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ahfrickenfrick · 10 days

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dick: i just think it’s really funny how you call tim pretender

jason: why

dick: roy and kori were MY friends first :(

jason: get over yourself

dick: and now tim has a speedster best friend too :(

dick: heh, guess you can’t beat the original blueprint 😙

jason: you really jumped from being upset to accepting that

dick: to be fair the one thing that bruce really taught us was to compartmentalize our emotions

jason: yeah that was really the only thing that has really stuck for me, huh?

dick: really pisses alfred off

#whatever alfred is being paid; tripple it #dick grayson is a little shit #jason todd is a menace #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #nightwing #red hood #dc robin #koriand'r #roy harper #bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth #dc comics #dc #batman #batfamily #incorrect batfamily quotes #incorrect quotes

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undertheredhood · 7 months

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jason 'perfect poker face' todd: and that is the story of how i got myself permenantly banned from three countries in the span of two months!

tim 'know it all' drake: *immediately picking up his stalking hobby because he doesn't know if jason is telling the truth or not*

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panakina · 13 days

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AU of Lost days where Jason blew up the Batmobile before Bruce got back to it, then left without explaining or revealing himself. Every few months he comes back to town and blows it up again just to really torment the man. When Batman stops using the batmobile at all, he spices things up by blowing up one of Bruce Wayne’s cars. Really make him sweat.

#jason todd #red hood #jason todd is a menace #its his funniest trait #there's no point to this #dc #batman #bruce wayne #batfam

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strange-birb · 8 months

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Jason🫡 my bb

Jason Todd design for secret band AU. Honestly not too different from typical Jason design. I have him as the guitar player.

Most changes for all of them is on stage lol

His hair I love his hair and playing with the ways to style it!!

He unlike Tim and Steph is going to be in pretty much the same clothing per show(keeps it simple….kinda)

Anywayy I love Jason so much and I just picture him screaming and shredding. I’m placing him at a dimebag level for my own personal satisfaction and amusement……

Part 1. Part2.

:)

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multifanritz · 2 years

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i had to explain what 'smh' means to my grandma the other day so now im thinking about bruce not knowing texting slang and jason giving him incorrect info.

Bruce: What does S-M-H mean?

Jason, grinning: It means 'So Many Hugs.' So you could text 'Love you smh.'

Bruce: Oh :)

-Later-

Dick: Why the fuck did Bruce text me 'I miss you smh'???

#jason tells him others #and the bats have to guess wtf he thinks he means #he thinks lmao #stands for 'lets meet again okay?'#jason told him its something u send after u spend time with someone #kekeke #jason todd is a menace #jason todd #bruce wayne #dick grayson #batman #dc comics #text post

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sunsoaked-living-blog · 1 year

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LORD Jason has GOT to be my favorite batkid (after Steph ofc) that roasts the absolute snot out of Bruce at any given time

Reading the latest chapter for Crying, my little one, footsore and weary? By llamallamaduck and was HOWLING at Jason’s interview answers at the end.

Convinced part of the criteria to become Robin is to be, at your SOUL, an absolute troll menace

#jason todd #batman #bruce wayne #the batman #robin #batman and robin #Jason Todd is a menace #but so are all of the batkids #it just varies by hour #love how endeared and bewildered the Jason in this fic is #but no matter what that kid WILL harasses Bruce to his dying day and even beyond

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strawberry-forest-does-stuff · 3 months

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#batfam incorrect quotes #batfam #batfamily #nightwing #dick grayson #red hood #jason todd #red robin #red robin dc #tim drake #tim drake is a menace

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catpriciousmarjara · 8 months

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Getting a PHD literally anywhere else: Wow! Congratulations! What a great achievement! Amazing!

Getting a PHD in Gotham: Wow! Amazing! You're now on several Government, Civilian, and Bat watchlists.

So if any of the Wayne kids get a PHD, then the entirety of Gotham would be squinting at them suspiciously. They're rich, so resources, and most likely already insane with all the shit they pull.

What I'm saying is if Jason went and got himself a Doctorate in Literature, the whole city would anticipate the appearance of his villainsona called the Dead Poet(emphasis on the dead) or Bookkeeper or something else similarly nerdy and themed like that for sure.

I just know that it would turn into some Gotham inside joke with memes abound, and everytime Jason would, I don't know, give more funding to the neglected Arts Departments in Gotham University, or go to a school for read alongs to encourage kids to read, Gotham social media would go crazy and be like:

"The Dreaded Villain Dead Poet Reads Alice in Wonderland to Children! How Despicable!"

"Villain Dead Poet Lambasts Government on Banning Books! Leads Librarians to Riot!"

"Dead Poet Ramps up his Villainy by Establishing Educational Programmes in Crime Alley! Uplifting the Poor! What a Dastardly Villain!"

"Dead Poet Goes on Live Ranting About his Favourite Books! Favourite Author is Jane Austen! Is this the Feminist Agenda?"

And so on! It's a meme that refuses to go away. His siblings actively participate, and make the situation worse.

Dick held an online Gotham Villains and Anti-Heroes Poll and Dead Poet came out on top, over Red Hood. Jason is an actual Gotham crime boss, but his crowdfunded villainsona is more popular. No he's not salty about it at all.

Duke would create a montage of Dead Poet sightings.

Stephanie would make a Dead Poet meme compilation.

Tim would arrange Wayne Enterprises to donate to local libraries after allegedly being threatened by the heinous villain Dead Poet. (Jason did ask Tim to do that but not like that)

Barbara created an extremely popular Villain Watch account for Dead Poet.

Cass tweeted out Jason's favourite books as the villain Dead Poets reading list telling people to avoid them 'wink wonk', causing a massive uptick in the sale of those books ala Bigolas Dickolas.

Damian of all people tweeted out a pic of Jason playing with Alfred the cat accusing the evil villain Dead Poet of attempting to kidnap his cat.

And thats not to mention all the shenanigans they pull in their batsonas.

God bless Gotham and it's home grown, organic, not even remotely ethically sourced, free range chaos.

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thedevilundercover · 4 months

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Tim Drake de-aging fic but everyone is just kind blown how that little monster is the Timothy Jackson Drake that they know.

He’s not even a gremlin, he’s just mean and knows a little too much about stuff than the usual rich brat.

Damian: tsk, you’re such a disgrace the Wayne name.

Tiny!Tim: yeah? And your mother should have swallowed, but we’re both here aren’t we?

or

Jason, thinking he could bully smol Timmy: you stopped so low that you replaced a dead boy! *emo edge lord noises*

Baby!Tim, having learned new slang words via duke and Steph who think this whole thing is hilarious: have you ever thought about just getting better?

Jason: ex-fucking-cuse me?

Tim, shrugging: dying really is just a skill issue ngl

it would be even more funny if he was like this only to Damian and Jason so everyone thinks Tim is such a smart, adorable little boy but the two of them are screaming at Dick and Bruce to get that fucking demonic child exorcised

#tim drake #He deserves to be a little asshole #De-aged Tim drake #kid tim drake #unhinged tim drake #Damian Wayne #jason todd #bruce wayne #dick grayson #red robin #batfam #tim drake is a menace #tim drake headcanon #incorrect dc quotes #stephanie brown #duke thomas

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gothamundernightlight · 6 months

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Incorrect Batfam Quotes

Damian: Drake, I have need of your aid. My class is being forced to do a Secret Santa and I got the class bully. What should I get him?

Tim: Make him a Where’s Waldo book but photoshop Waldo out of every picture.

Damian: …

Dick: …

Jason: …

Jason: That’s cruel, but I love it! Do that!

Dick: Tim, didn’t you give me a Where’s Waldo book last year?

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ahfrickenfrick · 29 days

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jason: ur just a pretender and a fraud

tim: idc that you died kys again

jason: …

jason: this kid’s a riot

#let tim drake say kys 2024 #tim drake is a menace #and a little shit #dc comics #batman #dc #batfamily #tim drake #jason todd #dc robin #red robin #red hood #incorrect batfamily quotes #incorrect quotes

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undertheredhood · 7 months

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au where jason doesn’t become the red hood, but slowly gets his revenge on the batfamily by tricking them into believing that his ghost is haunting them for failing to avenge him.

#dc comics #dc universe #dcu #batman #red hood #jason todd #jason peter todd #jason was never the angry robin #batfamily #batfam #jason todd deserves better #jason todd au #jason todd gets his revenge #jason ends up using the all blades to kill the joker and it freaks the batfam out #jason todd is a little shit #jason todd is a menace

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deadsetobsessions · 4 months

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What Do You Have There?

A knife!

Danny plunked the butter knife in its pedestal of importance. The nice thing about having a billionaire vigilante for a... foster is the amount of money Danny was allowed to drop on his hobbies. For example, his extensive collection of souvenirs.

They're not just any old regular souvenirs. No, no, no. That would be so boring! No, these souvenirs, he obtained from the various muggings, knife fights, and various other situations he's been in ever since he was dropped ungraciously into Gotham.

The butter knife? Damian. Precocious, stabby Damian who he had startled into the stab instinct. A point of pride, really. Danny knew Damian was good at fighting! It was practically, in ghost terms, a super enthusiastic hello! Yes, the butter knife would be kept in the well lit part of the wall. Alfred had told him to stay home today to recuperate. He didn't need it, since the wound would heal in an hour or two, but he'd take staying at home any day.

A couple of hours later, well into the afternoon and right before what Danny knew to be their patrol hours, Danny had a visitor.

"Danny."

"Oh, hey, Damian! What's up?" Danny turned around to see Damian hovering awkwardly near the door.

"I am here to... check upon your wound. It is imperative that it gets proper treatment."

Ancients, Damian was exactly like those alley kids. He just ate a thesaurus instead of the drawling accent the alley kids picked up. Which meant Damian endeared himself to Danny pretty quickly. Like a little ghostling.

"Oh, I'm good. See? No blood is leaking out of the wound." Danny held up spotless bandages.

Danny watched Damian step into his haunt- his room- with a pleased hum. Damian inspected the bandages and stepped back with a sharp nod of approval. His eyes flicked to the wall that Danny was rearranging (again) and did a double take at the butter knife in the middle.

"Is that the butter knife I stabbed you with?"

"Why, yes, it is!" Danny beamed.

"Why on earth would you display that?"

"Because you stabbed me with it?"

"That makes absolutely no sense, you simpleton! When someone stabs you, stab them back!"

"That would be mean!"

Damian spluttered. Danny tugged the kid closer to the wall, cheering inwardly as Damian didn't shove him away. It might be because he was exaggeratedly wincing as he moved his "injured arm" but Danny has learned to take a win where he could find them, especially with ghosts. Not that Damian was a ghost, but he sure acted like one.

"Do you want to see my collection?"

"Your collection?"

"Yeah!" Without giving him time to answer, Danny barreled ahead. "So this is the knife you stabbed me with. Which, by the way, was an awesome show of strength and accuracy."

Damian grimaced. Danny continued blithely, secretly memorizing Damian's reactions to laugh at later.

"And this is the knife those guys stabbed me with that one time Cass found me. And this one is a bullet someone shot at me down by the docks. I think I interrupted some kind of meeting?"

Damian's jaw had a slight tick to it that would have been a baffled frown on anyone else.

"And when was this?"

"Oh, like a week ago."

"What? When did you go to the docks?!"

"At night. I couldn't sleep."

"And you went to the docks?! How did you even get there?!"

"Walked," Danny lied, like a lying liar. He floated, obviously, but none of them knew that. "Anyways, this is a law book! Someone threw it at my head!"

"Hey, guys! What're you doing?"

Danny and Damian turned around.

"Richard? Brown? What are you doing here?"

"Oh, Bruce wanted me to come back for the weekend," Dick said. Danny knew it was code for "something's going down and we need back up." Man, he still couldn't believe they didn't know he knew they were crime fighting vigilantes.

"Same!" Stephanie said. Danny was glad to see that her wounds from "cartwheeling in the manor" were healed.

"I see. Danny was showing me his collection of... objects people have used as weapons against him."

"What?!"

"Yeah!" Danny beamed, completely innocent. "Come on! I'll show you!"

With that, Danny continued to ramble. He just knew that the way Dick's and Stephanie's smiles strained would give him a good laugh for weeks to come. "And this is the glass bottle a drunk tried to shank me with in Crime Alley, and this is a knife the Red Hood himself threw at me."

Dick interrupted, face stiff. "Hood threw a knife at you?!"

"Yeah, but that was because my kids broke into his safe house and I was trying to get them to stop looting the place. And he didn't know I was a kid too, so he aimed a gun at my head. He shot at me too, but I couldn't go back to get the bullet, or else it would have joined my collection." Danny grabbed a box and shook it, metal rattling inside.

Dick smiled sweetly, Stephanie and Damian inching away from it.

"Oh, wow, I see!"

----

In his apartment, Jason shuddered. He grabbed his guns.

"Something's wrong. I just know it," he muttered to himself.

----

Danny smiled innocently as he described the horrific, near death events he got his souvenirs from.

"This is my bullet box! Man, Gotham has a lot of gun fights. I got shot so many times!" Danny complained, shaking the box like a rattling toy.

"Did you know Danny snuck out to go to the bay?" Damian snitched immediately, like a snitch.

"The Bay?! Danny! You know that's where people dump bodies, right?!" Stephanie poked him in the arm.

"Yeah, but like... I wouldn't die. And besides! I missed my friends!"

"You mean the minions you made in Crime Alley?" Steph asked. Danny pouted, eyeing the way Dick's gaze roved over his souvenirs and paling the more he realized how often Danny "got hurt."

Damian bumped a shoulder against Dick's arm. Danny returned to the conversation.

"If anything, I'm their minion." He said, remembering the times the Alley kids sent him on food runs.

"Fear Danny, the overlord of street rats."

Danny snorted. And- "Oh! Yeah, there was like a weird owl looking guy? And then they stabbed me with a finger and I kept it because woah, cool talon looking thing, right? And then they threw a bunch of those tiny knives at me? And then they just kind of vanished? Gotham is so weird."

And now, with all of them pale and stressed out of their minds, Danny swung a devastating blow called guilt trip.

"And that's the batarangs!" Three heads swung over to the line of batarangs. "Those vigilantes kept throwing them at me! One of them even hit me in the arm. Those things are sharp, man."

"Uh. Which ones?" Stephanie asked.

"Hm?" Danny hummed obliviously.

"Do you know which vigilantes?"

"Oh, it was like... the purple one. And the sword one? And like the one with the yellow insignia in the middle. And... all of them, I think? Except for signal. That guy's cool."

Stephanie and Damian had matching veiled looks of guilt. Dick shot them a sharp look. Danny decided to deal the last bit of damage to Dick.

"I'm glad you guys are way less stabby than the general Gotham public though, butter knife incident aside. At least I don't have to worry about you guys getting into danger, right? If you guys got hurt like my family did... I don't know..."

Danny smiled-squinted at them, channeling Cujo at his cutest and saddest: when he doesn't get to eat off of Danny's plate. So, pretty sad and pathetic.

"Uh, yeah." Dick said, guilt splayed all over his face. "Alfred said dinner was almost ready."

"Yes," Damian cleared his throat, looking away. "We shall partake in Pennyworth's hard work."

"Ahaha!" Stephanie laughed, nervously. "Welp, let's go bother Tim!"

Falling into step behind them, Danny grinned.

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snakeredbirdbatkatana · 7 months

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Tim Drake is usually called the smart Robin which I like don't get me wrong but all of the bats are smart and I do love my Tim but my Tim is just a bit different.

I want Tim drake half out of his mind fucking with Lex Luthor while he chugs 6 monsters. I want baby stalker who was heavy breathing putting together a red string murder board at 3:00 am with very sketchy stalker pictures of the Wayne's.

I want titans tower where Tim knew it was Jason and is about to home alone that shit. While also internally fanboying and giving Jason tips on how to murder the joker.

Tim Drake who doesn't get disturbed by Ra on Tuesday cause he knows Tim has plans with young Justice and Tim will destroy all of his bases again if he is bothered.

Tim who thought Damian was adorable and everytime he makes an attempt on his life gets a new paint set because that is the Drake way and no little brother of his isn't gonna understand premeditated murder.

TIM Drake who owns up to the clones and the boy who Kon knows is a little murdery gremlin and loves that about his boyfriend.

My Tim drake need to be balls to the wall fucking insane or I don't want that shit.

#tim drake #batfamily #jason todd #damian wayne #dick grayson #bruce wayne #bamf batfamily #Bamf Tim drake #feral tim drake #chaotic tim drake #mad scientist #tim drake is a menace #deranged tim drake

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begaycommittreason · 2 years

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people talk about how jason must’ve been the biggest menace in the batfam as a street kid

but at the age of 9 dick was literally planning a revenge murder and had No regard for bruce’s orders or authority as a parent

tim was a rich kid that wouldn’t know adult supervision if it was murdered by a boomerang, who stalked the bats across gotham, discovered their identities, and strong-armed bruce into giving him robin at 13

steph was fighting crime before bruce even got to her and she proceeded to never once listen to him in her life

cass and damian, i love them, but they were Feral. absolute Gremlin children

then there was jason who liked going to school and was just happy to be there

#like he got in school fights sure #but tim was probably running illegal poker rings at gotham academy #dick’s mullet was a menace in and of itself #don’t even get me started on damian #batfam #jason todd #tim drake #damian wayne #cassandra cain #dick grayson

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brucewaynehater101 · 22 days

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For those Titan's Tower AUs where Tim is all like, "That's Jason, so I'll let him torture/kill me when he pops by," what if Red Hood walks in on Robin being extra prepared. Tim greets him at the door with a smile, beckons him on over, and shows him the table of torture devices he gathered. It's almost like a kid trying to show their parent the amazing job they did in hopes they'll be praised.

"I wasn't sure which ones you preferred to use, so I grabbed a variety just in case."

#tim drake is a menace #unhinged tim drake #tim drake #jason todd #no angst for this one just tim being helpful and jason being confused/concerned/disturbed #bonus points if jason tries to tell the bats about it and tim gaslights everyone to not believe him #“are you saying I had all the tools to torture me ready? I'm not saying you're lying but that's a bit much”#Jason's about ready to lose his godsdamned mind

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