a idea- mainly Bruce
I like the idea of Bruce being really weird and random at the most surprising times just to mess with people and Damian, Dick and every other kid sadly got that trait too.
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Damian: as a child of divorce-
Talia: me and my beloved is not divorced.
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Clark: Bruce why didn't you say anything about them?!
Bruce: What they look at me first it's not my fault I'm a snack
Clark: Bruce you have kids.
Bruce: A Dilf snack
Clark: No!
Bruce: Listen as the hottest one here-
Hal: What you not that hot-
Bruce: AS THE MOST SCRUMPTIOUS SNACK HERE!
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I swear all his kids got this trait from him, they watched and learned from the best so they all do it too
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Jason: one time I got stuck in a hole for months
Roy: A hole why'd you get stuck-
Jason: I kinda like....died so yeah kinda got stuck in a hole for months I'm lucky they didn't cremate me.
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Dick: if Damian ever had a date I'd kill them
Wally: Dick you can't just kill someone because-
Dick: if anyone lays a hand on my baby brother they are dead.
Wally: I thought bats don't-
Dick: I'm not a bat I'm a big brother first.
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Tim: why did my camera break? It lasted two years falling off fire escapes and getting shot at but it died when I knocked it off my desk...why did it have to leave me in this cold cold world...
Steph: are you sure he was only supposed to take 2 pills?
Cass: *shrugs*
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Jason with his gay dads (it's take ur kid to work day) /j
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yourself or someone like you
"Crap!" the food truck worker shrieks in alarm. "Don't hurt him, Superman, he's just a kid!"
Clark . . . pauses, then looks up from the kid that he is currently pinning into the street as said kid struggles underneath him.
"'Hurt him'?" he asks in reflexive confusion, and then realizes how batting a teenager around like a person-shaped cat toy and pinning him to the street hard enough to crack it probably actually looks to an outside observer.
. . . um.
Whoops.
"Um," he starts awkwardly, and then the kid slips his pin while he's distracted and throws his arms around his neck with a gleeful laugh and a bright grin.
"Dad!" he crows triumphantly, and hugs Clark harder than literally anyone has ever hugged him before.
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Clark: *casually mentions that he wants (insert brand/company name)*
Bruce: *Buys the whole brand/company for him*
Clark: *clarifies in a flustered manner that he only wants a product/service from said brand/company, not to own the entire franchise*
Or the opposite: Clark is having trouble tracking down a company whistleblower for a story (cough, Boeing) and the next day suddenly, mysteriously, that company’s stock tanks and Clark has 3-5 new sources in his inbox.
He can’t ever prove it was Bruce. But he KNOWS.
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We don't talk enough about the superbat divorce arc comic.
He's begging clark not to leave his ass and listen to him.
No this is just heartbreaking actually I cried during the whole comic run, Bruce searching for clark only to be told that clark isn't going to listen to him anymore even if there's a chance he's alive.
THIS.FUCKING.SCENE. DC WHEN I CATCH YOU- WHEN I CATCH YOU DC-
And in the end he burns the letter he wrote for clark okay so this is really just a divorce fic isn't it
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[ Clark arrives at a Batfamily meeting. ]
Bruce: Clark? I thought you left for your mission.
Clark: You wish I left already, so you and Harley could continue sneaking around behind my back.
Bruce:...What are you talking about?
Dick: Not sure what's happening, but I'm here for the drama.
Stephanie: I'm right there with you, Dick.
Clark: You and Harley are dating!
[ Everyone looks at Harley. ]
Harley: I mean, I think you're a great guy, Bruce...
Bruce: What? You think I'd date Harley Quinn.
Harley: Hurtful.
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My Adventures With Superman 03 (2024)
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