cheers lads, you managed to create the WORST first frame of a video in the history of the moving picture 🥳🍾

An Itch to Scratch🔞

Info: fem/reader x Zoro, MDNI, Mature, implied masturbation, cunnilingus, vaginal intercourse, cock warming, enough plot to get to the point🔞

Context: You and Zoro have the same issue and come to the same conclusion.

The feeling was both unbearable and embarrassing. The unique situation made Y/N wonder if this is how Sanji felt most of the time when Nami gave him the cold shoulder. Why it was worse now, she couldn't guess, but she needed a release.

The two faithful toys Y/N kept clean and ready failed right when she was about to peak. The first toy just took forever, and the second was only half-charged and died right at her peak. Y/N wanted to scream at the loss of sensation and flung her toy at the wall.

"Useless!" She cried as she picked up the broken toy and dumped it in the trash. Y/N then went to the ship's bathing room for a long shower at full power.

This is hell, pure hell, Zoro thought as he scratched his scalp red.

He couldn't explain what was going on with him. His usually trained body was not cooperating with him. 'The Need', as he referred it to himself, had appeared that morning. He dealt with it as usual, like an adult, whenever 'The Need' arrived.

Only this time, it wouldn't go away. Oh, he would get his release, but not even two hours later, 'The Need' would be back, stronger than ever. Zoro couldn't explain it. Not even when he was a teenager did he need to jerk off this much. After jerk-off number three, Zoro ignored the 'The Need' when it appeared an hour later.

Training, just think of it like training. A form of self-discipline.

He then hissed as his hard, throbbing cock rubbed against the fabric of his pants the wrong way as he walked to the bathhouse on the ship. Maybe nearly drowning in a tub of ice water would make this torture stop.

Zoro had just turned a corner when Y/N nearly crashed into him.

"Oh! Sorry," She said, sounding moody.

Zoro noted her wet hair and flushed skin. Worse, he could smell the soap she used mixed with her own scent. Zoro heard himself swallow and covered his face to keep from inhaling more of her alluring amora.

"Are you alright, Zoro?"

"Fine." He replied gruffly.

Y/N sighed and was about to leave when a thought occurred to her. She grabbed Zoro by the opening of his robe and dragged him with her.

“Hey! What-”

Zoro stopped his protest as he studied Y/n's body. She was tense in her back and shoulders as if something was weighing her down. If she had just taken a shower, shouldn't it have gone away?

Maybe she had a problem, he thought, and hoped it would be enough to distract him from his issue if she was planning to tell him. He let Y/n take him to a storage closet and waited for her to talk.

“Do you remember that conversation we had at the bar about four weeks ago?”

Zoro glanced up and hummed as he thought about what she was asking. He made an annoyed sound when the memory wouldn't come to him.

“That's okay, you will in a second. Zoro, I need you to have sex with me.”

His dark eye widened, and just as Y/n said, the conversation came back to him in a flash. It started with Sanji chasing after a busty barmaid and ended with breakfast being late the following day.

Zoro had made some comment that Y/N overheard. Somehow, the pair made a pack to come to each other if they needed relief. But that was supposed to be a joke, right?

The hard cock in his pants didn't care if it was a joke or not and throbbed at the offer.

“Huh?!” Zoro said as his dick screamed at him to shut-up and take Y/n’s offer.

“Look, I wouldn't ask you this if I wasn't desperate. I usually can handle this myself, but my body is being a literal bitch to me right now.” Y/n explained as her cheeks flushed with embarrassed heat.

Zoro's face also flushed since he never expected a trusted crewmate to ask him such a thing.

“What do you mean you can’t handle it?!”

“I mean, I've tried and failed. I need something else! I need…” Y/n cut herself off and looked away.

This was a bad idea. Worse, she pulled Zoro into her issue. She respected the swordsman and trusted him, but this was so inappropriate.

Y/n bit her lip and said to him, “Sorry, forget what I said. It was stupid of me to ask.”

She then moved past him with her eyes lowered to the ground. His hand shot out and grabbed her arm.

“If we do this, we keep it to ourselves. And we don't make a habit of it.”

Y/n's head snapped to Zoro. She was ready to say he didn't need to give in to her request or feel obligated to help when Zoro untied his red sash and dropped his robe. God help her; her mouth practically watered at the bulge in Zoro's pants.

“Oh,” She said dumbly. “Wait, how long-?”

“All day,” Zoro huffed as he crossed his arms. “All fucking day.”

It was her turn to swallow as the air around them suddenly thickened. She wanted to move closer to Zoro and feel for herself how hard his cock was under his pants. Instead, she breathed slowly through her nose and out her parted lips. She needed to think. To evaluate the situation.

What I need, her body and brain said in unison, is to put that cock in my-

"Y/N."

Y/N's eyes flicked back up at Zoro. A smooth smirk played at his lips, and why not? He had something she wanted, and they both knew it. She could understand how it would stroke his pride to see how her breathing had changed and how her eyes darkened with lust.

The fact was, she had something he wanted, and Y/N could see the change in him as well.

“Please, Zoro. Just this one time.” She said in a heated whisper.

Fine, Zoro thought as he moved closer to Y/N. He picked her up and sat her on top of a crate. They could be adults about this and fuck like the crazed animals their instincts wanted them to be. Y/n blinked up at him as he pushed up her skirt and pulled down the lace panties.

I should be embarrassed. I should stop this. I should...

Y/N's mind stopped as Zoro dipped his head down, one hand wrapping around his throbbing cock. As he went down, Y/N simultaneously spread her legs and leaned back, careful not to topple over, but the crate was long enough to accommodate her.

Zoro released a long, appraising breath that made Y/N shiver and close her eyes.

"What a needy woman you are, Y/N. You're already wet." Zoro's voice rumbled.

Y/N cried out as she felt a smooth, wet tongue slide up her folds and flick at her clit. She squirmed on the crate and tried to close her legs as more of a reaction then a rejection.

Zoro slapped his hands on her inner thighs, making Y/N yelp in surprise. Zoro forced her bent legs down in a frog-like position to open her up completely to him.

He grinned up at her.

"I doubt it'll solve your problem, but I want to give this a try."

Y/N's breath stuttered, and then, her head was whipped back as Zoro dug on in. She wondered where he had learned. Her second thought was being grateful she had bathed. The last was purely worshiping her new god, Zoro's tongue.

"Fuck...Oh...fuck...Zoro..."

Zoro chuckled into her as he licked and sucked, added his fingers to throw her off, or when she dared to mention "god" in the mix. He edged her close, to the very fucking edge and then pulled away. The near-angry/desperate scream she made had him laughing and smirking down at her.

"ZORO! THE FUCK!"

"Easy there, pussy cat." He grinned as he moved over her, his cock in hand. "We're doing this together."

Y/N huffed as she panted. Her eyes were blown with lust, and her cheeks flushed as she gave him an impatient look. He chuckled again and rubbed the round head over her clit, then pressed it against her folds.

She hated the needy whimper that left her, but dammit, she needed to come already!

"Zoro...Please..."

The smirk was gone as Zoro felt a bead of sweat running down his near his ear and neck. He wasn't inside her yet, but he knew she would be warm and snug. Just one thrust and things would change between them.

"Y/N, you sure-"

"Yes! Please, god damn you! Hurry up before I dry up and go to Sanji-"

The cook's name was barely out of her mouth when Zoro pulled her closer and bucked his hip. The feeling was painful and delicious as her eyes rolled back and her body arched.

"OH! Fu-"

"You deserved that; I hope you know that."

Y/N laughed and smirked at Zoro, "Yeah, I do. But worth it."

"You brat."

Zoro then did something Y/N didn't expect, he kissed her. She accepted the kiss as her arms and legs went around him. What followed was 20 minutes of mind-blowing rutting.

Zoro wanted longer, but she was too wet and hot for him not to lose it just 6 minutes in! Worse, he had a feeling this wasn't going to be a one-time thing.

He held Y/N's wrist down as he let his world crumble as she squeezed the life out of him as she came. The sweet mewling sounds Y/N made his ego roar as his cock twitched side her.

His sweat-covered forehead rested on the crook of her neck, and he breathed in her sweet-smelling skin. Finally, his body felt satisfied enough not to bother him for a while, and he yawned as he felt ready to nap.

"Did you just yawn?" Y/N giggled as she pushed against him, but his body refused to budge.

"Need to nap," Zoro simply grunted as he wrapped his arms around her soft body.

"Zoro, your cock is still in me."

"Leave it. It's not hurting you."

"That's not the point. Zoro, get-"

Zoro then snored, and Y/n sighed as she wondered how long of a nap he would need before he let her go. She then yawned and prayed that her back wouldn't be sore later as she fell asleep under him, feeling satisfied at last.

mr. dr. chuck, i'm a few months ago i told a doc of mine that i believe i'm on the spectrum (after yeeeears of considering all the reasons why i thought so) and she agreed with me. then i came to some conclusions about members of my family. then i started melting down and haven't really recovered.

i'm in my 30's, but my life feels like it's been the mistake-addled 24th year for over a decade. people, choices, wants, they feel like things that were silly blips and not of much substance. i'm tired and my body hurts, so it feels harder to get to things i need. doctors don't seem like they can be trusted because of all the other ways i show up in the world.

i'm worried about my life and my future, and it feels like my magic is gone (or that i can't touch it right now). do you have any words of wisdom for someone who found out this really big thing about themselves kind of late?

thank you.

hello buckaroo thank you for writing. first of all i will say MOST IMPORTANT thing to remember is that it is okay and valid to FEEL the way that you feel. your reaction to this news or any news really is not wrong. that does not mean you cant wish for another reaction or WORK TOWARDS another reaction, but in grand cosmic sense this is just your way. YOUR TROT IS VALID and we all have our own unique way. sometimes that path is an easy path with sunny days and smiles and a glorious view, and sometimes it is through the darkness of shadows or crawling through the old bog. we can PREFER one path over the other, but neither is WRONG.

when giving advice old chuck tries to not PROJECT what i think YOU should do because that is not really the point. this is your trot to trot and i do not think it is my place to act like some authority of your way. what chuck can do is tell you MY story of diagnosis and how it made ME feel and maybe you can take little pieces of that for yourself.

chuck learned of way on autism spectrum when i was in early twenties by doctor who said 'yes this is your way'. when i learned of my spectrum way my reaction was: wow this is very very cool i am so lucky because all of my heroes are autistic and now i am in this RADICAL CLUB. we are special and unique and DANG what a treat wish i could have a membership card in my wallet to show all my buds.

now obviously this is not everyones reaction, but as starting off point i wonder what it would have meant to my future if the news would have HIT ME IN A BAD WAY. if i would have felt let a dang robot alien who didnt belong. maybe id be swimmin through the bog ever since.

thing is I LIKE ROBOT ALIENS they are very cool. doctor did not MAKE me different, i was different already, our talks just popped a nice little name on it for me to take or leave. i took the name proudly because DATA from stars trek (certified robot alien) is exactly how i already felt and dang what a cool character and dang what a great life. so was DAVID BYRNE. so was every cool buckaroo artist that i liked. cowboys are OUTSIDER HEROES and that is how my autism makes me feel.

so like i said, i do not know about YOUR way, but MY WAY of hearing this news was heaps of joy and excitement. i will also say that it is very DIFFICULT to find this reaction later if your first leap is feeling in a sad way about it. so maybe if you want to trot back in your mind to those first few steps it would be helpful. maybe mentally trot to where you were pushed off a dang cliff and think "well was i pushed off a cliff or was i just told 'hey bud youve been floating this whole time?"'

because if youve been floating then DANG thats a lot of power. thats not falling. you can float up, you can float down, you can float side to side.

the next thing i will say AS AND ARTIST is that years of toiling and feeling aimless are NEVER actually aimless when it comes to creation. and to LIVE in a human body is to be an artist, because you are CONSTANTLY CREATING the future. when i am writing and i dont have an idea for my next book that can be frustrating, but it is also PART of the process. if i walk to the store to rustle up my mind, or wander around the park, or spend a whole WEEK feeling weird because of writers block THAT IS ALL PART OF MAKING GREAT ART. that is not wasted time. in other words, your years of toiling are not wasted time, that is just the process we all have when we are creating a future masterpiece.

complicated // colby brock (pt. 2)

A/N: hilariously when i first drafted this, i was gonna make it a lot meaner/hate fucking like, with a lot of jealousy thrown in. but damnit, bridgerton has foiled my plans again and has really turned me into a lover lol so i made this a little bit softer than originally planned. hope yall like it regardless, and please let me know what you think :) see yall with another fic real soon !

prompt: time has passed since you and sam hooked up, and all seems well. except now… colby is upset with you for some unknown reason. || fem!reader x colby brock

trigger warning: SMUT, angst, jealous!colby, possessive!colby, he's still really sweet tho, you guys were out clubbing so... tipsy/drunk sex, mentions of: baby, good girl, darling, cursing, quasi-public sex, could almost get caught, lots of teasing (both sexually and non), mentions of colby having seen you and sam hooking up, sweet ending :)

word count: 3066

~~~~~~~

The morning after Sam and I had sex was awkward to say the least.

We both ignored each other, which was easy since Sam and Colby had many calls and business related things to do. And I, being their assistant, had my own tasks at hand for the following week to start.

But when Sam and I were finally able to sit down and talk about it, it went surprisingly well.

We came to two very important conclusions: one, while we had fun, we weren’t going to ever do it again. We cared too much about our friendship to let sex ruin it. Plus the spark really had only been there that night.

And two, we were to never tell Colby.

Everything seemed good for a while. Life got back into the swing of things; Sam and Colby were traveling, I was handling the business side while they were gone. Normal, boring life occurred.

But all the while, I had this strange feeling. Maybe it was due to the fact that Colby had grown cold towards me, almost standoffish. He sometimes would keep to himself, that wasn't unusual; but his demeanor around me became stiff, almost like he was upset at me.

I wanted to confront him, ask him what was wrong, but it never felt like the right time. When the right time finally did come, it was during a couple days stretch where the boys had off. One night when we went out and both came home empty handed, I decided to finally ask him.

His answer was not at all what I was expecting, but in a way it was the one I wanted to hear all along.

I wanted the truth and now I was finally getting it.

~~~~~~

“No way. I cannot believe you used to run away from cops for a living.” Nicole, Sam’s new… friend, said as we walked into Sam and Colby’s house.

A playful look rested on Sam’s face as he nodded. “Yeah, and we did it pretty well.”

“Up until you got arrested.” I chimed in, smirking.

She gasped. “Oh my God, you got arrested? For what?”

“Breaking and entering. And fake ids.” Colby explained.

“Woah woah, the fake ids were just a you charge, Colby.” Sam replied defensively.

“And that was the first and last time Sam and Colby were separated ever again.” I quipped.

Colby turned to look at Sam, a faux-pained expression on his face. “I just can't quit you.”

“Me neither, brother.” Sam sniffled, pretending to hold back tears. The both placed hands on each others' shoulders, giving a tight squeeze.

Nicole glanced back and forth at Sam, Colby, and me, amused. “You guys are so funny. I have been having such a blast all night.”

“I'm happy to entertain you for as long as you'd like.” Sam lowered his voice to an almost sultry tone, moving to her side.

She bit her lip, looking into his eyes. “Maybe you could do that alone? Upstairs, perhaps?"

Sam gave a cheeky look at me and Colby, "I'll see you guys later."

Nicole giggled as she pulled Sam up the stairs, Sam following suit as he whispered something to her and snickered. I peered over at Colby, waiting for Sam's door to shut before speaking. "Well, she seems nice."

“Yeah she's sweet.” Colby agreed, pulling out his phone. He began to walk to the kitchen, and I followed him.

“So... what do you plan to do the rest of the night?” I asked.

He mumbled. “Might order some postmates, then call it a night.”

“Exciting.” I deadpanned, slightly annoyed at him. I changed the subject, thinking that was the cause, “That new club we went to was a lot of fun. The live music was so cool to hear.”

“Yeah it was.” Colby didn't look up, continuing to scroll through his phone.

I sighed, exhausted. “You know, you've been acting this way all night with me.”

“Like what?” He exhaled, finally looking up.

“Short. To the point.” I stated.

He shrugged. “I don't feel like being social.”

I scrunched my face at him, “It was your idea to go out tonight.”

“My social battery ran out really fast then.” Colby blinked, frowning.

“It's not just tonight though. You've been like this for over a week at this point. I thought maybe it was because of work, but....” I trailed off, unsure.

He pursed his lips, “What?”

“You're icing me out. What did I do?” I questioned, stepping towards him.

He moved back, shaking his head. “I don't want to talk about this.”

I followed him. “Well I do. So talk.”

“Okay, if you really want to talk…” He rubbed his eyes for a moment, finally speaking. “Do you have something to tell me?”

My heart stopped. “What?”

He repeated, his eyes icy. “Do you have something to tell me?”

I sucked my teeth, knowing exactly what Colby was referring to. “...I'm gonna kill Sam.”

He chuckled darkly, “Oh, no no. Don't get pissed at the guy that told me what happened.”

I huffed, “We promised each other not to tell you.”

“He folded real quick on that.” Colby crossed his arms, leaning against the counter.

I stared up at him, puzzled. “When did he tell you?”

“A couple days after it happened.” He informed.

I groaned, spinning to yell towards the stairs, “He really went behind my back and just flat out told you. What the fuck, Sam?!”

“Why didn't you tell me?” Colby argued.

I turned back, “Oh, c'mon Colby. You know why.”

“No please, do tell. I would love to hear why.” He jeered.

I swallowed hard, trying to keep my composure. “Do you think I want to tell one of my best friends 'hey just so you know, me and your other best friend, who is also my friend, fucked'? Of course not!”

“Why? You shouldn't feel uncomfortable doing that. Since you did it so publicly, in this very room, might I add.” He shot back.

My eyes widened for a second. “He told you we fucked in the kitchen?”

“No. He's too nice for that.” Colby stepped towards me, almost looming over me. “Do you remember a couple months back when we thought someone was trying to break into the house, so we got extra security cameras installed?”

I crossed my arms defensively, “What does that have to do with this?”

“We didn't get the cameras installed just outside the house. We also got some installed in the common areas. One in the living room....” He leaned down, whispering. “And one in the kitchen.”

“You're kidding.” My breath hitched involuntarily. 

“Any and every movement that happens in these areas gets recorded. When Sam told me you two fucked, I thought he was joking. But I checked…” His voice fell off, an almost smirk coming to his face.

I stuttered, “Y-You-?”

“You really know how to put on a performance.” Colby spoke condescendingly, staring into my eyes with a mischievous glint.

I scoffed, putting space between us. “Fuck you.”

He rolled his eyes, “You wish.”

I glared, exhaling harshly. “You know, you're acting like a jealous boyfriend.”

“Really?” He sassed.

“Yeah. Why the fuck do you care if I slept with Sam? You've never cared about who he hooks up with. But you suddenly care when it's me?" I scowled.

“I care who he hooks up with.” He argued.

I placed my hands on my hips, “Name me literally one girl he's gotten with within the last month or two. Any of them.”

“Nicole is upstairs with him now.” He remarked sarcastically.

I narrowed my gaze, “She doesn't count.”

“Sorry I don't memorize all of their names. I don't need to really remember them since I'm not the one sleeping with them.” Colby bickered, turning away from me.

I thought for a moment, a realization appearing in my mind, “Any time I've almost hooked up with someone, you've always been so aggressive towards them afterwards. But now since it was Sam, you're angry with me.”

“I'm upset because you didn't tell me. Instead, you wanted to keep it a secret from me. That's why I'm pissed.” He rebutted, facing me once more.

“But what's the difference between Sam telling you or me telling you? You've known basically since it happened, why are you still holding it against me?” I sneered, “Unless, of course, you're jealous.”

He queried angrily, “Jealous of what, exactly?”

“You're jealous I didn't sleep with you.” I hissed.

He shook his head, his voice faltering. “Give me a break, Y/N.”

“No no, be honest Colby. Why else are you pissed? You found out a week ago, and have held it against me just because I wasn't the one that told you. You found out regardless, so what is there to be pissed about?” I searched his eyes, but he tilted his head away from my glare. “It's none of your fucking business who I sleep with, whether it's Sam, the guy down the street, or a random guy at the club. You're not my boyfriend. I'm allowed to fuck whoever I want to!”

I spun on my heel, but Colby's hand gripped my wrist, spinning me back to him. My eyes locked with his for a brief moment as he grabbed my face, kissing me deeply. I shuddered a breath, taken aback by how passionate the kiss was. Colby wrapped an arm around me, pulling me against him, as his other hand pulled on my hair lightly.

“You're right, Y/N. I hate how fucking right you always are.” He nipped at my lips, a low groan leaving his mouth. “Do you know how frustrating it is seeing you with other guys? Seeing them put their hands on you, when that's all I can think about doing?”

“Colby!” I gasped quietly, our mouths meeting again. He pressed me against the counter, the spot feeling eerily similar on my back.

Was this the same spot as-?

“I shouldn't have been a dick to you, I'm sorry. But I will never apologize for wanting you all to myself.” His voice came out in an almost growl, “I want you to be mine, and mine alone.”

My mouth fumbled over my words, my hands gliding up his back. “W-Why didn't you just say that? Why now?”

“Seeing you fuck Sam in here weirdly was the wake up call I needed,” he chuckled bitterly. “I thought that maybe all this time I was just overly protective but no... I am jealous. I don’t want to see you with anyone else ever again.”

Colby's hand lifted up my leg, wrapping it around his waist. He slowly inched his fingers higher and higher until he was under my dress, tickling the lining of my underwear. “Let me show you how badly I want you. Please.”

My knees almost buckled at the sound of his voice. The desperation. I nodded, unable to form words, and his hand slowly slid up more until he pressed his palm against my sex. I squeaked unintentionally, a smirk coming to his face. He rubbed slow circles into my clit, my back arching instantly.

“You're already soaking through your panties... Fuck me.” He grunted.

I bit my lip, “Seeing you jealous is honestly kind of a turn on.”

He raised an eyebrow, “Oh really? You like making me jealous? You like me being possessive of you?”

“I like hearing you admit you like me, so if that does the trick…” I trailed off, teasingly.

He pressed harder into my clit, a moan ripping through me when he did. He moved his mouth down, sucking on my neck in time with his movements.

My hands snaked down his torso, touching every muscle on my way to his belt. I clutched the buckle, loosening his belt from his pants. I slipped my hand inside, cupping his growing bulge. He gasped, grinding his cock into my hand.

He closed his eyes tightly, “Fuck baby, that feels so good.”

My cunt clenched at the sound of his voice, needing him deeply. “Please Colby. Fuck, I want you so badly.”

“I need you too, Y/N.” Colby exhaled harshly, “Spin around for me.”

I glanced at him for a moment, shocked by the hunger in his eyes. I turned around, placing my hands on the counter. The cool surface felt like ice against my hot skin, the hairs on my arms standing on end. I heard a package ripping, Colby sliding a condom on that he grabbed from his wallet. Suddenly his hands were on me, pulling the skirt of my dress up until it rested above my ass. He rolled my panties down, his hands massaging my thighs on their way back up.

“You ready for me?” His voice dripped with an aching need: me.

I breathlessly sighed, “Yes, please.”

He pushed my legs open, the tip of his cock teasing my entrance. I mewled at the feeling, backing my hips up until my ass hit his crotch. He groaned, his one hand gripping my hip while the other rested on my back.

Slowly he glided his cock inside of me, both of us holding our breaths as he did. I stretched around him, his size bigger than what I was used to. He filled me up more and more, my eyes fluttering in ecstasy. His body relaxed against mine once he was all the way in, a shuddering 'fuck' falling from his lips.

“Move, Colby. God, please!” I begged.

His hand moved around me to cover my mouth jokingly. "Shh, you can't be too loud. Don't want Sam and his girl to know what we're doing."

I rolled my eyes, knowing that they were lost in their own world and would give no shits about us fucking in here. Colby smirked against my skin, kissing and nibbling my neck and shoulders. His hand drifted back, running through my hair, tugging lightly. His hips began to move in low thrusts. I bit my lip to not moan loudly, but it was so hard. He felt like heaven, and way better than all of my dreams had imagined.

“God, you feel amazing, Y/N.” Colby whispered lightly, “So wet for me.”

I gripped the counter, holding myself into place as he bucked into me. I moved my hips in time with his, meeting him with each thrust.

His hands cupped my hips, his thumbs rubbing circles into them. “You are fucking gorgeous, baby.”

I hummed a moan, my head lulling back. Colby's hand collided with my ass quickly, slapping it. I let out a small shriek, surprised by the impact.

“Colby!” I giggled, looking over my shoulder at him.

He grinned, his dimples appearing briefly. “Can't help it. Wanted to do that for so long.”

“Really? So you've been staring at my ass all this time?” I questioned.

“Oh yeah. Every chance I get.” He raised his eyebrows smugly.

“Perv.” I joked.

Colby laughed, sliding all the way inside of me and stopping. He pressed me against the counter, his hand drifting down and rubbing my clit. “And you're just like me.”

My eyes almost rolled back into my head from the pleasure. “H-how?”

“You're letting me fuck you right in the same spot Sam fucked you in. They could come down any minute and catch us. You want that to happen, don't you?” He grunted, his voice sounding like pure sex.

His fingers on my clit made it hard to think, let alone respond. I stuttered out a curse. His lips were against my ear, “You're mine from now on, you hear me? No one will ever touch you like this again besides me. Say it. Say you're mine.”

“I-I'm yours.” I whimpered.

“Again.” His hips started back up, fucking me harder against the counter than ever before.

“'M yours.” I slurred, my orgasm growing closer and closer.

He slapped my ass again, “Tell me one more time, darling.” 

“I'm yours! Fuck Colby, I'm yours!” I exclaimed, unable to hold back.

“That's my good girl! Fuck yourself on my cock. Do it.” Colby demanded.

I bounced on his dick, his fingers still rubbing my clit over and over again. I was panting, unable to hold back any noises that escaped my throat. My hand slid down to his hand on my clit, pressing him more into me. I gripped his wrist, my nails digging in.

“You close baby? You gonna fucking come for me?” He cursed, his thrusts picking up speed.

I cried out, “Pleaseeee Colbyyy, I wanna come!”

His other hand wrapped around my throat, lightly squeezing for a second. He taunted, “Shhh, you can't scream, Y/N. Even though I know you want to."

Colby pounded into me harder, guttural moans and the sounds of our skin slapping together filling the room.

His voice was hoarse, hungry. “I'm close, darling. Ffffuck you feel so good!”

I desperately whined back, white knuckling the counter as my high grew near. "I'm gonna fucking-!"

“That's it, Y/N. Come for me. Soak my cock and come!” Colby thundered.

My body exploded into an orgasm, my vision blurring. I cried out in ecstasy and pleasure, my hips bucking helplessly around his cock. Colby picked up his pace, thrusting into me passionately. His husky groans echoed in my ear as he came. His hands dug into my skin, his fingers curved as he rubbed my clit through my orgasm. I shook against him, my body finally relaxing against the counter as my pleasure subsided a minute later.

He rested his forehead against my back, spreading lazy kisses and licks across my shoulders and neck. I smiled, catching my breath slowly. His hands moved, softly caressing my skin as he stood up. He picked me up off the counter, spinning me back to face him. Resting me back against it, his body still against mine. His eyes scanned my face, taking in every detail.

“Hi.” He whispered sweetly.

I grinned, “Hi.”

“You okay?” He asked, lightly brushing my hair out of my face.

“Never better. You?” I giggled.

“I'm great.” Colby pecked my lips, pausing briefly. “I wasn't kidding when I said all of that, you know."

"I believe you." I breathed.

"So... you're still mine, right?” He murmured.

“Of course." I lowered my gaze bashfully, "And you're mine?”

He nudged my face up, our eyes locking. “Absolutely.”

<< part one ||

Will you please post all the date ID suggestions you no doubt have gotten 😂

Well I sure have a crazy, hilarious inbox.... not all ID suggestions though...

He followed her because she was on Fallon. He's not gonna follow someone he just was on a date with 😂

Nah don't think so, you can hardly see the woman at all, so quite impossible to ID

😂 don't know how you can see any age from the bit we see.... and about the hair cut... I don't think so, he's in the back of a pic, it is a bit grainy but it totally looks to me like he just has combed it backwards, it's the same length...

He does need a good hair cut though, the hair is far too lng. hope he goes to Ciona when he's back in London and before he gets on the Sunday Brunch show...

Fair enough, and yes everyone goes crazy when he sits next to a woman. But he can have a date, doesn't mean he jumps into the bed with one immediately.

Yes he posted at 1.15am last night. He can have a date that evening, be out with a woman and get back at the hotel and post before he goes to sleep. Again, why would he sit alone in his room or be with AN all the time? And again, no hair cut

Just combed backwards....

She confirmed it was last night... i posted the conversation. lol at Alex being there, where? does it look that way?? I don't think so. btw. Alex was posting on IG, the story he reposted hours later on.

I don't know what you guys expect when he has a date... that he stays all night with her? He can go on a date, have a nice evening, and go back to his hotel afterwards, no? And get up early the next morning as well, no? Can you have a dinner date or a night out, without ending spending the whole night together? Or is that impossible.

Do I have an agenda? Geesh are you new on my blog... go read before you jump to conclusions about my agenda please, and come off Anon if you want to make these kind of stupid statements. Gosh, your message sounds a bit pathetic, sorry... not sorry.

Random pic? Sorry but why are you all so upset and in denial. Can't the guy go on a date, have a drink with a woman? Am I saying he's gonna marry her? Or take her on a next holiday? Or... whatever...??? What.'s wrong with you people? I don't see a bottle of SS on the table, and I don't think Alex is hiding or just went to the mens room... smh

You mean, there's not any bar or restaurant open in West Village after 5 pm? In NYC?? Uhm... and how did these girls get in to celebrate?

Omygosh are you for real???? Geesh... so in your opinion you need to face each other, or else it's not a date...

Okay people believe what you want, but don't get so effing upset when he's seen with a woman in a bar. He's a single man, he can go on a date. He's not your boyfriend, he' not cheating on you. Don't get into all kind of hilarious denying excuses. Not necessary... He's gonna be back in the UK anyway in a couple of days. So don't get your nickers twisted.

Success Stories ʕ⁠´⁠•⁠ᴥ⁠•⁠`⁠ʔ

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My posts on success stories seem to do well anyways, so here's so more to help motivate you. :')

Revising that my dog didn't run away: this one is more of a tear jerker. So I have a little Pomeranian dog, and for the time being he was being kept outside because we were doing house remodeling that had wood dust and other chemicals in the air that would be bad for him- so I thought keeping him outside would be safe. My dad decided to let him out of his closed area, and for a while my dog was just having fun running around! I decided to take a nap and just relax for the day since I had to do some writing earlier lol. Anyways, after I woke up, it was already late and around 6-7 pm, my dad walks in and he goes "is the dog in here?" while bursting in my room, and I said "no." and he just kinda scrambled off. My gut feeling just KNEW something was up, and I felt like shit for a good few seconds. I decided to try revising in case of the worst case scenario happening - having some more context, our house is literally next to a busy open street, if our dog got loose the chances of him being run over were extremely high. So anyways, after I "revised" (i simply stated "i have nothing to worry about, my dog is safe and in his house that he has outside), I just persisted. Throughout the day my parents and sisters avoided talking about my "missing" dog because they knew if I heard that he was gone, id have a meltdown. However they are not good at whispering or keeping secrets, so whenever i overheard them talking I would just affirm and remained calm. At around 10pm, my sister comes in my room annoyed ASF and this was the interaction:

Sis: do you know what just happened?

Me: Huh?

Sis: Oh...sorry we didn't tell you, *recaps what I just said*.

Me: the dogs missing?!

Sis: no, my dad went to go check in the dogs house and he was in there! He was inside of a hole where there were light cables ...blah blah blah.

So in conclusion for this story: by persisting that my dog never escaped and was in his house the whole time, he was. Simple.

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Having desired fanfictions written: this is more of a funny one that I do but just noticed that I do it. Whenever I join a fandom and absolutely drool over a character, i always want specific fanfictions written for them that don't exist when I join the fandom. So I'm always like "damn it'd be nice to have a fanfiction that does x" and then usually a few hours later a fanfiction with EXACTLY what I wanted is posted. Granted - they sometimes aren't written that well but regardless...they exist 😏🤞

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Remember how I was struggling with feeling pretty? I started using Slade's Incarnated sub to help. For the first few nights I looped that bad boy on repeat all night, and yeah the results were great! My acne faded and I lost tummy fat, and overall I felt so much prettier. For extra context I had some meltdowns before this (three to be exact) where I looked at myself in the mirror and burst into tears because I felt ugly. Now, after reading Slade's description for the sub, I realized that one of the benefits was sorta listed like: this sub works by also you not needing to overused it- which made me stop using it completely for one night. That night that I stopped using it, I woke up with some of the clearest skin I've had in a while and also longer lashes blah blah blah... basically how Slade said the sub would work. It's been a few days where I've done this and I've noticed that the results from the sub seem to be multiplying very well, I've started to feel even better by the day about how I feel and I know what I wanna look like etc. etc. I also used to have an awful neck hump cus of my shitty posture, and now it's basically gone!! My back so smooth now and my posture is also getting better lol dw.

All in all, ive gotten prettier both internally and externally, and i am so happy about it!

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Amy Dunne’s Typology

Intro 

So hey guys I am still working on my unhealthy/healthy typology series and I started think of Amy Dunn’s typology. Personally I had her typed as an INFJ 3w2 sx/so however Ive been thinking about some technicalities. 

Technicality #1- Can an Introverted Types be an E3?

Well yes/no I personally think introverted types can’t be soc 3 since it interferes too much with the core desire of the E3 plus soc 3 method of gaining attention. However when it comes to sx 3 and sp 3 things get a bit more confusing. The sx 3 accommodates itself to the image of desire of the world or the ideal self. Personally I think sx 3 its Amy’s most accurate typing (we’ll talk about other possibilities later) and I do agree that Amy’s FiNe could fit very well with the sx 3 desire. INFJ is in a weird spot with sx 3 because of its use of Fe (and Amy seems to rely on her NiFe allot)  in its structure. For example Daernys Targaryen is another example of an INFJ that sticks to her NiFe and is a soc 2. Sp 3 I think could also fit with introverted types since the sp 3 denies vanity and rejects in the order for hard earned work and don't cling onto extroversion in any capacity. 

Technicality #2- Is ENFJ Amy Dunn a better and more accurate typing? 

Well idk tbh. I could def understand Fe dom Amy being more accurate in some ways however I still think her being an Ni dom makes more sense to me. What are your guy’s thoughts?

Technicality # 3- Could she just be a 5w4 sx/so 

Nope, this is another great example of detachment between subtype and enneagram structure. An E5 is an E5 weather it is a sx,sp or soc their desire dont change just their approach and Amy has only one thing in common with E5 and thats being a competency type. Also rejection type...I think this is just another case of confirmation bias. 

Technicality #4- Could she be a 1w2 sx/so or a 2w3 sx/so 

1w2 sx/so- Its interesting ig but I think it crumbles down a bit after a bit of thinking since she isn't expressive of her anger like an E1, she doesn't struggle with her wrath, and id argue that she doesn't have any form of anger. But idk it feels like a very random typing imo. 

2w3 sx/so- I see where this is coming from but why? not every crazy partner in media is an sx 2...Amy dunno being a positive type is also very very strange to me. 

Conclusion 

- I want to know your guy’s thoughts on this I could see myself changing her typing from INFJ 3w2 sx/so to ENFJ 3w2 sx/so. But thus far I still think INFJ sx 3 isnt very outlandish and it is kinda of possible. 

sis and i have been conducting some research on my friend who we forced encouraged to watch nope and we reached a conclusion: most of the people who think jean jacket is weird/unrealistic (eg: why did it change shape that drastically)/unpredictable AND think OJ's approach was out of character/unrealistic (eg: no one can be that calm) have never had any pets and/or watched nature documentaries. id love to hear ur take on it as well since ur The Animal Tamer (on my dash ofc)

one million thousand billion hundred percent agree that if people don't watch nope and think "makes sense" they probably don't know shit about animals.

the animal / animal handler relationship was the biggest impression nope left on me the first time i saw it, all the analysis came later as i was Mentally Fixating, but the animal stuff is IN YOUR FACE. kaluuya really pulled it the fuck out acting OJ, because his works-with-animals-ness is soooooooooooo overt and believable.

jean jacket's transformation was instantly recognizable to me as a threat display, because it's coming after a lot of understandable ramp up of behavior. animals (usually) don't attack out of nowhere, they have warning stages. beginning of the movie, JJ is placid. the more the haywoods give it trouble, the more it ramps warnings. marking territory (the blood shower) but notably NOT attacking feels like a clear warning, it's a growl. then during the oprah shot, it takes another few warning shots at OJ only to have things not go its way enough times for it to go "alright, clearly you're not getting the message," and flaring the fuck up. i feel like i don't need to explain JJ's animalistic qualities more, it's just so obvious to me lmao.

but i DO get how people can be like "no way would OJ be that calm." i've written about this before and it's a huge part of my job to know: playing it cool is a SKILL. it doesn't mean he wasn't terrified. from everything he'd learned about JJ right up until the point of them facing off, meeting eyes, he a) probably figured ok this is my last ditch thing, play it cool and establish authority over this territorial asshole animal, and b) he literally had nothing to lose at that point but his sister. i think his cool head was a combo of professional expertise and the detachment that comes from "well i'm probably dead either way, let's do this."

Id like to know more cod father opinions do the empires have different widely excepted interpretations among the citizens what is the worst possible way they have told his story and what is the most generous conclusion some one has come to How are the other empires remembered what does jimmy think of the more sympathetic artist or writers Is Jimmy the only one to be seen as a villain or are there other cases of historical misinformation does Jimmy know how Joel died or did he leave before that

Also, in the comments of Part 8 on Ao3, Efield commented this:

"I would like to know more about depictions of the cod father do the different empires have different widely excepted interpretations among the citizens What is the worst possible way they have written his story and what is the most generous possible conclusion some one that didn’t meet him would come to with the knowledge available What do they think of Lizzie if they remember her well then would art of them would focus on the stereotype of good and evil twins or seablings How do they remember the other emperors what does jimmy think of them Would he find some funny I love works that shows how history remembers season 1 emperor’s Was jimmy the only one to be painted as a villain or where there other cases of historical misinformation Is Jimmy a good house guest to Joel does he get along with Hermes"

I have taken both of these as an excuse to write a lot, so here you go!

Now do keep in mind, I know very little about art history except what is taught in basic K-12 schooling. A lot of my theory probably doesn’t make much practical sense. But this is for fun so that’s okay!

In this au, the setting of Empires S2 is a different continent than Empires S1. After the Rapture, many people were killed or displaced from the S1 continent. 1,000 years later during the time of S2, the S1 continent has become habitable and is fully populated. A few S2 members are from the S1 continent, such as Shelby and Pix! All this to say, the historical opinion of the Codfather isn’t local to S2’s nations and probably has a pretty homogeneous perspective from those who live on the S1 continent (which I have been calling the Ruined/Old Continent.) That’s not to say there isn’t some variation that exists!

First of all, there is obviously the one explored in this fic. The general perspective of the Codfather seen by most is “Technically we can’t prove he caused the Rapture, but it’s definitely the most likely outcome so he might as well have done it.” Whatever S1 cultures survived the disaster and the 1,000 years of time probably have changed a lot. They have no connection to the Cod Empire anymore, no reference to its morals or reputation outside of historical accounts. Also, the inhabitants of the Cod and Ocean empires are literally fish and amphibians in this au, and their whole deal is that they only formed civilizations due to the influence of 2 demigods (kinda like in Hollow Knight if you know the lore behind that) so they’re not around to give their side of the story. The various ravines and craters dotting the Old Continent, reminding those who see them of its terrible past, probably doesn’t do much for the cultural conscious as well.

Another perspective is that of Pirate Cove, or more specifically by sailors! I talk about it in this post, but generally it focuses more on the seablings as ocean gods than as historical figures.

There are a few other ideas I have. Maybe Animalia has a different perspective on the Ocean Gods, revering them more as gods of Fish and Amphibians then of water? Also, the art museum referenced a few times: Azelo City is meant to be located in modern day Mezalea. A lot of fan interpretation pictures Mezalea as the arts capital of S1, mostly due to the bright colors and the idea of Joel sculpting clones. I think this culture would have withstood time, so that area might interact with the history of the Codfather more through art, prose, and philosophy more so than anything else.

Some of the above applies for Lizzie too, mostly the sailor lore. I think she is seen as the older and wiser of the two (Older? Yes. Wiser? …they’re both kinda silly lets be honest.) If the Codfather facing upwards represents youth and optimism, the Ocean Queen facing downwards represents wisdom and protection. She is said to be both terrifying and devoted. Maybe nowadays young lovers call their partner their “Ocean Queen” to show their love. It's a little ironic like someone calling you the Juliet to their Romeo, lol.

Jimmy, at this point of the au, probably doesn't agree with the more sympathetic interpretations of him. Even if The Rapture wasn't his fault, he doesn't have very high opinions of himself as a leader. So what does it matter that history sees him as a villain, it's probably deserved. I also don't think Jimmy knows how Joel died, he left before that. We also don't have a time frame for when Joel specifically died. I like the interpretation that he lived past the rapture for a few years before the grief finally caught up to him. (Ironically, by running away to the ocean depths, this is exactly what Jimmy was trying to avoid.)

Maybe I’ll get to some of the other S1 emperors and their legacies another time, as I don’t have many great ideas for most of them. Also most aren’t relevant to this au. Feel free to come to your own conclusions or suggest some!

Also, I have another ask about Hermes and already had sketches in the work before they were asked. The lad is of great importance to me too don’t worry :D

another day, another round of me wracking my brain trying to come up with a good fnaf timeline. this time i came to the conclusion that i should just make an au where i leave out a bunch of stuff at this point if i want to work with my own story 😭

ok this turned into a LONG rant id normally just put on my other blog but as i started here, im just gonna post it here. i also keep forgetting stuff and sometimes i come across a theory/fact that makes me go OOHH im so dumb i forgot. and it changes everything again and its probably happening again here

first, fnaf 2 is where i get stuck every single time. id love to just leave at least the toys out, sorry mangle. second, i just cant wrap my head around the whole "charlie was the first victim" idea because we get introduced to all this where we see the puppet in the toys location and the withereds.. it becomes too confusing for me. is it at the same location? was the puppet with the ogs and the toys were added later? i would say the toys are irrelevant and havent been added until the ogs were withered. anyway, i believe will could have stuffed the kids into the ogs prior to killing charlie, which would make more sense if the puppet was possessed later and then gave them life? whether the toys are or arent posessed is not important to me as much (just confuses me. like if they werent there would it change the story??), or rather it lacks some closure, like the ogs have eventually been destroyed and the spirits let free, but for the other kids (that people say are possessing the toys), we dont even know their names! or how they ended. i always think of the theories how will destroyed the ogs to take remnant from them to use in the funtimes, but nobody ever thinks of the fact that he just gets springlocked right after which would make No sense. the funtimes are an odd thing, i guess you could apply he actually took it from the toys, but why would he? is there proof? if theyre programmed to snatch kids directly, hed have enough remnant and not have to get it from previous animatronics. that said, i believe the SL location and funtimes were made early on, but had to have this kidnap/kill function only after charlies murder because if she was the first and the point of her being the first was that will found out about remnant and possession, he would want to start experimenting with it then. however, i do prefer charlies murder to be out of jealousy towards henry after losing elizabeth, which would mean the funtimes would be existing at this point (because of eliz death). or perhaps the funtimes have been a project of his (i have this little coffin theory. probably dumb, basically just each character is there to hold the body/spirit of each afton family member, baby and ballora are obvs, funfred would be cc with bonbon in the place of the walkie talkie plush to control him.. and foxy for mike, but this doesnt work unless william knows about the posession...) but baby killed elizabeth and he wanted to get her back... wouldnt then finding out about charlie and the puppet be like way too convenient? like hey, this is exactly what you need. ...and how long can a spirit persist within an object until possession using remnant? or this kind of "activation" like in give life.

now this brought me to thinking about springtrap and when exactly was he "revived". as well as other time things.. such as, i thought the spirit "degrades" over time, loses sense of self - but i guess that would apply more after the possession starts. hinted at with scrap baby, she has been baby for so long its no longer elizabeth. but springtrap, and then scraptrap, is william seemingly after decades unless his spirit possessed spring bonnie only around the time they found him? big think

and then back to the general timeline. i cant even pinpoint the very start which bugs me, so it always all starts in '83, (after fredbears existing for a bit) when i assume the bite triggered the nightmare experiments, also closing of fredbears. i think there was a freddys at that time already where the first mci would happen but as i said i like the idea of will stuffing the kids into the withereds. maybe not, maybe i gotta let that go but its just such a nice idea. theyre just there in the back, nobody cares about them, the perfect place. then he can be the one to fix them up into their fnaf 1 glory, but this applies to it even if they were stuffed there much earlier and the withering happened Because Of the decay (probably makes more sense too! so i will try to work with that instead) and you see! no puppet yet. but also no possession. hed fix them up after, put them in their own new location and go ham. as in, he also has the saferoom there with the spring bonnie suit to use. nobody suspects a thing. (i also think the golden freddy/fredbear suit could be there and thats how we got golden freddy) but you see, with this we could just throw fnaf 2 out entirely.. whether we had the withereds or not, it doesnt matter, toys dont bring much to the table other than the bite of 87, no? the puppet could work perfectly in fredbears or freddys, just waiting her turn

see what i have to live with. i already helped myself a ton by accepting that henry is just in jail after the first mci/post fredbears so i dont have to work with him too. he wasnt framed, only in charge as the owner.. and we got fazbear entertainment taking while william has afton robotics. as in, they split at some point (after the bite?) and then he works under fazent in various locations, many times under aliases. Oh which brings me to.

in this year of 2023, they finally made me care about fritz! only because its william. to me. i have no proof! other than the clickteam teaser saying "fritz", but showing dave. (if its not him im fucked.) plus, isnt all we know about him literally just an employee kicked out on the first day for tampering with the animatronics (and smelling bad)? wouldnt william do something like this? get inside, if he cant he will take another identity (a name of one of his victims even) to get in to fuck around with the animatronics. why not just go there as william?? he once owned this place..? WELL now comes another juicy part (oh god crunch is going insane) he got kicked out! he cannot be in the location. why do i think that? midnight motorist. yeah.. okay i now love the idea that rye put out there, in the house its mike and a babysitter or aunt (movie helping with the lore!!!) and the footsteps are golden freddy luring him out (movie again!! its only 2 footsteps because GF doesnt walk!! he floats!!) but that aside, im thinking of the JRs part. this doesnt matter other than a hint at other stuff, metaphors and parallels and such. JR could be fredbears previously, yeah i dont argue with any of that, but it also makes me think of it as a paralell to the toy location. a place he got kicked out of, maybe not just once, perhaps the night he killed charlie he had just been kicked out (for various reasons) which amplified his anger as we see in MM after being kicked out of JRs, ending with him killing charlie (which i think was a tiny tiny bit premeditated in the way he was jealous of henry and his happy little family, now getting this chance) much to think about

note: i dont take anything here too seriously. theorizing is always just fun so if the one person decides to read this and react in a highly negative way, just keep it to yourself. if you have strong arguments against something with proof, do bring them in, i genuinely forget about shit i read like, yesterday. i also cannot "factcheck" everything when after googling i get shit like people on quora telling me that... quote.. william was under the control of the glitchtrap virus since he was 8 years old... umm wrong!! he was forced to eat cement when he was 6!!

okay that was meant to be a closing sentence but i also thought of one more thing. and one more thing!! i was a firm and calm and collected believer of fnaf 1 taking place in '93. then came the movie, making it in the 2000s. and it changed me to the worse! i started reading up on it and found out that its all just a theory that majority latched onto and decided to take as fact. as well as the idea that springtrap was locked in for 30 years. wont factcheck rn but it was apparently 30 years from the first location being closed, not since the springlocking. which means theres no set time between that and fnaf 3. on top of that someone was saying it made more sense for fnaf 1 to take place 10 years after that, so around 2003 instead, and it made sense to me then, so yeahh...

it also ties better to help wanted onward (though fnaf3 happening later would make the previous events more mysterious, why wouldnt they look into the location sooner?) and SB not taking place in like 2050s but 2030s or so (if its true that SB is happening 10 years after the pizzaplex opening). holding onto the game!vanessa is an afton theory even stronger after the movie! i talked about it b4 but had no proof. and so we dont have any literal grandpas making babies, the sooner it goes on the better. if vanessa is ~23 during help wanted, this way shed be born sometime in the 90s or early 2000s (this kinda applies even if HW took place in 2023 right after fnaf3 but since i think it happened sooner then i would prefer to go with the 90s) and. and will could have gotten laid one last time :] and have vanessa. think about it. (yeah how old is he again... it works right? also having to put him into a straight relationship after all of this is criminal, i know. im sorry, i will do better. (lie))

in the next episode, i will go over why the mxes entity is william. good night

p.s if you read through all of this, write me an ask about whos your favorite animatronic

El Mundo: Olena Zelenska, First Lady of Ukraine: "Ukrainians and Russians, we are at a fairly high level of hatred. For a long time, we will be enemies."

ALBERTO ROJAS | Kyiv 22/06/2023 20:39

We go through three security rings with scanner, ID and pat-down. There will be no cell phones, cameras or smart watches inside the same room where Olena Zelenska (Kryvyi Rih, 1978) is standing. Her blonde hair lights up the room like a golden flame. Although she was born in the same city as her husband, they did not meet until many years later. They have two children and attended the same school (Gymnasium Number 95). She went on to earn a degree in architecture, a music degree in piano and has been named one of the 100 most influential people in the world in 2023 by Time magazine. The current First Lady of Ukraine, dressed in elegant navy blue, cracks the knuckles of both hands as she sits down. Clack, clack, clack. Like a good scriptwriter, she clutches the papers in front of her during the first few questions until she comes to the conclusion that her most personal answers are not yet written. Then she looks at the questioner with her green eyes, turns her notes over, and the real interview begins.

Question. What is it like to be the wife of the most endangered man in the world?

Answer. I try to push that thought out of my mind. I focus on the fact that this person is responsible for our country and its people. And that is the most important thing.

Q. Do you perceive that you yourself can be a target of Russia?

A. [Sighs, looking at the ceiling and smiles] I don't want to think about it, but it is hard to forget if all journalists ask me about it.

Q. You, as a screenwriter, could you imagine a story like yours with Zelenski? [Note: This is not a typo. His name was spelt that way in the interview.] I mean, you marry an actor who becomes President of a country that is then invaded by a nuclear power?

A. Well, it's even more difficult because he wasn't even an actor when we got married. We couldn't even imagine that he would become President, let alone of a country at war. What I did know is that he knows how to look for and find ways out where no one else can. He is a very imaginative person, that's why I knew he would come out ahead in any situation.

Q. At what point did you know there would be an invasion?

A. The first news I had of the war was on the morning of February 24, like any other Ukrainian. Until the previous days, we all hoped that Vladimir Putin would be guided by logical thinking, but he was not.

Q. What restrictions do you have on seeing your own husband?

A. There is no set protocol for visits. I never see him at home because he cannot come. In the President's office, I am allowed to see him. Just today, I had lunch with him. This office is the only possible space.

Q. How do you explain to your son what is going on?

A. You always ask me that question, and I understand why. But my children are too grown up to understand what is going on. Sometimes they themselves surprise me by explaining to me what is going on better than I could have explained it to them. It is impossible to keep them in a bubble nowadays. The most important thing is not what I tell them but what they ask me. And what they always ask me is when this war is going to end. It's very painful to have to tell your son that all the things he wants to do will have to wait until after all this is over.

Q. Just as your husband has become a symbol of the Ukrainian resistance, you have also stood out as an image for many women in your country. What would you say to the thousands of Ukrainian women who are fighting the Russians at the front?

A. I would like to express my admiration for the Ukrainian military women. They have voluntarily chosen the hardest way. I am very grateful to all of them. Today I can say that it is also thanks to them that we are here talking 16 months later. When I look at the photo of Ukrainian women in uniform, I cannot help admiring their beauty. I am very proud of them. I wish them to keep their health and strength until we achieve a peaceful future.

Q. Do you feel safe in Kyiv now? Russia attacks the capital almost every night.

A. I am a citizen of Ukraine, and I am afraid like any other citizen of my country. When the anti-aircraft alert sounds, I also go into the shelter. When I am with my son at home, even at night, we try to get to safety.

Q. How has this war changed your own role as First Lady of Ukraine?

A. I didn't want to stop all the work I started to do before the Russian invasion, and that's what I'm still doing. But it is true that in some areas, I have expanded my diplomatic work, even if it is soft power diplomacy. I try to explain what Ukraine is, what is happening here, but in a personal, unofficial way, focusing on the stories of ordinary people. When I have to tell what is going on, I use real facts, things that have happened to people with names and surnames. The data and statistics are already in the press, but I talk about specific people I know. I have realized that this serves to create empathy.

Q. What personal impact does all this have on you?

A. During the first days of the war, every attack hit me very hard. Even at official events, I was in tears. It's not that I have become hardened now, but I have to make every effort to tell the story to the end. In the end, I am human, I have emotions, and I cry. Today, in this very interview, I can start crying. That happens to me many times.

Q. 10 days ago, Russian missiles attacked your hometown and that of your husband, Kryvyi Rih, leaving many dead. How did you feel when you heard about it?

A. When Russian missiles hit any city in Ukraine, there are terrible situations, but when it happens in your hometown, you immediately try to recognize the exact place of shelling. During the first hours, I did not have clear images for safety, but then I already realized what the place was. Of course, I know that house and that street. When I was a child, I passed by that place many times, and it's hard for me to understand that it no longer exists.

Q. You focused your work before the war on the creation of programs for equality and against domestic violence. Is it possible to advance in something like that in the middle of the war?

A. The war deepened all the problems we already had. If we think about the equal opportunity program, this invasion is increasing the problems of mental illness, as well as hearing, sight … . Today, nothing connects us with the Russian society. They have other values. Since we cannot change them, we have to go our own way. For example, we worked to bring forward a law on violence against women, but the Russians overturned their own law. In other words, we are going in opposite social directions. But if we talk about violence, there are also different types of violence that can affect men, such as economic violence. That's why this program is very broad.

Q. Is the European Union the model towards which Ukraine is traveling?

A. Ukrainian society is trying to move towards tolerance towards all its citizens with the model close to many countries of the European Union. Although it is true that many people are not quite ready to accept some processes, such as that two homosexual persons can marry. The most important thing is that the number of those who refuse the existence of same-sex marriages or unions has decreased. There is a cultural transformation, but these are slow transitions. The most important thing is that there are no legal restrictions in Ukraine with people who see sexuality differently. In Russia, on the other hand, they use the word Gayropa to refer to the European Union.

Q. How do you imagine the Ukraine of the future?

A. I am not a fantasist. I understand very well that we have a lot of work ahead of us. I have high hopes for this post-traumatic growth. Thanks to the current difficulties we will emerge much tougher and, therefore, I believe that we will be more successful. For example, it would never have been impossible to undertake painful reforms before. Now we can.

Q. Aren't you going to write a book about this whole experience?

A. I am not going to lie. I have had many proposals to write a book, but I want to find an idea that is original so that I can present everything that has happened in this story. I haven't found that approach yet, though.

Q. Will our generation be able to see Ukrainians and Russians having good relations again one day?

A. It depends on each person. Now we are all at a rather high level of hatred. How long will it last? Nobody knows. After our victory, there will come a time of tears as we remember those who died in the war. Our attitude toward Russia will depend on what we get from the other side, but we don't know how long it will take. There is no scale that can measure that, but it will be very difficult to see the Russians the same as other neighbours. For a long time, we will perceive them as our enemies.

Q. In a Ukrainian TV report, your husband showed his closet to a journalist. It was all green military clothes except for a civilian suit at the end of the hanger. He said that he was saving that suit for the victory day. Do you have a suit ready?

A. Has he already chosen that suit for victory day? Well, I think I will choose it for him in the end. I will prepare the most special suit for that day, but the truth is that I haven't thought about that event yet. Although to tell you the truth, I don't really care about the dress, because the main thing is that the victory in this war will bring the most important moment in the history of that country.

Article

you ever think about how jake moved to la for a job opportunity. and then spent his whole time at that job talking about amir to the point where his coworker had to ask who was obsessed with who and he still didnt get it. and then he moved back because he missed amir, he sat on a beach listening to a frickin shitty playlist amir made him. and then years later he follows amir across the country again, and ultimately stays with him. and then do you ever think about how they didn't talk for like 3 years but then amir facetimed him one day and despite how much jake 'hated' amir calling him he still started up a podcast network with him. do you ever think about how much jake loves amir and would follow him to the ends of the earth but will likely never reach that conclusion himself. and do you ever think about how-

GINGER AND CELERY I DID NOT GO TO BED AT 5:30AM THINKING ABOUT THEM AND WAKE UP AT 7:26AM STILL THINKING ABOUT THEM TO DEAL WITH THIS ASK!! EMOTIONALLY AND PHYSICALLY AND ALL THE LLY'S!!!! HOW DARE YOU!!!!!

no, but i litreally think about it all the time!!!! essay incoming because I'm very long winded!!!

Like you basically said.... Sick Day is, i think, the peak of Jake and Amir being extremely queercoded. not only is it an unironic queer drama plot where they both find unfulfilling love interests and then come back to each other (disregarding any intent of irl janda)... it also simply annihilates any doubt that jake doesn't CHOOSE to be with amir, which basically manufactures the crux of the complexity of their relationship and codepency.

And of course... Everyone asks, yknow, "why do you stay?" when it comes to Jake.

and you're right: he loves amir.

he loves him, of course he does, otherwise he wouldn't do these things for him. and on some level, he must know that. because he always comes back when he has the opportunity to leave. and i think road trip does a great job of conveying that jake loves amir and he knows it. but more than that, i think, actually the finale arc showcases another something that im not sure jake can really come to terms with. it's like, almost beyond love at all. its kinda just that... jake likes, needs, and wants what amir offers his life. and that's absolute destruction and discord and somebody's attention.

without amir, jake is just some failure of a writer at collegehumor who can't get dates, has no fulfilling prospects, and is so insecure he's not even sure who he wants to be. with him, he has a life where things happen, where he has the opportunity to be right and do things because amir is always wrong and getting into things. in other words, jake is a fucking loser. but that's... exactly what Amir is too, except he's has no concept of shame about it. and so jake NEEDS amir. because hes on this same wavelength as him, but he's more right and he's admired and that means he's WORTH something. that, to me, is incredibly interesting.

I think sick day showcases both sides of it - Jake loves amir, he genuinely admires his stupid songs and high voices and idiotic jokes as much as he can't say that - but he also NEEDS him because "he was obsessed with me" and therefore that must mean "im worthy of being obsessed OVER".

and what i find super intersting about that too, is like, as the series goes on, they tend to get a lot more violent with each other with LA being a point where jake was legit letting amir die and even praying for it. one might take this as like, he's being regressed (as especially after road trip) but to me, it almost makes it seem like they have fit these horrible roles that just keep escalating so much that in a sense they are confident they will never be able to leave each other. "i can wish amir death, it's not like he's actually going to die", lol, and "he already knows id choose him, so its not like it matters how mean i am". almost like a weird sense of stability in the most instable way. because it's just straight up toxic.

and so i think that informs my thoughts in terms of amir not seeing jake for "3 years" and then them starting a podcast together miraculously. its like. i think they both realized after roadtrip, finally, that they are not really leaving under any circumstance, and they've kind of come to peace with it (so amir leaving for 3 years is honestly not that weird because he's gonna come back anyways), and they speak this love language of foul-mouthed hatred and malice just because it's how they operate. that's why it feels so damn homely. its because now they both know they love each other, but they're playing their part because that's the only part they know how to play and it works. they dont have to say "i love you" to get that across. and that, to me, is incredibly romantic and fucking insane.

so yes, in a sense, I do think about how. i think about how all the damn time.

𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝒶𝓁𝓁𝒾𝒶𝓃𝒸𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝒷𝑜𝓊𝓃𝒹𝓈 𝓊𝓈 𝓉𝑜𝑔𝑒𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇 ♡ PT.2

Summary: You are a writer only passionate about science, biology (the human body s' anatomy) and anything along the lines of engineering. Your studies is only a part of your many passions and hobbies. Online you place many theorizes and questions where you wish that maybe one who takes your passion to heart could answer with an explanation. Although they never do, sometimes somebody will answer you but its with the most basic and undetailed answer ever! Until one day you come across somebody whiling to answer all your questions for only a small price..

WARNINGS !! : MENTION OF BLOOD AND GORE (warnings may change through different parts) IF YOU READ IN BETWEEN THE LINES YOULL SEE THAT HUMAN EXPERIMITATION IS MENTIONED

YES THIS POST WAS LATE, IM SORRY!! I SAID ID UPLOAD PART 2 TODAY AND I DID BUT ITS LIKE ALREADY BEEN A FULL DAY SINCE I UPLOADED THE LAST PART SO TO ME ITS LATEE!

ILL TRY TO UPDATE DAILY- PLZ REQUEST AND TELL ME YOUR FEEDBACK THANK YOUU ♡ ♡

(Forgot to add but this is a modern au and in every modern au, the place is always teyvet and the region is based from the character the fic is centered around. (For this fic, it's Dottore, a fatui harbinger, so the region is Snezhnaya!)

After exchanging numbers with the Doctor, you wondered:

" I don't quite know who this guy is.."

Maybe it was a bit too early for an introduction, he made his point clear. He didn't have time to always check if whoever he was helping asked a question through their account. The only way he could reach you was through your emails... which you rarely check just that the only time you bothered looking at the new notification was when he sent a message. The site you were using didn't have a private chat function. They had a word and comment limit per accounts per post so if somebody were to be going through a very detailed answer, they wouldn't be able to finish because of the word/character limit. So basically, in conclusion, exchanging numbers was the best idea.

Day by day, you asked questions and as promised, he answered the second you sent them. Although sometimes he'd respond later, but instead of mocking you by saying "While using basic knowledge we're able to figure that..", he'd say "Through my experimentation I figured.."

Although you didn't mind it at first. Since, he mostly answered in this manner when you questioned the success of one of your theories which was only reasonable for him to recreate your ideas to see if they function in the same ways they did when you described them while using your knowledge and imagination. The more you asked the more you wanted to start classes for biology, since your school offered some. So a few days passed and during that period you tried to convince yourself to try to get a decree in biology. Your thoughts got the best of you and so you joined, you tried to make notes of all the knowledge you had just gained on the subject just for the sake of being a bit advanced in your studies. The start of the semester came and of course the main subject of the following classes of the first part of the semester were based within the objective of learning the functions of each organ/muscle in the human body.

You had to learn which was more important and so on. Using what the functions of each organ were, you needed to figure what would happen if only 3 organs of your choice were absent in the human body. In your essay you had to write two paragraph one answering the following questions:

What are the names of the organs? If they were known under other names you needed to list them.

What are the purposes of each organ?

Where are they placed in the body?

Then you had to continue with the help of the answers you got from answering these:

How long will the body survive?

What are the side effects? What are it's effects on the rest of the body, are each part of the body connected to that organ somewhat destroyed?

Why did the absence of the organ cause those side effects?

You found it pretty easy. You searched through your textbooks and after a while you finished. But a wonder came to your head. What would've happened if the organs you didn't chose were absent. What if it was one of the many parts of the brain that got removed? Will the person act differently. Can the absence of an organ bring any form of change to the movement of limbs and the human body in general. So, you asked the Doctor. Now, you felt more comfortable knowing you knew him a lot more then before through the small conversations you had that weren't based around the subject of science.

So after a few seconds after asking that turned into minutes then hours then a few days, nothing, nothing happened. He didn't respond and your message was left on read. You didn't mind it to much since you had other priorities. And, some Doctor who could answer all sorts of questions about himself only if the questions was based on his tastes was not one of your priorities.

Aside from science, you enjoyed arts, doing anything that could satisfy your creativity while yet staying in a peaceful mindset was one of your hobbies. Why? Since you could actually concentrate. You had an average life in Snezhnaya. You knew all about the harbingers due to how many times you've heard one of your close ones talk about their accomplishments. You walked through thick and heavy snow to get to school while wearing layers upon layers of clothing due to the low temperatures of the region then in the afternoon you came back the same way that you did in the morning. Only through walking did you get anywhere. You lived in a village where you grew up in and also knew everybody due to how close the community was. But after thinking about your problem you noticed that it has been a long time since that Doctor had answered your questions. But, the time that came by ever since the day you asked for an answer raised as much as the people going missing did. Day by day more missing posters were hung up. You knew how hated your region was. But, now people are trying to kidnap the people you knew ever since you were a child? Impossible. Many things were going on in your life and it felt abnormal to say. Normally you were always at peace now, you don't know if you're going to be that kidnapper s' next victim and another issue is your everlasting worry for some person who if they were to write a book, one of their texts will suffice for one entire chapter.

But, today felt like a normal day to you. You were going to go to your classes and come back. And, that's what you did. You arrived almost late, you sat down at your seat and listened to the teacher talk about the purpose of the muscles and the name of each ones. By the end you had to come back by walking with your boots through layers of snow. And, once you came back you saw a notification on your phone announcing an up-coming message. You looked at the sender just to the "Doctor."

You jumped on your bed and read through the message. He had describe all the effects of the absence of each organ through a very long paragraph (for each organ obviously). While reading through the message, you noticed how most of them ended up having fatal side effects. He even added what will happen if the human slowly lost all their blood at once and also what would happen if different parts of the brain were to be removed. But yet again, he began his answer with the statement: "Through doing some experimentation I was able to figure.."

So, after reading that you could only ask:

"How do you do your experimentations?"

He answered seconds after:

"Well, I remark all the important organs and maybe veins and muscles and I try to compare their value with their function just to be able to find what will the human body lack of if the organ were to be destroyed. Then I see if there will be any other organ affected by this destruction and compare it to the danger of having that organ harmed indirectly by the absence of the part of the body that got taken away."

You didn't quite understand how that could possibly work. Although using your little knowledge all that he was saying before seemed believable and reliable. So, maybe this was how you can predict what will happen if an organ were to get removed from the body. After some thinking you asked:

"Can I meet you by chance, Doctor?"

"You're In Snezhnaya right?"

"Yeah, I am."

"Then, sure."

Author note: AND IM TIREEDD, so I'll stop... PT.3 MAY be uploaded tomorrow!! ♡ ♡

Thanks for reading! (Plz request)♡ ♡

TELL ME ABOUT ONE OF YOUR AUS BRO ID LOVE TO HEAR ABOUT IT I LOVE AUS

Hell yeah time to talk about my au- *gets the shit kicked out of me by midterms*

Uuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhh oopsie doopsie a month passed ANYWAY

Here's my seperated au with extra steps lol (I intend to start posting about my aus more (edit: LOL nevermind I GUESS) so I'm calling this extra steps au) 

Also i think (?) Jennika and Venus were girl turtles that were supposed to be added in the show and then never got to be so those two are in this au but I know nothing about them so uhhhh my characters now >:3

It's a separated AU where Splinter takes Raph, Draxum gets Donnie, Big Mama gets Mikey, and Hueso takes in Leo.

BUT Splinter KNOWS about the other turtles, he just couldn't grab them in time. So a lot of time is spent searching for the other turtles, hoping he could find them.

In this process he finds a very young, very parentless, Cassandra Jones, and he takes her in too. So Raph and Casey grow up as siblings. 

It's a long time later, Raph is around eight, when they finally do find Leo. And it's not Splinter who finds him, its Raph. So Leo and Raph find out about each other young, but they haven’t known each other since birth. 

Draxum in this au is not a like totally shitty father. I, personally, like to think that if he HAD kept the turtles, that he would have dropped the whole “murder humanity” thing in order to focus on being a father. And in this au, he pretty much does that. 

Anyway, Donnie is still a highly skilled and trained warrior due to Draxum teaching him from a young age, but Draxum didn’t force that on Donnie, Donnie wanted to and so Draxum taught him. Also, Draxum is still working on ending humanity, but its like. A personal project lol. He decided to let Donnie come to his own conclusion about humanity, and for the most part Donnie agrees with Draxum. Until, that is, he meets April (for the second time)

Mikey was found by Big Mama, but she didn’t really raise him. Or pay attention to him at all, in fact. She clearly had a favorite in Assistant (who Big Mama also found), and Mikey was left to kind of… wander the endless halls of the Battle Nexus and (to a lesser extent) the Grand Nexus Hotel. Mikey ends up becoming the champion of the Battle Nexus at a young age. Also, Mikey and Assitant are pretty close (at least when Big Mama isn't looking), and he calls Assistant "Tanny". Mikey isn't really given a name, he's generally just called things like kid, turtle, Big Mama's boy/child, little man, etc. That is, until he becomes Nexus Winner after which he's given the name Champion.

Donnie learns about "Champion" watching the Battle Nexus. He’s got it on idly in the background while he tinkers with something. He brings it up to Draxum, who recognizes him as Mikey. Draxum is banned from the battle nexus so Donnie begins training even harder, with the goal of joining the battle nexus to find Mikey and let him know who he is. 

Donnie enters and makes his way through the battle nexus at the age of 14 years old, and while he doesn’t get crazy far, he makes a pretty big impression for a newbie, and the resemblance to the primer champion definitely helps. He finds and meets Mikey, only to realize Assistant is also a turtle, and upon telling them both that they are all siblings, Mikey flees the Battle Nexus with Donnie. Tanny tries to flee too, but they almost get caught, and Tanny stays behind to cover for them. Mikey hides out with Draxum, and the three of them plan to get Tanny, who they now learn is likely Venus. 

April meets all four turtles in the span of like two months at the age of nine due to a series of coincidences, and then just does not put two and two together until they run into Mikey and Donnie again in this au’s version of episode 1. She knows about yokai and just kinda figured that there were just a lot of turtle yokai running around.

The four boys all finally meet each other in this aus version of Mystic Mayhem. This time it’s Leo, Raph, April, & Cassandra, with Mikey and Donnie not being present for… obvious reasons. April is trapped in Draxum’s lair for longer this time though, and actually runs into Donnie and Mikey. 

Of course, the fight after the Mad Dogs arrive ends up going way worse for them than in the original episode, because instead of 4 v 1 it’s  3 v 3, and both Mikey and Donnie are far more skilled in this version than in the original, and Leo is actually even worse at fighting than in the original show because Hueso didn’t feel like training his child in combat was actually super relevant to his life (which, you know, fair), and so Leo only started training with Splinter at around age 11. But both Mikey and Donnie aren’t fighting at full throttle.

The Lab is destroyed not by Mikey’s lack of control over his mystic weapon, but by an unfortunate combination of the goyles getting thrown around and Leo’s portal shenanigans.

The rest of the episode goes similarly, Mayhem is rescued and the Mad Dogs escape but the lab is destroyed and the oozequitoes are let loose. 

Jennika in this au more or less plays the role Cassandra does in the original show.

But uhhhh yeah that's kinda the basics of this au! I have a version of this post that is much longer and ramble-ier (I know, longer and more rambley than this? crazy) but I tried to get the basics down but I do NOT know how to be concise.

I have a LOT of aus though:

Wait: a future!turts +april and cassandra getting sent to the present au... kind of. its complicated, i am making a post for this one

Rise of the Unsleeping: a crossover au with the unsleeping city. also making a post for this one. 

Rising Fantasy Higher (working title, will probably change it lol): another crossover, this time with fantasy high/the seven. its the rottmnt characters in the world of spyre. I haven't thought about this one as much but i just think the turtles should just get to like. chill with kids their age and go to highschool and stuff. Maybe Augefort isn't the best place for that though lol

DGDT (pronounced digit, short for “Doppleganger Donatello”): Donnie is kidnapped and replaced by a robot copy of himself. But the robot copy doesn’t realize he’s not the real Donatello. Chaos (and drama) ensues.

hhhhhhhhh i love my silly little aus :3

Splat 3 DLC

prefice this by saying NON OF THIS IS CONFIRMED. this is mainly what I PERSONALLY would want to see in the splatoon 3 dlc, and is supported only by my own observations of in-game occurrences, nintendo stuff, and the occasional dream. if any of this does make it into the dlc, id be stoked, but i am also pretty bad at guessing so

What do we know so Far?

Very little! the only thing actual confirmations we have for the dlc is that it is coming, and that its gonna feature marina and pearl in some way as shown in splatoon 3 direct. we haven’t gotten any plot details, what new features it would bring, or even a release date.

if were comparing it to octo expansion, which came out a little under a year after splat 2′s release, we could very well see the dlc be released by august or september. on the other hand, depending on the size of the dlc, it could also take longer, but judging just from how nintendo likes to push out game releases, im guessing itll come sooner rather than later.

What are the biggest theories right know?

Concerning the dlc’s actual content, most have concluded it’s going to be focused on a world tour kinda event. This is hinted at most obviously through sunken scroll 22, which states that “After leaping from Inkopolis Square to the world stage, Off the Hook has found their new side project: performing vocals for a rising rock band as Damp Socks feat. Off the Hook!” the conclusion from this is that DSft.OTH is currently touring, and that the main protagonist of the DLC will get wrapped up in that some how. This is admittedly a very vague and non-solid premise, but seeing that we know OTH is probably going to be a big part of the DLC, its the best we have to go on.

Another more recent conclusion is that nintendo will be introducing a third playable race, in the form of cuttlings. @rassicas has made a post concerning the evidence here, so i won’t go to much into that, but it seems somewhat likely. knowing that nintendo really likes to push the theme of numbers in splatoon (all the references to the number 8 in octo expansion, three idols for splatoon 3, etc.) i don’t think it would be that much of a stretch to assume they would add a third playable race and finally add the last cephalapod species to the game (also would let them have a squid vs octopus vs cuttlefish splatfest)

What do I hope/think is gonna be in the DLC?

Personally, i think the world tour event is not only the most likely option, but also the most fun option. Similar to how the main story mode of splatoon 3 has different islands to explore as you move between kettles, i think having different music venues where you could explore little slices of the bigger splatoon world would be not only fun, but expand the in-game lore as well. It could give the splatoon team an excuse to show diffrent places weve heard about (calamari county, the northern land the bottom feeders come from, etc), without having to model something as big as the squares.

the only argument i can see against this is “how would an antagonist fit into this” and the thing is, i don’t really think there needs to be an antagonist. or rather, i don’t think there needs to be a big bad antagonist. we have already had a world-threatening baddie in the form of mr. grizz, and im hoping that nintendo doesn’t try and push such a serious plot twice, even if it is a dlc. i think an antagonist in the form of a rival band maybe, or some mysterious occurrences that keep trying to ruin pearl and marinas concerts would be a much more believable (and fun) enemy to fight rather than another commander tartar. the reason people loved octo expansion so much was because it stood out from the base game and gave players new lore on the characters they loved. the splat 3 dlc could do the same, by focusing on untapped aspects like the splatbands rather than trying to create the world-defying mission octo expansion had

Speaking of the bands, i do find it interesting that nintendo recently localized the splatbands as well. Splatbands have been around since splatoon 1, but only were localized now to english and given americanized names. along with having harmony/paruko suddenly showing up as a shopkeep, i am hoping this is signaling that the splatbands are gonna play a larger role in the actual games. I don’t think nintendo is going to go as far as to model everyone, BUT i do think it could have the potential to be the collectable item/lore in the dlc. instead of getting sunken scrolls/mem cakes from completing diffrent levels, i think band merch would be a much cooler collectible that also ties into the world tour theme. having a diffrent opening band at each location that you could then collect merch of would give an excuse to finally flesh out the splatbands in game and present the lore to a wider player base.

i think the splatband localization could also tie in a different way however. walking around the square, i find this building next to man-o-wardrobe crush station weird.

its just stand out from the other non-enterable buildings, being so prominently placed next to two other shops, and also looking like its closed off for renovations. why have this building right next to the other two on the strip?

it could be possibly hinting at another store. while i did struggle to think about what else the game could possibly sell the player, i saw a post that presented the idea of a music store where you could buy cd/vinyls to pick which songs play during your turf and anarchy battles (i cannot find the post, but when i do i’ll link it here). i think this would be a great choice for a dlc shop, since picking the songs played during battles isn’t a game changer like new clothes or weapons, and rather works more as a quality of life improvement. and again, this could offer a way to give more splatbands lore in-game, with either descriptions or fun facts given when you purchase a cd like the op proposed.

tldr: i think the dlc is gonna be a world tour that focuses on the splatbands and introduces cuttlings as the new playable species whatever the dlc does turn out to be, i really hope it’ll be fun. it does have some high expectations to live up too seeing as how well octo expansion was recieved, but im hoping it'll do what splatoon does best: release some new banging tunes, and hint at gay cephalapods

Mr and Mrs Liars Chapter 12

Chapter 11

Attention: Mention of Alzheimer's disease.  -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------     *MC POV* I offered to cook dinner while Jake worked on creating a fake ID.  I haven't seen Peter in a long time. The last time we saw each other was because of Lilly's video. They sent to talk to me because he was a familiar face. He couldn't get the truth out, I lied so he wouldn't know I was looking into Hannah's disappearance. Although later, he found out that I was somehow related to her, only I lied to him again saying that I was actually a friend of one of her group of friends. I never understood how he believed me.     "Too innocent when it comes to me…" I mutter to myself. I finish cooking and place the food on two plates, taking it into the living room, where Jake is on the computer.     "Here you go." I set the plate and cutlery aside.     "Thanks." He puts the computer aside and decides to eat. Well, he has learned to take care of himself and put work aside. Too late for that. "Hmhm... Delicious."       "You're exaggerating," I let out a small laugh. "Okay, let's talk about Peter."     "Did you know he was involved in the case?" he asks as he wipes himself with a napkin.     "No, I know about some cops, but not about him." I says, grabbing some food before popping it into my mouth.     "So maybe he's on the case."     "It would be impossible to imagine." I think a little about that man and hug myself. "I mean, he's like an uncle to me. When my parents died, he tried to clean my image because they all the talk about me."     "But that has nothing to do with what happened," he reminds me. "MC, you more than anyone that you should not judge anyone. "     "I know... "     "Maybe he didn't show up in front of you on the case because he knew you could find out something weird was going on?" I set the plate aside, my stomach churning. It would have been a good strategy, but planned by him? Impossible, I don't see him capable. But he was the one who kept all the evidence of that dead man. At least he has to know something.     "I'm just trying to make theories, MC." I look at Jake after hearing him. I hadn't realized that I had been totally thoughtful, "You don't have to get angry."      I sigh, nodding. Yeah, okay, let's not jump to conclusions, I haven't asked Peter about the case yet.     "When we talked to Hugo," I look up at Jake, listening to his story, "I was reminded of the old couple who lived in the same building as my mom and I."     "Did they have Alzheimer's too?" I ask, following the theme to relax.     "The woman, she was the one with it." He places his hands under his chin, lacing their fingers together. "I ran into her going up the stairs, she thought I was her son."     "That... It's very sad."     "Yes, I don't deny it." Now he is the one who is thoughtful. It's like we switch emotions sometimes "But back then, I think I did her a good favor."     "Oh yes?"     "Her son died in a plane crash a few years ago" he sits up a little, his eyes fixing on mine "and her illness got worse after that. She gave me a little fear at first that she would confuse me with another child and that she would want to bring me into her house, until her husband appeared for her and explained everything to me when she returned home."     "It must have scared you to think she was going to kidnap you."     "If I hadn't screamed, her husband probably wouldn't have noticed." he smiles crookedly, remembering that. "Her husband, then, told me that she was very sick and that if he could sometimes talk to her, keep her company when he wasn’t at home. I offered to help, since I had never had grandparents, it was an opportunity to have some. "     "That's so sweet..."     "You could say so," he sighs. "The moments I spent with that old woman, listening to stories that she came to remember, were quite entertaining. There were other days when she didn't recognize me as Jake or as her deceased son, so I had to leave it for another time the visits.” He takes a breath, as if he feels heavy. I can see it was something important to him. "The last time I saw her, she had a moment of clarity. She remembered that her son was dead and the time we spent together watching old movies or just listening to her talk about her. She thanked me for all the company I had offered her. "    "And the next day she died, right?"     "I remember my mother hugging me when I found out about her death and how I couldn't stop crying." I give him a sad little smile. I'm glad her mother was still alive back then. "She was trying to calm me down all night. I had established a bond with that old woman as if she really were part of my family."     "At least you made her happy, Jake." I took his hand gently and stroked it, never taking my eyes off him. "I'm sure she was very happy to have met you."     "I hope so..." We stood for a while looking at each other.     "Thank you for telling me more about yourself," I sigh happily. "Do you have more stories to tell me?"     "In time, I'll tell you more." He gives me a little wink and I laugh. "Okay, pause over." He clears his throat and goes back to professional mode. "Do you think Peter will ask me any questions?"    "Well," I take my hand away slowly, keeping my composure, "he's always been the kind of guy who hid my escapades when I was in…Dangerous places-"     "Dangerous places?"     "Not the topic now," I answered quickly. "I'm sure if we go and tell him any lies, he'll believe me."     "I'm still thinking you didn't know he was on the case." I shrug, not knowing what to think about it.     "Yes, I'll admit in the end that it's weird… But as you know, there wasn't any information I could work with." I sighed, moving the food around with the fork. Suddenly I wasn't very hungry. "And if there was something, who knows who hid it? Peter? My father? But why?"     "We'll find out."     "I hope so... "     After doing the dishes and leaving Jake to work on the ID, I go back to my room and get on my phone, checking to see if I have any messages. Jessy was apologizing to me again.  It's better to talk to her seriously. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- MC I need a clearer answer Did Jake really ask you not to tell me anything?  Jessy Yes 😔  MC Did you tell him I was going to marry Phil?  Jessy Well of course! I told him everything I wanted to tell him for all these years! How mad I was at him for leaving you!  MC In other words, even so, he wanted to see me…  Jessy He hasn't forgotten you, MC But please, don't do something crazy... Phil loves you very much You did him good  MC I know… What crazy thing do you want me to do?  Jessy I don't know You both never finished things the way you should So I think your thing continues ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I bite my lip reading her words. Of course it continued and even more knowing the truth, that he was kidnapped. He had been taken away from me. How could I not be confused knowing that it wasn't because he had left me? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- MC Wow! You look like my girlfriend  Jessy It's what you missed 😤  MC 😂 Well, you don't have to worry about me cheating on Phil Jake and I have officially broken up  Jessy What? And how are you? It must have been hard 🙁  MC I'm fine I've taken a weight off my shoulders I mean… It's official that ours is over  Jessy I AM HAPPY TO KNOW IT! This will do you good to continue with your life! Goodbye Jake! 👋👋👋 In the romantic sense, of course! I want him to stay with us!  MC I also Although surely he will be busier than us He has a job more important than all of us put together ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I keep thinking about what I had written. Now, Jake was free… A good job, salary, a duplex, he was still handsome, he would surely find a girl as soon as we were done with this. Maybe I could even help him date Aleena. Not that I like her, but… She has shown interest in him and… who knows? Maybe she's a better girlfriend than I am and she doesn't complain about stupid things on the computer. And since they would be busy with work all the time, they would only see each other at night... When they would be most desire to see each other...  The notification wakes me up from my thoughts and from wanting to do something I didn't want to. Grateful to Jessy. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jessy Is it that now we are going to be less than him? 😒  MC No, but we can take advantage of him paying us for a dinner for the whole group 😘  Jessy OMG! Do you want his sisters to kill us for taking advantage of him? 😂  MC It's a risk you have to take for a good meal 😜 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I laugh out loud, imagining pranking Jake that we all forgot the money and he had to pay.  I want to be able to be in a group with him, as we had dreamed of for a long time.  I'd love to…  I would love to be able to laugh in a group with Jake... *Jake POV*  A smile escapes me as I hear the MC in the room laughing. It was music to my ears.  I had never told anyone the story of that old woman, I think not even my old friends. It was something I wanted to keep for me. Like the story of my mother and me always moving.  I want to be able to tell MC all the stories from my past that I could never tell her. There was only the exception of telling her about my mother, as she did by telling me about her parents. It was fair. One day, we'll sit down and talk about everything I've never told her. Both the embarrassing stories and the sad ones. I listen to the cell phone and activate the chat on the computer. My sisters. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hannah How is our favorite older brother?  Jake I'm the only one you have. :)  Lilly What do we know for now  ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lilly still seems bitter about what happened. I find it normal. I still wonder if it was the answer I wanted. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lilly How are you two doing with this report?  Jake Well, she's doing great. You know MC, she is good at talking to people.  Hannah Hey Jake… Lilly and I were wondering if this isn't going to be a little complicated for you guys   Jake Why do you say that?  Lilly Well, you had a long relationship that you screwed up  Jake Thank you Lilly.  Lilly Don't take it the wrong way, I'm trying to let you know Jessy has told us because we are your sisters Jake, you should have told MC You know better than anyone that she would have done anything to help you  Jake And that would have put her in danger. Hannah In danger or not, you know very well that MC would not have stood idly by if she had known That she would have even waited for you  Jake Well now it's late.We have officially broken up. Although there was no longer anything to break if she had already made her life.  Lilly Jake, look Hannah and I have been talking to each other, keeping the group out of the way And we think that if something happens between you, that we will support you 🙂  Hannah You are both very important to me And I want your happiness So, if in the end it turns out that MC changes her mind and she doesn't want to get married for you Know that we will stand in front of you to defend you  Jake Thank you both, but really nothing is going to happen. It's over. MC and I are just friends. And we'll still be friends. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  I read the word 'friends' as if it were an end to everything I had done to be with her. I want her to be happy with the person she loves. I no longer paint anything in her life. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lilly If it is what you have decided, then we will not insist  Hannah As long as you're both happy with your lives, then we'll stop worrying.  Jake Thanks to both of you. :) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  We say our goodbyes and I ruffle my hair, thinking about they words.  It was a relief to know that they would support us. The bad thing was that it was never going to happen.     “It's as if they expected it more than I did.” I let out a weak laugh, grateful for my sisters' support. ”Let's get back to work.” Chapter 13