts after he took a few more slices from the bag.

His movements were lazy but deliberate, even when he brushed the crumbs on the floor with a nonchalant swipe of his hoodie’s sleeve. Living alone meant there was nobody to chide him for being a disaster when it comes to cleaning, but this time he wanted to check whether the roomba he got from Berry would take care of that. This was connected to the whole moving out ordeal too, along with the name his cool brother chose for the vacuum cleaner - Dustin Bieber. Everything to make the process easier, so it seemed.

He noticed that Sans was very quiet, even for being just tired. That, of course, meant there was something more going on with him, as Stretch had learned over the time he had known his best friend. That never was a good sign but there was also the fact that the other skeleton deliberately chose to come here despite clearly being not his usual chill self.

“Is something wrong?”, the lanky skeleton risked asking this question while lowering his tone into a much softer one. He knew that could scare Sans away but at the same time, being straightforward and honest when something was not right was his trademark. And his friend knew that very well.

The other skeleton looked at him, his eye lights a little dimmer than a while ago, and shrugged as he made a grumbling sound that answered the question better than any sentence could. Right after that, his gaze slid away and to the floor. The small hand lying on the counter curled into a loose fist with just the index finger tapping gently on the hard surface.

It was one of those days.

He decided that his friend can feel down in his brand new kitchen but only on a full stomach. Even if he literally didn’t have one.

“Seems like you need to get back to loafing around a little. Start with this.”, the lanky skeleton set a stack of toasts next to Sans.

That at least managed to force a weak chuckle from the small skeleton, who inched closer to the lazy sandwiches and started nibbling on the crust in an unenthused manner. Stretch followed suit as he sat right next to the other, his elbow close enough to nudge the ribs hidden underneath the blue hoodie.

They ate mostly in silence. There were a few attempts at joking and small-talk but it worked only half of the time, so they both dropped it. When the toasts disappeared and only a handful of breadcrumbs was littering the table as the only proof they actually ate something, Stretch scooted his chair a little closer to his friend.

The other skeleton huffed lowly and without moving away, he folded his arms in front of him before hiding his face in his elbow. Stretch didn’t say anything, feeling nothing but neverending patience for his friend’s mood and a small flicker of warmth that Sans didn’t try to hide from him under the facade of a chill guy.

“I... dunno... just... I just... it’s...”, the small skeleton mumbled without raising his head. He made a very vague and overall helpless gesture with his hand before he let it fall back onto the table with a clank. “You know...?”

A gentle smile tugged on Stretch’s ever-grinning teeth as he casually draped his arm around Sans and pulled him a little closer.

“Yeah, I know.”, he says in a soothing tone. “I know.”

It didn’t take much more for Sans to lift his head up and lean on the taller skeleton’s chest. Stretch tightened his embrace and instinctively slid his hand under the hood just to start rubbing small circles right between the hunched shoulder blades.

With a small huff, the other melted under that comforting touch and closed his tired eye sockets. Stretch leaned closer to press his cheekbone to his friend’s skull and looked around the kitchen filled with unpacked boxes.

For some reason, this room already started to feel like home.

#my writing #honeyketchup #underswap papyrus #sans #fluff #comfort #a little hint of sads #happy birthday!#drabble #that's how it's called?

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stephicness · 7 years

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PROTOCOL (Chapter 2) -- Android AU! (Ravus Nox Fleuret x Reader)

Haha, wow, I can make that title really long!

But hey! Finally moved along to part two! :D Didn’t quite introduce another important character yet, but you’ll get to meet two of them within the next chapter! Thanks for being so patient with me when I’ve been writing this. I hope to keep writing this for you more when it comes to this story!

For now, enjoy Chapter 2 of PROTOCOL! C:

Previous Chapters: CHAPTER ONE

Ringing, knocking, a chipper ‘Yoo-hoo!’ in the late morning were among the many distractions you usually blocked out of your hearing when you were focused on your repairs. As the schedule dictated, from 8 AM to about noon, you would dedicate yourself solely to doing repairs on the androids you were commissioned to repair. Noon until 1 PM was lunch, and then you were back doing repairs or mods until one of your nightly primetime dramas started.

Today was The Cor Aegis, which was one with a Cor-X model repurposed for the sci-fi action show. You had to find out if the evil prince Loqi was going to exact his revenge on the hero or rejecting his proposal to be his wife! Odd show, but you liked it.

Even so, work had to come first. Even if you just wanted to binge watch the show in your underwear again as you waited for the next episode. No amount of knocking, ringing, shouting, or greetings could disrupt you. Especially when this Roomba wasn’t going to fix itself!

You reached over with your foot, pushing open the door from the garage entrance with it and shouting into the house as loud as you could. “RAVUS, GET THE DOOR!” You caught the door again with your foot and gently shut it as you focused again.

“Ya know, it’s been real nice havin’ Rae around here with us.” Cindy held up the mechanical arm she was working on, sticking her fingers into the connection port with her eyes flickering slightly. From just the small shock she gave it, the arm began to twitch its fingers, provoking a loud ‘Aha!’ from her. “Been nice not ta be able to focus.”

“Mhm… Could use more focus though…” You carefully pulled some of the wires from the small vacuum device. You just had to make sure that the wires got back into place, and the device should be able to move again. Just some wires that got jumbled up when your client’s dog decided that it was a giant frisbee… That didn’t fly in the air. You just sort of assumed that the dog wasn’t the smartest creature in the world, unfortunately. “Just let me stick these back in, and you’ll be able to walk again, little guy.”

With your small set of pliers, you pulled the wire aside, looking for where to reconnect it. And when you found the place, you moved the wire to connect it slowly… Carefully…

And SLAM!

You jolted from the loud noise, arms shooting up as reflect and the wire you wanted to connect pulling itself out with you. You stared at the wire for a split second before you heard the little device beginning to beep rapidly. Just before you could look down at it, the device bolted forward and into your torso before it clattered to the floor. “Son of a-!” You coughed a bit in pain before you looked down at the stupid Roomba on the floor. Well… It was moving along like it hadn’t been damaged to begin with. Just scooting along as if brand new. Your eyes narrowed at the little thing. This was the thanks that you got for trying to fix it? Asshole.

“What the heck was that?” You looked over to Cindy, who seemed more fascinated by the arm that she was tampering with than the noise you had heard. You let out a sigh, shaking your head in response. Well, at least she can get some more work done while you got investigate. Tossing your pliers onto your desk, you pushed your safety glasses up into your hair and went inside the house.

Needless to say, the man you asked to check on the door was standing there by the window nearby the front door. The way he stood there, eyes narrowed as if glaring at something intense was outside. He honestly reminded you of a cat with how often Ravus was perched at the window. If you gave him a pedestal to perch on, he probably would use it, you were sure. You squinted at the window for a moment before you cleared your throat.

No movement or response from Ravus.

Of course… When he was focused he didn’t answer you either. You seemed to have a knack for attracting androids who like to ignore you.

“Ravus?” The silver-haired man’s eyes shot over to you. Always with such an intense stare, it gave you the shivers every time. But it was always calmed down with how his expression softened whenever he noticed it was you. Well, at least he was getting used to seeing you. And getting used to not roasting your microwave. So seeing how he calmed himself, you smiled at him, even if you were shrouding a bit of annoyance from having been interrupted by work. “Was there someone at the door?”

“Yes, but I have rid them from your presence.”

You blinked rapidly and tilted your head at him. “I’m sorry, you did what?”

Ravus tilted his head at you in return. “I simply took the most appropriate course of action to combat a potentially threatening scenario. With how aggressive your neighbor was trying to assault your door, I assumed that something was wrong and would endanger you as a result.”

“Yeah, but why?”

“To ensure your safety and well-being. I simple said that should they continue their persistence in knocking, I will not hesitate to eliminate them on sight as a means of self-defense.”

“So then you slammed the door on them?”

“Correction: I told him that they were being a nuance. And then I slammed the door on them.”

“What?! Ravus, no!”

You had to rub your temples in frustration. Such conversations like these seemed to be more of a daily occurrence the longer you had the RAV-N0X prototype residing with you. As far as you can tell, it wasn’t even an official month since you repaired him, and already he seemed to be making things rather antagonistic for you in your household. From constantly replacing kitchen appliances to training the android just how to be civil of all things, it was like taking care of a dog. An overly-protective dog with a knack for making things worse than they already are.

You could deal with replacing toasters and all (especially with the discounts you get after helping to fix-up the SOPH-E Air android that usually helps run the appliance store). But you couldn’t necessarily deal with not even being able to brush your teeth without your android roommate doing something over-the-top to ‘ensure your safety and well-being.’ Your neighbor hardly deserved that. At least, you hoped they didn’t… Ravus hardly did anything to help you and your sudden paranoia about people that come to ring your doorbell.

You let out a heavy sigh. “I’m going to have to chase them down now… Did they at least say why they were here?”

“It was something along the lines of needing an audience with you about an important matter.”

“Then you should have let them in!”

“Not without verifying an appointment with me.”

“I’m pretty sure they don’t even know you’re living here!”

“Contrary, my visual recordings note that they assumed that I am an attendant of your home, referring to me as, quote: ‘Like, a boyfriend or something.’”

You were taken aback and caught off guard. Really? How could they not tell that Ravus wasn’t a human? He had a metallic purple arm for goodness sakes! But you let out a deep breath to calm down the annoyance, cheeks reddening a bit as you glanced aside. Cute though that they thought Ravus was your boyfriend. If he was human, you would kill to date someone that handsome.

“Upon further analysis of your neighbor, however, I have come to the assumption that they are – according to Urban Dictionary – a gossipy bitch.”

And this… Was probably why you wouldn’t want to date a guy like Ravus if a human version of him existed… He said some rude things. You shook your head out and moved past the android with a huff. “Gossipy bitch or not, my neighbors could also be potential clients, you know. And at this rate, I kind of need them if I wanna keep living here.” You stuffed your feet into your boots, stomping yourself into them while you took your jacket up from the wall. You opened up the front door, staring at the towering android as you gestured with your arm. “Well? Let’s go.”

“Why would I need to accompany you? As you mentioned before, your neighbors supposedly do not know I reside here.”

“You made it your point that they do know. Besides, you need to apologize to them.”

“I do not see a reason to when I was merely following protocol.”

“Well, I do! Humans don’t give people death threats for knocking on doors.”

“The knock itself was approximately 3.2 times more forceful than it should have been, indicating urgency or violence within it.”

“Well, I’ll never know if they were being violent or urgent now that you sent them away.” You let out a sigh of exasperation, clearly not getting anywhere with Ravus. You shook your head before you turned back towards the door. “You can’t predict everything bad that’s gonna happen, you know. I could get attacked as soon as I leave the house, and you wouldn’t be able to stop it.”

You were barely able to finish your thought before Ravus quickly stepped up to you, the violet replacement arm of his quickly shooting out to block you from the doorway as he stood in front of you protectively. His eyes flashed with a brief violet before fading out – just as the light on your porch surged bright then shattered itself. You jolted in surprise, instinctively gripping onto Ravus’s arm before you groaned and pushed it away. “Ravus, what the hell?!”

“If your neighbor is truly a threat, then your life may be in danger.”

“If anything, you’re going to end up scaring me to death before anything dangerous happens to me!”

“Actually, in a statistical sense-“

“It’s a figure of speech, Ravus.” At this rate, Ravus would keep you from even so much leaving the house to get your mail. And with how urgent your neighbor sounded, you had to do something to get the android to budge. Even using his name command, it was still spotty about whether he listened to you or not. It made you begin to wonder if his virtual intelligence was acting up or he was just installed with a really opinionated one. You’d have to do research on it later.

You pressed your lips together in thought. Research can come later. What mattered now was getting Ravus to move so you can see your neighbor. So you thought for a moment, a longer moment, and an even longer one before you realized that, holy Astral hell. Ravus was not budging. Even amongst the awkward silence, he just stood there, still like a barricade as you stood behind him. Really? Was there really something out there that was that dangerous? No. The most danger that you’ve had in your neighborhood was when Ravus came barreling through your window. You couldn’t help but turn around and eye the tacky green rug the covered-up the remains of black in your carpet. Yup… That was the only dangerous thing.

But you’ve had enough of this. You’d leave the house one way or another, and you’d make Ravus to apologize to your neighbor one way or another. You reached out, placing your hand on top of Ravus’s arm to get his attention. As expected, his mismatched eyes locked themselves onto you as you stared back at him. You wouldn’t take no for an answer as you began to take his hand into your own and firmly grasp it. He looked down at it, attempting to shake his hand free, but you still held on. “No. You’re going to apologize to my neighbor, whether you want to or not. That’s an order from me. Do I make myself clear, Ravus?”

This seemed to trigger something in Ravus, his eyes both flashing with a blue color as his furrowed eyebrows eased and his expression softened. It seemed that triggered his command code. You just had to be adamant with him, it seemed. But even after he registered the command, his expression turned into a grumpy frown before he turned his head away. “Understood…” He didn’t make much of an effort to fight off your hold anymore, perhaps worried about whether he would harm you as a result, but you still took what little victories you could get as you began to lead him out of your house and across the street to your neighbor’s house.

Your neighbor’s home was much nicer looking in comparison to your own, but perhaps it was because the lawn was neatly trimmed, rose bushes around the walkway gave the house a lot of life, and… Well, there wasn’t a sheet covering their window as you still tried to find someone to replace your window. It seemed proper, especially for someone living alone. It made you a little envious, considering that you couldn’t get Cindy to do the yardwork even if it was the only function her VI understood. She would much rather take apart the lawnmower rather than use it.

Maybe you can command Ravus to fix the yard. You made a mental note of that for later.

But once you got up to the front door, you let go of Ravus’s hand, looking up at him as you fixed up the sad excuse for clothing you had put him in. The old man in the house behind you was nice enough to lend you some of his old clothing from his ‘young and wild days’ to give to Ravus, but they definitely weren’t Ravus’s style. You were pretty sure floral dress shirts and brightly colored bell-bottoms weren’t even in style anymore, but they were something other than the torn-up white thing that Ravus was found in. You’d have to make a note to find him better clothes. If you could leave the house for more than five minutes without something going wrong, that is.

“Okay, so remember to be nice. You don’t have to smile when you apologize, but at least try to be sincere.”

Eyebrows furrowed in response. “How does one be sincere? Sincerity implies as if I have the capacity of caring about an apology.”

“Ravus.”

He let out a sigh in response, eyes flashing blue for a split second before he nodded. “I understand. I have conducted research, and will attempt to be ‘sincere.’”

“Thank you, Ravus. It won’t take us that long. Promise.” You pat down his collar before you rang the doorbell, stepping back next to Ravus, eying him from your peripheral vision just in case he tried to make a break for it.

You could hear a small bit of commotion from the other side of the door. Noises that seemed muffled, but audible enough to be heard as ‘A visitor! Gotta get the door!’ Exuberant in their greetings, from the sounds of it. The door jimmied itself a bit before it swung open and a bright smile greeted you. Blond-hair curled up and spiked like waves of gold that made you jealous of how healthy it looked, blue eyes staring at the two of you in awe and excitement, freckles that sparkled just like the young man’s eyes… There was something quite captivating about the young man than opened the door.

“Visitors! Welcome!”

Wait a second…

You opened your mouth to respond, but Ravus stepped forward already. “There is something that I must do before you welcome us.” He was a behemoth in comparison to the blond in the doorway, but not for long as he knelt before the young man, taking his hand into his own two as he looked up with a gentleness in his eyes.

“I wish to apologize to you… For my outburst against you and for the fear I incited within you. It was heartless of me to reject you without a second thought, and for that I wish for your forgiveness. I promise to never let you feel shut out by me – to feel as if you have to handle your endeavors alone.” He squeezed the other man’s hand tighter, bringing it to his lips before he kissed the back of it with a chaste kiss. “You may not wish to accept my apology, but please know that I am sorry, from the bottom of my heart.”

Silence was given in response to Ravus’s words.

“…Why are you not saying anything?” Ravus’s eyebrows furrowed before he turned to look up at you. “Why is he not responding? Why are you concealing your face with your hands?”

You croaked out a groan in response. “Because that’s not my neighbor.”

Ravus paused, eyes flashing violet for a split second as he looked up at the blond. He seemed to analyze the young man before him longer than anticipated to come to the realization that perhaps this wasn’t your neighbor. But both were blond, right? Both had blue eyes? Both were skinny and freckled? He always saw this young man retrieving the newspaper from the driveway, collect the mail from the box, return home with an arm full of groceries and other items. He was certain this was your neighbor.

…Right?

#stephic writings #fanfiction #protocol #long fic #final fantasy xv #ffxv #ravus nox fleuret #ravus x reader #reader #android au #i forgot how to tag stuff #but hey!#android au stuff again #whoop!#that subtle corqi reference though #because yes #why not?

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hastybooks · 7 years

Note

so i've just been through your weber/josi ficlet tag and have been missing them greatly - any chance you have the time/desire to write them again?? maybe along the lines of any of those times josi took a big hit and weber came out of nowhere to avenge him? maybe a little h/c, worried shea in the locker room after the game??

I’ve done this before, dear anon, if you want to take a look?

Now let’s pretend the NHL is more fun than it is and the Canada Cup format is actually… interesting. Mix up North Americans with the “rest of the world” and see which so-called GM can build a team first! And of course… someone remembers the beautiful hockey Shea and Roman played once…

Roman sees the hit coming, braces himself for #5, Team Lombardi, charging towards his side, a blur of red-and-white at the corner of his eye and manages to slide the puck off his stick before his face hits the glass with a judder.

He blinks, blood leaking from his mouth from a cut his mouthguard made, and gets told to skate off towards the tunnel by a ref. #5 gets 2 for boarding, and Roman spits blood out onto the ice. He’s never liked the taste of blood, curses himself for not going back to get his mouthguard molded better–

The trainer shines a light in his eyes, asks him a few questions. Roman’s not in a hurry to get out there. This is a meaningless pre-season game without even cool hardware to get out of it. The TV hanging in the corner of the ready room is supposed to show the game.

It shows Shea whaling on #5 instead, his face snarling as he wrestles him down to the ice, the refs hovering like awkward roombas. Roman swallows, seeing blood leak from Shea’s gnarled knuckles as he pushes #5 up against the glass and says something to him that makes him jerk his head back against the glass. Shea snarls his entire way to the box and a game misconduct, a small cut opening up above his eyebrow and a wild look in his eyes.

Roman flicks his eyes over at the game clock in the corner of the screen. At least Shea timed it with 5 minutes in the third period to go, and Team Poile is up by 3. He settles back against the examination table, feeling just as fluttery as he used to when Shea would get mean with anyone who gave him a hard time.

Nice to know some things don’t change, right down to Shea bursting into the examination room and asking Roman if he’s ok, his eyes more frantic than his voice. Roman smirks, rakes his hand over his hair, “Yeah, but I wonder if #5 is even functional.”

Shea blushes. He clears his throat, “Well. Some things you don’t do,” and they look at each other. Roman grins, scooting closer to Shea, “Didn’t stop you from spearing me in the groin in Montreal–”

“That was a hockey move,” Shea says. Roman rolls his eyes. Shea Weber gets away with the nastiest shit because he’s so. Canadian, and the only reason Roman isn’t complaining is because of that one time they were walked onto in the massage room in Nashville, Shea balls deep in him and lying his beard off by insisting it was a massage.

Shea clears his throat, scrubs his rough chin, “Did you pass baseline?”

“Yes, Weber,” Roman says. Shea shifts on his feet, and Roman adds, “I thought you were going to break my hotel bed tonight.”

Shea sniffs, “Not without a doctor’s note,” and Roman snorts, scrapping his thumb over the cut on Shea’s forehead, “I don’t go around jamming my hands into sub-par goons, for one. Just take me back to the hotel and fuck me like you’ve been wanting to since you saw my name on the roster.”

That makes Shea raise his eyebrow, maybe looks a little jealous of the other guys Roman’s been fucking, but Roman knows he wouldn’t let that Gallagher hang around him without a lot of cock-sucking in exchange. They’re even. Shea nods, and Roman kisses the corner of his jaw, right where his scruff is thickest, “Missed you, babe.”

The pleased look Shea gives him is better than any dumb award this Canada Cup can give him.

#ask and you shall recieve #ficlet #darth/josi #shea/josi

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littledraga · 4 years

Text

Robots and a Roomba

Because thanks to the Cav SPG really needs their own little Roomba.

Six stepped into the old manor with a box under his arm. He would grin, but well, keyhole masks aren’t all that good for that. His mom told him that he needed to help more around the house and suggested a vacuum. In a manor of countless rooms and spaces, before doing science. But he wasn’t going to disobey Annie either.

So! He had the most wonderful idea! And had gone out to buy a Roomba for the place. Now, no one had to worry about vacuuming. Patting the box he giggled. He was a very smart man indeed!

Unboxing the Roomba and setting it up, he sent his little machine away with a pat. “Thank you, Roomba!” he giggled. “Work hard!” And with that, he was off to science!

Rabbit was polishing her crown of awesome when she heard a distressed beeping. But not one that she knew.

Polish and crown in hand, she went off to investigate. Down the hall, the beeping got louder until she found a robot disk, stuck under the hall table.

“H-h-hey, there! Whatcha-cha doin’ under der?” Pulling out the machine, she looked it over. “Oh! You’re ne-new, ain'tcha! I’m Rabbit!”

When they didn’t respond, she frowned a moment. But she quickly beamed. “Aw! Ya must be shy. It’s okay, we’re all really nice, promise!” Still nothing. Maybe they just needed to feel more welcome.

“Come on! Let’s go have some fun to-together. Do-do you like tea parties?” She asked while she carried the Roomba off for a play date.

Turns out Roombas aren’t big fans of tea, even if she let them wear her crown of awesome. But they loved cookies! Or at least the crumbs that fell out of Rabbit’s faceplate from chewing.

“See? I knew ya just needed to warm up to me” She chirped and brushed out her dress. “Come on, we can have some more fun.”

Standing up quickly, she bumped the table and sent the cutlery clattering to the floor, and covering her new friend.

The Roomba kicked on again and chased after Rabbit as crumbs tumbled from her dress. A knife and fork balancing on its top.

“H-hey, careful,” she warned, and jumped out of the way, only for them to turn around again. Watching them, she grinned widely. “Well, if ya wa-wanna play like that.”

Plucking up her new friend, she went off to find some better knives and tape.

Sometime later, Spine was interrupted by a soft whirring noise and looked up from his guitar. “Hm? I thought I heard,” he was cut off when he heard a small clang of metal on metal.

Looking down, he saw a Roomba with a couple of knives taped to its top. Worse, they had cut his pants. “Hey, now! There’s no reason to go around cutting up people’s clothing,” he chided as the Roomba seemed to flee.

Only to start beeping as it hit the wall, cutting up the wallpaper.

The Spine sighed and knelt down to pick up the Roomba, careful not to have it cut any more of his clothes. Sure, the knives wouldn’t hurt him, but why ruin perfectly good clothes? It’s not like he had an endless supply of black shirts.

“Don’t worry, buckaroo. I’ll get you cleaned up and back on your way.” Carefully, peeling off the tape, he put the knives on the side table. “That’s better! Back at it, you go,” he praised and put the Roomba back down.

It turned once, twice, and then into his leg again, beeping that it hit something.

Grinning, he bent down to pat the machine again. “Hey, it’s alright if you want to take a little break. The manor is pretty big after all.” Sitting back down, he picked up his guitar again to practice. Though, he found himself distracted while the Roomba circled his chair. He hadn’t made any messes, not lately anyway.

“Do you like music by chance?” He asked and strummed a few notes. When the Roomba stopped in front of him, he grinned. “How about that!” He played a few songs for his new friend before he dug out an old cowboy doll he had stored away. Borrowing the hat, he placed it on the Roomba and adjusted it until it was just right.

“There ya are! Looks good on ya cowboy,” he laughed as the Roomba finally left the room.

Red fire truck in hand, Zer0 was happily playing on the floor when a new friend came to visit. Looking up, he grinned. “Hi! I’m Zer0. Are you new?”

Instead of answering, the Roomba went around the edges of the room.

Which made Zer0 laugh. “Come on! Do you wanna play with my red fire truck, with me? You can be the cowboy firefighter!” He followed the Roomba around the room with the truck. “Where’s the fire cowboy?”

After pulling him out from under his bed, Zer0 grinned. “You’re havin’ a hard time seein’ where you’re goin’, cowboy firefighter! I can fix that.”

Digging through a couple drawers, he found a marker and held it up. “Perfect! You can’t see where you’re goin’ ‘cuz you ain’t got no eyes!” Sitting down he carefully drew two mismatched eyes for the Roomba, and the biggest smile he could fit.

“Now, you can see the fire! Where should we go now?” With a chirp, the Roomba spun around again. Zer0 mimicked his new friend spinning in circles.

Out of the room, they went, until the Roomba ducked under a table that Zer0 couldn’t fit under. “Hey! You can’t put out the fire without the fire truck!”

Getting up, Zer0 scurried off to meet the Roomba on the other side. “Cowboy firefighter?” He wandered the halls looking for his new friend.

GG was sat on the end of the hall, pouting. “Someone pick me up! I’m too cute to walk down the halls!” She whined, waiting for someone to find her. The poor Roomba did first.

Seeing the Roomba roll down the hall she lit up. “Oh! Perfect!” Giggling she knocked off the hat and crawled on top of it.

Trying to keep her balance was hard, she fell on her face. “Hey! What was that for!?” She whined, sitting up to rub her nose.

Trying again, she wiggled and flailed until she found out how to sit and stay upright. “Yes! A mobile throne! Just need some cushions. Come, throne! To the living room!” She was pretty sure they were going the wrong way, but as long as they got there!

The Spine and Rabbit were in the kitchen, debating the new song set when GG rode by.

“Cowboy?” The Spine tilted his head before he popped his head out to see.

Rabbit wrinkled her nose. “No! That was Mister Stabby! I was playin’ with him earlier.” She rushed out to chase after GG. “What’d you do with his knives, GG?” She demanded.

“Knives? That was you? Rabbit, are you insane? You could have hurt someone, never mind cutting up my pants!” He scolded, only getting more angry when she waved it off.

“It was his idea! He was zoo-zoomin’ around with a knife on his head. I just helped.”

“Hey, guys! Have you seen Cowboy Firefighter? We were playing firefighter with my red fire truck and he got lost.” He held it up a little as he talked.

Narrowing his eyes, The Spine huffed and grabbed at the toy. “You mean you were playing with my red fire truck,” he corrected. “You have your own fire truck Zer0, leave mine alone.”

“He pr-pro-probably ran away because you were callin’ him the wrong name. He’s Mister Stabby!” Chirped Rabbit.

The three of them couldn’t finish a sentence before another was trying to talk over them.

Hearing the noise, Six peeked his head around the corner to see GG riding on his new Roomba. Stepping out, he put his foot out to stop it and crossed his arms over his chest.

“Do you mind, Petes? I need to get to the living room to get pillows for my mobile throne.”

Six tilted his head. “Excuse me? That’s a Roomba. It cleans the floors.” Before GG could whine he jabbed a thumb to the side. “Off.”

While she scampered off, complaining that he was being mean he looked down the hall to the three squabbling bots. He could see the marker face. He had only bought it a few hours ago! “Excuse me.” He tried, picking up the machine and powering it off.

When they ignored him he tapped his foot and huffed. “Excuse me!” He tried again, not quite yelling. That worked and they looked at him, each crying out that he turned off, Mister Stabby, Cowboy, Cowboy Firefighter. Tilting his head again he sighed.

“It’s a Roomba, little machine vacuum. It runs around and cleans the floors. It is not a toy, and it’s not sentient. The Roomba is not for playing, leave it alone.”

The three bots hung their heads and agreed.

How could three bots, each over a hundred years old, make him feel guilty? Sighing, he waved a hand. “It’s got a lot of work to do, please let it work.” Still, with the Roomba tucked under his arm, he walked off to put it on its charger. They were a handful sometimes.

A few days later, Six came up for a coffee refill, wondering why he hadn’t put one in all the labs yet. Stirring in more creamer than coffee he heard something metallic rattling along. He stopped and made sure he hadn’t picked up loose screws and dropped them in his glass again.

Nope, something was still rattling. Walking out to the hall he followed the sound. A few turns later he found it. The Roomba was scooting down the hall with three ice creams on top. There were a few bills tucked under them.

“GUYS!”

#spg #fanfic #roomba

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