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#obey me shitpost
temis-de-leon · 3 days
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MC deadass writes with hooves.
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They grab a pen with hooves and just do stacks of homework.
I don't even do my homework and I have fingers.
MC walks, eats, messages and writes with fucking hooves.
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Mc: I love you
Satan: are they talking to Cerberus again?
Asmo: he brought them a dead pride Demon
Satan: damn can't compete with that
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zephyrchama · 2 days
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mr. krab's first dime Mammon's first grimm
Mammon freaks out one day and goes rampaging around the house, screaming about his grimm being stolen. He tears apart his room, the common spaces, and is making his way towards Leviathan's room next. That nerd is always nagging Mammon to pay him back, clearly he must have stolen it.
You try to calm Mammon down. Maybe he misplaced it? Maybe he spent it and forgot? Mammon says he would never spend it - that's his first grimm. The first hard-earned cash he ever made. It's special.
He's about to punt Levi's door into oblivion when you grab him and he stumbles and this somehow falls out of his pocket.
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"My first grimm! Oh Grimmy, I'll never lose you again!" "That's a grimm?" "The Great Mammon's been in business for a long time."
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Barbatos simps be like:
“I want that barbussy-“
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notcreative360 · 1 day
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Mammon: *Finds Barbatos laying down on the sofa, with a blanket on* What the fu-
MC: He found a rat in the kitchen, and came here to crash for the night without even asking..
Mammon: And you're just gonna let him!?
MC: Yes.
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l-mint-l · 2 days
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warper-in-training · 2 days
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bestie you took my virginity on Lesson 2-13 OG Obey Me wdym
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What are the brothers spice tolerances?
I feel like Beel could be fine with a ghost pepper but Asmo would be shedding tears over a bell pepper (we love our poor little drama queen)
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authormars · 3 days
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Is there a game Levi refuses to play?
Any dating sim that's only women. He can't handle that amount of boobs
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boozye · 6 months
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:3 *approaching violently*
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anintrovertedechoe · 1 year
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Lucifer: who the fuck took my demonus i just wanna talk
the brothers knowing that whoever did is fucking dead:
MC: it was me.
Lucifer: what.
MC: it was me.
Lucifer: why??? you literally can’t even get drunk off it????
MC: it tastes like capri sun and i miss it you whore
Lucifer: what the fuck is a capri sun
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devildomangel · 1 month
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MC who was sad that they didn't get to see the Solar Eclipse so Beel and Belphie decided to recreate it for them.
-MC, wearing sunglasses and sitting outside the HOL-
Lucifer: MC! What in the nine circles are you doing out here?
MC: I'm watching the eclipse.
Lucifer: We don't even have a sun in the devildom
MC: Shhh! It's starting!
Beel, Wearing a cardboard cut out of the sun: *Standing still*
Belphie: *Wearing a cardboard cut out of the moon, passes by Beel*
MC: Hell yeah
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whatever-fanfics · 6 months
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Headcanon that the demons and angels don't have that instinct when somethings wrong.
MC *feels the hairs on their arms stand up*: Somethings wrong
Solomon *feels a pit in his stomach*: I agree
Demons and Angels: What the fuck
*Something goes wrong*
The Demons and Angels: What the F U C K 🤯😱🤯
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cosmicstarlatte · 1 year
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Diavolo: Do you have representation?
Mammon: I call upon my lawyer MC!
MC: My client is innocent!
Diavolo (pinching MCs cheek): Of course he is, case dismissed!
Lucifer: Lord Diavolo there's crisp clean video of Mammon stealing from-
Diavolo (petting & cuddling MC): MC said he's not guilty, so he's not. What's so hard about that?
Lucifer: MC do you handle murder cases?
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katboykirby · 1 month
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notcreative360 · 14 hours
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Ok, so this has been going around my mind lately.. Did Belphie kill Mc twice? Or just once? Cause, Belphie choked Mc to death over at the attic. But then, there is the other MC that Mammon held in his arms, did Mc in Mammon's arms die too.. or did they just poof before anything happened else happened..? Like what do y'all think?
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