#why is jonas sitting alone?
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He's so ‼
#nico hischier#devils#offseason2023#get that sponsorship money babe#why is jonas sitting alone?#who arranged the seating chart?#i love his sponsorship posts#i wonder who was forced to take the pictured#also that chocolate selfie#i can't deal with him#no perder#timo meier#jonas siegenthaler
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my hero ii || lucy bronze x teen!reader ||
lucy begins to make it up to you.
lucy felt awful. it was obvious to everybody just how guilty lucy was feeling after blowing up at you. the team had all sided with you one way or another reminding lucy that she owed it to you to fix this. she knew that she had to, even if the team wasn't breathing down her neck to do something quickly.
you had genuinely been a very positive person in lucy's life. she had never really paid much direct attention to you, but she had noticed a lot of the things you had done to impress her. lucy wished that she could take her behavior back and coddle you, but she hadn't wanted to egg the girls on about your crush or accidentally send you the wrong message.
going too far in the other direction hadn't been the right move though. you should have been elated to have lucy's attention after trying so hard for so long in vain, but you didn't want it. you didn't want it in the gym when she asked you to spot her. you didn't want it at practice when she picked you for her team. you didn't even want it whenever you had gone down in a game against seville.
"oh my god, i'm so sorry," the player who had knocked into you apologized profusely. that didn't matter as lucy shoved her away, taking your hand in hers as she knelt down next to you.
"get away from me, bronze," you said through grit teeth. you had been on the verge of tears, but you held it in once you noticed lucy's presence near you. her words had rattled you to your core, and you wouldn't be able to put them past you for a long time. that was why, despite how nice lucy's comfort was, you tried your hardest to push yourself away from it.
"i know that i haven't earned it yet, but don't push me away. don't try to handle this yourself, it never works, trust me," lucy said. she sat herself right next to you and wrapped her arm around your shoulders. it was awkward, and for the first time in a while, lucy realized that you were physically a lot bigger than her. "i'm not going to ask you what hurts because enough people are about to do that. where did you get that bracelet?"
"vicky and i made them at alexia's when everybody else went to the club. ingrid and mapi have the ones that i made them," you told her. lucy smiled as her distraction seemed to be working. she kept talking to you while the medics moved you onto a stretcher. "ingrid is going to come on for you. i know that you don't want me back there, so ona and alexia are going with you."
"thanks bronze," you said as formally as you could. you were taken completely off, both ona and alexia following you back. the tears flowed freely in their company, but neither woman mentioned it.
"i noticed that you and lucy were talking for a while," ona said hopefully. you knew what she wanted to hear, but a quick shake of your head put those hopes to rest. "pequena, i am not telling you to do anything, but please consider giving lucy another chance."
"i can't ona. i look at her and all i can hear are those stupid words that she said to me. every move i make is affected by them," you told her. it was tough to admit that you were still struggling with overcoming the insults that lucy had hurled your way. she had been your hero once, and you couldn't imagine doing that to anybody who you knew looked up to you. "i don't want to talk about this anymore, not with you or anybody else."
"understood. ona, will you bring this to jona please," alexia said. she handed the envelope with the medical team's official diagnosis after your scans and tests. ona nodded and walked away, leaving you all alone with alexia.
"that meant you too," you grumbled as alexia moved to stand in front of you. she placed her hands on your shoulders, forcing you to sit still and face her.
"i won't make you talk about how lucy made you feel right now. i want to know how you feel about your injury. it's your first one, and you're really starting off strong," alexia said. there was a bit of a teasing lilt to her voice, one that helped you to relax. you would have been going crazy thinking about being out as long as you were supposed to be for the dislocated hip.
"i feel like i'm one wrong move away from the nursing home," you joked. alexia smiled as she pulled you in for a hug. somehow, she knew the joke was a deflection. unfortuantely for you, you couldn't stop the tears once they had begun. you let out a lot more than you meant to as you clung to alexia. "can i still sit in at practice?"
"of course you can, we'd all miss you too much otherwise."
…
lucy tweaks her knee at the very next practice. you can tell that she had done something to it before that by the look most of the other girls give her. the curiosity is killing you, so you hobble your way down to the physio rooms while lucy is stuck icing her knee.
"both of us know that you can take a hit like that and run it off. what did you do on the team's night out?" you carefully lowered yourself into a chair. it was close enough to maintain a conversation with lucy, but far away enough that you didn't feel trapped.
"i can't tell you that, no way," lucy said. you furrowed your eyebrows as you stared at her. it was something that you had learned from alexia, but unfortunately for you, despite your intimidating size, lucy just saw you as a little kid. "you're the team baby, ona and alexia would kill me. it's nothing personal."
"i am not a baby!" you raised your voice at lucy as your stare grew a little bit more intense.
"you're right, and i am sorry for saying that (y/n). i'm sorry for ignoring you because of a few stupid jokes, and i am so sorry for yelling at you like that. c-can i explain myself?" lucy asked you.
"if you tell me what you did first." lucy huffed as she adjusted herself on the medical bench.
"fine, i tweaked my knee in bed with ona. she saw something and wanted to try it. remember to always stretch before any physical activity, not that you'll be doing any of that any time soon," lucy said. you could hear the jovial tone of her warning, which was the only reason you didn't get onto her for babying you.
"gross, now you can explain yourself." you had let out a little gag, one that made both of you chuckle a bit.
"i got scared when we collided. it was my fault, and i didn't expect you to be so solid. i though that i had really hurt myself for a moment, and every bit of frustration came bubbling up. my knees, they've been getting worse and worse."
"yeah, i've noticed," you muttered under your breath. "is it going to happen with my hips since i've dislocated them so young?"
"if you rest and let them heal properly, it won't be nearly as bad. i've always been an impulsive shit. don't tell the team that i've told you this, but find yourself someone like keira. if it wasn't for her looking out for me, i would have had to retire by now," lucy said. she didn't like to admit her faults, but lucy had never been good at resting. she didn't want to see you in the kind of pain that she felt some days, it broke her heart to think that she had even caused you any pain in the first place.
"can i trust you to keep a secret?" you asked. lucy nodded, sitting forward for a bit of gossip. "there is a girl, we met at national camp for the u-17s. she, uh, she plays for athletico madrid's b-team."
"do you want me to get out of your hair so that you can call her?" lucy offered. you shook your head, already having texted her. "does anybody else know?"
"no, my parents have been taking me to see her," you said shyly. you had wanted to tell many of the girls on the team, but for some reason, you went straight to lucy. you definitely weren't ready to completely forgive her, but you did notice a change in the way that she was treating you.
…
your first game back saw you put in a position that you'd never tried before, right back. lucy was benched after a knee surgery, and at first, you had been terrified about taking her spot. you had nearly begged someone else to ask for it instead, but jona and the rest of the team believed that it was perfect for you.
"this game will be a bit rough, vale?" alexia was even more nervous for your comeback than you were. el classico matches were rough, and you were fresh off of a pretty bad injury. still, you were prepared for this. those girls weren't going to know what hit them as they came your way.
"trust me, they're more likely to hurt themselves than her," lucy said as she put her arm around your shoulders. you were about to send her a glare when you stopped yourself. the two of you had gotten a lot closer working on your recoveries together. lucy had learned the things that you had wanted from her in the first place. she was happy to give praise where it was deserved.
"yeah ale, i've been hitting the gym," you said with a dramatic flex of your arms. alexia smacked the back of your head, but left you alone. "guess i should get out there."
"yeah, you go out there and show that madrid crowd the future best rightback in the world," lucy said. she ruffled your hair a little and shoved you away.
you left your heart and soul out there on the pitch. madrid didn't have a lot of opportunities, especially ocne they realized that they couldn't just barrel through the new player. you had a lot of help from your backline, and a very protective alexia who nearly got herself thrown out of the game. all in all, you were more than happy with your debut in your new position, even if a part of you wished that lucy had been next to you on the field.
"come on, you've got an interview." claudia tugged you away excitedly. you stumbled a little as you were led in front of a camera. rapid questions were shot at you about the game, and you struggled to keep up. your brain was exhausted, but you kept going because that was what you had to do.
"you said once that you grew up a soccer fan. who was your biggest influence?" you glanced into the stands as the interviewer asked their question. your eyes met lucy's as she talked with some of the real madrid b team girls, obviously trying to scope out your girlfriend. you chuckled to yourself at the knowledge that she'd come back without her answer. those girls were going to keep your secret no matter what.
"lucy bronze. my mother was a good english woman and took me to the lioness games when she could. i have been lucky enough to practice with my hero, and i hope that we can play together soon. things were not always easy, but i am the best version of myself because of her help." you felt good about your answer, not thinking about how many of your teammates would see it. you didn't have to think about it much until you were arriving back in barcelona after the game.
your parents had agreed on a sleepover at patri and pina's with bruna, jana, and vicky. a few of the older girls would be stopping by to hang out a little, but most likely not staying over. you were waiting for your overnight bag to be unloaded when you felt someone hug you from behind tightly.
"what the hell?" you questioned as you nearly fell over.
"you've got a way with making me feel like a real shithead. i am so sorry for ignoring you and being mean. i swear i'll never do it again, never ever," lucy promised you. you were about to make fun of her when you noticed the genuine tears in her eyes. "i am so proud of you, (y/n)."
"thank you lucy, it means a lot." you turned around in lucy's arms for a better hug. the moment was nice while it lasted, but then bruna was dragging you away while patri carried your bag for you. things felt a little chaotic with everybody talking over each other to finalize the plans, but all you cared about was getting to the sleepover to unwind a little bit.
#woso fanfics#woso x reader#woso imagine#lucy bronze imagine#lucy bronze x reader#teen reader#platonic fic
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Dumb Decisions
Happy birthday to my homie @sleekswosobession
Pairing: Barcelona Femeni x Reader (Sick fic)
Word Count: 1.1k
You cursed in your head as you were woken up by Alexia pulling your blankets off you. “Get up,” she said, grabbing your bag and throwing it on your bed to get you started. It took you a while to actually process what was going on, but all you knew was that your head hurt really bad and you felt like you were about to throw up.
You were sick. You spent the next 10 minutes questioning if you should tell Alexia or not.
You told yourself it was dumb to train and that you should tell Alexia, but there was the other part of you that didn’t care and just wanted to train.
The second part won. You were able to take medicine without Alexia noticing before you left for training, but the nausea really hit you when you walked into the locker room.
The loud conversations weren't helping with the headache. Especially with Patri blasting her music and running around poking everyone to get them excited for this very early training.
“Aw, what’s wrong?” Frido cooed and pinched your cheek when she noticed your mood. “I'm just not feeling it today." She frowned and patted your head before leaving you alone.
————
“Y/N, come here." You froze hearing Jonatans voice, quickly making your way to him. “Si?” You tried your best to make yourself look somewhat presentable, but you were barely able to stand straight at this point, just wanting to curl up on the grass and cry.
“Go see the medics,” you said, giving him an odd look. “Why? I don’t feel any discomfort.”
“You look pale; you're off your game today; even right now, you're struggling to even catch your breath. Get checked out.”
He waved you off, leaving you no room to argue back. You simply huffed and walked back to the lockers.
————
You shuffled into the room, looking in between them. They stared back at you, inspecting you to see what was wrong. “Sit,” one of them said. “She’s all yours,” the other one said, and she walked out to go back onto the field to monitor.
“Symptoms?” “I don’t feel anything,” she let out a sigh. “Do I have to get Alexia?” You looked at her, terrified. “No”
“You know, when players are sick, they usually stay home,” you heard her mutter. You scowled, “I’m not sick; just tell Jonatan I’m fine.” You were silenced by her glare.
“Do you want me to lose my job?” You quickly shook your head, thinking of any other ways to get out of this situation.
“Can I at least change out of these clothes? I feel nasty.” She just nodded, desperately wanting to get a tiny break from you.
————
There were 10 minutes left of practice, so you knew she was going to notice; you just hoped it was towards the last 5 minutes.
“Here comes trouble." Cata commented as she watched you jog back to Jona to tell him you were "fine.”.
He did look a bit worried, but he decided to just let you off and motioned for you to go on a team for a scrimmage.
You didn’t know why, but you were tired before it even started. “You haven’t done anything,” Patri commented when she noticed how you were struggling to even stand. This drew the attention of everyone.
“I need a moment," you said as you sat down, regretting even coming back on the pitch.
“You okay?” Ingrid put a hand on your back, watching as you struggled to catch your breath. "Fine,” you wheezed out.
After a couple more minutes, you finally recovered. “Why is everyone staring at me?” You whined to Ingrid, and everyone quickly went back to doing their drill. “Let's get you some water.”
“Y/N!” You froze hearing the medic, everyone watched shocked as she started sprinting towards you. “Ah shit” as much as you wanted to run away, you just didn’t have any energy left and just sat on the grass, accepting your fate.
“What is going on?!” Jona asked, frustrated; training had been interrupted way too much today, and he was sick of it. “She’s sick, and she lied to me,” Jona sighed and waved Alexia over.
“Never a moment of peace with you around,” Alexia muttered, dragging you off the pitch. You made sure to stick your tongue out at the medic.
————
“Sit down,” Alexia said sternly, for once you actually listened to her. “What are you feeling?” You were about to speak until she cut you off. “And be honest, no lies,” you rubbed your nose.
“I’m not feeling good,” you admitted, and you watched as Irene entered the room again. Alexia held back a sarcastic comment, looking at her. Irene took that as a sign to take over and gently pushed Ale away to cool down.
“Okay, let's do this quickly so we can get you home.'' You rubbed your eyes and nodded at her words. You watched as everyone entered the locker room again and took the water from Salma.
“This is probably the dumbest thing you’ve done." You glared at Salma and watched as Patri and Pina laughed at you. “Alexia, tell them to leave me alone.”
One look from Alexia, and they quickly went back to doing whatever they were before.
————
Alexia was jealous watching as you listened to everything Irene told you to do. You even took the medicine without complaining.
“Now all you need is rest; you’ll be better soon." Irene reassured you as she brushed your hair.
"Gracias, Irene, you should get home to your family; I can take it from here." All Ale got was a look. “Please don’t go all captain on her, not until she fully feels better.”
“That’s difficult for her,” you whispered, and with one last hug, Irene was out the door. Now it was just you and Alexia.
“You're an idiot." You looked upset by that statement, making Alexia regret it. “Movie?” “My choice?” “You always choose.” That was true; no matter how many times Alexia told you she was going to choose the movie, it always ended up with you choosing.
————
“You need to tell me when you're sick, Bebe." You tested your head on Alexia’s shoulder as you scrolled through to find a good movie.
“Needed to train." “No, the number one thing you need to worry about is your health.”
“Yes Ale” She wrapped a blanket over you and focused on the movie you chose.
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chocolate chip cookies (alessia russo x depressed!reader)
when you quit the team, feeling lost, no one knows what to do, including you. you spend days curled up in bed, alone, until you meet alessia, your replacement, who brings you out of your shell and helps you find yourself again.
warnings: depression is a big topic in this one! no mention of s/h or suicidal thoughts, just overall depression. if you're feeling depressed, don't hesitate to reach out.
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When you tell the team that you’re quitting, the room goes silent. Then someone bursts out laughing. You’re not sure who, you’re staring at the ground, not wanting to look into the faces of your now former teammates. They think it’s a joke. It’s only when you turn around and leave without another word that they realise you’re being serious.
And you are. You've already spoken to Jonas - he tried to convince you to stay, but you’d made up your mind. He told you that whilst he couldn’t guarantee there would always be a spot for you on the team, there’d always be a spot for you at the club. You nodded, thanking him quietly. You won’t be going back, you know that, but it seems unnecessary to make this harder for everyone else.
You don’t go back to the training ground after you tell everyone. You’ve already packed all your things in your car, wanting to make your departure quick and easy. On the drive home, your phone keeps buzzing with messages and calls from your former teammates. When you’re at a red light, you turn your phone off.
You decided to leave a while ago. You’ve lost any passion for the game, and when you realised that you were just going through the movements, you decided it would be best for the team if you left. You were dead weight, taking up a spot that could be used by someone else. Someone better. Someone who cares.
When you get home, you leave everything in the car, even your phone. You go inside and go straight to your room, getting into bed. you’re just so tired. It doesn’t take long for you to fall asleep, feeling slightly more peaceful now that you don’t have the prospect of quitting looming ahead.
You wake up to the sound of someone banging on your front door. Most of the day has passed, it’s getting dark outside. You lie there for a minute, waiting to see if the banging will stop, but it just gets more insistent. You sigh, dragging yourself out of bed and to the front door. When it opens, you see the faces of your teammates. Beth, Viv, Leah, Kim, Katie. The core five. They ask what’s going on, say that they’ve been trying to call you and message you all day. You walk past them to your car, get your phone out, shrug.
“I left my phone in the car,” you say. You watch them exchange glances.
Still, you don’t want to be a bad host. Or a bad friend - if they still consider you a friend. You decide that it’s understandable if they don’t. You invite them in, and they pile onto your sofa. Leah pulls a stool in front of the sofa, telling you to sit down. You sit. Five faces stare at you, expressions ranging from confused to worried to something like anger.
You didn’t mean to make anyone angry.
“What’s going on?” Kim asks, her captain voice on.
You shrug.
“Why would you quit?” Katie asks, frowning.
I’m not good enough, I'm bringing the team down, I don’t care about playing, the team deserves better, you all deserve better, runs through your head.
You shrug.
“Y/n, is something going on?” Viv asks, her voice gentle.
I’m tired, I don’t want to do this anymore, I just want to sleep, I wish I didn’t exist, life would be easier if I didn’t exist, I don’t understand why any of you are here, why do you care about me, I don’t care about me, I’m not worth caring about.
You shrug, then shake your head.
“I just don’t want to play anymore,” you finally say. You’re not sure if it’s the truth or not. You loved playing, once. You loved the feeling that you got when you were on the pitch, the way it made everything else melt away. But you haven’t had that feeling in a while. When you’re on the pitch, the voice telling you you’re not good enough follows you.
Your former teammates frown. They’re not convinced, and honestly, neither are you. You say that you’re tired, you want to sleep. They get the hint and leave, but not before each hugging you tightly, telling you to call them if you need anything. Beth and Viv promise to bring Myle around at the weekend, and Leah says she’ll come and see you tomorrow.
They keep it up for a few weeks, but the season is starting, and you know they’re busy. You spend your days at home, curled up in bed, cocooned in a blanket. You watch tv and scroll on your phone for hours. You order the food shopping to be delivered so you don’t even have to leave the house. Someone usually visits you on their day off, and the girls message you. You go over to Beth and Viv’s place, cuddle the dogs, watch tv there instead of in bed at home. It's okay. You’re fine. You don’t feel any better, really, but it’s fine.
It starts when you’re forced to go to a movie night. Leah promises it’s just a small group of the girls, she knows you don’t want to be faced with the whole team. She tells you that there’s one new girl there, the new signing, but that she’s really nice. On the day, you think about ways to get out of it - surely Leah can’t just force you to go?
She can and she does. She shows up at your house, tells you that she will pick you up and put you in the car if she has to. You crack a smile at the image. It’s the first time you’ve smiled in a while. Leah notices.
The movie night is at hers. She's picked you up early, and when you get back to her place she sets you to work, chopping fruits and veggies for a snack board. The doorbell rings, the first person arriving. You expect it to be maybe Beth and Viv, who are usually pretty punctual, but it’s the new girl. Alessia. You've seen her in person a couple of times, when the team played against Manchester United last season, but you were already feeling out of it and hadn’t paid much attention to her then.
She comes in, hugs Leah and smiles at you. You smile back. She asks if there’s anything she can do to help, and Leah directs her to some meat and cheese she’s put out that needs slicing. She's been seeing charcuterie boards on instagram a lot lately and wanted to try making one.
“You mean, you wanted to get us to make one for you,” Alessia teases, and you let out a small laugh. It surprises you, and Leah, whose mouth drops open slightly. Alessia doesn’t think twice of it - why would she, she’s never really met you before. She wouldn’t know that it’s the first time anyone has made you laugh in, well, months.
The evening goes well. It's nice to be around the girls. You don’t pay much attention to the movie, your brain feels too foggy to keep up with it. The mean voice returns, telling you that you’re just there because they feel sorry for you. You start picking at your nails.
“I like your nail polish,” Alessia leans over and says to you quietly. She’s sat next to you on the sofa.
“Oh, thanks,” you reply, taken aback. The nail polish is chipped and worn, remnants from Katie coming over and painting your nails a few weeks ago.
“It's a great colour. I like having my nails done but I'm terrible at leaving them alone. I fidget too much and I'm clumsy so I usually end up breaking at least one,” she tells you, looking at her own nails.
You nod, not saying anything. You wrack your brain, trying to think of what to say or how to act. It's been so long since you talked to anyone new that you feel like you’ve forgotten how to be normal.
“Um, you can borrow it, if you want,” you say. “The colour, I mean. I can give it to one of the girls to give to you.”
“Really? That’d be great!” she looks at you with a big smile. You feel an odd sensation in your stomach, like you’ve just had a hot drink and the warmth is trying to spread throughout your body.
You nod shyly, giving her a small smile.
After that night, she starts messaging you. The first message you write off as being about the nail polish. After all, why else would she message you? She keeps going, though. After she sends you a message thanking you for the nail polish, she mentions a book she’s reading. You’ve read it too, so you figure the polite thing to do is to ask her what she thinks of it so far. Then she asks you for recommendations. You’ve been reading a lot, lately, now that you have time. You send her a detailed list, then realise that maybe that’s too much, but you’ve sent it now. She replies with heart eyes and exclamation marks, so you think that maybe it was okay after all.
She asks if she can come over to borrow a book you’ve told her about. After a moment of hesitation, you say yes, she can come over tomorrow afternoon, if that works. You spend the rest of the day cleaning and tidying. The next morning you find a chocolate chip cookie recipe. You used to bake a lot, but you didn’t really have time for it anymore after becoming a professional footballer, and you weren’t meant to be eating that kind of thing anyway. The thought crosses your mind as you mix the ingredients that maybe Alessia won’t want any, since most of the team eat pretty healthily. You keep mixing. It’s too late now, you might as well finish making them.
You’re nervous, waiting for her to arrive. You’re not sure why, probably just because you haven’t interacted with her alone before. You’ve put some cookies out on a plate in case she wants any, and you’ve already got the book she wants to borrow lying on the table.
When the doorbell rings, it makes you jump. You open the door and she steps inside, immediately giving you a hug, then quickly stepping back.
“Sorry, is hugging okay? I need to get better at checking with people before I hug them,” she says apologetically.
“Hugging is okay,” you nod, and she grins and pulls you into a hug.
“Oh my god, it smells amazing in here!” she exclaims, looking around.
“I made chocolate chip cookies,” you explain, and brace yourself for rejection. “Do you want one?”
“Absolutely!” she says, and you try to hide the surprise on your face. You offer her the plate and she takes one. When she bites into it, she lets out a moan that has you blushing. “Holy shit, y/n, these are incredible! You really made these yourself?”
You feel that warmth pooling in your stomach again. You nod, smiling shyly.
“You should be a professional baker or something, these are so so good!” she tells you, polishing off the cookie. You can’t help but smile. There are crumbs on the corners of her mouth and a smear of chocolate on her chin.
“You’ve, um, got something,” you say, pointing to your chin. “Right there. A bit of chocolate, I think.”
“Whoops,” she blushes, wiping the chocolate away with a sheepish smile.
“Oh, I have the book you wanted,” you say, figuring that she probably has things to do.
“Trying to get rid of me so quickly?” she asks.
A pit opens up in your stomach. “No, no!” you quickly insist, but she laughs and waves you off.
“I’m just teasing,” she tells you, smiling.
You smile back, but it’s forced. It doesn’t seem like Alessia notices, though.
“You have a lot of books,” she says, eyeing the large bookshelf in your living room. “Have you always read a lot?”
“I used to, when I was little. I didn’t really have time to read as much when I joined the team,” you say, and wince at the mention of your leaving. She’s never brought up the fact that she essentially replaced you, and you don’t want her to.
“I’m guessing leaving the team has given you a lot more time for things like reading?” she asks, and you nod.
“And baking,” you add, not wanting it to seem like you’ve just been sitting at home not doing anything since you left. Even if that is the truth. She doesn’t need to know that today is the first time you’ve baked in, well, years.
“True, that one is very important!” she says, taking another cookie from the plate. “Seriously, y/n, these are amazing.”
She keeps asking you things, about yourself, about books, about your life, and you don’t realise how much time has passed until you look outside to see that it’s gotten dark. She follows your gaze out of the window and jumps up.
“Shit, I didn’t realise how late it was! I really should get going,” she says apologetically.
You hold out the plate of cookies. “Want one for the road?”
The two of you message more after that. It’s weird, how easy it is to talk to her. You chalk it up to the fact that she never met you before you left. This is the only version of you she knows. She doesn’t expect anything from you.
A couple weeks later, she asks if she can borrow another book. This time she wants you to recommend something for her, and you pore over your bookshelf for hours, trying to find the perfect book for her. Once you’ve decided on one, the next task you’re faced with is what to bake this time. She didn’t mention anything about it, but after she enjoyed your cookies so much, it feels like it’d only be right to bake something again.
This time you make pumpkin spice cupcakes with cream cheese frosting. You carefully mould little pumpkins out of marzipan to decorate the cupcakes, and you can’t help but feel a swell of pride at the look of astonishment on her face when she eats one and lets out a moan at how good it is. She keeps commenting on the little pumpkins, in awe at the fact that you made them by hand, and the warm feeling spreads throughout your body, making your fingers tingle. After she leaves, armed with a new book and two more cupcakes, you get a message from Leah, inquiring about where her cupcake is, and how come Alessia gets cupcakes but you’ve never baked anything for her, and you smile to yourself.
The days in between visits are not as good. You still spend a lot of time curled up in bed. Sometimes, you think about the future, and you usually end up falling asleep trying not to think about it, brain spiralling.
This goes on for a few months. Every couple of weeks, Alessia visits you for a new book and some new baked goods, and every time the two of you spend a little longer talking. You both avoid the topic of you leaving the team and what you’re going to do next. You have enough money in savings that it’s not something you have to worry about, for a while at least, and thinking about it makes you want to cry, or sleep, or just not exist anymore.
One day, though, Alessia is sitting on your sofa, eating a slice of lemon cake, when she asks gently, “What are you doing, y/n?”.
The question is enough to make you burst into tears, tears that you didn’t know you’d been holding in.
“I don’t- I don’t know,” you sob helplessly as she rushes to your side, pulling you into a hug.
“Well, what do you want to do?” she asks after you’ve calmed down a little.
The question makes you stop. You haven’t thought about that in forever.
“All I’ve ever wanted to do is play football,” you shrug.
“But… not anymore?” she prompts you. You can understand why she’d think that. You quit, after all.
“I don’t know. I think I do still want to play, just… not at that level. It was too much. I feel like I-” you trail off, sighing. “I feel like I lost myself. And I still don’t know where I am, or who I am. Everything just feels so hard, like it’s all so much effort, and like there’s nothing I can do to stop it all from happening, like it’s a huge wave and I’m just getting tossed around under the water, barely able to come up for air.”
She nods, not saying anything, and you feel a sudden rush of embarrassment for opening up like that.
“Sorry, I don’t know why I said all that, I-” you say, but she cuts you off.
“No, it’s okay! I asked, I want to know. And it makes sense. A friend of mine struggled with depression a lot when we were teenagers, and-”
“Wait, depression? You think I’m depressed?” you ask, confused. Alessia laughs gently, placing a hand on your shoulder.
“Oh, I’m 99% sure you’re depressed,” she says.
“Wha- I’m not depressed,” you insist, shaking your head. “It’s not like I want to hurt myself or anything.”
“Okay, but do you ever feel like it would be easier if you didn’t exist?” she asks, and you frown. “Or, like, have you lost interest in things you were previously passionate about? Do you feel tired all the time?”
“Okay,” you say, slowly. “So, maybe I’m a little depressed.”
The mean voice at the back of your mind laughs.
“What if I’m just being dramatic, though?” you ask. “Plus, I have no reason to be depressed. I have a good life, I have nothing to worry about.”
“Look, what if you go and see someone? A doctor, or a therapist?” she suggests, and your cheeks burn at the thought of burdening someone else with your problems.
“No, it’s fine, it’s not that serious,” you say, waving a hand. “There’s definitely more important stuff they have to deal with. I’m fine, seriously.”
She raises an eyebrow but drops the topic. She brings it up the next time she comes over though, and the next, and the next. You think about it a lot.You look stuff up online, look at social media accounts talking about people’s experiences, buy books dealing with the subject.
The next time she comes over, you tell her you’ve made an appointment with a therapist, and she hugs you tightly.
You start seeing each other weekly, after that. Sometimes she’ll go to yours, sometimes you’ll go to hers. She’s on a mission to help you figure out what you want, and nothing is going to stop her. She buys you baking books and equipment, goes to galleries and museums with you, watches documentaries on pretty much everything and anything the two of you can find. When you mention that you’ve been thinking about learning how to play the piano, she helps you find a teacher nearby.
Things are looking up. You still don’t know what you want to do, but you’re feeling better. Your therapist is good, and you thank your lucky stars that you’re in a position to be able to pay for private therapy.
When Alessia rings your doorbell, you don’t think anything of it. You’d planned for her to come over to watch a documentary she’d found about llamas (you weren’t sure what revelation you were going to have about your future from watching something about llamas, but who were you to deny her?). When you open the door, she’s smiling from ear to ear and holding a box.
“I have a surprise for you,” she says, closing the door behind her gently as she comes in.
She carefully sets the box down and opens it to reveal a small ginger kitten. It looks up at you with wide eyes and lets out a small meow, then puts its paws up on the edge of the box, looking out curiously.
“Alessia, what is this? Whose kitten is this?” you ask, dumbfounded.
“Yours?” she asks, smiling sheepishly.
“What do you mean, mine?”
“I mean, she’s your kitten. If you want her? Oh god, please say you want her. It’s just, you talked about having a cat when you were younger, and how much you’d like to have one again, and I figured they’re a lot lower maintenance than dogs, and-” she’s cut off by you hugging her tightly. Tears prick the corners of your eyes and you try to blink them away fiercely, still hugging Alessia.
A small mew alerts you to the kitten, who has jumped out of the box and is rubbing her head against your leg.
“I have her stuff in the car,” Alessia says, nodding towards the door. “I’ll just go get it?”
You nod, unable to look at anything but the tiny kitten now trying to clamber up your leg.
You’ve been seeing your therapist for about 6 months when Alessia asks you to be her girlfriend. It’s a couple months after she got you Dorothea - Dory for short (or Dorito, occasionally), as you’d named the ginger kitten. You’re stunned, but quickly nod yes as she starts to bite her lip, looking worried at your lack of answer. You hug her, feeling her breathe a sigh of relief against you, and when she kisses you she tastes like the chocolate chip cookies you’d made earlier that day, the same recipe as the first time she’d come over.
Your therapist has been helping you figure out what you want, now that you’re slowly regaining some of the passion you’d lost. You decide that you do still want to do something with football, just, as you’d told Alessia, not professional football. You hadn’t realised how much you’d missed having time to yourself, having other hobbies outside of your work.
You get in contact with Jonas, who puts you in contact with some other people, and before you know it you’re back at the club. Not on the team, you've made it pretty clear that that’s not what you want. Instead, you’re spending the day at the youth program. You already know by lunch time that this is what you want to do.
Before you know it, you’re settled in as a coach for the Academy. Your days consist of working with kids, young people who have the whole world ahead of them. You still have bad days sometimes, where it feels like you can’t get out of bed. On days like that Dory cuddles up next to you in bed, and Alessia holds you close. She moves in after you get the job, claiming it makes sense, since you’re always either at her place or she’s at your place anyway. She insists that she’s still very much a dog person, but you catch her asleep on the sofa one evening, with Dory curled up on her lap, and you smile.
#alessia russo#woso x reader#alessia russo x reader#alessia russo imagine#alessia russo fanfic#woso fanfics#woso#woso imagine#awfc#also i know this is a pretty 'good' image of depression#and that it's usually much messier than this#but for the sake of the fic i left it fairly 'mild'#tw: depression#hannah writes fics
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waiting room
alexia breaks up with you for reasons you don't understand. she only realizes her mistake when she thinks she's going to lose you.
You thought about it every second, for days. It didn't make sense, why Alexia had broken up with you. Her reasoning was completely unclear, she stumbled through the breakup, spewing cliches. It didn't matter though, not really. She'd broken up with you, and that was it. All you could do was focus on football, take training one day at a time. Seeing her every day, stony faced, was indescribably painful.
No one on the team really understood what had happened to the both of you, which really just made things easier. There were no sides chosen, you simply coexisted.
You pushed all thoughts of her out of your head, focusing on warm ups. It was hard; she looked so stunning in the warm up jersey, blonde hair pulled up in a tight ponytail, and you could have sworn that you kept catching her looking at you. You needed to focus though.
The game wasn't supposed to be a tough one, and it remained a boring one well into the second half. There wasn't much time left when you went down. You jumped in the air for a header, and another body had collided with you, shoulder hitting your head, sending you slamming back down to the ground. You were conscious after the first hit, but when you made contact with the ground, your head banging down with a sickening thud, everything went black.
Alexia was sprinting across the field to you before the whistle had even blown, panic coursing through her veins. She was the first one to you, somehow, collapsing onto her knees next to your limp form.
"Y/n! Can you hear me?" Alexia pleaded, hands fluttering uselessly above your body, terrified to touch you. You didn't react at the sound of her voice, not moving a muscle. You were on your side, face pressed into the grass. "Amor, please," Alexia said, not caring if people heard, not caring if you weren't together, not caring about anything except you being okay. The physios were arriving, and someone was tugging her away from you. Mariona held her back, as the midfielder stared helplessly at you.
The physios were worried, and they were never worried. You still weren't moving, and Alexia thought she was going to lose her mind. All she could do was watch.
Watch as they brought the stretcher out, the neck brace. Watch as they carefully lifted you onto it. The game was completely forgotten, the noise of the stadium reduced to static in her ears. She willed you, with everything in her, to open your eyes, to move, to do anything. You didn't, though, remaining completely motionless as they moved you off the field.
"Ale,"
She turned, belatedly realizing that Mario was talking to her.
"Do you need to go off?" she asked. She knew her captain well, and could tell that Alexia wasn't mentally on the field anymore. Her brain had gone with you, following you down the tunnel.
"What if she's not okay," Alexia replied, completely disregarding the question asked to her. At that, Mario motioned to the sidelines, and Jona nodded in understanding.
"She's gonna be fine, she's tough. Go off the field, go check on her," Alexia didn't know when Marta had arrived next to her, but there she was, tugging the captain's armband off the blonde, and gently nudging her to the sidelines.
Alexia looked lost as she walked off the field, almost dazed. She bypassed the bench completely, walking down the tunnel after you. Jana and Mapi were waiting there, Mapi on her crutches. Alexia didn't even see them, not really, mind focused only on finding you.
Jana grabbed her captain's arm softly, drawing Alexia's attention to the brunette. "They're taking her to the hospital. If we go now, we'll get there just after the ambulance," Jana told her. Alexia nodded, not saying a word, beginning to walk briskly to the parking lot. She was still in her kit, still in her boots, but she would be damned if you had to sit in the hospital alone for any amount of time.
What if you weren't okay? She'd messed everything up, ruined it all. She'd let her insecurity take over, convinced herself that she wasn't good enough for you, pushed you away despite your insistence that she was all you wanted. She'd broken up with you for nothing, and now you were.... hurt? She didn't even know. All she knew was that the last thing she'd said to you had been a monotone, half assed explanation. It had been a lie. She shouldn't have done it. She loved you, she understood that now more than she ever had. What if you weren't okay?
-----
You became aware of a steady pounding in your head. Your mouth felt dry, and your body felt stiff. Still, you were floating somewhere in between being awake and being asleep, and you could hear the machines beeping around you. Opening your eyes seemed like a monumental task, so instead, you focused on the way you felt.
You weren't quite sure what had happened. The last thing you remembered was jumping for a header, and then... nothing. Your head hurt, though, that was for sure. You tried to shift your fingers and your toes, suddenly terrified that you were paralyzed. They twitched under you, though, and you could feel the seam of the sock on your toes, and the tight grip your hand was in.
"She moved her hand," a voice said. Alexia. She sounded exhausted, terrified. She squeezed your hand, and you heard shuffling in the room.
"Amor, can you hear me?" she asked. Amor? You were pretty sure she'd broken up with you. Amusingly, this thought seemed to spur you through the last dregs of sleep, and you forced your eyes open. Alexia's face was inches from yours, and if you weren't too busy groaning in pain as the light hit your eyes, you would have been startled.
"Oh god, you're awake. Thank god. How do you feel?" Alexia spoke, a hand coming up to lightly, lightly, stroke your face.
You cleared your throat. "Didn't you dump me?" you rasped, looking at her in confusion. She let out a watery laugh that turned into a sob, before she buried her head into your abdomen, blankets muffling her cries. You looked around, bewildered at her behavior. You noticed the others in the room, then, Ingrid and Mapi, Marta and Patri, as Mapi placed a hand on Alexia's trembling back, rolling her eyes.
"She's been like this for the past 2 days," Mapi said, a wry smile tugging at her lips. You just blinked at her. 2 days? You'd been out for 2 days? Alexia was still crying, though, and the sound was cracking your chest open, hurting more than your head did. Placing a gentle hand on her head, you called her name.
"Ale, honey? Are you alright?" Her head snapped up. She looked like a mess. The most beautiful mess you'd ever seen, but still. She had tear tracks staining her face, bags under her eyes, and her lip was trembling pitifully.
"Am I alright? You've been in a coma for 2 days, and you're asking me if i'm alright?" she asked, seemingly baffled by your question. Mapi nodded to the other girls, tilting her head towards the door. They all rose, leaving you and Alexia in the room by yourselves. You were going to respond to her, assure her that you were fine, but she was talking before you could get any words out.
"I'm so sorry. I was so stupid. I shouldn't have broken up with you, I didn't mean it. I got all in my head, and I was worried I couldn't give you what you deserved, and I was trying to protect you, and then you went down, and I couldn't even function. I can't live without you, y/n, and I'm so sorry," she said the words rushed, as if worried you were going to cut her off, not let her finish.
You didn't say anything, the new information entering your currently very slow moving brain. Alexia's hands were wrapped in the blanket, and tears were pouring down her cheeks, yet she remained silent, giving you time to process.
"You... you broke up with me because you didn't think you were good enough for me?" You asked finally, working hard to keep your voice neutral. It was the most preposterous thing you'd ever heard, truly. Alexia nodded, not trusting her voice.
"That is one of the stupidest things i've ever heard. Seriously idiotic, Alexia. I thought I made it clear, I thought you knew that I loved you, that I only wanted you. You've always been enough for me," you told her. You knew that you should probably be mad at her, but she looked so broken, and her reasoning for breaking up with you made your heart ache for her. You couldn't be mad, not at her.
"Loved?" she asked quietly, referring to the past tense with which you'd phrased your sentence.
"Love," you corrected. "I didn't get hit hard enough to stop loving you." She smiled weakly at you, through her tears, before dropping her head back down to rest against your stomach. You ran your fingers through her hair, detangling gently as you went, and she sighed contentedly at your motions.
"I was so worried," she mumbled into you.
"What happened anyway?" you asked, only really caring to know now that Alexia had stopped crying. She picked her head up, realizing she'd given you no information on your condition.
"You hit your head. Hard. Twice. You have a concussion, and your brain swelled, and they almost had to do brain surgery, but it improved," she told you, and you could feel the worry that had had her heart in it's clenched fist loosening as she looked at you.
"When can I play again?" you asked and she snorted, because of course, that's what you were thinking about.
"The doctors say a few months, but I'm not sure I'm letting you out of the house ever again unless you're wrapped in bubble wrap."
"No," you said, "you just can't break up with me again, and I won't need to go getting major head injuries to bring you to your senses."
She laughed then, a real laugh, a real smile adorning her face. She leaned in, placing her lips on yours ever so gently, and you could feel her smiling still against your face.
"I love you," you whispered against her lips, and she whispered it back, leaning her forehead against yours. You'd be fine. You could have any injury, really, and be fine, as long as you had Alexia.
-----
slightly different from the request, but i hope you liked it :)
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The newest member | Alessia Russo
Pairing: Alessia Russo x Pregnant!Reader
Summary: Alessia being extra protective of you during your pregnancy.
Masterlist | Woso masterlist | words: 1k
Over the years you had grown to love how protective Alessia was over you. She showed her protectiveness even in the smallest of ways, it had always made you feel safe and loved. Ever since the two of you found out that you were pregnant with your first baby, her protectiveness evolved.
It started out very sweet, making sure she got you everything you needed, taking control of the conversation when the questions were getting too much for you, and setting up all the doctors appointments so that you didn’t have to worry about it. But as your pregnancy progressed, her protectiveness grew with it. You had mixed feelings over the new found protectiveness.
There were the ways that you were grateful for, like telling strangers to back up when they reached their hands out to touch your belly without permission, or making sure that she grabbed everything you needed for your wide range of cravings from the store. But there were also ways that could be rather annoying at times. The further along you got into your pregnancy the less she let you do on your own.
In your third trimester her biggest form of protectiveness was that she had taken the no heavy lifting advice that the doctor gave you as you not being allowed to lift anything. Which often led to frustration from your end. “Less, come on. There are literally two baby onesies in here, I think I can handle that on my own.” You roll your eyes at your wife as she takes the bag from your hands anyways.
In your fourth trimester she wouldn’t let you be home alone, ever. Having your wife around so much was great. She would read to the baby, make you food, and she gave you the lots of cuddles. But when she would leave to go to practice, she would have someone babysit you, which was less fun. She never called it babysitting, of course, but whenever she had to go another person randomly showed up on your doorstep. Whether it was her mom, a friend, or a teammate, there was always someone there. Luckily for you, the people she sent to babysit you never acted like that was why they were there.
While usually Alessia’s antics of having someone practically babysit you were pretty annoying, today you were grateful to have someone around. Viv was with you today, she was still out because of her ACL injury, and therefore she wasn't joining the rest of the Arsenal girls for training just yet. You were in the kitchen, getting a glass of water, while Viv was sitting on the couch. “Viv, get in here.” You yell out. Viv hears the worry in your voice and is quick to her feet. “What’s wrong?” She asks, matching your worried tone. “My water just broke.” Viv moves to your side and grabs your arm to support you, “Okay, let’s get you to the hospital then.” She leads you to the front door, she scoops up the hospital bag that Alessia had placed next to the front door a couple of weeks ago, “Just in case.” she kept saying. While you settle in the car, she gives a quick call to Jonas.
At the training field Jonas hangs up the call and heads over to the team again. “Girls, can I have everyone’s attention please.” He calls over and everyone jogs in his direction. “I thought I’d get everyone together for this announcement because I just got a call that is rather exciting.” The team has their full attention on their coach. “Alessia, your wife is in labor. Viv is driving her to the hospital as we speak.” Alessia stood in shock until her teammates start patting her on the back, and hugging her. “What are you waiting for Russo? Let’s go.” Katie says once her teammates are done hugging her. “I’ll drive.” Beth announced, rushing to the locker room to grab her keys.
You hear a knock on your hospital room door, Viv gets up and opens the door for your new guests. Alessia is immediately by your side and takes your hand in hers, “How are you feeling, baby?” She asks as she places soft kisses to your forehead. “At the moment I am mostly excited to meet this little girl.” You share.
When it was time for the delivery, Alessia ushered everyone out of the room. Over the years these girls had become your family but this was a moment you did not want them present at. Alessia stayed by your side the whole time, helping you do your breathing exercises, holding your hand, being supportive, and praising you for how well you were doing. The delivery was very hard but all was forgotten the second you got to hold your baby girl. Alessia asked one of the nurses to snap a few pictures, and enjoyed the moment of meeting your little girl for the first time.
Once the doctors and you said visitors were okay, Alessia went to the waiting room where Viv, Beth, and Katie were very impatiently waiting. “Ready to meet our healthy baby girl?” She asked as she watches everyone get up full of excitement. They follow her in the room. You don’t think you’ve ever heard them be so quiet before. “You're allowed to make noice, you know?” Effectively pulling them out of their trances. Alessia picks up the baby from the little crib, and walks towards her teammates. “These are your aunties.” The girls huddle around the newborn, admiring the little girl.
When it was time to take your little girl home, you dressed her up in the baby Arsenal jersey that Alessia got from the team. Your wife snaps a picture and sends it to the Arsenal group chat with the caption, ‘Meet the newest member of the team’.
You enjoyed your first day at home with the newest member of your family with just the two of you. Letting family and friends know that both mom and baby were doing great, and setting up times for them to meet your little girl.
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#alessia russo#alessia russo x reader#alessia russo imagine#woso#woso x reader#woso imagine#vivianne miedema#katie mccabe#beth mead
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Et Tu, Brute? | Steph Cately x Reader
Words: 2.6k
Summary: everyone betrays you. You just didn’t expect her to do the same; "et tu, brute?" - 'you too, Brutus?' – Caesar upon seeing his friend amongst his assassins
Warnings: sexual themes, sexual shaming, leaked nudes, angst, I make the arsenal girls assholes sorry. this probably isn't my best but i hope you like it
Request by - @liasputellas
The air felt different as I walked into training. I wasn’t sure what it was. Maybe the way Maggie our receptionist looked at me with disgust, or the way the whole locker room went quiet when I walked in, or the way everyone seemed to avoid me like the plague.
The rain was pelting down on us, but I stood alone on the sideline shivering as Jonas gives the rest of the team instructions. Steph seemed to be missing today despite the empty space in bed when I awoke, so I was the odd one out. He finishes and approaches me.
“I think you should take a few days off.” Is the only thing he says.
“Why? What have I done wrong? No on will talk to me.”
“You haven’t seen?” I begin to get nervous, well more nervous than I already was, as he pulls out his phone.
“I thought Steph would have shown you this morning. I wish I wasn’t the one to break it to you.” He types things in and scrolls for a while before finally landing on what he’s looking for. Then he turns the phone to me.
Arsenal’s Star Midfielder, Y/n L/n’s Naughty Pictures Have Been Leaked By An Anonymous Source
My breathing grows heavy, and my head begins to pound. My sight goes into tunnel vision as I reread the headline over and over. This can’t be fucking happening.
I take off stumbling back toward the locker room, seeking some sort of privacy to have the breakdown. I end up sitting on the floor beneath a running shower in some false hope that it will wash away everything, but it’s all for naught. There was only one person I’d ever sent photos to, and it was Steph. She’s the one person I trust with my deepest secrets and she’s not here to comfort me or help me understand why the girls are ignoring. Obviously, it has to do with the photos but, I thought they’d be by my side.
Sobs wrack my body and I lose track of time as the shower continues to run, until I hear boots clacking against the linoleum floors. I scramble to get up and leave before they arrive, but the effort is futile.
They come piling in but stop in their tracks the moment Kim sees my soaking frame looking at the floor ashamed. I try to move around them, but Katie grabs a hold of my shoulder, my drenched jersey sticking to her skin as well as my own. My eyes flick around desperately looking for someone who will let me go, but not even Kyra seems to feel remorse.
“You’re going to go home, end things with Steph and stay somewhere until you figure out where you’re transferring to. You’re not welcome back here.” Katie pushes me back toward the locker room, clearly a sign that I should fucking move and get out, but I’m stood frozen.
“Did you not hear her?” Caitlin begins to approach me, much like a lion approaches it’s prey, but I still can’t move.
“Why are you doing this? Why would I end things with Steph?”
“You’re a dirty cheating bastard that doesn’t deserve her. You’re fucking disgusting.” Despite my want to fall to the ground and cry again, I slowly move to my cubby and grab my stuff, then make my way out.
-
When I finally pull into the driveway, I become very aware of Steph’s car that fills the space again. I become wary as I close the car door and make my way to the house, fearing what I’ll meet on the other side. I juggle my keys in my hand and struggle to slide it into the lock as they shake, but eventually the wood swings away from me and I step inside.
It’s eerily quiet as I make my way down the hall. Steph’s nowhere to be seen as I pull my now damp kit off and place it in the washing machine, or when I go to our room to grab clothes to change into. I trek back through the house, eventually falling onto the couch, with no sign of my wife.
My phone buzzes and I reach for it in a hurry, hoping to see a message from Steph. Instead, it’s from a small group chat of friends from across the football scene, checking in to ask if I’m okay. I leave them on read and scroll through my contacts to find Steph. I press call, but it goes straight to voicemail.
~~~~~
15 minutes later, keys rattle against the door in a similar fashion to how I imagine mine did, and in walks Steph. When she spots me on the couch she stops in her tracks and the look on her face slowly melts into anger.
“Why are you here?” I admit the harsh tone in her voice feels like a stab to the heart.
“Well, I basically just got fired so I didn’t really have anywhere else to go Steph. Can we talk?”
“I don’t want to talk to you ever again.”
“Why? Is it because the fucking pictures you didn’t even bother to tell me about? Who doesn’t tell their wife that private pictures were leaked?”
“Don’t act like I’m in the wrong! You sent those photos to someone, it’s your fault for trusting them!”
“Who?! You? You’re saying I shouldn’t trust you?”
“No! Whoever you sent those fucking pictures to! Because it certainly wasn’t me who got them!” I freeze once I realise what she’s implying.
“Y- you really think I cheated on you? You think so low of me?”
“There is no other explanation for it Y/n!”
“You… you and the girls are fucking unbelievable. I’ve only ever sent those types of things to you Steph. Only you. You’re the only person I’ve ever trusted enough. You really think I’d throw 6 years together, 2 of those married, away like that?” I take a deep breath as I try not to break down in front of who I thought was the love of my life.
“If you scroll back far enough, you’ll find those photos in our messages. Around 11 months ago, after your birthday. Before this morning you wouldn’t have been able to find them on anyone else’s phones except ours. Which means our messages got hacked.” I stand up and bump shoulders with her as I make my way back to our room, pulling out a duffle bag and packing it.
It takes a few minutes for the brunette to follow me, looming in the door.
“What are you doing?”
“Leaving. Clearly that’s what everyone wants.”
“You’re just leaving? Just giving up?”
“Giving up!? No Steph, I’m not ‘just giving up’. You think I’m capable of cheating. You think I’d throw away all my years of loving you just like that. For what? Some random hookup with a meaningless girl I’d never see again? You clearly don’t trust me, which I can’t live with. I love you. And it’s not just you. The whole fucking team thinks so little of me. I kept my vows, why can’t you keep yours?” I continue to move around the room, collecting items I needed, as I wait for her response.
“I love you.” Is the only thing she can say, so I slip on some shoes, leaving the worn arsenal kit in the washing machine.
“I love you too. But until you can give me a proper apology, and mean it, I’m going to stay with Mackenzie or Sam. I guess tell Jonas I’ll hand in my resignation papers by tomorrow.” She grips my arm as I try to walk past her. Tears pool in her eyes and I can’t stop mine from falling.
“Please stay. We can talk.” She whispers, her bottom lip wobbling.
“I don’t think I can do that right now.” I reply, and I kiss her gently as a goodbye before I walk out the door.
~~~~~
I end up at Sam’s, having officially resigned from Arsenal the morning after leaving, who made a statement later that same day.
We deeply regret that we have to make this statement but unfortunately Y/n L/n has been let go from the Arsenal team due to conflict between players. We wish her the best wherever she ends up.
I spend a lot of time with Kristie or join Sam at training to avoid looking at the horrible things people are saying about me on my phone. Sam likes to claim it’s ‘to feel like I’m still playing’. It just makes me sad, which is why I had every intention of refusing her offer to go again today. Then she told me Emma wanted to talk to me about something.
“Why does Emma want to talk to me?” I poke Sam continuously as she leads me down the halls of Cobham.
“I have no clue.” The cheeky grin I’m very familiar with graces her face but it doesn’t hint at anything.
I push open the door and Emma directs me to sit down, which I don’t hesitate to do. Sam closes the door and leaves us to talk.
“I wanted to discuss your career’s future. You’ve spent a lot of time here with us after the situation, but have you received any offers from other clubs? What are your moves?”
“No. I haven’t received anything, no one wants to take the player who’s had a sex scandal. Not even in the Championship League.”
“Well obviously the transfer window doesn’t open until January, so it’s not on the table to bring you in as a player. But I was wondering, how do you feel about coaching. I’ve seen you give the younger players like Aggie tips, and she comes back onto the field much better, it’s clearly something you’re good at. Would it be something you’d look into doing?” I blink in shock as I try to process the question.
“Uh.. yes, yes absolutely I’d love to. I- I took the coaching courses over the break when I was out of the world cup on injury, so I’m fully qualified.”
“Well I’d love to have you on the coaching team. I’m looking for people to keep the players in line once I leave and I think someone who has played the recent developments in the game would be perfect. I have the contract ready for you to sign, right here, if you want.” She slides the paper over, and I read it over.
Am I really going to do this? Go to my clubs biggest rival? I could never make an appearance at Arsenal as a player or member of the team ever again. No one else wanted me. I couldn’t refuse the only offer I have.
“W- what about the leak? Aren’t I a liability?”
“We’re not stupid. They were personal photos between you and your wife. It’s not your fault and we know that. I want the best coaches for my team. And that’s you.”
Shock washes over the world of women’s football this week as Y/n L/n signs as an assistant coach alongside Emma Hayes at Chelsea. What does her wife, Arsenal and Australia’s star left back Steph Cately, think about this decision?
The day my signing is announced is the first time any of the Arsenal girls, including Steph, reach out to me.
‘What the fuck are you doing?’ From Katie
‘Are you serious?’ From Caitlin and Kyra
‘I genuinely hope you’re happy there. You deserve the best and we couldn’t give it to you. I couldn’t give it to you. I love you and miss you. Maybe we could talk after the derby next weekend?’ I want so bad to leave Steph on read, but I can’t help but reply.
‘We’ll see. Love you’. Kristie takes my phone from me after that.
Training is odd. Being the one running it instead of participating. I like to join in on easy drills, bonding with some players, keeping fit and helping them understand how we want it done. A win-win-win if you will. Emma’s press conference before the game against Arsenal is when things get tense again.
“What effect do you think L/n on the Chelsea coaching staff will have on Arsenal, especially her wife Steph Cately? We haven’t seen them together in quite some time.” Some guy in the back of the room asks the question but it still rings in my ears as I hear it, Kristie watching the conference on her phone because Sam’s there.
“Well I don’t think it should have any effect on their players. Players have to compete against their former teammates all the time, whether as players or coaches. This should not be any different. They kicked her out, they made that decision. We gave her the option to come back into the game when no one else was willing to take that risk, and she’s made us better. As for Steph? I don’t know how she will react. She’s an incredible player, I’m sure she’ll be fine, but that’s none of my business.” I’m grateful for the way Emma stands up for me. She’s one of the few people I now trust with what’s going on behind the scenes of my life and marriage.
It's when we’re in the dugout, the players about to come out from the tunnel, when I begin to genuinely worry. I don’t want to put Steph off her game just by being here, but I’m not going to abandon the team that gave me everything when I had nothing. So I pull on my puffer coat, put in my ear piece, and take my spot next to Emma who puts an arm around my shoulder and squeezes me tight.
Yeah. I’ll be okay.
-
The game is rough, every time we score, Arsenal comes back with a matching goal. But they’re playing dirty. They’re making unnecessary tackles and getting yellow cards every other minute.
I laugh it off until Steph makes a challenge in the penalty box. Her leg stretches out in front of her, kicking the ball away from Fran’s feet, but she falls on a funny angle and doesn’t get back up.
I walk to the edge of the coach’s box, trying to get a better view as the medics run to her.
I tell myself she’ll be okay. She’s always okay.
The medics bring out a stretcher.
She’s not okay.
“Emma-”
“Go make sure she’s okay. We’ll be okay.” I follow closely behind the medics as they carry her down the tunnel and to the medical room.
I slide into the seat beside her as their team’s doctor checks on her knee, taking her hand in mine.
“You’re here.” She smiles gently at me, and I try not to cry. I haven’t seen her in so long.
“I’m here Stephy. I love you.”
“I miss you.” She pouts then grimaces as the doctor moves her knee.
“I miss you too. But-”
“But you can’t act like everything is fine unless I prove I trust you and regret what I did.” I nod solemnly.
“I promise I’ll prove it. Maybe you can come stay at home again. Just a couple times a week. We can have dinners and catch up. I miss the way you hold me.” She squeezes my hand as she waits for an answer.
“Yeah. Yeah, we can try that.” I press a kiss to her hand.
“But I’m staying at Chelsea. They treat me right here.” Steph pauses, but smiles.
“Rivalry could be good for us. You little Blue.”
It will be a long journey, but we’ll make it through.
#woso x reader#woso#womens soccer#the matildas x reader#wsl#the matildas#steph catley#steph cately x reader#arsenal fcw
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safe and sound | leah williamson x reader
themes of suicide attempt, suicidal thoughts, self harm, depression, anxiety, angst, 4000 words
sorry this is messy asf and not spell checked whatsoever cause i’m uploading this at 1am lol but got this from a request and felt like i had to finish it before i start the lucy smut that i’m starting so here it is my loves xoxo
I blamed myself for getting myself into this position. Maybe if I’d been a better friend or a better player or maybe just if I hadn;t of woken up on the left side of the bed this morning. Maybe it would all be different if we hadn’t just won a home Euros, maybe I wouldn’t feel the same pressure from the media, maybe I wouldn’t have felt so goddamn anxious to go anywhere. Maybe if I hadn't transferred from Barca I’d feel safer, maybe if I wasn’t so focused on my career I would have seen the warning signs. I hadn’t though, hadn’t seen the way that I felt so fucking tired after every session, even the easier ones. Hadn’t noticed the fact that I wasn’t sleeping anymore and that I was always checking social media to see what people were saying about my most recent game. I hadn’t noticed that I was picking at my nail beds again until they were a bloody mess. Hadn’t noticed that the accidental nicks along my legs from my razor had slowly become less accidental. Hadn’t noticed how absolutely broken I had been from the inside out until I was sitting on top of my apartment car garage contemplating everything.
The sun was setting slowly, the yellows and pinks and oranges all mixing like a starburst tie dye across the sky. It was incredible, something I’d never really seen in London, it felt symbolic. Maybe if I hadn't been choking down my feelings for so long I wouldn’t have been looking at the concrete 30ms below me and finding comfort in it. Finding comfort in the poetic way that it spoke to me, that it made me feel a little bit more at peace. Solid, grey, concrete. Nothing special about it but there was also something so special about it. A gust of wind would probably be enough to send me plummeting onto it, my brains and blood spilling out all over it. It would never look the same after that, never be quite so mundane and normal. The bloodstain would be hard to get out, the deep maroon seeping into the stone and staining it within a matter of minutes. I thought about the headlines for a few seconds, I’d probably make the front page of about every newspaper in the nation, ‘Y/n Y/l/n, Lionesses star striker, dead at 24 due to suicide’, it sent shivers down my spine, the good kind of shivers that made you feel at peace.
I’d never really let myself get further than that, never left myself alone long enough to think of a plan, actually think about much further than sitting here. Now though I felt more alone than ever, I shouldn’t have ever left Barca, shouldn’t have left my family there. It had seemed like the right decision coming to England, to play for Arsenal, to play at home again. Now though I couldn’t have regretted my decision more, I mean I was pretty much calling Lucy or Alexia everyday telling them how desperate I was to come home, balling my eyes out to them on the phone about how much I missed our team in Spain. I was technically only on loan for a season, just to find my footing, but now I was certain that I stood no chance of surviving the whole season. The girls are lovely, Jonas was lovely, I was playing alongside the woman I loved but everything about it felt so wrong. Maybe it was the weather, or maybe it was the location but it all was just so wrong and I couldn’t tell you why. I woke up every morning, went to training, came home, ate, tried to sleep and then repeated it all. It was a strenuously depressing pattern that never ended. It was the same, day in, day out. I didn’t have my found family anymore, just myself and my girlfriend who was too occupied with being Arsenal and England’s captain to have much time for me anymore. I didn’t really blame her, she was a busy woman, and she had such a good pure heart that she used to do so much good.
Sometimes it was overwhelming to me how much she was willing to give, to other people, to anything. She put her whole heart into everything and it was something I envied so much in her. Her willingness to give up anything for the people she cared about was insane to me. She cared so deeply about everyone around her and it was truly astounding but it did leave me feeling neglected occasionally when she was busy helping out someone or busy dedicating her time to a project that needed her more than I did. I didn’t like to be needy, so maybe even though I’d been struggling for a few weeks I hadn’t flagged it with Leah.
She’d caught on somewhere along the way, stopping me one morning to check in, I’d shaken her off with a smile telling her I was just a little bit burn out with the Euro’s and changing to Arsenal, I could tell she hadn’t believed me but she also knew that I didn’t respond well to being pushed, normally she would wait me out, wait until I came crawling to her to talk but this time it felt different, like maybe this was the end. Maybe this time I wasn’t going to get around to talking to Leah, maybe this time I didn’t want her to help me, maybe I just wanted to be done with trying to be better, trying to be okay when I wasn’t. Maybe this ledge was the end of my story, maybe it was destined to be.
“Hey honey.”
The sudden voice behind me was almost enough to send me over the ledge, my knuckles turning white from clutching onto the edge. I flinched as the source of the voice climbed up onto the ledge and sat down beside me.
“Beautiful sunset, how was your day?”
It was such a mundane question and the simplicity of the statement was enough to bring me down to earth enough to realise that there were tears falling down my face and my whole body was shaking slightly.
“Reminds me of the ones in Barca. It was alright.”
Leah nodded at me, keeping her own eyes on the horizon, the sun had almost fully gone down but there were parts of it still peeking out.
“I went and saw Keira and Jill, Keira was in town to visit Millie and some of the other girls, she said she missed you, that you’d been missing her and Luce’s calls for about a week now.”
My hands were almost numb from the death grip that I had on the ledge that we were sitting on. She had distanced herself enough that we weren’t touching but close enough that I could feel her presence.
“It kept slipping my mind to call them back.”
It was all excuses, things that I was telling Leah to avoid the conversation.
“Fair enough, they’re both just worried about you, I’m worried about you sweetheart. Did you end up going for coffee with Katie this morning?”
I knew she was asking me the questions as a distraction technique, new she’d been taught it from Lucy when I’d moved here, the same stuff Lucy had been taught from my therapist. I knew that subconsciously but for some reason it worked every single time, without fail.
“Felt sick.”
“She called me, said you’d bailed last minute and asked me to check in with you for her, to tell you that you guys would have to reschedule. What did you eat for lunch?”
I could feel my legs kicking out against the solid concrete below my feet, I was averting Leah’s eye contact with everything that I could, keeping my eyes on my feet or the sky that was gradually getting darker.
“Felt sick, wasn’t hungry. Why are you here? I thought you had that dinner thing with Alex.”
It was the first question that I’d asked in the conversation, my curiosity taking over slightly.
“I came to check in with you, you weren’t answering my texts or calls and I was worried you were sick, so I came to check in before heading off to Alex’s, it’s unlike you to not be on your phone.”
I nodded, it was a fairly good explanation and it made sense but it also annoyed me so much because Leah showing up here was fucking with everything.
“You can go to Alex’s, I feel fine.”
“I love you, you know that right?”
Leah’s words hung heavy in the space between us.
“I know Lee.”
I rubbed at the tears that were drying up on my face with the sleeve of my hoodie, I was still trembling slightly but my tears had come to a slow.
“If anything ever happened to you I’d be beside myself.”
I felt my two front teeth falling to my lip, clutching it between my teeth and biting down on it.
“Lee, I’m fine.”
“No you’re not angel, and there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s okay for you to not be doing okay. We wouldn’t be sitting here if everything was fine, how about we get down from here, yeah? We can head down to your apartment, or my house if you want. We’ll go see the dogs, we can talk if you want, or we can call your therapist, or Ale, or we can just cuddle in bed, whatever you need.”
I shook my head almost immediately.
“Leah I need you to leave me alone, please, just leave, go home, go hang out with Alex, just leave me.”
“I can’t do that sweetheart and you know it, and if you can’t get down from here then you know that I won’t hesitate to call 999 if it's what I have to do to keep you safe. I love you Y/n, but I will not love you to death. So you can either get down from here by yourself or with my help, or with the help of a policeman, those are your options.”
It was the stern Leah that was now coming out now, the Leah that came out when she needed to help a teammate who was struggling but wouldn’t admit it, the Leah who was relentless and would do anything to protect the people she loved.
“I can’t do this anymore, I can’t fucking deal with this anymore.”
That was when I broke, tears and sobs cascading from my eyes and mouth.
“I know sweetheart, and I am so sorry that I didn’t realise that it had gotten this bad, I am so sorry for that. Let me make it up to you, let me take you home and I can take time off, we can both take time off, travel, whatever you need. Y/n/n, I can’t not do life without you, so let’s get down from here, let’s work this out at home.”
I was at a crossroads, on one hand I was very much so aware of the fact that I could jump right now, that Leah couldn’t stop that, I also knew that I wouldn’t do it with Leah here, the guilt of making her watch it would eat at me too much. So eventually, I was going to have to get down but for right now I couldn't, I needed to hold on to this for a little bit before having to get down and face reality.
“I’m not going to jump, I just need a few more minutes here.”
“I don’t know if I trust you right now honey, no offence, but I’m looking out for you.”
I nodded, it was fair judgement, I probably wouldn’t trust me either in her position.
“You can hold onto me if it helps, I just need some time here.”
Leah conceded to me, but wrapped her arm securely around my waist, moving herself so she was flush against me and holding me tightly against her body.
“How was Keira?”
“She was good, misses you, her and Lucy are good, I think Keira is getting the sense that Lucy might be tiptoeing around proposing. Apparently she’s been very secretive and antsy, typical Lucy fashion, I told her I knew nothing. Jill made me promise that we’d meet up with her, she says she misses my better half. I picked up Scout from the groomers, you should see the hair cut they gave her, just pure fluff. I went to the grocers, the fancy one that you love so much down the road, picked up all of your favourite stuff, even the stupidly expensive soup that you like. If you want we can go back to mine and you can eat it while we talk.”
She was trying to coax me away, with the promise of soup, which sounded so stupid but she knew me so well that it made me laugh a little bit.
“Can I have the soup without talking?”
“You can drink the soup first but we have to talk and you know it, whether you realise it or not it’s for the better.”
I nodded into Leah’s side, she was right, she was always right. She was so wise for her age and sometimes it felt like instead of being two years older than me she was 20.
“Let’s head home, yeah?”
I pursed my lips, still contemplating my options.
“You’re going to make me anyways, right?”
“Yeah babygirl, it’s for the best.”
I nodded at Leah, accepting defeat.
“Can you help me?”
Leah nodded at me almost immediately, getting herself down and then reaching up for me. She lifted me off of the ledge and pulled me down onto the ground beside her. The first thing she did was drape her jacket around my shivering form. She didn’t say anything else, she just immediately started walking, dragging me along towards her car and gracefully fastening the passenger seat belt around me before climbing into the driver's seat and started to drive.
The car ride was silent, I was a shivering, crying, mess. Leah was keeping up her strong facade, clearly not prepared to give me any sympathy. It wasn’t her way, she was a tough love kind of person. She gave it to you how it was and that was that. I loved her for that, I didn’t like people who bull shitted you with false sympathies and sweetness, I was a realist and so was Leah.
The drive to her house was reasonably short, she lived about a ten minute drive from my apartment or a half an hour walk. It was convenient, especially when one of us needed a little bit of space but we also wanted to be within reach of the other. When we did make it back to her house I was kind of feeling inexplicably numb, my thoughts eating at my brain and body and leaving me feeling frozen in time. Leah unbuckled me from my seat and helped me up, helped me walk through her front door before getting me seated on her couch with our dogs before walking into the kitchen to get that soup that she’d promised me.
When she did finish warming up the soup I was melting into the couch practically, our dogs, Scout and Saidee had apparently gotten the message that I needed them, so both of them were draped on top of me, it was what I needed. Leah returned with a bowl of soup and placed it down on our coffee table before sliding in next to me on the couch.
“I’d give the soup a few minutes to cool down, how about we talk until then?”
I didn’t want to talk, but it didn’t seem like I had a choice.
“What do you want to talk about?”
“How long have you been feeling not okay?”
It was a rough question, but not something that I hadn’t been expecting.
“Honestly, a few weeks, since my move here. I love you and I love being with you but being here isn’t easy for me and I’m struggling to settle in.”
Leah nodded, I knew it wasn’t going to be easy for her to hear, that’s probably why I’d avoided telling her for as long as possible. Arsenal was her family, Arsenal ran in her blood and I knew that there was a chance she’d take it personally that I hadn’t been finding it easy to settle in.
“Okay, I wish you’d told me earlier but that’s okay. Change isn’t easy, I can’t blame you for struggling. Obviously, I love having you here but if it’s not meant to be then it’s not meant to be. I’m sorry if I haven’t been focusing on you enough, I know that I’ve been so occupied with everything else but that isn’t a good enough reason for me to have been neglecting you. I have to ask this question, were you going to kill yourself tonight?”
I took a deep breath through my nose, no one is ever prepared for that question, it’s not something anybody wants to hear or talk about ever.
“Look, I’m not quite sure. I wasn’t really thinking, if you hadn't showed up, maybe. I don’t know Leah, I just know that I was feeling so fucking out of control and when I fele out of control I stop thinking.”
Leah just pursed her lips, it was clear that she didn’t know exactly what to say, or she was trying to put what she was thinking into words.
“Okay, that’s okay. Obviously it’s not okay, but that’s okay. We have options here, you have options. Let’s book an appointment with your therapist tomorrow, firstly. Secondly I think you and I should maybe sit down and have a proper conversation about your mental health, just so that I can become more educated on it and I can be more aware of these kinds of situations, because I want to be. I love you y/n and I want to be here to support you fully, but if I’m going to do that I need to understand how I can love you but also look after you and help you, because I want to.”
I was anxiously patting our dogs stomach, as I thought about how the fuck I was going to talk to Leah about this.
“I’ve had fucked up mental health since I was a kid, it fluctuates, you know that I get panic attacks and spouts of depression. Sometimes it worsens, Lucy can give you more details, honestly I don’t think I’m the best at explaining it. Sometimes I get really low, I’ve had my fair share of suicidal thoughts and self harm over the years, I’ve never gone through with anything and honestly my mental health has been really good over the year or so, that was why I didn’t flag it with you, and I’m sorry I didn’t. I am so sorry that you had to see me like that, I’m sorry that your fucking worrying about me.”
Leah’s arm wove its way around my waist, bringing me flush against her and it felt so right in that moment.
“Y/n, look at me.”
It was the first time that I’d looked her in the eyes the whole night and it kind of hurt in some bizarre way staring into her brown eyes. They were full of so much emotion, so much feeling and pain in them.
“You should not be sorry for having human emotion. I’m sorry for not seeing the warning signs, for not being around enough to see the signs. I’m still learning, I’m trying to be better for you, so let’s just agree that neither of us are perfect. This is new to me, but I’m going to try my fucking hardest for you, whatever you need. We’re going to make you feel happier, put that smile back on your face that made me fall in love with you, if it’s the last thing I do. Maybe we take a break if that’s what you need, or we explore other options, anything to make you feel happier, anything for my girl.”
#woso#leah williamson#lionesses#woso community#arsenal wfc#leah williamson x reader#katie mccabe#lucy bronze#marry me rn
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You're Not Okay
Part 7 - Fire on Fire Seires
A/N: Sorry this update took so long to get out. I have just been super busy.
Warnings: Suicide, Vomiting
“Are you okay?” Leah asked as you found yourselves next to each other in the locker room.
“Yeah I’m fine why?”
“Because…” she trailed off.
“I knew it was coming, honestly I knew they didn’t like me, I let it get to me and I shouldn’t have, but I promise I’m fine.”
“No you look sick, do you feel okay?”
“Yes, as I said I’m fine,” that was a lie, you definitely didn’t feel fine, your head ached slightly, your throat was slightly sore and your whole body felt tired, probably due to the fact you hadn’t slept the past two nights, but you weren’t going to tell her. You walked away from her and sat down in your locker so you could tie your boots.
Somehow Leah and you were the last ones left in the locker room and before you made it through the door, she grabbed your hand.
“Go away Leah, I told you I’m fine,” you half shouted at her, now glaring at her as you faced her.
“But you’re not, you’re not okay. I don’t know how they treated you at your last club, but here we care about your feelings and your health, I care, I care that you’re okay, and you clearly aren’t,” Her words threatened to make you break down right there and then but you didn't, turning to your only other emotion you could currently be in, anger. “Just leave me the fuck alone Leah, I told you I’m fine,” you reiterated for about the 100th time before turning away.
-
You were a mess during the first half of training, your passes were sloppy, you were giving the ball away constantly and you were considerably slower than usual. You knew training wasn’t the best idea but you didn’t want to be left alone at home, in your own thoughts, especially today, so you came anyway, however Leah pulled you aside “Are you okay? I think you should go home” she asked yet again whilst she stared deep into your eyes.
“As i’ve already told you I’m fine,” you replied, “Y/N, I don’t think you are, and I agree I think you should go home, we will see you tomorrow, understood,” Jonas said as he took a step closer to you and Leah, giving you a stern look.
“Understood,” you mumbled before turning to glare at Leah as you walked away.
______
“Y/N, it’s just me,” Leah announced as she walked through your door, only to find you still in your training kit curled up on your couch crying. She quickly dropped everything she had and moved to sit with you on the couch, picking you up and placing you in her lap. After some time of you crying in her lap and her just holding you, your breath started to even out as you began to fall asleep.
“You feel a little warm,” she told you as she wiped away the remainder of your tears, you tiredly bobbed your head, before looking up at her slightly “my head hurts a bit, and I feel kind of sick,” you admitted, to which she nodded before she moved out from underneath you, walking towards the kitchen.
“Take these,” she said as she returned to your side and handed you some panadol and water, you did as she said and she handed you a bottle of Powerade and instructed you to drink some of it before she let you go to sleep.
–
You woke up with your head in Leah’s lap, feeling slightly better from getting some sleep, you slowly turned over so you could look up at her, as her caring blue eyes looked down at you with concern you were flooded with a wave of emotion.
“I’m sorry I didn’t spend your night with you, celebrating like we planned. I just-” tears started to fall from your eyes again and you let out a shaky breath before rolling over and burying your face in her stomach. “I’m sorry, I’m a crap friend,” you mumbled into her stomach.
“It’s okay, you don’t have to apologise, and you most definitely aren’t a crap friend,” she reassured you as she rubbed her hand up and down your back as you started to sob again.
“Baby, you know it’s okay to not be okay, you don’t have to be strong, for anyone, it’s okay to say you’re not okay and ask for help. It’s not a sign of weakness,” she said as she placed her hands under your arms and pulled you up, moving you so that you were sat in her lap once again. You just pushed your face into the crook of her neck as you continued to cry.
-
“C-can I tell y-you?” you asked her through sobs, a little while later.
“Yes, absolutely and I will listen but please don’t feel like you have to tell me, it’s up to you,” she told you as her hand continued to rub your back.
“No. I want to,” you told her and she nodded her head, “but can you not say anything until i’m finished,” you sat up in her lap, leaning against her arms slightly which were still wrapped around your back, you looked at her with big eyes and if Leah was honest she could’ve melted there and then, she nodded and so you took a deep breath before you started. You told her about your parents, from the very start, and spoke about the edits and what happened that night, and she didn’t talk just like you asked.
“Um, and,” you started the next park, as you began to get choked up again, and Leah pulled you forward, back into her and you collapsed into her embrace, “fi-five years ago today, I-I, I well, um, I walked into my best friend’s apartment after not seeing her for ages and she was dead, she had killed herself, and I hadn’t realised how bad she was in her head and I couldn’t help blame myself and my parents tried to convince me that that’s what happens when you disappoint your parents, that the guilt sinks in and you kill yourself, they tried to guilt trip me into stopping football. But she had left me a letter and it was directions to a box, a box of letters. She had been planning for ages. I felt so bad I never noticed. I was meant to be her best friend and I failed her. She had written a letter for every big moment in my life, I haven’t been able to bring myself to open the ones for Arsenal yet, I’m too scared, I don’t want to disappoint her. I choose Arsenal over City for her, and I just want to make her proud. I haven’t slept more than like 2 hours each night the past two nights because everytime I close my eyes I see her, on the floor in a pool of her own blood, I-I, uh, I just, it’s unfair that I get to be happy and she is dead, that I was so wrapped up in my own life I didn’t realise she wanted to kill herself. I thought at one stage it would be fair if I killed myself too, but my problems weren’t as big as hers, I have never looked at my problems in the same way I used to. If my parents did what they did two days ago before her death I would’ve thought it was the end of the world but it isn't. I still have other family that loves me very much. She didn’t. Her whole family disowned her for being gay, and I used to complain about my life to her, and I just-” “shh, it’s okay, I know you’ve told me not to speak but I’m worried you’re going to make yourself more sick than you already are. Just take some deep breaths, I’m here, I-” Leah seemed to stop herself saying something, “I’m here for you and I won't go anywhere. I understand it must be hard and I will be here for you, if you ever want to talk more.”
“I have an idea,” Leah spoke up after a while, you lifted your head slightly resting your chin on her sternum and looking up at her, “what if you made a post, about your parents, saying something about what happened and about your aunts, only if your comfortable,” you nodded and moved to get your phone before sitting next to her. After a long discussion you settled on a photo of your aunts from the world cup, with the caption.
I would just like to inform my fans that the two people who are my parental figures and who have supported me everyday, in all my ambitions are these two wonderful women. Moster and Tante I can’t thank you enough for everything you have done for me over the years, from taking me in to supporting my dreams and helping me achieve my dreams. I respectfully ask that everyone who has already posted how ‘supportive’ and ‘cute’ my parents are to take all pictures and images down and for noone to post again, as that is far from the truth, my parents were not there to support me that match but rather tell me that they were cutting me off and they would never consider me part of their family again, because of my choice in career.
“I’m going to post it,” you said and Leah nodded, you squeezed her hand tighter as you hit post. Once it was uploaded you felt a wave of relief rush over you before a wave of nausea, you bolted to the toilet and emptied your stomach as soon as you were in front of it, Leah was close behind you and tied back your hair before rubbing your back and whispering comforting words to you.
“I’m sorry,” you said as you finished and collapsed back into Leah, she reached up and grabbed some toilet paper to wipe your face before she closed the lid and lent forward to flush the toilet.
“Don’t apologise for being sick, never apologise for being sick, it's not your fault. Do you think it was the emotions or because you’re feeling sick?”
“Maybe a mix of both,” you sighed in defeat.
“That’s okay. It's okay, how about you go to your bed and maybe get changed into something more comfy and I’ll come join you in a sec, I’ll just go grab somethings,” you nodded at her before she helped you stand up.
When Leah came back into your room you had managed to change into something more comfortable and you were lying down on top of the covers. Leah slipped onto the bed next to you, she was sitting up leaning against the headboard with her legs stretched out infront of her, you shuffled into her so that your head rested on her hip and your front was pressed into her legs, she placed a hand under you head and around your back moving it ever so slightly to comfort you. You fell asleep quickly, feeling safe next to her.
—-
The doorbell woke you up and Leah looked down at you questioningly, watching as the wheels in your brain turned, looking out your window to see it was now dark out..
“Shit, I was meant to have dinner with Beth,” you sighed out as you went to sit up.
“No, you’re definitely in no position to do that, stay here and I’ll go talk to her,” she started to walk to the bedroom door, “and don’t worry I will apologise.”
“She said she hopes you feel better soon, and if you’re feeling up to it in the next few days we think we might organise a day out with the team, so you will see her then, and she said there is no need to apologise.” Leah said as she came back in, you nodded before rolling over and tears started to fall from your eyes, you felt so bad for interrupting everyone and ruining plans and hijacking Leah’s night. She said nothing but instead slipped into the bed next to you and pulled you into her, wrapping her arms around you as you cried.
#woso#woso community#woso fanfics#woso imagine#woso x reader#arsenal wfc#awfc#awfc x reader#leah williamson#leah williamson x reader#wosoamazing fireonfire
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It’s Lucy | Lucy Bronze x reader
Summary: reader has a panic attack and Lucy tries to comfort her.
Warnings: angst; allusion to past violent/abusive relationship with family/partner.
Words: 1.9k
I sit against the radiator of the bathroom.
Same place where I sat as a child, when I cried hiding myself in the same type of room and behind that door.
That door that I was forced to close in silence so that no one would know I was inside, leaving only the small light on the cabinet.
I always ended up in the same position.
Back against the radiator.
Head on knees.
Arms holding the legs to the chest, the calves against the thighs.
It's the same position I have now.
And, like then, the chest twists on itself due to the sobs.
Tears running down my cheeks.
I bite my lip until it bleeds in an attempt to hold back the laments, the noises.
Like when I was a kid and didn't want to disturb anyone.
But now I'm alone, at home.
In another city.
In another country.
But that anxiety never goes away.
That fear of being heard.
That fear of being discovered.
That fear of making the situation worse.
Lucy isn't there.
She is at the Barcelona camp, somewhere around Portugal.
Jona had allowed me not to go.
He had seen how bad I was, how badly I was playing, and he had asserted that my mental health was more important.
He had insisted that I was supposed to stay in Barcelona, at home.
So why do I feel so guilty?
I had put my phone on not disturb mode and the only thing I have done during these days as an attempt to communicate was reply to his text every night.
I'm okay.
No more words, no less.
It didn't matter what he wrote to me.
It didn't matter what he was talking about.
It didn't matter what photo he sent me of the team.
I didn't answer anything other than I'm okay.
It didn't matter if it was a lie.
I hadn't checked the messages and calls from Lucy, from Alexia, from the team.
I was, and am, too scared to read them.
To confront the disappointment they feel about me not being with them.
For my having stayed at home.
For my not being enough.
The fear of finding out that Lucy is mad at me makes me nauseous every time.
So I can't look at them.
Read them.
Answer to the calls.
And also because I hadn't heard my voice since she left and it wouldn't surprise me to know that it's gone.
Since Lucy had left I had spent the days at home, alternating between the living room and the bedroom.
A sense of nausea, fear, discomfort pervaded my body since the first second that I was alone.
Preventing me from eating.
Preventing me from going out.
Preventing me from doing anything other than lying still.
Lucy had left, she was forced to leave, having no justification not to.
Mapi was injured, so she was in Barcelona.
She had tried to convince me to open the door of the house: she had camped out on the landing of the floor all the first night, until the next morning the old woman from the flat next to mine had threatened to call the police if she didn't leave.
Three days had passed.
I didn't expect her to come back.
I love her, we are friends, but I never thought I deserved that treatment, that attention, that try one more time.
And, in the end, she had only confirmed my idea, my feeling of not being enough.
My nails penetrate the flesh of my calves.
My hands crush the skin.
I feel dirty.
Useless.
How is it possible that I can't even do my job anymore?
The house lock clicks.
I gasp in fright.
I hold my body even tighter as if this could protect me.
I will not move.
I don't know who they are, but it's not important.
I'm not important.
I hear footsteps.
The sound of an object being thrown to the ground.
The sounds of some doors being opened.
Are they thieves?
It does not make sense, it's still evening.
Maybe it's Lucy.
But why didn't she call me?
I bite my lip.
Then I hear the bathroom door open.
“Amor”
I huddle in on myself.
I try to disappear, to merge with the radiator.
Is she angry?
Does she want to hurt me?
I close my eyes.
“Amor”
I whine.
The pain in the chest increases more and more.
I hear her sit on the floor.
“Don't hurt me, please”
I hear her holding her breath.
“Amor, look at me”
I shake my head.
“I'm sorry Lucy… I'm sorry, I really am - I moan, blood dripping down my calves - I swear… it wasn't enough, but I tried”
There is silence.
Why doesn't she scream?
Why doesn't she hit me?
I feel arms hugging me.
I squirm.
I try to move her away, to push her away.
I don't deserve this affection.
I can't even do my job.
Study.
Leave the house.
Why doesn't she hit me?
Her hair touches my nose.
My forehead against the crook of her neck.
She says something to me but I can't hear it.
The noise in my head is too loud.
The noise of the beats, of the tachycardia, invades the ears.
A dull, constant, fast sound.
I tell her that I can't hear, that I can't understand.
I hold her tight.
My nails dug into the sleeve of her arm.
My tears wet her shirt.
She asks me if she can medicate me.
The worried, sweet voice.
I don't answer, scared at the idea that it's an excuse to leave.
To hurt me.
She asks it again, telling me that she would like to treat my calves.
I swallow saliva.
I grip her forearm tightly.
Two of her fingers rest against my chin.
They force it upwards.
Her eyes fixed on mine.
“Everything will be fine, you just have to cooperate with me, okay?”
I look at her scared.
“Please… Please don't hurt me”
Her gaze softens even more.
She tells me that the only thing she will do to me is medicate me, that she won't hurt me.
She then walks away towards the medicine cabinet.
She opens it and takes out a first aid kit.
The one where there are gauzes, disinfectant, plasters and everything else.
She approaches again.
“Now, every time I do something I'll tell you, so you know what's going on and you can stop me if you need to, okay?”
Will she stop or is she lying?
I nod slightly, too weak to protest, to oppose her.
She opens the kit and I flinch at the sound of the zipper opening.
She soaks a piece of cotton with some disinfectant.
“Amor, can you stretch your legs a little? This will make it easier to disinfect the cuts"
I don't respond, I just execute.
She asks me to leave them slightly bent, so that they don't touch the ground.
I feel the sting of disinfectant on a cut.
I groan in pain, sucking air between my teeth.
Her other hand touches my knee, the thumb caressing the skin.
“I'm sorry, I swear - I whisper, scared, hesitating when her eyes look into mine - I didn't think... I'm so sorry”
“Amor, don't worry” she whispers before chastely kissing my knee.
Then she continues, wound by wound, to disinfect me.
Why does she disinfect them?
Why is she so caring?
I don't deserve it.
I know it, and I bet she knows it too.
If she wants to hurt me why does she medicate me?
“I think it's better to not cover them, so they'll dry quickly, okay?”
I nod.
I no longer look into her eyes.
I look at her hands.
They are stained with my blood.
They smell of disinfectant.
The air smells of disinfectant.
Is she angry?
Why is she so sweet?
So loving?
I bite my lip.
Her shirt is stained with disinfectant.
Or maybe it's blood?
The spot is dark, small.
“Can you get up? So we can go to bed."
I plant a hand against the floor, but as soon as I try to get up I feel my strength fail.
I shake my head moaning softly.
I curl up in fear that she will hit me.
That she will start screaming.
Will she hurt me for this?
I close my eyes in terror as she approaches me, her arms raised towards me.
“Can I pick you up so I can take you to bed?”
I watch her.
Eyes widening.
She-
That's why she is so caring.
Of course.
Why did I believe there was no ulterior motive?
How could I be so stupid?
How long was she at the camp?
A week?
Is that why she medicated me?
Because then we can go to bed and-
I push myself towards the radiator
The fear that it will happen again, that she will hurt me too, invades my body.
The memories that come back to mind.
My hands hold my legs, my back pressed against the radiator.
“Please… don't hurt me - she looks at me confused, her lips parted - We-we will do it, I swear - I gasp in terror - but not now, I beg you. I-I don't feel I can do it."
She looks at me.
The confusion in her eyes.
She hesitates, pulling her arms back against her body.
“I just want to make you lie down, you can't stay on the floor all evening” her voice worried.
Maybe scared of my reaction.
“We won't do anything, I promise - I look at her - I just wish you were in a more comfortable place”
I look at her trying to figure out if she's lying about herself.
Maybe she really just meant-
“You won't hurt me?” I ask hesitantly.
She shakes her head.
Her lips parted.
“I would never hurt you, amor”
A hint of urgency in her voice.
Can I trust her?
It's Lucy.
I can trust Lucy.
Right?
It's Lucy.
The sweet girl who gave me Lego flowers because she had seen them in a store and she had thought of me.
The loving girl who always hugs me because she knows that physical contact is the only thing that calms my anxiety.
The caring girl who always orders my favorite pizza when she understands that I'm having a bad day.
It's Lucy.
With her transparent glasses, nose piercing and freckles.
I bite my lip.
The tears welling up in my eyes.
Why do I always ruin everything?
She'll dump me after this.
She won't want to deal with me anymore.
I look at her again.
I know that if she tries to hurt me I won't stop her.
I will cry, but I won't fight her.
I don't have the force to do it.
Ever since I ran away from that house I promised myself I wouldn't let anyone hurt me or hit me, but the reality is that now it is so difficult to fight, to oppose, her.
I nod.
She's right, I can't spend all night on the floor.
In one way or another, we will end up in that bed together.
In one way or another, if she wants, she will find the opportunity to hurt me.
Her arms lift me up.
One under the crook of the knees, one under the middle of the back.
I instinctively push myself against her chest.
My hands clutching the fabric of her t-shirt.
The tears that wet it.
“I-I'm sorry Lucy”
She places me on the bed.
She kisses my forehead, then my nose.
“Don't think about it now, - she kisses my nose again - Whatever happened, it doesn't matter. I love you” she whispers, before lying down next to me, covering us with the blankets and hugging me.
It's Lucy.
I'm not sure that the way I wrote the allusions to Reader's past life is correct: in my native language they work, but I'm not familiar enough with English to know 100/100 if the way I wrote them is correct. If they are wrong please point it out to me, explain me what is the correct way and I will change them (so I can learn for the next time too). Thank you so much:)
#woso#woso fanfics#woso x reader#lucy bronze#lucy bronze x reader#lucy bronze imagine#lucy bronze fanfic#woso imagine
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Hey Siri, Play Jealous by Nick Jonas | BarTender!Eddie
ty @mmunson86 for the idea 😚
Wc 2.4k
Cw: You see another woman flirting with your husband when you go to visit him at work, smut ok no minors 🔞 only description of the reader is what they are wearing
You’re late, Eddie was expecting you at his bar at 8:00pm like always, except it was already 8:45pm and you were just leaving the house. You were running behind because you were trying to look extra special for him. It has been a while since the two of you had been intimate. You’ve been married for a little over a year now and to say you’re still in the honeymoon faze is an understatement. However in the past month or so, it’s been lacking. Work has been draining you so much that you’d only want to sleep after the two of you would come home from closing up the bar. Eddie's business was doing very well, so much so that he needed to hire more help but training had been taking longer than expected, so there was no way he was able to leave the bar unsupervised, he had to work.
You wanted to get dolled tonight for the both of you. That’s why you decide to go all out for him, to show just how much you want him. Your hair was done at the salon after work, you refreshed your makeup to more of an evening look and you bought new lingerie just as a surprise, and to top it off you put on that midnight blue mini dress he loves so much. That’s why you’re late tonight.
You walk into the bar and take in the familiar surroundings. You make a B line to the main bar to the far right, and you spot him immediately. There he is, leaning over the bar, a toothy smile plastered on his face, his hair was down, framing his beautiful chiselled face, both elbows resting leaning into someone that you can’t quite see yet over the crowd. As you make your way through the horde of people you’re able to make out who it is he’s speaking to. Your heart stops and a wave of insecurities washes through you. The person he is charming was a beautiful brunette, evidently sitting alone. You can automatically tell by her body language that she’s openly flirting with your husband. The sirens in your mind are screaming, MINE MINE MINE. Can she not see the single wedding ring adorning his hand? It’s not like the other hand, hidden with the rest of his signature rings.
Eddie stands up, turning to make another drink, mid-way through he spots you. At first, he’s taken aback by how good you’re looking tonight. You have on that tight low-cut dress he loves so much. Was that a push-up bra you were wearing? Yes, it was. As you got closer the smell of your perfume consumed his sense, it was the same one you wore on your wedding night. Was tonight your anniversary? No, it wasn’t. Eddie was sure of it. So why were you all dressed up?
You sit down on the bar stool next to the leggy Brunette, side-eyeing her as you do. Eddie always knows how to read you, he knows you are about to start acting up. Eddie enjoys it, so he lets it happen.
“What can I get for you doll face?” Eddie eyes you up and down. He clocks your jealousy in a second.
“Whatever she isn’t having” nodding to the drink he had just made the brunette.
He playfully rolled his eyes while she scoffs at you. So this is how you’re going to play tonight? Yes. Do you care she is a paying customer? No. She’s probably thinking her drinks will be free by flashing her tits to your husband.
Eddie gets to work on your favourite drink, you don’t have to tell him, he didn’t have to ask, but he wanted to have some fun.
“I don’t know who you think you are but I saw him first.” The brunette flips her long hair over her shoulder.
“Oh really? Did you now?” You raise your perfectly sculpted brows to her. You can see Eddie’s shoulder slightly moving up and down like he’s stifling a laugh, which he was.
“Looks like you’re taken anyway, what your man who gave you that rock not satisfying you?” She motions to the 2-karat diamond ring Eddie gave you as an engagement ring. It's sat there for 3 years along with the newer wedding band to match. So she notices your ring but not Eddie’s? “Have to run out on him like a little tramp?” She smirks thinking she’s won the battle.
You don’t think twice, you hop your ass on the bar, swing your legs over and plop down on the other side. You grab Eddie’s shirt by the collar, startling him a bit, and kiss him. You kiss him hard, calming your territory and he pulls away.
“This chick bothering you baby?” You look over at her, face in shock. Eddie didn’t think It wasn’t funny anymore, he should have stopped the situation from escalating sooner,
He firmly whispers in your ear to go to his office and don’t talk to any more customers on your way there...You’re in trouble. what you did was unprofessional. However, technically you didn’t work there. You walk from behind the bar and he apologized to the brunette for your actions, yet she’s the one who called you a slut.
Not even 5 minutes later the door swings open and slams shut. Eddie locks the door and turns to see you sitting in his desk chair.
“on your knees. Now.” He points to the ground in front of him.
As you slowly get up revealing that you’d taken off your dress leaving you in just the black lacy set you had on underneath for him. If he was affected by it, he didn’t show it, he just continues speaking.
“You think you can play these games while I’m at work? You think you can just walk in here an hour late, start acting up, looking like that, and you’re not going to get into trouble?” Your pricing eyes look up so innocently like you’ve done nothing wrong.
“You’re mine, and you were flirting with that wom-”
“Are you talking back to me right now?” Eddie cuts you off.
You both know this isn’t how he truly feels. This was your little song and dance the two of you did. You could see he was holding back a smirk.
“No” you answered.
“Don’t make me tell you again” he cupped your throat and you let a moan slip.
You sunk ever so slowly to your knees. His cock was already painfully hard, seeing you kneel before him.
You grazed your hand over his tented jeans.
“You’re in no place to tease sweetheart “ he undid his pants shoving them and his underwear down to release his cock. The tip was already red and leaking pre cum, ready and waiting for you.
“Open up sweetheart, show me you can be my good girl”
He didn’t have to tell you twice, you opened your mouth slightly sticking out your tongue. He slapped the head of his dick on it a few times before sliding it in.
His head fell back with pleasure, as your warm wet mouth consumed him.
“You’re taking it so well baby, being such a good girl” he didn’t give you a chance to take control he just slowly thrust into your mouth, slowly picking up speed as he began to throat fuck you.
“You think I would want anyone but this perfect mouth baby? Do you think I would want to replace you with someone else? Not a chance “ he spoke through gritted teeth.
You can feel a puddle of heat collecting in your panties. Your blood was rushing south, your now swollen clit was throbbing and begging to be touched. Eddie gripped your hair at the back of your head. You’re sure your perfectly styled hair was now ruined. The tears were forming in your eyes as he continuously fucked into your mouth.
“My perfect girl, look at you, so good to me” He abruptly pulled out giving you a chance to catch your breath. He placed his hands on your shoulders to lift you up. He grabbed your throat as he kissed you sloppily.
“Get on the couch” he walks you backwards, hand still attached to your throat, kissing you until the backs of your knees fold against the plush green corduroy. You plop down with a bounce.
“Spread those legs for me baby, let me see you” he hovered over you, both hands settled beside each ear on the back of the couch.
You slowly opened your legs, exposing more of he delicate black lacy number you had on.
He trails a single finger down your chest, across your tummy, and stopped at the hem of your thong.
“This new baby?” He pinches is fingers into the gusset of your panties and snaps the material.
“Already soaked for me and I haven’t even touch you yet.” He motioned to his fingers covered with your heat.
“Baby, please touch me” You grind your hips into nothing, begging for his touch, the only touch that ever gives you the amount of pleasure you desire.
“You think you deserve it? You’ve been naughty” He questioned.
“Yes, baby, please, I need you, it’s been so long, I need it, please” You’re begging your husband to fucking touch you and he was reviling in it.
“You need me to claim you? Let everyone know who you belong to? Hmmm is that it? Not enough that I made you my wife? Just had to claim me in front of everyone in the bar”
“Yes you're mine” you state.
“Fine, but only because I haven’t tasted this pussy in weeks” He didn’t give you time to reply. He moved so quickly, shoving your lacy panties to the side and attaching his lips to yours. He ran his hot tongue up your slit, collecting all your wetness in his wake. He hummed into your pussy as a sign of enjoyment. He circled your clit, finally getting relief from the pulsing that has been building since the second you walked into the bar. You groped the back of his head like he did you minutes before. “Oh right there!” You let your head rest on the back of the couch, soaking in the marvellous feeling of Eddie's mouth on you. His 5 o’clock shadow was brushing your inner thighs as he ran his face up and down, and side to side. He was devouring you. Every touch, every kiss, every lick was consuming you. The build on your lower abdomen was growing, you were being wound up tighter and tighter. “More please” You managed to whisper.
“Good girl, remembering her manners” Eddie spoke into you while inserting a single finger into your wet hole. “More baby, I need more” You ground your hips into him.
“Greedy greedy girl” Eddie takes his finger out of you just as quickly as it went in, he gives your pussy a small slap and stood up. You cried at the loss of him, but it was short-lived. He crouched down to bring one leg up and rested it on his shoulder. He lines himself up at your entrance and groaned as his throbbing cock slid into you effortlessly.
“This what you wanted baby? *thrust* To fuck you *thrust* in my bar *thrust* You got all pretty just for me? *thrust* All pretty just so I would fuck you silly tonight is that it?” You couldn’t answer, you were in fact being fucked dumb. Eddie sped up with each thrust and with each thrust the head of his cock would brush up against that spot. The spot that made you see stars.
“Answer me” he gripped your chin and made you look into his eyes, his beautiful brown eyes that made you fall in love with him. Looking into his eyes snapped you back into reality. “No, it’s not what I wanted” his hips stopped mid-thirst not expecting your answer. You strain your neck to connect your lips. You kiss him, you’re desperate for his affection. Touch starved by the weeks without intimate moments like this. Eddie kissed you back with the same need you both needed this just as much as the other.
“No baby it’s what I needed” you spoke into his mouth. Eddie groaned and flipped you over. He yanked down your thong and bent down to give your pussy one last kiss before splitting you open again. The new angle made your eyes roll to the back of your head, and the sounds of your moans, and skin-to-skin filled the room. Your moans could be heard above the sounds of the noisy bar on the other side of the door, but none of that mattered.
“Baby touch me please I’m so close” you panted. A hand reaches around your lower tummy down your mound and attached to your clit. A cry of pleasure left your mouth as he grazed your clit while plowing into you.
“Give it to me baby, claim me as yours” Eddie gritted out, you can tell he was getting tired but he wasn’t about to give up.
“Your pussy was made for me, going to fill you up with my cum, gunna give you a baby”
His words had you coming on his cock instantly, your body shook with pleasure and he continued to pound into you as he rode out your orgasm and chased his. “Give me your cum baby, I need it. I wanna have your baby” you cried as he continuously fucked into you balls deep, they were slapping your clit overstimulating you just prolonging your orgasm. That seemed to do for Eddie. You beg Eddie to fill you with his cum making him pump his hot load into you time and time again.
You felt Eddie slump his body over yours as he let out a sigh.
“God I missed this” he gave you a peck on the cheek before pulling out. You whimpered at the loss of connection.
He damped some paper towels with his water bottle to clean you up. It’s the best he could do without having to go back into the bar bathroom.
“Don’t ever think I would want any other girl other than you” he kissed you before having to walk back out into the bar. The impromptu 30-minute break was not on the schedule. He needed to make sure everything was ok in the bar. You found your dress and walked back out like nothing happened.
The leggy brunette was now snuggled up to some other guy in the back booth, you make eye contact and give her a little wink. Eddie was already back behind the bar, lipstick still smudged on his face but you couldn’t really tell in the dim light.
“See you at home for round two hot stuff” You leaned over the bar to give him one last kiss goodbye. Eddie groaned, he still has 2 hours left until closing he wasn’t sure he could wait that long.
Master list
#Eddie munson x reader#Eddie munson smut#older!eddiemunson#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson x afab reader#Eddie munson imagine#eddie munson x female character#eddie munson x reader smut#older!eddie munson#bartender!eddie#bartender!eddiemunson#eddie munson x f!reader#older!eddie#eddie munson#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson x you#Eddie munson blurb#bartender!eddie munson#eddie munson x smut#eddie munson fan fiction#eddie munson fan fic
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𝗽𝗶𝗻𝗮 𝗰𝗼𝗹𝗮𝗱𝗮 - 𝗰.𝗽𝗶𝗻𝗮
warnings: tiny angst, putellas!reader
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"incoming!"
i only had a few seconds warning before someone crashed into me, full force, and wrapped their arms around me. i already knew who it was based on the short stature of the person and the tightness of the hug.
"hey, pina colada. what's up?"
claudia finally let me out of her embrace, but kept her hand in mine. we walked together to the covered gym on the opposite side of the pitch to join the rest of our team. training went by somewhat quickly and we finished off with a 7 v 7 match.
both me and claudia were on the same team; jona wanted us to work on pairing up to score goals since the performance at our last game resulted in three goals from us alone.
once everyone was sufficiently sweaty and tired, jona told us to have a shower and get changed because there was a meeting about our upcoming game he wanted to hold. we all traipsed back to the locker rooms, and as per normal, claudia and i were attached at the hip.
"okay everyone into the meeting room!"
again, all twenty-something people on the team filed into the room and found a seat in front of the screen that had been set up.
claudia found a seat at the front, however me being on the taller side - matching frido in height, chose to sit on the floor in between claudia's legs. i caught the eye of my older sister, alexia, when she cocked an eyebrow at my actions with a smirk.
she was always poking fun at how close me and claudia were, never telling me outright that she thought we should be together but always insinuating something was there.
i discreetly flipped her off and got comfortable. we were halfway through the meeting when i felt claudia's fingers take through my now-loose hair. she was almost giving me a scalp massage but i knew she just liked to play with it. i leant back, my head falling into her lap as she continued to play with my hair.
finally we were allowed out of the meeting and i stood up, feeling my joints crack in the process.
everyone filed out and dispersed, most going their own ways for the day. however i stayed with claudia, and alexia joined us. we went to my car, planning on going to mine and alexia's shared apartment. "i call shotgun!" claudia yelled out and took off towards the passenger side door.
alexia only laughed and shook her head, making her way to the backseats. "i swear you're at our house more than your own, pina."
i just laughed at my best friend and sister, unlocking the vehicle and hopping in the drivers seat. we all drove home - to mine and alexia's home, claudia playing her music through the aux. when i got through the door i found the couch and flopped on it, letting out a sigh of relief.
claudia insisted we all watch a movie together, then promptly snatched the remote so she could choose what we watched. neither ale nor i minded, we were just happy to be sitting down. me more happy to have claudia happy.
alexia said she'd get us some snacks from the mini kitchen we have and left me and claudia to set up in the connected lounge. i looked across to the shorter girl sitting next to me and couldn't help but admire her. she was so engrossed in scrolling through our netflix that she didn't notice my fixed gaze.
butterflies erupted in my stomach whenever she subconsciously bit her lip or grin at a movie or series she saw. i knew there was a desire to be more than friends, but the logic part of my brain refused to accept the wanting. i didn't like the idea of risking loosing what we had between us already. claudia turned to look at me with a contagious grin. "do you wanna watch this?"
i glanced at the tv, nodding in agreement even though i had no idea what she had picked. "sure why not." claudia whipped back to the screen with excitement and i just watched with a loving smile on my face.
it was then that ale walked back into the room with an armful of snacks, placing them on the table. she picked up on my expression and its direction towards claudia, again raising her eyebrow at me. i pretended to not have noticed and tried to get comfortable.
eventually i gave up and shuffled closer to claudia. she curled up and leant into me, my arm instinctively went around her shoulders. we watched the series like that, getting through about five episodes before it was getting closer to dinner.
again, alexia said she'd cook, but yelled out for my help after a bit. "hermana, why don't you tell pina how you feel?" she spoke out of nowhere. "i don't know what you mean, ale." i could feel the blush staining my cheeks and knew that alexia would pick it up.
"come on, y/n. i see the way you look at her. and you guys are attached at the hip. and she's literally sitting in our living room right now, probably going to stay the night." i opened my mouth to argue but didn't have anything to come back with.
"i guess i just don't want to risk loosing her. what if she doesn't like me? i'd rather live with her as my best friend and hide my feelings then loose her completely." alexia hummed as she took in my words and moved about the kitchen. when she'd finished dishing up whatever she'd made, she spoke.
"i know you don't like risks but i can see that she has something more than friendship with you too. you can see it in both of your eyes. just talk to her."
she passed me mine and claudia's plates and we went back out to the girl sitting on our couch. she happily took her serving from my hands, thanking both me and alexia for feeding her. "anytime, nene."
unsurprisingly, claudia stays the night. we both head to my room, where i can't stop thinking about what ale said earlier. i hand some pjs to claudia who gladly takes them and goes to the bathroom to change.
we end up lying in my bed, side by side, when i gather up the courage to speak. "pina colada?" "yea what's up?" i take a deep breath and sit up properly. "i like you. like a lot. more than a friend." it almost comes out like a stutter, in short bursts. there was some silence and me thinking that i totally blew it, i don't have my best friend anymore, when she sits up and turns to me with wide eyes.
"really? like for real?"
"yes for real. i like you for real claudia." using her first name meant it was serious. she looked a bit shocked but slowly a smile started to grow on her face. "i like you a lot too. more than a friend." the butterflies came back to my stomach in an instant as i took in her words.
"does that mean i can kiss you?" it was bold and it came out of nowhere but thankfully the awkward silence was short lived this time as claudia leaned forward to connect our lips first.
i kissed her back until we needed to break for air. then there was cheering from the doorway. "girls please use protection and don't be too loud. i would like to sleep tonight." alexia stood in the doorway to my room with a knowing smirk on her face directed towards me.
"ale!"
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can you please do an arsenal x young r where r gets an injury and has to get the green whistle. Steph is worried, Caitlin is filming and pissing herself laughing, Kyra is being supportive (r is a Tillie), Katie is writing stuff down and Alessia feels bad
Climbing Trees
Arsenal x Teen Reader
Word Count: 1,203
"Y/N! Get down from that tree!" You heard Steph yell; you looked down at her, "I can't! I made a bet with Lessi. I have to stay up here for an hour," you told her as you swung your legs back and forth and hummed.
"You're doing great kiddo! 30 more minutes!" Katie yelled at you, looking at her timer. "You cannot seriously be encouraging this McCabe," Katie shrugged.
"They were arguing nonstop this morning; I needed to somehow separate them, and Alessia can't even step over a bench without falling, so the safest option to climb the tree was Y/N."
"Hey!" Alessia said offended, although she was happy she wasn't the one up there.
"If you don't get off, I'm telling Tony and Sam!" You perked up at that; nah, Sam would forget after a day. Especially with Kristie being there to distract her now, and Tony was used to your nonsense.
"I'll tell Leah!" Now you were really listening. "Screw this," you mumbled, starting to climb down. You refused to lose your dinosaur nugget privileges again.
"Fuck!" You yelled as you slipped on one of the branches and fell. "See, that's what happens," you heard Caitlin say, and usually you would laugh it off, but this time you couldn't.
"Ow!" You yelled as you held your arm, "What happened?!" Steph rushed over to you, grabbing your shoulder. Once she saw your arm, she freaked out.
"Sam is going to kill me," Steph mumbled and glared at Caitlin, who was recording this moment. She grabbed a small rock that was near you and threw it at Caitlin, hitting her straight in the stomach.
Caitlin groaned as she held her stomach. "Stop being useless! Go get the medics!" She yelled, and Kyra and Less were quick to run and get the medics, dragging Caitlin with them.
They were back in under a minute, Kyra running with a green whistle in her hand. "They are coming; Gio had a little accident on the treadmill," Alessia said, and Steph groaned. Why right now?
You started sobbing now; this is when the girls knew it just got real. Right away, Katie dropped to her knees and stroked your hair. Kyra guided the whistle the medics gave her into your mouth, and Steph was on the phone with Leah.
"What the hell happened?" Everyone scurried away from you as Jonas came running with the medics. Steph glared at Katie, who started explaining the situation.
After a few minutes, your hand was wrapped, and you were giggly. Kyra smacked Caitlin's shoulder as a sign to start filming again, so she did.
"Stephyyy" you whined, sitting up, "yes?" She questioned, "How come Lessi could go on a date but I can't?" You whined, Alessia's smile dropped, and everyone turned to her.
"Russo went on a date." Katie smirked, pushing Less teasingly. "I have no idea what she's talking about," Less said in defense.
"Yes you did. Remember when you were supposed to be watching me, but you left me home alone to go to it, and you even brought me back a little piece of cake and gave me chocolate and told me not to tell anyone" You muttered the last part, starting to wonder if you were going crazy or not about the fact Less went on a date.
"I'm surprised Lessi was even able to talk to someone without tripping," you heard Leah say. You jumped up and looked around. "She's on the phone bones," Steph told you, handing you the phone. Kyra giggled at the new nickname.
"Leah!" You yelled happily, "Hey kiddo, how are you?" "My arm still hurts; can I ask you a question?" "Yes." "How come you're allowed to have so many girlfriends, but I can't even have one?"
Katie tried to hold in her laugh as Leah went silent for a bit. "What do you mean so many girlfriends?" Katie asked, and Leah muttered a little 'screw you' to her. "In the car, she's always on the phone with someone new, always flirting with them."
"You are a naughty girl Williamson," Caitlin said, wishing she could see Leah's reaction right now. Steph just wished the ambulance would hurry. Jonas demanded you'd be taken in an ambulance since he knew something would go wrong if the girls drove you to the hospital.
"I quite like her like this; what else do you know?" Katie asked you, and your eyes fell on Steph. "Steph-"
"Look at that! The ambulance is here; let's go."Steph quickly said, lifting you up, You waived bye to everyone with your good hand.
"Oh come on! She's my only entertainment," Kyra whined, chasing after the two of you. "Kyra! Don't let her take me!" You yelled, you noticed Less following you two, and you reached for her.
She grabbed your good hand and squeezed it. Steph put you on the stretcher. "I don't like this thing," you told them. "The hospital is close kid; you'll survive," Steph told you, sitting down.
"Lessi!" You yelled and reached out for her, but Steph pushed you back. "I'll see you at the hospital, I promise." Less reassured you, and that made you feel better.
Surprisingly, you behaved the whole trip to the hospital. Mostly whining about how the ambulance was unnecessary. Then you passed out from the drugs in your system.
When you woke up, you were surprised to see your arm in a cast. "Aw, I didn't get to choose my color." Steph jumped up upon hearing your voice. "Next time kid, trust me, you'll be here a lot now." You pouted at that.
"That's boring; I can still play football, right?" Steph shrugged. "I don't know; I mean, I'd let you; I don't know about Leah, though." Your heart dropped at her name.
"I'm dead." Steph smirked and nodded. "No one will be able to save you this time, not even Wally."
You always went running to Lia when you were in trouble; she always defended you and babied you the most. "Where's Lessi? She promised she would be here."
"Her and Katie went to get you food, your favorite; Kyra is at home making you a get well soon card; Caitlin is too busy showing the video to everyone; oh, and Alanna and Mac said that you have to work on your climbing more." You scowled at that.
"They act like they could do better." "I'm sure they can, and I can’t be joking around with you right now. Leah said, I have to be strict with you." You bursted out laughing. "You? Strict?"
"I'm serious kid. You have to stop listening to Katie; you're going to give me gray hairs. I can't have gray hairs for my wedding."
"Stephy, you're old; you have to accept your gray hairs," you told her, but quieted down at the glare you were receiving. "You know what? I can't do this tough thing. I'm leaving Leah to do this."
You did, in fact, get a yelling through FaceTime from Leah. Then you got another one from Sam, but that shut down quickly when you threatened to tell Kristie about Sam breaking her favorite vase. Sam blamed it on the cat.
#woso x reader#woso fanfics#woso#matildas#steph catley#caitlin foord#katie mccabe#alessia russo#kyra cooney cross#leah williamson#arsenal wfc#arsenal wfc x reader
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Part 5
Jonathan and Steve returned to the others and Robin immediately came up to them, eyes wide.
“What were you guys doing?”
“Nothing! What? Nothing!”, Steve said.
“Eddie just ran out like he saw a ghost”, Nancy said. “Or worse.”
“And none of you stopped him?”, Jonathan asked.
“We called his name and he kept going. He took off in his van”, Argyle said.
Steve and Jonathan shared a look. Neither of them wanted to believe Eddie ran out because he saw them kissing, but what other reason was there? It had all happened so fast. When Eddie had left the bathroom, that had left the two of them alone. It was the first time they’d been alone since that moment in the kitchen and well…
A dam broke.
Steve had felt a rush. It was never him being pushed up against a wall. He was usually the one pinning girls to something. Even now, as they were figuring out what to do about Eddie running off, he thought about Jonathan’s big hands on him.
Very quickly it was decided that wherever Eddie went, he shouldn’t be alone. They couldn’t let him just disappear into the night. Jonathan would take his car and look for him in one direction, Nancy would drive around with Robin in another. Steve and Argyle would stay in the house in case he came back.
The three of them left on their search and Steve was pacing around while Argyle sat on the couch.
“Any idea why he bolted?”, Argyle questioned while dipping a pretzel into the salsa.
“I don’t know”, Steve said, pausing for a moment as he looked out the window, then came over to the couch.
“You sure you don’t know?”
Steve rubbed his face and then sat next to Argyle. “I don’t know why…but I think…I think it has something to do with me and Jon kissing.”
“Why would Eddie high-tail it out of here just ‘cause you guys were kissing? That makes no sense, he’s one of us.”
“I don’t know”, Steve both shrugged and shook his head. He felt useless just sitting around here but he was really hoping Eddie turned right around and drove back here.
Argyle turned a little to angle his body more towards Steve. “Are you sure you don’t know?”
“Yes?” Steve wasn’t sure what he was implying.
“Why do you think Eddie might have a problem with you guys?”
“I don’t…I don’t know what you-”
“Oh I think you do, man”, Argyle cut him off. “But let’s table that for now and talk about you. I’m pretty good at reading folks. And you looked kinda guilty earlier. Now why would you feel guilty about kissing your boyfriend?”
Steve’s leg bounced. Argyle had been right but maybe he didn’t know quite how right he was. Steve had loved kissing Jonathan, had wanted more of it in fact. But when Eddie walked up on them he had felt…ashamed. And that feeling wasn’t because he was with a boy instead of a girl, it wasn’t even because he and Jonathan were lying to everyone.
It had just felt, well, it almost felt like he was cheating on Eddie. That line of thinking sounded crazy, so Steve shoved off the couch to start pacing again.
“If I feel guilty about anything it’s not being able to stop him before he ran off into the night. There could be anything out there!”
Jonathan kept his eyes peeled as he drove around. He ran a hand through his hair, worried about Eddie but also very much distracted at the lingering feel of Steve’s lips on his own. His little daydream stopped when he saw the van parked on the side of the road, lights off.
He parked behind it and checked the driver’s seat. No Eddie. Jonathan banged on the side of it, calling out to him. He heard movement inside as someone moved from the back to the front.
“Eddie!”, Jonathan shouted as he got back to the driver’s side window, seeing him right in the middle of starting the van.
“Leave me be, Byers.”
“Eddie, why did you run?”
Eddie leaned forward onto the wheel, hair draping over and covering his entire face. He was a little frustrated that he’d been found. But a greater, more traitorous side was actually happy that someone found him important enough to chase after. For good reasons, of course.
“Eddie…”, Jonathan looked off into the distance and saw a payphone. “Wait here.”
He went over to the booth and dialed Steve’s home. It got picked up immediately and Jonathan reported that he found Eddie and that he was safe. On the other end, Steve let out a sigh of relief.
“I’ll try and get him back to your place but”, Jonathan looked to the van. Eddie still hadn’t picked his head up from the wheel. “I think Eddie might need some space.”
“Don’t leave him alone, okay? If you go back to his place, stay with him. Or make sure Wayne is there”, Steve urged.
“Got it.”
They both hung up and Jonathan returned to the van, knocking on the passenger side this time. Eddie unlocked the door and let him in.
“I know you have this whole reputation for being weird”, Jonathan started. “But even this is out of the ordinary. Did you…did you see something?” He thought about his brother being possessed by the Mind Flayer, of Vecna’s visions, of Max being trapped in her own mind.
Eddie finally lifted his head but then he covered his face with his hands. “I saw something, sure. Wasn’t a monster or anything you’re probably imagining.” He let out a heavy sigh. “It’s late. Go back to Steve. I’m good to drive home.”
“Then why didn’t you?”, Jonathan asked. He knew that sometimes home wasn’t a place you wanted to go to. That sometimes the solitude of darkness was more comforting than a place with lights and four walls.
“Jonathan, you’re not a therapist, okay? Whatever problems I’ve got-”
“So you do have a problem?”
“Just drop it.”
“If it’s got you running away from your friends, I can’t. Now you can either get it out now or you can get interrogated by Nancy.” It was a bluff. Jonathan had no way of ensuring Nancy would talk to Eddie or even want to. But he figured the threat would be enough to get Eddie to spill something.
And it worked.
“You’re not gonna wanna hear it”, Eddie said. “I’m typically not in the business of ruining people’s happiness.”
Jonathan put on his seatbelt. They could get his car in the morning. But he wasn’t leaving him alone right now. The nights could be long. But whether they spent it in this car or went back to Steve’s, the morning would always come.
Part 7
Tag Team
@freddykicksasses
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Insufferable Arsehole Part 12: (When In Rome) : I'm Just Fine 'Cause I Know That You Are Mine
Series Masterlist
(11) I'd Rather Jump In Your Bones
Taglist: @scooby-doodoo @thereisaplaceintheheart @theoriginalwhatsername @eaglestar31 @thefrontofmymind @fallingforel @partoftheairforce @procrastinatinglikeapro @poisonmedaddy13 @xthe1975 @all-things-fic @jstbeeingme @rossgirly @juliardk @you-muppet @moodyyyychickx (add yourself using the link in my bio 😊)
a/n: hiiii, so i wrote the beginning of this chapter whilst listening to “Vacation Eyes” and “Summer In The Hamptons” by Jonas Brothers, it's cute, you should listen them it whilst reading :).... Also just a quick disclaimer: i do not know anything about George’s family including his dad, this was just all my imagination…. Okay now that's done, i hope you enjoy reading this, im so happy i managed to write a new chapter for this series i love so much, i love you - Lou
She dances around the living room of the villa, some old rock music plays from Matty's phone, they missed hearing it from a proper speaker but he didn't care. Not when she was clad in a pair of red lace panties and his shirt, all of the buttons undone. She'd spin and he'd get an eye full of skin, he could see the most intimate parts to her, covered by a single piece of fabric, one in which moved with her and allowed him moments of her.
He wondered when they had got here, completely unwavering in their love for each other, not scared or worried of being intimate with each other. It came so naturally now and he knew he would truly struggle without it, without her. He knew it would destroy him and he was extremely doubtful that he'd ever recover if he was to lose her. That thought sometimes creeps in, of what it would be like to lose her, although it happens less regularly now.
"You're beautiful love" he sits with a joint in-between his lips, hanging loosely as he talks. She spins as the last of the Italian sun which was setting, covers her form. It leaves him breathless, like someone had punched him in the chest, he had a sudden onslaught of emotions, flooding him. God he loved her, he knows now, more than anything, that he loves her, more than anything he's ever loved before, more than anyone. She was his everything. He would have never given up his dream that he was living, for anyone, but he would, for her, and them and their life together, their future. He wouldn't even see it as a sacrifice, more like an end of an era, one which allowed them to start their life together. He wonders if Adam wanted that for Carly and their baby, if he did, Matty understood why now.
He always felt like he was in this world alone, every force working against him instead of with him, always fighting his battles and those of the world, alone. But then there was her, taking his hand and helping him through all of it.
She steps towards him with a huge smile on her face and it's not long before she's draping herself over his thighs, legs resting horizontally against him, one hand hangs behind him, grasping the nape of his neck when she settles.
She easily takes the joint from his lips, weaving it into hers and he watches intently as she inhales. The joint is moved from her mouth and then she's exhaling the smoke into his which falls open easily, he inhales the smoke she lets out and they smile, in unison, before she weaves the end of the joint back into his lips. His mouth closes around it and she holds it as he inhales.
"You're beautiful love" she repeats his words back to him, removing the joint so she could press her mouth to his, she breathes in the smoke as they kiss, feeling high on the weed but also him. The Italian sun and air had done wonders for his curls, sitting in perfect corkscrews that would bounce slightly when she'd run her fingers through his hair. His eyes glistened with happiness and his skin glowed. Yeah. He was beautiful.
"Only you could find someone to sell you weed in Italy" she says as she pulls back. He takes the spliff from her, placing it on an ashtray and letting it burn. He pulls her tighter, pressing his mouth to her hair.
"I've got connections all over the world love" it makes her laugh, a loud, snorting kind of laugh, and it makes him laugh too.
"We've only got tomorrow left love, what do you want to do?" he asks and she shrugs, nuzzling into his chest and allowing him to hook his unused arm around her frame.
"I don't care Matty, as long as I'm with you" she confirms with a peck to his mouth, he doesn't let her move, keeping her there for a longer one.
"You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, you know that right?" she nods after he speaks and then he's smiling muttering "good" before kissing her again. She nuzzles back into his chest, eventually falling asleep there, with him humming a tune and the scent of weed drifting around the room.
The next day they go to the beach, her clad in a little bikini that Matty can't take his eyes off, him in a pair of black swimming trunks that barely hide him. They kiss in the water and they laugh, Matty grabs handfuls of her arse and she scolds him, reminding him that a very cute old picture (who have been taking photos of them unbeknownst to them) are watching them.
They remove themselves from the water when their skin starts to wrinkle. The old couple find them, and explain to the best of their ability that they thought their love was beautiful and that they took some pictures of them, that they wanted to send them to Matty and Lou. They agree. The pictures show up later that day, the couple look through them and smile, muttering I love you's to one another.
They leave the pictures on a coffee table and make love on the sofa. They're Interrupted by a loud knocking at their door. Matty’s been buried in-between her legs for what feels like a lifetime now, mouth glistening in her, pulling three orgasms from her from his mouth and tongue alone. He eventually leaves her, swearing as he walks to the door, she giggles when he doesn't even bother wiping her juices from his mouth.
He returns a few minutes later, burying himself back in-between her legs, making her moan loudly as his tongue flicks her clit.
"What did they want?" She asks through a moan.
"Just a noise complaint" his words are accompanied by the curling of his fingers, hitting her g-spot perfectly making her gasp at the feeling and his words. It's funny how he doesn't stop, delving in deeper, determined to make her cum again.
"Matty we should stop then..." she says through a particularly loud moan.
He pulls away then, looking at her with blown out eyes, his hair a mess on his head due to her hands attack, and his mouth, the one that's glistening in her, falls open.
"Love they should feel lucky to hear you like this... fucking gorgeous. I saw we should be louder" he gets a mean, mischievous look on his face and an even meaner smirk and then he's diving back in, pulling more noises from her, loud ones that she couldn't even silence if she tries.
"We're leaving tomorrow anyway" he says when he makes her cum with a scream. She pulls him up, wrapping her hand around his aching member. They make love and fuck for hours, by the end of the night, she's sore and aching but blissfully so, they've had sex everywhere they possibly could around the villa. Lou laughs into Mattys chest when she thinks about the people who have to clean the next day, blissfully unaware of what they'd gotten up to in their short stay
They return home the next day. Pictures tucked away in one of Matty's books. They walk through the airport hand in hand, truly in love.
❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁
Their tanned skin is covered in goosebumps as they arrive back in their hometown, the weather isn't too cold but is reasonably cooler than Rome. They leave the airport hand in hand and Matty shields her body with his larger frame, hiding her from the flashing cameras as they get into the car.
They had agreed that they'd go their separate ways today, Lou needing to see her dad and Matty wanted to see his mum and Louis. But tomorrow, Lou's dad was throwing a welcome home party and had invited all the guys and their parents. George's dad had also worked with Lou's to organise it, buying a large amount of alcohol (too much as always), ready to celebrate the fact they had returned home. So the car pulls up at her dad's new house, having moved back to Manchester a few years ago when Mia moved out of their home in London, and he quickly presses a kiss to her mouth before walking round to her side of the car, opening it for her, making her smile widely.
"Will you let me walk you to the door?" Matty asks and she giggles before nodding.
"you know my dad is going to see you right?" She asks and Matty nods, pulling her to his side.
"Figured briefly seeing him now would make tomorrow less awkward" Matty says with a kiss to her cheek and she finds herself agreeing.
They step into the threshold of her childhood home, hearing her dad rush to the door and swoop her into his arms making her giggle before he's putting her back down, eyes finding Matty’s. Her dad was the definition of a teddy bear, a big softie at heart despite his hard demeanour.
"Denise's son right?" He asks, extending his hand out to Matty.
"Yes sir" Matty says making her dad chuckle as they shake hands.
"None of that sir nonsense. Phil is just fine" he says and Matty nods.
"How are your parents? Always got along well with them" he says, ignoring the fact that he knew Matty made his daughter's childhood less than bearable.
"Good... I think. About to go home and see them now actually" Matty says, smiling as her dad nods, before his eyes flick back to his daughter.
"How was Rome pickle? Have a good time" her dad asks Lou, matty smiles at the nickname.
"Was beautiful, Dad" she says. "Well Matty... We'll see you tomorrow I hope" he says and Matty nods again.
"You will, I'm looking forward to it, as are my parents and Louis" he says before saying goodbye and pulling Lou into a tight hug. She pulls back and places a quick peck to his lips making him blush in front of her dad.
"I love you" she says, making his face soften (and her father's)
"I love you too" Matty says before he leaves their house.
"He truly makes you happy huh?" Her dad says as he hugs her tightly again.
"He does"
"Okay, say no more. We will ignore the fact he was horrible to you when you were younger. I will resist from beating him up" he jokes.
"As if you'd lay a hand on him" Lou heard a voice from behind them, one she recognised all too well, it was Mia.
"What the hell?" She says as Mia walks towards her, the two girls hugging each other tightly.
"Thought you were going to be in London" Lou says, her little sister shaking her head.
"Got to welcome you and the guys home don't I?" Mia says and Lou raises her eyebrows.
"Oh yeah... I'm sure it's not because you want to see a certain bassist" she says and Mia is quickly shushing her. Lou then proceeds to spend the rest of the morning with her dad and sister, leaving around noon to see her mum. The two women go shopping and catch up on everything they've missed, her mother wanting to hear everything there is to know about Matty. After the much needed catch up, Lou heads back to her dad's house, eating dinner before heading to bed, not before receiving a phone call from Matty. The two speak about their days despite knowing they'd see each other tomorrow. She falls asleep in the comfy bed, finally feeling back at home.
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The next day the house is slowly being swarmed by people, most of whom wanted to see Lou, pulling her into a tight hug before she's being tugged in another direction.Soon she's being thrown over someone's shoulder, recognising their voice immediately and the way they laugh as she giggles.
"Put me down you man baby" Lou says to the man who's holding her: George's dad. A nickname she had always called him because he was absolutely childish, one of the reasons she loved him.
"Seriously dad put Lou down" he hears George say, her head snapping upwards in the direction of the voice, eyes finding her best friend. They two of them smile at one another and soon she's put down onto the ground, George's dad hugging her tightly before she's pulled into the embrace of his mother, all before letting George pull her into his own arms.
"Missed you pumpkin" George says, despite it not being that long since they last saw one another
."It really hasn't been that long" she then hears from behind them, eyes finding Ross', who has her little sister tucked under his arm, holding her in a gentle but casual manner.
"As if you didn't miss me Macdonald" she says, his grip loosening on Mia, meeting her half way to hug her tightly.
"You're looking awfully cosy" she whispers into him, making him chuckle.
"It's good with you right?" Ross asks, the two not having spoken about the whole mia situation yet
"As long as you're happy" she says, she knew with Ross she didn't have to have the "don't hurt her or I'll kill you" speech, she just had to be supportive of the pair.
He pulls back to look at her, smiling widely at her before resuming his spot next to Mia, who smiles adoringly up at him as he holds her again.She's then pulled into a hug from Charli who she hadn't even realised was here, the pair jumping up and down at how excited they were to be with each other again.
"Pregnant woman coming through, need to see the little man's godmother please" she hears Carly say, people parting for her. Lou is quickly turning and running towards her, her arms wrapping round both Carly and Hann.
"The gangs back together then aye?" It's Matty who's speaking now, she didn't even know when he'd arrived but she'd recognise his voice (and scent) anywhere. He wears a plain white shirt which he’s rolled up, revealing his tanned arms, he adorns a black tie which she knows he will eventually loosen when it starts irritating him. He looks as good as ever.
"Guys it's really not been that long'' Ross says making everyone laugh "and since when have you decided who's going to be godparents?" Everyone is laughing again at Ross' words.
"You didn't know?" Matty jokes, eyes finding Lou's again and the both smile at each other. The group talk before they disperse, talking amongst themselves or moving to speak to others.Matty loses track of Lou as he's speaking with her dad. He eventually finds her in the garden, his own mother's arm wrapped around her small frame, the two women laughing about something.
"Well look at you two" Matty says, Denise pulling him into a hug before letting him go, of course he doesn't move away too far, scooping Lou into his side, his mother smiling at the sight.
"I'll leave you to it. Lou, I'll text you about that lunch, yes?" She asks and Lou nods. Denise leaves with a kiss to Lou’s cheek and then Matty’s, the later squirming and lightly pushing her away, making the older woman chuckle and roll her eyes at his girlfriend.
"planning lunch with my mother? Wow you must really like me" Matty says, pulling her into his arms so they're facing each other.
"I must really love you" she emphasised the love part, making him blush. Her smile is one of the most genuine ones he's seen, perhaps it's because she's surrounded by everyone she loves, everyone wanting a piece of her (if not just a quick hug), or perhaps it's because of him.
"Hmm... You must really love me" he says and she nods as she leans up to press her mouth to his for a quick peck.
"Missed you" he says, despite the fact they had only been apart for a day. She felt it too though, she spent the whole day yesterday turning her head expecting to see Matty, to tell him something she thought of, but of course he wasn't there.
"Missed you too" she admits, closing the gap between them and kissing him again.
"Oi Healy stop necking someone who's far too good for you" they hear behind them making them both turn. They see Matty's younger brother Louis walking towards them and Lou almost gasps as he pulls her into a hug.
"What the fuck louis! You're like an adult now" Lou exclaims, making all three laugh."It's good to see you, looking amazing as ever" Louis says, he was always a little flirt, even when they were younger. She doesn't miss the look Matty gives him before he's shoving him lightly.
"Watch it" Matty warns before the two of them are jokingly fighting each other. She feels someone wrap an arm around her shoulder, looking at the person, revealing her mum.
"That's your boyfriend huh?" She says, the two women laughing before Lou smiles at the curly haired man.
"Yeah... What am I thinking aye?" She laughs. Lou and her mum spoke quite a lot during the tour and she told her mum everything Matty did to show her his true intentions and feelings. It was safe to say her mother liked him and he had redeemed himself.
Lou coughs drawing Matty's attention towards them, he instantly snaps away from his brother.
"I am so sorry" he says but Lou's mum just laughs before pulling him into a hug.
"Nice to see you again Matthew. You've grown up a lot since you used to torture my daughter" she jokes but Matty frowns at her words.
"She's joking babe" Lou says, making the worry wipe from his face.
"Lou's told me all about the wonderful things you've done for her... So I say the past is the past and... Thank you for making my daughter happy" she says, pulling him into another hug. The four of them talk, the Healy boys talking about their respective lives, Lou watching and listening proudly.
Eventually all the parents find their way inside, leaving their 'children' outside with one another reminiscent of the old days.
Lou is sat next to Matty, clung to his side with her legs hooked over his lap, hand clasped on her inner thigh, the man thankful that the dress had a high slit.
Ross was sitting with Mia, his arm hooked around the back of her chair as her hand was placed in his lap, gently holding each other, their situation very new.
Carly was hooked under Adams arm, hands holding each other over her bump.Charli was sat in a similar way to Lou: legs hooked over George, head resting against his shoulder as his hand held hers in her lap.Louis was the only one on his own, not that he minded, he was sat near Hann and Carly talking to the couple about all things baby.
"Didn't tell you how beautiful you look tonight love" Matty says, his voice hushed keeping the conversation private. She's dressed in a brown midi summer dress, dipping at her waist before hugging the curves of her hips, the slit high on one side of her leg, revealing a large portion of her thigh.
"Thank you" she says simply with a chaste kiss pressed against his mouth. “You look good” she says, making him smirk.
"Can't believe you're my girl" he says, shaking his head at his words "so lucky"
"So am I Healy" she says, and she can't help but kiss him again, not breaking away from each other until they hear George shout an "oi oi" like they were kids again.
"Oh my god, let's play truth or dare!" George then says and everyone either laughs or groans."Mate we're not 15 anymore!" Hann says and they all laugh again
."Oh come on, don't be boring! We're back in our hometown... Let's act like kids again" George says and his words somehow persuade the group to agree.
"In that case..." Lou says, grabbing her bag from the floor and collecting something from it, Matty chuckling as he sees what she's holding: two blunts.
"This might help things" she says, making everyone cheer, even Carly, who although she can't smoke the substance is fully supporting everyone else.
"Oh god... I remember the first time you guys made me smoke weed and I was sick all over George’s garden" Hann says, making everyone laugh.
"Wasn't that the night you got with Freddie West?" George says, pointing at Lou. Freddie was a guy two years above everyone else, someone who all the girls fancied and someone who Matty despised, it was truly the only reason she got with him. She hears Matty groan behind her as she lights the blunt, passing the other to George for him to light it, sharing his with Mia, Ross and Charli.
"Yeah..." Lou says, chuckling to herself at the memory.
"Fucking hated that guy" Matty says next to her and she looks at him as she inhales, before threading the end through his own lips.
"I only got with him to piss you off" she says, loud enough for everyone to hear. Matty coughs at the confession making everyone laugh loudly. Matty's eyes find Mia knowing she'd know the truth.
"Yeah she told me that... Said he was an awful kisser with a tiny dick" Mia said and she hears George laugh loudly before Ross is laughing along. Matty smirks next to her.
"Oh really?" Matty says and Lou rolls her eyes.
"Alright... You got with Melanie that night so you can't say shit" she says making everyone groan at the memory
."Didn't she try to suck you off in front of like basically everyone" Ross says and his eyes find George, the pair laughing loudly as they remember what happened next, Matty groans and his hand comes to cover his face.
"And then she gagged and was sick on my dick yes everyone fucking knows" Matty says making everyone laugh loudly.
"Never thought I'd hear my brother say that" Louis says, everyone's laughter increasing tenfold.
"We're not even playing Truth or dare yet and you guys are telling all the goss" Charli said, the group continued to smoke the weed, each of them feeling it more than usual due to how much they were laughing.
"Alright alright..." George says, everyone finally managing to stop laughing "Lou, truth or dare" he says and she smirks at the man
."Truth" "boring," Ross says, making everyone laugh again.
"What's the most amount of orgasms you've had in one night?" Charli says, making Lou laugh as George groans next to her.
"Stop being a baby, we're literally playing this with Lou and Mattys siblings you can deal with hearing about this" Charli slapping her boyfriends chest lightly.
"6" Lou confirms, everyone gasping at that, making her shrug, Matty smirking next to her as everyone cheered.
"Think it was more than that don't you love' Matty mumbles into her ear making her blush.
"Fucking hell you guys are feral" George says.
"Alright George, truth or dare" Matty says, eyes never leaving his best mates.
"Dare" he confirms.
"Swap clothes with Charli" he says and the whole group laughs as they do. "Truth or dare Ross" Louis says and the bearded man thinks for a moment.
"fuck it. Dare" he says and Louis smirks, his eyes find Lou's who nods.
"Dare you to kiss mia" and Louis, Matty and Lou all smirk as the pair look at one another, Ross swallowing, seemingly nervous.
"You two planned this somehow" Ross says before he focuses on mia.
His hand finds her jaw, holding her gently, he smiles down at her as she nods, letting him know it was okay, he gently presses his mouth to hers, making everyone cheer for the pair of them.
"I'm going to kill you" mia says to Lou making her laugh and mouth a
"thank me later"
They continue the game until it's Matty's turn to be asked. He opts for truth and Hann speaks up, surprising everyone with his words
"Did you ever think about Lou when having sex with someone else?"
Everyone oooos at that and Matty stares at her, squeezing the hand that was on her thigh.
"Oh all the time" he confesses, brutally honest, which makes everyone laugh but Lou can't help but press her mouth to his, making out for a minute or two everyone cheering, even George who was too high to care now.
"I love you so much" she laughs against his mouth, mainly because George had started to make fake retching noises, Matty throws a middle finger up at his mate and they all begin laughing as Matty kisses her again.
"I love you too darling" he says, pecking her lips once more before pulling away.
The game of truth or dare is forgotten and the group all begin talking about different things, like how the tour is starting soon and how they were all excited to be on the road together again.
Matty sits, watching his friends and his girlfriend. He knows, in that moment, that this is the happiest he's ever been, with her and his friends, the people who were his family now.
He couldn't wait for the day he could introduce her as his wife and maybe this family would have a few kids running around, their kids. Yeah... he knows he wants that. More than anything.
He loves her. Truly loves her. She was his everything.
#insufferable arsehole matty healy series#matty healy x oc#matty the 1975#matty healy#matty healy fanfic#matty healy fanfiction#matty healy fic#matty healy fluff#matty healy imagine#matty healy smut#matty healy x reader#the 1975 fanfic#the 1975 fic#the 1975 fluff#george daniel#ross macdonald#adam hann
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Can you do Nico asking Y/N to a Devils advent even when they are friends
You were sitting with Amanda and Catherine waiting for the guys to come out and start practice. They were chatting about what they planned on wearing to the gala for the Devils Youth Foundation while you played with your camera.
“What are you wearing y/n?” The gala was fairytale themed and you hadn’t even thought about finding a dress even though the event was less than a month away.
“I uh, haven’t really thought about it.” You say as Vitek comes down the hallway. You take a couple pictures of him as he says hello to the three of you before getting on the ice.
“You haven’t bought a dress yet?” Catherine looks at you in shock. “You’ve got like three weeks!”
“I know.” You respond as more of the guys walk past you. “I’ll find something.”
“Do you have a date at least?” Amanda asks as Nico and Jonas walk past you.
“No, I’ll probably go alone.” Nico stumbles as he gets on the ice and the boys start chirping him. You turn to look at him, making sure he’s okay before continuing with your conversation.
“I don’t really have anyone to ask.” Your hectic job schedule makes it a little hard for you to meet people, let alone maintain a relationship.
You don’t end up staying during the entire practice, you take a bunch of pictures and then head to your office to edit.
Two hours later, Nico drops into the empty chair beside you. The day before, Dougie taped a sign to the chair that reads ‘Assistant Ham’ and Nico frowns at it.
“Hi.” You laugh as he peels the tape off the sign and removes it from the chair.
“Hi Y/n.” He smiles at you before turning his attention back to the piece of paper in his hand. “Can I borrow a pen?”
You hand him a pen and watch as he scribbles ‘Nico’s chair’ on the back of the paper before taping it back to the chair. “Is that why you came in here?” You grin as you turn your attention back to your computer.
“No. I uh…” He trails off and adjusts his SnapBack on his head. “I heard you say you didn’t have a date to the gala earlier.”
You turn your head so fast you almost get a kink in your neck. “You heard that?”
“I also don’t have a date.” His cheeks are a little flushed as he finally makes eye contact with you. “Would you want to go with me?”
You open your mouth to respond but no words come out. Nico wants to go with you? As in a date? You thought the two of you were just friends. Could you be more?
“As friends of course.” Nico adds as you try to find your voice.
“Oh, yeah, friends.” You nod as embarrassment sets in. You really thought Nico would want to take you as a date? “That sounds fun, sure.” You force yourself to smile at him.
“Great.” He smiles back at you. “Just let me know what color your dress is and I’ll get a tie.” He says as he stands up.
“Okay I will.” You wave to him as he heads for the door.
“See you later, y/n.”
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