#im trans masc to a certain degree but not a man | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dykefever · 10 months

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wolfstar tumblr has started again to claim that we shouldn’t describe sirius as short and feminine because it’s “heteronormative”, that we shouldn’t describe remus as tall and masculine because it’s, you know, un-canon (a terf’s?). it feels like terfs are coming to the fandom and we are going back to the time back then when popular writers who turned out terfs were dominating the fandom. seems the fandom is adopting the old terfs’ claims again and even shamelessly applauding it. how are you bearing these days, laura. as for me as a trans person who hates jkr and her holy “canon”, it’s horrible. feel like everything the few good people (such as you) in the fandom had tried was vain. sorry for disturbing you.

well it's been about three or so months since i last made a post about this stuff so sounds about right that more terfy posts are coming out all surrounding height discourse. it's a cycle in the r/s fandom and im afraid these terfs and transphobes aren't coming to the fandom they've all probably been here a while because this fandom is rife with them due to the source material and general politics of the people that write the fic (liberals who are so totally for gender neutral bathrooms but transwomen make them obviously uncomfortable irl)

i've already talked a bit about how harmful and also dumb this line of thinking is re: short and fem s so i'll link this post on gender essentialism i made but i'll say again it's just so tedious how it's often the same people who don't seem to inspect where their assumptions are coming from. people stick terfs dni in their bio and perhaps disagree with the openly transphobic lawmakers but that doesn't mean their biases against trans people don't exist. transphobia is far more insidious than that!

like people seem to go: short s -> s is "whiny" and "annoying" -> he's feminine (whether he actually is or not) -> thus he's being written like he's a girl and that's bad because that's heteronormative

the media heuristic that exists that "whiny" and "weaker" men (ie. complaining, relying on their boyfriend/partner for things, idk being the fucking little spoon) are women-coded does not mean you shouldn't make any character whiny or annoying or whatever because then you are essentially making them a woman and that's Bad -- the response is to unpack the very idea that there are certain traits connected to men and women and when applied to people of the opposite or other genders somehow still has a connection to an innate gender of 'man' or 'woman'.

also, s characterisation is varied but not as prolifically dramatic and bad as people seem to say. they're latching on to the 'feminine short s characterisation' where he acts dramatic as if i have not ready many a fic where he is tall and stereotypical masculine with similar personality traits. however, these traits are viewed differently when packaged differently. the difference is s wearing a skirt or being perceived as feminine in a way that they do not view as aligned with their perception of how gender should operate.

whether intentionally transphobic or not, the shorthand people use in these discussion always ties in with this belief that there are innate gendered characterisitics that if acted out in certain relationships makes them heteronormative. i am afraid that's not how queer relationships work! they are still gay even if one of them is short and the other tall and one is fem and the other masc like? you can dislike certain relationship dynamics but that doesn't make them inherently problematic or homophobic or anything. i avoid plenty of r/s fic because it's not how i personally view them. i don't try and morally justify my dislike because i don't like how they wrote r i just click out. as for saying one thing is canon and another is not like idgaf whatever!! most of canon is quite horrible and problematic and of course we are all engaging with it to some degree but to use it to argue something as meaningless as height should be adhered to. well i'm scrolling away frankly.

idk people are always telling on themselves in these discussions and you can pretty much always track one degree of separation between them and a pretty outward terf. i block and unfollow a lot of people but at the end of the day i engage with far less content than i used to because it sucks seeing so much transphobic and often anti-queer discussion. it's exhausting and it's why so many trans people especially transfem people leave this fandom. people can slap anti-jkr in their bio as much as they want, a terf is still a fucking terf.

#i dont really have the energy to have like the benefit of the doubt for people engaging in these discussions cause like #i have done so and it still happens lol #i understand people might not think theyre transphobic but examine how u think and what u say come on #anyway anon plz just block and unfollow ppl and take care of yourself if you still want to engage with the fandom. there are good people bu #it can take some time to find!!#harry potter #transphobia #answered #r/s #also forgot to say i actually didn't get any of this on my dash this time but i had a poke around and found the discourse pretty easily

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urboymutual · 2 years

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hiii i think youve got some good thoughts on things and I was wondering what your thoughts on transandrophobia were?

hi anon thats nice of u to say!

but um im not sure exactly what ur looking for so ill try to answer ur question to the best of my abilities fjfjjf

as a transmasc dude i dont think i personally ever experienced transandrophobia? just like my own experience (frankly i feel i def have more privilege compared to transfem people but thats my opinion ofc) but i've experienced transphobia for being a trans man but never like. specifically for being a trans man idk i definitely dont wanna discount other trans masc people's experiences but its not something i feel i ever struggled with? (like if anything i feel like being a man of color has more of an impact vs like being a trans guy if that makes sense ((for my own identity ofc))

tho another reason i kinda have this mindset is that ive been in communities with heavy transmascs populations compared to transfems like in high school there were like. 20 transmasc students and ive only interacted with 2 transfem ppl and one was a trans woman who i think dropped out bc of the transmisogyny she experienced so :/

yeah idk bc i know a lot of ppl talk abt (expecially on the r/ftm reddit which i lowkey like . hate the vibes of . like a LOT . i only used it for looking at other ppls top surgery experiences) transandrophobia and like the invisibility of being transmasc but like i said ive mostly been in heavy transmasc communities. like even going to t-camp which is a camp for transgender college students in california there were like . 10 transfems compared to the 40 transmasc ppl so it was like . idk transmasc ppl havent been invisible to me at least.

and i do know there r like some statistics abt how like transmascs r denied hrt and surgery coverage more compared to transfems tho its also im not educated enough i guess but why does it no longer become just like transphobia. why is it considered transandrophobia when transfems also get denied hrt and surgery coverage just maybe not at the same rates?? but like i wonder if the statistics took into account like population variables? bc if ur gonna have 60/100 transmascs denied hrt compared to 30/60 transfems denied hrt like of course its going to be like transmascs being denied more hrt??? idk this is kinda becoming ranty so im just gonna wrap it up

i personally haven't experienced transandrophobia but i wont try to like . discount other transmasc's experiences. tho i do not think like transfems can perpetuate transandrophobia towards transmascs and transmasc individuals still have a certain degree of privilege over transfem individuals . i hope that makes sense and answers ur question!

#r/ftm is literally the most 😭😭 fucking reddit community #so many of those guys r like. idk i saw a transfem make a post like i hope its fine for me to be here bc i just wanna be educated on-#transmasc issues and the guys in the comments were like UR OPRESSING ME WOMAN. by commenting on this forum as a transfem ur SILENCING ME #idk theyre such whiny ass babies like transmascs ppl dont speak over tranfems constantly #tho i try to. hold it in bc i know some transmen think the way to achieving 'masculinity' is silencing womens voices lol #but ofc like idk maybe there r some transmascs out there experiencing transandrophobia #idk anon u got me thinking abt this now 🤔🤔

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prettyboykatsuki · 3 years

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Aristotle, this was an older take you mentioned on your blog that I literally completely forgot to ask you about, but I just remembered as I was looking for the ask so here goes: I’d love to hear more about how you link queerness with disagreeing with common fanon characterizations/not being into hard mean dom characterizations because I am queer and fall in the camp of disagreeing with a lot of them and I’d love to hear your thoughts. I’m sorry if this comes off as creepy or out of nowhere, I swear that wasn’t my intention asdfghjkl

i could honest to god write a thesis on this like i think about it so much with a lot of examples in peoples im mutuals with (btw mutuals i may adress u in here if u want me to take u out pls let me know)

cw for fetishization, gender stereotypes, and general discussions of toxic masculinity / gender roles

this is super long because the subject is really nuanced and i could probably go on and on about it. please ask me abt it dsjhfkds

disclaimer! write characters however. this is me just observing stuff. no worries.

in my experience on tumblr and in the general fanfiction writing community - there is a very, very big difference in how specific types of people, specifically queer / openly queer people, interact with characters and characterization on this app. i dont think most people even really notice or know that it happens but it's something i've observed over time.

one of my biggest gripes with fandom and particularly the self-insert community, is how people tend to characterize male characters by divying them up into these two boxes of submissive and dominant.

being brutally honest - i think a lot of the characterizations of many male characters have largely to do with how many of the people in the self-insert community are femme presenting cis women.

and that presentation and gender identity + in addition to sexuality have a lot to do with how men are written in this app. in a way, it's almost a given because if you don't fall into being a cis, femme presenting women, your relationship to things like gender and what role you play in relationships is very very different.

i find this mostly to be in how things how certain characters are written as inherently more submissive vs how certain characters are written as inherently more dominant. i'll use baku but there are several characters i find this to be true.

tanjiro, yuuji, hinata vs inosuke, megumi, and kageyama.

bakugou is a character i get a lot of.. commentary on when i write him to be a submissive person in the relationship and this rlly only happens when i write him in the context of reader-insert. people will openly disagree with the characterization of bakugou that is clingy, submissive, and needy especially when i write it with fem!self-insert

but he's not the only character. any male character that aren't extremely emotional or upbeat get a degree of this treatment. kageyama, sasuke, megumi - i could go on and on.

and i think there in lies the inherent link between how queerness effects your role in a relationship and how that impacts how you see male characters and in what way you see them. how much vulnerability you're willing to write in for them etc.

when you're a queer person - you are very comfortable with the idea that a man can be a vulnerable and submissive kind of person in a relationship because you, yourself, do not have a lot of orthodoxy in your relationships. and your "level" of queerness is especially important because well, if you're a femme presenting bisexual woman who has only ever dated cis men, you've probably got a rather set role in how you perceive men and male characters.

you're probably more likely than a cishet femme woman to be okay with vulnerable and submissive male characters, but it's unlikely that you stray too far from dominant men.

where on the other hand, if you're a masculine cis woman, or a trans man, or a femme presenting lesbian or a masc nonbinary person or really anyone that is openly and outwardly queer - your views of how men can be and how men are a lot more broad almost inherently.

because you yourself do not fit an orthodoxy in relationships. you yourself cannot afford being part of any heteronormativity so your perception of a character is completely.

there's a lot to it - like how people are also comfortable writing someone like deku as submissive but someone like bakugou as dominant.

is it bc maybe you perceive anger and stoicism as dominant masculine traits and you perceive emotion and vulnerability to submissive feminine traits?

just some food for thought about how fandom sometimes accidentally perpetuates heteronormativity.

#return to sender #characterization tag #i have a lot of thoughts about this #and how fandom kind of tends to push a lot of inherently heteronormative perceptions of characters #that in turn make characterization more and more.. lackluster ig #i have a lot of specific mutuals i would love to come discuss this with me #particularly saint and riley since they are part of the openly queer mutuals gang for me #but yeah its a lot lmfao i think about it A Lot

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backyardboytoy · 2 years

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About me:

22 years old, Trans man (Him/he only), A verse!

Gay and Masc leaning sexually. I think gals and fems are neat, too, just to a lesser degree. I'm more attracted to masculine presenting peeps, basically. You'll still find gals and fems on my blog, tho since I do like some too :^)

If you need a name feel free to call me Jack! (Not my irl name just an alias)

If you wanna interact, I'd prefer you just send something in the inbox. I'm not typically one for Dming messages back and forth often. But I do enjoy asks <3 please send them if you wanna

Yes, I have induced lactation IRL, I've never been a seashorse dad before.

I'm not looking for actual relationships or IRL meet-ups, but Kink talks about such fantasies that are welcome (as long as you're aware it's in fiction)

Kinks you'll see here:

-Monster fucking (love em), Lactation/Hucow adjacent fantasies, Breeding/Impregnation, Pregnancy/Mpreg, Hyperpregnancy, Rapid pregnancy, Size differences, Cumflation

DNI:

-Detrans kink/misgendering kink blogs

-People with Men dni (bc I am men 😐)

-Ppl dmin specifically looking for nudes, Also please don't send me them. I'm not looking for Them! Just enjoy what I happen to post to the blog

-TERFS

-People under 18

Turn offs:

Birth, Scat, Bursting, Choking, Certain types of feminization (im still a man, even if I'm heavily pregnant with twenty kids or some shit), misgendering, detrans stuff, hard degradation (im fine with light tho like slvt/manw0re)

#jack rabbit text

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darlington-v · 3 years

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HELLO YES IS ONE OF(?) THE FELLOW TRANSMASC BEEDUO ENJOYERS, RESPONDING AFTER A MULTIDAY DELAY.

CANT BELIVE THAT HANDHOLDING SHIT.

As someone else who has (on a certain level) like, made that connection, of someone I can be very affectionate with, but am still in the gender closet with for various reasons. I can absolutely understand your impulse and the preassure... a lot of my hesitation is based around a fear of going against some kind of perceived "ground work" in that relationship. And then I get frustrated because in this relationship and others i just would not have to think so much about this and how I present myself if I had just been born a cisguy. I am also just yearning for bro friendships where I'm just perceived as a dude from the get-go, even if I end up acting ""feminin"" or some shit.

But when I think about all the relationships I've had, I wouldn't want to have "skipped over" any of them, even if I wasn't, or didn't start by presenting my truly authentic self. I can't bring myself to regret or fully resent any of those connections, even if in my heart I can't always regard them as 100% "valid" or "genuine" in the context of how I know I was/am perceived and how I present. I dunno, I hope that makes sense, and helps in some way... I guess what im trying to say is, even if I have wishes and yearnings of how things could be different, I still am happy to have had the relationships I've had.... and I know ill just keep meeting new folks and either things will work out or they wont, and that'll be ultimatly for the best...

But hughu its also kinda silly when I think about it, that some internet dudes make me confront and think about all this shit. But it also does make sense too.

I don't know its very hard to explain, feel free to just ignore all this.

yes!!!! i TOTALLY understand this!

it's really frustrating because i would love to seek out other communities and environments that may lead into relationships similar to that of like??? SAME AFFECTION????? but im afraid to put myself out ANYWHERE new because i don't want to be perceived as like... woman-lite or anything. i don't want anyone to have to rethink how they perceive me i just wanted to present in the way that i feel.

similarly to what you said, i don't want to build something on "ground-work" i know i'll have to break down and like. make the REAL ground work pretty much?

and yeah! same! i get frustrated as well because it would just be much easier to deal w/ if i was just. cis. but i don't dwell on that too much, luckily

however i still run into the same issue: (more long winded venty shit below, ur invited to me being extremely vulnerable on the internet have fun)

how can i deal with this and make this easier for myself? is it... achievable even? like! yeah! how can i simply start new relationships with this... pre-established certainty of "that is a Boy! a BONAFIDE boy!" like... not even cis but just.

i struggle with the idea that most people who aren't trans will like... not... TRULY respect my identity? like behind closed doors. which is something i know a lot of trans people struggle with and honestly that is... our own issue in regards to trust. if no one throws and red flags that they don't actually respect your identity, then you really just have to trust that they do.

it's just... honestly putting conditions on like. your trust i guess. PERSONALLY. like im putting conditions on myself such as: if i present masculine then people will respect my identity and assimilate to how i identify, even if i don't present that yet.

which... usually isn't the case? people may take longer to assimilate but if someone is going to respect you, you can usually tell. or i feel like i can.

however. i guess. i want to shortcut the assimilation? but it's unfair to me to just put myself on hold until i don't need to ask people to like. REALLY understand liek HEY. THAT PITCHY MOTHERFUCKER IS A DUDE. because it's hard. and i, in my tiny pea brain, feel like a shortcut would just already be presenting male boy man MASCULINE. however, like i said, it's unfair for me to put that on myself bc that's a LONG time to wait!! that's coming out, getting a new wardrobe, and ALSO getting HRT!! that doesn't just happen in one day.

i explained to some friends that like. sometimes i wish i could just present a certain way and then no one could really ever know me intimately.

and it's definitely not that im... ASHAMED of being trans!! it's very nice and cool! however i feel sad that like... we're still adjusting as a society in terms of like... gender i guess? like... i do not want to be seen as woman-lite by anyone. in any degree. and sometimes you need a deeper understanding of gender to get past like... the weird like. ok he's... he's boy but like kinda not boy??

IT'S JUST. MMM. BEING PERCEIVED AND NOT INTERPRETTED CORRECTLY IS VERY TERRIFYING AND I HATE IT AND UR RIGHT BEING CIS WOULD BE EASIER, I DON'T NECESSARILY WANT TO BE CIS, I WOULD JUST LIKE TO EMULATE CISNESS WHILST REMAINING QUEER WHICH I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF IT'S POSSIBLE.

however same!!! the relationships i have now i love and i care very deeply about and i feel that like... even though they've known me before i was like "ok masc and he/they" and shit like that, i do feel like they understand like

*points* boy!!

however when it comes to strangers it's so... scary. and like IDK. ITS SO FUNNY BECAUSE I'VE NEVER HAD TO DEAL WITH THIS BEFORE. AND IT'S WHY I WANT TO LIKE? EXPLORE THE COMMUNITY FOR OLDER TRANS PEOPLE. LIKE HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH THIS???? how can you just BE OKAY when like... introducing yourself to strangers.

how can you just let... strangers in?

which is also *THROWS THINGS* THE WORST PART!!! I WANT TO BE A CONTENT CREATOR BUT I DON'T WANT TO WAIT!!!! I WANT MY VIEWERS TO GO BOY BOY BUT THEY WONT BECAUSE I HAVE NO FORM OF PRESENTATION BESIDE A PERSONA AND A VOICE AND MY VOICE IS PITCHY!!! ITS SO HIGH AND PITCHY!!!

and it's frustrating!! because i don't want an audience who doesn't like understand BOY!!! NOT WOMAN-LITE!!!!!!! NOT WOMAN GOING THRU PHASE!!!!!

BOYYYYY!!!!!

TLDR;

being trans is hard and i just don't want to be seen as woman-lite. i want to bee seen as like cis boy but trans. like i think i'd take more kindly to someone being like "omg i didn't even know you were trans!" to like someone infantilizing me and calling me a sweet little boy bean. and thats a lot easier between close friends! even though they have heard my voice and they've listened to me talk about being trans! they understand. and strangers?? have the potential to not. like they might? but what if they dont... and that's. Scary.

#asks #anon #prince is a fahjay #actually anon this has been a therapy session in and of its own and it's helped a lot! my therapist was like #THIS IS MULTILAYERED #THIS IS GONNA NEED MULTIPLE SESSIONS #and i was like ahhh shit ur right #but this actually helped me compose my thoughts! :]#trans achilleans getting sent into queer crises by bee duo squad #new long ass tag

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