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dragonpyre · 2 days

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Reverse Robin au but the ages aren't changed. Just adoption order.

#bruce rocks back up in gotham with a baby damian and immediately starts his crusade as batman #or maybe he rocks back up #takes in Duke after the first major villain attack #and then a few months later damian gets dropped off #then so on and so forth #until 12 year old dick grayson performs in Gotham with his parents at Haly's Circus #aka Bruce Wayne just has a lot of essentially toddlers #in my mind it's battinson which makes this even more funny #dc #text post #reverse robins #batkids #batfamily #batfam #batdad #bruce wayne

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fanaticalthings · 17 hours

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I really like the idea of the bat kids designating Dick and Jason's apartments as sibling gathering spots but for opposite reasons.

Sibling needs some comfort? Some eldest daughter advice? A shoulder to cry on or just a lil getaway spot from the chaos of Gotham? Dick's apartment is perfect.

But if a batkid wants to complain, maybe wants to talk shit about Bruce, or maybe even wants to discuss a lil felony in a judgement free zone? Jason's place it is.

And I like to imagine that while Dick readily keeps his doors open and reminds anyone that they can drop by anytime, it's the opposite for Jason.

Dude's got his place riddled with traps and locked up to the high heavens. He makes it obvious he doesn't want visitors, and vaguely insinuates that there are bombs rigged somewhere in his apartment so there's a always a 50/50 chance you might get blown up if he's feeling particularly bitchy one day.

But does that stop his siblings? Absolutely not. Unlike Dick (who assigns himself as the guiding older brother), Jason has been forcefully labelled as the older sibling you go to if you need to complain and stir up havoc. The hundreds of traps in his place mean nothing. And it's worse because Jason is never prepared for when someone drops in.

-----

[Jason, 3 hours into his sleep, blearily waking up to a weight on his chest at 4am]:

[Damian, perched atop him, eyes dead-centre locked onto Jason without blinking]: Hello, Todd-stop screaming it is unbecoming-I just came to tell you that father won't allow me to adopt another stray I found on patrol.

Jason, half-asleep and like 70% sure he's hallucinating: Wha-

Damian: I need you to blow up his car.

Jason:

-----

[Jason, arriving home after a 6 hour patrol, exhausted out of his mind, turning on the lights]:

[Stephanie, previously baking brownies in the pitch black darkness before Jason arrived]: Oh hey! Just thought I'd drop by, y'know, for fun.

Jason: Bruce yelled at you again.

Stephanie: Bruce yelled at me again.

And yes, while most of the time, it ends up as wholesome sibling bonding, sometimes the other batkids just feel like inconveniencing Jason just whenever, because what are siblings for?

[Jason waking up and seeing all of his traps and security systems disarmed and very deliberately broken in a way where he'll have to replace all of them instead of being able to reactivate them]:

[Jason, immediately dialing his phone angrily]: Tim, I swear to GOD-

-----

[Jason giving himself a rest-day and cooking some meals]:

[Dick somersaulting in through the open window unannounced (he missed his brother)]: Whatcha up to, littlewing? :>

Jason: GET OUT-

-----

[Jason casually reading a book, feeling a sudden chill up his spine]:

[Cassandra standing in the corner without so much as an exhale, watching Jason intensely. Who knows how long she's been there]:

Jason: Are you here to kill me

Cass:

Jason: Just make it quick.

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incorrectbatfam · 3 days

Conversation

Tim: Jason, what’s your plan for dealing with this?

Jason: Well, Plan A is what I call "Operation Ignore It and Hope It Goes Away".

Tim: That’s it? What the heck is Plan B?

Jason: Plan B is to keep trying Plan A.

#submitted by anonymous #source: brewster rockit #tim drake #red robin #jason todd #red hood #batfamily #incorrect batfamily quotes #batfam #batboys #batbros #batkids #batsiblings #batclan #batman family #incorrect quotes #incorrect dc quotes #dc comics #submission

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theaceofarrows · 2 days

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[Nightwing and Robin Jason showing up to a GCPD crime scene]

Robin: Okay, everybody stand back. The professionals are here

Nightwing: Robin, be nice. They're just doing their job

Robin: If they're doing their job, then why are we here?

Nightwing: ...

GCPD: ...

#jason todd #dick grayson #robin jason todd #nightwing #incorrect batfamily quotes #batboys #batbros #batkids #batfamily #batfam

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potatoesarecheese · 2 days

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I refuse to believe that bruce is a bad dad. I don't care how good the art, the story, the drama-- if a comic makes bruce a bad dad, I'm not reading it

you can't make me

#bruce wayne #batman #dc comics #batfam #batkids #if I can't have my comics I will stick with cartoons #i will die on this hill #I will quite literally burn this world to the ground before reading those comics #jason todd #dick grayson #damian wayne #tim drake #why does this man have so many goddamn children #im not complaining #I think #stephanie brown #barbara gordon #cassandra cain

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wondersinwaynemanor · 3 days

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Tim, who out of nowhere, enters Jason's safehouse through the window.

Jason, arranging his books on the shelf: Doesn't mean I'm back for family brunches or whatever the fuck you guys do, doesn't mean you get to do that.

Tim, unbothered, approaches Jason: I have something to tell you, Jay.

Jason, looks at Tim for the first time: Which is? And Jesus, Timmy, don't put your dirty shoes on the clean rug!

Tim, grins: I'm getting better at cooking!

Jason, doubtful: Really?

Tim nods.

Jason: You asking Alf for lessons too?

Tim, grins wider: By playing mobile cooking games.

Jason, blinks: Uh.... Suuuure. But why come to me?

Tim: To show you. Duh.

Jason, very doubtful: Okayyy.

Tim: I'll make it a surprise even! You go on do something outside then I'll have some food ready when you get home.

Jason, shakes his head: I think it's better when I'm here and-

Tim: Trust me, Jay!

Jason: This isn't a prank or something, right? Dickface didn't pay you for this?

Tim: I'm here on my own will.

Jason, sighs: Alright then. Make something quick. I'll just go to the store and get something for Roy.

Jason, before exiting: And if you burn my books.... The safety of my gun will be useless, Timbo.

minutes later, Jason gets an alarm from his safehouse.

there's smoke coming from the pots. a spatula is on the floor. some sauce of some kind is on the cream colored walls. but thankfully, the place isn't on fire. yet.

Jason, enters the kitchen: What the fuck just happened, Tim??? You said I could trust you.

Tim, with bloodshot eyes and messy hair: WHERE ARE MY BOOSTERS? WHERE ARE MY UNLOCKS? WHERE ARE MY UPGRADES???

Jason, already turning off the stove: The fuck--Timmy, you are not playing one of the games on your phone right now!

Jason, picking up the utensils on the floor: This is the real world and there are no boosters, unlocks and fucking upgrades!!!

Tim, grabbing Jason by the shirt: You lie!!!!

meanwhile in Jason's safehouse.

Jason: So the clone is the solution for Tim's meltdowns. When did they become a thing?

Roy, chuckles: I think they've been together for quite some time, Jaybird.

Dick, sighs: Apparently. And I already told Timmy about those games in his phone. He gets too passionate.

Jason: Too passionate isn't the right word, Dick. He nearly burned down the place.

Dick: He wanted to impress you, Jay!

Roy, smiles: At least Lian's got some other playmates aside from me and Jaybird.

they watch as Lian pours tea on Tim and Kon's toy cups.

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ryemiffie · 3 days

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More quotes from my day as batfam incorrect quotes:

Tim: Wow, you actually just gave me a good idea.

Jason, delirious and staring at nobody: Huh? What'd ya' say?

Tim, standing behind Jason: I regretted saying that immediately.

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shyjusticewarrior · 2 days

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Dick: You're so annoying!

Jason: Good!

[Later]

Jason: ... Forgive me?

Dick: Hm? Yeah, I already did.

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gothamundernightlight · 1 day

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Incorrect Batfam Quotes

Bruce: I hope one of you has a good explanation for this!

Bruce: *points to the Batmobile, which is on fire and upside down

Dick: We have three, actually!

Jason: Yeah, you just have to pick your favorite!

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bibibusinessman · 2 days

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goodoldfashionedengineer · 8 hours

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Tim: What are you guys' favorite cereals?

Damian: Cocoa Puffs

Tim: Good answer, good answer

Jason: Frosties

Dick: *turns to Jason* That is such a basic answer

Jason: So what?! They're good! Let me guess, yours is like Fruit Loops, the Tropical Edition or something!

Dick: No, who do you think I am?! Mine is obviously the "Super Crunch" Edition from 2005

Tim: The Superman cereal? The one that had wildberry, cherry AND cinnamon all in one box?

Damian: I doubt that those are still safe for consumption, Richard

Jason: You were asked to name your favourite cereal and you go ahead and are like "Oh, I like the Ford Bronco produced in 1993! Yes, it has to be from 1993 because the other ones suck actually!" Be a fucking person, Dick!

#batbros #batboys #batfam #batfamily incorrect quotes #incorrect batfamily quotes #incorrect batkids #incorrect batboys quotes #incorrect batboys #batfamily #batman incorrect quotes #incorrect batbros #incorrect batman quotes #tim drake #damian al ghul #damian wayne #jason todd #dick grayson #batkids #batsiblings

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that-random-poseidon-child · 9 hours

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Whoever has the least amount of votes gets eliminated

#batkids #batfamily #my polls #tim drake #dick grayson #damian wayne #jason todd #stephanie brown #cassandra cain #duke thomas #batfam #dc

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true-staff-policy-world · 1 day

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#cosmetics #dirtygirl #cobie smulders #olivia rodrigo #ateez imagines #batkids #peaceful #kaz brekker #ahri #maternity #Rachelfit #actuallymentallyill #traveling #90s movies #[alice in borderland]

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incorrectbatfam · 1 day

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I love your blog, also can I have Dick Grayson annoying his siblings pls?

Duke: *checks the traffic*

Duke: Damn, forty-five minutes to school?

Dick: You think that's bad? Back in my day, I had to trapeze uphill in the snow both ways.

———————

Tim: *on the phone*

Dick: *sitting next to him eating loudly*

Tim: Can you not?

Dick: *smack* Lemme think. *smack* No.

———————

Dick: *knocks a vase over*

Cass: Ooooh.

Dick: Alfred, Cass broke the vase!

———————

Steph: *eating*

Dick, across the table: Can I try some?

Steph: No.

Dick: *ties a fork to his grapple*

———————

Damian: *painting while drinking tea*

Dick: *swaps the cups*

Damian: *takes a sip*

Damian, sputtering: GRAYSON!

———————

[Jason's safehouse]

Jason: *cooking*

Dick: *perched outside the window*

Jason: No, you can't have any.

Dick: *presses his face against the glass*

Jason: Go away.

Dick: *rubs fingerprints all over*

Jason: *closes the curtains*

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little-employee-find-away · 2 days

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#buy my premium #nick offerman #neural network #river song #kpop headers #cosmetics #dirtygirl #cobie smulders #olivia rodrigo #ateez imagines #batkids #peaceful #kaz brekker #ahri

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stag-nite · 3 days

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Mornings before work

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