Well, I guess you didn't have much of a choice either

Assorted Tumbleweed facts and thoughts incoming

- Prior game and during act one, he was a pretty heavy sleeper. Would need multiple efforts from multiple people to get him up in the morning. Easiest way to wake him was to send Scratch on a wake up mission, effective, but not always the most pleasant.

After act 2 started, sleep got more difficult, and he'd spend more nights in Gale (or Astarion's) tent for comfort and company. Every terrible event that happens left a scar on his psyche, and he would be haunted by terrible dreams and flashbacks. He pretends to be unphased most of the time not to worry the others, but those closest to him know how much of a toll it is for him. Having the semi-regular nightly dream visitor didn't really help either, especially knowing it affected everyone else too.

- He wouldn't define himself as a sceptic or even agnostic, but he has a hard time believing gods are real. Maybe it's some sort of detail, a way of blocking it out, or even wrap his head around. He has, however, no hard time believing that people believe, or even believing the belivers he know. But it's still such a alien concept to him. Facing gods and having to deal with them up front and perosnal still leaves him in a bit of doubt, but doesn't quite know what to make out of it. It boggles his mind, but he tries to be respectful and engage in other's beliefs. There might be a good dose of denial, but it's not something he's conscious about. He still wants every god to stay away from his friends, and of he could, he'd kill them all. But that's mostly spite and ambition talking.

- He's dealt with druids in his past, but it's not a pleasant chapter in his life, which makes him wary of any other druids they encounter. A blind moment of revenge sweeped over him as he killed the druid ringleader in the Grove. It's something he both regret and also feel was justified. The consequences following still haunt him daily, though. He doesn't talk much about that incident, even less his past. He's not secretive on purpose, and he doesn't want to hide things from the others since he trust them and them him. It's more a repressed cluster of memories he shoves away at any time he's reminded. Which is surprisingly a lot, especially looking in the mirror.

He did come to accept both Halsin and Jaheira as individuals, managing to seperate them from 'other' druids. He was still on guard having them around, but managed to see them as both wise and capable people. If they'd both live a bit longer, his trust might have been gained, but inevitable things happen, and he carries that with him as well as every other burden on his shoulders.

- He thinks that pain can only hurt and wound, and is deserved as punishment. Up until they explored the goblin lair and found this worshipper of pain. Only then he consented to a round of wall torture becuase he genuinely thought he deserved punishment for fucking up the Grove. A lot of guilt and grief and heavy thoughts plagued him, so he thought why not get that beat out of him. In retrospect found the experience quite healing and enlightening. Consensual pain can be pleasurable, and also something that can be done for fun.

It sorta contradicts the deal he has with Astarion. But their deal is more based on the terms that "I will not let you starve" and "you deserve better blood than awful rats and enemies we encounter." And most of all, trust. It still hurts every time he feeds on him, but the sensation is somewhat addictive and makes him forget about the world for a bit. Then he can go back to a dreamless sleep, facing the consequences of blood loss the day after. At first, he also saw the condition of being bloodless as fitting punishment for all the bad things he's done, but over time he let that slip and just accepted it as a part of their relationship.

so like life sucks right so im trying to pluck my face and i stumbled upon bounprem stuff even tho i've been watching like nothing or drumming videos (i lied... know why, cos i keep clicking on fanmade mvs for winteamidk why bc i hate watching them but they give me info in extremely close amounts of time)

ANYWAY

con: is boun rich? if so, shame

pro: everything else. i ESPECIALLLLLLLY like how they want to work behind the camera!!!!!!! it seems like that was boun's goal all along which really excites me as a ~filmmakeur~ and i like that prem may try it too. i laughed when he didnt know what a slate was but he didn't know about production and he's a green actor so i can believe that but he shouldnt sell himself short cos being an actor can give you a lot of insight into the behind the scenes work. it also makes u appreciate us more :)

this makes me want to hug my friends lmao i havent seen or touched friends and i'm fucking single and im high alone GOD WHY!!!!

anyway my point was that im high and love them and i hope they do art >:)

lastly, i hope they are friends forever they have great chemistry and their true actual care for e/o. i was thinking about how i don't ship people but i enjoy seeing good relationships esp in this context. bl is really devoid of a lot of shit but i think what's the best thing about seeing two people who share a space and are being looked at is the chemistry of how that dynamic works as co-workers and, hopefully, close friends. that's why pretend camraderie is important when doing (dumb) press-circuits (so people can make ze $)

it's always nice to see natural chemistry or people learning their rship or even people who may not be close after shooting (in any context, but here in particularly) but find themselves as older casual friends to catch up with. since this genre is so heavily focused on blurring those lines or whatever when things start getting weird (like from exposure and lack of good skilsl of acting and/or care or whatever idk im high) or they have shitty rships in between them for whatever reason u can immediately tell

so like oh your chemistry is real ! on top of that for some it's like oh real and ur playing characters that are falling in love. idk what im saying it's just reaally exciting to meeee u have a perosn with u supporting u thru the same process u r. also with two people there's always going to be someone who picks up not...slack but is more into a leadership type position (i hate using this word) but somoene you rely on if you arent the type to want to take care of eveyrthing—a lot of friends and couples do it (i do with my best friends. literally i'll be quiet and let them do things im too embarrassed to do but im still insanely forceful and i will play that role for them if needed) so bounprem have that in their natures and boun being older and slightly mroe mature (or i would say again different natures who knows)

it's the same type of joy you get and excitement you feel when ensemble casts truly like each other and it's ~natural energie~ (like in my engineer the whole feel of it i'm just like omg u guys are FRIENDS fijshoufija theyre so cute; hope theyre all okay) it also shows that you have someone/people you trust and having fun on set is really important. filming should be fun. a lot of times i don't like finishing shows because if the chemistry is good for the cast i feel like empty, like im leaving the set. that's a really good feeling tho!!!

anyway i think a big part of it (im still trying to articulate myself) is the fact that they dont have to be real but have the capacity to be and can set the limits of their rship but it's really nice to have a really influential set of people who want the best for you and vice versa esp if someone knows u more intimately in a capacity many people may not experience/understand because of ur job (IE showing as ~lovers~ but being friends irl even tho uve been very intimate for simulation and artistic value. this is based on a specific set of principles btw i'm not including sex work here bc it's also very different and a job in a different way but it doesnt make it lesseer than anything. all jobs suck tho)

ALSO I realize how easily their personalities fit winteam not in a 'they dont have to try" way cos they do and should. they're ok actors and the more u do and learn etc but the chemistry tests they probably had with them probably solidified that even though they are very diff than their characters. being an insanely good swimmer from jump gives the watcher the impression of probably perfectionism, a bit of torment, perhaps dumb jock syndrome, and having to be insanely good; for win the tattoos are an instant signifier instantly (if u c them) cos it's always like ~ooh what's the story~* lmao

alright, here we go; long post coming up y’all

(sorry for any errors, or for too much repetition. i am incredibly tired today)

tdlr; bakugou is angry and deserves love and patience

the name thing is what bothers me the very most about fanon bakugou. he frequently calls people by insults, but even lately in canon has shown to use them less and less, and with people he personally knows, or someone who’s being a dick

and for someone who has so much trouble opening up and developing close relationships in the first place, why the hell would he ever choose to call an s/o by these names? it’s an abusive behavior to do that; i know it’s fictional but could you imagine if your boyfriend called you a ‘fucking dumbass’? ‘endearingly’ or not, i just don’t see how some people could characterize bakugou like that and find it appealing

about showing respect by using names, notice how he hardly calls midoriya anything other than ‘damn deku’, but has rarely slung dumbass or idiot into the mix. he also would never adress his teachers or idols by those things, even though we all know he’s got enough balls and anger to

granted, he doesn’t spare this courtesy with his friends, but speaking realistically i think i say bitch and whore more times a day when talking to my friends than i do their names. i think platonically, with the right context, bond, and tone you can certainly use names like this to show affection. but never to hurt them with

bakugou is definitely incredibly insecure, which of course we saw in the deku vs kacchan 2 fight when all might broke them up. he’s just a messed up kid with a warped perception of reality (which we’ll go more into on in the next part) a lot that goes into making bakugou the personality he is on fanon is this in the works, and yet it’s completely ignored and excused as an extremely confident dude who shows affection through violence and insults/threats. like, what? you can’t play that off as ‘haha he means well’ like no, no. any perosn with an inkling of sense knows you don’t act like that to people you care about

going off of him being insecure, you’d have to have to be forceful with him to get him to open up, as well as showing him a little bit of tlc because it’s not like literally anyone has ever offered that to him. deku has definitely tried to be close with him, but i don’t think he’s going as deep as he should and to no fault of his; his history with bakugou and bakugous feelings of inferiority prevent that from happening on his end. i don’t think bakugou would be able to be vulnerable to somebody unless they opened up to him first, and had written a reliable history with him. he’s someone who could stand to learn by example

still yet though, a lot of what i see with him on the other side of fanon (him not, y’know, basically being abusive) is that he’s a mellowed out fellow, doesn’t let things bother him, is super sweet. even without everything making him him the way that he is, that’s still his personality. even if he were to overcome all of his issues, that doesn’t mean his entire personality would change. he’s certainly aware of how he presents himself, and how people shy away from him, but as of currently where the anime left off (i’m not caught up on the manga) is okay with that. he focuses on his goals to distract himself from those matters weighing down on him but i think in the future as he had more time to bond with others he’d definitely try to make an effort to change, and from that point is where i tend to write him from. he can still be brash, confident, and teasing all while showing kindness to others, it’s just gonna take time

mitsuki is, if you ask me, the root of his problems. for real. mitsuki literally criticizes him for the way he handles being kidnapped, makes him feel guilty for it, treats him as if he should have been able to solve everything in his own, shouldn’t have been there in the first place if he was really strong enough, and reinforces this idea in him that a hero should be able to work completely alone. she gives him the idea that needing help or asking for help is weak and he should be ashamed for ‘inconveniecing’ everyone, despite him literally being her 15 year old son kidnapped by the most notorious and dangerous group of villains in the country

that’s not tough love, that is emotional abuse. mitsuki and bakugou’s relationship is more than them both simply being rough around the edges, she sets out to degrade him and knock him down every time he shows an ounce of confidence. it is extremely toxic, and caused him to develop this inferiority complex that we see (only to be amplified by the one person he could confidently assert himself over becoming the all powerful successor to his idol)

if she would have showed him a little bit of weakness, a little bit of the motherly love expected of her, i don’t think he’d be nearly as insecure as he is now. his flashy quirk would still play into his personality, what with adults fawning over him and saying he should be a hero (seen in the beginning of the series) but i think more than anything it would be a not so intense fear of failure. if he had his own mother backing him up, it wouldn’t be nearly as bad

mitsuki has lead him to believe that unless he’s the best and achieves his goal without any help whatsoever, that he should be disappointed, pitied, and seen as a loser

finally touching the lighter side of things, bakugou would be absolutely hilarious the first time he ever committed himself to a relationship. he’s genuinely never been interested in it, and the few crushes he’s had were completely ignored to fulfill his goals. so far we’ve established that he’s insecure, feels inferior, and has trouble expressing his emotions unless the right person caters to him patiently. there is absolutely NO way that he could go into a relationship confidently, he’d be completely flustered and nervous as hell. i think bakugou is definitely the type to play into cliche romance standards all while pretending he’s too cool to care, and it’s whimsical to say the least

all he cares about is being a hero, so unless someone willing to work with him slowly and show him kindness latches into him and cracks him open, i don’t see him starting a relationship in high school. he wouldn’t be concerned with those matters until he’s finally settled down into a routine work life, and even then wouldn’t be able to develop a good romantic relationship with someone he wasn’t already friends with

as for pda, his flashy show off style and embarrassed ‘never dated anyone and is terrified’ ordeal would clash and leave him wanting to be able to indulge in pda, but far too flustered to go through with it. he’ll hold hand with you, yeah, maybe leave a hand on your waist when you’re idle, but a kiss is taking it outside of his comfort zone. once he’s adapted and overcome these, he’s all over it though. so long as it doesn’t get gross, you know?

i think he would mimic his parents in one sense, that being banter. he’d argue with his s/o, but not in the aggressive manner you’d expect; more so, arguments are a way to exercise his mind and keep him entertained? so i think he’d need an s/o who can keep up with him and playfully bounce back and forth with him over useless things. he’d never take it to the point of anyone being hurt or actually angry, although there would be a couple times he’d lose his temper over something and start an ACTUAL argument that has the potential to escalate. after doing this once or twice though i think he’d work extensively on keeping his cool and having a peaceful albeit tense discussion

otherwise though, i don’t think he wants to be anything like them, and consciously works toward providing a relationship for his s/o much much different from theirs, once that’s open and nurturing

so sorry for the repeated thoughts and spelling mistakes, but those are my thoughts! feel free to add on anymore or elaborate on what’s here so far, and thank you for sending these in babe 😍

everyone in one of my fandoms is talking about writing letters to your ten year old self. mine feels wrong to post anywhere else so i guess i’ll put it here.

dear aubrey,

hi! i hope i’m finding you in good spirits. things are still okay in your brain for a little while longer so that’s good. i hate to take away from that. i’m from the future so... i know exactly what happens next. i know what’s happening to you now. you pretend everything is normal for the sake of your sanity, don’t you? everything with dad, you’ve numbed yourself to it because you think it will save you. if you pretend it’s normal it won’t hurt as bad. even though you’ve seen what real parents are like and he’s not like that. and even though you feel sick when you go over there. even though you’re one step up from having selective mutism because of how terrified you are of people. it’s just easier to be okay right now. i wish that someone would’ve helped you then. when it was still “okay.” i wish they would’ve noticed.

i want to tell that it gets better. i want to so badly but i can’t lie to you. i don’t lie anymore. i know you do a lot right now because it makes you feel safe. but it’s just because that’s what he taught you. to lie to protect yourself. to lie to speed up the punishment so you can go back to pretending. one day you’ll realize that’s not who you want to be. so i can’t tell you it gets better because it doesn’t. not really. you’ll move next year and at first it’ll seem okay but then you’ll lose everything. you get hurt. bad. and people start to live in your head. you lose your old friends. dancing. your mom. school becomes your enemy and you pull out all your hair to cope with the realization that nothing has been okay. not once in your life has anything been okay. pretending doesn’t help anymore.

there are some good things. you make new friends somehow. i don’t know how. they seem to like you enough despite you being so not there, so not real, so far gone. jacie is your favorite for a while. she reminds you of something nice. like when things weren’t so bad between you and your family, laughing at the dinner table. when your mom could look you in the eye. she reminds you of safe places. you don’t trust her though. or anyone. you wait for them to leave. it takes a few years. you also meet milo. you don’t know it yet but they’re very important. try to pay closer attention to them, yeah? i wish i had. you also spend a lot of time on the roof. you look at the stars and talk to the moon. you still want to jump off most of the time, but those moments are nice sometimes. being alone with the stars.

things get harder when you move. your mom remarries and you’re so far gone. so so so far gone. i’m so sorry. too far gone to stop what’s coming. i wish i could’ve saved us. i’m sorry. things get really ugly after that. your fort wayne friends disappear. you beg them not too but they’re busy with high school and you’re busy disintegrating. you’re busy turning invisible. you get a crush on a girl who lives far away. she isn’t worth it. but it helps you to realize you’re not into boys at all- no newt from the maze runner does not count. she breaks your heart. you lose more friends. your mom doesn’t talk to you anymore. her husband tortures you every day. nat is too young. you can’t save her either. i couldn’t save her either. i’m so sorry. everything gets so heavy and you’re so tired. and no one notices. no cares that you’re limping. no sees how your hair is reduced to nothing. no one notices that you stare into emptiness and you’re so far gone. too far gone. you start a countdown to something worse than what you’ve done to your legs. you save up pills. you think it’ll be better for everyone if you finally end it. jacie finds out. they send you away. you break.

you see your friends again when you get out. they still love you for some reason. milo makes your heart freak out. you ignore that part for another year or so. you really shouldn’t.

things don’t get better but you see a therapist and she helps you understand yourself better. you fall in love. it’ll feel like forever. it isn’t. but you’ll fall for it anyway. you fall in love again, you learn that you can love more than one perosn so easily. it’s natural to you. this second person is worse. you should run away. you won’t though. she’ll hurt you. you get really good at sex though. congrats. you still have scars from what she did. there are worse to come.

2018 is a good year in some ways and not in others. you realize you’ve fallen hard for milo - told you they were important! now that, that is forever. it’s gonna be hard to trust that. but you should. you really should. and hold their hand more often. i promise they don’t mind.

you get dumped for the first time that august. it’ll fucking suck but you’ll be okay. what comes next is worse. your first love breaks your heart. truly breaks it. it still hurts even a year later. you’ll try to be normal but it’s not. you escape from your moms house but it’s not better. i wish it was. i wish things could’ve gone differently. you get to see milo a lot though. they hurt you sometimes but they don’t mean it. you work through it together. you’ve been hurt before and they’ve been hurt before and it makes things hard. but not impossible. they remind you that being alive isn’t a bad thing. they make the pain less.

2020 goes nothing like you dreamed. no prom, no graduation, but honestly for good reason. everything outside of your head falls apart for once. it’s fucking horrible. things are still messy even as i write this. but for you things do start to improve. milo stays. even when you think they’re gonna go away. even when they could. they come back. you trust them. i know, i can’t believe it either. it terrifies me. but it’s nice. you let them into your head. they don’t know everything, but you trust them with more than you do with anyone else. you think maybe that’s enough.

you’re on a meds now. they don’t fix everything but you’re learning to want to live and that’s soemthing you never did before. you don’t know what you want to do but maybe that’s okay for right now. you’ve spent 19 years with nothing. so you’re learning to build. you’re learning to start.

so no, things don’t get better. i don’t know for myself if it was worth it, all that pain. i know that i can’t save you from it even when i want to. the past is beyond our control. but things... they’re on their way to okay. and i think that we deserve that. i think that if i could actually write this to you, my younger self, i would want to tell you that you deserve that. to really be okay. no more pretending. and, despite it all, we’re strong as hell now. we don’t take anyone’s shit and we’re learning to advocate for ourself. we’re learning what love is. it’d be beautiful if it hadn’t started with so much horrific shit.

i wish you all the best. give lil nat and gwen some hugs for me. also you’re gay as fuck. don’t pretend to like boys. it’s okay.

love,

aubrey from the future

Headcanons about maddiman's wife:

* name: Joy Nocturne

* her personality is like your classic 'overbearing wife' or 'loud woman' except its not a bad thing and i hate how its always stereotyped as a bad thing. She's confident and outspoken and badass and these are all the things that made Madds fall in love with her. Its also the things that makes everyone else think she's 'such a nag' and start rumours that their marriage is on the rocks, because he 'must be so whipped', etc. And back when they met in highschool everone thought she was a 'typical american thug' who was 'being a bad influence to that poor honor student'. Basically she's used to people hating her personality and she was already secretly doubting whether her husband also found her annoying/bossy/unattractive cos of this. Like she's usually able to be confident in the face of hate from strangers but as she grew to love this man she felt her old insecurities coming back. They were both having trouble talking about their feelings and worrying that their spouse didnt love them...

* oh and BIGGEST HEADCANON: she very much loved him and there was no villain of this story, just a sad tale of two people falling apart due to miscommunication. I think its infinately sadder if they were total soulmates and never stopped loving each other even after this tragic falling out. I feel like Joy just had to make the decision that was right for her son when her husband was never around to be part of his life. And with the way maddiman acted she had every reason to feel like he'd stopped loving her...she didnt leave because she hated him but because she didnt know why he was so distant and thought he hated her...

* She never remarried. She did manage to live a full life and raise their son to be an upstanding human being, but she never forgot about madds and never found anyone she loved more than him.

* She was actually there when he died. The point where he passed out midway through writing a diary entry wasnt actually the exact moment he died, his coworkers found his comatose body and rushed him into surgery. He was on life support for a few days befofe he faded away, having never woken up. Joy rushed over on the fastest flight possible to get to see him before it was too late, but she only managed to arrive in time to see his yokai self emerging and vanishing into the ether. This phantasm haunted her for the rest of her life and she sorta inherited his fatal yokai obsession, in hopes that what she saw was real...

* after her son died at just 17, she became even more tied to the desperate hope of her husband's old fairytales. Ultimately though, she was never able to find him. She actually could have walked straight past him and not been able to see him. And madds wouldnt have recognised her, only wondered why something in his heart says that this particular trespasser in the haunted hospital should be guided to the exit without harm.

* they first met in high school, oddly enough due to maddiman's dad being a massive asshole. Nogut always pressured his son to be perfect and live out all his dreams for him, blablabla, gotta get to the best schools and never get a single bad grade. Joy and madds werent in the same class so they hadnt talked much, and she only recently transferred anyway. But one day Nogut was in school for a parent teacher conference and he was being his usual pissy entitled self, blah blah im too important to be here and my son is the cause of all my problems somehow. So he got uhh.. "Distracted". Aka being an absolute fuckin creeper to underage highschool girls! Thus the day Joy first became friends with maddiman was also the day she became mortal enemies with his dad by kicking him in the balls. And shortly afterwards she bumped into maddiman who was hyperventilating in the same closet she coincidentally picked while hiding from Groinally Harmed Anger Dad. He was having a panic attack from the general stress of his dad being here, and she helped support him through it which became a really valued memory of his, and why he sees her as his hero. Well, that and shortly after when she was like 'lol i just met this total creeper and kneed him in the nads' 'THATS MY DAD' 'geez sorry dude' 'NO THATS AMAZING'

* she also helped him pull off his ultimate escape from trash dad. They had a plan in place for a long time that as soon as he turned 18 they were getting on a motorbike and riding off to Anywhere But Here. But he didnt expect her to literally bring a birthday cake and throw it in his dad's face! And then that was the beginning of their relationship. Madds had totally been crushing on her for quite a while but never knew how to confess, until the sheer awesomeness of that moment made him accidentally squeak it out while they were riding for their lives from an angry old man.

* oh and also there were probably a lot of funny cute clueless moments where it kept going over joy's head that he had a crush on her? I was thinking of a cute idea for a valentines day flashback where maddiman was too shy to give her a box of chocolates and she comes along like "man i didnt get any chocolates im glad you managed to get some!" "U-uhh no i umm..wanted to give them to someone but i...didnt." "Oh that sucks dude! At least now you can eat them all to yourself to help forget that girl. Lemme sneak one, tho!" And thus he ended up sharing the box of chocolates with the perosn he wanted to, even if she had no idea. And it was a very good day!

* also i think considering the pattern of him bottling up his feelings and running from relationship problems, it seems likely that he ran from the altar on his wedding day. But it was also one of the only times ever that that happened and it wasnt super sad. As he does, he got all worked up into a mess of anxiety and convinced he knew the only answer- the stupidest and most reckless answer! So even though he loved this woman he was so scared that he'd be a bad husband that he tried to jump out the window at the last second without even once trying to actually talk to her about any of this. But this time she did manage to find him! All the friends and family were like 'ugh leave him, he doesnt love you', but she knew there had to be more to it so she ran out in the rain in her wedding dress and searched for miles until she found him sobbing in a public bathroom. They managed to talk it out and get to the bottom of his feelings and actually resolved something for once, and it all went okay. It kinda helped that seeing her turn up all bedraggled in the wreckage of the dress she loved so much, bleeding from her tight heels and fighting off several biker gangs along the way helped convince him that "hey maybe she thinks i'm worth fighting for, so i should try and believe her". So yeah then she swept him off his feet and they danced all night as everyone else in the church was all "ugh she looks awful" and "why would she take him back", but the moment was so magical that they just didnt care. And thats how the biggest failure of a wedding was also the happiest day of their lives! (..though sadly the same doubts and communication difficulties would come up again and not be resolved so easily...)

* i keep flip flopping on what career i want to give her, but at the moment im thinking possibly owns a lil bakery/coffee shop type place? Madds is one of those people who cant stand the bitterness of tea/coffee and prefers caffinated sodas instead, but he used to drink strong coffee every day back when he was human just because his wife made it. He loved all the rest of her cooking so itd be cruel to say no! Its a lil detail that i figured would be cute but also foreshadow how he'd meet his tragic end, as it shows he's capable of bottling up his feelings for years even when talking would be so much easier. Also probably a comedic note that he's coming up with nonsensical mad science techniques to make himself able to drink coffee! "Shall i genetically modify my tastebuds or create an undetectable translucent plastic armour plate for my tongue?"

* also maybe she could make cinnamon rolls shaped like madds's doofy cyclops head when they reunite in the future. Just because i want to eat that.

When you really think about it, the whole pro-religion argument of “What’s stopping you from committing murder/rape?” doesn’t work.

Humans are social animals. It isn’t in our nature to hurt each other. We see so many stories that suggest otherwise, but the most important thing to remember is that we hear about those thing because it isn’t the norm.

The people who rape and murder are monsters who think that they are better, superior to the victim. Don’t misunderstand, though. Self defense is a valid reason to murder someone. Protecting yourself is important, and if you accidentally end someone’s life because you stopped them from ending yours, that’s hero work. Because, you survived, not the person who has the ability to see themself as superior enough to other people that they deserve to die.

Good people outnumber murderers and rapists. There are so many people who have never even considered murder or rape. There are even more people who had those thoughts, intrusive and dangerous, and chose not to do any of it, because they were strong enough not to listen to intrusive thoughts. There are so many people.

7.753 billion people.

7,753,000,000 people.

There could be a billion murderers and rapists, and they would still be outnumbered. I can’t live my life believing the worst of humans. I love humans, I trust them. Of course, I’m cautious, but I fundamentally want to see other people smile when I talk to them. I believe in people, I believe that there are so many good people in the world, I truly believe that good people are real and really exist.

Why is the argument “What’s stopping you from murder/rape if you don’t believe in God?” so weak, then?

Because there are billions of people who don’t commit murder or rape, but don’t believe in God. There are billions of people across history who didn’t believe in God, or maybe they believed in multiple gods, and they didn’t murder or rape a single perosn in their entire lifetime. Billions of people lived to the end of their life without committing heinous crimes.

Think of all the Greek and Roman people who weren’t Christian. Even if they were polytheistic, all evidence points to their gods being massive fuck-ups who would encourage murder, not discourage it. Yet, they didn’t do that. Pretty sure Zeus himself spouts the merits of murder, yet people didn’t murder. Gods weren’t what stopped them.

Human beings are, and always will be, social creatures. There’s so much evidence, too much evidence, the most obvious evidence.

Donesticated dogs around the entire world, because different groups of people, without any contact with each other, saw giant fluffy creatures that could murder them, and they focused on the fluffy part. They sat more giant, fluffy creatures that could murder them in cats, and they also focused more on the fluffy part. People see giant sharks, literal murderous creatures that are not fluffy, yet still want to show affection because their brain says that sharks could be friends.

Whenever I read novels about someone begging for help and others turning them away, I don’t believe that that would really happen. Look at the Underground Railroad. Those people weren’t being held at gunpoint to help people. Those people chose to help because they saw that they could. There was no glory in doing this. It’s likely that we don’t even know how many people harbored what the government saw as criminals. Look at people who let strangers into their homes, just to live there. Some of these are free of charge. There are people who will open the door and see that the one there is distressed, and they’ll take them in.

Human nature is not to hurt. Human nature is to nurture each other, keep each other happy. That’s why people want to make friends with introverts, that’s why introverts allow themselves to be made the friend of extroverts, people love each other. There doesn’t need to be romance or sex for it to be love, people are inherently designed to love people.

We don’t need a God to tell us that hurting the people we love is bad: that’s pure science. Humans, like other animals, have ways of telling other humans that they need help. Crying, disassociating, anything you do when you’re sad or angry is a distress signal to other humans. And those other humans respond, there will always be other humans who respond, even if they’re thousands of miles away and can only talk to you over the internet.

Humans are good. Humans are kind. There are over 7,000,000,000 humans; the good will always outnumber the bad. There is no way to change ny mind, because any number that suggests otherwise will be a lie. Humans are good.