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#Tim drake
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Bruce would have interesting ways to discipline his kids.
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Bruce: Listen to me, Damian! You can not steal my car and drive across country to visit Jon.
Damian: Then why do I know how to drive! And my mommy says I can! You don't own me!
Bruce: Young man, when you are under my roof you will follow my-
Damian: No I don't.
Bruce: If that's how it's gonna be. *Draws a circle around Damian* Stay there for five minutes.
Damian: D-d-d-daddy?
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Dick: *swinging from the chandelier that has been pass down in Bruce's family for generations* I'm gonna swing from the chan-
Bruce: Get down here this instant!
Dick: I'm not doing anything.
Bruce: Richard Grayson
Dick: You're not my dad!
Bruce: *brings out a bag of m&ms*
Dick: What are you doing? Those are mine?
Bruce: *opens it slowly*
Dick: Bruce?
Bruce:*eats one*
Dick: STOP, I'm coming down. Don't eat them!
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Jason: You can't make me. I'm not going to the party.
Bruce: *head vein throbbing* This is important. You can't skip this event.
Jason: *shrugs* You'll have to carry me.
Bruce: *takes a deep breath and walks away*
Jason: ahah, baby.
Bruce: *comes back with a bottle of castor oil and a spoon*
Jason: You sick sick man. Fine I'll go.
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Bruce: Tim you disappoint me.
Tim: I didn't think it would blow up the Batcave. Or make mustard gas. Or create a sinkhole.
Bruce: *sighs* I have no choice. You going on a nature retreat.
Tim: Bruce!
Bruce: Over two weekends. With the Boy Scouts.
Tim: *tears glisten in his eyes* Bruce...
Bruce: As a junior member.
Tim:
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Bonus
Alfred: Right! That's it, Master Bruce. *Pours a spoon of castor oil8
Bruce:
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cassandracain52 · 2 days
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And people say Jason doesn’t think of Tim as his brother smh
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ghost-bxrd · 2 days
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Prompt:
Jason insists on being the bait for a joint mission with the Bats. But the moment he starts “screaming” during the interrogation process, Batman calls the whole thing off and smashes right through the window and into the first thug.
Absolutely nobody is surprised by this development. Except Jason.
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frownyalfred · 2 days
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Gotham quietly, incrementally made Tim Drake 5’10 instead of the 5’8 he was supposed to be and I stand by that headcanon.
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kartsie · 2 days
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Cool (cringey) older brother bestowing wisdom to his little bro
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bruciemilf · 1 day
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heyy, I had a dream of the Waynes having beef with irl celebrities (mainly the Kardashians since I personally don't really like them) and wanted to know if you think that there would be this kind of rivalry between them if they were to co-exist
(sorry if this is worded weirdly, english is my second language, and I'm still really tired, lol)
OH! This gave me an idea. Batfamily + celebrities they have parasocial hatred with.
Bruce: Kim Kardashian (obvious reasons, but I think it’d be so funny if he hates her because she tried buying his mother’s pearls for the Met Gala. )
Tim: Drake; He hasn’t had a second of peace since Not Like Us dropped. Jason has that playing over coms at 100 volume.
Dick: Chris Evans. He lost best butt in America contest to him (As nightwing) and hasn’t been the same since. No one knows why Bruce Wayne’s son hates Captain America so much.
Jason: JK RAWLING. He hates that woman with every inch and beat of his being. Wrote a 100,000 K word fanfiction about Harry Potter transitioning out of spite. It got a movie adaptation.
Damian: Taylor Swift. “It’s like listening to yogurt.”
Alfred: Gordon Ramsey (they had a cook off and he lost. ) also, queen elizabeth. Ominously sipped tea while her death was announced. Probably came to the funeral and watched in all black, from the sidelines, in a huge hat.
Stephanie: Adam Sandler. “The bitch stole my look!”
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spider-jaysart · 1 day
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Very silly something hereee
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(Click for better quality)
He ain't surviving lolll
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incogneat-oh · 2 days
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Early morning Tim! (redraw of this)
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cocomuffy · 2 days
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Dick: So you like, were in that Lazarus pit...
Jason: Yes?
Dick: And it like... healed you of everything and... it made you brand new and-
Jason: Get to the point..?
Dick: How do you STILL HAVE KNEE SCARS?!
Jason: What do you mean?
Jason's knee scars from the Boy-Robin Boy-Shorts™:
Jason: HOW ARE THEY STILL THERE?!
Dick: AND WHY DO I HAVE THE SAME ONES?
Jason: We have to talk to Tim and Damian. This might be a Robin thing..
*they do so*
Tim: Oh, those? Yeah, you guys have had those since you were little. They're from the lack of pants.
Dick: How do you-
Tim, maniacally: I have so many videos of you all falling flat on your faces and scraping your knees...
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d3jha · 3 days
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I feel like the bats have walked off Life threatening injuries like
Clark: batman ermm... he got a hole there
Bruce: And? *beating The belief of God into an alien.*
Wally: NIGHTWING!
Dick:what
Wally WHAT? YOU JUST GOT SHOT
ROY: Did I just here your bones crack!?!
Jason:oh yah just my ribs
Roy:Jason why do I see a gunshot wound near where your rids are Broken
Kon:...
Tim:what?
Kon:how the fuck are you alive.
Tim: <who just fell of a cliff> Spite and pettiness
Jon:Damian... there is a knife in your back
Damian: it's not important
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incorrectbatfam · 3 days
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Rich people punishments for the bats are like "you have to fly Spirit to our second vacation cave"
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Here We Go Again
Tim-DannyTimDANNY started down at himself as his mind re-organized itself. Memories he didn't have before suddenly there in his head.
A whole lifetime as someone else another teen hero Phantom, his other family, friends,growing up
The Accident his death.
Protecting his town
Fighting ghosts
Fighting humans
Dani
Telling his parent
Becoming an adult
Becoming the High Ghost King
He blinked, something was missing
What was wrong? Why was he here in another life remembering now. Both his lives meshed together inside his head, everything finally sliding into place until he could almost hear a *click* and he no longer felt like two different people in one body.
He was Tim, Red Robin who used to be Danny, King Phantom.
A flash of green caught his eye, looking up he saw a small green note
Danny, You will understand soon enough,as to why you are remembering now, try once more in your efforts, 100th times the charm or in this case Dani's rebirth. Be safe, gather your strength. Return home safely young King C.W
Looking up past the note he saw his last failed attempt at cloning Kon, stepping forward he reached out and changed the DNA sample now being his DNA in the mix.
"..."
".."
"."
" SUCCESS "
~
Danny-Tim: * Effectively taking over the LOA and getting Bruce back with a baby strapped to his chest*
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Danny-Tim: *Both him and Dani wearing sunglasses while he flips off the LOA base as it explodes in the distance*
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Danny-Tim being the best dad to Dani while the Bats are trying to figure out just what the hell he has been doing and
"Oh my God is that a baby! You're too young! How did it happen!!!"
Danny-Tim now mentally well into adulthood: *deadpan* "Do I need to give you The Talk?"
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Kon/Bats seeing Dani floating: "UM!?!"
Danny-Tim is once again a half-a after some plot convenience with the LOA and the Pits: " Oh she gets that from my side."
*start slightly floating in the air*
"See?"
"Since WHEN can you do that?!"
"Since always, keep up"
~
Danny-Tim & Dani:
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The others
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~
Just an Idea
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ky-landfill · 2 days
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wil-fae · 2 days
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i think im hilarious
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tsuyakiku · 2 days
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theaceofarrows · 2 days
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Bruce: Has anyone seen Jason and Damian?
Tim: That went out
Bruce: For what?
Dick: Something about Jason breaking a whetstone- don't ask- and Damian demanding he replace that
Bruce: We already have a whetstone for the batarang
Tim: Yeah, but Damian said and I quote "My katana was forged by greatest bladesmiths the League of Assassins has to offer, that cheap rock will not go anywhere near it"
Bruce: ...That does sound like Damian
Dick: Yep. So now we're just waiting on them
[5 minutes later]
Tim: [looks at his phone and starts laughing]
Tim: You guys are not gonna believe this
Dick: What?
[Shows a trending video of Jason walking across a parking lot with a bag in one hand and a screaming Damian under his arm, before noticing the camera and saying, "don't worry, he's mine I'm not stealing him." *pause* "if I was gonna take one, it definitely wouldn't be this asshole"]
Bruce: [tired sigh] Sadly, I can believe it...
Dick: Well, at least he got the whetstone
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