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unbearableblog · 2 days

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To my birthday. I wish myself to one day be loved like that. Based on a dream

Dream Dish

“Can you explain it a little more?”

“So, the outside was covered in dried cranberries and blueberries, but the inside was like… grass? I don’t know…”

“Grass? Sounds delicious,” he laughs.

“Shut up.”

Carmen listened intentively and moved away his curls as you described the dream you had, a certain dish that you tried there.

“Ugh, it was so weird? Like, I don’t think I’ve ever encountered this grass before. It was like hay, but green? And the outside of the dessert was like a fortune cookie, but brown?” you sigh in frustration, unable to describe its complexity in full, until an idea appears in your head. You quickly stand up and blurt out - “I’ll show you!”

You run to get the pencils and paper, leaving Carmen to sit amused on the bed. He knew waking up with you would be an adventure, but not in this way. Either way, he liked it.

“Here!” You put the paper down and frantically drew shapes and coloured them in, making the dream a reality.

“So! This is what it looks like.”

You paused from your driven spurt and realized that Carmen hasn’t said a word. He was silently looking at the paper.

“Sorry, this must be really boring to hear,” you suddenly shut down. After all, it was you who tried that magical dish, not him.

He looks up at you, then down at the paper. “No- …no, it’s a fascinating dish. I’m just tryna understand how it works,“ he still sounds kinda sleepy.

"It's okay, Carm, you don't have to."

Several days have passed and you moved on. You didn’t want to abandon your friends after getting a boyfriend, so today was one of the nights when you met up for a chat. When you came back, the apartment felt warmer and had a fruity scent - Carmen must have tried something for the restaurant.

You take your heels off and tiptoe to the kitchen, curious. He hasn’t heard you come in, so he is still hunched over the counter. Your eyes shifted to the table - and you wondered whether you were awake.

“Carmen? What’s that?”

“Shit!” he jumps, at which you chuckle, “when’d you come back?”

“Right now,” you say hesitantly, “why, was I not supposed to?”

“Of course not,” he comes to hug you. His arms are on your waist, and you know he can still smell your perfume. “I just wanted to surprise you,” he releases you and turns to the table.

You recognize the dish.

“Is that-”

“Yes, baby, that’s your dish,” he smiles and looks kinda proud.

“Can I try it?” you ask, and he reaches down to take the plate and a spoon. You break the cookie in half, inspect the filling, and eat it. As you chew, the insanity of the situation grows on you. This is a made-up dish. From your dream. You’re eating it.

“I-I’m sorry, I couldn’t find the exact grass you were talkin’ about, I had to switch it out with-”

“It’s okay, Carm, I’m sure that if it existed you would have found it,” you put the plate down and your hands slide to his arms, “It’s amazing. It didn’t taste nearly as good in the dream,”

“It is pretty good, isn’t it?” he takes the other half of the cookie and eats it too.

“Hey, that’s mine!”

”I made it.”

“I came up with it.”

He doesn’t respond, just smiles at you. You look him in the eyes and think how happy you are.

“I love you,” he whispers and gives you a kiss.

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thebeartv · 5 hours

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THE BEAR Season 3 out on June 27th

#the bear #thebearedit #the bear fx #the bear hulu #jeremyallenwhiteedit #carmy #s3 #cinematv #dailyflicks #tvarchive #tvedit #filmtvtoday #userreh #userallisyn #useraurore #useriselin #nessa007 #usergal #*

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yannaryartside · 3 days

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CARMY NEVER WANTED TO CREATE A MENU WITH SYD.

AND WHY THAT IS THE CORE THEME OF THE SHOW

PART 1: THE LIE THAT CARMY BELIEVES

So, one of the bases of creating an efficient character arc is to give the character something they want, and something they need. In the pursuit of getting what they want, the theme of the show and obstacles will show them what they need. Most of the time, they need healing from an emotional wound that prevents them from growing into the ultimate version of themselves, capable of winning the challenges of the story. I will try to explore Carmy's wound and, more importantly, the lie that created that wound.

In 'The negative trait thesaurus" by Angela Ackerman and Becca Puglisi, it reads:

"Wounds are often kept secret from others because embedded within them is the lie-an untruth that the character believes about himself."

When I started therapy (disclaimer: this is not professional advice; I am just talking from how I interpreted all of this), I was introduced to the concept of "limiting beliefs:" lies we have told ourselves about our own nature or the nature of the world. The most difficult beliefs to leave behind are those established in our early childhoods, and we told ourselves those lies to make sense of the world, to make peace with realities we were not equipped to comprehend yet.

Some examples of lies people belive:

"I am too stupid to learn anything; my teacher said so" "It was my fault that I was molested." "I am a bad person for wanting a different life."

When people believe these lies, they will act accordingly, maybe attracting situations that hurt them but keeping the lie active in their lives. They may self-sabotage or create bonds with people who also believe the lie, even if it doesn't seem this way.

In some cases, people may develop complete personalities or behaviors to prove the lie wrong, but deep down, they still believe in the lie. Carmy falls into this last category. This is where we find the most contradictory parts of his personality, how he can act shy and insecure in some instances and appear confident and even aggressive in others.

Long post underneath.

THE RESENT OF A MOTHER:

We can only assume here because I think Storer is gonna let us know more about this soon, but I think I got an idea of this wound when I saw the only moment Carmy was alone with Donna on "Fishes."

I have a lot of things to say about Donna herself, but let's begin with the obvious: the conversation in this scene had little to do with the dinner itself. This was a woman stating that she felt alone and not valued, probably due to being abandoned by her husband and having to overwork herself at the beef to support her 3 kids, all while being a single mother. We don't know if this feeling of abandonment is something she has carried since childhood, but in the state of current womanhood, it wouldn't be uncommon. The work of women (especially mothers), particularly the emotional labor, is rather invisible and not valued at all.

But again, this is something she has used as fuel to resent her kids, who, at the end of the day, didn't ask to be here. Her anger has to go somewhere since she cannot direct it toward the people that ctually caused it. To get to the point:

THE BEARZATTO SYBLING DYNAMIC

Carmy said, "You are not alone; I am here with you." (This kind of comes back to telling Syd she was not alone at the end of the season.) This scene is about a kid trying to communicate to his mother that he loves her and trying desperately to connect with her, to get her to express her affection for him as well.

It tells me that growing up, he felt like he had to "earn" her affection. Donna likes to make her kids feel guilty about her unhappiness, so the kids feel that they are constantly walking on shells because they think their mother hates them, or at least that she resents them and that it is their responsibility to fix it.

In the scene, Carmy asked,

"What is so hard, Mom?"

I think what he was actually asking is, "What is so hard about being with us, to love us? What did we do to you that made you resent us this way?" He is asking because he wants to know, to finally understand. Why do you drink, Mom? Why do you yell? Why do you say such hurtful things?

When she answers, "Nobody makes things beautiful for me," you can see in his face the disconnection. He knows he can't do anything about that.

Then, a crucial part in the scene occurs when Donna calls him "Michael, " which indicates that the only one of her children who could make her feel happy was Michael, or at least that is how the other two kids felt. You can see the hurt in Carmy's eyes in the scene because this answer dismisses his effort to connect to his mother in his own right. She asks him to just leave. He offers to wait to connect with her. Then, it comes to the most chilling moment on the scene, the "we have a problem" using his full name, with resentment in every word. She hugs him while crying, kisses him, and then slaps him.

This is rejection. There is a book called "The Five Wounds of the Soul": wich are Rejection, Abandonment, Humiliation, Betrayal, and Injustice. I think Carmy's wound is rejection, for never earning his mother's love, particularly comparing himself to Michael.

Michael took responsibility for the Beef, finally giving their mom a break. It was Michael's job to make sure everyone was having a good time, to compensate for the discomfort that caused being in Donna's presence, to make sure all of them stayed as a family, which was Donna's intention, so Michael thought he had to make that happen for her. Therefore, Michael is the only one of her kids who succeeds and makes her happy. We know Donna rejects Natalie and Carmy. About Natalie, we can write another whole essay.

THE LIE THAT CARMY BELIVES

According to this scene, I think Carmy thinks that her mother didn't love him because he is not Michael; in fact, he is the most "not like Michael" someone could be. He was shy and stuttered and didn't have friends or girlfriends, comparable to Michael's ability to control every room he was in. Carmy was sensible and no macho alfa as Michael presented himself to be. Carmy left home and the family business, and both Michael and Donna expressed that they feel like he thinks he is better than them. Michael admitted later to admiring Carmy's work in Copenhagen, but Donna never did. carmy grew up having to live with the crumbles of Donna's attention that Michael left behind, wondering every day what was so wrong with him that made her reject him, and wondering what he could do to change that.

The lie that Carmy belives, could be sumarize this way:

I need to earn people's love. I need to always go the extra mile, doing the most possible at all times to earn people's love.

This all goes back to his trauma with Michael. It goes back to his career as a chef and how he became the best. He didn't need to succeed on a larger scale in the culinary industry to earn Michael's respect and love; he needed to be the best in the world, so he did that. He judges his own social abilities, comparing them to Miachae's. He left that promising career only because of Michae's death. He got the girlfriend Michael wanted for him (not saying it was the only reason, but it was there).

PART 2: WHAT DOES ALL OF THIS HAD TO DO WITH SYDNEY?

Well, what does a person who feels they always need to do the most? They do the most. I want to bring you back to the moments Carmy had to develop menu ideas with Syd on s1 and s2.

When Syd suggested items for the menu in s1, he gave her an inconclusive, not enthusiastic "maybe."

When she had to actually cook the thing for him to approve, he tried to make her feel small about it. He felt the need to remind her that she was "impatient and green," according to her previous bosses. He commented about her possibly ruining the flow by using time to cook her recipe. Yikes all around, but the core here is that he was treating her like an enemy, like competition, while she was trying to save the restaurant with what they had on hand to use the most efficient solution.

Then, when Carmy tries the dish and feels stunned by it, he has to make an ambiguous excuse on the fly and just finishes every chance of them using the recipe by saying, "is not ready yet"

And what does he do next? He goes to show the crew a recipe that is extremely complicated for the level they are operating at currently—they said so themselves. I think the recipe is a variation of Donna's butter chicken recipe. To put a nail on that coffin of his intentions to earn her love and approval at the end of it all.

But why does he do all this? Because he needs to be the hero, subconsciously, he is still that small kid begging for acceptance and love; he must go the extra mile. He cannot accept Sydney's help and partnership, because that will take away from him earning what he wants on his own merit.

In S2, he seems unenthusiastic about starting the menu in the first place. Then Claire comes along, and he tries to make it work with Syd and the menu, but I think he subconsciously thanks the universe for not having to go to his core wound. That is what self-sabotage is. That is why he bailed on the food tour with Syd, using such a stupid excuse as helping somebody else move out and never mentioning it again. He never asked her what she liked or what ideas she thought of. For most of the creative process, Syd is alone, working on her own creative crisis. The menu ends up being like two recipes they made in collaboration and then all of his family's traditional recipes. It is two of Syd's recipes and the rest of Carmy's. Then, desserts Marcus did on his own. The collaboration was superficial at best.

All of this creates the core theme of the show. The Bear was once a chaotic place (like their childhood home) that needs to evolve into an efficient, peaceful place built on love, support, and mutual collaboration like a functional family should be. Sydney is the member of this found family that forces Carmy to confront his core wound and learn he can actually be good enough while still accepting help. Therapy probably will play an important part in this theme, alongside with Carmy learning there was nothing wrong with him in the first place, that earning your parent's love is not something a kid can do.

Thankyou for reading. Gif and images are not mine.

#sydcarmy #the bear meta #sydney adamu #carmy berzatto #carmen berzatto #the bear fx #the bear #sydney x carmy #carmy the bear #carmy x sydney #the bear hulu #donna berzatto #michael berzatto #natalie berzatto

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thecapricunt1616 · 2 days

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Hello all I’m still working on my requests daddy Carmy has just been taking over my fucking brain.

I’ve been seeing the trend on tik tok of wives asking their husbands questions about their babies it just got me thinking how Carmy would KILL this challenge and he would be super proud of himself because he’s so competitive I think it would go something like (Drabble below)

You walk out onto the patio of your gorge house where he’s in sexy daddy mode cooking breakfast on the little black stone grill while he drinks his coffee and you’re like -

“Babe I saw this video about this dad he didn’t know anything about his baby but I know you know cause you’re an awesome dad can we show the people what a good dad you are?”

and ofc he gets all blushy and is like “I’m not a good dad because I know stuff about my kid but I love talkin’ bout’ em so you can ask me questions sure.”

So you start off easy “What kind of formula do we use for cub when I’m taking a break?”

He answers straight away “Yellow one Enfamil neuropro I’m like 99% sure it’s in a yellow container”

“Correct and how many naps does he take a day?” You ask and He chuckles

“Uhm well when he’s bein’ good he’ll take 2 er 3 even if he’s doin’ a lot ‘er he’s sick, but we can usually only get one outta him.” He said while shaping the pancake batter into little Mickey Mouse shapes

“He gets being a bad sleeper from his dad, and what time does he usually nap?”

“Ye’ but he gets the attitude from you. We try gettin’ ‘em down at 12:30ish 1 but he usually fights us and he doesn’t go down until 2” he teased

“What brand and size diaper do we use?” You panned the camera down as he sprinkled blueberries on top of the batter

“Huggies - you like the snug and dry ones - he likes the snug and dry ones cause the box has Mickey on it- and he’s size 4 I think - ye’ 4 now cause the 3’s were lookin uncomfortable - are you filming my hands?”

You laughed, blushing a bit having been caught “sorry you have nice hands, how does he like to be held?” You moved the camera back up

“Uhhh depends? Is he tired is he upset is heee-“ he questioned

“Mm puttin him down f’bed” you said

“Ohh lil’ man likes the football hold” he demonstrates “likes to be all curled up here in my arm like a football and I’ll give ‘em his bottle. But w’you he wants t’fall asleep eating” he said and you smiled big at how attentive he was

“You got an A, I knew you would” you said and he grinned proudly

“That was it? Cmon! Those are easy gimme harder questions then that!” He chuckled

“Hmmm… alright-“ you think for a moment “oh! What’s his favorite movie”

“Monsters inc and monsters university” he said without missing a beat “he goes nuts he loves it he makes us do scary feet with ‘em” he laughs a bit at the thought

“Also correct, what abouttt…his favorite-“ he cuts you off

“Animal? A Bear” he smirks and you both laugh

“Okay what makes him laugh every time?” You asked

“Ohhh hmmmm…” he thinks with a big grin “well there’s a lot- oh well I’m gonna get you that always makes him crack up, also coughin’ if anyone coughs kid is done for” you giggle

“Which is why he is always wakin’ up laughin’ when you cough up a lung in the middle of the night after coming in after a cigarette” you teased and he laughed a bit

“Id rather him wake up laughin’ then cryin it’s easier to go in there and read to em till he falls asleep” he said

“Oh! That’s a good one- what’s his favorite book?” You ask

“Brown bear brown bear what do you see” he smiled “or Goldie locks, but he likes it better when you read that one to him” he said and you heard him squealing over in his playpen happily

“See he agrees doncha little bear?” He coo’d adorably over at him as he bounced up and down

“Dada dada dada dada” he babbled happily and lifted his arms, golden curls like Carmys of course falling over his forehead.

Of course carmen couldn’t deny his little guy so he walked over, picking him up and holding him on his hip and came over to resume cooking

“ you win this challenge bear you crushed it” you told him and your son is just so smitten and happy, cuddling up to Carmy and sucking on his pacifier contently

You post the video ofc it goes viral bc he’s Carmen but also becomes dilf of the year all the ladies in the comments simping over his sexy muscley arms and his tattoos and his ability to hold a baby and flip pancakes at the same time, everyone’s heart melting at the end of the video when your son pointed at the pancakes and went “mi-tee” and Carmy smiling telling him “you’re right cub! Such a smart little man. That’s Mickey Mouse. We gonna watch Mickey house while we have breakfast mm? With mommy?”

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private85 · 3 days

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hotcinnamonsunset · 4 hours

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THE BEAR - season three trailer

#the bear #thebearedit #the bear fx #carmy berzatto #carmy the bear #season 3!!!!!#SBedits

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chefkids · 2 hours

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Ziggy time.

They only gave us a teaser because what is ahead for Carmy is really going to test all of our patience and endurance. He is about to be put through so much suffering that we are not even prepared for. From going Michelin mode to his failationship to his mother to letting down Syd. This dude is going to struggle.

#the bear #carmen berzatto #sydcarmy #the bear fx #the tortured chefs department #the bear meta #the bear season 3

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adamsacklerdriver · 5 hours

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season 3 and he’s at the kitchen at 3 am he’s insane

#carmen berzatto #carmen carmy berzatto #carmy berzatto #the bear #the bear fx #the bear hulu #the bear show #the bear season 3 #the bear s3 #jeremy allen white

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thoughtfulchaos773 · 5 hours

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#I mean #we could be getting the eleventh madison Park carmy #but he stops in the middle of the activity to look at the camera.#Almost like he's still aware of the cycle he's putting himself through. breakijg the fourth wall so to speak #just in case you cant open instagram #the bear season 3 #the bear fx #june 27th #the bear #sydcarmy

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the-bluespirit · 4 months

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AYO EDEBIRI wins for Best Performance in a Television Series – Musical or Comedy for The Bear (FX / Hulu) as Sydney Adamu

#ayo edebiri #the bear #the bear fx #sydney adamu #golden globes #golden globes 2024 #award show #award shows #award season #gifs #*#gg 2024 #2024 golden globes

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bedknees · 3 months

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#the bear #the bear fx #jeremy allen white #carmen berzatto #carmy berzatto #ebon moss bachrach #richie jerimovich #willy wonka #read it in richie's voice and everything lmaooo #twitter #1k #2k #3k #4k #5k #10k

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louisbxne · 4 months

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THE BEAR wins the Best Comedy Series Award

75th Emmy Awards (January 15, 2024)

ayo's face😭

#the bear #the bear fx #the bear cast #matty matheson #ebon moss bachrach #ayo edebiri #jeremy allen white #emmys 2024 #emmys #75th emmys #award show #popularcultures #userpcultures #mlm #lgbtq #emmys24

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windrixville · 9 months

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#the bear #the bear fx #snoopy #my edit

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yannaryartside · 6 hours

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View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Ayo Edebiri (@ayoedebiri)

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Teaser!!!!!!

Oh so we are really going to be inside his head this season!

I am gonna pass out

They didn’t need to do us like that with his eyes

The blue light??!!!! Hello???? He still in the freezer guys, he is still in the freezer

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thecapricunt1616 · 2 days

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Im sick in the head another Carmy drabble in one day

Another Dad!Carmy Drabble bc I’m sick in the head and can’t stop thinking abt him. So imagine him going to his baby’s school for career day 😭🫶 he would be so so proud of his work bc his baby would be just GUSHING over him and I need this out of my drafts SRRY ppl who have sent requests this has been rottingggg (more below)

Okay so firstly your daughter would excitedly wait on the porch of your house for him every day when she knew he would be home from work. She is a daddy’s girl from day one because ofc she is (Carmy spoils her rotten and physically can’t tell her no so you’re always the bad guy unless her safety is involved ofc) she could give an eff about whatever your career is because she grew up in the restaurant like Carmy did, so when they were told at school there would be a career day when you picked her up she proudly took the sign up sheet from her bag, and was like

“Mommy, daddy is gonna come to my school to talk about ‘The Bear’ isn’t that cool!!”

And naturally this is the first you’re hearing of this so you’re like “he is?!” And she shoves the paper in your hand and points to the date

“See mommy! And he has to sign off and- and I want him to make cannolis for my class! Teacher said yes, and he has to mommy!”

You’re just like ‘oh! Alright honey well daddy is very busy we’ve talked about this yes? We will ask him if he can’

So Carmy gets home, she’s on the porch - charged. She’s vibrating with excitement. He gets out of the car and she sprints up to him, giggling happily and squealing

“Papa Bear! Papa Bear!! Papa Bear!!!” The name she only used when she was buttering him up for something.

He laughs, picking her up and swinging her around, kissing all over her face and throwing her in the air in the way you’d usually scold since it scared the living shit out of you - but in her 8 years he hasn’t dropped her— yet so it was acceptable sometimes.

“My baby bear” he said happily and rests her on his hip “how was school, what did you learn today mm?” He holds his backpack on his shoulder as he carries her inside.

“I learneeedd” she shows him the paper “that we’re having career day and you have to come! Please daddy please daddy plllleeeeeaaasseee!!!” She begs puckering her lips for a kiss to further sweeten her deal.

He smiled a bit, giving her a tiny sweet peck “yes my little love, I’ll come f’r y’career day, of course sweet angel girl. When is it hmm?” He carried her in the kitchen where you were at the stove, cooking Mac and cheese to go along with the chicken tenders that were air frying

“Mommy!!! Daddy says yes!! Okay daddy- so you need to make cannolis for my class cause they’ll think it’s so cool” she said happily and points at the paper “look may 24 mommy says that’s 23 days away, and daddy you can make cannolis for us - and - and I can do my chocolate chip chef job daddy!!! I can help you, I'll help!!” She said excitedly to which he beams with love and pride.

“Thas’right princess you can be my sous chef y’remember what that means mm?” He questions, rubbing her little back with a smile

“I’m second best!!! I’m second best to daddy in the kitchen. I’ll be first some day though daddy” she kisses his cheek sweetly and hugs him tight to which he pouts adorably, looking over at you with big blue eyes

“Thas’my smart girl” he says softly and kisses her head. “You will be baby. You’ll be the best ever. I know it. You’ll change the whole world with your cookin’ mmm?” He rests his cheek on her head sweetly, resting against the counter while they cuddled.

You could barely stop the tears that gathered in your eyes. Seeing your husband and your daughter like this was something you didn’t think you’d ever get over.

From the very first day they’d met, even when she was all - frankly yucky, and slimey after she was just birthed - Carmy didn’t mind the nasty cottage cheese like muck that covered her skin just minutes after delivery as she laid on your chest, easily finding your nipple to latch so soon after being born, still in the delivery room— as if she was the smartest baby to exist.

He still kissed her head. Even with the nasty, cheesy vernix covering her skin, he gently massaged it into her back as she ate for the first time, sniffling at the sounds of her little huffs of breath against your swollen breast. “You did so good baby. Look at her-“ he rasped, his voice watery and loving. “She’s perfect” he said, rubbing the pad of his thumb over her little shoulders.

“I’ll be the best at The Bear someday daddy” she promised and hugged him tightly “I love you” she mumbled happily He cradled her as if she was still a little baby, kissing her face and swallowing back choked sniffles and sobs “I love you little bear- s’much” he whispered, so grateful and over the moon his little girl took such pride in what he does.

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